Choices
by SelinaShadow
Summary: Bella is the total package: brains, style, money, looks and popularity. She's also the Forks high's Bad Girl/Player, that swings both ways. What happens when the Cullen's move to town and Alice is absorbed by her mystery, that is Bella Swan. And will she figure out her secrets? And make her change for the better?
1. Chapter 1

**Summery: Bella is the total package: brains, style, money, looks and popularity. She's also the Forks high's Bad Girl/Player, that swings both ways. What happens when the Cullen's move in to tow and Alice is absorbed by her mystery that is Bella Swan. And will she figure out her secrets?**

**A/N: Welcome people of all… places? Watev's look, I was listening to one of my favorite bands Tatu and this idea came up about Alice and Bella. If you don't like fanfics with them as a couple then do not read it. Or do, don't really care.**

**I'm still continuing Shadows of a Star im just a bit blocked on how to go from there. It's not even near the ending but I wanted to write this story for sooooooooo freaking long! xD ok, well enough of me bugging you guys. Read and Review! Plz! Oh, and I wrote this because it was needed that in a fanfic Bella be the bad ass! She needs to be a bad ass! Not like most fanfics where she's either supper shy, clumsy and stuff.**

**Ch.1**

**Bpov**

I awoke to an annoying beeping noise that could only be classified as my fucking alarm clock. I start fumbling with my hands against the night stand only to hit something sharp. "Mother fucker." I growl and take the blanket off my eyes. I look at the night stand to see thumb tacks all around the alarm, who the fuck?... oh, right. My idea.

I sigh and sit up on the bed running a hand through my hair, I chuckle when I see the thumb tacks, Jake had given me the idea while we were both stoned as shit and me being the crazy bitch I am, did it. I laugh to my self as I get off the bed and silence the damn clock.

I look in the mirror and smirk, I'm only in my underwear. And shit, I look hot. My soft tanned skin giving me just a bit of a glow, my long brown hair and my deep brown chocolate eyes. I grin as I poke my abdomen, fit as a fiddle. I sigh and chuckle as I remember my toddler years when I couldn't even walk over a flat surface.

How lucky I am that I grew out of it and my hand eye coordination also is better. I walk over to the bathroom and turn on the shower and brush my teeth while the water has a chance to get warm. I peel of my underwear and bra and step in to the steaming shower my muscles relaxing so sweetly.

I take a medium long shower and when I step out I walk back to my room. After I get dressed in black Jeans, a black wife beater and a button up long-sleeved purple plaid shirt –left open- I grab my awesome motorcycle boots and slip them on. I look at the mirror and sigh while I contemplate what to do with my hair.

After a minute I sigh and decide to go with the usual, just woke up out of bed curly hair with hair gel and hair spray. After I was done I go to the dresser and put on some eyeliner, lip gloss and grabbed my black sunglasses off and walked down stairs.

And yes I know its stupid to have sunglasses in the sunless town of Forks but I like them, they keep my eyes hidden and I know it was the only thing that showed emotion. I also liked that they gave me the sense of mystery and danger. But in simpler term's –the one I gave my… acquaintance's- is that they made me feel cool.

I walk down the stairs and frown a bit to my self, "I should have moved out…" I mumble as I feel the loneliness creep in. I grab a bowl of cereal and sit down at the table mulling over my thoughts, I'm Isabella Marie Swan. I prefer Bella, my mom died when I was 10 in a car jacking gone wrong and my father died last year of cancer. I'm seventeen years old but I am so close to my birthday I sweet talked and bribed my way out of a foster home. I get a monthly visitor to check on my 'state of mind' but seeing as I support my self they don't really bother me.

My mother and father apparently were from money, old money. My great, great-grandfather or some shit like that had invented some weird beer that was a huge hit in Europe. I had people who handled the beer industry, my trusty friend and supposed guardian Jason Jenks. So I had a massive income and don't have to deal with all the shit of that business. And so I had more cash then I needed, a big house, a great car and lived by my self.

Practically any teens dream, only that sometimes when I allow to think to myself… I miss my parents.

I shake my head out of my thoughts and grimace when my cereal is all mushy, I dispose of the soggy cereal, clean my bowl and grab my key's from the counter. I walk back to my room to grab my cell phone, cigarettes, lighter, and walk back down to grab my backpack from the living room and walk out of the house.

I walk over to the garage and open it with the button and grin when I see my babies, a black Mercedes McLaren Roadster and my black with red detail 2012 Suzuki Hayabusa. They were the most ostentatious cars in town and I loved them. My motorcycle wasn't for everyone, only for people who knew what they were doing, like me. The horse power this baby had, was something to be bargained with.

But, even though I loved my bike, my Mercedes was the car I mostly drove. I only used the bike on sunny day's or on cloudy but dry days. Unless I would travel out-of-town for one of my dates, then I would switch it up ever once in a while.

I chuckle to my self and get in my Mercedes. I rev the engine and pull out quickly, I didn't bother looking around seeing as I lived on the outskirts of the town. I clicked the button that would close my garage and checked my clock. 7:34am. I still had forty-two minutes until school started, I take the phone from my pocket and dial-up Jake.

"Hello?" he asks. I grin "Jake, you dressed fag?" I ask smiling leaning back in the car. I hear him growl "I'm not the gay one." He says chuckling. I smirk "So does that mean you're not dressed?" I ask in a low voice, I can't keep the smirk from my face. "I'm dressed, perv." He says.

I pout "Aw, you ruin my fun. So anyway, I'm giving you a ride to school." I say to him. Not giving him the option to say no. He chuckles "Sure thing, Bells." He says. I grin "Awesome, I'm on my way now." I say and hang up. I lower my dark sunglasses, turn the stereo full blast, lower the roof and speed away.

I drum my fingers along the steering wheel as I bob my head to the music. I stop at the red light and hear giggling. I look to the side to see Jessica and Lauren in the car next to me. I smile and lift my glasses up, I wink at Jessica and she giggles "Hey, Jessica." I say seductively. She was a good lay, but she was too clingy. I remember the excruciating puppy dog-ness from her. But still, there was only so many people I can fuck with in Forks.

"Hey, Bella." She says and gives me a soft wave. I'm about to speak but the light turns green, I turn to Jessica give her a wink lower my sun glasses and speed off. I grin, all the way to La Push and stop in front of Jacob's house. Jacob walked quickly over to me and I waved at Billy as he walked out of the house and to his car.

Charlie had helped Billy get a hip replacement that he had needed. Billy was in a wheel chair but now, after making a full recovery was walking again and looked like the happiest man alive. Jacob raises an eyebrow when he sees me. "You look hot." He says. I nod in thank you and after he gets in I turn and drive back to town.

I lower the volume to allow conversation "So, what's up?" He asks. I grin, "Jessica still wants me." I say and I hear his chuckle. "Why am I not surprised?" He asks. I laugh. "I'm not sure, why is that?" I ask him. He shrugs "You're a player and you go both ways. Its impossible not to want you." He says smiling at me.

I shrug "I need to keep my grounds open, can't get bored now can we?" I retort. He shrugs and I laugh at his hypocrisy. "Jake, you're as much as a player then I am. Stop moping and feel happy, this douche bag town won't know any better. All the girls are mostly bi curious and all the guys love a lesbian." I say. He sighs "That solves your problem, not mine." He says.

I slow the car down and lift my sunglasses to look at him. "Your kidding right? We both know you enjoy to console whatever girl I dump. And for the one's that don't like me, which is about… half of them, you have probably banged a good percentage." I say to him as I pull in to the school. I look at the clock and see that its 8:02am.

I grin and park in my space. Jake and I step out of the car and I hit the button for the cover to slip over it. I lean on my car and look at Jake. "We both know, that the problem isn't what we play with. It's what we will end up with." Jake says. I smile softly at him. "Jake, you'll find someone, trust me. Maybe not in this stupid little town but out there, you will find someone." I say.

He nods and flashes me a grin and I can see his eyes that he is back. I laugh. "That's my boy." I say and we walk to the school. Jake and I separate ways and I get to class on time for a change. I can see Mr. Nash is surprised to see me enter early to class by the way he stops and inspects me.

I ignore him and walk to the seat on the side of the class occupied by Jessica Stanley. I sit next to her desk and lean over to her "Hello, Jess." I say sweetly. "Bella." She says in a strange voice, its supposed to sound seductive. I grin at her fail, "I was wondering, how you have been? You haven't called me back in so long…" I trail off giving her a soft look.

Her cheeks redden a bit and her eyes glaze over and I try to swallow my laughter. She's so fucking easy it's not even fun, she flips her hair over her shoulder "I've been busy." She says looking at me from under her lashes. I frown a fake frown but she will believe it, my eyes smolder a bit and by the way her breathing hitches for a moment I know she will fall, if only for a one night stand.

I raise an eyebrow and lean in so close my lips almost brush her ear "We both know that your never busy enough for me Jess…" I say the 's' slowly and she shudders. Her eyes meet mine and she's looking at me in the signature 'I want you' face. I grin and get up from my chair and walk to the back of the class where my real seat is.

The bell rings and my phone buzzes in my pocket. I grin and grab it and flip it to read the message. It's from Jessica, 'Want 2 cum over 2night?' she texts. I grin at her 'cum' association. 'I don't know Jess… what if your busy?' I challenge and send to her. Her reply is almost instant. 'I have nothing to do other than, lick ur pussy clean.' She txt and I thank God my sunglasses are on because my eyes shot up.

Jess has a dirty little mouth on her. I chuckle and send her a txt back, 'Sounds good, I'll be over late. Or eventually' I send and she doesn't reply. She knows not to smother me to much. I pretend to pay attention in class just drawing on the corner of the paper. I had studied all this material in Phoenix, in my advance classes while I was in middle school. This school had nothing to offer me that I did not already know, resulting in my perfect GPA and my constant skipping.

I stop when I enter my fourth hour Spanish class. Sitting next to my seat in the back is a girl, she's has short spiky pitch black hair. That's as much as I can tell from over here, I walk over to my chair and her head snaps up. I freeze for a moment, she's beautiful, breath-taking even. Her pale skin, hazel eyes and pitch black spiky hair fits perfectly attune.

I sit down next to my chair and give a soft smile, who is she? Were did she come from? Is she new in town? I hadn't heard anything about a new family coming into town… interesting. I flash her a grin "Hello, my name is Bella. Can I ask yours?" I say politely. That's something guys lacked of knowledge, girls react well to politeness not indifference.

Her eyes stay on mine but for a moment they travel up and down my body and I can't suppress the smirk. What!? I am a very attractive woman, It's not my fault. I lift my sunglasses to my hair and lift an eyebrow. She shakes her head and blushes "A- Alice." She squeaks. I chuckle softly at her shyness and look back at the teacher for a moment nodding.

"Alice…hmm, I like it." I say and turn to pay attention to the class. I already knew Spanish so I didn't really care what the teacher was saying. But mostly I couldn't help but pay attention to the girl next to me. Alice, she kept fidgeting and chasing glances at me whenever she though I was not paying attention.

I sighed in boredom after the teacher had stopped talking. I turn back to the girl and saw that she is now lost in a drawing, I see that it's a dress and it's beautiful. Hm… she wants to be a designer? "I'm sorry if I'm intruding or over stepping my grounds but that is amazing." I say to her. She stops when she hears my voice and her head snaps to me and she flashes me a smile.

Im momentarily dazed but snap out of it to her words "Thank you, and no. You are not intruding or over stepping your grounds." She says to me. I nod thoughtfully and I let my eyes scan over this beautiful girl. Pail skin, hazel eyes, full perfect lips, small breasts, amazing smile, slim figure and… she's short. My eyes shine with amusement while I wonder how short she really is.

"So I don't think I caught your last name, Alice?" I ask. She nods for a moment and turns to me "Cullen." She says. I nod, "Alice Cullen… fitting. So, people all day might have asked you this but, what brings you to the most boring town in the world?" I ask with a smile. She answers normally. Then again, not everyone had a bad reason to move to this town.

I shake my head from my thoughts and look at her again, shit I missed what she had said. "I'm sorry can you repeat that? I got lost in thought for a moment." I say politely. She grins "I said that, 'I moved here because my father, Dr. Cullen got a job offer at the hospital here and my mother wanted to live in a small town." She says. I nod, perfectly good reasons.

I check my watch and see that the bell is about to ring, I slide my shades back on and hold my notebook and pen with one hand. "Well, it was nice to meet you Alice Cullen. Hope you have a nice stay in Forks." I say and stand just as the bell rings. I walk out swiftly to the hallway and walk to my locker. I open it quickly and switch notebooks, I am about to close the door when I'm slammed in to it.

I don't know how but something managed to slam me in to the locker face first and I hit my forehead to it. I groan, "Mother fucker." I say as I turn to look at the person who slammed me against the locker. A huge beast of a boy is standing behind me with a shocked expression, "What. The. Fuck." I say to him. He try's to offer me a grin but I'm unfazed "I'm sorry, I didn't see you there." He says.

I look him up and down, never seen him in my life. I'm still fuming but don't feel like getting detention today, besides the guy is huge almost 6'5 feet. "You new here?" I ask more for the people around us then for his help. He nods but stays quiet, I sigh "Name, lover boy." I say. "Oh, um, Emmett Cullen." He says. I stiff a nod. "Lucky your new, do that again and you will be fucked." I mumble to him as I grab my notebook from the floor along with my pen and walk to the edge of circle of people.

"MOVE." I say to them and they quickly space out giving me a pathway. I walk swiftly down the hall and in to Calc. 2 while, Martin my math teacher has already started. He stops the class when I enter. "Late again Miss Swan." He states. I shrug "Got pushed head first against a locker, you tell me if your up for math after that." I say grinning and sitting down in the back.

People in the classroom start to whisper and ignore his lecture and I just lean there listening to him. I write a few of the things down and do them while I hear students whispers. 'Who would push Bella into a locker?' 'Do they have a death wish?' 'My hero.' 'Can't say I don't feel bad.' 'Hope she's ok.' 'Did the girl get beat up like that Martha girl last year?'

I sigh and lean back in my chair tired of the whispers. People hearing my sigh turn for a moment before I slide the shades over my eyes and ignore them. My teachers, have no problem with me wearing sunglasses as long as I keep my grade's on A which is easy. Class finally lets out and I walk back to my locker to see Jake leaning next to it.

He walks over to me when he sees me "You ok? I heard some dick pushed you and you hit your face against a locker." He says checking my neck from side to side. I wave him off chuckling. "It's going to take a lot more than that to knock me out, hun." I say as I dump my notebook and walk with him to the lunch room.

I stop at the door and look around until I see our table… and it's not empty. Well that's nothing new I have a lot of friends. I mean that its extremely full even on a normal day I go to the line and grab a bottle of water and a cookie and wait for Jake to finish his buffet. I walk over to the table and smile when my seat is empty, I don't care enough to see who is at the table but once I sit down I hear Jessica's voice.

"Hey, babe. You Cumming over tonight?" She asks placing a hand on my arm and sliding it down. I grin to myself and shrug. "Not sure, depends on a few things." I say to her. I hear the table snicker softly but fall quiet. "What would that be?" she asks 'seductively'. I grin again at her fail, I lick my lips to mess with her and lean forward until my face is an inch apart from hers. "If I'm horny and what you plan to do to me?" I ask seductively.

I lift my sunglasses up and give her a small smirk. She grins and leans in to my ear to whisper her plans for tonight, I grin, frown and smirk. Thankfully she can't see my lips but the table is chuckling softly to themselves. I smirk at Jake and he just rolls his eyes. I pull away from Jessica's rambling about liking and place a finger over her lips.

"Honey, save some breath for tonight. Your going to need it." I say and turn back to open my water bottle. I hear her 'hmm' and she stands and walks away. Once she's out of ear shot I mumble "Fuck, I'm not that desperate for a lay. Shes not even that good." I say to the table who laughs a bit.

Just then I look to the end and see lover boy. I grin when I see him staring at his tray. "Hey, Lover boy." I say to him. He looks up and stares at me confused. "Your talking to me?" he asks. I roll my eyes and nod. "Yes, I was just going to say that… I'm just messing with you. I don't give a shit if you pushed me against the locker." I say taking a swig of water.

He flashes me a dimple grin but the blond next to him gasps. "You pushed her against a locker?" she asks. I grin, and look her up and down quickly from under my shades. She's hot… but to… difficult for me (difficult being, I don't want to be around her 24/7 giving her my attention.). Emmett's eyes go wide and he looks from the girl to me.

He doesn't even have a chance to defend himself when she hits him on the back of the head. "Idiot." She sighs to him. I laugh and so do the table at the exchange. "So, lover boy. How are you liking your first day?" I ask. He nods. "Its been awesome so far." He says. I nod and swallow the bite of cookie I was eating.

"So, how many siblings to you have besides…" I trail off and look at the blond. I lift my shades and leave them on my hair and look at her. "I'm sorry, beautiful. I didn't catch your name, would you mind telling me it?" I ask softly from under my lashes. She grins "Rosalie." She says and her tone is freaking bad ass. It throws power and I like it. I grin at her, I like her. Not as potential lay but as a friend.

"Ok, so lover boy and Rosalie. How many siblings do you guys have? I think I ran into… the short one." I say and Emmett booms out a laugh. "That's Alice." He says. I nod. "Right she told me. I just forgot, so is it only you three?" I asks.

He shakes his head. "You haven't met Edward and this is Jasper. Eddie's around here somewhere." He mumbles. I nod at Jasper, he's ripped but not as Emmett, he has honey color hair and blue eyes like Rosalie. I smile at him. "Nice to meet you, Jasper." I say sweetly, he grins. I look back to Jake who glares I shrug. "Oh, come one Jake. Allow me at least some fun." I say. He smiles and shakes his head. "Forgive, Bella. She's a bit of a hearth throb in our small town." He says to the new kids.

I laugh "Honey, I'm nothing if not _the_ heart-throb. I mean your hot but… your no me." I say grinning at him. He rolls his eyes and I hear the table laugh. I wink at him and take a long drink of water. "So, not that I'm trying to be offensive in any way. But how are you at my table?" I ask the three new kids.

Emmett grins. "I beat your friend over here at basketball." He says clapping Mike's shoulder. I grin. "Good for you, show that little dipshit who's boss." I say grinning. Mike stares at me and I wink, he grins. Yes, he's another one of my lays. I get bored! And sex is fun as hell.

"Hey, you like this little dipshit." He says. I laugh. "You do know you just admitted to being a dipshit, but don't worry. I'll keep you around if you don't smell." I grin. He sighs and I chuckle. The first 30 minutes of lunch are spent like this. After a while I start to crave a smoke, I look at my watch I still have twenty minutes left. I stand up. "I'm going out for a smoke break, don't do anything fun while I'm gone." I say and walk to the back doors to the outside benches.

I stop when I see, Alice. She's sitting alone and huddled close together like she's cold or something. I frown and walk over to her, I'm momentarily shocked as to why I care but shake it of and make my presence known. "Um.. Alice?" I ask softly as to not scare her.

She sniffles "Go away." She says softly. I frown "I can't, what's wrong?" I ask. What happened to her? She was all smiles an hour ago.

She sniffles a little and I take out a napkin from my back pocket and hand it to her. She wipes her nose and chances a glance at me. "Thank you." she says softly. I shrug and sit down on the seat across from her "Not a big deal, now. Can you tell me what has you down? You were all smiles when I saw you this morning." I say softly.

"Its nothing, it's just the change from place…. I miss all my friends." She says softly. I nod. "I know how that feels." I say softy. She turns to face me "You do?" she asks. I nod and bite my lip for a moment. "Yeah… I moved here a year ago from Phoenix. So I get that you miss your friends… it gets easier after a while." I say softly, trying to console the girl. Damn, I still don't know how short she is, I'm dying to find out but it will have to wait.

Alice nods but a tear spills from her eyes. I tentatively cup her cheek to wipe a tear away, not liking to see her like this. I frown a bit, why do I care? I never care… shit, I'm going soft. But… her skin is so soft and warm. I rub away another tear as it spills before I realize what I'm doing. Damn, with a soft sigh I drop my hand. "I… I'm sorry." I say and look to the woods. "It's fine. No harm done, thank you though." She says. I look at her and frown. "For what?" I ask. She offers me a smile. "For being here, comforting me… its not common for a person to do that to a common stranger." She says.

I shrug and start to feel a little edgy I take my pack out and look at her. "Do you mind?" I ask. She shakes her head and I light one quickly, I hold in the smoke for a moment before blowing it out. "Um, can I have one?" She asks. I stare back at her and see that she's serious. I raise an eyebrow. "You smoke?" I ask with a smile. She rolls her eyes. "If I didn't, would I ask for one?" She asks. I nod and shrug and push the box to her along with the lighter.

She lights up quickly and pushes it back to me. We smoke in silence but, after a while I get curious. I want to know what had upset her but at the same time I was mystified about why I cared… I clear my though after an exhale "So, are you going to tell me what really caused the change in demeanor?" I ask. She takes an inhale slowly and shit, it's hot.

The way her thin yet perfect lips trap the cigarette and the way she inhales with a slight moan or hum, then she slowly exhales threw her lips her eyes still closed. Shit, now I'm horny. Fuck, where's Jessica when you need her?

I exhale shakily and avert my eyes to the woods scanning for anything that will hold my interest. She speaks softly, frightened almost. "I'm just not used to being bullied, it's not a big deal." She says. My head snaps up to hers, who the fuck is bullying her? "Who… who's bullying you?" I ask. She looks at me in the eyes, I had taken off my sunglasses throughout our smoke break.

"It's not a big deal." She says. I sigh. "Who is bullying you?" I ask. "Just some blond girls. I don't know their names." She says. I growl to myself. "Tanya, Irina and a red-head?" I ask. She nods slowly. "Victoria." I mutter. "Don't worry, they won't bother you anymore." I say and stand. Her eyes go wide "W-what? No, don't. You will just make it worse." She says. I grin and slide my shades back down, "Trust me, no one will mess with you. Not when I'm around." I say. I check my watch. "I have to go, just… find me if they bother you." I say and walk away from the table once I have everything.

I walk to my next class Biology and smile a bit when I see Jessica sitting in the front seat "Jessica… how about I go over to your house tonight say around… ten? I'll drive around?" I ask smiling. Jessica smiles a grin "Whatever you want." She purrs. I nod and smile at Mr. Banner.

I walk to my table and stop, there's a dude sitting in front of my table. He is thin, slightly build but lanky. Crazy bronze hair, pale skin and piercing green eyes. This must be the other new kid. The last of the Cullen's I had yet to meet. I walk to my table and sit down next to the window, my usual seat. I see that he turns a bit and I flash him a smile. "Hey, your new right?" I ask although I know the answer.

He nods. "Yes." He says. I nod and offer him another smile "Um, my name is Bella. Your… Edward right?" I ask. He nods once thoughtfully, I smile. "I met your siblings at lunch… I'm afraid I didn't catch you." I say. He shrugs. "I'm a bit of a loner." He says with a grin. I laugh softly. "It's healthy sometimes." I say with another shrug.

He nods and just then Mr. Banner starts the class. He turns forward and I start to pay attention to his boring lecture when there's a soft knock on the door. And Mr. Banner walks over to the door and opens it. "Oh, and who are you?" he asks softly. "Um, A-Alice Cullen. I…I got lost." She says softly. Mr. Banner smiles. "Not to worry, come in. Take a seat next to Bella. Bella… behave." He says eyeing me.

I laugh along with the whole classroom "Oh, Mr. B you hurt me. When do I ever not behave well?" I ask him. He smiles "Every day of the week." He says and I gasp out a laugh, "One time! One time did I not behave well in this class and in my defense it was Jessica's fault. She kissed me!" I say pointing at her.

Mr. Banner laughs, being the cool teacher he is. "Your right, Stanley." He says looking at her. Jessica looks at him sheepishly "Stay away from Bella… especially on movie days." He says. I bark out a laugh and Jessica gaps the whole classroom is full of laughter and Alice is frozen next to him. I wink at Jessica and motion for Alice to move to our table.

She walks by quickly and sits next to me I wink at her and mouth "Joking." Before I put an arm around her "Am I allowed to be next to her on Movie days?" I ask with a grin.

Mr. Banner smiles at me and roles his eyes "Yes, Bella. As long as you behave." He says and I nod, pout and let my arm off of Alice. "I make no promises." I say to him and flash him a grin. He rolls his eyes and continues to talk about… molecular structure. Boring.

I shift in my stool and start to take notes but not really caring about it. I look over and see that Alice is staring intently at the class. I rip a piece of my paper and scribble on it and pass it to her.

'Hey, you ok?' I write. She grabs it only after I place it in front of her pen. She reads it quickly and scribbles back at me.

'Yeah, sorry for the freak out. Must seem like a freak to you.' She wrote. I smile slightly and shake my head before writing back.

'Not at all, sorry if I freaked you out about the movie day thing. I promise to be on my best behavior… not that it helps that much.' I write with a grin and pass it to her.

I hear her soft giggle 'Wouldn't that upset Jessica?' she asks. I frown 'Why would it upset Jessica?' I write back. 'Oh… um, I thought you two were a couple.' She writes and when I read it, I erupt in laughter. I try to silence it but Mr. Banner noticed and is walking over. I try to slide the note under my notebook but he grabs it.

"Miss Swan seeing as you find it so funny. Why don't you read this in front of the class so we can all laugh?" He asks. I chuckle. "You sure?" I ask. He nods and I walk and grab the paper from his hands and walk over to his desk and sit on the edge.

"I write to Alice, 'Hey, you ok?' She writes, 'yeah, that was funny.' I lie smoothly to cover her small break down. I wrote 'Oh, so I didn't freak you out with the whole movie day thing? I promise to be on my best behavior… not that it helps that much.' She writes back 'Wouldn't that upset Jessica?' I laughed, 'Why would it upset Jessica?' I send it to her and she writes back 'Oh, um. I thought you two were a couple.' And that's pretty much it." I say with a shrug.

Mr. Banner looks confused "Then what on heaven caused you to laugh?" he asks. I grin. "Doesn't it seem ridiculous that I would date Jessica? I mean, honey. Your awesome in bed but… you're not exactly relationship type." I say looking at her. She gasps and stands smacks me and walks out of the class room. I grin cupping my cheek. "Does that mean I won't come over tonight?" I call out for her still with a grin.

Mr. Banner sighs and I look at him "Mr. B. You just caused me a night alone, where's the fun in that?" I ask. He sighs "Bella, detention." He sighs. I frown. "Really? you cause me to lose a lay and I get detention?" I ask a bit mad yet not able to keep the grin of my face. "Enough, Isabella." He says. I glare at him. "I don't care who you are. Do. Not. Call. Me. Isabella." I growl out.

He raises an eyebrow and I'm glaring at him. "Your father would be disappointed." He mutters and I snap. "Then good fucking thing he is six feet under isn't it?" I growl. Before I know it Mike is behind me and grabbing me along the waist. "You don't know a thing about my father! Don't you dare say if he would or would not be disappointed." I growl out at Mr. Banner.

I see in his eyes that he regrets mentioning it. He knows how touchy the subject of my father is and he also knows how strongly I react to it. I shake off Mike "Let the fuck go of me, fag." I say struggling until he lets me go. I walk over to my desk were Alice is sitting alone looking scared. I grab my bag. "I'm sorry." Alice says. I smile slightly at her. "Not your fault." I say and walk over to Banner's desk and grab the pink slip he is holding.

I stop at the door and look at him "You don't know anything." I say lowly to him and walk out to the principles office. The rest of the evening is spent in detention and in there they give me a week full of in school suspension. In other words I would spend the whole week from 8 to 3 in the basement were detention is at. Doing any school work that is needed to be given.

Peachy, fucking, perfect.

**A/N: So? What you guys think? Did you like it, hate it? I kind of like this story, I had been thinking about writing a Bella/Alice story for a while and while listening to t.A.T.u awesome band! (there not really gay but there cover made them act gay) and I got inspired.**

**This updates wont be regular seeing as my main priority is still Shadows of a Star but seeing as I have a bit of writers block with that one story I decided to give you guys a new story to take away a bit of my stress.**

**Review, Fallow, Favorite blah, fucking, blah. That's pretty much it… Oh, and I am not or have ever been a lesbian. All of this is just me winging it and imagining shit people would do if they were gay.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Here is chapter 2 of Choices! Hope you guys like it! This chapter was… interesting to write so I hope you all like it! And thanks to Wow a guest who noticed an error in my title. Owe you one.**

**It must have slipped my mind while I was so nervous to publish the first chapter. Thanks again.**

**Ch.2**

**Bpov**

I had formed a new routine, I would wake up early, run, take a shower, get dressed, eat, drive my Mercedes to school. Hang out in the parking lot preferably making out with anyone of my lay's and then I would spend the day in detention with anyone that would share the same fate and then I would go to lunch, were the Cullen's had been added permanently and make out with anyone I felt like kissing. After that I would hang out in the parking a bit more. And go home to sleep and entertain myself as best I could.

Little to say that whole week was a bore of nothing but sleepiness. It was lunch on Friday the only time I was allowed out of the basement. I give a soft smile to Jessica who was still a bit hurt by my out burst and I really didn't care. I had enough girls and guys to last me until I left for College. In another year and a half, but I knew Jessica would cave after I did me my sorry bit.

At the current moment I am making out with Heidi, quite heavily. Pinning her against a locker gruffly and kissing her neck the way I know she loved. To define Heidi is simple, she is temptation on two legs. The embody meant of lust, that is what Heidi is. I would just only need to stare at her for a moment before she creeped off teasing me, taunting me to go after her and do oh, so many things to her.

I was in the middle of letting her finish up kissing my neck when I hear a thump and a whimper, not coming from Heidi. I pull Heidi away from me and look in her eyes and grin "Get something to eat, ill find you later." I say pecking her lips. She rolls her eyes, pecks me and leaves. I grow a bit when I see her hips sway so temptingly but I hear the crash again and a laugh.

I was making my way to the sound when I heard the voice of Victoria, Irina but there was no Tanya. I frown and lean on the lockers looking at what there doing only to see a short girl, maybe a head shorter than me. She's pinned against the locker and Victoria and Irina are hovering over her. I finally spot Tanya, she's holding the girl, her arm on her arm. I growl to myself when I see the face of the short girl.

Alice, they're messing with Alice and I don't know why that got me so mad but it did. Before I can think straight im walking quickly over to them. "What do you have here bimbo's?" I ask coolly. All four heads snap to me and I stop in front of them. "Nothing that includes you Bella. Move along." Tanya says and I smirk, "Everything includes me." I say.

Tanya sighs and smiles an ugly fake smile at me "Nothing, were just getting to know little Alice here." she says running a hand through Alice's short hair. I don't know why that pissed me off so much. I raise an eyebrow trying to maintain my cool "That so?" I ask. No one answers and before they can register I have maneuvered between the three girls and Alice. I grab Tanya's hand in mine and pull her close to me until our faces are an inch apart.

"Don't fuck with me Tanya, leave Alice alone. Understand me? if you don't you will answer to me." I spit out and push her so that she knocks in to Victoria and Irina. "All of you will stay away, I don't want to catch you three in a six-foot radius of Alice. Understand?" I growl.

Victoria smirks "Why do you care? It's not like she's any use to you, what? Your going to play her for a while then dump her?" she asks. I growl and smirk at her "No, that was just reserved for you, darling." I say with a wink. She growls at me and I smile "what? You though I mean it when I said I love you? haha, or you two? Please, I played you three better than a damn guitar. You were just that, games. In which I won." I say smirking.

All three of the girls are glaring at me but they all know that if it becomes physical I will win. They out number me but neither three of them have ever fought… I have, on multiple occasions. "Now, get out of here before I decide I need a stress releaser." I spit. The all scoff at the same time and walk down the hall to the cantina.

I turn to look at Alice who is looking at the ground. "You ok?" I ask softly. She nods but doesn't look at me "Hey, Alice. Look at me." I plead. She looks at me and I offer her a small smile "Did they hurt you?" I ask. She shakes her head but her eyes are still in a frown… I wish I knew why though.

I nod once, "What did the say to you… if they weren't physical." I say. She sighs "Nothing, just stupid things about myself and how I wouldn't fit in and stuff." She says lowly. I chuckle slightly "Not to worry, you fit in great. I'm sorry… I am sorry I couldn't keep them off you before. I was in detention and I didn't see them after school or in detention to be able to scare them." I say softly. I offer her a small smile and she smiles back.

"Don't worry. I'm fine." She says waving a hand in the air. I grab her arm and look at her wrist closely. It had red lines on it and it was starting to bruise and swell, someone was holding her really hard. I frown "they did this?" I ask touching it lightly. She winces, hesitates before nodding once. I gulp back the vial in my through "Don't worry… ill fix it." I say and before she can protest I escort her to the lunch room. My hand on the small of her back, keeping her in my sight.

I ignore everyone and walk her over to the fruit bar were the fruit is over ice. I grab some of the ice from there and take my bandana out of my pocket. I wrap it around the ice and place it on her wrist. She looks at me questioningly "it's going to swell and its going to hurt. Just keep it in ice and it wont hurt or swell that much." I say leading her to my table.

I'm actually glad to say that my table for once is almost empty except for Seth, Jacob, Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper and Leah. I sit her down next to me and notice how Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett notice that she has her arm in ice. "What happened to her?" Emmett asks. Rosalie looks sad and livid. Jasper looks deep in though. I shake my head "The bimbo squad wanted a play toy." I mumble. Jacob, Seth and Leah hiss. "They did not do that." Seth says in shock. I nod once glaring at their table which sits across the lunch room. Leah growls "That is not cool." She says. And Jake is just pissed.

"Who the fuck are the bimbo squad?" Rosalie asks angrily. I smile slightly "The idiot girls that I dated who now think they hate my guts, because I wont make them anything more than a hook up. And because of that, they seek out any person they can to turn against me, it looks like they were trying to intimidate Alice in to joining but I got there." I say with a shrug.

Rosalie stand "take me to them." She says. I laugh "Sit down, Rose. I handled the first part ill handle the second." I say shrugging. "Look, they hurt my sister, I don't care if you are all-powerful in this school but no one messes with my family." She snaps at me. I look over to her and shake my head a bit.

"You should care, your new. The principal doesn't have a soft spot for new kids, understand? You can't exactly just go over and knock them out, trust me ok? I have it under control." I say leaning back in my chair taking a few chips and eating them slowly.

Rosalie looks in between agreeing with me, hitting me or hitting everyone. Emmett seems to make up her mind as he sighs "Sit down Rosie, Bella knows what she's doing." He sighs. Rosalie scowls at me and goes to sit on the other side of Alice checking her hand. I sigh and scratch my neck "I'll deal with them." I say as I stand and walk over to their table.

"What do you want?" Irina asks. I grin and wink at her "Nothing." I say smiling. Tanya looks back at me "really?" she asks. I nod and smile and sit down. "What do you want Bella?" Victoria asks.

I sigh and run a hand through my hair "I just wanted to say that… I miss you. I need you back in my life Victoria. Forget about Tanya and Irina, we both know they never meant anything to me. It was you, it was always you." I say, my eyes smoldering in to her green ones.

She has a smile on her face and Tanya and Irina are glaring at her "You don't really mean that do you?" Tanya asks. I sigh and look at her "Tanya, don't you miss me at all? I've missed you… the way you whisper my name while you sleep… baby come on. You still want me in your life." I say to her softly, stroking the hand on the table. Her eyes are smoldering in to mine and Irina clears her though.

I look at her and place a hand over her fisted ones, she tenses than relaxes and I scoot a bit closer to her. "Irina…" I whisper my eyes playing with hers. She grins at me and I pull back shake my head "You girls need to stop this idiocy, I have just reminding you that your all still in love with me. And shit, we can make these arrangements work out. No one but you three seem to have a problem with me sleeping around." I say with a smirk.

Victoria's face falls and I wink at her and she smiles a bit. "Because we want you all to our selves." She purrs. I grin "And so does this school… what's the difference if I still make all of you feel good. There's enough of me to go around, honey." I say to her. She's to fucking dumb and nods a bit.

I look at all three of them and smile all through my speech. "Look here, girls. If you mess with Alice again I swear to God I will never touch any of you again. And you wont see it coming and you wont know when but trust me, I will find my way to make you regret messing with her. She's new, she is easily intimidated. I'm not and I will crush you." I say still holding Victoria's and Tanya's hands "I don't want to lovely's… but if needed, I will defend Alice… understood?" I ask still smiling.

The three girls are staring at me in shock and lust. I can see a bit of fear in their eyes. I stand and lean over the table to whisper to them, my grin still in place "I wont go easy on you girls twice. And I wont stop until there is nothing of you left to crush. The same way I wont stop until each and every one of you cum's. Now, you decide whether to feel pain or bliss." I say still smiling. I throw them a wink, they all nod and I nod once. "Good, talk. Now smile, if we can get an arrange meant we can have a really good time." I say with a smile as I wait for them to smile.

They all manage week smiles and I shrug and turn to walk away. I stop when im face to face with Heidi, and I grin.

"Heidi." I say with a grin. She smiles seductively at me and I must admit, she can pull that look off. Were standing in the middle of the lunch room and she hooks her thumbs on the loops of my jeans and pulls me to her, I grin at her. I love that were almost the same height, I'm half an inch taller. I walk her to our table and sit her on my lap ignoring the table for the moment.

"Missed me?" I ask with a raised eyebrow. She moans a laugh and shit, its hot. She leans over until her mouth grazes my ear "Craving you." she whispers. I shudder once and wrap my arm around her waist. "Shit." I say lowly to her. She grind a bit against me and I bite my lip "Don't start anything you can't finish, Heidi." I warn.

She grins at me, and leans over to me again, her chest to mine "Who said I wouldn't finish?" she asks. I smirk and lean forward until our lips are almost touching. "Is that a promise?" I whisper against her lips. She nods and she kisses me, I not my hand in her hair and a hand on her waist keeping her from turning this more XXX then it already is.

She moans in to my mouth and grinds on me once, I pull away first "Fuck, Heidi. Why don't you try to get in a bit of trouble? I'm all alone in detention… you can finish promising me there." I say capturing her lips in mine once more. She moans in to my mouth and I pull away with a smirk "I'll see you latter." I say and with a sigh, she places a peace of her long black hair behind her ear, kisses my neck a few times and she leaves my lap and walks out of the lunch room.

I run a hand through my hair and even out my breathing, "Fuck." I grunt leaning my head back, when I see her hips sway. "Finally." Leah sighs. I turn to face the table Jake high fives me and Leah growls at me. I pout "what?" I ask. She shakes her head "Heidi?" she asks in disgust. I grin "Yes..?" I ask. She shakes her head "Did you threaten them?" she asks, changing the subject. I nod, Seth speaks "You couldn't even tell you were threatening them. It looked more like a triple conquest." he says. I nod and grin "Well duh. I had to make them remember they were in love with me." I state.

"You threatened them?" Rosalie asks incredulously. I nod "Yup." I say taking a fry from Leah's plate. "It looked like you were talking to your girlfriends." Rosalie says. I nod and smirk "I know, if I threatened them people would believe it. So I need to make it look like were having a nice friendly chat, smiles and laughs and all. Witnesses." I say with a shrug as I open my mouth and Leah who is bugging me feeds me a fry. I grin at her and Rosalie scoffs "How many people are you dating Bella?" she asks.

I frown and gulp down the fry "None." I say looking at her. She looks at Leah then at me, then over my shoulder were Heidi just exited. I grin "I have dated a lot of people Rose, lets just say I made more then half the school bi curious." I say grinning. Leah laughs "In plain terms. Bella is a player… for both sides." She ads. I smirk and eat more of her fries, fuck I love when she feeds me.

Rosalie raises an eyebrow at me and looks me up and down. "Like what you see beautiful?" I ask. She smiles but shakes her head, I laugh. "Don't worry Rose, though you are hot I think lover boy wouldn't like it that much if we got together." I joke with a wink.

Emmett places a hand around her chair and I grin, chuckling. "You really are a player?" Rose asks. I think for a moment and nod as I take a fry from Leah. "You though we were joking the first day you were here? Jake told you this, im surprised you didn't believe him." I say. Jake laughs "You do look all innocent Bella, but then again they have been sitting here a week and almost every day you have a new person on your lap. So… I don't know why people doubt me." he sighs. I laugh softly at his craziness'. Leah sighs and grabs my face in her hands "How can people fall for this girl I will never know." She says.

I pull away and blow her a kiss and grin "Because im adorable, awesome, cool, great in bed, funny, rich, live alone, layer back and oh most of all incredibly good-looking." I say. Leah pats my head "As long as you don't get a big head." She says sarcastically. I pull away from her and stand "enough, picking on Bella. I'm heading out for a smoke… and for some Heidi, don't make my ears ring too much while im away, honey." I say grinning at her.

Leah sighs "Like I would ever fall for that cheesy grin of yours." She says. I shrug "One day… one day I will get you all for myself." I swear full heartedly, my eyes burning in to hers. She rolls her eyes to avoid contact "Sure, the day after never." She says. I frown and grin "That's what you say now, ill make you cave." I say and lean in to whisper to the table. "And one day, ill make you scream my name in ecstasy like so many others." I say to her with a wink.

Leah gasps at me and the table is quiet watching us. She goes for a slap but I hold her hand and pull her up and close to me. "You know you want me." I say my face an inch away from hers. She frowns and I lean forward to try and kiss her but she cups my cheeks "I do, I want you dead." She vows. I smirk "God, you're so aggressive. Wonder how that will transpire in bed." I ad with a smirk.

She gaps at me again and I go to kiss her but she gives me her cheek. "Tease." I say to her ear and step back. "I'll make you mine, Leah. I wont stop until I hear my name in moans coming from your pretty little mouth." I say to her. She rolls her eyes "The only way your name escapes my mouth is with a curse word." She says. I grin "So do the others, I love dirty talk." I ad with a smirk.

She gaps at me "Don't fight me so hard, Leah. We all know you want me… maybe even more then I wan your V card." I add with a wink as I walk out of the room with a laugh. "Fuck you!." she yells at me. "that's all I ever want to do to you." I call over my shoulder as I walk out of the back doors to the pick nick tables.

I'm not a bit shocked to find Heidi sitting on a bench smoking alone. I walk over to her and stand in between her lets "Took you long enough." She says blowing out smoke. I smirk a bit "Lost track of time, is there anyway to make up for it?" I ask running a hand on her thighs. She nods and motions with one finger for me to come closer.

My lips are almost grazing hers and she blows the smoke out and I suck it in to my mouth… she's not smoking cigarettes I could tell from the smell, its weed. I hold it in a bit before letting it go, she pulls back and takes another pull from her blunt.

I pull her close to me and kiss her lips until they part and give me the sweet smoke. I hold it in and release it when I move to place kisses on her neck. Soon enough the blunt is stumped and were in the woods making out. I can't take it anymore and start to cup her over her shirt when I hear twigs snap behind us.

I look behind me to see the cop from our school and I curse before leaning my head on her shoulder. I mumble lowly in to her ear "Sneaky little, girl. Ill have to punish you for this latter." I remind her lowly. She giggles "That's what im hoping for." She says and I pull away from her with a grin as we walk back to the school and in to the principles office were he extends my detention to another hour after school is done.

Heidi also has an hour detention after school and then we can both leave to the basement were we are alone the rest of the afternoon. The joy's of fucking life.

**A/N: Well, what you guys think? Don't worry Heidi is Bella's fave because she knows that she's not hopping for anything permanent. Hope you guys like it.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hello people! If your following me on the exact same day as I published this story aka right now, you can see that I'm a bit crazy publishing the first couple of chapters but it's because I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooo bored! So, here is chapter 3 and I hope you guys like it, oh and it's Alice for a change ;) have fun.**

**I do not own TWILIGHT SAGA! - who agrees that the word "twilight' looks bad freaking ass? It looks epic!... and yes! I am hipper because I drank coffee! –o- and it's changing my craziness' in to some random shit. haha xD Read, Review, Fave and Fallow!**

**Ch.3**

**Alice pov**

I watch as Bella walks out of the lunch room swaying her hips lightly. I giggle softly and look back at Leah who looks frazzled. Rosalie grins. "You sure you're not falling for that grin?" she asks. Leah snaps out of it and sighs. "I would, if she wasn't such a damn player." She says with a frown. Rose frowns. "You like her?" she asks. Leah ducks her head a bit and shrugs. "I… I always have but, she's not like this. Normally she's really cool but… she's a player… she wasn't kidding when she told you that. She knows it and she's proud of it." Leah says. I frown, how can anyone be proud of being a player?

Jacob sighs. "Forgive Bella, really. She's really cool but she just… doesn't have anything to lose, she's been hurt and whether or not she inflicts a similar pain intentionally or not I do not know. I think she just sleeps around a lot to find stability but when she feel that she's getting attached she freaks and dumps them. Boy or girl, but she has that charm about her… I imagine you all know it. People just don't mind as long as they know she will eventually go back for a bit of time." He explains. I nod deep in though, Bella is a really complex person.

First she consoles me, then teases me in the class room, defends me and then acts like it was nothing. I clear my though. "So, was she always like this?" I ask. They all look at me curiously. I smile. "I mean, was she always a player?" I ask. Jake shrugs. "She was but, not to this extent. She's gotten a bit out of hand after last year." He says. And Seth, Leah and him stay quiet for a moment.

"Wait… didn't she move here last year?" I ask. They frown and shake their heads. "She moved here around two years ago." He says. I nod deep in though 'I moved here around a year ago' practically the same thing. I roll my eyes at myself. Already doubting the girl that I owe a huge favor two.

Emmett beats me to my next question. "What happened to her?" he asks. Jake sighs. "it's her story, I wish I could tell you but… it's not ours to tell." He says. I nod in understanding. "Don't worry about it." I say. I can't help but feel sad, I want to know what the real her is like, Bella seems all fun and energetic but I wonder what causes her to be so… well such a player.

I spend the last three classes deep in though as I try to solve the enigma that is Bella Swan. I know she's a player, I can see it. All this week I have sat down at her table and notice there is always a girl around her flirting or kissing with Bella. I think she prefers girls than boys because I haven't seen a guy around her in the week I have been in school.

I get a text from Rose, Em, Jazz and Edward that they can't wait for me after school seeing as I have to do some extra homework in the school library for my history class. I tell them it's ok and stay a full hour after school doing research. I walk out of the library with a bunch of books and walk over to my locker to grab my coat when I see that it's wide open. I rush to it only to find that it has scraps of cloth at the bottom. I place the books down on the floor and grab at the cloths until I can tell it's my sweater.

It's cut to pieces, the thin white fabric in clumps at the bottom of my locker. I grab it angrily and throw it in the trash can next to my locker. Once I make sure that was the only thing destroyed which it was, along side a note that read.

'She will tire of you, and when she does we will be waiting. She's ours and that won't change.' ~T.~I.~V. I frown and clump the note before throwing it to the trash can. I slam the locker shut and grab my books from the floor, I grab them and walk over to the corner quickly only to bump in to a hard wall of flesh. I try to grab anything as to not fall and manage to grab the shirt only to pull the person down with me.

My back hit's the floor with a thud and I hear a smacking sound. I open my eyes quickly to see brown eyes looking in to mine only a few centimeters away. The person pulls back a bit only to see that it's Bella looking at me intently. Her arms are next to my head as if she was doing a push up "Are you ok?" she asks her breath so close to my face I can smell the peppermint.

I nod mutely and her eyes scan over my face carefully until they stop at my lips. She licks her own lips, oh, shit. _yes! Kiss me. what? Wait, no don't kiss me…shit!_ My mind is so scrambled right now. Bella seems to come closer before she pauses, her eyes look at mine again before she pushes of the ground and lands on her knees next to me. She gets up quickly and looks down at me on the floor.

She grins. "You sure your ok?" she asks offering me a hand. I take it and she pulls me up with her strong arms. I wonder if she play's sports? I'm lost in my though when I crash in to her again and about to fall back when she puts an arm around my waist and pulls me flush against her. She smirks when I look up at her.

"You seem dizzy." She states. I shake my head and she lets her arm fall and I step back. "Um, sorry for bumping in to you… twice." I say kneeling on the floor only to be beaten by Bella who is already holding my books for me. "Not a big deal. Why are you here after hours?" she asks. I stand slowly along with her and answer. "I was dong some research at the school library for my history class." I say.

Bella bites her lip and nods. "Mrs. Peach is a bitch." She nods. I giggle. "I didn't say anything." I say. She nods and smirks. "Didn't have to." She says with that smirk looking down at my from her bangs. I don't know whether to wipe it off her smirk or smile back. She motions for me to walk and I do so, her trailing behind me for a moment before walking next to me.

We walk in silence. "So, Bella. Why were you here after hours?" I say when we reach the doors. She smirks again. "When there are only two people in detention… you lose track time." She says. I gap at her and she laughs softly, I find my self cherishing her laugh. it's pure and whole hearted, nothing like I have heard in the lunch room or in the class room a week ago.

I shaky my head and walk out the door to see it's pouring. Bella stays at the door and looks behind her for a moment, "I'll be right back, I need to check something ok?" she asks. I nod and she flashes me a quick smile before jogging down the hall. I shake my head at this girl. She's so odd, everything she says or does is because of a reason. She's guarded I can tell, anyone can. But, there's a reason for that… and I don't know what that reason is.

I frown and try to wait out the rain and Bella. She hasn't walked back out for ten minutes. The rain if anything is getting worse, I sigh and grab a plastic bag they gave me from the office and cover all my books in it and tie it up. I put the book bag on and walk in to the rain. I shiver a bit as the freezing water hit's my back and my head. I hunch a bit and continue walking.

Incredible, it's been three minutes since I started walking and I am soaking wet. I mean I'm dripping like I just took a swim, I'm about a block away from the school when head lights flash behind me and I turn to see a slick black car sitting next to me. The passenger door opens up and a voice tells me to get in. I look around, pout and get in. The door slides closed and I'm hit by a wall of warmth. I huddle in a bit and turn to see Bella glaring at me, what did I do?

"What?" I ask a bit annoyed by her mood swings. She sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose. "I told you to wait for me, why didn't you?" she asks. I look back to her and raise an eyebrow. "I did wait, for ten minutes you didn't get out so I decided to walk." I say with a shrug looking out the windshield. She sighs and clicks her tongue.

"I was searching for my locker to give you this." She says and hands me a big jacket. I look at it and she sighs. "Put it on, your shivering." She states. I nod and slip it on quickly grate full for the warmth the dry material provides. Then her words sink in. "Search for your locker…? Don't you know where it is?" I ask.

She smiles a bit at me. "I have more than one." She says. My eyes go wide. "The school allows you to have more than one?" I ask. She grins "I didn't say that." She says. I roll my eyes "Of course not." I say. She chuckles and leans on her seat, the car is still running but were parked on the corner of the street. I'm absorbing the warmth of the heater gratefully.

"How many do you have?" I ask quietly. She thinks for a moment. "Four." She says. My eyes go wide. "Four?" I ask. She nods. "Yup, but Jake has six. So I'm better than him." She says with a shrug. My eyes go wider. "Six?" I ask. She nods and reaches forward and lifts my jaw that was hanging open.

"You know, you're going to catch fly's like that." She says placing her warm hand on my chin and lifting it up a bit so that my lips are closed. She slider her hand until it cups my cheek and it's so warm that I find my self leaning in to the touch. She shifts a bit in her seat, I see and she goes to lean forward but stops, shakes her head and sits back down. She runs her thumb over my jaw once and pulls her hand back.

"Sorry… you just seemed really cold." She says. I nod. "It's ok…" I say missing her touch. She clears her through. "So, where exactly do you live?" She asks shifting the gear and sliding in to the road with ease. I think for a moment. "Uh, off the high way. There's an entry about ten minutes in to the left." I say. She nods and smiles. "Off the free way, huh… seems like were neighbors." She says.

I look at her. "Really?" I ask. She nods and shrugs. "I think we are, I need to see your house first. But I'm pretty sure we are." She says. I smile a bit. "Cool." I say. She nods and looks at me quickly. "Are you cold? I can turn the heater up?" She asks. I smile but shake my head. She rolls her eyes and puts the heater even higher and aims it at me. I shiver a bit and am grateful when the warm air hit's me.

She chuckles when some of my hair falls in to my eyes "I love your hair by the way, never got a chance to tell you." She says. I smile brightly. "Thanks, I have to admit though I stole it from Julia Volkova form tatu." I admit. She grins "Ahh, I knew it was familiar. Hmm… you look a lot like her. Only your prettier." She says. I nod and duck my head. "Thanks." I say shyly.

She grins. "Anytime, Volkova." She says with a wink. I laugh at her silliness and she joins. After about five minutes She speaks. "Ok, which turn?" she asks. I look around until I find the second one on the left. "That one." I say pointing. She nods and grins "Were neighbors." She says. I grin "Which one is your house?" I ask. She looks at me quickly. "Want to see it?" she asks. I nod and she drives straight until the next entry at the left and slides in.

We drive up a winding drive way with not as much curves as ours and stops in front of this huge three-story house. I gap at it, I though our house was big. This one is my houses older brother.

It's at the least a few rooms longer and it's painted white, blue and green. She parks her car in the garage and opens the door up. I smile. "I love your car." I say getting out of it and taking my wet book bag with me. She grins. "Thanks, me two." She says and that's when I look around and find a motorcycle.

"No way this is yours." I say. I hear her walk over to me a laugh softly. "Yes, it is actually. Bought it around… two months ago. I traded it from my 2011." She says. I nod. "Emmett will die if he sees it." I say. She chuckles. "Cool… come in side, I'll find you something… dry to wear. And something warm to drink." She says and walks out of the garage and wait's for me to walk out back to the rain and closes it.

She walks behind me to the stairs and front door where we're hidden under the roof. She smiles a bit and opens the door and steps back to let me pass first. I gasp, it's beautiful. The walls are painted Black, Grey and white. And it's breath-taking beautiful.

You can see the living room, from the loft. And it's huge with big windows but not a back wall full of glass like ours. It has white furniture and it looks amazingly beautiful. The wall's are a soft grey, black and white. I hear her voice behind me. "Like it?" she asks. I look behind me to see that she's a few steps behind me. I nod and turn. "It's… amazing." I say. She smiles. "My dad wanted to decorate it bright colors but I told him it was best to go dark, he agreed and I haven't changed it since." She says.

I frown. "Where is your dad?" I ask looking around. Her head snaps up. "You don't know?" She asks. I shake my head slowly. "Hmm… I though people at school would have filled you in. Well, I actually said it on Monday… um, he passed a way last year. So, I live alone." She says taking of her coat. I follow her lead and she takes the coat from me and hangs it. "What about your mom?" I ask.

She frowns a bit, "She died when I was ten." She says and leads me up the stairs. "Oh, I'm so sorry." I say. She offers me a ghost of a smile. "Me two." She says softly. We're quiet until she reaches the second floor, "Um, well this is just like another living room practically. It was originally two rooms but I had them knocked down to have this open space where the piano is." She points to it. I nod and smile. "You play?" I ask. She nods, I smile. "Edward plays piano two, I only know a few songs." I say with a shrug.

She smiles at me. "I would like to see that some time." She says and I laugh." And this over here is the study, there's really no use for it anymore but I didn't have the heart to get rid of it." She says pointing to the door but not opening it. I nod and she leads me to the third floor. "Here are the guest rooms and the master suite." She says. I nod and she leads me to what I believe is the master suite. "My father hated it, so he gave it to me when we moved here… he mostly fell asleep in the room connected to the study." She says with a hint of a smile.

I smile and nod. She clears her though and looks back at me. "I don't normally speak about my father… I wonder why I keep mentioning him around you." She murmurs. I frown a bit. "I-I'm sorry. I don't want to make you feel" I am cut off by her hand on my mouth. "Don't worry about it… now. To get you some dry clothes, you're shaking. And your going to get sick if you stay like that." She says and walks over to the closet.

She looks around for a while and then comes back with some clothes. "I don't know if these will fit… they are form a girl I used to date. She never really came to pick up her stuff and I didn't want to throw it out. She was about your same height so I hope they fit, if the don't just come back and ill give you something else." She says to me. I smile and nod.

She leaves the room to let me get changed and I peel off my soaking wet clothes and am grateful when the shirt Bella gave me is baggy enough I can wear it without a bra without it noticing. I pull on the panties and yoga sweets and smile when they are a bit bigger then me. I curl it up once and it fit's perfectly. I look around and find a towel next to the clothes and I use it to dry my hair a bit.

After I'm done I grab my wet clothes and book bag just as Bella knocks on the door. "Decent?" she asks. I can hear the smirk in her voice I laugh. "Yeah." I call and she opens the door. "Darn, I though you would be naked." She says grinning at me. it's playful but something in her tone makes me believe it has happened before.

I raise an eyebrow. "Girls have done that before?" I ask. She grins. "Sometimes, when I wont sleep with them they get… creative. Especially the bimbo squad" She says with a smirk. I roll my eyes. "Your worst then a guy." I say and she frowns playfully. "I guy would have given you their own clothes and imagined a lot of bad things while they saw you in them." She says with a victory grin.

I shrug. "Would never know, I've never really dated a guy." I say. It's the truth, I have never been attracted to men, only women and I have only ever had one girl friend and her name was Gina and it was when we were in Chicago. Bella's eyebrow knit together, "No guy ever asked you out?" she asks as if it was shock inducing.

I shake my head. "They did… but I turned them down." I say watching her carefully. She frowns. "Why would you…wait… your not telling me your… you're a lesbian?" She asks. I nod and she gulps and looks at me before her eyes travel down my body slowly and snaps her eyes back to mine nodding once. I smirk this time. "Shocked?" I ask.

She looks back from out the window and nods quickly. "Very… I mean. You don't seem… ah, I mean. Um, you don't pay attention to any of the girls in school… I would notice." She says giving me a look from the corner of her eye and grinning.

I smirk and laugh a bit. "I have, there's nothing really obvious to see which one's are rooting for which team." I say. Bella laughs softly and smirks. "Oh, trust me. You'll notice." She say's looking at my and licking her lips before looking out the window. I laugh. "So, I just need to wait for you to make out with every gay girl in school before I can pick my favorite?" I ask jokingly. Bella laughs and shrugs but her eyes shine with playfulness.

She turns to smile at me. "Duh, you can't steal my girls. You know how long it took me to get half the girls to even know if the were bi curious let alone gay?" she asks. I grin. "Better yet. You did all the hard work and I just need to hop in." I say laughing. She joins my laughter. "Your crazy." She says after we stop laughing.

I shrug. "Your not exactly sane." I say back. She grins and I can see a deeper playfulness in her eyes. "You think that now, you should see some of the girls in school, they make me look like an angel… well no, they just don't know I'm a devil." She challenges with a smirk. I grin. "I'll have to check that out." I mumble playfully. She rolls her eyes "When ever you want, babe." She says a hint of seriousness in her tone, my muscles clench a bit.

Then she thinks for a moment "You can have any girl…as long as you leave Leah to me, still don't know how she can resist me." she mumbles. I laugh "and what if Leah wants me?" I ask jokingly. She grins and looks me up and down before smirking "Your allowed to join us any day." She says and I cant help but laugh, then she notices my soaking clothes in my hands.

"Oh, right. I came here to grab those clothes to put them in the dryer. Did you put your books in a plastic bag?" She asks. I nod and she grins. "The office is mandated to give them to students. Let me grab that and I'll give you something to drink." She offers walking over to me and grabbing the wet clothes before walking out of the room. I follow her to the second floor and to the last room in the hall were the washing machines and dryer are at.

She takes my books out of my book bag and my stuff and she places the clothes in the dryer with a dryer sheet. She starts it up and walks over to me and smirks when she towers over me. "Your so short." She mumbles amused. I huff "Not my fault your freakishly tall." I say. She laughs full heartedly "I'm 5'6, I'm considered average tall. But your what? 4'9?" she asks. I roll my eyes. "I'm 5'2." I say. She grins. "Your are not 5'2." She says.

I pout. "Fine, I'm 5'1" I admit. She smiles down at me "Your kind adorable." She says looking in my eyes and then slips out of the room and continues to walk. I freeze for a moment my heart thudding like crazy. I see her walk and fallow behind her. Until were on the first floor and she leads me to the kitchen. it's huge and amazing. Black and silver stainless steel appliances and a deep brownish red color for the wooden cabinets. She hands me a land line "You should call your house, don't want them thinking you got lost." She says.

I nod and Bella stops me. "Um, you should tell them ill take you home later tonight… That storm doesn't look good." She says looking out the window. I nod thoughtfully and dial the house number. Esme picks up on the second ring.

"Hello?" she asks. "Hey mom." I say. She sighs. "Mary Alice Brandon Cullen." She growls. I gulp, oh shit! I am in trouble "I have been worried sick! School ended an hour and a half ago and your brothers and sister came home without you. Where are you?" she asks. I sigh "I was looking for some books for my history class and it got late. I'm at a friend's house, she gave me a ride but I wanted to see her house and now the storm got bad so she said she will take me home latter when it calms down a bit." I say.

She sighs bit it's a happy one and or a less mad one. "Alright, Alice. Behave and be careful. Oh, and next time. Call me, I can pick you up." She says. I roll my eyes. "Sure thing, Mom." I say. "Love you, darling." She says. I smile. "Love you two, mom." I say and hang up.

I walk back in to the kitchen to see Bella with two cups of hot chocolate on the counter and a bowl of mini marshmallows. I sat down on the stool and she offers me a small smile. "I.. I don't know how you take your hot chocolate so I kept it plain." She says bringing her cup to her mouth and taking a small sip. I smile at her in thanks "Thanks and don't worry. I drink it fine with anything." I say.

She nods once and I take some of the marshmallows and add them to my cup. She smiles a bit to her self but it's covered by the cup so I cant be sure. "Um, so. Have the girls given you anymore trouble?" She asks. I smile and shake my head, no need to worry her about those god awful girls.

She nods. "So, tell me about your self Alice. I don't know anything about you other than, your not patient, your short, have a lot of siblings, your dads a doctor, you live down he street, you're gay and that your great at drawing dresses." She says. I look at her in shock. Has she gathered all this in the two times this week she has talked to me? She had to be. The other days in between Monday and Today Friday, she has been lip locking all lunch.

I shift and shrug "I don't know that much about you either." I challenge back. She smirks. "No? I think you know more about me then I know about you." she says. I raise an eyebrow and she grins. "All I know about you, Bella. Is that you live alone, your bi sexual, your parents passed away, you're rich, have great taste in car's and most importantly you're a player." I say.

She smiles and licks her lips while she looks at her cup of chocolate. "Precisely, you know exactly the amount of things as the rest of this town. The things, you should know." She says looking at me from under her lashes as she's taking a drink of her cup. My eyebrows knit together. "That's all anyone knows about you?" I ask. She smiles. "Yep, and I plan to keep it that way until I'm 18 and can move around without my guardian getting on my nerves." She says.

I raise an eyebrow. "You have a guardian?" I ask. She rolls her eyes. "Yes, darling. I have a guardian. If I didn't I would be in foster care, he's never around except once every month for the visit's of those people Sometimes I change the meetings and he stays away for months at a time." She says. I nod but I scowl my self for my heart racing when she called me 'darling'.

"W-well.." I clear my though. "What do you want to know?" I ask eyebrow raised. She shrugs. "Anything you are willing to tell me." She says. And I think my heart speeds up a bit, she's so sweet. I examine her eyes for a moment and see that there only looking at my face, I smile a bit. Then a voice in my head screams 'Idiot! She's a player! She knows how to play you! she's had more than enough practice' I frown a bit and she notices.

"Everything ok?" she asks. I nod and shake my head to clear it. "Yeah, just got lost in though for a moment." I lie smoothly. She nods but her eyes focused on mine. "Your lying, but I don't know why… Ill let you off the hook for this one." She says the end with a smirk.

I laugh softly, "Deal." I say with a smile. She looks out the window for a moment and clicks her tongue. "That does not look good." She says shaking her head. I look out to see the pitch black night. I nod, she sighs and runs a hand through her hair. "Want to go to the living room? We can talk more comfortably." She says with a shrug. I smile and nod. She grabs my cup and hers and walks with me to the living room and places them on the coffee table and walks over to the fire-place and pushes a button and It lights.

She kneels down and places three paces of wood in it and wait's for them to catch steady flame and un clicks the button. I cock my head to the side. "You have a gas and wood fire-place?" I ask. She turns to look at me and smiles. "Yeah… I just like the sound of cracking wood in a fire so I had this one custom build to fit my fire-place. The gas stays until the wood catches fire and then I push the button and the gas closes and I am left with a wood fire." She says with a shrug as she sits down on the other end of the couch.

She turns so that her back is to the arm of the couch and her front is facing me. I mimic her and she leans forward and my breathing stops. Her eyes connected with mine, she leans so close I can smell her perfume. I close my eyes for a moment to catch my breath and when I open them, my eyes meet hers. She's so close I can taste her peppermint breath on my lips.

**A/N: Don't you all just love a good cliffhanger? I know I don't, if you do your crazy xD I'll update again in a few minutes. Need to check over some flaw's in the story, I only have written until Ch.4 but if were lucky ill write and update until chapter 5 maybe even 6 But you all have to be really nice and Review! Fallow, Favorite and Chocolate.**

**What? Who does not like chocolate? Pffft! xD bye, see you in a few ;P**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Don't kill me, im updating! *grin* don't like the cliffhanger? REVIEW! And ill make sure never to do a cliffhanger again. Agreed? Awesome.**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT, BUT MY MILK SHAKES BRING ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD! x D you guys can tell im fucking crazy right? Good.**

**Ch.4**

**A pov**

_She turns so that her back is to the arm of the couch and her front is facing me. I mimic her and she leans forward and my breathing stops. Her eyes connected with mine, she leans so close I can smell her perfume. I close my eyes for a moment to catch my breath and when I open them, my eyes meet hers. She's so close I can taste her peppermint breath on my lips._

She leans really close to me but then pulls back. I frown for a moment until I see her hand. She was looking for her mug, she wasn't going to kiss me. I'm glad and disappointed at the same time… do I want her to kiss me? Do I even freaking like her?

Well no, that's a stupid question. She's hot, funny, smart and mysterious. Of course I'm drawn to her but do I really like her?... I don't know. I have barely talked to the girl to even know if she's my type. When I look back up at her, her eyes are shining with something… amusement maybe?

"What's so funny?" I ask. She grins. "Nothing. It was just interesting watching you lost in though… care to share what you were thinking about?" She asks. I smile and run a hand through my short damp hair. "Y-yeah… I was just wondering what my mother made for dinner." I say with a wave of my hand. Her eyebrows furrow. "Um, are you hungry? There's plenty to eat in the kitchen?" She offers. I smile and shake my head. "I'm good with the hot chocolate." I say and as to prove my point I grab my mug and take a long and slow drink.

When I pull the cup away I lick my lips and she that her eyes flash from my face and zero in on my lips. Self consciously I lick my lips again only to see her eyes shine a bit more with the fire. She sits up and leans forward, I gulp and she inches closer to me. Shit, is she going to kiss me now?

Her eyes furrow and with a soft gentle hand she cups my chin to look at her. Her eyes flash from my eyes to my lips and there is a look of concentration on her face. I'm looking back at her, my eyes on her eyes, she offers me a soft smile and her thumb brushes across my lower lip once.

Then she sends me a wink and releases my chin from her warm electric hand. I still feel the tingle all through my head blurring my thoughts. She pulls her thumb to her lips and appears to suck something off and smiles a bit at me, "You, um. Had a bit of marshmallow on your lip." She says. I frown and lick my lips, her eyes fallow my lips and she gulps and tears her gaze away from mine and look at the fire. "Um." She clears her throat. "So, w-where did you move here from?" She asks looking back at me.

I cock my head to the side yet again. Is she nervous? I grin a bit and answer her. "Chicago. My dad is ex military doctor so he moves a lot from hospital to hospital." I say with a shrug. She nods. "Marines?" she asks. I look at her for a moment before nodding once, she grins. "How did you…?" I ask. She looks at me. "You were wearing the Aviator pin on Wednesday." She says.

I frown "The Aviator pin?" I ask. She looks at me laughs and pulls the neck of her shirt down until I can see her shoulder-blade and she turns pointing at it. "I noticed that you were wearing the pin." She says. I nod recognizing the wings and the Anchor, but… hers had a few of what looked like blood on the wings. "Yeah… it's my dad's, he gave it to me." I say.

She pulls her shirt up again and faces me with a bit of a smile. "My dad had it two, he was buried with his blood wing so I made it in to a tattoo." She says with a shrug. I frown. "Blood wings?" I ask and she laughs. "For being a Marines daughter you sure don't know a lot of their traditions." She says with a shake of her head. I shrug. "I just… we don't talk about his times in the army… but still. What are blood wings?" I ask.

She takes a drink of her cup and finishes it, then licks her lips. "When a Marine graduates Airborne school in the Marines air force… and have done around 10 to 15 or 20 jumps and fought in combat, they give them the golden wings. In their type of goodbye or discharge, then they place the pin on their chest and then the person who placed it slams it in to their chest around…. Lets say 10 to 15 times depending on how many marines are there. Each one has to walk up and either 'fix' the pin or punch the pin in to the skin and muscle. It symbolizes a brotherhood." She explains to me.

I'm appalled but… interested. "H-how do you know that?" I asks. She rolls her eyes. "Haven't you ever notices your dads chest? Is left side preferably? Check it out then tell me. Then again it all depends on the type of ceremony it was. But im pretty sure he has at least a hint of a scar there were the pin was pushed in. If not then he just earned his wings, not his blood wings." She says.

I frown and try to think back but… I've never notices anything. She sighs. "Don't worry about it, maybe it was a short ceremony and it didn't leave a scar… it happens and trust me, your dad is an honorable man." She says. I nod and smile then grin.

"You do know that now I know more about you then the rest of the town." I say. She coughs a bit in realization. "Shit." I hear her say lowly. I frown. "Hey…. Don't worry I won't tell anyone." I say softly. She searches my face for a long moment. "I… I guess I know why though… I think you're the first person to ever enter my house alone who hasn't jumped my bones." She says with a smirk.

I laugh and hear her low voice. "Wonder why that is…" She mumbles. I look at her but this time I just check her out. She's good-looking and its tempting but… she's a player. I don't want to be another game. I stare in her eyes and see there's an internal battle in them. "Hey." I say lowly. She surprises me by jumping a bit "Um.. yeah?" she asks.

I smile as softly as I can "I wont tell anyone… your secret is safe with me." I say. She grins and extends her hand to grab mine but she stops her self. And runs said hand through her hair instead. She looks out the window and sighs a bit "The rain stopped… want me to take you home before it starts up again?" she asks, not looking at me. I nod but she can't see. "Yeah.." I say and try to fight the disappointment not show in my voice.

I don't want to move, I want to stay here and talk with her. I look at my watch and my eyes go wide its six a clock. "Wow, its six. The time flew by." I say. She looks back at me and nods. "Happens a lot normally it's because the weather makes it hard to know the time." She says with a shrug. I nod and she stands. "Let me just check on your clothes. Stay here." She says and walks out of the room quickly.

I frown at her strange behavior, it is almost like she doesn't want to be in the same room with me, but wants to. I groan and run a hand through my hair, she's confusing as fuck. I think. I decide to warm my hands a bit more and move closer to the fire to examine it. I look at the few pictures on the fire-place.

There's a man a woman and a small girl all smiling and saluting at the camera. I move to the next one, a small girl with a man walking on the beach, the girl on his shoulders. The next one is a picture of the girl but she's a bit older… around 10 and I can see her eyes, she's Bella. I smile to my self and look at the picture more intently.

She's lying against the woman her back to the woman's and there both laughing. Then there's one of the man and woman… are these her parents? I move to the next one to see a man in marine uniform. I know because my father has the exact same one. Then there's a picture of a teen Bella with a bold man in a hospital bed. There both smiling to the camera and there's a birthday cake on the mans lap.

Then there's a picture of the man by himself, just grinning. I look in his eyes and am shocked to see Bella's exactly. She must have had her fathers eyes… I'm absorbed in the picture I don't hear anyone come up behind me. "That's my dad." Bella says lowly from behind me. I jump a bit and turn to look at her.

Her eyes are amused but she doesn't show it fully. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you." she says. I nod and look back at the picture. "You have his eyes." I state with a smile. I look back to see her looking at the picture. "Yeah… I guess your right." She says and then seems to remember something.

"Uh, your clothes are dry and so is your book bag. I placed everything inside of it." she says handing my the book bag. I smile in thanks with a soft nod. She nods back and takes a few steps away to turn. "Bella…" I say softly. She stops and looks at me. "How did your father die, if you don't mind my asking?" I ask softly.

She stops for a moment, contemplating but then shrugs. "He… died of cancer." She says and I stop. What a horrible way to die… pour man. God bless his soul. "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that." I say sincerely to her. She offers me a smile but it doesn't reach her eyes. "Hey, stuff happens right? We're meant to die some way or the other. I'm just glad the doctor made sure he wasn't in pain his last month." She says running a hand through her hair.

I nod but I can se that her smile vanished and is only a ghost of it, its more of a grimace really. "So, let's get you to your house before your parents flip out, no?" She asks. I hear a hint of Spanish in her 'no' and smile. "You speak Spanish?" I ask walking behind her to the door. She nods twice. "I speak six languages actually." She says. My eyes go wide as we step out from the warm house and in to the cold night. I shiver and she stops and goes back inside and walks out with a jacket and hands it to me.

I look at her and she sighs. "Put it on, it's freezing." She says. "What about yours?" I ask. She grins. "I'm naturally hot, babe." She says with a wink that makes my heart beat race. She locks her door and walks with me to the garage. Her hand on the small of my back as if expecting me to fall. She opens her garage and walks me to my door and opens it for me. Pushing it up and giving me a hand to sit gently on the seat. Once im in she pulls the door down and pushes it in.

She's so polite! Is this part of her player persona or is it common curtsey? Is it because the doors are hard to handle if you're not used to the car? My head is swimming trying to find a reason for her to open the door for me. She opens her door slides in and closes the door. She turns the engine on and pulls out quickly turning on the large front yard she has. She gives me a small wink and launches out of the front yard and goes quickly down her drive way.

My hands clench to the seat and she laughs at me softly and slows down. "It's a drive way Alice. No cars are around, especially when I pull on the street. Only three people live on this side of the town." She says as she pulls out ever so slowly out of her driveway. "W-who?" I ask.

She laughs. "Dr. Green, yourself and I." She say politely as she drives down the lone road. I nod and then after what is supposed to be a five-minute drive to my house is actually a two-minute ride she drives up the sloppy curves of my driveway. She chuckles. "I hate this driveway, only reason I did not buy the house." She says. I laugh "Why do you hate it? It has character." I joke.

She laughs a low but with a hint gut in it. "I like to speed, honey. This driveway didn't exactly give me that option." She says but pretty much everything fell on deaf ears once she called me 'honey' shit, what is with the pet names? Is she trying to drive me crazy?

After five minutes we reach the house. "I thought the house was closer… hmm… then again I am used to speeding." She mumbles to herself. I smile at her ridiculousness and she stops at the corner were Edward's Volvo is at. Before I know it she is out of the car and on my side of the car opening the door for me.

I stop for a moment to gather my book bag which she takes from my hand and offers me a hand to step out. I take it and step out of the car, my hand feels an electric current run through me when she squeezes my hand and as soon as the contact is broken, its gone. She closes the passenger door and walks me to the front of the house.

She stops when we get to the steps and places my bag on the steps next to me. My mind is still a blur and I blurt out a question without thinking. "Why did you open the door for me?" I ask. As soon as its out of my mouth I want to slap my self. She just smiles at my question. "Should I not open the door for you?" she asks amused. Her eyebrows knit together. I shake my head in confusion. "No, yes. I mean… its just that people rarely open the door for one another." I say.

She nods once and sends me a grin that reaches her eyes and takes a step closer, I'm on the first step that brings me a bit taller but she's still looking down at me. She smiles softly at me and leans forward as if to kiss me and stops right next to my ear. "I'm not most people, Alice." She says so softly I can barely hear her and places a lingering kiss on my cheek.

"Goodnight." She says against my cheek, her warm breath brushing across my neck and ear. My eyes snap shut as I try to stay quiet as the shock wave of electricity runs through my body but when I open my eyes she's already getting into her car.

She pulls out and honks once before driving down until I can't even see her tail lights. I stay there a minute, gathering my bearings until I hear the door open behind me and I look up to see Rosalie standing there looking at me with an odd expression.

"You all right? You look like your about to faint." She says worried. I shake my head grab my bag from next to me and climb up the steps of the porch. "Yeah, im good. Just hungry." I say. She nods and steps back as I enter. Once the light of the room hits me she grabs my arm and looks me up and down.

"You weren't wearing that at school." She says. Shit, I look down at my clothes and nod. I'm wearing the clothes Bella gave me and her jacket. "Yeah, I was walking home and got soaked, Bella saw me and gave me a ride to her place. She gave me some dry clothes to put on." I say with a shrug. Her eyebrows furrow. "Bella? She lives five minutes up the street." She says. I nod. "I wanted to se her house." I say.

Rosalie searches my face for a long moment. "Did…anything, um. Happen?" she asks. My eyes go wide. "What? No. I just met her a week ago Rose, give me some credit." I say a bit offended. I huff and walk up the stairs to my room on the second floor and I hear her behind me until I reach my room and she sighs. "You know I didn't mean it like that, Alice." She says. I sigh and nod. "Yeah, I know." I mumble.

"Alice…" She says softly and I'm shocked. Rose is more of a tough love kind of girl so when her voice was this soft, you listen and you just take it. "Yeah..?" I ask lowly. She sighs and closes the door behind her before she hugs me and sits me down next to her on the bed. "Honey, I just… I want you to be careful with Bella. I understand that she's someone new and she's interesting and mysterious, but don't forget she's a player and only looks after her self. She might seem fine and harmless but you never know, and I don't want to se you get hurt." She says.

I sigh and snuggle in to her neck. "Yeah, I know." I say softly to her. She wraps her arms around me and squeezes me a bit "You're my little sister and I don't want anyone to play with your heart… you deserve better than that." She says. I nod "I love you, Rose." I say and she sighs and chuckles "I love you two, Alice." She says with a kiss on my head before she pulls away and smiles.

"Now, get your ass to the library, we got family homework time." She says playfully scowling at me. I grin "Eye, eye 'Capitan'." I mock and say in Spanish. She rolls her eyes and flips her long blond hair behind her shoulder "Your such an odd little pixie." She says and we both laugh as I grab my bag empty out my dry clothes and walk down to the library with Rose.

Once we get there, Rose being the slight bitch she sometimes is, grins and states. "Alice hooked up with Bella." Once she entered which caused all three boys to look at me. I blush and shake my head "I did not hook up with Bella! I just went over to her house, she gave me a ride." I defend myself.

Emmett, Edward and Jasper look at me and grin. Jasper speaks up first. "Then why aren't you wearing your clothes? I'm sure none of that is yours." He states. I huff and place my bag on the table while I take a seat. "I-I got wet in the rain because I was walking and well she picked me up and gave my dry clothes when I was at her house." I say with a shrug. Emmett laughs and Edward smirks. "You were at her house, Alice?" he says shaking his head.

I glare at my twin. "Edward your supposed to be on my side. You're my twin." I say. He smirks and shrugs. "You didn't answer my question." He states. I sigh and take my books out. "Yeah, I went over to her house. We hung out for a while then she brought me home." I say.

The guy's nod and laugh. "Sure…" They all say and I growl. I glare at Rose and she winks at me. "I'm not the gay one." She states and I huff and Emmett takes his turn to pick on me. "Alice you expect us to believe, that you went to the players house, changed clothes, hung out with her and did nothing?" He asks. I frown, I must admit that does sound a bit fake but it's what happened.

I'm about to speak but Rose steps in. "Oh, and Bella also kissed her goodnight." Rose states. I gap at her, was she spying? "You kissed her?" Emmett asks laughing. I shake my head. "She kiss my cheek. We hung out at her house and talked! Nothing more, I swear." I say with a hint of a laugh.

All my siblings just roll their eyes. "If you say so…" they say in chorus. I huff and kick Edward's shin. "Ouch, why did you kick me?" he asks sulking. "Baby." I mutter. "And I kicked you, because you are supposed to side with me in-house hold arguments, traitor." I say. He chuckles. "You know were just bugging you. We believe you when you say nothing happened, little sister." He says petting my short hair.

I slap his hand away "I'm older than you, idiot." I say with a raised eyebrow. He grins "But you're the tiniest little thing. No one will believe you." he says. I roll my eyes "Sure, sure." I say and open my books and search for a pen in my bag when my hand touches a loose piece of paper. I pull it out and se that it's a note.

I furrow my brows and open it to se need hand writing on the paper with a number 1 on it.

_'Nice underwear, Alice. But I bet they look better wile there on you…mind if I keep one? ;) ~Bella'_

I gap at the note and blush. I hide it in my hand and look at my siblings who are focused on there books. I get up quickly and run up the steps "She wouldn't." I mumble as I run in to my room and search the clothes I had on and see both pieces of underwear are there. I sigh and notice a note tucked in to the side of the bra. I take it and see a number 2 on it, I open and read it.

_'Got scared?... don't worry, ill wait until your ready to give them to me. I just wanted to point out im not like a guy… he would have jus taken it. Hope you have more like these though. But what kills me is that you didn't have a bra on all the while you were at my house…shame I didn't realize it until now. Hope you'll make it up to me ;) ~Bella'_

"Fuck." I mumble around my blush as I knot a hand through my hair. I'm confused. I'm amused, mad and a bit aroused by her damn teasing. "Shit…" I mumble when I see yet another note, this one is hanging out of the pocket to my jeans and se a number 3.

_'Don't get your panty's in a bunch it's the last note, well no. Do get your panty's in a bunch, id love to se that. But I was just going to say that your adorable, I can just imagine you blushing right now… I wonder if your cursing… hmm, do you even curse? I bet you do… you look like the type to have a bit of anger. So anyway I was just going to say that I hope you enjoyed your first week of forks high, I may not have been around but starting Monday I hope you wont mind if I'm a bit around you, im just going to make sure the bimbo's stay away from you._

_Speaking of which, you lied to me. I know they cut up your sweater and I'm sorry for that, really I am. If it's any consolation ill give you one of mine to keep? Well, I should walk down stairs to join you now, I've been gone for quiet a few minutes. I'll se you on Monday, beautiful. ~Bella_

_And if you ever need a ride call me 1-904-002-4132. Or if your ever bored.'_

I knit my eyebrows together and place the notes beside each other. The last one didn't have the wink… did she forget to add it or is that her way of saying she's serious?... damn it! She's gong to drive me crazy.

One moment she's normal, the next she's flirty, then she's serious and then back to flirty. Damn, I don't understand her but I find my self entranced thinking about her. I shake my head and place the notes under my pillow and walk back down to the library to start my homework.

I don't even know why were bothering if its Friday. "Guy's, did any of you notice its Friday… so why are we doing homework?" I ask. They all look at me and then at each other than at their watches. "Shit, she's right. I swear I though today was Thursday." Emmett says. Rose slaps the back of his head.

"Edward?" she asks. He looks up to her and she points to him "you are now in charge of family homework time ok?" she asks. He nods and Emmett pouts "Aww." He says. Jazz pats his shoulder "Bro, it's the third Friday you do this." He states. Emmett frowns "I just forgot, my phone says Thursday." He says taking it out. Jazz grabs it and pushes some buttons and fixes the calendar and laughs.

"Emmett you idiot, its 2012 not 2013" he says laughing. We all burst in to laughter at him and he frowns. "My phone is from the future?" she shouts. And we all laugh again, he's teasing us we know, he's actually pretty smart when he wants to be. I laugh so hard my sides hurt "You… you fucking… idiot." I breath out laughing.

Everyone is laughing at Emmett and he is just holding it in. That is until we hear the front door slam shut and a voice yells "Emmett McCarthy Cullen! Today is my day off!" as Carlisle walks in to the library. Were all quiet while we se him grin sheepishly "Sorry dad, my phone is from the future and was a year ahead of time." He says.

Carlisle looks at him like his an idiot and we all chuckle. "Son…did you take your pills today?" he asks. And we all erupt in to laughter, normally were the ones bugging Emmett about his crazy pills but Carlisle just flipped the switch on him. Were all laughing and Emmett and Carlisle is two.

After we all calm down he sighs. "Well since I don't have a shift today how about family movie night?" he asks. My siblings all nod and move out to the living room an I grab a hold of dads arm. He turns to look at me and I hug him, he hugs me back. "I love you, dad." I say. He hugs me a bit tighter "I love you two, Alice." He says

I pull away and smile when I se his smile. "Dad… um, did you ever get your blood wings?" I ask quietly. Dad furrows his brows and a small smile is on his lips "I did… how exactly do you know about that?" he asks. I shrug and hug him again "A friend told me about them." I say.

He nods and pulls away. "It was an honor to get them, sure I did get out of it with only a bloody shirt but… its part of the brotherhood we were in." he says softly. I nod and kiss his cheek "I know, daddy. I'm just… glad you're here." I say hugging him again. He smiles down at me "I am two…I am two." He says and with his arm around my shoulders he walks me to the living room were everyone is seated, even Esme and I let go of dad and sit down next to Jazz.

I lean on the sofa and don't even pay attention to the movie, I look out the window were the rain is hard against it… I just wonder what Bella is up two at the moment. I wonder if she's in her house watching TV… I wonder what she does in that big house all alone. I frown a bit, she must be lonely.

I wish I had asked her to come in, she could have hung out with us for a while. She could be laughing or teasing me. She cold be talking to Carlisle about Marines or something. I run a hand through my hair and sigh as I look out the window completely ignoring the movie… Bella… why can't I get you out of my head?

**A/N: What you guys think? Like it? hate it? Review? Thanks for reading! Who likes flirting Bella? And who thinks Alice is just over thinking everything with Bella? Is Bella like the rest or is she not? Review your answer and I will do my best to update the next chapter tonight, Deal?**** hand she cups my chin to look at her. Her eyes flash from my eyes to my lips and there is a look of concentration on her face. Im looking back at her, my eyes on her eyes, she offers me a soft smile and her thumb brushes across my lower lips once.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I have no idea what Marines or their history or about the Air force. All I write it about investigations I have done on Google and stuff. I don't know if Air Force is mixed with Marines. But I think they are so I united them. I Respect all soldiers and all the fallen who fought and fight for this country. My grandfather is a veteran and is one of my hero's. He fought against Korea and does not speak much of it so what I know about army is limited to what I can get my hands on.**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**

**Ch.5**

**Bpov**

The rain is soaking through my clothes but I don't move. I'm freezing, yet… I have been so much colder, then I am right now. I look down at the tombstone cross with his picture in it. I run a hand across the crown at the top of the cross and look down at the piece of stone.

_**R.I.P**_

_**Charlie M. Swan**_

'_**Chief Swan'  
1962-2011 "49"**_

**Command Chief Master Sergeant, USA Marine Air Force**

_**Beloved father, friend, brother, son, husband and Chief.**_

"_**Forever remembered by the people who loved him,**_

_**And the people he saved."**_

I read the words slowly, smiling a bit at the title he loved oh, so much. "Chief Swan." I mumble letting some of my tears fall, they mix with the raindrops. "So obsessed with the title you were even Chief for this small town…" I say shaking my head in humor.

The rain falls in my mouth and I spit it out and lick my lips "I miss you, Dad. God, I miss you so much." I say and my knees tremble and I fall on them. "You weren't supposed to leave me! it was just you and me Dad, forever. Just you and me, but… life… life had a different plan, dad. One in which, im so alone… and lost." I say bowing my head as tears fall down my face.

"I don't know how I am supposed to keep going, Dad. I'm only fucking 17. I'm a fucking kid and I have no one! No, mom, no dad. No brothers no uncles. Nothing! Please, Dad. Show me the way… I can't do this alone, not without you. Give me just one sight that your out there and that your watching over me, showing me the way." I say holding in the sobs.

After a few minutes im composed enough to stop crying and get off my knees, I don't bother wiping my face seeing as the rain is still falling on it, I run a hand through my soaked hair. I let a huff of air leave me and look down at his tomb. I look to the second piece of rock right next to my fathers.

_**R.I.P.**_

_**Renee M. Swan**_

_**1962-2005 "44"**_

_**Beloved daughter, mother and wife.**_

"_**She will be missed but remembered by**_

_**The people who loved her."**_

I breath in a sigh and look at the stone with her picture on it, "Hey, mom. I know you hate forks… but, that's were you grew up. We were in Seattle, in that small apartment when we went for a drive… Dad wanted to bury you in the place were you two met. The romantic right?" I ask with a laugh.

"We buried you here and then moved to sunny Phoenix for the cancer center… I guess it was just his time, the doc gave me the pills and shots and dad wanted to live is last year in the place were you two met, and be buried with you… I know how you fell in love with him. Such a romantic and you, you always loved so easy." I mumble.

With a sigh I walk around to her side, "I have met some people this week… I don't know them that well but. There different from the rest… there all.. good-looking" I say with a chuckle as I sit down placing my jacket under me. I'm soaked through and threw, more water is not going to kill me.

"There's this big you, he looks tough as hell. His name is Emmett and he's really funny. And his girlfriend Rosalie… wow… she's the essence of beauty. Then there's Jasper, dad would like him. He's very mind-set, and looks for a strategy in everything. He's a history buff so I know him and dad would have liked each other. Then there's Edward, he's quiet. But the way he is quiet just shows that he thinks a lot, I'm dying to have a debate with him. Then… then there's Alice." I say and I can't fight the small smile to grow in to a grin.

"She's so short, mom." I laugh softly. "She put you shame, she's… gorgeous, though. Her hair is all short, spiky and crazy. You would have envied her clothes and style… and her laugh, whenever I get to hear it… its so strange. It's like win chimes or something and the way her eyes show her emotions its like a good book. You just cant wait to turn the page." I say running a hand through my hair.

"She's so cute, like adorable cute mom. She puts puppy's to shame. And I have only ever talked to her a hand full of times, but… she's different. And I want her… but, I want to get to know her two… its strange and I don't want anything else to care about… I think I already lost enough for one life, I… I don't think I could handle to care about someone and then… get hurt." I say.

I laugh a bit. "I almost kissed her today, I was so close. But, I could see in her eyes that she.. she wasn't sure… I don't know since when I care about anyone's feelings besides my own… ive grown in to such a selfish person. But, right then. I just knew, she didn't want to kiss me. So, I lied." I say with a soft laugh.

"I… I told her she had marshmallow on her lower lip and even acted like I took it off and licked it of my thumb." I say with a laugh. "Isn't that the most stupidest think ever?" I ask no one. I laugh a bit more and sigh, the sound of rain falling the only noise.

Silence falls and rage slowly builds in me. "Damn it! Why the fuck do I event talk to the ground! Your both dead! You can't hear a word im saying! This…. This is just a way of being a damn masochist!" I growl standing up and pacing in front of the grave.

"I stand here waiting for an answer! Any fucking answer! Knowing, knowing very well I wont get one! I will never get one! I will never get to hear your voice again! Or dads! And I get so damn angry! I know you believed in God mom… but… I just keep praying to someone I just… don't believe in anymore." I yell tears falling from my eyes again.

"If there really was a God, then why did he take both of you and leave me here alone?! Why didn't he take me two? Why didn't he take me the last time when I crashed my fucking car!" I sob out in anger. "Well? I am waiting for a damn answer?" I yell at the sky. I stay quiet for along moment and nothing, everything stays the same. "Exactly what I though." I mumble and look to the side were my jacket is on the floor. I grab it and look at the two red roses in the pocket and place one next to the other. "I'll always love you guys…" I say softly kissing the united cross.

I step back and hold the jacket in my arm. I walk away, not looking at the place were only my parents bones are at. I walk slowly down until I reach the fence and close it behind me. I walk to my car and open my trunk to place the jacket and get in the car. I'm dripping wet, ill have to clean my car tomorrow.

I pull out quickly and speed down the street, my pain still in my heart. I grab my phone and speed dial 6. I smirk at my inside joke and look at the clock its 8 she better pick the fuck up. "Hello…?" she asks seductively. I grin "Hello, Heidi." I say. I hear her soft laugh "And who is this.?" She asks. I roll my eyes at her games "The person that made you cum six times in a row." I say with a grin.

"Hmmm, oh. Bella." She says. I chuckle, "The one and only." I say. She laughs "Silly, I know it was you." she says. I roll my eyes again "Yes, honey. I know that. I just need to cash in a favor." I say. She hum's "And what would that be?" she asks I can hear her smirk.

"I need you…to fuck me into oblivion." I say with a smirk, in a low seductive voice I know she loves. "Is that so?" she asks. "Yes, baby. I need you, you're the only one that can rock my body the right way." I say. Only half lying, she's the only good one at giving tongue in the fucking town besides me, I should know, she gave me tongue for two straight orgasms. Then I repeated the favor with my magic fingers.

"Fuck, baby. Don't talk like that, I'm already wet." She half moans. I grin "Wet without me even being there? I'll have to punish you for that one." I say pressing a bit harder on the gas. "Oh, yes… fuck, I'm horny. Were do we meet?" she asks. I smile "My house, ten minutes." I say. She sighs and I can hear her damn smile "Perfect, just enough time to get an orgasm in quick." She says. I growl "Don't you dare start without me, if you're not in my house, on my bed in the next ten minutes I am going A wall." I say clenching me teeth together.

She sighs a soft moan, "Fine, im on my way. Over night bag?" she asks. I grin "Baby its Friday. Of course." I say and hang up the phone. She loves it when I do that, so now im speeding like crazy to get to my house to meet this girl.

The only good thing about Heidi is that she's not clingy, she knows im a player but doesn't care as long as she gets some. I smirk as I lean back in my chair and go down the straight road. I slow down once I get to my drive and peel in only to park the car in the front lawn when I see Heidi leaning against the door.

I climb out of my car, jog up the rain and once she sees me she smiles then frowns "Bella baby, your all wet." She exclaims. I grin "Am I?" I ask. She rolls her eyes and I un lock the door and as soon as she's in the house I pin her against the door. "Shit, Bella your freezing." She mumbles.

I grin against her neck "Then good thing your going to warm me up, isn't it?" I ask pulling away. She looks at me in the eyes and grinds on me, my eyes close at the feeling and she starts trailing kisses down my neck. She bites and teases my neck and I grunt "Fuck." I mumble as she starts playing with the hem of my soaked shirt. She starts peeling of my soaking wet clothes and I peel of her clothes and we end up in my room.

Before long she has tongue fucked me until I have 3 orgasms and once I feel exhausted I pull her up to me and kiss her gently in thank you. She kisses me back softly before pulling away "Did I fully exchange the favor?" she asks against my lips. I grin lazily "Ask me in the morning." I say kissing her and pulling her naked warm body close to mine.

I am exhausted, I gave her two orgasms before letting her go down on me. And she gave me three with her mouth so you can imagine how tired we are. I pull away with a sigh and lean my head back on my pillow. She slides off me and curls up next to me pulling the cover up to our necks.

I sigh and close my eyes, finally, the deep hole I felt in my heart was ignored. The after glow of my orgasm over shining it so much that I don't even think about it.. I can help the small smirk that forms on my lips right before sleep consumes me.

**OoOoOoOoOo**

Its Sunday night and im bored as fuck. Heidi left on late Saturday night after having sex all day. I feel asleep quickly after she left and woke up today early as hell. I ran, ate breakfast, watched TV, read, did homework and now it's around… 8 a clock and im bored as fuck.

I was contemplating calling another lay to get over here but I don't want to fuck, I just want to not be bored. There's nothing to do. I washed all my clothes, cleaned my room, changed my bed sheets, cooked, baked and even went on a ride with my bike.

There's just nothing to do, im contemplating calling Jake to bring over some weed and smoke a blunt or two but I don't feel like weed today. I sigh and run a hand through my hair and look to the side were my phone is at.

I grab it and flip through the contacts until I find one that actually makes me laugh. Alice, I doubt she even knows I have her number. Emmett asked for my phone on Thursday and I was I think making out with Jolene Brook so I just tossed him my phone while we were kissing and when he handed it back to me, It had all six of their numbers.

I sigh and send a text to Emmett 'Dude, bored as fuck. What you up to?' I type and send. Out of all of them, me and Emmett are the most that talk at lunch. And we text on a regular basis while in school.

He does not reply so I switch to Alice and shoot her a text 'Hello, beautiful. How are you doing?' I type and send it. I sigh and go to the kitchen and grab a root bear and walk back. When I sit down and turn the TV on for background noise my phone beeps.

'Hello, Bella. And im doing good. You?' she asks. I grin, she didn't protest about the pet name. 'I am bored out of my mind. Watching some stupid TV show that is telling me to buy a glove that peels potato's and carrots.' I send back. Her reply is instant 'Lol, that an infomercial. Change it before your tempted to buy it!' she sends. I bark out a laugh.

'Who the fuck would ever buy these things?' I send her. She reply's quickly 'Old people, bored people and depressed people.' She sends. I chuckle at her craziness' 'So your calling me; old and depressed? That's not polite.' I send to her.

I take a drink of my root bear and switch to some weird show about the most X stream Animals. I kind of like it. my phone busses.

'It's also not polite to attach note's to someone's clothes and tease them. :p' she sends. I laugh, she got them. I wonder if she blush.. did she curse? I bet she did. I grin as I press the call button needing to hear this.

She pics up on the first ring "Hello?" she asks. I grin "Hello, beautiful." I say in to the phone. She sighs "Anything you wanted Bella?" she asks. I laugh softly "Hey, what's with the mood swing? I though we were having a mighty fine conversation via text." I say. She chuckles a bit "Did you just say via?" she asks. I grin "Depends, did it make you smile and laugh?" I ask. She chuckles "yes, it did." She says. I grin "Them I most definitely said via." I say leaning back on my couch with the can on my lips.

"So, you got the notes?" I ask smirking. There's a huff "Yes, I did." She says. I grin "And?" I ask. "And what?" she asks. I chuckle "Did you blush and cuss, beautiful. There just things I need to know." I say soothingly to her. "Perv." She mutters. I chuckle "I'm not being a perv. If I was I would ask what you're wearing." I counter.

"I'm wearing blue jeans a white top and your jacket." She answers me. My eyes pop out a bit and I cough on my soda. "Um, you're wearing my jacket?" I ask coughing a bit. She chuckles. "Yes, it's very warm. I don't think you're getting it back Bella." She says. I can't suppress the shudder that runs through me when she says my name.

The way it falls of her lips is almost like she's known me her whole life. I shrug "its fair enough, after all. The girls did rip your sweater, thanks for trying to lie though." I say. I can't help the image of Alice in my jacket, shit. that's sexy. My jacket swallow's her but damn she will look adorable.

She sighs. "I didn't want to lie, I just didn't want you to go looking for trouble." She says. I smile a bit. "Honey, I am trouble." I say softly. She laughs and I cherish the sound "Don't remind me." she says. I roll my eyes "How can you forget?" I joke.

She groans an innocent enough sound but shit, it sounded sexual. My eyes glaze over as I imagine her groaning like that while I kiss her. I shake my head from my thoughts. "Its quite easy, I just have to picture you laughing." she says. I smirk "You like my laugh, beautiful?" I ask.

She sighs "Yup." She says. I smirk "What else do you like about me?" I ask in a seductive voice. Hey, there's nothing wrong with trying right? "I like how your smart and how funny you are. I like how you always have a comeback and how easily you can brush things off." She says. I smirk "Sounds like someone has a crush on me." I tease.

She laughs out "Trust me Bella, if I had a crush on you. You would know." She says. I frown "So you don't find me attractive?" I challenge. She chuckles "I didn't say that, I just said I didn't have a crush on you. I never said you were good-looking." She says. I grin "You checked me out!" I exclaimed grinning.

"You kind of forced me two, you kept mentioning how hot you were and I was in between thinking you were getting a big head or that you were actually hot. So I had to check." She says. I grin "Did you like what you see?" I ask with a smirk.

She sighs "Depends." She says and I frown. "On?" I ask. I her soft wind chime laugh. "Who you were kissing." She says. My eyes go wide "You checked me out while I was kissing someone?" I ask laughing. She laughs with me "It's not my fault you have no need to breathe at all." She says. I laugh hard "Honey, when your experienced as me you don't need air that much." I say with a smirk.

"Wipe that smirk of your face, I can just hear it through your voice." She says. I laugh at her "Oh, come on beautiful. Just except that you want me." I say. She sighs "You wish." She says. I nod but she can't see that "Yes, I do. I can just imagine what your little body can do." I say and I hear her gasp.

I shrug, most of my flirting either crossed the line or was way under it. "Your fucking crazy." She says and I grin when she curses. "You sound so cute when you curse. Like a toddler repeating what an adult says. Do you even know what that word means?" I ask teasing her.

"Yes, I do. And if were going to pick at anyone it should be you. Who the fuck leaves notes in someone's underwear?" she asks I grin "A smart person." I state. "Why did you even leave me those notes, I was right downstairs." She says. I grin "Because I wanted to be in your thoughts all night. I doubt you could get me out of your head." I say.

"Mind games really? you had to stoop that low to make me think of you?" she challenges. I growl "I could find a thoughts way's to stay in your little head Alice. The important question being "Would you be ready for it." I say. She laughs "Bella, im sorry your just not my type." She says.

I frown "I'm everybody's type." I say. She chuckles "I'm sorry, Bella. I'm not everybody." She quotes me from Friday night. "Then what is your type?" I ask. She pauses for a moment and I grin "Alice… you don't even know what your type is do you?" I ask. More silence I chose to take advantage of it.

"Let me take you out tonight." I say. Silence "No." she says. I frown "Come on, one date. Let me prove to you that I can be your type." I say. Pause, heart beat, "No." she says. I frown "Why not?" I ask a bit irritated by her rejection.

"I make it a foundational rule not to date, players." She says. I'm quiet, "Fine, don't go out with me. I'll make you cave eventually." I say. I hear her soft laugh and growl in anger "Good night, Bella. Don't give yourself an aneurism, it's just the way it is." she says and before I can tell her goodnight she hangs up.

I hold the phone in shock and I feel my heart beat race. I was just rejected… by Alice fucking Cullen. I smirk, now there are two supper fine lady's I need to make mine. Leah and Alice. Alice being the priority since I think Leah is dating Maggie Torres. I'm not sure, I saw them together this morning while I drove around.

I shrug and run a hadn't through my hair… I need to know Alice. I need to know what makes her tick and what makes her who she is. I need to get to know her and once I do… I can ask her to go out with me.

Why the fuck am I obsessing over her? I have enough pussy to last me a year and a half. _But you want to know her, she's been on your mind since day one._ My mind says. I shake it and think better.

It's just because she's a novelty, it will wear off. I don't need Alice, fuck I'm not even sure I like her. I roll my eyes. Shit, I have Heidi. If I ask her to be mine she would in a heart beat. I sigh with a smile, I just need to wait until the novelty of Alice wears off… once it does. I'll be free of her.

I grin as I sit down on my couch and press to watch a movie.

**OoOoOoOoOoOo**

It was lunch, apparently I still had fucking detention because of Heidi's brilliant plan. So I had two more days of in school suspension. Right now I am at the table eating a bag of chips while everyone is around talking and shit.

I ignore everyone and eat my chips until I feel a soft just firm hand start to massage my neck, back until I turned to se Heidi behind me with a grin. "Baby, you were so good this weekend." She says. I grin and turn so that she can straddle my lap while im in my seat. "Thank you, so were you." I say.

She runs a hand through my hair ever so slowly and once she fist her hand in my hair my head goes to the side, a lazy smile on my face. I feel her lips kiss my neck and travel down until the collar of my shirt where I pull her back up so that she can see my face. "I'm still in suspension for that little forest trick you pulled." I say to her.

She bats her eyelashes at me, and her hair that reaches her waist is on her sides. And somehow she managed to open my jacket and palming me from my shirt. "Fuuck." I moan when she start to kiss my lips placing more pressure.

"Guy's get a fucking room." Jake says. I ignore him and bring Heidi's mouth to mine. In a heated passionate kiss, "Fuck, baby. I want you." she says to me. Is she dumb? She knows the whole table can hear us right? She bites my bottom lips and cups be secretly from under my jacket. I groan a bit "My car?" I ask She nods against my lips and I grin against hers.

I bring her to my lips again and then pulls away kissing my way on her neck. Then I stand her up and I give her my key's. "Get my car ready, ill drive to the road." I say and she nods and leaves the lunchroom.

I sit back in the chair and run a hand through my hair. "What, the fuck?" Jake asks. I look momentarily to him and grin "Lets just say we had a good weekend." I give him a grin. "So what? Your going to date Heidi?" he asks. I think about it for a moment and then shrug with a grin "Were just a casual hook up Jake. We have every single class together and fuck… shes hot." I say looking at the door were she left.

I grin at him "Dude… I though she was just good to make out with… she's fucking crazy in bed." I say. He laughs "Why am I not surprised that Heidi would get you trapped in her net?" he asks.

I shake my head "Honey, im the only net." I say. He frowns "What about mine?" he jokes. I shrug "I'm the gay net?" I offer. He laughs and I run a hand through my hair "Dude, fuck, she's… she's like sex on two legs." I say. Jacob laughs full heartedly "What I wouldn't give…" he sighs. I wink "want a three some?" I joke.

"I would give you three golden eggs." He says and I pout "Honey, I don't like eggs." I say. I her Emmett boom a laugh and look behind me to see Rosalie fighting a smile. Jazz and Edward snickering, Seth Leah and Emmett exploding with laughter and Alice… lost in though. "aren't you supposed to be bi?" he asks. I shrug "I like girls better." Say eating a few more Doritos from the bag.

"Your gong to stand up Heidi?" Jake asks. I snicker "Knowing her, she probably already started without me." I say and a shiver runs down my spine at the image and my mouth waters. "You know what, I go to fucking go get laid." I mumble taking Jake's can of soda and chugging down a pretty good percent.

"Hey!" he exclaims. I shrug "Honey come on! She's waiting for me in my car!" I say jogging to the door. I burst threw the doors of the lunch room as quick as can be to get to Heidi. Wouldn't you know it that once I reached the car, she had already started. No… she just fucking finished. I growl and slam the door shut and walk away back in to the school.

**Apov**

I se as Bella walks back in to the lunch room pissed as hell. Shit, she looks hot. Her eyes are dark and she slides those damn sunglasses on her eyes. Why would she hide her beautiful eyes from me? Not fair!

She sits next to me and sighs "What happened Bella?" I ask. She looks up at me and I sigh and take the sunglasses of her eyes. To look at her "She started without me." Bella pouts. I want to lean forward and kiss that pout away.

But I restrain my self. I nod to the back "Want to go out for a smoke?" I ask. She grins "though you'd never ask Beautiful." She says. I stand and she stands with me and we quietly walk out of the lunch room.

We smoke in silence until Bella sighs and I look at her "what's wrong, Bella?" I ask. She runs a hand through her hair. "My mind keeps playing tricks on me." she says. I grown "Like?" I ask. She looks at me, her eyes now as confident, there guarded. She slips her sunglasses on and shrugs.

I walk over to her and stand in front of her. She looks at me and blows smoke out her nose. I wrinkle my nose at that and she grins. I grab her sunglasses and put them on myself. "Watch-a think?" I ask. She smiles "You look hot, beautiful." She says.

I look at her "Why do you always call me that?" I ask. She shrugs. "Because, your beautiful." She says with a shrug. I nod once unsure "Do you call everyone Beautiful?" I ask. She shrugs " I can't really remember but im not sure. I don't think so." She says.

I nod once and smile "I like it when you call me beautiful." I admit. She grins "Your beautiful." She says looking in my eyes. I grin and nod "Your not allowed to call anyone besides me beautiful ever again agreed?" I say in fake seriousness.

She raises an eyebrow but nods once. "Alright…" she says with a smile. I smile "What do I get in return to not calling anyone beautiful besides you?" she ask. I grin and decide not to give a fuck and lean forward and place a chaste kiss on her lips. Her face goes blank for a moment and then she grins "Come on, beautiful. Work with me here, never shall I cal another living person beautiful and you only give me a pick?" she challenges.

I sigh and lean forward this time I kiss her softly but a bit longer. She kisses me back, electricity runs hot threw my veins and before I know it I cant force myself to pull away. Bella is still as a statue, her arms on her side letting me control the whole thing. She kisses me softly, tenderly even. Like she's afraid she will break me or vice versa.

Then she pulls away and leans her for head to mine, her breathing labored as hell "Wow…" she breaths. I grin and look up at her closed eyes until they open slowly. She then looks at me and gives me a soft smile and instead of kissing my lips how I so wanted to again she kissed my forehead "Beautiful." She mumbles before pulling away.

**A/N: Did you guys like it? And maybe it is going a bit fast but it will slow down after this chapter. I just needed to give them the final mutual screw's to figure out that they like each other. Now they just need to figure out what their going to do? Lots and lots of Choices!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:Yes, I know I have errors. I'm getting past chapters fixed so long I only have until chapter 3 fixed. My new beta Cullen Vamps (she's awesome) is fixing them up for me along with any mistakes. Thank you all for noticing them though. **

**Dis chapter is... well you won't exactly understand it until chapter 8 or 10 or something along those lines because this is right when they don't know how to feel for each other. Not explaining the headache this chapter was. I could not zero in on Alice's mind and let alone Bella's. This chapter was a bitch but I kinda like it.**

**I do not own twilight**

**Ch.6**

"Don't stop." I moan to Heidi. She continues to lick and nibble and my head falls back as she teases my clit with her lips. I don't know how this bitch got so good at tongue but shit, "Cum for me." She purrs and licks and nibbles. "Oh, shit." I moan when I'm right on the edge. I feel my muscles clench and then I go over the top when she pinches my clit.

I ride my orgasm as much as I can until there is nothing but that after tingle running through my body. I grin and look down at Heidi who is wiping her lips, I shift and pull her to me and give her a quick kiss. "That was good." I murmur against her lips with a smirk.

"Just good?" She asks against my lips. I can feel her smile, she knows she's the best. I shrug. "I've had better." I say and kiss her deeply. I can taste myself on her tongue. It's a weird feeling but I still like it.

She pulls back and starts to nibble at my lips. I'm not sure why but I suddenly remember that kiss a week ago. It was a good kiss, it was with Alice. It's been a week since Alice kissed me.

I was just joking around, I never though she would actually kiss me but… she did. And I may be crazy but I felt an electric current when her lips touched mine. I wanted to stay like that forever just kissing her, scary shit. I shake my head as I bite Heidi's lip.

"Fuck." She moans. I move to her neck and then I hear my phone buzz. I ignore it and continue my way down Heidi's chest until I'm in between her big breasts. I start to tease her and she moans even before I haven't even taken the tip into my mouth.

I grin and again my phone buzz's. I groan. "Ignore it." Heidi breaths. I nod and start to suck, nibble and lick at her breast when my damn phone buzzes yet again. I groan. "I can't." I say and roll off of her and reach to the nightstand to grab my phone. I flip it over, 2 missed calls from Jacob.

I sigh and call him quickly. "Finally!" He says. I growl. "I'm a little busy at the moment, care to hurry it up?" I ask. He chuckles. "The Cullen's are making their way to La Push for a bonfire, wondering if you were interested." He says. I sigh and lay back down on the bed just to have Heidi straddle me and start to rub her core on mine.

"Fuck… Look Jake, I… I… shiiiit I'll be there latter… damit!" Who the fuck continues to grind on you while your on the phone? I hear Jake laugh. "Heidi?" He asks. "Yeah.." I breath. He laughs louder, "She does that so that you pay attention to her. I'll hang up now, see you latter." He says. "Bring…fuck… the green." I tell him and hang up and flip us over.

"That's not polite." I say bitting her neck. She just moans and I slide my hand down to her center. "You want me?" I ask teasing her. "Yes." She moans and I push into her.

**OoOoOoOoOoO**

I walk out of the house with Heidi next to me. I lock the door and walk to the garage. "What car?" she asks. I smirk. "The bike." I say. She nods and I open the garage. She walks over to the helmets and starts to look until she finds the purple one. I laugh and shake my head and point to the full face helmet rack.

"I'm going to go fast, we're already late." I say and she rolls her eyes puts the quarter helmet down and picks up the full face purple helmet. I laugh and grab my black and red one. I zip up my jacket and put the helmet on.

I straddle the bike and rev the engine easily. Heidi slips in behind me and hugs my waist bringing her front flush against my back. I sigh. "Behave or your going on foot." I say. She nods and puts on her helmet and I drive out of the garage. I stop to push the button to close it and I speed off to the highway.

It doesn't take me long to get to La Push, especially not with my motorcycle. I get there just as the sun begins to sink into the water. I park my bike on the back rocks that divide the beach and parking and leave my helmet hanging there with Heidi's.

I walk to the beach with Heidi trailing behind me. I could care less what the fuck she does, I just didn't want to leave her at my house. I spot Jake quickly and their all sitting around the last fire pit.

Smart move, I'm not smoking weed in the middle ones again. I walk over and notice all the Cullen's even Leah, Seth and Mike. I walk up closer until they notice me. "Hey, guys." I say walking to wave at everyone. They all wave back with a chorus of. "Hey."

I go over to Mike and give him a soft kiss on the cheek. "Hello, dipshit." I say smirking. He chuckles and I get bored and sit down next to Jake. Once he sits down I glare at him. "What I do?" he asks. I raise an eyebrow and nod discretely to Mike. "He just showed up." He whispers to me. I groan then start to think. "Where is Embry?" I ask.

Jake shrugs and I grin. "Call him up for me, I just want a quicky." I say and pout. Jake huffs. "Didn't you just have sex with Heidi?" he asks. I nod. "Yeah, but it's more work with a girl. I just want a quick one were I don't have to pay attention to the partner for once." I say lowly.

Jake shakes his head and I pout. "Please, Jake. I'm begging here, I'll give you Heidi." I say. He laughs. "She's not yours." He says. I shrug. "She will hook up with you." I say and Jake things for a moment and shrugs. I look around and see that no one is smoking.

"Did you bring the green?" I ask. He nods and pats his pocket and hands me a bowl and a small zip lock bag filled with green. "I already took the stems out, you just need to light it up." He says. I nod and grab my lighter and I look at the Cullen's. "Any of you ever smoked pot?" I ask.

Alice who was drinking a soda coughs a few times "You're going to smoke pot?" she asks. I nod and raise an eyebrow at her, she looks at her family before raising her hand, I grin. "I knew it!" I say and Rosalie glares at her. "When have you ever smoked pot?" Rose asks.

Alice grins. "Gina was a pothead." She says with a shrug. I don't know who the hell Gina is so I look at the rest of them. "You guys ever smoked?" I ask. Rosalie, Emmett, Jazz and Edward nod and Alice laughs. "Hypocrites." She says to them.

"You're the small one." Edward reminds her. She roles her eyes. "I'm older then you Eddie." She says and he glares, I laugh at their family bickering. "Which one of you is the D.D.?" I ask.

They all look at each other and then they all pout. "Which one of you knows how to drive high?" I ask. They all look at each other gain and pout I laugh. "Mike." I say. He looks up from checking out Heidi's boobs. "Can you drive the Cullen's home after we leave?" I ask.

He shrugs and nods I smile. "No problem then Cullen's." I say and fill up the bowl. I light it and take a deep hit, Heidi cups my face and I look at her and she places her lips infront of mine but not couching. I let it go and Heidi sucks in the smoke, I take another hit and hand it to Jake.

I turn back to Heidi who is looking at me, she repeats the movement and I let the smoke go and she sucks it in. "Shit, it's like porn." Mike says and I laugh. "Honey, we're hotter then porn." I say looking at Mike. He nods and I wrinkle my nose at him and see that he has a beer in his hand.

"Hand me a beer?" I ask. He nods and walks to the edge of the woods were a cooler is hidden and grabs a few beers. He gives me and Heidi one and then all the Cullen's and Seth and Leah.

The bowl is with Leah who takes one pull and skips Seth and hands it to Emmett. "Hey!" Seth syas. But I speak before hand. "No pot until your at the least a Junior." I say to him. He sighs and I grin. "You can have beer?" I ask Leah. She shrugs. "His hangover not mine." She says with a shrug. I laugh. "Weed will kill his little brain, so only beer for now buddy." She says to him.

He shrugs and gets up to go to the cooler to get a beer. I chuckle wile he's all the way over there. "Why do you always hangout with your shaperone?" I tease Leah. She sighs. "Mother made me bring him, aperently I will set a good example on him." She laughs.

I snicker. "Yes, your showing him the real life. Gay's, sex, drugs and beer." I say sarcastically.

She grins and I nod my head to the shore. She shrugs and gets up and I stand up and walk with her to the shore line. Once we reach it I grab her wrist so that she faces me. "Everything going ok at home?" I ask her.

She smiles and nods. "Yeah, Seth just doesn't know there infidelity problems." She says. I nod and trail my hand down to entwine our fingers and give her a soft squeeze. "Whenever you want Leah, theres enough space at my house for both you and Seth. All you need to do is call." I remind her.

She grins and nods "Thank you but, were good for now." She says. I nod and let her hand go and run it through my hair. "You ever going to give me a chance?" I ask her. She looks at me but shakes her head. "No." She says with a small smile. I sigh. "At the least a kiss Leah, if nothing else let me be your first kiss." I say stepping closer to her.

She looks at me. "Why should I, Bella?" She asks. I look in her eyes. "Because at least it was with someone you know and care about, it will mean something." I say. She looks me up and down and I can see her caving. "Leah… do you really want your first kiss to be a guy in College? Let me be it, I know you care about me. It will mean something." I sooth.

She runs a hand through her hair and I sigh. "Whenever you want it… just… just ask." I say softly and turn to walk up to the fire pit. She stops me. "Bella." She syas. I look at her and offer her a small smile. "Yeah?" I ask. She bites her lip. "Kiss me." She says. I frown. "Your serious?" I ask. She nods timidly and I shift and take a step to her.

"I didn't give you a now or never. I'll give it to you whenever you wish, doesn't have to be today." I say softly to her. She nods. "I know but, I'm tired of fighting it. If a kiss is all I can get from you then… I want it." she says.

I take another step closer to her, me only an inch away form her. "No regrets?" I ask leaning forward until our noses are touching. She breaths. "No." She says placing her arms on my shoulders. I wind my arms around her waist I look in her eyes. "You can pull away." I say softly.

She smiles. "I know." She says and then she leans forward capturing my lips in hers. I cup her cheek with my free hand and give her a soft and kind kiss. It stays pure, like she needs. After a moment I pull away not wanting to deepen the kiss and ruin the moment.

I lean my forehead on hers and give her a smile. "You're a good kisser." I say softly against her lips, she's quiet. She kisses me again and I let her control it but I pull back when it stops being so gentle.

I groan and rest my head on her shoulder. "What's wrong Bella?" She asks softly. "We should head back to the campfire before I do something I might regret." I say against her neck.

She nods and we disentangle ourselves from each other. Once we get to the pit there cat calls and Leah blushes and hides in my neck. I chuckle and pet her cropped hair "Leave her alone guys." I say. And give her a small hug a kiss on the forehead, whisper a thank you in here ear and sit back on my log with Jake.

When Leah sits down Rose points at her. "You fell for her grin." She says. I knit my eyebrows together. "What the hell?" I ask. Rose looks at me. "She fell for your grin! I told her she would but she still did." Rose says and I laugh.

"Don't blame her, I convinsed her to it." I say taking a drink of my beer and spiting it out. "Oh, right… Seth put sand in your beer." Jake says. I glare at Seth and he shrugs. "You kissed my sister." He says. I stop, think for a moment shrug and stand up to get another beer.

I grab another beer and turn to see Alice behind me. I jump. "Shit, you scared me to death." I say with a chuckle. She grins and shrugs. "You seem alive to me." She says. I grin. "That so?" I ask. She nods. "You look like a kid in a candy factory." Alice muses walking around me to grab a beer.

I laugh softly. "I wanted to be her first kiss, I wanted it to mean something for her other then just something she won't be able to take back." I say shrugging. She opens her beer and looks at me. "Why do you care?" She asks. I take a drink of my beer and lick my lips. "Because… I wish I could take back my first kiss." I say looking at the water.

"Why?" she asks. I take a long chug of my beer and grimace at the memory. "Because…its something, look I just wish I had it back." I say to her. She raises an eyebrow "Sorry, I didn't mean to-" She's cut off my arms wrapping around my waist. I stiffen until I hear its voice. "Hey, Bella." Embry says. I grin. "Hey." I say lowly.

He shift his head to Alice. "I'm sorry, but do you mind if I steal her for a bit?" He asks. I roll my eyes and Alice shakes her head with a small smile on her lips. "Not at all." She says taking a swig of her beer. She looks me in the eyes for a moment and then she walks away.

What the fuck?

**Apov**

I walk away from Bella and Embry and go to the fire, no one is stoned or even buzzed because Mike dropped the damn bowl in the sand and Jake rolled a blunt which he dropped again. So now were out of weed and only have beer, I sit down next to Rose.

Jake starts counting some cash. "Hey, Alice. Want to put some money up to make Mike buy us some liquor?" He asks. I grin and take out a wad of cash and take out a twenty.

"Here you go." I say giving it to Jake. He grins and calls out to Bella. "Bella! Stop dry humping and come over here for a second!" He yells. I look back to see Bella and Embry talking normally.

"Um, Jake. Their not doing anything." I state. He grins. "Not yet." He says. Bella comes up. "Whats's up?" She asks. "Liquor Money?" He asks. She sighs and digs in her pocket and takes out another wad of money, "Um… how much you got so far?" she asks.

Jake starts counting the money, "Fifty." He says. She nods. "What are we buying?" She asks. I look at Mike. "The hard stuff." He says. Bella laughs. "You don't know hard until you have had my great grandfathers brew." She mumbles and starts to go through her cash and takes out a twenty.

She stretches it out to Jake and he grabs it. "Oh, I tried that once. Man, got wasted with two cans." He says and shudders. Bella laughs. "Only two? I'm up to six." She says. Jake laughs. "Its in your blood." He says and Bella gasps. "How do you know the secret recipe?" she asks.

Jake's face goes green and she laughs. "I'm just fucking with you man." She says laughing. He takes a deep breath and sighs. "Thank God." He mumbles and gives the money to Mike. "Buy good shit or we will kill you." Jake says. Mike puts his hands up in surrender.

"Wheres the bowl?" Bella asks. And Mike looks to the sand. "I dropped it." He mumbles. Bella chuckles. "Ok, there was enough for a blunt Jake. Roll one up." She says. Mike sighs. "Dropped that in the fire." He says. Bella glares at Mike.

"You have got to be kidding me." She says. Mike shakes his head and Bella gets out a few more bucks. "Buy some weed… rolled already." She says and hands him twenty bucks. "Who will I get it from?" Mike ask and Bella face palms her self in an adorable way, I can help but giggle. "Taylor, Mike. We all know you get it from Taylor." she says.

Mike walks quickly to the car and gets in and drives off. "Fucking Idiot." Bella murmurs. I laugh and she stares at me. "Why are you laughing? There is nothing funny about losing weed." She says. I can't help it and laugh again. She flashes me a grin and walks closer. "Why you laughing at me, beautiful?" She asks grinning.

I straigten up. "Can't I laugh?" I ask. She smirks. "Of course you can, Volkova." She says and messes my hair. I gasp exaggeratedly. "How dare you mess up my hair?" I say. She grins. "Oh, if you'd let me I would do a lot more then mess up your hair." She says with a smirk and wink.

I gap at her and I hear my siblings just. "Ooh." At us. Leah is just laughing at us, glad it wasn't her I guess. "Really?" I ask. She smirks. "Oh, you should know." She says. I laugh. "How so?" I ask.

She smiles and leans really close to me, I lean back again. "Scared?" She asks grining. I shake my head. "Uninterested. Big difference." I say. Her face goes blank and the whole circle just laughs. I grin and she smirks her eyes shining with something different and she goes really close my ear and whispers. "It didn't seem like that on Monday, beautiful." She whispers.

My eyes go wide and my mouth hangs open and she pulls back with a huge smirk on her face. "You're going to catch fly's beautiful." She says and lifts my jaw to close it. The circle is just snickering and I huff. "At least I won't catch anything from you." I throw back grinning. Her eyes go wide and she grin and raises an eyebrow and I glare at her and her smile grows even bigger.

She raises an eyebrow and her face glow's with the light of the fire. "Oh, it would do you good to catch a few things from me." She says. "Don't hold your breath." I say and she grins, winks and turns to sit next to Embry.

I frown, the fuck? Aren't we in a discussion? I sigh and sit next to Rose and she puts an arm around me. "Aw, you held your ground. Good for you." she says. I roll my eyes. "Why did she call you Volkova?" Edward asks. I laugh and run a hand through my hair "She's a singer, she has my haircut." I say.

He nods thoughtful and then shrugs. I grab my beer and drink it and across from me is Bella. She's kissing Embry and his hand is in her hair. The fire is high enough that I can be staring at it without anyone noticing I'm staring at them.

Shit, I sound like a creeper. I drink a bit more and watch and dreadfully hear Bella moan into his mouth. He grabs her and stands up and without a goodbye or an explination walks with her to the woods were Jake yells at them. "Beware the poison ivy!" And laughs.

Heidi sighs obviously bored, Jake notices. "Heidi want to go for a swim?" He asks. She smiles at him and shrugs. "Sure." She says before striping of her shirt. My eyes go wide as I see her in only a bra.

Her pale skin, her toned stomach, her big breast that don't even fit in her small lacy bra and… there's a bite mark on her neck. She stands and peels off her jeans giving me a view of her hip and her long strong legs. She's almost as tall as Bella.

I gulp and my eyes snap back to the fire. I feel Rose's hand on my back and she pats me once. "Lighten up, it's a party." She says. I look up at her and raise an eyebrow. "You want me to hook up with Heidi?" I ask incredulesly.

"Better her then Bella." She says flipping her hair. I frown. "I though you liked Bella." I state. She nods. "Oh, I do. She's awesome, I'm just weary that she will play you." She says. I roll my eyes. "Like I would fall for any of that." I say. She shrugs. "Shit happens." And when she said that a shirt is thrown to my face.

I look up to see Heidi smiling at me, "Why don't you join us in the water? It's bound to be more fun then staying here all alone." She says in a low voice. My eyes get a bit wide and I offer her a small smile. She laughs softly. "Come on!, I won't bite… unless you let me." she adds with a wink.

Rose pats my back and I see that my siblings are all striping off there clothes. Exept for underwear. I drink the last of my beer and stand taking off my shirt and lose fitting Jeans.

I look to the side to see that everyone exept Heidi is in the water. I look to the edge to see her standing there looking at me.

I sigh and walk down the small hill to the shore were Heidi is at. "Nice of you to join us." She says kindly. I smile. "Is the water good?" I ask. She nods. "Yeah, it's always a few degrees warmer. Especialy at night." She says. I nod and look back at the water to see everyone laughing and splashing.

"Well, let's get this show on the road." I say with a shrug and step in to the surprisingly warm water. I walk in to the watter until it's weist deep then I dive in. I swim around my siblings laughing at their goffyness until I knock in to someone. I turn in the water to see Heidi's head. "Sorry, didn't see you there." I say and scoot back.

"No big deal. I'm actually looking for something underwater, care to help me out?" she asks. I frown. "Um, it's really dark. I doubt you can see anything." I say. She chuckles and scoots close to me and places a hand on my hip. "Silly girl." She coo's. I scoot a bit back. "Heidi, I thought you and Bella?" I ask. She shakes her head. "She's with everyone, right now she's with Embry, most likely having sex. And Leah is still on cloud Bella, so… that only leaves you and me." She says from beneath her lashes.

My eyes go wide, she wants to hook up? Shit, I… I don't think I like her like that. "I saw you looking at me when I was taking off my clothes." She says softly. I look at her and open and close my mouth not knowing what to say.

"Why only stop at looking?" She asks and grabs my hand under water and places it on her tone stomach. I freeze and I can feel my cheeks redden. "Um, H-Heidi… I- I don't… Um." I stamer like a dork.

She chuckles, "Take a deep breath." She says in my ear. I take one and then, she kicks my legs out from under me and falls with me into the water. My eyes try to focus on her pale skin but I can really see much in the black water.

Before I know it I feel someone tugging at my arm. I look to the side to see Heidi lying almost flat on her back on the ground. How does she do that? I wonder as I'm pulled closer to her.

Before I can register exactly what is going on Heidi presses her lips on mine. I freeze until she starts to move them and I kiss her back. I place my hand on her hip to keep us close and we kiss until we need air . I push away from her and swim to the side as it not to look like we were kissing.

I pop up behind Emmett and decide to catch my breath. Heidi slides out of the water like a fucking sex God. Is everything about this girl sensual? The way her hair is slick and un-knotted is impressive and the way she gives me a soft smile makes me want to bite my lip.

Shit, I think I see what Bella finds in her. She's sex on two legs. I step out from behind Emmett and swim slowly to shore. I'm out of view from my siblings when woudn't you know it Heidi pops up behind me.

"Oh, hey." I say. She nods and before I can speak another word she leans closer and smiles against my lips "I wasn't done kissing you, silly." She says. I nod and we kiss, I stay stiff as a pole and she notices it. "Relax." She breaths still kissing me. I relax a bit, she grabs my hand and places it on her hip. "Touch me, if you want." She says and unites our lips again.

I grip her hip tighly as to not be tempted to move my hand, she must have understood wrong because she bucks her hips against mine and my eyes snap open and I jump out of her grasp. "Oh, um. T-thanks b-but no. Im g-good." I stamer quickly before bolting back to the fireplace.

I jump a bit when I see Bella laying against a log. I look at her closely. "You ok?" I ask. Her head snaps to mine as if she had not heard me coming. "Oh, hey. Yeah, I'm good. Just.. lost in though I guess." She says.

I nod once and she looks at me. Her eyes go wide and her mouth hangs open, her eyes trail up and down my wet body and in the light of the fire I can see them grow darker. She opens her mouth as if to speak but no words come out, she looks like a fish out of water. I laugh softly. "You look like a fish." I state.

She seems to snap out of it and nods once and looks at the fire. "I… um," she clears her throat. "Wow…. Alice… you look, um, wow." She says not looking at me. I grin and duck my head. "T-thanks." I murmur.

She looks at me and I notice at the same time I'm shivering. She smiles at me and sits up taking off her jacket. "Why is it that it seems I'm always the one warming you up?" she asks. I shrug as she hands me the jacket and I slide it on quickly.

She pats the space next to her on the quilt she's sitting on. "No sand on your butt?" She says smiling. I laugh softly and sit next to her. The fire warms me quickly but a cold draft hits me and I my teeth start to chatter.

She frowns and scoots closer to me. "Don't worry I'm not going to try anything. You're just freezing." She says lowly as she tucks me on to the side of her warm body. I snuggle in to her appreciating the warmth. "Where's Embry?" I ask. She shrugs. "I'm guessing making out with Heidi or something." She says.

My shouldes stiffen at her name and Bella seems to have felt it. "Um, did… did she try anything on you?" She asks quietly. I sigh and relax my back. "Um… we made out in the water." I murmur quietly.

Bella nods twice "Understandable, she's temptation on two legs." She says. I laugh softly. "How is it that we actually get along when there's no one around?" I ask. She laughs. "We get along everywhere, beautiful. We become train wrecks unable to talk in a sentence when we're together alone." She says.

I laugh softly. "Wonder why that is." I muse. She shrugs. "I don't know, beautiful. Really wish I could find out." She says. After that we fall in to a good silence, and bask in the warmth of the fire and Bella's jacket.

She starts to hum softly and before I know it my eyes fall and I'm dragged in to my sleep.

**A/N: *sticks head out on corner* What did you guys think?... *ducks from tomatoes* I needed this to happen, I have most everything figured out!... J trust me?...**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: This chapter was a hustle I re-wrote it like six times! Like, Review and tell your friends. Peace!**

**I don't own TWILIGHT**

**Ch. 7**

**Bpov**

Alice fell asleep quickly in my arms. I resist the urge to play with her short hair or touch her sleeping face that is laying on my shoulder. I sigh and look at the fire, in the distance I can hear our friends splashing and laughing.

I focus on a small log that's in the fire while I contemplate, why did it bother me so much when Alice told me she kissed Heidi? Why do I care? I shouldn't care. She's single and I don't care about anyone… _liar! _A voice yells at me.

I take one hand and carefully run it through my hair tugging it slightly, do I care for Alice? Do I care in general?... shit I can't think straight. Especially when she's snuggling next to me and her head is tucked under my chin.

My eyes travel from the fire to the girl in my arms… last time I cared for people they keep abandoning me. I loved my mother and she died, I loved my father and he died… I loved Connor before he did what he did. I grimace and look back at the fire, Connor can rot in hell for all I care.

He can rot in his jail cell. If I cared I would have visited him. I chuckle a bit at myself only to feel Alice's arms constrict around me tighter. I stop and place my chin on her head while I go crazy.

Why do I feel so comfortable right now… shouldn't I feel constricted like when I snuggle with my lay's? Correction, I don't snuggle. They snuggle with me and after a few minutes I untangle myself from them and scoot to the side.

I purse my lips and wrinkle my brow in thought, I should feel the need to breathe, the need to get away from her. I should get away from her… Alice is a good girl, she deserves way better then the likes of me.

What can I offer this girl other then heart break?... and good sex. I roll my eyes at myself. "Bad brain." I murmur to myself still thinking. I grab a long stick from next to me and poke the fire ashes go up as a piece of wood falls. "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust." I say softly.

I kiss the top of Alice's head and freeze, did I just… yeah, I kissed the top of her head. The fuck is wrong with me? I check my pocket quickly and sigh when I feel my cigs. I take out the black box. I grin. 'Djarum Black' imported cigs are the best. I love the cinnamon flavor and the nicotine buzz is good.

I cautiously take one out and light it with my lighter. I take a long and deep pull and just hold it in and lean my head back to blow out the smoke. Shit felt amazing, the way my jaw tingled like after an orgasm. Practically the same feeling accept less intense.

"What should I do about this…" I wonder looking down at a sleeping Alice. I'm surprised to have to admit I do care for her, but I'm pretty sure it's the same way I care over Leah or Rosalie. As a friend… right?

Fuck, I can't think straight. I roll my eyes, why do I care? I should feel indifferent towards Alice. The same indifference I feel for everyone, sure their all fun to joke around with but… just at an arms length so that when something happens to them, I do not care enough to feel hurt.

I frown, "Indifference." A smirk makes it's way across my face as I consider it. I finish my cigarette throwing the filter to the camp fire and shifting just enough to prop Alice's head with my arm and look at her face. My face in concentration is indifferent and I love the feeling. I should not care for Alice but… I want too.

I look at her sleeping face and frown… can I do that? Can I care towards her?... I shouldn't. With my free hand I cup her cheek and turn it to the other side gently not to wake her. I feel the electricity run through my hand and I frown.

"Why do I feel that?" I ask myself. My face crumples into one of curiosity as I move her face back to look at mine. I look with the corner of my eye to the water below were their all still playing in the water.

I look back at Alice and sigh. "I'll protect you Alice… but I don't think I can care for you." I say softly moving a piece of her hair that had fallen on to her face. I allow myself a small smile and run my thumb along her cheek. "You'll be better off… without my baggage." I say my thumb grazing over her cheek again.

_Will she? Or will you?... _a voice in my mind asks. I frown again. "I can't love her, nor do I wish to hurt her…" I murmur lowly. _Who are you to think for her? Let her make the decision.. _the damn voice says. I think for a moment, actually think it through "I'll let you chose Alice… I hope your choice is the correct one." I whisper and place a soft quick kiss on her lips.

"I can't care for you, I can't love you but, I will protect you… weather that would be enough to take this feeling away… I do not know." I say, so low I can barely hear it. Why does it feel safe to want her? I shake my head, its not safe to want anything.

I pull back from her face and shift so that her head is on my shoulder and I am leaning against the log. It's a few minutes and another cig until they gang gets back and stop when they see us.

"Um… the hell?" Jazz says. My head snaps to theirs. "Oh, um. She was cold and then she just… fell asleep." I say to them. Rosalie glares at me. "Come take a walk with me, Bella." She says. I raise an eyebrow at her tone and look at Alice. "I can't exactly move." I say to her.

She rolls her eyes. "Jazz, take her place." Rosalie snaps. I snicker a bit at her mood, what got up her butt? I wait until Jasper is next to me and slide out prying her hands off me and Jasper slides in.

"She's going to wake up. Your soaking." I tell him. He shrugs. "She won't, she's quite the heavy sleeper." He says quietly. I stand straight and look over at Rosalie who is in this huge jacket.

It must be Emmett's, it's huge on her. I walk over to her and she starts walking, with a look over my shoulder I follow. We walk until were practically on the other side of the beach and Rosalie turns so quickly I almost walk in to her.

"Shit. Some warning would be great." I mutter to her. Rose does not answer me and glares. "You should stay away from Alice." She says. I lift an eyebrow. "And why is that?" I ask her.

She sighs "Bella, you're an awesome girl. But, I don't want my sister to get hurt." She says. "And you think I would hurt her?" I ask amused. She frowns. "No, at least not intentionally." She says. I purse my lips and nod. "So, you want me to stay away from Alice?" I ask trying to fight a smile tugging at my lips.

She shakes her head with a sigh. "I meant stay away from her emotionally, don't play her like you do half the school." Rosalie says. I nod a few times thinking her words over. "So, you want me to not date your sister?" I ask. She nods one, stiff nod.

I smirk. "Isn't that her choice? To date me, I mean." I say smoothly. Rosalie's face is angry. "I thought so." I say. Rosalie glares at me. "I won't stand by and let you play her." She says. I frown. "What if she wants to be played?" I ask her. She smiles and shakes her head. "Alice won't fall for your stupid charm." She says. I smirk. "We'll see about that." I say with a shrug.

Rose steps closer to me. "I'm warning you now, don't mess with her. I will hurt you." She says angrily. I laugh. "Like you could take me." I laugh. She surprises me by punching me in the gut, I lean forward and growl at her.

"The fuck?" I ask loudly. "You should never assume something, Bella." She says. I straighten up sucking in a deep breath and I grab her arm. "You shouldn't mess with me, Rosalie. I eventually get what I want." I say with arrogance. She just shakes her head. "Your never going to live a happy life if you stay like this." She says to me.

I laugh without humor and let her arms go and step back. "My life hasn't been happy in a long time, what makes you think I want to change it?" I ask looking at her. Her face is blank and I nod once.

"You should get back, Rose. I bet there wondering what happened. I'll join you all later." I say and keep walking to the farthest edge of the beach. I don't even bother looking to see if she walked away. I just kept walking.

I walk until I reach the cliff and from it I can see the campfire. I see Rose just walking into the circle and Emmett hugging her. They look back, I imagine wondering where I am. Jacobs eyes fallow the cost and I pat my pocket until I find my lighter and turn it on.

I move it around until his eyes zero in on me. I hold it and move it up and down twice and turn it off. He continues to talk, while I stare at the black water and light up another cig.

"Well… guess I need to watch out for Rosalie. I'll get Alice, I'm sure of it." I sigh while I blow the smoke out. I smile as I look down at the waves crashing below the cliff "Looks like this just got a shit load more interesting." I say and flick the unfinished cig over edge and turn on my heel and walk back to the campfire.

I'm greeted by nods and I take the bottle of DonQ out of Mike's hands and take three big gulps. They sting on the way down but I ignore it and look at him. "The weed?" I ask. He points to Jacob who is holding a blunt.

I go over to him and smile. "Can I have one?" I ask. He rolls his eyes and gives me the lit blunt, I look around to see Alice sitting on a log talking with Jasper. I look to the side to see Rosalie glaring at me I grin and raise my eyebrow while I take a drink.

I take a deep pull of weed and smile as I let it out. "This is good shit." I say bringing it back to my lips and plopping down on a log. I take it out and pass it to Jazz who takes a hit and passes it to Alice who looks at me in the eyes and takes a long pull.

I smile when I see her close her eyes as she lets the smoke go and when she opens her eyes they meet mine. She gives me a lazy smile and with a sigh I take another swig of DonQ and pass it on to Jasper.

Heidi finds her way next to me and gives me a sloppy hug, I stiffen the move away from her feeling suffocated. She leans on me again, I sigh and push her away. "Stop." I tell her seriously and look to Jake only to feel her lips on my neck I clench my jaw and push her back. "Will you fucking stop?" I ask loudly.

Heidi watches me. "The hell is your problem?" She asks. I stand and glare at her. "My problem is that you keep leaning on me like some love sick puppy! Get the fuck away from me." I say harshly.

She stand and looks at me. "What crawled up your ass and died?" She asks. I glare at her and my fist clench. I take a deep breath. "Nothing, just get the fuck away from me for a while." I say strained.

Heidi scoffs. "Call me when you get over whatever it is that is bugging you." Heidi says walking off with Mike. I clench my jaw tightly my mood going south. "I'm leaving." I say and walk away angrily. I get to my bike and pat my pockets for the keys.

I frown. "Where the fuck did I… shit." I say and lean my head on the handle bar's. "My keys are in my jacket." I say against my arm. "Good thing I followed you then." Alice's soft voice says from behind me.

I sit up and look behind me to find her walking slowly over to me and hand me my jacket. "Um, I never go to thank you… for giving me your jacket." She says. I give her a stiff nod and reach for my jacket. "Are you alright?" she asks me while I put my jacket on. I offer her a small smile. "Yeah, I'm fine beautiful. Just got pissed when Heidi got clingy… I'll apologize tomorrow. She just gets like this when she's drunk." I say grabbing the helmet from the handle bars.

Alice smiles. "Will I ever get a ride?" She asks nodding to my bike. I grin and look back to the bonfire. "Sure. Hop on." I say deciding to piss Rosalie off. It's not like she could ever hurt me in a fight.

Alice smiles and I hand her the full faced helmet and she puts it on before getting on behind me. I rev the engine to life and smile. "Hold on tight beautiful." I say and grin when she does. I spur the engine a bit more and launch it out of the parking space.

I hear Alice squeal when I take the curb to get on the road and I laugh as she holds onto me for dear life. I slow down a bit after a while to not scare her… alright, alright! I wanted more time with her.

Just because I can't have her does not mean I can't cherish her company right? Well, I don't know. I drive smoothly until I hear Alice laugh. "Is this as fast as this thing can go?" She challenges. I laugh. "Hold on and I'll show you." I challenge. I feel her arms wrap even tighter against me and I grin before launching out of going as fast as I can control.

I get to the freeway quickly and after a mile or so I turn back and drive down until I reach the opening to her house. I curve slowly and stop when I reach the parking of her house. She's home alone and I pull the shield off my eyes. "Alice, you sure you want to stay here alone?" I ask. She gets of the bike and thinks for a moment "Why don't you come in?" she asks.

I sigh and think for a moment. I click my tongue and sigh "I can't." I say. Alice takes off her helmet and frowns "Why not?" She asks. I offer her a smile. "I don't think it would be for the best to have me around all the time Alice." I say to her.

Not the best for me and not the best for you, were both good this way. She frowns. "Why would it not be for the best?" she asks. And I sigh. "I'm not the best company to keep, Alice." I say.

She nods. "I don't mind that you're a player." She says to me and I grin. "You should." I tell her. She shrugs. "I don't fall for players so how does that risk me?" She asks. I shrug. "What if I fall for you, beautiful?" I joke half heartedly.

She grins. "I don't know… would you change?" she asks. I snort "That's not likely." I say grinning at her. She frowns. "You actually like being a player?" She asks. I think for a moment then nod. "Yeah… it keeps me from getting attached." I say. She nods and purses her lips. "Why would you…." she trails off, the question hanging in the air.

I sigh, "This isn't a moment to ask that. One day I'll answer you, beautiful. But… not today." I say. She nods. "Will you ever tell me the full story?" She asks me and I look her in the eyes.

I frown, "I… I don't know. I've never told anyone." I say. She nods thoughtfully. "I… I hope you trust me enough as a friend some day… to tell me." She says. I offer her a small smile. "Yeah… maybe some day." I say and sigh.

"I should go, good night Alice." I say. She hands me the helmet and I place it on the compartment under the seat. "Good night Bella." She says. I nod offer her a smile "Bye, beautiful." I say and with that I rev the engine and drive out.

No, I won't fall for Alice… I can't. She will just be my friend… I can use a friend. Someone to talk to when I'm bored, someone to bug me about trivial things and maybe… maybe I can slowly befriend them. All of them, maybe I can… trust them.

Yeah… trust. I can do that, carefully… but maybe I can. I can't wipe the small smile on my face, I can try to trust them. How hard can it be?

**A/N: Baby steps people, baby steps. Bella will continue to talk her way out of a lot of shit. We just need to be patient with her after all she has been hurt countless amount of times.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Here is the next chapter! This one came all on its own so if you don't like it, not my fault and if you do like it… good for you! and me. Lol, so prepare for an epic twist to what you all know… or some other really dramatic words! Blah, just read the chapter and Review!**

**I do not own TWILIGHT**

**Ch.8**

**Bpov.**

"Hey, Bella." Taylor says as I walk in to my gym class. I nod to him. "Hey, Taylor." I say. "Coach Clap is sick so the sub told us to play volleyball, want to be captain?" He asks. I nod and head to the girls locker to change in to my blue shorts and yellow T.

I step out just as Alice walks in. "Hey, Volkova." I say flashing her a grin. She rolls her eyes. "Hey, Bella." She says. "We're playing Volleyball. You can just sit in the stands with the others if you want." I say to her. She shrugs. "Cant I play?" She asks. I frown. "You woudn't want to play in this game Alice, trust me ok?" I tell her.

She frowns. "I don't get it." She says. I sigh and put my hair in to a tight ponytail. "Their a bit violent when Coach Clap isn't here." I tell her with a smile. She rolls her eyes "Then why are you playing?" She asks. I grin. "I'm team captain for the girls team." I say smirking.

She laughs her wind chime laugh and I grin. "Alice just trust me you don't want to play in this game." I say looking over at the boys. She sighs but nods and I smile. "Thank you, beautiful." I say and walk to the court where Mike is the other team captain.

"First chose." I call. Mike nods and I look over at the guys pursing my lips. "Taylor." I call, he grins and walks over to me.

"Chester." Mike calls.

"Lizzy." I call.

"Dante." Mike calls.

"Aaron." I call.

"Michelle." Mike calls.

I nod looking at the last people on court two people. Cassandra and Ben. Cassandra plays with me on the team but she's not the best… but she's way better then Ben. I grin. "Cass." I say and she grins and walks over. Mike sighs. "Come on Ben." He says and they walk to their side.

"I'll serve." I say. We devise a simple plan and we take our places. They pass me the ball and I look around noticing Alice staring at our game. I send her a wink and look at the court staring at Chester but I'm really staring at Michelle. I aim as if I was throwing at Chester and spike the ball hard to her.

She dosen't realize it and the ball hits her chest. She groans. "Fuck, Bella." She says. I chuckle. "Pay attention." I say with a shrug and wink. "Hope you kiss and make it better." She flirts I shrug and the ball is thrown back to me.

I spike it again and Mike blocks it on the net Lizzy tries to save it and kicks it throwing it to Taylor who throws it up and I run forward and jump and spike it to the ground. I jump in place a bit and go back. Dante goes and serves launching the ball at me, I throw it up and Lizzy puts it in place for Aaron. Who spikes itto Dante's face.

I wince. "Ouch." I mumble. I look to the bleachers and laugh when Alice's eyes are wide. I chuckle to myself and look back to see the ball flying to me, I close my eyes as the ball hits my chest and I take a step back. The air getting pushed out of me, I turn to look behind the net and see Chester grinning.

I take a deep breath and wince a bit, "Oh, it's on. Guy's don't go easy." I say and we start to play violently. Not even giving them the chance to get a good shot in before we spike it at their heads or chest. On a sad occasion I spiked itto Chester's… um… junk.

Only to fall on the floor laughing when he cried. Of course that got me a penalty for two shots but that didn't last long seeing as my team are playing like crazy. I look at the board and grin my team 21, Mike's team 14.

"Game point." I say as I step back in to the court and grinning when it's their serve. It's my turn to be at the front of the net and me and Chester are glaring at each other. "Good luck, bitch." He says to me. I grin. "Oh, come on Chester. Don't have to be such a homophobic twit." I say grinning.

"Shut up Dike." He snarls I laugh. "Like I haven't herd that before, tell your girlfriend she was great last night for me." I say just as Mike serves the ball. I jump and spike the ball at Chester's shocked face accidentally braking his nose.

I land softly and wipe the sweat trickling down my forehead. "You bitch! You broke my nose, Dike!" He yells at me. I shrug. "If you can't handle the game, get out of the court." I say and turn to leave.

Only to get yanked back when he grabs my hand with his his bloody hand going to my shoulder. I grimace. "Don't touch me with your blood, creep." I say to him. He growls and glares at me, blood trickling down his nose.

I freeze my blood running cold, I don't know how I did what I did next but I think it was just the training my dad had always given me. I manage to tuck my leg behind his knee and push down at the same time causing him to fall to the ground and then I place my foot on his neck and leave it there, placing absolutely no pressure.

"I told you not to touch me." I say slowly, glaring at him. His eyes go wide and his hands go to try to push my leg off when I notice I take my foot of his neck. "S-sorry… you just freaked me out." I mumble to him.

He glares but gives me one stiff nod. With a sigh I walk away as the people try to gather around us, I shift through them quickly and head to the punching bag corner of the gym. I grab a pair of kick boxing gloves and go to the punching back and without any prep I start to throw combo's on it. I kick punch, hind kick, double jab, smack/punch.

I'm so entwined with beating the crap out of the damn bag that when I finally pull away I'm dripping with even more sweat. I laugh softly at my elf and go to the corner were I place the gloves on the laundry bag.

I turn to see a bunch of girls looking at me, I know most of them. I give them a nod and go to the corner to grab a towel and wipe the sweat off of my face and neck. I grimace a bit at all the damn sweat but with a smile to the girls I go to the locker room were… I hear someone follow.

I am rummaging through my locker when a girl clears their throat, I look to the side to see Maria smiling at me. "Hey, Bella." She says kindly. I smile. "Hey, Maria. What's up?" I ask, looking back at my locker to get my regular clothes out.

"Oh, nothing. I was just wondering if you were ok?" She asks. I smile and nod. "Yeah, just… needed a stress reliever." I say. She nods. "Really…" She muses. I cock my head to the side. "Look, Maria. I have a lot of homework I'm behind on, I don't have time for your games." I say closing the locker and grabbing my clothes to head to the shower.

When I take the corner I knock into Alice, her eyes go wide when she sees me. I imagine she was scared, weather it be the volleyball game, the almost fight or the kick boxing I would never know.

"Excuse me." I say politely as I maneuver around her to walk to the showers. "Bella, wait." She say. I sigh and stop. "What?" I ask tiredly. Man, I was knocked out tired, sore and in a bad mood.

"I… I was just wondering if you were alright." She says softly. I frown and offer her a small smile wishing I had my shades to hide my eyes. "Don't worry, beautiful. I'm fine, just tired and in dire need of a shower." I say offering her a grin.

She frowns and reaches a tentative hand to my cheek and I wince. "Now, I know why you didn't want me playing." She says. I give her a small smile. "Better me then you." I say with a shrug then wince when my muscle protest.

She giggles. "Your completely drained… go take a shower. I'll wait for you in the parking lot." She says. I frown but give her a quick nod and head over to the showers not having enough energy to continue to talk to her.

After a quick but thorough shower I get dressed and gather my things. I stager lazily until I reach my car to see Alice leaning against it. I lift my head to look around to see no cars other then my Mercedes. I raise an eyebrow as I walk to the car. "What you still doing here beautiful?" I ask leaning against the car.

She raises a brow, "I'm driving you home." She says. I grin. "Really?" I ask. She nods and I shake my head. "Get in." I say as I make my way to the driver side only to have Alice walk over to it and stand in front of the door, in my way.

I sigh. "Please, Alice. I don't feel like arguing. I just want to go home, do my homework and go to bed." I say. She sighs. "Let me drive, I'll take you to your house. You look like your about to pass out." She says to me.

With a heavy sigh I take the key's out of my pocket and hand it to her. She grins at me and I take it from her hand. "You legal?" I ask. She rolls her eyes and nods I sigh and place them in her palm. I walk over to the passenger side and Alice has a difficulty with the door. I chuckle. "Pull out then up and it will slide up." I say to her. She nods and does as I tell her and the door shoots up.

She slides in and I slide in I pull the door down and she does too and she turns the car on. I lean on the seat and push it until I'm laying on my back and I look at her from under lazy eyes. "Buckle up." I say to her, she nods and buckles up and then she looks at me expectantly.

"Just drive." I sigh and place my arm over my eyes feeling completely drained. I hear a sigh and I feel someone lean on me, I lift my arm a bit to see Alice leaning over me reaching to the seat belt.

I chuckle and look at her until she "buckles me up" I'm too tired to make a side coment and when she restraps in she pulls out and drives on the street. The car is quiet, not even music is playing.

I zone out for a second only to feel my eyes snap open when I feel a hand shaking my shoulder. I shoot up. "What?" I ask looking around for danger. Alice giggles softly "Nothing, calm down. We're at your house." She says. I look up and see my house. "Oh… must have zoned out." I say before yawning.

She nods and gets out and I get out but slower. The rain falling on me, I don't care and walk slowly over to the porch where Alice is waiting. I don't even bother putting the car in the garage.

I shuffle over and Alice hands me the key's and I open the door. I motion lazily for Alice to go in first and when she does I enter and close the door behind me quietly. I take off my coat and Alice gives me hers to hang.

That's when I notice she has her book bag. "Oh, I didn't know you brought it, I would have carried it in." I tell her. She rolls her eyes. "No need, I can do it." She says.

I nod and motion for the living room. She walks with me and once we reach the couch I plop down with a groan, Alice chuckles. "If you get this beat up playing volleyball then maybe you should stop." She says.

I smile, "This is not from volleyball, I'm just tired." I say lifting my bag to the long coffee table and placing it there, I look at Alice. "You want something to drink? Eat?" I ask. She shakes her head and I shrug and stand up and walk to the kitchen and grab two cokes from the fridge.

I walk back out and place the can in front of her. I take my seat and open my can and take a long drink savoring the burn. "Well, um, homework… fun." I mumble sarcastically as I open my book bag and search for the three classes I didn't have time to work on this afternoon in study hall.

I look over to see Alice working on what looks like math… or Chinese. I focus back on my English essay, scribbling quickly what I think about Wuthering Heights. I didn't need to read the novel seeing as I have it memorized. This essay is actually for next Monday but if I have it now, I don't have to worry about forgetting it and can relax during the weekend.

I stop writing to take a drink of my coke when Alice huffs. I chuckle. "What's wrong, beautiful?" I ask. She looks up at me in shock as if not thinking I would hear her. "Oh, um, nothing. Just this problem I don't know how to work- hey!" she says as I reach over and take her notebook out of her lap.

My hand grazing softly over her Jean clad thigh. I try to ignore the tingling in my hand and check over her work, almost instantly I see the problem. I place my stuff on the coffee table and scoot over to show her. "Look, right on this part." I say motioning to it, "Your supposed to change it for this formula." I say scribbling it down next to it and looking at her and she nods once looking intently at the notebook.

I smile and look back. "You switch up these numbers here… and get the result you want." I say doing the process slowly to her. She nods and says. "Ooh… now I get it." before taking the notebook and working on the rest of it as I scoot back to my side of the couch and finish my essay quickly.

I read it over and look to the side to see Alice staring at me. I look back at her. "What?" I ask. She grins. "Nothing." She says. I narrow my eyes at her playfully. "Alice…" I say warily. She sighs. "Nothing, I- I just like your smile. You don't do it so often, you either smirk or grin but their both with arrogance. I- I never get to see your real smile and i-it's nice." She says quickly.

I nod once "A-alright then… thank you." I say amused. She blushes and looks down. "If it's any consolation, I love your little blush. I find it adorable." I blurt out before I can think it through. I want to face palm myself.

She just blushes deeper red and looks at her notebooks and I do the same. We work a bit more in tense silence until I want to break it. "So, Alice. I still know almost nothing about you… mind sharing?" I ask giving her a small smile.

She looks up, purses her lips and shifts, the homework forgotten. "Um, well. My full name is Mary Alice Brandon Cullen." She says. I frown. "You have two middle names?" I ask. She nods and shrugs. "I.. I honestly don't know why. I tried to ask Esme about it once but she never really got around to it so I just let it drop." She says.

I nod and put my homework on the coffee table, wanting to give Alice my full attention. "I'm seventeen, Edward is my twin brother, I'm older then him. Um… I lived a real happy childhood, having Edward and Emmett as brothers growing up was cool. And then Dad adopted Rose and Jazz from abusive parents, after a while they started to grow attached and now we're just a big happy family." She says with a shrug.

I wrinkle my forehead with an amused smile on my face. "Interesting, but… how did you realize you wanted to design? And when did you find out you were gay? Give me more details, beautiful." I say giving her a 'dazzling' smile.

She cocks her head to the side and then sighs. "Um… I think I've always wanted to be a designer, I've always loved fashion and clothes. I made my first dress at 8 when Mom taught me how to sew. And I first found out I was gay when I was fifteen. I was so confused that I was never attracted to guys even though my friends and all would go crazy over them." She says.

"Guy's would ask me out all the time but I always declined, telling them I had homework or I was grounded. So, one night I'm sleeping over at Gina's house. She was my best friend and she was telling me how she had never kissed anyone and was nervous because she had a date with this guy." She says and a blush spreds through her cheeks.

I raise an eyebrow interested. "S-so, um. W-we were smoking pot and were so high that we didn't care and she asked me to kiss her… just to know if she was good like they did in the movies. I… I shrugged and leaned forward and kissed her quickly but when I pulled away she started to move her lips and before I knew it we were making out, her tongue in my mouth and my hands in her short hair." She says.

I nod twice and clear my through. "So, um… you both found out you were gay?" I ask. She nods. "And… you and Gina… you guys dated?" I ask. She nods. "Yeah… she was my first love." She says quietly.

My eyes go wide, her first love?... Does that mean Alice isn't a virgin?... shit, I'm not asking that. I doubt she is, I'll just ask how long they dated for and just calculate how long it would take for them to get… together. "So, you and her dated for how long?" I ask.

"Um, three years. We broke it off when we had to move." She says. I frown. "I'm sorry." I say. And to answer my question, yes. They had sex… wonder why that angers me so much. I shake my head to clear it. "Oh, don't be. Things were going down hill anyway… I'm just happy we could stay friends." She says.

I smile, Alice is so… cute, adorable, kind. Gosh, does this girl have a mean bone in her body? "That's… nice." I say. She shrugs. "Um what else… Oh, my favorite color is Yellow." She says and I crinckle my nose in distaste. "You have got to be kidding me." I say.

She frowns. "Whats wrong with yellow?" She asks. I raise an eyebrow. "Better question is to ask what's right with it. It's a horrible color." I say. She gasps at me. "Tweety is yellow!" she says. I nod. "Yeah. That's a boy who will never get his balls back." I say.

Alice gasps at me. "Tweety is a girl!" She says. I frown. "No… he's a boy." I say. She looks at me in shock. "She is not a boy!" She tells me. I sigh and take out my phone and goggle it. I show her the screen with a smirk on my face.

"No freaking way!" She says. I laugh full heartedly a monster of a laugh. "You should…. See your… hahaha face!" I say in between guaffs of laugh. She's glaring at me but that just makes it funnier.

"You want to laugh, huh?" She asks sliding close to me. I laugh. "What are you… trying to… do?" I ask laughing. Before I can even analize that look on her face she launches at me and straddles my lap.

I look from her face to my lap before closing my eyes and laughing. She's tickling me! "Ooh, someone is ticklish!" She says loudly as she continues to tickle me. I'm laughing so much tears are streaming down my eyes "A-Alice HAHAHAH stop! AHAHA I can't breathe! HAHAHAHA!" I manage to get out.

She tickles me a few more times before stoping, her arms pinning mine above my head while I try to control my giggles and catch my breath. After a minute or so I manage to look at her and grin, her eyes are trained on my face. "What?" I ask unable to wipe the smile of my face.

She grins but shakes her head, I try to pull my arms down but Alice just repins them roughly above my head. I frown. "Alice what are you…" I trail off as I remember our position. My eyes snap to hers and our eyes meet, her eyes flash from my eyes to my lips which I instinctualy lick.

She looks back at my eyes and starts to lean forward until her face is an inch away from my face, her breath hot against my lips. I can smell her peppermint gum, my eyes flash from her lips to her eyes and they darken slightly.

"A-Alice…" I manage to get out. She sends me a soft smile. "You have a beautiful smile." She says. I frown, my smile? My eyes flash to hers and I swallow to try to speak again. "Alice, what exactly are you doing?" I ask softly.

Her eyes darken a bit more… wait… I know that look. I see it on a girls face every time I get them… oh shit. "Alice, you don't want to do this." I say seriously to her. She leans even closer her lips almost brushing mine, it takes everything in me not to close the distance. "I'm trying to kiss you." She says against my lips before kissing me.

My restrains snap and I kiss her back hungrily. Her hands slip and it's just enough time for me to turn us over so that I'm hovering over her, I am in between her legs my hand in her hair and a hand on her waist while I kiss her.

Her hands slide on my neck and hold me to her, one hand knotting in my hair and I hum in her mouth. I relish in the feeling of her lips on mine and the feeling of the electric current running through my whole body.

I lick her bottom lip, asking for entrance. Thankfully she complies and opens her mouth to me. My tongue slides in and we fight for dominance, our tongues dancing in her mouth. I hear her hum into my mouth and I pull back a bit to bite her lips, she crashes her lips back to mine and I'm glued, I can't pull away.

Her lips are so soft, she taste so sweet. God, what have I been kissing before this girl? No kiss should ever be this good. I break the kiss to breath and travel down her neck kissing and nibbling until I hear her moan.

I freeze, my shoulders stiff. And my lips pull away from her neck, I get up quickly and step away from the couch. Alice's eyes are on mine and there not dark anymore, I open my mouth to speak at the same time she does.

We both snap our mouth's shut but I compose quickly. "A-Alice, I… I'm so sorry." I say looking at her eyes. She just sits and stands up, "B-Bella, it wasn't y-your fault." Alice says. I shake my head. "I'm so freaking sorry. I-I mean, I shouldn't have ever kissed you. Because-" I'm cut off by her.

"And why shouldn't you have ever kissed me?" She asks angrily. I open my mouth but shit, I didn't mean it that way. "I-I mean you always tell me you don't like players. I should have just known I had made you horny or something when you kissed me. I shouldn't have kissed you back." I say looking at her.

I look in her eyes and…. Shit. There black… not the good kind the fucking 'im going to kill you black.' "You just assumed you made me horny? Or that I'm horny at all?" She seethes. Shit, shit, shit, shit. Alice look, you're a great kisser I don't regret kissing you. I just regret knowing that you will regret it." I try to explain. She glares at me "To fucking late." She growls before putting her stuff in her back and walking out of the front door in to the rain.

"Alice!" I call after her walking out of the house to see her almost at my driveway. "Shit, Alice! Your going to get sick!" I yell running to her. She turns and glares at me "Bella, just leave me the fuck alone!" She yells and the shock of her words make me stumble and I slide on a mud patch and land on my ass.

"Shit." I mutter looking up to see Alice jogging away. I growl. "Alice! At least let me give you a ride!" I yell through the downpour. She ignores me and keeps jogging I sigh and get up and run after her, "Fuck, Alice just listen to me!" I yell once I'm close enough to grab her by the arms.

"Let me go Bella." She says slidding out of my arm. I reach again and grab her more tight. "Will you fucking listen to me for one second!" I yell at her grabbing both her arms tightly, but not enough to hurt her.

"I don't care what you have to say!" She says and for good measure knees me in the gut. I wez and fall on my hands and knees trying to get air. I fall to the side trying to gulp in enough air but cocke when watter goes in to my lungs.

I look forward to see Alice running down the last curb before reaching the street. I manage to get in a strangled breath and launch myself forward, I'm covered in mud and I'm soaking wet but Alice is walking alone in the corner of the street in a storm.

"A-Alice!" I cough two times trying to get the words out with a bit of air. She ignores me and continues to jog and since I know I won't get any words out of her I walk quietly a few feet behind her.

I follow her until she reaches her house and when she's on the top of the porch I speak again. "Alice." I say. She turns. "Just go, Bella." She says. I run a hand through my soaking hair. "Alice, can't we at least talk about what happened." I say in a begging voice.

"Nothing happened, Bella. It meant nothing to me, I'm sorry if you though it did but it didn't. Now just leave me alone." She says looking me in the eyes. My mouth opens to object but close again and I can feel a jab in my heart.

"Alice… if it didn't mean anything then why are you acting like this." I ask taking a few steps but still the rain pouring on me. She takes a few steps down until were about the same height. "I just wanted to see if I could play, the player." She spits out before pushing my shoulder in what was meant as softly but me being soaking wet and covered in mud only made me slip and land at the end of the porch.

My eyes are on hers and now all I can feel is anger, she played me. I should have known trusting anyone wasn't worth it. Her eyes are firm on mine and I know my face is blank. "I won, Bella. I won the bet with my siblings and I even hurt your little ego. Get out, your just making a fool out of yourself." She says before turning and slamming the door shut.

My face is still blank as I slowly get up, look at the house one more time and slowly walk away. I stop after a few steps when I hear the door open, I turn on my heels to see Alice. "Bella." She says. I take a step closer and she throws something at me that lands in the mud at the foot of the stairs where I had landed.

"There's your damn jacket." She says and slams the door shut. I stop and just look at the door and slowly walk over to the foot of the steps and grab my now soaking wet and filfy jacket.

This was it, she really did play me… and I feel right into her hand. How stupid could I really be? I clench my fist on the jacket and glare at the house before walking away in to the drive.

I walk to my house slowly, not in any hurry. I'm beating myself up, how could I have been so stupid? How in the world had I fallen for a trick I helped create? I glare at the sky. "You just love messing with me don't you, God?" I yell. Thunder roars and I smirk "Yeah… fuck you too." I say and start walk up my driveway.

Once I reach my house I peel off all my clothes on the porch and walk into the house naked and in dire need for a shower. I climb up the steps and go to my room where I take a hot shower and get the mud off my body.

I'm not shocked to see scratches, cuts and bruises on my body. Though there is one that is going to leave a scar, a small gash on my shoulder from I feel when Alice kneed me in the gut. I wince as I try to check it for anything, I shrug not wanting to go to a hospital and place a gauze with alcohol that brought tears to my eyes, I quickly take it off and wince. Not my best idea.

After I get a new band aid thingy I place it on the cut and I get dressed. After I make sure the house is locked tight I walk to my room and go to sleep. This time I fall asleep as soon as I hit the bed.

**A/N: Oh no! Alice how could you! You hurt our little Bella. Oh, well. Its needed its going to get good!... soon. Thanks to my beta Cullen Vamps for helping me out!**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: How are my story lover's doing? Loved your guy's reaction to the last chapter! Thanks to by Beta Cullen Vamps for beta-ing so fast! She's just as bad as the rest of you xD jk jk. Well… chapter 9!**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT - And - I am probably going to be giving you guy's whiplash cuz of Bella & Alice's emotions. *grins* let the games… begin!**

**Ch.9**

**Bpov**

I woke up to that horrible alarm clock, I sat up quickly and unplugged it before throwing it against the wall. Then I regretted it, my head was thudding, I couldn't breath and my shoulder burned. My bones felt like lead and my muscles like play dough.

I cough twice and wince… great, I'm fucking sick. I reach for my phone that is under my pillow and flip it over and scroll down my list of contacts and call Jenks. He picks up on the second ring. "Hello?" He asks cheerfully. I groan, how can anyone be cheery at this time of the morning?

"Hey, Jenks." I try to say but it comes out a whisper. Shit, I lost my voice two? "Bella! How are you, darling?" He asks cheerfully. "I'm sick." I whisper to the phone. "Yes, yes. I can see that, you need me to call the school for you?" He asks. "Yes." I whisper again.

He laughs. "I am sorry, but it is amusing to hear you speak so softly, especially since every time we talk you yell at me." He says amused. I roll my eyes. "Just call the damn school." I whisper.

"As you wish. Anything else I can do for you?" he asks. I sigh. "No, Jenks. Just that." I whisper. He sighs. "Alright then, consider yourself out of school for the next couple of days." He says.

With a soft 'thank you.' I hang up and slowly get out of bed to the bathroom. My clothes are sticking to me which means I sweated in my sleep… gross. I peel off my clothes and take a long semi temperature shower and get dressed in baggy sweats. I take the stuff off my bed until there's only the mattress.

I place new sheets on my bed and carry the dirty ones to the laundry where I put them in the machine. I walk down the stairs lazily not really wanting to move but the stinging in my arm is getting crazy.

I walk to the mirror and look at the cut. It looks normal so I place the patch thingy I used on it and walk to the kitchen to get something to eat. I drank some cold pills and an antibiotic for the cut and ate a piece or two of fruit then headed to my living room where I just layed on the couch listening to music.

Much to my chagrin all I could think about was Alice… I wanted to call her a bitch but… wouldn't that be the same as calling myself one. I think it's the first time I have ever been on the other side of the field but, then again.

The girls I went out with knew what to expect, they knew that I would not be with them emotionally, they knew it was just a hook up and yet they still wanted me to go out with them.

I groan, the fuck should I care? She's nothing to me and neither is her family. I bet she and Alice had the bet, but… why would Rose bet with Alice and threaten me?... Maybe she wanted to win the bet.

I shrug, not caring or feeling well enough to continue thinking about this. I just stretched lazily on the couch and closed my eyes trying to catch some more sleep, thankfully without dreams.

**OoOo**

The universe is a bitch and a big one. It's Wednesday meaning it's been three days and I have to go to school because quite frankly I'm going crazy in my house. I'm still sick only that I don't have a head throb nor do I feel quite as week but still, I feel like shit.

My voice is still gone, my cut still burns like a bitch and my bones feel weird. I get out of my warm and toasty car to the cold and damp parking lot. I shrink into my giant hoodie and place my shades over my eyes to keep the damn light from the classrooms to bug me.

I walk a few more steps until I feel a big hand clap behind my back, I turn slowly only to see Em, Rose, Jazz and Edward. I glare but I can't they can see from my shades, I cock my head to the side a sour look on my face.

Emmett grins widely. "Hey, Bella." He says. I say nothing and stare blankly at him, I raise an eyebrow. He frowns. "What's wrong?" He asks. I smirk and turn on my heals trying to ignore the furry in me, which one of them had made the bet with Alice or was it all of them?

We're they all laughing at me behind my back? Fine, I could do worse. I could do a lot worse. I grin and walk to my first class and by the time it was for Spanish I had analyzed the situation and best thing I could do was just ignore her.

I sat down on my chair and felt faint, I sigh and lean my head on the table. After a minute or two I hear the seat next to me screech in protest but I don't move, my head feeling like its going to split open.

After a minute I start to hear the teacher ramble on in her terrible Spanish. She calls me for a question and I lift my head up and point to my neck and shake my head. She frowns. "Se te fue la voz, cielo?" She asks me. I nod and give her a thumbs up, she laughs softly and asks someone else the same question.

Then I start to feel vial rising in my though and in a flash I stand and bolt to the door. I can hear her call after me but I run to the door down the hall as quick as I can and open a stall and leave it open behind me while I empty every scrap of food from my stomach. My body even though empty keeps convulsing and I find that I can't breath easy.

After my body stops convulsing and gasping I slump on the wall only to see a pair of feet behind me, I look up to see Alice. I try not to laugh at the hypocrisy, dosen't care about me yet checks on me? Bitch, I can take care of myself.

She extends her hand to help me up and with a sigh I take it, not feeling like my legs can hold me up. I flush the toilet and stumble to the sinks were I scoop up water and spit it out. I continue to do this until I can't taste a thing.

I reach for my pocket and grab a cig and light up right there and then. I walk slowly to the incapacitated stall and lift the big glass window and blow my smoke out there. I slump against the wall and wince when my arm hits the tile, shit it's swollen and it hurts like a bitch.

I close my eyes and try to breath normaly glad that the smoke clears my nostrils and I can blow smoke out of them. Somehow I still have my sunglasses on and I thank god, it helps me keep an eye on Alice while she thinks my eyes are closed. She's looking at the floor while sitting on the sink, her feet swinging.

Soon enough I get sick of the cigarette and flick it to the toilet and flush it. "Feel better?" Alice asks me. I turn to look at her to see that she is not looking at me, but at the floor. I roll my eyes and continue to walk to the door and push the door with my good hand. I hear the distinct sound of shuffing feather light feet on the ground and imagine it's Alice behind me.

I continue to walk and she speaks. "Why were you absent for two days?" She asks. I turn my upper body but still walking point to my neck and shake my head. "You really lost your voice?... I though you had made it up." She mumbles and I turn back to walk and enter the Spanish class.

"Bella, estas bien? Quieres ir a la enfermera?" she asks me. I smile but shake my head and give her a thumbs up. She looks unconvinsed and I sit down in my chair and go back to my position of lying my head in my hands with my hood brought up.

I hear wispers but ignore them and tune them out. Soon the class is over and someone touches my bad sholder blade and I flinch. I look up to see Alice again not looking at me. "Class is over." She says and walks out of the room. Why is she talking to me? She… gahh! I want to punch her… not hard. Just… I want to get my agression out.

I walk to one of my other lockers and dump my stuff in. Not caring at all and planning on cutting the rest of the day. I walk to the lunch room and look at my table, no fucking way are the Cullens sitting in my table. I walk to the lunch line and grab my food… or well drink. I only got a bottle of orange juice. I walk past my table and out to the benches and spend big part of lunch hour drinking my juice and shivering in the cold.

Why should I spend the day outside if that is MY table? My friends that sit there… well exept for the Cullens and I fucking worked hard to get that table. Getting sick of the cold I walk back in but again walk past my table and go to bimbo's table.

I see that Tanya is the first one to look up at my arrival so I walk over to her and lift her up to me and kiss her. She freezes before kissing me back and I move back and she follows, I smirk against her lips and walk to the wall and kiss her against it. I can hear the lunch room going in to chaos at my scene but I'm not satisfied by Tanya and pull away.

"W-wow…" She says panting. I smirk and pull back from her completely, I look at the table to see Irina eyeing me and for fucks sake I go to her and kiss her against the table. She's struggles a bit against me but then gives in and kisses me back, I open my eyes as I kiss her and shoot a look at my table to se that the Cullen's are looking at me with wide eyes.

Jake is confused, Leah is frowning and Seth looks like I just gave him the bigges present ever. I pull back from Irina smirking at her. "Oh, um.." She says panting. I look up to see Victoria grinning at me and she walks over to me and pins me against the wall and kisses me gruffly.

I kiss her more deeply then the rest and again open my eyes to look at my table to se Alice's shocked and hurt face. I grin against Victoria's lips and bite her bottom lips softly until I feel a tap on my shoulder. I pull away to see a teacher standing behind me shaking their head, I grin. "Bella, the lunch room is no place for a public indesency." She says. I grin wider but Tanya defend me quickly. "I bet your only saying this because of our sexuality." She says.

The teacher looks back at Tanya with shocked face and I raise my eyebrow, she looks back at me and back to Victoria and Irina who are also acting offended. "Oh, um. No, not at all. I just don't think that these actions are fit for a lunch room." She says. I laugh and shrug and walk past the teacher to my table, I plop down with a satisfied grin only to have Jake start to preach me.

With a sigh and deciding to piss him off as well I lean forward and capture his lips in mine. I grin and pull away at his shocked face and sit back down in my seat. "Bella!" Jake exclames and I just laugh. "Your fucking insane!" He yells at me and I smirk at him.

With a look at the whole table I laugh and get up from the table and wink at Alice. Before I lean to whisper in her ear. "You're not the only person in this school I can kiss, I win." I say softly. I pull back with a smirk and with that I walk out of the lunch room.

I go to my locker and grab my bag before I leave the school grounds and go to my car and drive off. School isn't necessary to me, not when your rich. Speaking of being rich I pull over around the street and text Jenks to excuse me for the rest of the week. He reply's quickly saying that it's fine and to be careful.

I roll my eyes and pull the gear. 'Careful isn't as much fun as crazy.' I muse to myself before launching my car down the road. I drive to Seattle and spend the night in a hotel there as long as the rest of the week. I got back to Forks on Monday feeing better except for the damn cut on my shoulder.

I swear! Its getting on my nerves, Iithink I reopened the wound because it started to bleed again so I had gone to some guy I know who is studying med and he patched me up, no stiches he put a weird band aid on me. I don't really give a shit as long as I don't set foot in the hospital.

I'm not sick anymore that much I know, but I can only manage to keep down small meals. Or drinks so that's what I'm eating while I sit on my lunch table. I was moving around the soup they had given to us. Jake has spoken to me and told me he is sorry for snapping and I just shrugged it off not apologizing because, I didn't feel the need to.

I groan when someone places a ruff hand on my shoulder and turn to see Rosalie glaring at me. I pry her arm off my shoulder and she takes the seat next to me. "What the fuck did you do to Alice?" she asks. I chuckle into my soup, "What I did?" I ask looking at her. She glares. "Finally, she speaks." She says sarcastically and I roll my eyes.

"Yes, what the fuck did you do to my baby sister?" She asks angrily. I smile. "As much as I have wanted to do so many things to your little sister, I have only done one and she is to cause for it." I say to her taking a sip of my soup, surprisingly its edible.

"What are you talking about?" She asks irritated. I sigh. "I know about the bet, Rose. I know you and your siblings betted on me. Happy to know she won that one." I say smirking in to my cup to get the bitterness out of my mouth.

"What bet?" She asks. I laugh. "Really? your going to make me spell it out to you, Barbie?" I ask. She glares at the nickname but stays quiet. I sigh and place the cup of soup on the table and turn to look at her in the eyes. "The fucking bet you and your siblings made that if Alice would kiss me, she made a whole scandal out of it too. Didn't she describe it?" I ask in fake joy.

Rose's eyes are knit together in confusion, I growl in frustration. "I was tired as hell, she drove my car. She took me to my house and we did homework, we talked like the best of friends then I can't remembered what happened and she tickled me and got on my lap pinning me down, then she leaned forward and kissed me. Well, I wasn't going to not kiss her back but once I thought it gotten to heated for her I pulled away only to blurt out what I didn't mean to say and she got mad." I say rolling my eyes.

"So, she stormed out and me knowing that she's so freaking small can get hurt, followed after her only to fecive a knee to the gut and a cut on my shoulder. I still followed her until your front porch where I assume you were all sitting behind snikering and laughing and then when I tried to explain to her why I stoped she pushed me off the stairs were I landed in a mud puddle and she told me about the bet. So, in other words… I don't give a shit and I'm done trying to be nice. Now get the fuck out, because if this was another bet I will beat the shit out of you." I say looking at her eyes before turning back to my empty table and drinking my soup slowly.

I had moved from table, the Cullen's and my friends stayed at my table were I moved to the loner table. I don't hear Rosalie move and with a sigh I turn to glare at her. "Do you and your family want to run me out of another table? Or get me sick like a dog like last time? I might have not retaliated but I swear if you or your family mess with me again in the slightess you will regret ever moving to Forks." I say before standing and walking out of the lunch room just as the bell sounds leaving the room behind me.

I got to biology and sit in my table and ignore everyone until class starts. I notice Edward nor Alice are in the class and that helps erase the anger that Rosalie awoke. I go to study hall and the same, Alice is not there. I shrug, she must have left. That theory was shot down when I walked in to gym to see Victoria leaning over short little Alice.

I stared for a moment before feeling guilty and walking over and grabbing Victoria by the waist and turning her to me and kissing her. I wasn't going to let her hurt Alice, I had to much of a good person in me for that. But I could just fuck with Alice's mind and think the only reason I stopped Victoria for was that I wanted to kiss her.

After Alice walks away quickly I pull away from Victoria and glare at her in the eyes. "I told you to stay six feet away from her. I haven't changed my mind." I tell her before pulling away from her and going to the locker room to change in to my gym clothes.

Coach Clap gave us a recreative hour because he's working with the guys baseball team this hour. So I went over to the punching bag and started beating the crap out of it not leaving until the coaches whistle rang. I feel a bit faint and shake my head to clear it only for it to get worse. I look at my shoulder which is throbbing and gasp when I see that my shrit is filled with blood, what I had sworn was sweat is blood.

I stager a bit and turn to see people leaving to the locker rooms. I manage to call out a 'hey' but their talking tunes me out, I shrug and walk slowly to the front part of the gym. I stager a bit more not helping that the smell is making me dizzy, that's a bad sign. I had gotten used to the smell of blood over the years but whenever the smell got me dizzy meant that I soaked in it.

I stager a bit more and the hazziness growing move until I reach the front room of the gym. I lean on the door frame to see girls walking out of the locker room, I hear some of them gasp when they see me but its not enough to catch my attention away from the haze for long.

I hear someone scream my name just as I fall to the floor, my eyes are going black in some areas but there's enough light to see Alice standing right in front of me before I black out. Fuck!

**A/N: What you guys think? Yes I know it's unlikely but hell it actually happened to my friend, only that he's a guy and not gay. But you get the picture so, how you like it? Review and I may publish two chapters today!... Who knows I feel inspired.**


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N: Pay attention wile reading or you will get lost quickly. Hope you guys like this chapter it came to me in a dream actually. It was crazy and freaky but it was cool so I made it in to a chapter. Read, Review!**_

_**I do not own TWILIGHT**_

_**Ch.10**_

_**Bpov**_

_Am I dead?... I think I am dead… I kind of hope I am dead. I won't be left behind I'll be able to see Charlie and Renee's face's again. I hope I am dead… just then I open my eyes to see a field of wild flowers._

_My eyes go wide, I know this place! It's a meadow I had found a few years ago when I first moved here… there's a big river at the last end and if you follow up, it leads you to a hot springs._

_I hadn't believed it either the first time I had found it but the water was so good I had kept it my secret… how did I reach here? I look around more clearly and almost go nuts when I see myself lying down peacefully on a blanket right in the middle of the meadow._

_I take a few steps to the direction of… myself? And call out but I don't move, shit, is this my body? But… I collapsed at the gym… hadn't I? I hadn't entered this meadow since Charlie died. It hurt to much to see it's natural beauty, so I spent most of my time drinking or smoking._

_Just then my, body opens its eyes and sits up looking around. I go in front of myself and smile, shit I am hot. I shake my head quickly when my body passes through me… yeah through me. My eyes go wide as I back up to the corner of the meadow and look at myself running from edge to edge._

_"Alice?" It calls. I glare. "**Alice? Why do you want Alice? She doesn't mean anything!" **I yell at my body. It ignores me or doesn't hear me and yells again. "Alice! Where are you?" It asks. I smirk "**Hahaha, she got lost? Peachy perfect! Now you got to find the girl before the wolf's or mountain lion's catch her!" **I snarl at the meadow._

_Then I hear a twig snap and my body moves like I did taking the offensive position Charlie had drilled in to my brain when your waiting for an attack or a threat to show itself._

_"A-Alice?" My body ask loudly, sternly, showing dominance. The only think that killed it was the damn stutter. I shake my head at myself… that makes sense right? I shrug and watch my body. **"Charlie would have slapped you silly for stuttering." **I say to my body._

_The bushes rattle and Alice pops out of it, "Bella… calm down, its just me." She says holding her hands up in surrender. I look at my body and see that it relaxes it's stance and runs a hand through its hair._

_"S-sorry, I didn't know it was you… Why didn't you answer me when I called your name? You had me worried sick." My body says. She grins. "I was, um.. using the bush?" She asks flashing my body a grin._

_Gah! It's confusing to call my body… 'my body' so lets call.. it… um… Bells. Yeah, that will work. I look back at Bells and wait for her reaction. I growl a bit when a shit eating grin crosses Bell's face. **"Why are you grinning?! I mean I know it's funny but your supposed to be mad at her!" **I yell at my- I mean Bells._

_Bells' chuckles and walks over to Alice and gives her a small hug and lifts her up, I'm shocked when Alice hugs her back and hides her face in Bells' neck. "Don't scare me like that Alice… next time just wake me up." Bells whispers to Alice's ear. Alice sighs but nods._

_I sigh and sit down on the dry grass.** "Well, Bells your dumb as shit! You fell for it… AGAIN!" **I sigh leaning against a tree. Just then Bells pulls away and captures Alice's lips in hers and I shoot up standing. **"No, no, no, no, no! Don't kiss her! Not again! Your going to fall for it again? Come on!" **I say to Bells._

_I get a bit madder when Bells lifts Alice up and she winds her legs around her hips. Bells groans and Alice smiles against her lips, I stop and turn my head to the side **"Shit… I look good making out with Alice." **I mumble before shaking my head and stepping closer. Bells walks very slowly to the blanket and lets Alice down and they slowly start to lower until Alice is on her back and Bells is hovering over her._

_There still kissing and I'm getting pissed off, **"Stop kissing her!" **I yell at both of them. I am surprised when Bells pulls apart and snuggles her head on Alice's shoulder while Alice runs her hands through Bells' hair._

_I groan and sit in front of the blanket. **"What the fuck does this mean? Your hooking up with Alice?... but, your me. So… I'm hooking up with Alice? Ah… I don't get what this is." **I mutter looking at the pair snuggling. I smile at my face a bit… I look, happy. I can tell the smile is not a fake one I had mastered over the years._

_Bells lifts her head and cups Alice's cheek looking at her eyes, and gives her a sweet quick kiss and leans her forehead on Alice's still cupping her cheek. "I love you, Alice. I love you so freaking much it kind of scares me. I… I have never been the type of girl to just love and feel it, but you…you made me take some choices in my life that brought me here and I just want to thank you. I want to tell you I love you even though I have said it countless amount of times." Bells says quietly, her eyes closed and her forehead leaning on Alice's._

_Alice smiles. "I love you too but, you don't have to be scared. I'm here and I'm not planning on changing that anytime soon… honestly I don't think I can ever love a person as much as I love you. Oh, and I love when you say you love me." She says with a coy smile. Bells smirks and leans closer her lips barely grazing Alice's. "I love you, I love you, I love you… I love you." She whispers and they kiss._

_I am frozen, what the fuck? You… her…I? I love Alice? No…I can't… I don't love anyone. I will never love anyone, no one knows how much those words have hurt me to no end. This has to be a dream, it has to be… **"What is this?"** I ask myself knotting my hands in my hair, tugging slightly._

_Something in my mind tells me, this isn't a dream… "It's the future." Charlie's and Renee's voices say at the same time from behind me, before it all vanishes._

I sit up and look around me quickly. Where the hell am I? White walls, uncomfortable bed, weird machine, long curtain and that sickly weird smell. I am in a hospital. "Shit." I mutter when I feel around me.

I have a feeling that I had a dream… I just can't remember it. I know I heard Charlie and Renee in it. So that just makes me want to know even more whatever the hell it is that I dreamt about. I try but it comes as a blank.

With a groan I lie back down on the stupid bed and look around the plain old room. I close my eyes and rest them only to hear whispers coming from outside the curtain. I act asleep "-lice how could you have done that to her?" Rosalie, I recognize whisper yells at her.

"I… I don't know, I just did. I was scared!" Alice whispers back. I wonder what there talking about. Hmm… I shrug not really caring and groan loudly so that they know I am awake. "The fuck am I?" I ask groggily, shit I am a good actor.

I even get my heart to start racing and I try to get out of the bed only to see the curtain open quickly and show Rosalie and Alice standing on the other side. I look at them with my fake nervous and crazy eyes and look around the room. "Where the fuck am I and what the hell is strapped to my arm?" I ask them.

Alice smiles and shakes her head in amusement and I just glare at her. Rose steps in and cuts my view of Alice. "Bella, calm down. Your at the hospital, you lost a lot of blood in school. You had a cut on your shoulder and it was infected which gave you slight blood poisoning but Carlisle is working on it. It looks like the wound re-opened and widened a bit." She says.

I look to left shoulder were the cut was at and see that I have stitches and some gross yellow syrup thing that stinks.. I look at my right arm to see a needle on it and on my palm. I grimace and try to hold back the whimper that threatens to come out. I fucking hate needles, anything but needles.

Just then this… really hot man walks in. "Alice, Rosalie. I need a private moment with the patient, why don't you head to the waiting room with your friends and give them the good news that she's up." He states rather then asks. I smirk, someone is pushy.

I eye him warily until I see his hazel eyes. He's Alice's dad, he is freaking doctor Cullen, the joy's of life. He walks over to me and checks a chart. "Hello, Bella. I'm Dr. Cullen. You gave us quite a scare." He says. I roll my eyes. "You shouldn't have bothered." I mutter under my breath before leaning back on the most uncomfortable bed in the world.

"It looks like you are dehydrated, malnourished, under slept, stressed, have slight blood poisoning, an infected cut and… possible depression." He says reading stuff of the chart. I laugh and snort at the depression "Yeah, your right Doc. I am depressed, no need to be kind about it. I haven't skipped my medication and have had zero thoughts of suicide." I say looking at him.

He nods and scribbles something down, "Why are you dehydrated, malnourished and under slept?" He asks. I shrug. "I was sick a few days ago, my stomach still can't hold anything for too long so it may be because of that." I say. "Under slept?" he asks. I sigh and run a hand through my hair. "I was sick, Doc. I couldn't get decent rest." I say.

He scribbles down more stuff on the chart and looks at me again. "Stressed?" he asks. I grin. "Aren't we all just a tad stressed?" I ask. He sighs. "Isabella…" He sighs and I freeze my muscles halting and my eyes meeting his. "Don't call me that." I say quickly with the voice Charlie told me throws power and authority.

He seems stunned by my reaction but nods once. "I'm sorry, so Bella. Why are you stressed?" He asks. I shrug. "I always have been. Not sure why, I don't take medication for it because I don't like being stoned 24/7." I say.

He nods once. "So, we're giving you two different anti biotic. One for the infection and one for the poison. Your lucky, if you had ignored that wound any longer the consequence's could have been worse." He says. I shrug. "Everything happens for a reason." I say and look out the small window.

He seems to have missed the slight hint of sarcasm in my voice, and I yawn. "You should sleep more, your body needs to repose." He says backing out of the room. I nod and grab the blanket at the end of the bed and grimace at the gown I'm wearing.

"If it makes you feel any better, a girl came by and brought some clothes for you. There right next to the bed. I would like to insist you only wear the bottoms because the top would disturb the wires." I nod once and he walks away.

I slip out of bed and put on my sweat pants and grin at the small comfort. Then I go to the bed and snuggle in the deep comforter someone was thoughtful enough to bring for me. I keep falling in and out of consciousness. Until I am right on the border of sleep and awake, I feel a hand slowly touch mine and because of the sparks I feel in my hand I know its Alice.

I verge more in to wakening and listen to her soft voice. "Sorry, so, so sorry. It's all my fault if I hadn't freaked out on you, you would have never gotten into the rain, we would have never fought, you would have never gotten that cut and we would be fine. But now… shit, I fucked up didn't I?" She asks.

I'm quiet, not exactly awake yet. Nah, this was a dream. I don't have enough imagination to imagine this shit. I groan and turn around and my eyes open slowly, wincing at the light. It takes me a while to focus but when I do I see Alice's head leaning on the bed and her shoulders slumped while she sits in a chair next to my bed.

I glare. "What are you doing here?" I ask. Her head snaps up. "Bella… I-I… I was just checking up on you." She says. "Get out, I don't need you to check up on me." I say looking in her eyes. I notice hurt flash through them before she moves her eyes from mine and I feel like shit, "Alice…" I sigh. She look back at me. "I'm fine, it was just… bad luck. I guess." I say.

She frowns and the last of my anger vanishes when I see her confused eyes. "Y-your not mad at me?" She asks. I shake my head. "No, why would I be? It would be like hating myself." I say with a shrug. Her semi smile drops a bit and I notice before she composes herself.

"Bella, I am so sorry for all that happened that day. I-" I cut her off raising my hand. "I don't need an apology." I say shaking my head. Alice nods. "What do you need, Bella? I… I don't know what to do. I feel like shit for what I did." She says and I chuckle and laugh.

"Why do you feel bad for what you did? We don't even know each other that well." I say to her. She frowns. "We're friends and I did that to you… I hurt you…" She says softly. I nod and move my eyes to the window. "Yeah… we were friends. I think you were one of my only friends really. You did know more about me then anyone else in this shit hole excuse for a town." I say.

I look at her from the corner of my eye and she her eyes fill with pain when I use the words 'were'. "Were?" She asks. I frown and look back to the window. "Y-yeah… I trusted you the same way you trusted me Alice. And that was the reason I pulled away when you kissed me. But… you had your own agenda, hell that's understandable. Everyone has one so, why not you?" I ask sarcastically.

"Anyway… there's… just no trust left in me Alice. I should have never even tried to trust you… it was my mistake and I'm woman enough to realize it." I say turning my head to see her. Her eyes are glassy. "Bella, please I'm begging here. Forgive me." She pleads. I frown, my whole face scrunched up in concentration.

"I… can forgive you Alice, but… the trust is just not there anymore." I say looking in her eyes. Her face falls and a small tear spills, I sigh and cup her cheek and wipe the tear away and she leans into my touch. I cherish the moment quickly until I pull my hand back.

"Alice… I think its time you go. I'll see you around." I say and look at the window. I hear Alice whimper. "Ok, I'll go… just… can you call me beautiful one last time?" She asks sadly. My head snaps over to hers to see her sad face, I frown and I want to cry at the expression of pure hurt in her face.

I cup her cheek and make her look at me and give her just a tinny bit of my emotion… what's left of it really. "Alice…" I say taking a deep breath and looking in her eyes kindly, I can practically tell my eyes are smoldering. "You will always be my only beautiful. I made you a few promises… and I'm keeping all of them. Now… go home beautiful." I say and pull her head down to place a last kiss on her soft smooth forehead and shut my eyes closed.

This shouldn't hurt so much, this shouldn't feel like my world is ending. I shouldn't be experiencing this hurt again, not ever again. I pull away from her and she straightens up, she nods once. "Good night, Bella." She says. I nod and she turns and walks out. I wait five minutes until I'm sure she is gone and let the pounding hurt flash through my body.

I don't get this, I should never have to feel this again. It should have never happened. I have only experienced this pain three times in my life and all three experiences have changed me forever… I wonder how this one will change me.

I just wish I had the chance… to get away form the pain.

**A/N: Why does Bella feel this way? Who can guess the three times she has felt this pain? Will she be able to be her old self again… or will she forever be changed?**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: So, love your guy's response to my updates! Hahhaa, im really glad you all like this story. This chapter will come as a head ache for some of you and maybe even grounds of shock. O_O but…. I like it! so HA-HA-HA! x D im tired…. And I promised two chapters so here is the second one…**

**There is a mosquito in my room driving me crazy… I am going to kill it! It shall die!**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**

**Ch.11**

**Apov**

I laugh softly when soft warm lips touch mine. I grin against them and the person pulls away for me to see blue eyes. "Hey, Kate." I say smiling. Kate smiles. "Hey, Alice." She says. I smile. "How was your weekend, hun?" I ask placing my notebook in my locker and taking out my sketch pad.

I turn around to shut my locker and lean on it while I wait for Kate's answer. "It was good… Bella was there, she got in to a huge blow out fight with Tanya." She sighs. My eyes go wide, how's Bella? Is she alright? I wanted to ask, but I had no reason too. Me and Bella hadn't talked in a month.

Sure we had all the afternoon classes together but we didn't talk aside from normal formalities like, how I was doing, was I getting bullied again, if I had done the homework, how were my siblings and that's pretty much it.

She would really glance in my direction and she had moved tables, she now sat in the loner table which had become the popular table since it was her table. I had wanted to laugh when I heard Jessica talk about it in the locker room.

She had distanced herself from everyone, my family, Leah, Jake, Seth and myself. She spoke politely to us but… would always find a way not to stay at the table until… she just left it. Not looking back, she didn't smile anymore, she didn't laugh. She wore those damn sunglasses and she smirked and grinned all the time.

She would have a new guy or girl with her every two or three days and it had increased after I had started going out with Kate two weeks ago. I would catch her staring after me in the hallway's… though that could be more because of the bimbo's. She would glare or smirk at Kate whenever they passed the hallway and she would strangely always be there when I entered study hall.

I sigh. "Is your sister alright?" I ask though I could care less how she really is. Kate looks down the halls and shrugs, "It's hard to tell. She won't come out of her room and all I could see from when she would walk out to go to the kitchen is that she has a black eye and a bruised ego." Kate says. I nod once, "That's good, it's nothing serious at least and nothing even remotely close to what Bella is capable of." I say, knowing very well Bella can fight by the way she throws combo's at the punching bag in gym.

She had entered the kick boxing club this year along with Volleyball, Basketball and Softball. I had laughed when the teacher had called Bella to be captain of all four girl teams which some how she did. She had just nodded and continued scribbling in her notebook.

I see Kate nod and she smiles. "Let me walk you to the library and I'll go to my music class." She says and grabs my hand in hers entwining our fingers. I follow, not really wanting to but knowing that she will get mad or slightly offended if I tell her so.

Kate is a great girl, she's a bit of a bitch but she tones well with it. Her hair is shorter then mine and her body is muscular from what I can tell. She is in the all four teams with Bella even though they don't really get along they share a mutual care for sports. Bella is by far more feminine then Kate.

Bella doesn't wear skirts but she does wear clothes that show of her… body. Low cut V-necks, tight shirts, skinny jeans, boots, jewelry, lipstick, make up and she always makes sure to look feminine. Kate doesn't that much, she wears loose fitting jeans that look good but some times are a bit to loose, she wears baggy shirts even though she has a skinny muscular body.

She always wears her hair in a ponytail but what gives her off is her lanky form. As Bella walks swiftly and securely, Kate walks with a stilled stumble. And where Bella speaks politely and kindly and sometimes sweet and girly. Kate speaks like Mike and Taylor, let alone she checks out ever girl that walks next to her, even when I'm next to her.

Bella, even though we were nothing but friends. Always looked at me while we were together, she would every now and then let her eyes wander but it wasn't on some person. It was around the room as if searching for danger or any sight of something uncomfortable.

I sigh when I reach the library and Kate places a sloppy kiss on my lips before heading down the hall without a goodbye or anything. I frown, wipe my mouth and go in. I sign the attendance paper and walk over to my usual table at the end of the long table were Bella sits.

We had been assigned these seats because of our names so we didn't really bug much about it. She sat at one end and I at the other. I frown when I realize I had been comparing Bella to Kate. I really shouldn't compare people, its hardly fair for them.

With a sigh I sit down in the empty table, I look around the room too see Bella leaning really close to the librarian. She's new and she's young, I think her name is Angela. Angela is blushing under whatever it is Bella is whispering in her ear and Angela laughs. There laughter runs through the whole room making everyone's head besides mine to look at them. (I had already been looking at them.) Angela blushes even more and sends Bella back to her seat.

Bella smirks at her and walks back to our table swaying her hips. Bella stops when she sees me and gives me a nod before sitting on the chair next to me instead of the one at the far end. "Hello, Alice." She says opening a poetry book she had in her hand before leaning back and I frown. Why is she sitting next to me with her back to Angela and the rest of the library?

I mumble a confused. "Hey." And continue searching through my bag for my math homework. Mr. West finds it amusing to make us suffer is my theory. I chance a glance at Bella to see her check over her shoulder before opening the book in the middle and I can see the hollowed out space, there is a wide silver flask in it. Bella sends me a wink before she grabs the flask and takes a quick drink of it. She shudders when it goes down and sighs and looks at me.

She raises an eyebrow and motions for the flask and I chance a glance at Angela before nodding and Bella smirks while she hands me the flask under the desk. I turn my back to the library and take a drink before shuddering when it hits down my though, Whisky. Nice, I need a drink if I'm going to spend the gym hour hanging out with Kate.

She's awesome but…. Being with her just felt wrong. So, I was planning on breaking up with her today or tomorrow. Not sure which would be the better choice. I was stressed, I had to change my second class from economy to drama and I think I cursed when I saw who was on the list. Victoria, Irina, Tanya and Bella. The later wasn't so bad it was the first three that made me want to puke.

I hand the flask back to Bella and nod. "Thank you, I needed that." I say to her. She smiles and nods. "Trust me, I had to bribe Angela a pretty few dollars to let me get this book in particular." She says grinning. I smile at her. "She gave you booze?" I ask incredulously. She laughs softly. "Nooo." She says but her head shaking in the 'Yes' formation.

I just laughed at her and started my math homework while Bella kept drinking and reading the first few pages of the book. I groan when I have to erase the same problem five times and Bella notices, looking of from her new poetry book her eyes a bit glazed and a silly grin on her face.

"Whats wrong A-Alice?" She asks shaking her head to clear it. I sigh, "Math should be illegal." I say to her and she laughs quietly before reaching forward and sliding my notebook to her. She grabs the pencil from in front of me and reads down what I did. She 'Pffffts' at me and points to the paper leaning forward for me to see.

"Yo-your using the old formu-la. Y-you need too um, change it." She says lowly to me, she stutters but I think that's because she is fairly buzzed. I nod. "What's the new formula?" I ask her.

She chuckles. "This." She says scribbling it down and explaining the part to me before doing the exercise again correctly. I nod finally understanding, "Ohh, now I get it. Thank you so much Bella. You should be a tutor or something." I say to her taking the notebook from her and grabbing the pencil.

She chuckles. "I was a tutor last year, but this year I wanted to focus on sports… I can tutor you if you want. On Sunday's, its my only free day but I don't think two hours a day is that much." She says.

My eyes go wide, but I nod quickly "Yeah, that would be awesome! You can come over and we can use the library." I offer. She thinks for a moment but shakes her head "You house offers to many distractions, you can just come over to my house. We can w-work on it in the library." She tells me. I nod. "Whatever you feel comfortable with, I will be there." I say and she grins.

She motions for the paper, "Finish up, its about time for gym." She tells me and I nod and get back to work every now and then asking the slight drunken Bella to help me which she always does politely. Once the bell rings signaling the end of the sixth period she stands and puts the flask back in the book and looks at me. "Wait here." She says and walks back smoothly to Angela and gives her the book and speaks to her for a moment before walking to me.

My book bag is in my hand and I look at her. "Where's your book bag?" I ask she grins. "My locker, I don't have homework." She says and grabs my bag from my hands and motions for me to walk. I smile and walk in front of her to the door which she holds open for me and I walk out.

"So, what brings you back to the social world?" I ask with a teasing tone. She smiles at me. "Honestly… I just can't stand the stupid people in this town, I think you guys are the only sane people in this damn town." She says grinning at me, her eyes still glassy telling me she's buzzed.

I laugh with her and we take the corner to see Kate leaning against the wall next to the doors. She glares when she sees me with Bella, Bella chuckles under her breath and continues to walk to the door were Kate pushes off it and stalks forward and stands in front of Bella.

"Hey." Kate says hardly at Bella. Bella smiles. "Hey, yourself." She chuckles. "Come on, we're going to be late." I say rolling my eyes at Kate. She looks at Bella but its funny because she is two inches shorter the Bella. She grabs my book bag from her forcefully, "I can take it from here, Bella. Thanks for helping Alice." She says to her.

Bella smiles. "Anytime." She says sincerely and turns to look at me. "I'll leave you two alone, see you on the bleachers." She says and walks into the gym, closing the doors behind her. I sigh and raise an eyebrow at Kate. "Was that really necessary? We finally had a conversation." I say to her. Kate huffs. "You don't need to have conversations with, Bella. You're my girlfriend." She says to me.

I laugh. "So, that means I can't have friends?" I ask eyebrow raised. Kate huffs. "You can, just not Bella." She says. I frown. "And why is that?" I ask. Kate laughs bitterly "Because at the end of the month she will be in your pants." She snaps at me.

I gap at her and smack her, "You know what? I'm done, I was going to do this tonight but your obsessing and controlling so, I'm done. I'm breaking up with you." I say and walk in to the gym only too have a hand grab my bicep and spin me around. "You have go too be kidding me, right? Your dumping me?" She asks angrily.

I struggle in her grasp, "Let me go, and stop making a scene." I tell her. She growls. "I can make a scene if I want too!" She yells at me. My eyes get wide, shit. I think she is going too beat the crap out of me.

"Yes! dammit, let me go. I am breaking up with you, get over it!" I yell back and slip out of her grasp too see people looking at us. I groan. "Great, you made a scene." I say looking at her. "Is it… is it because of that bitch?" She yells at me. I frown. "Who?" I ask. She sighs. "Bella! Is it because of Bella!" She asks.

I laugh. "No, its because your crazy!" I yell at her. She glares at me and something in her line of sight catches her attention, I turn too see Bella making out with Jasmine a cheer leader. Kate glares at me and walks quickly over to Bella and pulls her off Jasmine. "The hell?" Bella asks angrily.

"Did you kiss Alice?" She yells at her. Bella raises an eyebrow and chances a glance at me and grins. "No." She says still grinning. I don't like that grin, I don't like that grin. Kate glares at Bella. "You didn't kiss her? Are you sure?" She asks. Bella chuckles, shit. She's buzzed. "I'm sure. I did not kiss Alice Cullen." She says and smirks at Kate. "She kissed me." she says.

Kate's head snaps to me and my eyes go wide. "It was before we dated." I state. Kate glares back at a laughing Bella. "Y-you… should have s-scene your face, Kate." She says in between laughs. Finally Coach Clap shows up with a bill board in his hands, he doesn't even notice the tense air.

"Um… today are kickboxing try outs… Bella and… Denali. Get in the ring." He says and some of the people in class laugh. I groan but I won't tattle on the near fight in the gym/ "Um, Clap. I don't think that's a good idea." Bella chuckles. Coach looks up at her/ "Why would that be?" He asks.

"Yeah, Bella. Chicken?" Kate asks. That made Bella's smile go away and she straightens up and glares down at Kate. "Yes, I like to eat chicken boneless. That's what your going to be when I finish with you." Bella says.

My eyes are wide, shit this can't really be happening. "Kate, don't be stupid." I say. "Shut up, Alice. I am going to fight for you." Kate says and I snort and Bella laughs. "Kate, I don't care for Alice. If you hadn't noticed, I was perfectly happy kissing Jasmine." Bella states.

I nod in agreement Coach sighs. "Alright, that's enough you three. No practice today Denali, go to the principles office. Bella… that leaves you to fight with Maria." He states and Bella grins. "You couldn't give me a challenge?" She teases the coach. He laughs and she goes to the room were the ring is set up and she gets suited up in the girls locker room.

We all sit on the bleachers and watch as Bella gets in to the ring and so does Maria. "It's not a knock out, its just until one of you gets the wind knocked out of you. Maria… fight clean." He says.

Bella grins and places the mouth piece in her mouth and makes the hand gesture for bring it on too Maria who mutters. "Dike." Before putting on the mouth piece, Bella winks at her and starts to shit from side to side.

Maria throws a punch but doesn't land it, Bella is behind Maria and she jabs Maria's side's quickly before stepping back before Maria tried to round house kick that Bella caught. Bella pulls the leg to her and hits Maria on the helmet and shoulder before throwing the leg away but not quick enough to avoid the other leg Maria threw to hit Bella on the thigh.

Bella winces and jump steps back away from Maria and goes around and around until she lands two more punches in the gut and steps back in time to miss the punch aimed at her head. Then Maria does something no one expected, she jogs up to Bella and knees her in the gut two times. Bella is strong but damn, no one can just shake off two kicks to the gut.

Bella doubles over trying to catch her breath only to have Maria knee Bella's helmet clad head. Bella's head flies up and she stumbles back until she is hanging on too the cords for support. Coach blows the whistle but Maria charges forward and starts to land punches on Bella's gut quickly.

Bella is kneeling on the ground trying to get air and Maria brings one leg up to kick her to the side when Bella shifts and rolls and knocks Maria's legs out from under her. Once Maria is on the ground Bella straddles her lap and starts to punch her gut, chest and arms as Maria tries to cover herself.

Coach launches in to the ring and grabs Bella's arm as she's about to aim a punch to Maria and he pulls her up. "Bella, enough." He says. Bella is breathing heavily and when she looks around her eyes seem to growl large, "Shit, oh, shit." Bella breaths before she looks back at Coach.

"Coach Clap, I'm so sorry, I… I just went in survival mode. I… I had trained with my dad and when my body thinks its going to lose or is in danger I just kind of go in survival mode." She try's to explain rapidly to him.

He nods. "I understand and I know the principal will too. But I have to send both you young lady's to the principles office." He sighs. Bella curses. "Shit, Coach if I get called there again I won't be able to go out for the teams!" She exclaims pacing. Maria while all this had happened and slides out of the ring and was going to the locker room's.

Coach sighs. "I bet if we talk too him he will understand, Bella." Coach says. Bella groans and takes the helmet off before throwing it on the ring floor. "No, he wont. But, fine. I'll go, just let me get changed." She says before placing her hand on the fourth cord and jumping over it and landing on the floor lightly.

She stalks over to the other locker room and gets dressed. Coach sighs. "Well, I think that's enough for today. After I go to escort Miss. Swan, Denali and Green you are free to leave." He sighs walking over to Kate who is hiding a smirk. I want to slap her!

How can she laugh when obviously Bella had too be in pain and suffering from some trauma that took over when she was about too pass out. It was freaky yet… it was a major turn on too see Bella lose control like that.

The extra grace in which she moved and the pause before she would send the punch, the way her body wouldn't register anything other then what she was focused on, the way her dark eyes landed on me for a split second before she realized were she was.

It may sound wrong but I would need to buy new underwear… soon. We all waited quietly until Maria and then Bella walked out of the locker rooms. I went to Bella quickly. "Are you ok?" I ask. She looks at me and back at coach before she nods. "I'm good, just… I'm sorry you had too see that. I bet it freaked you the hell out." She mutters with a grimace.

I shake my head. "No, not at all. It was self defense." I say. If you only knew how wet I was you would be grinning or smirking. She offers me a soft smile before looking back too coach and sighing. "I better go… I'll see you tomorrow." She says before walking off.

I sigh/groan when she walks out of the gym. Then I smile, things are finally getting back too normal with Bella. Finally! She may have just enough trust in her too let me explain too her that there was never a bet?

Will an explanation be enough? Will she even let me explain? Will she believe me? What will happen when she knows the truth?... shit, these are all her choices…. I hope she chooses right and lets me explain that horrid lie I still can't forgive myself for.

**A/N: how you guys like this chapter? Hope you all liked it and it took a long time but things are looking up for them. No, they will not get together anytime soon I need too re-build their trust and that's not an easy thing to do.**

**Bella is working towards letting Alice talk to her, but then again she was slightly buzzed. Tomorrow ill give you guy's the next chapter and in the week end ill give you a few more. Good night!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews! Sorry I haven't responded too them, I'm hopping that this will make up for it! xD So, here is today's chapter. Its supper cool, well for me. Its interesting to see Bella in school. So, here it is.**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**

**Ch.12**

**Bpov**

I am freaking the hell out, my body hadn't gone in to survival mode since the Connor incident. I always had control over what I used my body to do, I was used to fighting and used to not being able to catch your breath so… why did my body react that way? I am currently driving too school, yesterday I had spent two hours trying to sweet talk the principal but, he wasn't giving in.

I even considered bribing him but, it was not worth it. I had been kicked out of sports this year, no kick boxing, basketball, softball, volleyball or track. Nothing. And I hate it! How am I supposed to explain my excessive work out schedule if I didn't have an excuse to do so?

Sure I could say I was getting in shape for the next year but that seemed a bit to extreme even for me. I sigh and drum my fingers to the country beat. "Until the night…she put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger and finally drank away his memory. Life is short, but this time it was bigger. Then the strength she had to get off her knees. We found her face down in a pillow, clinging to his picture for dear life. We laid her next to him beneath the willow, while the angels sang a whiskey lullaby." I sing along to Whiskey lullaby, I had always loved that song.

I sigh and pull in to the school parking in my usual parking spot. I shut off the car and grab my head phones and grab my ipod from the dash and start playing the song on it. I put my shades on and climb out of the car. I walk slowly into the school and start looking for one of my lockers.

I find one and put my shit in it before closing it and heading to the library. Angela should have two books for me today. I can't fight the smirk that makes it's way on my face, it had taken a lot of persistence but now she just listened to me and I would pay her. I grab a normal book from the shelves at the library.

I place $50 in it and close it before walking to Angela. She eyes me and I grin. "Hello, Angela." I say smiling pulling my sunglasses up and an earphone down. "Bella." She greets with a smile. I hand her a book. "I think we had a deal." I say smiling. She nods and hands me three books, my eyebrows knit together. "Why three?" I ask. She smiles and laughs softly. "I know you like to read poetry and this one is actually pretty good." She says.

I smile and nod at her. "Thanks, I'll check that out whenever I get the chance and have it back to you." I say. She shakes her head. "It's a gift actually, I have three of them." She explains and with another grin I nod and turn to leave with my two books. I slip one flask on to my jacket's hidden pocket and leave the three books in my locker. I go to the girls bathroom and chug down three gulps and pop a piece of gum in my mouth before walking to my first class.

I sneak sips and gulps in classes and in between classes and by the time lunch rolls around I'm drunk and happy. One flask is empty in my locker, in their books to take home and refill. The other is in my jacket pocket. I find Victoria in the hallway and go too her and she eyes me, "Hey, Bella." She says. I nod "H-Hey, Vic. W-whats new?" I ask with a drunken chuckle.

She looks at my face and comes closer and sniffs me and frowns. She lifts my sunglasses and frowns. "You don't smell like alcohol but your drunk, darling." She states. I chuckle and lean against the locker. "Waaat? Your crazy baby." I say. She sighs and goes to me and gives me a hug. "Your fucked up, come on. I'll take you to Jake before the teachers see you." She says and holds some of my weight.

I sigh. "Y-your so good to me, babe. L-like, not Tanya. Y-your like… awesome! And kind! You're the most… pffft' awesome-est person ever! Like shit, can I kiss you?" I ramble while she walks me too the lunch room. She sighs. "Yes, Bella you can kiss me later. But right now I need to get you too Jacob, ok sweety?" She asks. I chuckle and sigh. "Yeah… Jake… Jacob… he's… hes a good guy." I tell to Victoria. She chuckles and nods. "Yes, he is… here we go." She says and sits me down at the middle table were I pull her with me.

"Y-your awesome! And your hair!... its… its like…RED! Like a fire cracker or some shit… its awesome!" I tell her seriously. She looks in my eyes and smiles softly. "Thank you, Bella." She says. I nod and cup her cheek. "Can I kiss you now?" I ask lowly. She look at the table and nods. "Yeah, you can." She says and leans forward.

I grin and kiss her, she tried too make it short but I wasn't having any of that. I held her too me for a minute or more and then pulled away, "Bye, Red." I say as she stands up. She chuckles and looks at Jake. "She's drunk… don't know how but she is. I brought her to you because I don't know what to do, I found her stumbling around the hallways." She says.

I look at Jake amused. "Jacky Chan! What up?" I ask with a grin. He nods too me and looks at Victoria. "Do you know what she drank?" He asks. But she shakes her head and walks away. I sigh and lean my head on the table and grin at the spinning people. "Dude… you never told me you had a twin!" I tell Jacob.

He laughs. "Bella, I don't have a twin." He says and I glare. "Yes you do, he is right next to you." I say pointing at his twin. I hear laughter and that some how causes me to giggle and I fall back in my chair looking at the spinning wall.

"Dude… is she always this crazy when she's drunk." Some one asks, I recognize Emmett's voice and my good mood vanishes. I look at him and glare. "I am not drunk you crazy." I mumble. He rolls his eyes "No, of course your not." He says. I smile and nod. "Good, now… why do you look like a bear?" I ask eyeing his brown shirt.

The table laughs and I slide my shades down over my eyes again and lean forward on the table, resting my chin on my folded arms. "We need to get some food in you." Jake says and I grimace. "Not a chance, I'm enjoying being drunk way to much." I say not looking at him. "Bella, if a teacher sees you your going to get in trouble." He states.

I laugh. "Since when do I care about trouble? And besides, they can't do anything worse." I say frowning. "What do you mean?" Rosalie asks. I huff, "They kicked me out of all the sports because apparently I am mentally unstable at the moment." I grit my teeth together.

"Why, what happened?" Leah asks. I sigh. "Me and Maria fought, but 'ya know… it was kick boxing try outs… so anyway, she starts hitting me and she does an illegal move in tryouts which is to knee your opponent more then once, she hit me like… a few times and I fell to the ground to try and breathe but then she was going to hit me a-again soooo I went ape shit on her." I say with a shrug.

"She's suspended from sports for about a month but seeing as I have military training and I kick box out of school ground they kicked me out of it for the reminder of the year. And then, on senior year I need to get a mental examination too see if I am good." I slur some parts together but mostly its understandable.

Just then Alice appears and sits a few chairs away from me, I chuckle. "Hello, beautiful." I say almost normally. She nods. "Bella." She says with a smile. I grin. "You know… whenever you and your siblings decide to bet on me again. Fill me in, I'll help you win." I say with a smirk.

Her face goes blank and the whole table is confused with the exception of Rosalie who looks shocked. "What she talking about?" Emmett asks Alice. She opens her mouth to talk but I cut in. "Oh, come on Emmett. You all made a bet with Alice." I say waving him off.

Jasper asks this time. "Bella… what bet would that be?" he asks. I smirk. "The one were she had to kiss me, duh. I must say, you guys aren't exactly creative. But I must admit, Alice had me going there for a moment. I almost believed you guys were friend material, hell it was good. But… well it is what it is… you guys are just lucky I don't mind kissing our you would be fucked." I giggle drunkenly.

The table is silent and I look up to see everyone looking at Alice. I laugh. "Leave the pixie alone, she's… aw fuck I don't care." I say taking the flask out of my jacket pocket and bring it to my lips and chug two gulps before its ripped from my hands. I sigh. "Give it." I say to Jake who is glaring at me. "No, what the fuck Bella? Drinking in school is one thing but your getting shit faced dude. Your totally drunk." He says to me. I smirk and turn to Alice. "You didn't tell them?... or you?" I ask looking at Rose. The look at me with blank expressions and I laugh.

With a sigh I stand up. "You guys are good actors… or… was the bet just between you and Rose?... was that why you told me to stay away from her at the beach? Nice, you wanted to win." I muse chuckling.

Rose frowns. "N-no, it wasn't because of that." Rose says and I shrug. "Don't really care, Barbie. I should go… if I'm lucky enough Tina will be willing too go to my house and cut class." I say with a wink.

I turn and walk away… or well I try to but someone grabs my arm and brings me back to the table. I look up to see Jake in front of me, "You aren't going anywhere you are eating to get better because I will be damned if you get expelled for drinking." He says. I smirk. "Who cares? I'm a fucking millionaire, I don't need school." I say chuckling.

Jake sighs. "I know, no need to remind me. But Jenks will be mad if I he has to pay your way back into school." He says. I laugh. "He doesn't touch my money, he can go fuck… you know what… sure, if it makes you shut the fuck up give me food." I sigh tired of hearing him.

He walks away and I ignore the stares of people, before I know it Jake placed a cinnamon roll, water and a bag of chips on a tray in front of me. I give him a nod and dig in quickly after I'm full I feel a lot better and a lot less hazy. I sigh dejected, "No one ever lets me have fun." I grumble when I finally realize where I am sitting on I get angry.

I stand and without a word go out too the back and dig in my pockets for a smoke, I luckily find my black cinnamon flavor imported cigs and light one up quickly. I sit on one of picnic tables when I feel someone behind me, I freeze and try to act normal and quickly jump out and turn.

"God, Alice. You scared me." I sigh running a hand through my hair she gives me a small smile and it's timid. "Sorry." I frown too myself, but hide it quickly. "What do you want, Alice?" I ask sitting back down and taking another cig out of my pocket and offering her one.

She takes it and I light it for her and light my own. She takes a long drag and my eyes are supper glued to her lips, shit, I shouldn't want this. I shouldn't want to kiss her but, damn. The way she licks her lips and the way she grins is just addictive. Her eyes are always have that hazel shine in them and her spiky hair is done up extra crazy today.

I shake my head to clear it when she starts to speak. "So, Bella. Why exactly are you drunk and why in school of all places?" she asks me. I sigh. "Because I don't want to think about the shit that upset me and I drink in school because it sucks even more too be drunk alone." I say to her blowing smoke out my mouth.

She nods once, "You do know I have too take you home, before someone in school notices you like this right?" She asks. I sigh and bring the cig back to my lips. "Why do you care?" I ask her looking in her eyes. She ducks her head. "I…" she trails off as the three bimbos walk out and over too us.

"Hey, Bella. You feeling better?" Victoria asks. I nod. "Yes, thank you." I say too her. She grins and I look to Tanya and Irina, Tanya is ignoring me but glaring at Alice and Irina is smiling at me and ignoring Alice. "Hey, what do you guys want?" I ask. Irina laughs an obnoxious nasal laugh that makes me want to punch her.

"Oh, nothing silly. We just wanted to make sure you were good." She says. I nod not believing it. "No, I won't go on a date with you Irina. And Victoria thanks for taking me to Jacob." I say. Victoria gives me a smile out of all three bimbo's Victoria is the only one not exactly… stupid or annoying.

"But, like, why not?" Irina asks. I sigh and look at her and chance a glance at Alice. "I have a date with Alice." I lie smoothly. Irina glares at Alice. "Oh?... what about tomorrow?" She asks. I frown. "Sorry, I don't know how busy I will be this weekend. I think I have to get a conference meeting with a man who wants to make me more money then I already have." I say smiling.

She nods and sends a glare to Alice before all three of them leave into the woods. I chuckle and Alice laughs. "Why did you say you had a date with me? Their just going to hate me even more!" Alice gasps. I chuckle. "Victoria doesn't hate you, she doesn't really hate anyone, she just goes with the flow of whatever Tanya and Irina want to do even though she is the leader of the bimbos." I explain with a shrug.

"She doesn't really like me, I mean she's slept with me but she doesn't like me as girlfriend material. And Tanya is pissed at me so you don't have to worry about her for a long while. So, Irina is your only real problem and I won't let her hurt you so your good." I say shrugging.

Alice frowns. "But Victoria was glaring at me the other day at gym.." She trails off. I nod. "She was but did you notice that Irina was standing a few feet away?" I ask. Alice shakes her head and I nod. "She doesn't hate you." I say again. Alice looks unconvinced but doesn't argue, she only takes a drag of her cig.

She smiles as the smoke comes out and im curious. "Can you blow smoke out of your nose?" I ask. She looks at me and smiles a 'are you crazy' smile and shakes her head. "No… I can't." She says wrinkling her nose.

I smile and take a drag and do it, she crinkles her nose again and I laugh. "Try it, its fun." I say. She looks at me and sighs. "Fine, but if I cough don't laugh at me." she says taking a drag, I nod.

She sends me a small smile and blows the smoke out of her nose before coughing, I laugh. "Hey! You promised." She says and I try to die down my laughter. "I'm sorry, its just that… your face… its so funny… when you wrinkle your nose." I say in between laughter.

She rolls her eyes but there's a smile playing on her face, the bell in the school behind us rings and I sigh and get up, "Come on, take me home." I say. She nods and puts out the cig and walks all through the back to the side of the school and to the parking lot. I take my keys out of my pocket and get in my car and she sighs and taps my window I lower it. "Yes..?" I ask.

She fake glares at me. "Drunk driving is a no." She says. I roll my eyes "I'm just buzzed, I can handle myself." I say. She sighs and runs a hand through her short hair "That worries me." She mumbles. I chuckle. "You shouldn't care." I say to her.

She frowns, "I know… but I do." She says not looking at me, she's looking to the woods on the side of the school. "That's one big contradiction." I say grinning. She sighs. "Bella just let me drive you to your house." She says. I sigh and open the door again before sliding out and letting her get in. I close the door for her and walk then I climb in through the passenger side.

"What about you?" Alice asks pulling my car out of the parking lot. "What about me?" I ask. "Do you care?" She asks teasing but there is a serious undertone, she's curious. I sigh and think before speaking. "Yes… I do." I say. She nods and drums her fingers along the wheel. "Why?" She asks me biting her lip.

I sigh. "Wish I knew… I really wish I knew." I say looking at her. She chances a glance at me and nods. "I think we owe each other a talk." She says. I nod. "That we do." I say and now I feel a bit relieved, I'm getting answers.

**A/N: Well? What do you guys think? Good? Bad? Trust me, it was time for them to start talking! Two months of being angry… Bella just wants too let go of all that anger.**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: hope you guys like this chapter! This one I really like. Review!**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**

**Ch.13**

**Bpov**

I walk out of my car quickly and to the other side to open Alice's door for her. I still think that door would be tricky for her, she gets out offering me a small smile and I close the door and walk with her to the door. It feels weird to see her in my house, seeing as last time we split from here in bad terms.

I open the door and get in and she behind me, I take her jacket and mine and hang them. Instead of going to the living room, I walk with her to the kitchen and grab a can of Monster. "Want one?" I ask without looking behind me. "Yeah, if it's not too much trouble." She says.

I smile at her shyness. "If it were trouble I wouldn't be offering." I remind her closing the fridge with my foot and walking to the counter and handing her the can. I open mine and sit on the stool across from her and at first we just drink our Monsters in silence, until I speak.

"Ok, this is weird. Just tell me what you wanted to tell me." I say sliding my glasses down my nose before pushing them up again. She sighs. "Why do you always wear these? They hide your eyes, you have really pretty eyes." Alice says reaching forward and taking them off and placing them in between the both of us.

I chuckle. "I.. well, I know my eyes are the most expressive out of every aspect of me. I'm not sure if I'm ready to let the world know what im thinking… if not ever." I say to her, looking in her eyes. I see understanding and… curiosity.

"Well… um, I wanted to talk to you about… last time I was here." She says and immediately my guard is up. My muscles lock in to place, my jaw clenches and I can even feel my eyes go hard. I give her one nod, urging her to go on.

She takes a deep breath. "It-asa-lie." She says quickly. I frown not understanding her. "I'm sorry, what?" I say again, she sighs and runs a hand through her hair in the most adorable way I have ever seen. "It was a lie, there was no bet." She says to me. Shock is my first response but then… what if this is a lie… another bet.

"Bullshit." I call taking a drink of the can in front of me. Alice frowns. "You actually think I would lie to you about telling you the truth?" She asks me. I shrug. "From what I know, you can never really expect anything out of people." I say.

"Bella…" She trails off I sigh "What reason do I have for believing you Alice? Really? For all I know this can be yet another bet…" I trail off. "You think I would actually bet on talking to you?" she asks.

I shrug. "And how am I supposed to know that you wouldn't bet, Alice?" I ask her. She frowns her shoulders slump and she looks in my eyes, her hazel eyes shining.

"I was lying to you that day, Bella. I was scared shitless that I may be liking the schools player a little too much for my own good. Can you really blame me? For all I knew after that kiss you would just go on to the next girl – which you did - and I would just be another one of you games." She says looking in my eyes, her tone slightly angry.

I'm not sure why I am so angry about her little statement. "If that were the damn case then why the hell would I had pulled away?" I ask her. She opens her mouth too speak but its my turn. "If that were the damn case Alice don't you think I would have kept pushing until I had gotten what I had allegedly wanted? Face it! Since the first day I met you I have not tried to push you into anything for a reason!" I say to her.

She glares at me. "And what would that be?" She barks at me. I clench my jaw in anger. "Because I don't want to fuck it up! I didn't bother trying to make a move because I knew I would be shot down! Alice, I know that if I would have gone to you and asked you out on a date, all you would have thought was, 'oh, she's a player, how many people has she taken to this place, blah fucking blah.' Then you would turn me down. Why risk it?" I bark back.

She's quiet and I take that as my victory, I smirk at her. "See what I mean?" I ask in my regular voice. She's quiet again but nods once. "Your right, I would have thought exactly that." She says.

I chuckle and shake my head at her. "Oh, trust me. I've heard every single one before, 'How many people have you dated?', 'How many people do you bring here?', 'How many people did I care about'… 'How many people have you used that line on?' 'How many people have I loved,' Its all stereo typical questions." I say taking a drink from my Monster.

She's quiet and she sighs. "Bella, you have to admit even you would be weary around yourself or another player." Alice tells me. I shrug not really knowing the answer, I flash her a wink and she sighs. "Why can't we ever have a serious conversation without you flirting with me?" She asks taking a long drink of her Monster.

I chuckle. "Because, I have just spent two months being completely angry at you. So, you can't really blame me for trying to lighten the mood." I say shrugging. She nods. "Do you believe me?" She asks. I frown thinking. "I'm not sure. I want to but… I can't be sure, trust is not my forte." I say to her.

She nods. "Bella I get that… but, how do you expect me to trust you as well?" She asks. I frown. "I'm not the one lying to you or making bets." I say to her finishing up my monster. She rolls her eyes. "I know that, but how can I know that if… forget it." She says shaking her head.

"That, if we kiss I wont just play you like everyone else?" I finish for her. She nods once and ducks her head, I sigh and run a hand through my hair thinking. Do I believe her? Do I want her? Do I like her? What should I do?...

I sigh and lean forward and capture her small hand in mine, I feel the electric current that was missing for so long and offer her a small smile. "Alice… I know you may not believe me but, I wouldn't play you. I don't know another way to show you, consciously or not that I'm strangely protective of you. You can ask anyone in school if I have ever even cared about anyone, they will all say no." I say running a hand through my face.

"But you, you come along and… I'm protective. I'm talkative, I don't mind getting in a table with a lot of people. I can actually stand to have a conversation Alice, I have never tried so freaking hard to show a person that their important to me, even if I didn't know I was doing it." I say standing from the chair and going to the sink and looking out the window.

I'm angry, confused and scared shitless. "I never care… what people think of me.. but you. When the kick boxing incident happened I can just remember all through my mind all I could repeat was 'I hope she isn't scared of me, I hope she doesn't think I'm crazy, I hope she doesn't think I was dangerous' that's all I could think off." I take an intake of air.

"And in part it made me so angry to know that I actually cared what you thought… I was supposed to be mad at you, but… when I saw Kate grab your arm… I almost lost it and went over there. I was livid." I say softly. I jump a little when I feel a soft hand on my back.

"I was ok." She says. I smile and turn to look at her in the eyes. "Alice… do you have any idea how small you are? How much… pain, Kate could have inflicted on you accidentally? It made me sick to my core to see her looking at you like that…" I trail off when Alice hugs me tightly. Her small head under my chin and I tentatively wrap my arms around her shoulders and duck down a bit to hug her.

"I'm fine." She says. A laugh rumbles in my chest until it comes out. "Thank God for that, I would have to take matters in to my own hands and beat the shit out of the Denali sisters." I say. Alice gasp and pulls away. "You are certainly not fighting any of them over something about me." she says.

I roll my eyes. "Why do you think I gave Tanya a black eye?" I ask leaning back against the counter as Alice just stands there. She has a small smile playing at her lips but she shakes it off quickly. "Why?" She asks. "Well, if anyone asks its because she pissed me off. But the truth is… she pissed me off because she wanted me to call off the threat I have on them… the one that tells them not to hurt you." I say grimacing.

"I mean… how could anyone want to hurt you for no reason? I just… don't get what sick twisted things lie in the Denali girls. Irina is a fucking creep, Tanya is stupid and Kate is just… I have no words for her." I say shaking me head with a small smile.

"Bella… why do you care so much about me?" Alice asks from in front of me. My eyes snap to hers and I look away quickly out the window over my shoulder. "Um, well, you see… I…" I trail off. "Uhhhu..?" Alice says urging me on.

I sigh, why is it so hard to talk to her? Why is it now that I'm tongue tied and nervous? Why do I have this hard stone feeling in my gut and why can't I form words. Then something like a word gate snaps in my mind. And I can finally see things the clear right way.

_You like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her, you like her._

I'm so overwhelmed by the sudden words in my head that I don't control my mouth before it tells her that. "I like you." I say quickly. Just then the haze is out of my mind and my eyes quickly snap to hers where their wide and… shocked?

She's quiet and my gut twists, she doesn't like me back… Can I blame her? I mean, its me. The fucking player… Jake always told me this would come back to bite me in the ass I just never though it would be now.

I scratch my neck and duck my head. "You… you don't need to.. to feel the same way… I-I get that me… and my, um, past actions don't really speak well of me…" I trail off not being able to find my words.

I want to punch myself for even telling her that I like her. But… it was the only explanation for everything I was feeling. The way I felt when I saw Kate kiss her in the halls, the way I saw her smile at people, the way she would grin when I called her beautiful, the way my heart hammered whenever we touched along with the sparks I feel.

The sudden need to protect her, the need to know she is ok. The way I worry what she thinks and the way she opened me up about my father… it's the only explanation. I like Alice Cullen. Sadly none of that matters since she doesn't feel the same way.

I sigh and look up from under my lashes to see Alice looking at me. I offer her a small smile. "You don't need to feel the same as me Alice." I say softly. She furrows her eyebrows and opens her mouth to speak but shuts up.

She takes three steps that make her be in front of me and looks me in the eye, "Your really bad at guessing." She murmurs softly. I frown. "Why is that?" I ask. She sends me a small smile. "Because… I like you too." She says. I sigh. "You don't have to say it if you don't mean it." I tell her looking in her eyes.

She huffs. "You're so stubborn." She mutters. I flash her a grin. "Like you're not?" I challenge but instead of a response Alice just leans forward and captures my lips in hers. I freeze my actions while she just holds them there. My resolve snaps and I kiss her back, I start to move my lips against hers slowly, tentatively.

Alice takes another step closer and I wound my arm around her small waist and pull her to me while kissing her. The electricity is mind-blowing, I can't focus on anything but her lips and skin against mine.

Alice knots one hand on my hair and the other is on my back holding me to her. I'm breathing heavy and so is Alice and I decide it's better if I pull away. I break the kiss and lift my head to get much-needed air when I feel her lips against my neck and my eyes shut close as I try to focus on not whimpering.

My mouth open and closes as I try to hold back any noise that may come out of my mouth that I do not want. Finally I can try to speak. "A-Alice… what are you… fuck, doing?" I ask taking gulps of air.

"Showing you that I like you." She says against my neck before kissing and nibbling and fuck, her tongue just popped out. I groan. "Alice… go slow… I don't want to… fuck,… I don't want to lose… control with you." I say strained. I hear her giggle and it brushes against the wet marks she left on my neck.

I shudder and duck my head to kiss her again, my lips frantic and hungry as I step carefully over to the counter and lift her up so that I don't have to slouch. My lips are hungry on her already hungry lips and fuck, it feels so good.

Her legs wrap around my waist and pull me closer to her until I can feel her center against mine and I hear Alice moan in to my mouth. I whimper and pull her closer to me, my hand in her hair, the other on her back holding her to me.

I break the kiss from her lips and move down to her neck. Kissing, licking and nibbling at it, finding the spots that make her react. I find one when I kiss between her shoulder-blade and neck and grin against it while I hear her whimper.

I lace it with open mouth kisses and small mites carefull not to leave hicky. I freeze when I hear her moan and everything comes back to me. I sigh and lean my head against her shoulder as I disentangle ourselves. I hear Alice's complain but I know it's for the best. "What? Did I do something-" Alice asks.

I look up to look in her eyes and shake my head quickly. "What? No, no, no, no, no. In fact your too good, I have little self-control..." I say shaking my head. She pouts "Then why did you stop?" She asks. I sigh. "Alice we just admitted that we like each other and I don't think it would be the best to, um, fuck it up by getting ahead of ourselves." I say looking at her eyes.

She pouts but nods. "Yeah… I guess your right, I just got caught up in the moment." She says. I chuckle. "You and me both." I sigh and lean my head back on her shoulder. She speaks and I can practically hear the smile on her face. "So, does that mean you believe me that I like you?" she asks.

I laugh against her shoulder and nod. "Yeah, I do." I say closing my eyes when she runs her fingers through my hair. I shudder a bit when she gets to the top of my neck and I hear her giggle. "I think I found a reaction spot." She says, the grin evident on her voice. I grin against her shirt, "Oh, so did I." I say before turning my head to the side and placing an open mouth kiss were her shoulder and neck meet.

She shudders and I grin against that spot and trail my lips up her neck until I reach her ear and speak softly in to it. "I wonder where else I can get a reaction." I speak into her ear before taking her earlobe and gracing my teeth against it, she shudders again and I pull back to look in her eyes.

"I found two." I say grinning. Her eyes are darker and shiny. "Then… I think I need to get even." She says before winding her legs around my waist and pulling me closer to her while she starts kissing my neck and I close my eyes to relish in the feeling.

I whimper when she nibbles at my neck and she continues to kiss around until she reaches the hallow under my ear and I shudder. She pulls back and cups my cheek and I slowly open my eyes, my dark brown eyes meet her light hazel eyes and she tentatively leans forward and touches her lips to mine.

I stay still letting her take control, if she wanted to tease we would, if she wanted to kiss we would, if she wanted to talk we would. She controlled everything at the moment and I relished in it.

She slowly moves her lips against mine and I copy ever so slowly until her tongue traces my bottom one and the electricity doubled. I open my mouth and let my tongue softly touch her bottom lips. In an 'ok' form.

She then leans forward a bit more and we kiss deeply for a minute before she breaks away. I lean my forehead on hers and breathe a sigh of happiness. She makes me happy… I don't think I can fight myself anymore. I want Alice and I won't stop because I know she wants me too. No one matters but her… this, I'm sure off.

Why doesn't that scare me as much as it should?

"So… about that date?" I ask grinning.

**A/N: haha sorry, I know I said no more cliffhangers but there so much fun! I'll see if I can update twice today! If were lucky! So, what you guys think? Wasn't it just awesome?**

**REVIEW!**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: I know I was mean by giving you all a cliffhanger so I wanted to double post today to make up for it? Sound good? Here it goes… if I don't update tomorrow its cuz I am catching up on homework! xD I am so behind I have to wake up even earlier to get to school and copy of my classmates… there not that smart… so, if I don't update tomorrow don't kill'z me and yes, KILL'Z ME cuz its my new fave word.**

**TWILIGHT IS NOT MINE!**

**Ch.14**

**A pov**

"So… About that date?" She asks with a grin.

I frown/ "What date?" I ask confused. She grins wider. "The one I told the bimbo's I was taking you on." She reminds me smoothly. I nod remembering. "What about it?" I ask. "Where do you want to go?" She asks me.

I search her face and eyes to see that she is completely serious. "Your kidding." I state. She frowns and shakes her head "No, I just don't like lying and right now it's Friday. So I was wondering if you would consider going on the date… or we can just stay here and hang out." She says with a shrug.

I rack my brain around it. A date with Bella Swan… I grin. "Where would you be taking me?" I ask sliding down from the counter and she takes a step back to allow me to pass. We walk to the living room and she sits down on the couch and I sit down on the other far end. Across from her, she frowns but says nothing.

"Where would you like to go?" She asks me. I frown. "I don't know… I haven't really been anywhere." I say. Bella frowns. "Weren't you just recently dating Kate like two days ago?" She asks. I nod and she raises an eyebrow.

"She.. we didn't go out much. We just hung out or talked on the phone, we went on one date. But it rained so we had to cut it short." I say looking at everywhere except Bella. Even though I'm not looking at her, I can tell she is going to laugh. As if on time she starts howling with laughter and I can't help the chuckle that escapes me too.

"Oh my… oh my God… what a …. Tool…. I'm going…. To die." She says laughing loudly. I shake my head and Bella calms down. "I'm sorry… I am just.. shocked that she didn't at least raise some standards, she's making this way too easy." Bella says trying to die down her laughter.

"Stop laughing, it was just embarrassing." I say ducking my head and pouting. I feel the couch shift and a hand cupping my chin to make me look up. "Hey, don't be like that. I was just teasing." Bella says flashing me a smile that make her dark brown eyes shine. I give her a smile back.

"I'm just shocked she never took you out, I mean. How can anyone be so… ugh, I don't have the words for her still. Stupid, for lack of a better word. I don't understand how anyone can be so stupid as to not take you out on dates." She tells me looking in my eyes. I can feel a blush creep on my cheeks and I hear her hmm. "Your so adorable." Bella says running a thumb across my cheek.

That doesn't help me as I blush even more and I hear her chuckle and sigh before she drops her hand and leans back. I miss the contact but contain my frown, she looks at me again and grins. "So.. this date. What do you want to do?" She asks grinning. I shrug. "Dinner and a movie?" I ask.

Bella frowns. "That's to cliché for you, I mean it's nice. But it's not first date nice." Bella says frowning deep in though. I watch her face as she is lost in thought. The small pucker her lips form into, the knit of her eyebrows, the way her forehead crinkles and the way her eyes are looking at something that isn't in front of her.

I watch her in silence, there's something about Bella being so concentrated and not alert about her surroundings that is… relaxing. She's always on edge, expecting something. Right now she is totally lost in thought and I can't help but smile. Her eyes refocus and she chances a glance at me before looking back to the couch.

I smile more when I know I broke her concentration by the way her forehead crinkles deeper, she has a small smile tugging at her lips and her eyes keep flashing to mine. "What on earth are you staring at?" She asks smiling. I shrug. "You. You look so relaxed lost in thought." I say to her.

She frowns and amused frown, the kinda that says 'your fucking kidding me right?' and I just smile back at her. She rolls her eyes and offers me a small smile. "I have a great idea for a date… it's a surprise and I need to call in a few favors but it's worth it." She says smiling.

I raise an eyebrow. "It's a surprise?" I ask amused. She grins and nods "Yup." She says popping the 'p.' I frown. "Can't you just tell me what it is, so I know how to dress for the occasion?" I plead. She grins even wider. "Well seeing as the date is going to be… hmm… wear jeans and a blouse. We're not going anywhere to fancy, just a place were we can be alone and talk." She says and she grins. "Oh, and enjoy great food…. And music." She says.

I frown. "Jeans a blouse, not fancy, talk and alone, good food and music… Where the fuck are you taking me?" I ask laughing. She grins. "Disney?" She offers and I laugh at her. "We are not going to Disney." I say laughing. She frowns playfully. "Fine, that's for another time, what about… oh, I know. I'm taking you here." She says motioning for her house.

I roll my eyes. "Then why not just call this a date?" I ask waving between us. Bella frowns. "This could never be considered a date, I cannot believe you think so lowly of me." She says in mock offense. "As if I was Kate." She adds giving me a grin.

I roll my eyes "Pfft, as if you could compare." I say sarcastically. Bella frowns and her smile vanishes. Her eyes look playful as she slowly heads over to me and hovers above me, her expression looks sinister but her eyes tell me she is amused so I am relaxed.

She hovers over me and I scoot down so that I'm lying on my back and Bella grins. "What was that?" She asks lowly. My stomach clenches, shit her eyes are burning in to mine. I smile. "Nothing…" I say grinning. She narrows her eyes at me and leans forward until our lips are almost touching.

"Oh… I can be way better than Kate." She says softly against my lips. I take in a quick breath as I feel one of her legs brush against mine and one hand go to my waist and hold me there. I look up a bit to see that she is holding herself up with one hand… how strong is Bella?

She takes advantage of my head being leaned up to place kisses along my neck and I close my eyes as I relish in the feeling of her lips against my skin. I can't help but moan when she kisses the space were my shoulder and neck meet. I can feel her grin against my skin.

"Am I better than Kate?" She asks lowly against my neck. I shake my head and I hear a small chuckle before she leans forward and kisses my lips, the electricity back full blast. She leans down closer pinning me against her couch and then she breaks the kiss with a grin and a glint in her eyes.

"Words Alice." She says grazing my lips softly. "Tease." I say and she smiles. "Not what I'm looking for." She says before she kisses me again and I love this play full side of hers. Who would have thought that the player had a sweet side? I grunt when she bites my lower lips and she places a fraction of her weight on me.

I smile against her lips at the amazing feeling of her body on mine before, it's gone. My eyes snap open to see Bella hovering over me both arms holding her weight. I groan. "Come on, that was mean." I say to her. She smiles and shakes her head letting her loose strand fall on my face before shaking it so it tickles me.

I chuckle and she leans her head up. "Well… if you're not going to say it…" She says before bringing herself down on me again and this time she kisses me softly and before I can register it my legs wrap around her waist holding her to me while my hands are in her hair and on her neck.

She continues to kiss me painfully slow and I try to speed it up but she just continues that slow agonizing pace so, I do what I can think of. I grind against her and I hear her moan and I hold her too me while she grabs my waist almost harshly and pins me against the couch.

"Alice… don't push my control." She says against my lips as she continues to kiss me. I kiss her back. "Why not?" I ask before pushing against her hips with my own which only cause her to get an intake of air. "Fuuck." I hear her groan softly. I lean up to kiss her but after a minute she pulls away and hovers over me which is weird seeing as I have my legs around her waist so our middles just grinded against each other.

It made her arms give for half a second before she controlled them and held herself up. "A-Alice…" She says and with a grunt. She shuts her eyes and takes a deep breath, I sigh and disentangle myself from her. I feel her push herself off the couch. She stands quickly next to it and her eyes are trained on mine, her eyes are darker than normal and I can help but feel a clench in my abdomen.

I lick my lips and her eyes zone to it, she shuts her eyes and takes a deep breath before relaxing and sitting at the end of the couch away from me. I frown. "Aw, come on." I say sitting normally. She runs a hand through her hair and chuckles softly "Alice… its not a smart move to pull on someone who isn't used to having to wait." She says grimacing a bit.

I raise an eyebrow. "What do you…. oh." I say and she grimaces a bit more and nods once. "Yeah… that being as it was… I'm not the best in self-control." She says flashing me a grin. I smile back at her. "Who said I wanted you to be controlled?" I ask and I see her shut her eyes and take a gulp of air.

"You can't… say things like that to me Alice… you have no idea how hard it was for me just to try and ask you to stop." She says with a small smile playing on her lips. "Easy, then don't ask next time." I say flashing her a smile and I see her eyes glaze over a bit before she shakes her head. "Shit, Alice." She says in a warning tone.

I sigh. "This is really hard for you?" I ask confused. I hadn't thought it would be so hard to pull away but then again… I couldn't. If she hadn't we would still probably be making out. "Its difficult. I want to kiss you, tease you, touch you but… I know I have to… pace myself with you. Your not like the rest…" She says to me and I feel a smile make its way across my face.

My heart swells with joy at the confession and I see her chance a glance at me before she clears her throat. "Let's just say your lucky I'm not as drunk as I was this morning, no?" she says grinning. I smile at the fain Spanish accent in her 'no' and remember her mentioning it once.

"How many languages do you speak again?" I ask changing the subject. She frowns, probably wondering why I asked before thinking and answering. "Six… maybe seven." She says with a shrug. I nod.. "Which ones?" I ask and she sits down against the couch.

She thinks for a moment before counting them off her fingers. "Spanish, Italian, French, Portuguese, Japanese, Chinese and Russian." She says. My eyes are wide. "H-how do you know so many languages?" I ask in shock.

She grins. "My father though it would be appropriate seeing as I am the future head of Volturi Beer." She says. "Volturi?" I ask. She grins and nods. "My great-grandfather Aro Volturi invented it and passed it down to his son, my grandfather Marcus Volturi who only had a girl. My mother Renee married my father Charlie Swan and so my last name Swan. When my mother died she had signed the joint contract which made my father the sole owner of Volturi Venue in Italy." She says shrugging.

I nod motioning for her to continue. She grins at me but continues. "Volturi Venue being the strongest and most dominant brewery in the Europe makes everyone drink it. Especially Russians, we just opened the line for beer which is a great hit and has doubled our profit." She says to me with a shrug.

I gap at her. "Y-Your… you're the sole heir to the brewery?" I ask. She shakes her head and grins. "I'm the owner, when my father passed away last year I had made him sign the contract allowing me to step forward as head of the company. That is partly why I miss class on occasion that aren't in the past three months." She says.

I nod at her absorbing it. "So… you're a millionaire?" I ask. She nods once and I frown. "Then why stick to a crappy little town?" I ask. She sighs and looks out the window "In a strange way… this town connects me to Charlie and Renee. I… just don't have the heart in me to just up and leave." She says with a frown.

I nod slowly. "That's… wow. I don't know what to say." I tell her. She shrugs. "You don't need to say anything. But I am wondering…" She trails off with a grin while she leans forward just enough for her lips to graze mine. "What do you think about me being filthy rich?" She asks. And I can't help but laugh. "That doesn't change my views on you." I say.

She frowns. "So… me being rich means absolutely nothing to you?" She asks in disbelief. I shrug. "Money isn't a big issue, I mean it's important, essential but it's not the most important thing out there." I say with a shrug. She gaps at me before leaning close and kissing my lips. "Shit, your perfect." She mumbles against my lips.

I giggle softly against her frantic lips and kiss her back. "Hardly… I just have my… priority's in order." I say in between kisses. She grins and leans in to kiss me harder and I can't help but love it. I start to lean back seeing as she is pushing me back and then she stops and looks me in the eyes.

"Alice… if I move to fast for you… please tell me to stop." She says to me. I frown but nod. "I will." I say and she sighs and looks at me again. "Alice… I mean it. If I kiss you and… and you don't like it just tell me. Don't think…. Just tell me to stop. Ok?" She asks. I give her a soft smile and a nod before she gives me one back.

She leans down slowly and then sighs and pulls away before pulling me up and her laying down and then placing me above her. "Easier for you to control the kiss." She explains as I straddle her lap with a smile. I roll my eyes. "Suuure, it has nothing to do with me having to straddle you." I say grinning. She winks. "That is just a lucky perk." She says.

I laugh and lean down and kiss her. She is a statue under me and I pull away. "I'm not kissing you if your acting like a statue." I say and with a sigh and an eye roll she places her hand on my thigh and the other on my neck. "Happy?" she asks with a grin.

I nod and lean forward again capturing her lips with mine we kiss slowly but I can tell she is holding back, I sigh and says. "Stop." She freezes. And doesn't move, I pull back and glare at her. "Stop acting like I'm breakable. I can handle myself." I tell her. She rolls her eyes. "Alright, fine." She sighs and leans back down bringing me to her.

I grin as she starts to kiss my neck only to groan when my phone buzzes. I swear I hear Bella whimper and when I look down my leg is in between Bella's legs…. Oh shit. "Fuuuck." I hear Bella mumble as she clenches her eyes shut and is stiff as a board. I give her a small smile and reach for my phone and answer it.

"Hello?" I ask happily. I feel Bella lean forward and she starts to kiss my neck and I want to glare at her but shit… so good. "Um, sorry can you repeat that, Rose." I say. Bella freeze's and leans back with a smirk and I frown at her. "Yes! My God were the hell are you? I haven't seen you since lunch and school is over." She growls.

I grimace and lift up and sit down normally on the sofa. "I'm at Bella's house." I say. "WHAT! Are you crazy?" She growls. I roll my eyes. "Over reacting, we needed to talk." I say winking at Bella, she just grins and looks at the roof. "I get that Alice, but a talk doesn't take three hours." She says.

I frown, she's right. "Um, we had a lot to talk about. We had to catch up on a few things." I tell her. She's quiet. "You guys slept together didn't you?" She growls. My eyes go wide. "What? No! My God! Rose! Really?" I ask in shock and anger. I mean really? It's the second fucking time she thinks I slept with Bella!

"Look, I'm going to go pick you up. The guy's left to the house already and I have my BMW." She says. I pout and sigh. "Fine." I say and the line goes dead. I groan and close the phone. "Whats wrong?" Bella asks.

I look over to her. "Rose is coming over to pick me up." I say. Bella grimaces. "Niice… look, knowing Rosie she's going to be pissed and bitchy. Why don't we re-schedule our date for some other time?" she asks.

I frown. "You don't want to go out with me?" I ask. Bella rolls her eyes. "I want to, but I don't want to get you in deep shit with you protective sister. Side's… we need to take it slow. You just did get out of a relationship and are very emotional, how do I know I just didn't take advantage of your weak state of mind?" She grins.

I grimace. "One, I didn't even like Kate. Second, you're not the kind to take advantage emotionally. Thirdly, if that were the case you wouldn't be stopping us every time we got a bit.. excited now would it?" I ask with a grin.

"Fine, I'm not the type to do any of that… anymore. But I have done it in the past… not proud but I have. And you have a point… another reason why we should slow down." She says eyeing me.

I grin. "What? To tempting?" I ask. She grins and her eyes travel ever so slowly down my body. "To much for your own good." Bella says in a husky voice. I grin wider and lean forward ever so slowly and kiss her. I don't know for how long we kissed but I do know next think I know…

Rose pushes me off of Bella before punching Bella in the face. I look in horror as I see Bella's shocked face and her lips with a small cut on it. "Rose!" I yell standing up. She is towering over Bella who is leaning on the couch with her arms at her side and a shocked look on her face.

"I told you to stay away from my sister." Rosalie growls at Bella. Bella frowns and touches her lips before wincing. "Shit, dude. A bit over dramatic don't you think?" She asks her voice still laced with shock. Rosalie growls. "I told you not to bring her into your stupid games." Rosalie growls.

Bella stands and raises her hands in surrender but I can see the anger behind them. "I would never play Alice." She says. I smile and Rosalie scoffs. "How many people have you told that to?" Rose asks.

Bella grins. "Just one." She says and Rosalie frowns. "Liar." She says. Bella shakes her head. "Every single person I have ever been with knows that I am not an official thing. Alice… she's the exception. The only one if I can help it." She says chancing a glance at me.

I grin at her and she flashes me a smile before looking back to Rose. Rose looks from me to her and steps closer to Bella. "You hurt her and I will make sure you regret being born." Rosalie says to Bella. Bella grins and I bet that if it were any other circumstance she would say, 'I have regretted that for a long time.' But she doesn't, she only looks Rose in the eyes before nodding once. "I promise that if I ever hurt Alice, I will be more than willing. I won't even put up a fight." She says and both girls shake hands.

Rose walks off to the door and looks back at me. "I'll be in the car. Get in it before five minutes before I come back." She says and walks out the door. I look at the door and then at Bella. "Shit, are you ok? I am so sorry about Rose. She's never been like this." I say looking at Bella.

She just chuckles and shrugs. "I've had to deal with protective big sisters. Just be glad she gives a fuck." Bella says rubbing her lips and wincing. She frowns. "Rain check on that date?" she asks me. I frown but nod. "Best not to push Rosalie too much in one day." I murmur and Bella rolls her eyes.

She leans forward and gives me a kiss on the forehead. "I'll see you Sunday for tutoring." She says. I nod and turn to leave but she grabs my arm and hugs me tightly. "Try and be careful." She says. I grin. "I will." I say and turn to walk out of her house and into the car with Rosalie.

I buckle up and she pulls out of the driveway. I glare at her and finally she chances a glance at me. "What?" She asks. I glare. "I cannot believe you hit Bella." I say. She shrugs. "I thought she was assaulting you… then I just had to figure out my little sister fell for a player. The joys of fucking life." Rosalie grumbles.

I sigh and lean back. "I have fallen for her." I defend. Rose laughs. "Give it a month. Alice, you love too quick. It's not always a bad thing but… Bella is a person who has come to use to that anything she cares about hurts her… just don't go too fast. Because if you do, it can back fire." She sighs.

I nod and smile. "You still have to apologize for hitting her." I say and she murmurs a, "damn." And I laugh. Leave it to Rose to make a serious moment light. Who knew?

**A/N: Don't be mad at Rose, she just loves to protect our little pixie. Hope you guys like this chapter! Peace out!**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: So…. I guess you liked the chapter? *grins* here's the next one a relaxing chapter just filled with… random shit. Yup… Bella… and stuff…**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**

**Ch.15**

**B pov**

I sigh and run my hands over my face fighting a smile. "Да, сэр. Я могуесть, чтопервая партиядля васменее чем занеделю.Благодарим вас за выборВолтуриМесто проведениякак вашановая компанияликер." I say to the man. I had opened a new deal with the Russians and I was blessed out that I had convinced yet another company to go for my venue.

"Очень хорошо.Надеюсь, чтовбудущемделатьбизнес с вамитакже.Мыдолжныоставаться на связи." Says the gruff voice from the old phone at the end on the coffee table. I grin. "мы будем. Добрый день, сэр. Еще раз благодарю васза выборВолтурикак вашликеркомпании." I say to the phone before we hang up.

I laugh softly to myself. "Yes! Another Russian client." I say to myself as I dial-up Jenks. He picks up on the second ring. "Hello?" He asks. I smile. "Hey, Jenks." I say grinning. "Bella, how did the meeting go?" He asks. I grin wider. "Oh, you know. Usual… we got the contract filled he's mailing me it to sign before I send it over to you to check for mute points and what not. Starting next week we will be selling our products at the Russian Outlet Mall." I say grinning.

Jenks laughs. "That's good to hear, Bella. Shall I fill in the order and send it on a private shipment?" He asks me. I bite my lip and nod then roll my eyes at myself. "Yeah, we don't want to mess up the timing. Sent it on the private truck, I doubt their going to go through that in less than two months." I say rubbing my neck.

Jenks ruffles some papers around and I hear him chuckle. "Alright then, I'm filling in the request as we speak. Call me when anything is needed darling." He says. I smile "Thanks uncle Jenks." I say and I hear him sigh. "I love when you call me that." He says and I laugh. "I'll make a reminder to say it more often than. Later Uncle Jenks." I say and we hang up.

I slowly go through the files on the coffee table making sure the numbers add up when my door bell rings. I place the folder I was reading down and stand to go to the door, I look through the peep hold and grin when I see spiky black hair. I unlatch the lock and open the door to see Alice smiling brightly at me.

I grin. "Hey, Alice." I say and open the door wider to let her in. I look behind her but see no car, "Did you walk here?" I ask uneasy. She chuckles. "No, Jazz brought me on his Harley but he was in a rush he had a date with some girl." She says shrugging. I grin and take her book bag from her hand and help her with her jacket.

"Better him then you." I say winking at her. She rolls her eyes. "Har, Har." She says. I grin and walk with her to the living room were I frown. "Oh, sorry. I had a business conference right before you got here. Just closed a deal with some new clients." I say grabbing the folders and stacking them up.

I feel Alice sit across from me and I frown and look over to her. "Why so far away, Alice?" I ask. She's not looking at my eyes she's looking at her hands on her lap, the fuck did I do now? I finish stacking these things up and turn to face her fully. "What?" I ask. She frowns. "Nothing." She says still not looking at me. I sigh. "Please Alice, just tell me. My brain is a little mushed up because I have spent the last hour talking Russian with a man making a damn deal close." I say running a hand through my hair.

"I'm sorry if I… did something or whatever but I just… can you give me one minute to run up to the study, place these things in the safe and you will have my undivided attention." I plead to her. She nods and I quickly scoop up all my folders and walk up the stairs and reach the door to the study.

I ignore the sadness I feel when I enter the now empty study… I should be used to it. I should be working in this room instead of bringing everything down but… I can't. I look at the desk and grin a bit, I can almost still picture my dad sitting there his face hidden in a book of papers.

I sigh as I quickly open the safe and place the things in. I check to see everything is ok and close it and walk quickly out of the room before closing that door and walking down to the living room. I sigh as I sit on the couch and look at Alice. I frown and look at her closely and smile. "Since when did you have your ear double pierced?" I ask.

Her head snaps up. "Oh, um… I got them done yesterday with Rose." She says. I nod and scoot closer to her to get a better look. "And here I though you couldn't look hotter." I sigh. She giggles and I wrap an arm around her and pull her to me and kiss the top of her head. I let her out of my arms slowly and cup her cheek. "I think I forgot something when you came in." I mumble softly.

She frowns. "What would that be?" She asks. I smile at the adorable girl but instead of answering I lean forward and capture her lips against mine softly. I wince a bit my lips still a bit tender from that damn punch Rosalie gave me but the small pain can never compare to the amazing feeling of her lips on mine.

I pull back before it can turn in to anything other than a sweet kiss and I grin at her. She opens her eyes slowly a grin on her face. "How was your day, beautiful?" I ask leaning on the couch. Only to have her shift and bring my head down to her lap while she runs her fingers through my hair, I grin at the view.

"Eyes up here, perv." She says laughing. I frown, " You can't really expect me not to look now can you?" I ask looking in her eyes. She rolls her eyes. "You're no better than a guy." She says and I laugh. "Hardly, a guy goes crazy over every girl. I've only gone crazy for you so…" I trail off shrugging.

She grins. "Ah? So your crazy about me?" She teases. I roll my eyes and close them while I feel her hands in my hair. "If I weren't we wouldn't be here right now." I mumble. I hear her soft giggle and relish the sound. "Your so cute." She says. I chuckle and open my eyes to look in to hers. "And you're adorable." I say.

She smiles and we stay in silence for a while just in each others presence, her hands never stop running through my hair and if she keeps this up I'm going to fall asleep. I groan. "Alice… stop. I'm going to *Yawn* fall asleep." I say. She giggles and her hand runs through my hair only to stay at the nape of my neck and it curls tugging against the hairs there and I shudder.

My eyes open lazily almost to lazily but enough to look well… not dead. "Hmmm." I sigh from the back of my throat. I feel her do it again and I smile when I shudder before sighing and sitting up. I groan and run a hand against my face to wake up. "I almost fell asleep." I sigh as I lean back on the couch my head facing Alice as I try to keep my eyes open.

She smiles softly. "I had no problem with you falling asleep, you look cute." She says. I chuckle. "No can do. God only knows when your sister will show up and take you away. I need to soak up on my Alice time." I say offering her a grin. She rolls her eyes "Rosie is with Emmett in Seattle. So we don't need to worry about her." She says.

I groan. "Alice… don't temp me by telling me Rosalie is not in the immediate area." I sigh. She giggles. "Your voice is all gravelly from sleep, it's nice." She says. I roll my eyes and clear my throat. "Sure it is." I say my voice still thick with sleep.

Alice leans forward and touches her lips to mine and I smile and kiss her back. "It is… it's kinda sexy." Alice says before kissing me again. I groan into her mouth and pull her over me while I lie down on the couch, I kiss her passionately. Shit, I never knew kissing could feel this good. I 'hmm' when Alice almost bites my lips, I lick her bottom lip only to have her suck it into her mouth where she humms and we fight for dominance in her mouth.

I can't fight the moan that breaks through when she knots her hand in my hair and straddles my lap. "Alice…" I sigh kissing her. My lips glued to hers, I can't… I can't pull away. Why would I ever want to?... A minute or so passes until 'Good Bella' shows up and makes me pull away from her and hide my head in her neck.

We're both panting and when I lean my head back she places her head on my shoulder and together we try to find the air that is needed in our lungs. "Wow.." I say when I finally catch my breath. I hear and feel her giggle. "What?" she asks. It's muffled by my shoulder, I smile. "You're a great kisser Alice. Hands down the best kisser I have ever met." I say to her.

I hear her giggle before she sighs and leans up and I slide up to get her off my waist before the position got to tempting for 'Bad Bella' to handle. I chuckle at myself and smile at Alice. "Your just saying that." She says rolling her eyes. I sigh. "If I was, I wouldn't have said it." I say and she nods.

I yawn again and Alice frowns and leans forward to cup my face in her soft warm hands. "When was the last time you slept Bella?" She asks me. I frown for a second before shrugging. "I slept like crap Friday so… Thursday maybe." I say with a shrug. "What about last night?" she asks.

"Oh, I haven't slept all night. Different time zones Russia and USA so to make my client more… comfortable I talked to him on his time." I say yawning again. She frowns "That's not healthy Bella." She says. I shrug. "It's healthy for business." I say giving her a smile. She rolls her eyes and stands and grabs my hand before walking to the stairs.

"Where are we going?" I ask amused as I let her drag me up the stairs. "To your room, you need sleep." She tells me. I zone out Alice… in my bed?... In my arms… Shit, that's a hot image…Alice in my bed… hmm…Snap out of it! I save myself shaking my head and letting her tow me to my third floor were she gets lost not remembering where my room was.

I chuckle and point to the deep brown doors and she nods before marching in there and walking me over to my bed where she takes her shoes off and places them on the floor and she climbs on the bed and sits Indian style waiting for me to join her. I kick off my shoes and crawl on the bed until I am lying right next to Alice's Indian style crossed legs.

I lay sideways to be able to see her and then she lies down next to me and half her head is hidden by the pillow before she snuggles her head in it. "Hmm, they smell like you." She hmms and I chuckle. I decide to let Alice stop me if she wishes before I wrap an arm around her waist and pull her close to me so that we're sharing a pillow. Her warm body next to mine I huddle in deeper. "Your so warm." I mumble nuzzling her neck.

Alice sighs and runs lazy fingers through my hair. I sigh as I snuggle in so perfectly to her neck and relish in her warmth. Even her warmth is different then the rest of the people I have been with… her warmth is welcoming and soothing. I could barely stand snuggling with other people yet here I am snuggling so perfectly with Alice.

I hmm in the back of my throat when she lets her nails scratch against my scalp. "Sleep Bella… I'll be here when you wake up." She says soothingly before she starts to sing softly. I feel myself getting more lost in sleep so I do what I want and pull her impossibly closer until flush against her front and I place a soft kiss on her lips before ducking her head under my chin and let her fingers in my hair and her soft melodic voice drags me to sleep…

**Apov**

Bella fell sleep holding me about two hours ago. I'm so comfortable in her arms, I don't want to move ever. I fit perfectly in her arms, she had shifted over to her back an hour ago and now my head was in her chest listening to hear heat beat while I try to be as quiet as can be.

I'm so happy right now, it's stupid. I can't fight the smile on my lips and I can't fight off how it gets bigger every time Bella's arms wrap around me tighter for a second as if checking to see I'm still there before sighing and mumbling something before falling back into deep sleep.

I wonder if she knew she sleep talked? I know she does… she's been mumbling and talking for at least an hour. Some things are random like 'no, not the duck.' Or 'Russians and their beer' both had caused me to go in a fit off giggles.

Then there was when she had said… or maybe it was moan? Either way she moaned my name like six times. I couldn't fight the grin off my face as I would hear her speak nonsense like "math", "evil clown", "Alice", "duck", "book", "Alice", "piano", "Cookie", "Alice" and other crazy shit.

I would just chuckle until she mumbled a whole sentence. "My Alice… she's mine, get away." She mumbles shaking her head a bit. I lift my head cautiously slowly off her chest and look at her… 'my Alice?... she's mine, get away?' … I didn't know Bella thought of me this way… I don't know why but the possessive voice in which she spoke in her sleep was a major turn on.

All my mind could register was her calling me her's. I didn't know what to think… we aren't even a couple… hell we just got together two days ago but… I can't help but like say it. It made me feel special and a little less of my small disbelief vanished, Rose's words keeps flashing in my head ever once in a while but…. If she was right…. How could this feel so right?

She had to be wrong because…. Nothing I have ever felt before can compare to the way I feel right now in her arms around me… I feel happy and protected. I shake my head. "Rose is crazy. She doesn't understand us." I sigh as I lower my head softly back to Bella's chest and lay my ear above her heart hearing the steady rhythm of it beating.

I don't know how but I feel asleep, I was so relaxed I didn't want to move but… the bed was cold. I stretched a bit and touched around the bed and didn't feel anything just when I was about to lift my head up I felt a warm hand come on mine and a strong scent of cinnamon filled the air.

I groan softly and turn and open my eyes to a dark room. I lift my head a bit and a small light catches my eye. It's red, like a cigarette end… it is a cig end and I can see in the faint light that Bella's back is facing me as she smokes quietly. The ashes I assume go to an ash tray close around her.

I clear my throat softly to make her look at me and her head turns and she offers me a small smile. "Hey… your up. I'm sorry if I woke you up. I just needed a smoke, go back to bed." She says softly.

I rub my fist against my eye to clear it better and Bella chuckles. "If I give you a binky and a small blanket will you do that again?" She asks. I chuckle and shake my head. "Sorry Hun, but no." I say, my voice still thick with sleep.

Bella nods and blows out smoke from her mouth, careful not to aim it anywhere near me. I hadn't noticed that there is a window just above her bed were she is blowing the smoke out. She takes one drag of the almost finished cig and when she pulls it away from her lips I grab her hand and direct it to my mouth and I take a drag.

I haven't smoked in almost a month, I was dying. Kate had thrown out my cigs saying that if I wanted to die so be it but to not drag her down with her or some crap like that. I was so mad but, it was a new relationship I wanted it to work. Now… I'm happy it didn't.

I let Bella pull the cig away from my mouth while I hold in the smoke until it burns and then I blow it out of the window. "You just keep getting hotter and hotter to me." Bella says taking a drag before holding the cig out to me only for me to take a pull like the first and I see Bella smile.

"You're so beautiful." She sighs cupping my cheek and running a thumb against my cheek. I smile softly and kiss her palm before pulling away to lean back to blow the smoke out the window. I look back to see Bella put out the cig and I lick my lips. "What brand are these? I love them, I don't think I have ever had cinnamon flavor cigarets until now." I say.

She chuckles. "Their imported, here." She says and leans to her night stand and takes out three packs and hands them to me. I shake my head at her but only to have her stick them in my hand. "I have like six boxes in my closet. I would give you one but I don't think your parents would like me to well if they found out I was giving you cigarets as a gift." She says giving me a wink.

I giggle and shrug. "They don't really care, they always tell us that whatever we choose to do with our body's is our own responsibility. Even so I'm not a pack a day smoker, I just smoke when I'm stressed or when I'm in a thoughtful mood." I say shrugging. Bella nods and grins at me. "Wish I was like that… I haven't been able to stop in a long time… good thing is that I'm a very active person. I play all sports and actually believe it or not my doctor actually mentioned it." She says chuckling.

I frown. "Your doctor?" I ask. She nods. "I… I suffer from anxiety attacks and nervous break downs because of… certain aspects of my life. So… he offered a stress reliever… sex, pills and cigs. I took the two that I knew wouldn't fuck me up so quickly." She says chuckling, I giggle with her and lean my head on her shoulder.

"What time is it?" I ask after a moment of silence. She shuffles and there's a flash of light and she sighs. "It's eight o'clock… I went to bed at around… two o'clock and I'm assuming you feel asleep after me so we have slept for around five to six hours." She says.

I nod but snuggle deeper in to her. "I don't want to move from here." I sigh. She nods and holds me a bit closer. "You have no idea how much I wish the same." She sighs before pulling back and placing quick but sweet kisses on my lips before sighing and standing from the bed.

She stretches her hand and I take it and she lifts me up and then lowers me to the ground. "I love how short you are! It's like… perfect freaking adorable size." She says and I laugh. "At least you call it adorable, Emmett just says it's funny and calls me shorty." I mumble. Bella laughs. "Next time he calls you that just say, 'I'm not short, I'm fun sized.' That ought to shut him up for a while." Bella says with a chuckle.

We slip our shoes on and walk hand in hand down the stairs out the door and to her car. She opens the door for me and I love it, she closes it and walks around the front of the car and into her seat.

She pulls out and we talk and joke here and there but then when she gets to my drive I stay quiet and Bella notices something. "What is it, beautiful?" She asks. I smile at the nickname I had missed so much those two months and sigh. "Are we going to um… w-what exactly are we?" I ask turning in my seat. Bella nods her head and stops the car in front of my house and turns to face me.

"What do you want us to be?" She asks. I frown. "I asked you first." I state. She shrugs. "Answer the question." She says giving me a small smile. I sigh and run a hand through my hair. "Um… I don't know. I… God this is frustrating." I mumble and she chuckles. "Here, let me help your mind clear up a bit." Bella says and cups my neck before catching her lips to mine.

We kiss for a minute before she trails down my neck. "What do you want us to be Alice?" She asks against my skin. Shit… "Um… I … I don't know." I state. She places open mouth kisses on my neck and she starts to nibble against were my shoulder and neck meet and I hold back the groan.

"Alicccce." She hisses against my neck almost neck to my ear. I shudder. "Y-your girlfriend?" it comes out as a question and Bella kisses under my neck and down to my shoulder where Bella grins against my neck and pulls back.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" She asks with a smile. My face goes blank for a moment in shock before I nod with a smile. "Yeah. I'd love too." I say. Her smile grows a bit more and she leans forward to kiss my lips softly. "Are you sure?" She asks against my lips.

I nod and bite her lip and I hear her groan before she sighs and pulls away her eyes zoned over my shoulder. "I think it's best if you leave now… I think Rosalie is giving me the glare of death… Can she even see me? I mean… my windows are tinted." She says against my ear. I giggle. "Rosalie has supper radar." I joke.

She chuckles and kisses my forehead. "Go, I'll pick you up tomorrow morning. Good night Alice." She says giving me a quick kiss on the lips and reach around me to open my door. I giggle and slide out and shut the door only to hear the window go down and her call my name.

I turn and she leans forward. "For the record… your sleepy voice, very sexy." She says before pulling out and driving down the long driveway. I laugh softly at her and make my way up the porch and quickly go to my room ignoring Rose as she barks at me for whatever reason.

I close my door behind me and finally let my grin loose… I'm Bella Swan's girlfriend… Bella Swan is my girlfriend. I'm smiling so much my face hurts but I can't be given to care. I grab the three packs from under my jacket and place two in my underwear drawer and the other I open and take one out.

I go to the back of my room where my small balcony is at and light up. I take a drag and taste cinnamon… Bella… shit, I miss her already. I sigh and blow the smoke out of my mouth. How is it that I fell for this girl before we even declared ourselves? I grin when I remember her saying, 'my Alice… mine.' Maybe… maybe I wasn't the only one that fell?

Her voice echoes in my head. "If I weren't, we wouldn't be here right now." Her voice echoes… I grin. "You feel it to Bella… I just need to make you say it in fewer words…." I say grinning. I put out the cig and walk back in to my room to lay down, weird… I slept for five hours with Bella and I'm still sleepy.

**A/N: And yes…. It possible to get together so quickly. You guys need to understand that they have been crazy about each other since they met, they were just to stubborn to accept it. Now that they don't want to hide it, there's nothing stopping them.**

**Ps. My best friend had something similar to this happen. I laughed so hard when it did and she kinda inspired the whole two days after declaration couple. REVIEW!**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Hey guys! I love all of your reviews! I feel awesome! I know I haven't replyed to all of your guys reviews but just know that THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! You should see the smile on my face every time I wake up with like 10 e-mails all about this story! It like makes my day.**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT…. Wish I could make a hit book series that will sell like it some day. *grins***

**Ch.16**

**Bpov**

I wake up around five and jog through the woods for half an hour. I get back at around 5:46 and take a shower. I get dressed at 6:10 and finish everything at 6:43. I walk down to the kitchen and grab some poptarts and eat them. I drink a glass of Orange Juice and check my phone its 7:02 am.

I grin and walk out of the house making sure its locked and go to my car and start it up. I pull out of my driveway just as my phone beeps I slow down a bit and read the text. 'Bella, I'm ready whenever you decide to pick me up.' Alice writes. I chuckle and drive quickly down the road and pull up her drive and park out front. I get out from the car and lean on it while I text her 'I'm outside.' And wait.

I hear Emmett's booming laugh followed by a few other laughs and the front door opens to show Alice. I grin, she looks beautiful. She's wearing a green long sleeved turtle neck, black jeans and boots. She smiles when she sees me and she walks over to the side where I'm leaning at. "Hello, beautiful." I say smiling. "Hey, Bella." She says.

"You look beautiful as always." I say raking my eyes up and down quickly. She blushes a bit and ducks her head. "Thank you, you too." She says and I grin. "So… shall we?" I ask opening the door for her. She smiles at me and slides in placing her book bag on her lap.

I close her door and start to walk around when I stop to see Rosalie, Emmett, Jazz and Edward walk out from the door. All with a sour look on their faces, I frown and nod to Emmett but he just glares at me. I sigh, open the door and get in.

"Look's like I'm on a few shit-lists now." I chuckle as I rev the engine and pull out from her house. Alice sighs. "I told them not to do this." She growls when I see them follow me out. I chuckle. "Which one? Follow me to the school or glare at me?" I ask. She sighs. "Both." She says.

I chuckle and slow down to a crawl on the side of the road and I see the Volvo pass me and stop in front before it crawls to the side of the road. I burst out laughing. "You have got to be kidding me." I say laughing. Alice just looks pissed and its so cute!

Just then the image of an angry tinker bell comes to mind and I burst out laughing again. "You… you look like… tinkerbell… when she's angry." I say. Alice gasps at me before erupting into laughter. After a minute I calm down and look over at Alice, she's smiling at me and I lick my lips.

Shit, I want to kiss her. I look out the window, shit… their still there. I look back to Alice and down to her lips before not giving a fuck and leaning forward and capturing her lips with mine. I give her a small kiss and hmm… she taste like vanilla. I pull back and lick my lips. "Love the lip gloss by the way." I say.

She chuckles and nods. "Good to know, now come back here. I wasn't done saying hello." She says. I grin and lean forward and we kiss again. After a minute or two I hear a tap on my window and groan. "Nadie esta en casa." I say to the door before kissing Alice again.

Another tap and I ignore it, I hear my door open and I'm pulled out of my car and slammed against it. "What the fuck?" I yell at Emmett. He's glaring at me and I glare back. "Emmett, leave her alone. What the fuck, we were just kissing." Alice says. Emmett's glare grows more and I pry his hands off my jacket before I push him to the side.

"Get the fuck away from me." I growl at him. "My sister isn't a toy for your games Bella." He says deeply and menacingly. I feel a trickle of fear seeing his massive size but remain calm like Charlie had told me. If you let fear dominate you, your mind will fail you.

I grin up at him. "I never said she was." I say looking at him in the eyes. He glares and his arms flex. "Don't mess with Alice, Bella. You're my friend but she is my sister and I don't hit girls but I sure as hell wont hold back Rose if you hurt her." He growls at me.

I chuckle. "As if Rose could take me, but I get your point." I say. He looks into the car. "Straight to the school, no stops." He says looking back at me and walking away. "Buzz kill." I say to him as he walks away. I sigh and step back into my car and slam the door down.

I turn on the car and speed out of the corner of the road before he even makes it to the car. I zoom around town until I reach the school and get out of the car and slam my door shut before going over to Alice's and opening the door for her. I'm livid, there is nothing I hate more in the world then being threatened and people making assumptions.

I hate it and it just pisses me off. Alice gets out quickly and I grab her bag for her and slam the other door shut before placing her bag on my shoulder with mine and walking with her to the school. I notice Alice is extremely quiet but my jaw is tight and once I reach my locker I open it stuff my bag in it and grab my shades.

I put them on, grab my jacket and my cigs before walking with Alice to her locker. She slams her door shut and glares at me. "What is wrong now?" I ask. She frowns. "Are you mad at me?" She asks. I stare at her in shock and shake my head. "Why would I be?" I ask turning my head to the side.

She frowns. "Emmett and the others… the way he spoke to you and seeing as you didn't speak in the car or anything…" She trails off not looking at me but at her shoes. I sigh lifting my shades up before cupping her face in my hands and making her look at me.

"I'm not mad at you Alice… I… I just don't like getting threatened in general. My father always told me a threat is just a big promise and I hate it when its pointed at me seeing my history… it tick's me off a bit… I'm sorry if I'm acting rude… I'm just not used to speaking about… anything. I was such a private person its hard to just speak about things ya know?" I ask softly looking in her eyes.

She sighs and nods. "I get it, I just don't like thinking your mad at me." She says quietly. I chuckle and kiss her forehead. "I could never be mad at you Alice… even those two months… I wasn't mad at you, I was mad at me." I say. She shakes her head and hugs me and I hug her to me.

"It doesn't mater what I have to go through as long as it means I get to keep you in my life Alice." I say lowly, almost to low I don't know if she heard it. She breaks away from me and looks in my eyes before cupping my cheek and bringing me down to her. I lean my head down and kiss her softly on the lips before pulling away.

"Do you want to let the school know we're together?" I ask. She shrugs. "I could care less what the school thinks." She says kissing me again. I get lost in it and before I know it there's a throat being cleared behind me and I sigh and pull away before turning on my heels to face yet another Cullen.

"Rosalie." I say with a smile and nod. She glares at me with her icy blue eyes. "Alice, we wanted to talk to you for a moment." Rose says her eyes connected with mine. I smirk at her. "I hope it isn't about me, Rosie. God only knows how many rumors a person could stand." I say rolling my eyes and leaning against the locker.

I feel Alice's hand on my arm and I sigh and look at her and back at Rose and over her shoulder to her siblings. I look at Alice again and frown. "I'll see you in Spanish, beautiful." I say giving her a quick peck on the lips before walking down the hallway to the parking lot. I need a damn smoke before my mood goes any farther south.

I lean against the side of the building as I light up and smoke, I slide my sunglasses over my eyes finally needing it seeing as there is sun out. Hmm… maybe I should take Alice out after school. Not a date, but just hang out for a while. I groan when Irina steps in front of me. "What do you want?" I say around my cig as I check my e-mail on my phone.

"Bella… I was just coming here to tell you this ridiculous rumor that's been spread around school." She says. I lift an eyebrow. "Which is…?" I ask not looking at her as I blow smoke out the corner of my mouth. "That you brought Alice Cullen to school and walked with her to her locker. Apparently people think you guy's are together." She says as if it was a scandle.

I smirk around my cig. "I did bring Alice to school and I did walk her to her locker… and as of us being together well…" I trail off still smirking. Irina glares at me. "You're kidding right? Your… your sleeping with that nub?" She asks. I chuckle and shake my head. "Just because we're interested in each other doesn't mean we're sleeping together." I say.

Irina smirk's. "Well… whenever you get tired of her, you know where to find me." She says suggestively. I laugh. "I think everyone in Forks knows where to find you, Irina. And I don't think I'll get tired of Alice anytime soon, she has twenty times the class and value you will never have sweetie." I smirk taking the cig out of my lips and letting it in my lazy hand as I smirk at her.

She glares at me and huffs. "Well isn't the pot calling the kettle black?" She seethes. I laugh. "Honey… I never said I was worth anything. I just said Alice was." I say shrugging and bringing the cig back to my mouth. "You'll get tired of her and when you do, I'll be here." She says. I grimace. "Who said I would ever tire of her?" I shoot back.

She huffs and walks away angrily. I chuckle and lean against the brick wall finishing my cigarette before putting it out and walking to my first class. The first three periods pass by in a blur until I walk in to Spanish to see Alice sitting on our desk. I sit next to her and grin. "Hello." I say. She grins. "Hey…" She trail's off leaning closer and sniffing me. "You smell like cinnamon and strawberry's. You were smoking?" She asks. I flash her a small smile.

"Your siblings put a bit of a mood on me, I needed a stress reliever. Then I put on some perfume cause I still smelled more like smoke then I did of cinnamon." I say lowly to her as the teacher starts class. Alice frowns. "I'm sorry about them, they don't know what it's like. I told them to back off but that just seemed to make them more adamant to be protective." She says quietly.

I chance a glance at the teacher to see her grading papers while there is a few sentences on the board, the class are all having low conversations with each other and I scoot my chair closer to Alice and place a hand on her knee.

"They can try all they want, there not going to scare me off." I say giving her a grin. Alice smiles brightly at me. "You're so cute when your rebellious." She muses. I chuckle. "Cute? People like me aren't cute Alice." I say looking everywhere except her face trying to fight off my grin.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Miss player did I ruin your rep? Let me re-phrase it then. Your hot, tough, intimidating, sexy, and strong when your rebellious." She jokes. I grin at her and shake my head laughing and leaning an arm on our table. I try to ignore the throb in my center when the word hot and sexy make their way out of her mouth.

I run my thumb along her knee wanting so badly to feel her skin before I stop myself, clench my jaw, move my hand away and clear my throat. "Sorry." I say softly as I shift in my seat and look to the front of the class. I feel her hand capture mine and give it a soft squeeze. "Bella, you don't have to be afraid to touch me. It was an innocent move." She says quietly.

I sigh a chuckle. "I just don't want you to feel like… like your like the rest of the people I have been with, because it's not even remotely close to the truth. People won't believe me… your probably wont either but it's true. You're not like the rest… you'll never be." I say chancing a glance at her.

She sends me a bright smile and I stick my tounge out at her jokingly. She laughs softly and my curiosity gets the best of me. "What did your siblings want to talk to you about?" I asked. She frowns and looks at her notebook and sighs. "Nothing of importance, their just being stupid." She sighs.

I nod once not sure she's telling me the whole story. "So… do you want to go out with me after school? Not a date, just hang out in town for a while." I explain. She smiles and nods. "Yeah, I'd love too." She says. I smile. "Great, so… do you think you would be opposed to taking a walk with me during lunch?" I ask grinning. She frowns. "What about food?" She asks.

I smile. "I'll take care of it, are you in or do you want to eat in the lunch room?" I ask. She shrugs not caring. "Whatever you want." She says. I nod and smile and just then the teacher starts her class speaking quickly in her horrible Spanish. I try to hold my grimace but Alice sees it and starts laughing at me silently.

She places her hand on my knee and starts to slowly rub her thumb across my leg and I stiffen at the feeling. She chuckles and continues to run her thumb against my leg all through class and by the time its lunch I'm practically jumping from the chair. We walk out of the room and she follows me to the lunch line were we grab a few pieces of food before walking out the back doors successfully avoiding everyone.

I lead her through the think forest until we reach a small opening with a fallen log in the middle, I set our paper bags of food there before turning around and grabbing Alice by the waist. "That wasn't a nice trick to pull on me, Alice." I say lowly, to her ear. I see her eyes shine. "I'm afraid I don't have an idea to what your talking about." She says fighting a smile.

I pull her closer to me… "Really? Tempting me relentlessly in Spanish doesn't ring a bell? I ask. She grins and I bring my lips to hers kissing her hungrily. I'm in control, I won't allow myself to get out of hand but there's nothing wrong with a make out session in the woods.

Once I am sedated for the time being I pull away from her sweet, addicting and soft lips. "Lets eat, who knows how long we will have until your lovely siblings decide its time to come find you." I joke but with an undertone of seriousness.

We eat slowly, joking around and asking random questions and soon my phone buzzes from a text by Jake. 'Bring her back before her sib's have a cornea.' I laugh to myself and stand bringing Alice who was lying against me up with me. "Come on, beautiful. Let's go before your siblings send a search group for you." I tease her as we walk hand in hand back to the school.

"Their really getting on my nerves." She seethes. I chuckle. "They'll ease up eventually." I say with a shrug.. She nods once and scowls when we make it out of the woods to see the Cullens glaring at me.

"Alice… Don't push it." Edward says angrily at Alice. I sigh. "Hey now, it was my fault. I wanted alone time with her seeing as you are all so strongly opposed and damned about disliking me." I say to them. They shift their glare from Alice to me before I have a chance to defend myself Alice speaks up. "Get the stick out of your butt, stop judging because frankly I can do the same. I have never so I would like for you to return the same curtsey to me." Alice all but growls.

Her siblings watch her and I place a hand on her shoulder. "Alice, chill. Maybe I should leave- or not." I say as I see her shake her head quickly. I nod and chuckle, "Sorry, I just don't want to be the cause for a fight with your family." I say to them. She sighs. "Oh, trust me it's not you who is starting this." She says looking at them, making the message clear. I grin at the harsh under tone of her voice.

The bell rings just then and I grab her hand. "We're going to be late." I say as I tow her to the school.


	17. Chapter 17

_**A/N: Well, sorry I havent up dated as soon as I like, school, friends, work… and… sleepyness. Well, here it is chp17 of this crazy story, I loooooove the response I am getting from you guys! REVIEWS! Are almost mandatory… not really but they make me happy.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT…. Im blue daba de da, daba daba de da... did you guys know my friend was listening to this song and she painted a blue line on her wall?... shes fucked up but I love her xD my friends are a big part of inspiration for me… now enough of those crazy people I call my friends and here is the next chapter.**_

_**Ch.17**_

_**Bpov**_

A pissed off Alice is:

1. Scary as fuck.

2. Funny as hell.

3. Cute as can be.

4. Evil.

5. Hot as hell.

6. Stubborn as can be.

7. And a total tease.

I don't know wether to laugh, hide, take a picture, kiss her, hit her or fuck her. She's driving me crazy and I can't help but love and hate it. It's only been a week since I took her out to the small opening with the log and around ten minutes since we left her siblings and only around 6 since we entered class. Edward is skipping this class apparently seeing as he is not seated in front of us.

I sigh as the memory unfolds behind my eyes

_Alice and I are making out in front of my locker, her pinned against the locker by me and her hands in my hair. I hear someone clear there throat behind me and I wave them off imagining its Jake or Leah and continue kissing the addiction that is Alice. Only to feel a hand get a grip on my shoulder, I don't know how I did what I did next but I did._

_I grab the wrist and duck under the arm and pin the arm behind the attackers body, I bend the attackers arm high that if they move it, its going to cause pain and push them against the locker only to see… its Edward. I sigh and let him go. "Fucker, don't sneak up on me like that." I say fixing my jacket._

_"The hell is wrong with you?" Rosalie barks at me and I sigh. "He snuck up on me, I freaked." I say with a shrug as I go back to were Alice is at, she's glaring at the floor. I place my arm around her and kiss the top of her head._

_During this week I had learned to dislike her siblings very much, they act like I'm a fucking rapist or something. They hover over me 24/7 when I'm around Alice and when they think its enough they interrupt us and find a stupid excuse to pin it on something that I do._

_"Aw." I hear Edward wine and I chuckle. "Pussy." I murmur lowly. "Alice, see she's not safe. What would happen if she just snaped for good?" He asks her. I clench my jaw shut and drop my arm from around her._

_"The only freaking reason I am so damn jumpy in the first place is because you and your siblings are acting like I am a god damn thief." I snarl at him. He huffs and Rose speaks up. "Your just not to be trusted, you can take advantage of Alice." She says._

_I sigh. "Is anyone here forgetting one very important detail?" I ask them both. The shake their heads. "It's mine and Alice's relationship. NOT Alice, Rosalie, Edward, Jasper, Emmett's and Bella's relationship!" I snap at her._

_"We have a right to protect our sister." Edward says to me. I nod and look at a pretty mad Alice. "Babe, you need or even want protection from me?" I ask. She looks to me and shakes her head and I nod. "She doesn't want your protection! Now respect her wishes and leave us the fuck alone before I do something I might regret!" I say to him._

_"Irrelevant, she doesn't know what she needs." Rosalie says. I laugh bitterly. "She's 17 not fucking 7! She met me not a fucking outlet! Your treating us like were fucking 5 years old who just learned how to play with scissors and now discovered the magic that is an outlet!" I laugh bitterly at them._

_"Your right, your much worse then a fucking outlet." Rose says and I snap. I take a step closer to her. "You don't know a thing about me, Rosalie. You don't see me or Alice getting in the way every time Emmett tries to give you a simple kiss. A fucking kiss! I haven't touched her and yet you act like I'm the reencarnation of evil. Give me a damn chance before you make your opinion of me. From what I've seen this week all I can see is a fucking Bitch and another even bigger bitch." I say looking at Edward._

_I step away and go to my locker and grab my books and slam it shut. I see Alice standing next to me. "Bella.." She says and I give her a small smile. "We're good." I say and give her a chaste kiss on the lips. "I just need a damn smoke before I lose it." I say and walk down the hall but stop when I hear a smaking sound._

_I turn on my heels and se Edward cupping his cheek and Alice glaring at him. "All I want right now is to be fucking alone, I don't want to see any of your face's for the rest of the god damn day. You won't give her a chance to show you how she really is, your just judging her by her past. Edward if I didn't that none of you would look like saints, now stay away from me. And I swear that if any of you cost me this relationship I will forget were sibings." She says and marches away from them and to me._

_I'm shocked and I feel like crap, I don't want her fighting with her siblings over me. She reaches me and before I can regester it she starts kissing me. I don't hesitate to kiss her back but I do keep my eye slightly open in slits to be able to see her family._

_The rest of them just joined them and there all staring at me with death glares, I shrug and pull Alice closer to me and kiss her while glaring at her siblings before I close my eyes and give her a searing kiss then pull away. "Babe…I really need a smoke." I sigh against her forehead._

_She nods and grabs my hand. "Come on then, so do I." She says and I girn as she leads me to the doors out side. "Im sorry, I didn't want to cause such a reaction with your family. I don't want you fighting with them because of me." I say while I light up._

_She shrugs and takes the cig from my mouth and takes a pull. "Your not the one provoking this, they are. If anything they owe you an apology." She says bringing the cig to my mouth. I take a long pull and hug Alice to me._

_I snuggle my head in her neck and lift my head to blow smoke out. I pull away from her and grin, she grins back and blow's smoke out of her nose and I chuckle. "See! I knew you could do it." I say. She wrinkles her nose. "Still feels a bit weird." She says. I chuckle and kiss her nose and take the cig from her hand and take a long drag before stomping iit out. _

_I blow the smoke out. "Come on, were going to be late for bio." I say and with that I lead her to the classroom._

Edward not being here apparently drove Alice to do what she is doing now, I can tell she is pissed but… fuuuuck… her hand is on my thigh and she keeps running her hand up and down every single time getting closer to where I really want her.

I'm trying to focus so hard on reading that I'm glaring at the book trying to keep my breathing even, my hands are clenched on the table and my head is ducked from the teachers sight but I can see Alice through the corner of my eye.

She's staring peacefully at her book but there's a slight smirk on her lips and her eyes are dark. I lick my lips to try and talk to her when she moves her hand again and it rest just an inch away. I let out a shuddering breath and clench my jaw tighter. I get enough to whisper to her. "Alice…" I say in a warning tone. If she keeps this up… I don't know what I'm capable off.

Her smile tugs a bit more on her lips and she spreds her palm wide her fingers brushing lightly over me for half a second and I shudder and straighten up completely. I smirk, fine, she wants to play we will play.

We're supposed to start reading now so I place my book in my bag and grab Alice's hand by the wrist to hold her still. I clear my throat. "Mr. B, I think I left my book at my house." I say smoothly. He looks up from the papers he is grading. "Oh, well I think Miss Cullen won't mind sharing with you." He says looking at Alice.

She shakes her head and Mr. B nods and starts grading tests. I smirk and lean my seat as close as I can to Alice's. I lean to her ear. "Pay back is a bitch." I say huskly low to her. I feel her shudder and before she can even talk I place a hand on her back and one in her thigh. I start moving the hand on her back, placing feather light touches on her back and on her thigh my thumb start to graze over her leg.

There's a big storm outside now, which is fucking damping my mood. So much for taking Alice on a date. I see a flash of lighting and get a good idea, I smirk and wait for it. The school normally has black outs when its storming out side cause of all the damn trees so I just have to be patient and let Alice think I'm not going to do a single thing to her other then what I'm doing now.

She starts getting confident that I won't do anything to big and slides her hand up and down on my thigh again and I just grin, then the surround sound mic squeaks. "Attention, Students. Due to the storm we are shutting down the power and ending classes for the day. You are all to go to the gymnasium, were it is safer." Mrs. Coop's voice echoes through the school.

Just then the power shuts down and the rooms is dark, its my turn to make a move, I lean forward and start to kiss Alice's neck while running my hands up and down her thigh brushing across her core every time. "Stay quiet." I whisper to her ear as I continue to kiss, nibble and lick her neck.

I feel her shudder next to me and pull away for a moment to hear Mr. B. "Well class, you herd as good as I did, to the gym." He says. I push my seat back and push Alice's and I duck ourselves under the table. "Bella what are yo-" I cut her off with a kiss and continue to kiss her until I hear the door close.

I smirk against Alice's lips and pull back. "Story of the night, no light and everyone is at the gym. Alice… you really shouldn't tempt me so much." I say in her ear before turning us around so that she is pinned against the ground and I hover over her and start to kiss her neck.

My hand is on her inner thigh and shit, I want her. I need her, so freaking bad it drives me crazy. I use my other hand to knot in her hair as I kiss her and she moans in to my mouth. She bites my lower lip and my body reacts, I push against her. My body seeking friction that is greatly needed. I hear her breathing hitch and when I'm about to apologize she pushes back against my hips and all that comes out is a moan/grunt from me.

"Fuck, Alice." I murmur before bringing my lips back to hers kissing her hungrily. She knots one hand on the nape of my neck and her other hand slides to where my shirt has ridden up a bit. I feel her trail her nails against the small of my back and again my hips buck towards hers and I duck my head in her shoulder.

I hear her whimper when I buck my hips against hers once more and she moans. "Bella…" and I moan when her hips grind against mine. "Oh, shit…." I groan kissing her neck. Then my mind clicks to fucking 'Good Bella.' And I freeze and pull away quickly from her.

Alice jumps up quickly searching for me in the pitch black room, she can't see me in the corner. I lean my head back against the wall, a flash of lightning illuminates the room for her to find me. "Bella, what's wrong?" She asks walking over to me.

I sigh. "Nothing… just… let me catch my breath." I say quietly. She sits next to me and I sigh. "I'm trying so hard not to make you feel like the rest, trying to show you that sex isn't the only think I want from you but… shit. I keep fucking up." I groan.

I hear Alice shuffle closer to me, "You haven't fucked up." She says quietly placing her hand on my arm. I reach for my phone and flip it open and place it on the ground to be able to see her. "Babe, I lashed out at your sisiter, pined your brother against a locker, made you fight with them all this week, fucking almost took advange of you right now… how could I not fuck up?" I groan placing my hands on my face.

She sighs and takes my hands away from my face and making me look at her. "Rosalie provoked you and Edward scared you. They are the ones fighting with us and you didn't take advange of me if I'm the one who started it. If anything I was just playing with your self control." She flashes me a small girn.

I cup her cheek and look in her eyes/ "Your amazing you know that." I say softly. She shakes her head with a smile. "You're the amazing one, I'm just lucky." She says quietly. I give her a small smile. "Agree to disagree?" I ask. She nods once and she leans forward. "If its any consolation, I can kiss you." She says her lips grazing minie.

I look in her eyes and pull her to me a bit so that she is sitting Indian stile in between my spread out legs. "Then by all means, go ahead." I say and she brings her lips to mine in a slow sweet kiss. Our lips moving in sync and my hands cupping her face in an innocent kiss.

I break the kiss after a minute or so and sigh, "I should take you back to your family right now, I don't need them thinking I kidnapped you." I joke half heardedly. She groans. "I don't want to see them, I'm pissed at them actually." She growls and I grin. "You know, you look so hot when your mad." I say kissing her neck slowly.

"Is that so?" She asks. I nod and hum against her neck, her hand finds its way in the nape of my neck curling around my hair. I start to give her open mouth kisses on the neck. "Bella…" She sighs. I lower the neck of her black turtle neck and start to kiss her neck and sucking on it.

I nibble were her neck and shoulder meet and I hear her hmm in approval. I want to mark her, I don't know why but I want to leave a mark on her skin, letting everyone know she's mine. I want to, but… if I do it she's going to be pissed.

"Alice… I want… can I…give you a… hicky?" I ask against her neck moving my lips up and down her smooth neck. She stops for a moment and I pull back. "It's ok, if I can't. I was just wondering." I say quickly. She looks in my eyes and nods, I frown. "You sure?" I ask and she nods and flashes me a smile. "As long as I can give you one in return." She says.

My mouth falls open and my core clenches. Shit… that's hot. I bring her lips back to mine and nod against her face. "Yeah… you can… whenever you want." I say against her lips before I trail down her neck and start nibbling on it, I go back to where her neck and shoulder meet and give it a slight harder bite, she yelps in shock but her hand on my head holds me there when I try to pull back.

I bite the flesh there again and start to suck it into my mouth. When I think I have sucked enough I pull back to see a red mark on her neck and I grin as I pull away. Alice whimpers when I pull away and I chuckle, I somehow made her moan a lot while doing that hicky.

She sighs and her eyes open and there black with lust, I grin. She gives me a soft smile before leaning forward and kissing my lips. "My turn." She says against them and trails down my neck.

Her mouth is so warm and when I feel her tounge against my neck I all but almost lose it. I tilt my head to the side to give her better access and I feel her grin against my neck before sucking on the spot she had bitten.

After about a two minute, five moans on my part and three grunts she pulls away. She kisses my a few times and I kiss her back gently. "Your fucking perfect." I say against her lips. She just giggles and I pull her to me for a hug.

I see the lights flash back on and turn to look out the window to se that the storm has settled down. I sigh. "Guess our free time just let up." I say as I get up and over my hand for her to stand as well.

I grab her bag and mine and slip out of the class room and to the lockers. I stop when we reach the opening to the gym and place her bag on the ground. "When they start walking out just join them, no one will know the diference. If someone asks for me, which I know the won't just tell them I ditched bio." I say to her.

She frowns. "Why cant I just say I was with you?" She asks. I sigh. "Because your siblings will just go ape shit and we don't need another fight with them. Just listen to me this time." I say. She nods once and I give her a quick pec. "Awesome, if there's any problems just call me." I say as I start to walk. "Wait! Where are you going?" she asks. I grin. "I need to make sure the road is clear for you go get to your house safely." I say.

She shakes her head and I chuckle. "Alice, we take the same raod. I have to pass through it, I'm just going to have slight de tours." I say and with that I take the corner and slip out of the building.

I took my bike today so I don't care about getting wet. I grab my helmet and faster then I have on record I slip out of the school and go down the road. I make a few stops to clear out the road from branches or whatever. But happy to see there's nothing really bad about the road exept for a lot of fallen branches.

When I reach to the head of our street there's this huge tree that came down. I groan and get of my bike and study it. Its big and I can just push it out of the way. I grab my phone and text Alice. 'Big tree, don't leave school yet. I'm working on it.' I send before sliping back on my bike and driving home.

I grab the key's to the old truck that I have hidden in the back shed and grab the cables and the chainsaw just in case. I start it and jump "shit." I laugh when the thing roars to life. I drive rather slowly don't the road until I reach the damn tree.

I grab the chainsaw and study it for a moment… "How the fuck do I use one of these again?" I ask myself. I study it for a moment before grinning, finally turning it on. I try to cut the tree in half but my chainsaw just… died or something. So I'm half way through the damn log when it won't do anything.

I groan and take the heavy machine thing back to the car and get a fabulous idea. "Why don't I just pull the tree out with my truck?" I ask myself. I role my eyes and walk threw the rain, yes. It started raining again while I was working with the chainsaw.. hmmm maybe thats why it died?

I shrug and grab the chains I keep on the stupid truck and tie it around the middle part I had cut and wind it around making sure it wont break free. I hop in my truck again and roar it to life. I change the shift and slowly drive it forward, my truck groans in the effort but slowly starts to move the tree. I continue to drag the tree to the side of the road until its out of the way. I smile and un-hook the chains from my truck and look around, "Perfect." I mumble as I hop in the truck again and drive down to my house.

Once I get to my house I park the truck next to the old shed and place the tarp over it again. I walk back to the garage and climb on my motorcycle and drive back to school. I get off my bike and walk inside until I reach the gym. When I do I run a hand through my soaking wet hair and walk in, I search through the huge room until my eyes land on Alice.

She's sitting on the bleachers… alone. I look around and find her siblings at the foot of the bleachers glaring at me. I roll my eyes and make my way to them to get to Alice. "Where were you?" Rose asks. I smirk. "Somewhere." I say. She huffs "You know what I… What the hell is that?" She ask pointing to my neck.

I frown and cup my neck then I realize what she staling about and my eyes go wide, the hicky. "But…" She trails off and looks at Alice who is playing on her phone. "Where were you, Bella?" She asks. I shrug. "I went home for a moment to check on the bottom floors, I have big windows." I say with a shrug.

"You… you cheated on my sister?" She asks. I frown. "Why would you think that?" I ask. She glares at me. "You have a hicky on your neck that wasn't there when I left and Alice said you cut biology." She says.

My eyes go wide again, shit I didn't think this through. "I didn't cheat on your sister." I say as I start to make my way through them to Alice. Rose grabs my arm and pulls me back and I sigh and clench my jaw. If there was god up there, help me out before I lose my patience.

"Who gave you the hicky?" She asks. I smirk. "Alice did actually." I say. Her smile falters. "Alice wouldn't do anything like that." She says. And I smirk. "Maybe if you spent a little more time getting to know her rather then just assuming, you would know what she's really like." I say to her. "Are you saying I don't know my sister?" She asks. I smirk. "Not at all, I'm just telling you that you don't know her as well as you think you do." I say.

Just then an angel appears, she jumps in to my arms and hugs me and I hug her back still glaring at Rose. Until I close my eyes and smile slightly at the small girl in my arms. "Hey, Ali." I say. "Bella, I was worried, you jerk." She says pulling away and flashing me a grin.

"I'm sorry, I just needed to take care of a few small things." I say. She smile and gives me a peck on the lips then she frowns. "You're soaking wet! You are going to get sick." She says and I shake my head at her, "I am fine woman, calm down." I say chuckling. Then… Rose has to ruin our moment.

"Alice, did you give her that." Rose asks pointing to my neck. Alice frowns and turns to look at my neck before smirking. "Yeah, I did. It was so much fun." She says then places a quick peck on my neck and I shudder.

She giggles and pulls back and holds my hand in hers. "Oh… um… wow." Rose mutters and I chuckle and smirk. "Rose, I would never cheat on Alice. Sorry if I corrupted your little sister." I say in fake honesty as I place a kiss on Alice's cheek.

Alice laughs. "You, corrupt me. Hmm… I like the sound of that." She says in my ear. I groan softly. "Don't tempt me Alice." I say to her. She chuckles. "Aw, so much for my fun." She says.

I look up to see her siblings staring everywhere except us and I frown. "What's that about?" I ask her. She smiles and shrugs. "I don't know… but I like it." She says before touching her lips to mine. I grin. "Yeah, I like it too." I say and she leads me to where she was sitting and gives me a big jacket when I stare at it I laugh. "Alice, this is mine." I say and she nods.

"I like having your jacket, their always so warm." She says. I chuckle and hand it to her, she frowns and I laugh. "I'm good, trust me. I'm used to the cold, besides in five minutes their going to call us to go home and I'll just get wet all over again." I say.

She nods and gives me a hug, her small warm body aginst mine. I sit down in the corner and sit her on my lap and snuggle in to her warmth. I still can't believe this perfect little angel choose me, a fucking devil for her. She choose me and… I can't help but be thankful.

**A/N: awww, protective Bella is too cute! Hope you guys like the chapter! Ill see if I can update two more times today! I hope I can. Later people!**


	18. Chapter 18

_**A/N: What cha guys think of the last chapter? Review! Cuz I loveeee the feed back and it makes me smile!... **_

_**"You look like snoopy and you make me smile"~ Stewie Griffin**_

_**I do not own twilight, I do own this plot so HA!**_

_**Ch.18**_

_**Apov**_

I want to punch my siblings, I want to hit them and I'm not a violent person. Yesterday they accuse Bella of cheating on me and today they refuse to let me go over to her house. My siblings! Not my parents! Heavens no.

Esme can't wait to meet Bella and Carlisle already met her but would love to meet her as my girlfriend. Only bad thing is, my siblings don't want to accept her. I'm in the middle of a discussion with my siblings in another family meeting Carlisle has called to end our constant bickering.

I sigh and slump on the couch ready to ignore everything my siblings have to say. "I guess you all know why I called a family meeting, correct?" He asks in his fatherly tone. I sigh. "Because my siblings don't want me to be happy." I say looking at my nails. "Alice, I'm sure that's not true." Esme sooths.

I let out a ouch of character bitter laugh. "It's not? So, them not accepting my girlfriend is not true? Their not even giving her the chance is not true? We can't walk together for five minutes before any one of them comes over and makes a side comment about Bella. And plaintly I'm sick of it, if any of you don't want to accept her then don't."

"I don't care anymore, yes it would make me happy to have you all accept her and mine relationship but seeing as my siblings think it's more important to keep themselves happy then me. I am done trying to convince all of you to see the real her." I say standing up and walking out of the room.

I go straight to my room and slam the door shut and like the weak person I am, I start to cry. I curl up in a ball on the corner of my bed and let out all the anger and sadness caused by my family. I hear knocks on the door but I ignore it and just continue to cry until I fall to sleep.

And in my dream, I see Bella. Bella joking around, smiling and telling me she cares about me and that she will do her best to keep me happy. I snuggle in to my bed and sigh, I wish Bella was here, she always made me feel better.

Bpov

I groan when I get a text from Alice saying that her siblings won't let her come over, I chuckle. Normally I would have to worry about parents but in this family, nooo, the siblings are the one's out to get me.

I mean, I have heard of protective siblings but damn, never like the Cullen's. I text her back telling her that its ok, and that I will see her soon. She texts me back that shes going to another family meeting.

I don't answer, I know what its about. I frown and slump on the couch, I shouldn't be doing this to her. I shouldn't make Alice this unhappy… maybe if I'm out of the picture they won't fight as much…

No, I cant leave Alice. She's the only happy thing I have and I won't lose her. I can't, she's the only thing I have left. If she… if she decides to leave me.. I would fight for her. I know what I want and I know what I need and that's Alice.

I don't care if her siblings don't accept me, but I know it matters to Alice. I sigh and flip through show's waiting for Alice to call me telling me what happened. Around half an hour latter my phone rings, I don't check the caller ID. "What's up babe?" I ask in the phone. "Um, it's not Alice." The voice says.

I sigh. "What do you want Rosalie, if its another threat I'll just hang up now, nothing you'll say will make me leave Alice." I say in tiredly to the phone. "Um, no. It's nothing like that. It's about Alice." She says.

I shoot up from my seat. "What? What's wrong with her? Is she ok?" I ask. Rose is quiet. "Rose! What's wrong with her?" I ask. "She's upset, she won't open the door and won't talk to any of us. I was just wondering if… if you would-" I cut her off. "I'm on my way." I say before hanging up the phone and turning my tv off and locking the house. I get in my Mercedes and speed off.

I get to her house in exactly 5 minutes and park out front. I climb out and walk quickly through the light drizzle of rain and when I reach the door I ring the door bell twice. Only to have it open quickly and I see Rosalie looking… not angry. "Is she ok?" I ask stepping in to the house when Rose moves back a step.

"We think so, she just won't talk to us. She's just there crying." She says. I turn. "Crying? Why is she crying?" I ask glaring at her. Rosalie lowers her eyes and her shoulders slump. "It's not the first time is it." I accuse her. Rose shakes her head and I shake my head at her. "I thought family was supposed to be about love and what not, looks like with your type of love I'm not missing much." I say looking around the big house, it looks… amazing.

But, my girl needs me. "Where is Alice?" I ask Rose. "She's up stairs second door to the left." She says. I nod and take a step tours the stairs and stop. "This conversation isn't over." I say looking her in the eyes before taking the stairs two at a time to get to my Alice sooner.

I don't need to count the doors seeing as Emmett, Jazz, Edward, Carlisle and a woman I don't know are standing in front of it. I don't look at her siblings as I walk down the hall to the door. "Dr. Cullen. Nice to see you again." I say extending a hand. He looks up from the door and gives me a smile. "Please, call me Carlisle, Bella. And its nice to see you again." He says shaking my hand. "This is my wife Esme." He says motioning for her.

I look at the woman and find soft brown eyes, guess I know were Emmett got he dimples from. "Nice to meet you Mrs. Cullen." I say. "Call me Esme dear, and it's a pleasure to finally meet you." She says. I give her a small smile and look to the door they were looking at.

"Has she come out?" I ask. They frown and shake there head's I sigh and don't even bother looking at her siblings as I walk to the door and knock lowly. "Go away." Her voice cracks and I frown. "I cant, I just got here." I say to her.

I hear foot steps that stop on the other side of the door, "Bella?" she asks. I chuckle against the door. "No, Santa's helper, What do you want for Christmas?" I ask smiling. I hear her soft smile and the door opens a crack. "What are you doing here?" She asks.

I frown when I see her face, her eyes are red and tear marked. I cup one cheek and wipe away the tear falling. "Rose called me, she sounded worried." I say. Alice's forehead scrunches up and she tries to hold in the small hiccups, her lip trembles and I open the door wider and hug her to me.

"Shhh… don't cry, Alice. Anything but that, please? Don't cry." I say hugging her and kissing the top of her head. She hugs me to her and hide's her head in my chest, its not sexual at all. Right now, my girl fucking needs me.

"Do you want me to tell you something funny that happened to me when I was little?" I ask her. I hear her sniffle and nod and I chuckle at how cute she is. "Alright, well. My mom and dad were still alive and we lived in Phoenix at the time and my dad wanted to show me how to camp." I say chuckling.

"So, we went to a small town seeing as Phoenix is so hot. Anyway, there was this huge river, right and my mom and I went for a swim. When I felt something ticking my leg, well. Me being around six or seven freaked out and though it was a river monster that wanted to eat me." I chuckle.

I hear Alice chuckle against my chest and I brush her hair back with my hand and continue with the stupid story. "Anyway, I freaked out and swam out of the river and clung to my mom. When we got back to the camp site I held onto Charlie the whole night, not wanting the river monster to eat me. It was around midnight and I couldn't sleep when I hear a snap of a twig." I say reliving the old memory.

"I grabbed my dads flashlight and when outside, being a big girl. So, I was scared shitless, my dad was asleep next to my mom and I left the tent. I take one step outside and I feel something crawl on my back. I screamed and ran to the river and jumped in. When my dad and mom came out and saw me in the river they asked me what I was thinking. And I told them 'I rather take my chances with the river monster then to get eaten by a bug.' I said like it was the most obvious think in the world. I will never forget the face that my parents made, I actually think they questioned my seven year old sanity." I say laughing.

I hear Alice laugh and a few softer laughs behind me, when I turn my head around I remember that we weren't alone. I feel uneasy that they know something about my past but happy that Alice is feeling better. "You feeling better, beautiful?" I ask cupping her cheek and looking in her eyes.

She gives me a smile and nods, I give her a kiss in the forehead and she sighs. "Why don't we all go downstairs for a while, we will be right down." Alice says to her family. The nod and leave us alone, I look at Alice. "You sure your ok?" I ask. She nods and gives me a bright smile.

"Yes, I'm good. Just let me clean up, oh, this is my room by the way." She says flicking on the light. She walks in and I stay at the door, its purple. The three walls are a soft shade of purple and there's a huge glass wall on the far end of the huge room. She has a bed, couch, dresser, tv and a desk. I nod and smile. "It's cool." I say steping in and sit on the tidy dark purple bed.

Alice walks into a small door connected with her bedroom that I assume is her bathroom. I hear a fosset turn on and I'm assuming she's washing her face. I look around the room and notice the fashion posters on her wall and I get up to look at the side were her desk is. There are more sketches of dresses.

Wow, they are really good. She has some serious talent, I look at a different sketch at the corner. It's a girl with dark brown hair in a purple plaid shirt opened with a v neck under it and black skinny jeans and black boots… wait, isn't that me?

I look behind me when I hear a foot step and see Alice looking at me. "Is… is that me?" I ask pointing to the corner. She looks at it for a moment and nods. "Yup." She says. I frown. "Why did you draw me?" I ask. She shrugs. "You look hot when you wear that, especial when you hold you leather jacket in your hand like in the sketch." She says.

I look back at it and see that in the hand of the drawing is a leather jacket and is held the same way I hold mine. I smile and look back at her. "Your really good." I say. She shrugs. "It's just a hobie." She says. I frown. "You should plan on making a career in design, I can help you out if you want. I know a few people in Paris that could help you out." I say.

She shrugs. "I'll think about it." She says but I know she likes the idea. I nod and give her a smile. "Alright then." I say and giver her a smile. She smiles back and I take a slow step towards her and hold her waist and pull her to me. "So… I look hot when I wear that?" I ask tilting my head close to hers.

She smirks. "Very, very hot. Maybe even sexy." She says smiling at me. I smirk at her. "Speaking of sexy, when you wear those short skirts..." I say shaking my head. "You will be the death of me one of these days." I say to her. I lick my lips and look in her eyes.

I lean forward and stop right in front of her, I look in her eyes, then her lips, I lick my lips, look in her eyes, bite my lip and lean forword and touch my lips to hers. I grin against her lips when she attacks my lips, I still have that trick perfected.

I pull her to me and kiss her slowly, she tries to make the kiss go faster but I'm not having any of that. I hold her to me tightly and kiss her softly, I let my tongue lick her lower lip ever so slowly until she opens her mouth to me and we fight for dominance, I win and we go at my slow pace until I pull away from her sweet lips.

I smirk down at her and she that she is panting a bit, I kiss her cheek, forehead, nose, lips before I duck down and kiss her neck and slide her collar down a bit to kiss the hickey I left her.

I pull away and she glares at me. "You hypnotized me." She acuses, I laugh. "No I didn't, I just played your weakness." I say. She lifts an eyebrow. "Which is?" She asks. I smirk down at her, "This." I say and I kiss her gruffly this time. She tries not to kiss me back but fails. I bite her lower lip as I pull back and let it go and smile down at her.

"Shit." She says laughing, biting her own lip. I try to ignore the major turn on it is to see her bite her lip and just look at her eyes. I fail and my eyes zoom down to her lips were she is still biting them, she smirks at me. "Guess im not the only one who has a weakness." Alice says.

I flash her a grin. "That's were your wrong, my one and only weakness is…" I trail off chuckling. "What?" She asks. I look in her beautiful hazel eyes. "You really want to know?" I ask grinning. She nods and I pull her to me until my mouth is at her ear. "My only weakness is how horny you make me." I say lowly to her before kissing her under the ear and pulling away.

Alice's eyes snap open and she gasps at me and I smirk. "Fuck." She says and closes her eyes. I chuckle and she tries to make her breathing come back to normally. "Bella, you can't just lay this type of information on me and just pull away." She says looking at me seriously.

I smirk. "Well, I'm sorry. But I'm the one who has a problem with control." I say. She smirks. "All the more reason to get you riled up." She says in a low voice that has me wound up faster then you can flip a switch. She looks at her door and walks quickly over to it and closes the door and locks it.

My breathing becomes heavy as she grabs my hand and sitis me down on the bed. "Alice, your parents are just down stairs." I say to her. She smirks. "All the more reason you have to stay quiet." She says before straddling my waist and kissing my lips. My hands automatically go to her hip and thy as she pushes me into laying down.

My hand starts sliding up and down on her thigh until its over her butt. I leave it there just hovering until I feel Alice's hand cup mine and squeeze. I moan into her mouth and she moans into mine. She continues to kiss me in to oblivion and this time I squeeze her butt in my hands without her having to tell me. She grinds against me and I moan softly in to her mouth.

She breaks the kiss and starts to kiss my neck. "It's ok to touch me, Bella." She says in to my neck. I bite my lip to hold in the whimper I want to let out. I want to touch her, I want to feel her soft skin but its not the time or the place to do it. I sigh and flip us over when we are flipped over I pull away and stand.

"What's wrong?" She asks. I sigh. "Nothing, just. Its not the time or place to do this Alice." I say. She frowns. "You… you don't want me." She says quietly. My jaw slacks is she fucking for real? "I…I mean, I know I don't have the biggest boobs or the best butt-" I cut her off with a kiss.

I kiss her deeply and pull away. "You can't honestly believe that any of that matters to me, Alice. If only you knew how much it kills me to pull away form you every fucking time, how much I want to touch you and feel you in my hands. But, I am just worried your not ready for this. Your perfect, everything about your body is perfect and you have no idea how seriously fucking turned on and horny I am right now." I say to her.

She laughs. "Your turned on and horny?" She asks incredulously. I chuckle. "I would show you but that wouldn't really help myself control… or yours. What I'm trying to say is, I want you, I fucking need you so bad. But, I want to take it slow with you. Never doubt how much I want you, I don't think I have ever wanted someone so badly as I do now." I say giving her a searing kiss on the lips.

I pull away from her with a sigh. "We should probably go down stairs." I say to her. She sighs. "For someone with, 'bad self control' you seem awfully controlled around me." She mumbles. I chuckle. "Because I have to concentrate every fiber of my being… we wouldn't want a repeat of biology." I say.

She thinks for a moment. "Truthfully, I wouldn't mind." She says and I groan and hide my head in her shoulder, I bite her neck softly. "Don't tempt me, Alice. Don't fucking tempt me." I say to her neck while I bite against it softly before pulling away.

She chuckles, "Alright, fine. Let's go downstairs." She says. I nod and she entwines our fingers and we walk downstairs. We walk and sit on the steps and start talking softly to each other when Esme passes by and smiles at us.

"Bella, why don't you stay for dinner?" She asks. I shift nervously. "It's all right, I would not to want to impose." I say looking at the ground. Mothers never make me nervous… so why does Alice's mom? Shit. "Nonsense, if that were the case I wouldn't have asked. What do you say dear, will you stay for dinner?" She asks again. I nod once "Sure, yeah. I would love to, thank you." I say.

She smiles at me and walks back to the kitchen and I hear Alice laugh. "What is wrong with you?" she asks. I frown. "Nothing." I say. She raises an eyebrow at me and I grimace. "Fine, your mom makes me nervous." I say quietly. She laughs at me softly. "Oh, babe. Don't worry, she wont hur't a fly." She says.

I nod. "Exactly, you said nothing about hurting a human." I say and she laughs at me and I smile at her laugh. Then Alice smirks. "We going to be sitting next to each other?" She says. I shrug. "I guess." I say and she smirks even more and kisses me chastely on the lips. "Remember to stay quiet." She says and stands and walks away to the kitchen. I gap at her… she wouldn't… fuck, she would.

"Alice." I say walking over to the kitchen. I stop when I see everyone standing there and I look to the side to see Alice smiling up at me, "Um… can I just… Um, speak to Alice for a sec?" I ask .

Carlisle chuckles but nods. "Thank you." I say before placing a hand on her back and guiding her out of the kitchen and glaring down at her. "Don't do anything stupid, more then half of them don't like me, if I ruin my chance with your parents its not going to be easy." I say to her.

She chuckles. "Fine, fine, I won't do anything." She says grinning. I pout. "This didn't change your mind at all, did it?" I say sadly. She shakes her head and I sigh. "Fine, just don't make me moan." I say seriously to her. She shrugs. "I'm not even sure what does make you moan yet." She says.

I groan. "This is going to be torture." I mumble as she grabs my hand and leads me to the kitchen once again. "Alright, who's ready cause I'm starved?" Alice asks standing next to the table and I pull the seat back for her. "Thank you." She says as I push her seat back, I nod. "Anytime." I say before taking a seat quietly.

I take a bite of the food just like everyone else and nod, it taste amazing. "Wow, this taste amazing Esme." I say. She smiles brightly. "Thank you dear." She says. I nod and take another bite before I feel it.

Carlisle decides to speak up. "So, Bella. Tell us about yourself." He says. I gulp "Oh, um. Well, My parents passed away, I'm owner of a venue in Italy and a huge beer company, and.. I have no family." I say with a shrug.

Everyone at the table gasps at me, except for Alice who already knows the story. I look at them then at Alice. "Did I say something wrong?" I ask her. She sigh's but shakes her head. "You just released a lot of information on them." She says quietly.

I nod and look at the table again. "Its alright, no need to act weird. I'm used to it." I say with a shrug. No one speaks and I look back at Alice who is eating calmly. "Alice, I think I killed your family." I say quietly. She snorts and that seems to wake up everyone because the all stare at her.

"What? She said something funny." She defends. Esme speaks first. "Oh, dear. I am so sorry to hear that. Do you really live all alone?" She asks. I take a bite of the lasagna she made and nod. "Yup. My mom died when I was 10 and my dad passed away last year." I say with a shrug. "Oh, heavens." Esme says. I shrug again. "It's not that big of a deal, I'm used to being alone." I say taking a sip of my soda.

Carlisle frowns and looks at me. "But, your seventeen. Where is your guardian?" he asks. I chuckle. "My guardian for appearance is in Italy, where he permanently resides. I live here, in my old house." I say. Carlisle frowns deeper. "Isn't that illegal?" He asks. I shrug. "So is bribing but the people I dealt with seemed ok with it." I say shrugging.

Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper and Edward gap at me. Carlisle looks deep in though, Alice looks… shocked I admitted it and Esme looks sad. I sigh and try to explain myself as best I can without sounding like a crazy rich girl.

"I… I didn't want to leave the town were my parents fell in love and where they are buried. I didn't want to move, yet again. And let alone because, people who have never meet me thought it was best. So, I did what I needed to be happy. I bribed the people to leave me alone, Jenks, a life long family friend is my guardian and business manager. And I live here, I maintain myself better then any adult can. So, they leave me be." I say.

Alice gives me a small hug and I smile at her softly and look back to her family. Esme is staring at me… weird. Warmly almost. Carlisle looks worried and the siblings are just staring at me sadly. I sigh. "I don't need your pity." I say to them. Alice holds my hand. "They don't pity you." She says softly.

I sigh, "Good, because I don't need it and I don't want it. My life is perfect for all intense and purpose. I'm rich and owner of my own successful business, I have my health and now I have Alice. It's pretty much all I need." I say to them. "Honey… don't you ever get lonely?" Esme asks.

I look at her for a moment then at my plate and shrug, when Rosalie snorts. "Her? Lonely. She had a different girl in her bed every night, I doubt she was lonely." Rose says. I clench my fist. "Rosalie!" Esme chants. Alice is quiet beside me and I sigh. "She's right though… I did. And it makes me sick to my stomach every night to know the mistakes I have made. But, it happened and there is no use denying it." I say.

I look at Esme and Carlisle from where I sit. I run a hand through my hair nervous as shit but having to talk to them before her siblings position their minds against me.

"I am not fit to be anywhere near your daughter Mr. and Mrs. Cullen. I don't deserve to be here or anywhere near her. And I would understand full heartedly if you wished for me to leave but, all I ask for is a chance. Once chance to prove to you that I am not like you or your children have me pictured. All I ask is one chance to prove myself to all of you and to Alice that I am not how I was in my past. And… if I blow it…. I would stay away from your family." I say to them.

Alice grab's my hand in hers and looks at me. "You won't blow it." She says quietly to me. I shrug. "Let's keep on hopping that, won't we?" I ask. She chuckles. "So little faith in yourself?" She asks. I smile at her. "I have no faith period." I say to her. She rolls her. "Never pictured you as an atheist." She mutters. And I chuckle and look back at her family.

Esme smiles at me. "You have nothing to prove to me, dear. I can see you care for our Alice, seeing as you drove over here a few minutes ago to see if she was alright." Esme says. I nod and chance a glance at Carlisle. "You've shown that you care for our Alice, what other reason do I need to judge you? I don't want to judge you at all, Bella. You are welcome here anytime." He says smiling at me.

I sigh in relief, they like me! Fucking score! I look at the siblings and my stomach drops. "Rose, Jazz, Em, Edward?" Alice asks. Edward sighs and shrugs. "We're still undecided." He says. I frown but nod and shrug. "I still stand on what I said. It would be better if you accepted us for Alice's sake at least. But its still her and mine relationship. You have no say in it." I say to the siblings.

Alice sighs. "Babe, just drop it. They don't care about us at all. They just want to see me miserable." She says. I frown and look back at her siblings. "You four can I talk with you for a bit?" I ask.

Then I look back at Carlisle and Esme. "If we can be excused that is." I say. They nod and I stand Alice frowns at me and I smile and kiss the top of her head. "I'll just be a sec." I say and us five walk out to the living room.

I stare at them. "I have never done a single thing to any of you and neither has Alice. I know you guys don't like me, but for Alice's sake at least accept it! I don't care if you don't like me, I will never care if you guys like me. But I do care for Alice. Can't you guys see how hurt she is that you all refuse to accept that she is happy?" I aks them.

Emmett frowns. "We don't want to hurt Alice, we're just worried your going to hurt her." He says. I sigh. "If I were going to hurt her don't you think I would have given up already? I would never stand for this bull crap coming from you guys if it weren't the case!" I say to them.

Jazz nods. "Your right, and it's nothing against you personally Bella. Its just that… Tanya, Irina and Kate talked to us last week and well. It wasn't pretty." He says. I stare at them in shock. "The Denali girls talked to you guys?" I ask.

The nod and I laugh, I laugh full heartedly, I laugh so hard Alice walks in and steps at us followed by her parents. "What going on?" Alice asks. And I chuckle and try to hold in my laughter. "The…. Denali girls hahahahah talked to them… hahahahah." I say chuckling.

Alice stares at me and chuckles. "Why is that so funny Bella?" She asks. I straighten up and chuckle. "Well, seeing as they were the one's who bullied you and I was the one that defended you. Its just ironic that they would believe them." I say.

The siblings stare at us in confusion. "Alice… you never told your siblings who it was that was bullying you?" I ask. She shakes her head. "You were being bullied after that one time?" Rose asks. I nod. "She as bullied constantly, why do you think I was always around?" I ask rhetorically.

Rose frowns. "Even when… the misunderstanding happened?." She saks. I nod. "Especially then." I say. The siblings now look sheepish. "They had told us that… Bella was the one bullying you." Edward says.

Alice gaps at them. "Bella? She was protecting me you idiots!" She says. "Alice." Esme says and she shakes her head. "I'm sorry, mom. But it's redicolous! Bella threatened them the first week to stay away from me, in what state of mind would you all believe that she was the one bullying me?" She ask them.

They shrug and mumble incoherently. Alice shakes her head and laughs softly. "Well, now we know why they hate you." She says to me. I chuckle. "Yeah, and that also explains why Irina, Kate and Tanya have left us alone. Now, I think I need to talk to them." I say.

Alice frowns at me. "No, your not getting in anymore fights with them." She says to me. I sigh. "Alice, they bullied you, lied to your siblings, caused unnecessary drama all to just break us up. Honey, I'm going over there." I say. She grins. "Fine, so am I." She says.

I frown and smile at her. "No, your not. You're staying here and eating a nice dinner with your family." I say cupping her cheek and giving her a kiss on the forehead. "No, if your leaving I am too." She says. I sigh. "Must you make everything complicated?" I ask her. She grins. "No, I just like to have you near me." She says.

I sigh. "Fine, I'll stay. I will not look for trouble with the Denali's and your siblings will not bother us anymore. I guess today worked out for the best." I say shrugging. Alice grins. "I guess it did." She says. Just then I look to the side were her family is smiling at us two.

"Um… what's so funny?" I ask. Esme smiles. "You two are adorable." She says and I chuckle. "What is it with you Cullen women and saying I'm adorable?" I ask Alice lowly. She giggles. "It's all you babe." She says. I laugh and Carlisle smiles .

"Alright, enough drama for one night. It's time to relax and finish our nice dinner before it gets cold." He says. We all nod and we follow through.

After that, the whole night passed smoothly. I didn't leave until eleven and that's only because I was sleepy as hell and left. Carlisle and Esme keeps asking me about my business and about school (I could tell they wanted to ask about my family) wile Emmett wanted to play video games.

So, that's what we did. Finally… finally I think we can stand a chance. For now drama is a no go and all I have to worry about is making my girl happy. Now... to win over her family and let Alice know the true me... but first. I need to get that date set.

_**A/N: Awwww, happy Bella! Such a strange thing but ha! Happy for once, now its just smooth sailing… or is it? Will the Denali girls ever give up on their Bella? Will Alice tempt Bella to do something stupid? Will there be a party to ruin everything?**_

_**I have no idea cuz I haven't written anything yet. xD Next chapter is the first date!**_

_**Review!**_


	19. Chapter 19

_**A/N: So, people… I guess you like the last chapter? Lol, the-poetry-of-ink , loved a review that asked me to marry you. I feel awesome! And yup, I'll marry you as long as you make me your favorite in fanfiction! Is it a deal?**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!... what? I don't have anything to add to it…**_

_**Ch.19**_

_**Bpov.**_

Sunday, today is Sunday. I wake up slowly and grin when I remember last night at Alice's house. I groan and roll over so that my head is buried in my pillow…

_Alice close's the front door quietly behind her as I pull her to me and kiss her deeply. She knots her hand in my hair and pulls on it and bites my lower lip. I groan, so good. Alice pulls away from me and hides her head in my neck and I hug her as I cuddle my face in her short soft hair._

_"Thanks for showing up." Alice says quietly. I sigh and hug her close to me. "I'll always show up when you need me, Alice. I work hard to keep the things important to me safe." I say resting my chin on the top of her head and looking out in the woods around her house._

_"I'm important to you?" She asks. I roll my eyes. "Very, have I not tried so hard to show it?" I ask. She shrugs. "Wouldn't know." She says and I chuckle. "Alice…if you were not important to me, I wouldn't be here. I'm a very private person but, that doesn't mean I don't care about you. If I didn't care I would have just stopped trying once your siblings started getting in the way." I say quietly._

_She nods and I smile and lean back to kiss her forehead, "I need to go, it's late." I say to her. She nods and lifts up on her tip toes and kisses me, I smile against the kiss but move my lips against hers slowly, showing her patience and care._

_Once she is happy with the kiss she pulls back and with a sigh I walk down the steps. "Good night beautiful." I say as I slip in my Mercedes and drive off with a waving Alice fading in my rear view._

…I sigh and get out of bed, sleep not coming easily to me anymore. I take a warm shower and get dressed for the day in a regular T-shirt, lose jeans, sneakers and I do my hair its usually curly. I walk downstairs and search my house for food, its empty. I frown and keep on searching. "Come on! There has to be something in here." I murmur to my self.

After five minutes of searching I give up and check my phone, I shrug and call Alice. Its around 8:30 so maybe she's up, "Hello?" a happy voice asks. I raise an eyebrow "Good morning, beautiful." I say sitting on the couch and turning on my TV to CNN and lower the volume. "Morning, Bella." She says happily. I chuckle. "Well someone is an early riser." I say amused. I hear her wind chime laugh. "Same goes for you." she challenges.

I chuckle. "What can I say, you get used to it. So… anyway, I was wondering if you were busy and if not if you wanted to hang out?" I ask, my stomach growling. I can practically hear the grin on her voice. "Miss me so soon?" She teases. I roll my eyes and lift my feet to the coffee table. "Incredibly so, I think I will die." I joke.

She snorts. "Sure 'ya will, so what's on your mind, Bella?" She asked. "Well, I was wondering if you wanted to grab breakfast with me?" I ask. "There's this really awesome diner on the corner way off the freeway that has amazing food, so… you up for it?" I ask.

She chuckles. "Sure, just give me a few to get dressed out of my PJ's and I'll call you back." She says. I nod. "Awesome, take your time. No rush." I say. I can hear the smile in her voice. "Bye, Bella." She says and it clicks as the call ends.

I sigh and sit on my couch and get bored quickly. Shutting off my TV I walk up the stairs and the piano grabs my attention. "Hmm.. haven't played in a wile." I mumble quietly as I walk over to it and sit on the piano bench.

I lift the wooden flap that hides the key's and place my hand on the ivory. I sigh, I had missed playing a bit but after Charlie died… I couldn't seem to stand playing. I sigh and press a few random notes when a flash of pain runs through my body. I stop and close the wooden holder hiding the keys as I try to think out the pain.

It's mental, I know but every single time I try to play the piano all I can think about is mom and dad. Just then an image takes over my head.

_~flash back~_

_Its Saturday morning and I just woke up to the sound of a song being played on the piano. I run down the stairs as best I can in my clumsy seven year old body and slide down the hall and stop when I reach the door and peek through._

_Mom and dad are sitting on the piano bench, smiling at each other . "L is for the way you look at me. O is for the only one I see." My fathers deep voice sings. "V is very very extra ordinary. E is even more then anyone that you adore." Mom's soft voice rings through the house. Then together they sing. "And love, is all that I can give to you, and love is more then just a game for two. Two in love can make it, take my heart and please don't break it. Love was made for me and you…" Their perfect atune voices sing together._

_I giggle and there eyes break apart from each others and they look to the door were I'm hiding. "Look's like we have a fan, Charlie." Mom's soft voice says. I hear his soft chuckle. "Come out here squirt." Dad says. Giggling I make my way to them and hug them both._

_"You two sing so pretty." I say when dad sits me up on his lap. Mom smiles and so does dad. "Did you know I met Charlie while singing?" She says. I grin. "Mom, I know the story." I groan. She chuckles. "Very well our little monster, go get ready for breakfast. Daddy's making pancakes." She says._

_I slide of dad's lap and smile up at him. "You are?" I ask. He chuckles. "I guess I am now." He sighs and stands. I give him a big hug and run up the stairs still giggling from when they kissed._

_~End flashback~_

I place my head in my hands and try to will the tears that spilled stop. I run a hand through my hair and bite my lip. "Stupid memory's." I growl out as I storm up the stairs to my room and go clean my face. I look in the mirror after I wash my face and glare at myself. "It's all your fault you know." I growl to myself. "If I hadn't begged mom to take me out that night… she'd be alive. She would be fucking alive and you wouldn't be alone." I growl out.

Just then Alice text's me that she's ready to go out, I sigh and look down at myself. "Shit, I look like crap." I say and I quickly peel off my shirt and go to change, I grab a wife beater and a button up and throw it on. I look at my jeans and there good and so are my shoes.

I grab my leather jacket and put it on and grab some black gloves with the fingers cut out. I sigh and walk down the steps quickly and walk out the door after I grab my key's. I lock up and hop in the car, I close the garage with the button and drive quickly down the road and on to the driveway of the Cullen's.

I sigh, once I reach it and pull out my compact and check my make up quickly. I don't need much of it, just a hint of cover up and lip gloss and I'm good to go. I re-do the cover up on my face while I wait for Alice to walk down the porch and get in the car. Normaly I would get out and open it for her but I think looking good for her is a bit more important then her opening a door.

She opens the door and slides in and closes the door. "Hey, babe." I say placing lip gloss on my lower lip. I look over at her and see her looking at me with a frown. "What?" I ask closing the compact and placing the lip gloss in my pocket. "Nothing, I just… never imagined you as a make up kinda girl." She says. I laugh. "Trust me I'm not. I just have a few bags under my eyes and if I don't wear something, I look like road kill." I say smiling. Or like I was crying. I add silently.

She nods and leans forward to place a small peck on my lips and pulls back. "Hmm, strawberries." She says licking her lips. I smirk at her and pull the car back before driving down the driveway and on to the road.

"I must say, you look hot as always Alice." I say sneaking a glance at her from the side of my eye. I hear her soft laugh. "Thank you, so do you darling." She says and I grin. "That my new nick pet name?" I ask. She giggles. "No, I have to think of a really good one to give you. Something that will beat 'beautiful'" she says.

I chuckle and lean back in my seat as I drive with my good hand, the other my right hand on the gear shift. "Hmm… you can always go with 'Sex God', 'Sexy', 'Amazing', 'Badass' or the straight girls favorite 'Bitch' I kind of like all of them." I say flashing her a grin. She sighs. "How can you possibly like 'bitch?" She asks incredulously.

I shrug. "Beautiful Individual That Cunt's Hate' it has a nice ring to it." I say grinning. I hear Alice laugh softly. "Yep, your crazy." She mumbles. I sigh and flip my hand so that Alice can entertwine our fingers.

"I'm not crazy, I just chose to ignore the minor things like what someone thinks of me." I say with a shrug. I stop at the red light in town and turn to look at her. "Trust me, when your life turns out like mine. You learn to not care what people think." I say. Alice surprises me by giving me a quick hug and I kiss the top of her head as I pull forward slowly and take a turn that will lead to the highway.

I sigh and Alice speaks. "You know, you keep shocking me. You always say that our a private person but you seem so open to me." She says softly. I smile softly at her and shrug. "I'm still shocked how everything comes so naturally with you." I mumble.

The car ride starts to go silent as I pull to the highway and I move my hand from the gear shift and lean so that my arm is around Alice. I sigh and frown. "There's some CD's in the glove compartment, or my ipod is right there. Pick what you like." I say to her.

Alice reaches for the Ipod and starts messing around with it while I drive calmly down the road. I see from the corner of my eye as she hooks up the Ipod and switches on the radio. Then the soft kinda electro pop beat starts to play. I can help the soft laugh that slips my lips.

"Tatu super fan?" I ask her. She laughs and sits straight and nods. "Don't you remember that I copied Volkova's look. Duuuuh, I'm a super fan. And by your play list so are you." she says. I chuckle and shrug. "I'm addicted. I also think Volkova was super sexy." I say with a grin.

"Humph." Alice grumps and I chuckle. "But… I have this huge thing for a girl in school, she has supper protective siblings and awesome parents. And she has this crazy way of being so cute when she's mad… or jealous." I add grinning when she smiles.

"I wasn't jealous." She says. I grin and nod. "Good, you're the only person that has my attention. I find it useless that you should feel jealous." I say nodding my head to the beat of 'All the things she said.' Then I grin and start singing.

"I'm in serious shit, I feel totally lost. If I'm asking for help, its only because. Being with you has opened my eyes, who could ever believe what a perfect surprise." I sing. Alice grins and starts to sing. "I keep asking myself, wondering how. I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out." She trails off when we chuckle and I lower the volume.

"We're here." I say pulling in to the road and to the small diner. I park my car and get out and walk over to Alice's side and open the door. She smiles and steps out and stands next to me as I close the door and start walking with her by my side to the diner. Once we enter I regret it, now I remember why I haven't eaten here so often.

"Bella." Sheila says smiling. I give her a slight smile and nod. "Sheila, how are you?" I ask. She smiles 'flirtingly' at me and places a hand on my arm. "Oh, I've been better." She says. I give her a grimace kind of smile and step back. "Right.. um, Sheila. This is Alice, my girlfriend." I say.

Alice smiles and nods not offering her hand. I hide my smirk and look back at Sheila who is staring at me with a raised eyebrow. "Your kidding right, you don't date Bella." She says. I shrug. "I am now." I say. She looks Alice up and down and grins wider, I frown and look at Alice then at her.

The fuck is Sheila planning? Alice is hotter then her. "Well, when you finish 'dating' her give me a call." She says giving me a wink before walking to give us a booth. I chuckle and half growl at the freaking un-needed air quotes. I put an arm around Alice's waist and pull her close to me while I walk. "That's not about to happen anytime soon, Sheila." I say to her giving a kiss at the top of Alice's head.

She turns and looks at the booth were we are to be seated and motions for it. She smiles at me when she sees us and steps a bit closer to me when I motion for Alice to sit down first. "Bella, we all know that after you get that fill out of your little girl. You're going to want a woman." She says before walking off.

I grimace and run a hand through my hair. "Well, that was fun." I say sarcastically sitting down across from Alice. She's frowning at the table. "Yeah, sure." She says softly and looks to the side to the window that looks over the road. I frown and capture her hand in mine and make her look at me. "Alice.." I say and she shifts her gaze from the window to me.

"Ignore what Sheila said, it doesn't mean anything. I… um, we can leave if you want." I say softly to her. She shakes her head. "No, I just… need to get used to your ex's showing around." She says softl. I snort. "She's not my ex." I say to her. Alice frowns. "Then why was she flirting with you?" She asks angrily.

I shrug. "Im not sure, I mean… um, I slept with her once at a party. It wasn't that good really. I don't even know why she thinks she has a chance… especially against you." I say giving Alice a small smile. Alice rolls her eyes. "Sure, Ms. Big boobs, tall, curvy and old is no match for plain old Alice." She says rolling her eyes.

I frown. "One, you are way hotter then her so get that out of your mind, second you have better curves, third you are the one I'm interested in and fourth of all… she's not my type." I say to her. Alice looks in my eyes and I cup her face in my hand. "I kinda like the jealous Alice, she's fun. But… insecure Alice I don't need to see ever agin." I say giving her a wink.

She pouts her puppy dog eyes on full blast and I can't help it, I need to kiss that pout! I sit up a bit and lean into kiss her. I cup her neck and lean forward and capture her lips in mine. I kiss her deeply until a throat clears and I break the kiss and groan.

It's not a damn Cullen but it's worse, it's Sheila. She grins and places two menu's in front of us. "Order love birds, I'll be back to pick up your order." She says. I nod and sit back only to start to feel Alice's leg rub against mine.

I snicker. "I never though of you as the footsy type." I mumble. She grins. "Theres a lot of things you don't know about me." She says and I grin and motion for the menu. I already know it by heart. "What are you going to order?" She asks. I smile. "Chocolate chip waffles and a soda." I say. She nods. "Hmm… I think I'll have the strawberry waffles and soda." She says. I nod and lift my hand for Sheila to come over.

My eyes are locked with Alice and her leg rubs against mine again. "Yes?" Sheila asks. My eyes still locked with Alice's answer. "Chocolate chip house waffles and Strawberry house waffles with two cokes." I say. "O-k. Ill bring that right up." She says. I don't even look at her as she leaves and just smile at Alice.

"Did I ever tell you how pretty you look?" I ask. She shrugs. "I can't remember." She says. I grin. "Well, beautiful. You look breath taking." I say. She grins this goffy happy grin that looks so good there. "As do you." she says smiling brightly.

I roll my eyes at her compliment and grin. "So, my little pixie. What do you want to do today?" I ask once Sheila places the food on our table and leaves quickly. I grin and with a nod to Alice I start eating. "So, ideas for our date today?" I ask. She swallows and gives me a raised eyebrow. "Our date is today?" She asks. I grin "This is actually faze one." I say.

She smiles at me. "Well, anything at all really. As long as I get to hang out with you, doesn't really matter what we do." She says before placing a peice of waffle in her mouth. I smile and nod a few times. "I was hoping you would say something like that." I say and after that we eat in silence.

Only speaking to ask each other questions about the food or to offer each other bites of different things in our plate. Alice offers me a peice of her strawberry waffle and I lean forward to accept it when she places it before her lips. I grin and sit up and lean forward a bit more and grab the peice from between her lips, I lick her lips from the sweet syrup and grin as I sit back and chew, "Mmm, yummy." I say wiping my mouth with a napkin.

Alice chuckles and I smile. "Remind me to bring you out for breakfast more often, I swear the food taste better with you around." I say sipping my soda. Alice laughs. "Sure thing." She says also sipping her soda.

I look at our finish plates and grin, "You ready for faze two or do you want something else?" I ask. Alice's eyes go wide. "Oh, heaven's no. I think my max is at 4 waffles." She says patting her stomach. I chuckle and nod in agreement. I grab my wallet from my back pocket. I take out a twenty and a ten as a tip and slide out of the booth. "Come on, beautiful. We need to diegest and then we can go out on our date." I say smiling.

She lifts an eyebrow and I chuckle as I walk out of the diner only to hear my name being called. I groan and give my key's to Alice, "Pasenger seat, Alice. I know where I'm taking you. I'll be right back, just let me check what she wants." I say and turn to walk back in the diner.

"Yeah?" I ask Sheila. She smiles softly at me. "You've changed, Bella. Now, wait! Don't look at me like that and let me finish. I was saying that you have changed a lot since last time I saw you and… I'm happy for you. You look happy for once, not just your arrogant self. And, I'm happy for you." She says smiling.

I give her a soft smile. "Thanks, I'm not the same. That… that pixie over there changed me. And hell, we haven't even dated for that long… I just know that I'm crazy about her." I say with a grin. Sheila rolls her eyes and laughs and looks at the car. "You don't have to tell me twice, I could see it all over your face when you were smiling like a girl who won a million bucks." Sheila says.

I laugh. "I think I won more… I just need to make sure I keep it safe." I say with a grin. Sheila smiles and pats my shoulder. "Go to that girl, hope she knows she's a lucky one." She says. I nod and take a few steps away before turning. "I think I'm the lucky one." I say with a grin as I walk and go to the car and laugh when I see Alice in the driver side.

I sigh and turn to go to the passenger side and I hear Sheila laugh. "Shit! She really is lucky! You would have beaten someone with a stick for driving your car." She says and I laugh. "Something like that." I say to her and open the passenger side door and get in.

I turn in my seat. "Go to my house, we can hang out there before the next part is ready." I say. She nods and pulls the car out of the parking space and launches it forward. "Man, I love my porche but this car is good." She says. I laugh. "Why am I not surprised you have a fast car?" I ask. She shrugs. "Cause, I'm awesome." She says.

I smile and nod. "Yeah… you are awesome." I say looking out the windshield. Now, faze two of the best date ever.

_**A/N: here it is faze one of date number one! Review and ill publish faze two!**_


	20. Chapter 20

_**A/N: So, how you all liking the story? Ive gotten some awesome reviews that I love! Anyway here is preparation for faze two of an amazing date. Love it!**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT… I do love music.**_

_**Ch.20**_

_**Bpov**_

I laugh and kiss the top of Alice's hand as I lead her out of the car to my house. "You sure your parents don't mind you spending all day with me?" I ask her again. She rolls her eyes and twirles up the stairs and to my porch.

She nods. "They are more then happy really. Seeing as we didn't really have alone time, Mom and Dad told everyone it was more then fine to have a whole day together." She says as I open my front door and let her step in.

I walk in to the living room with Alice and we both sit down and I hand her the controler, "Pick something to watch." I say lowly to her ear as I lean back in the couch and pull her close to me. "This ok?" I ask her. I had no will to move away but if she wanted I would.

I hear her wind chime giggle and smile. "Yeah, its ok." She says before turning on the TV and picking something to watch. She flips through some channels until she settles on some comedy show. I don't watch the show as much as I watch her face for the reactions.

The way her dimples show when she laughs or how her eyes shine when something is about to happen, how her eyes widen in realization at something on the screen and the way her eyebrows scrunch up when she sees something that confuses her. I start to play with her hair for a while, her spiky silk locks smooth to the touch.

I grin a bit when I see her eyes droop when I run my hand through the short hair, "Tired?" I ask quietly. She pouts and shakes her head but her eyes are still closed. "Comfy." She sighs and with a chuckle I lean my head on her neck and just stay there.

After a few minutes I realize we are snuggling and I want to laugh at my change. I went from being a tight personal space keeper to a person who snuggles. Who would have thought? I sigh and pull her closer to me and with the Tv as a soft backround I cherish the feel of her warm body next to mine.

I sigh content and chuckle when I feel her hug me tightly, her head on my shoulder. I start to lazily run the top of my fingers across her back absentmindedly. While with my other hand I leave on my side not knowing what to do with it. I'm looking at a picture on my wall, a portrait.

I look at the golden frame, and the different shade of color's. I look at the three figures standing there in that portrait, frozen in time, forever non-aging. I sigh as I make out the details of my family.

It was just a common pose, mother sitting on a chair with me on her lap and father standing behind us. Him in his Marines uniform, Mother in her light blue sun dress and me in a soft white dress. With a pang I feel a wave of nostalgia run through me, I can't be in this house right now, I don't want to feel like this.

I sit up a bit and look down at Alice who's eyes opened feeling me move. "How would you feel if I take you somewhere outside?" I ask. She smiles softly and nods. "That would be cool." She says. I kiss her cheek and we get up, I slide out over her and stand and smile down at her.

"I'll be right back, let me just grab a blanket. We're having a picnic." I say with a smile as I walk over to the closet under the stairs. I grab a thick blue quilt and an empty basket and walk to the foyer where Alice is leaning against the door.

I grab my car key's and we walk to the porch were I turn and quickly lock the door and then to the car. I place the blanket and basket on the back seat's and open the door for Alice. She slides in quietly and I close the door for her before walking to my side and getting in and closing the door.

I pull out and drive to the left once we get out of my driveway. Alice looks behind her. "We're not going in town?" She asks. I shake my head. "There's a small shop up ahead and I'll buy what we need there before driving to the trails." I say placing a bit of speed in the car.

The sooner I get away from this town the better. Sure, I'm not 100% positive going to the medow won't hurt. But anything is better then staying in that house and just wallowing in my loss.

I bite my lip and place a bit more preasure in the gas. Anything is better then feeling that hallow feeling inside. That eerie feeling in your mind that something is watching you and having fun seeing you so messed up.

I can't out run the pain, but I can avoid it until I'm alone and without Alice. She dosen't need to see me like that, she deserves better. If she only knew what I was really like, what the true Bella was like. She would run for the hill's, she woudn't look back.

She would leave… just like they all did. Everyone leaves, I just need to make sure Alice dosesn't. I'm in to deep, it's so early and I can tell I am in to deep. It's scary and un-settling, if she doesn't feel the same way I will be shattered but… it will spare her so much heart ache.

I sigh and slow down a bit when I see that I'm heading close to eighty. I look to the side and see Alice looking at me, I offer her a quick smile. "What you looking at pixie?" I ask giving her a smile.

She shakes her head for a moment. "You ok?" she asks. I frown and give her one nod and a smile. "Why wouldn't I be?" I ask. She shrugs I can see from the corner of my eye. "I'm not entirely sure, I just know you keep sighing." She says quietly. I give her a smile that doesn't falter. "Tell you the truth… I'm not even sure why. It's just a bad habit." I say with a shrug of my own.

I'm only half lying. It is a habit, she just doesn't know the memory's that trigger it. She gives me a soft giggle. "If you say so." She says and we fall in to silence. I frown and search my brain for something to bring a smile on her face.

I smirk. "So, how you taking to the news that tweety was a boy?" I ask smirking. She gasps out a laugh. "I still can't process it." she says. I chuckle and pull the hood back, there's sun today. A miracle in some ways and I don't want to miss it. I grin at the warmth that hits my skin. "Mmm… I never thought I would miss the sun." I say with a soft smile.

Alice sighs content. "Didn't you live in Phoenix?" She asks. I nod. "Most of my life." I agree. "Tell me about it?" She asks. I purse my lips and run my free hand through my hair that is wipping in the wind… I need to get a hair cut.

"Well… oh, look the store." I say slowing down more and pulling in out front and quickly getting out of the car and give her a smile. "Pick out what you like, I'll grab a cooler with some soda's." I say to her as I make my way to the back and grab a mini cooler and fill it with ice.

I take it inside of the small hut and look for Alice. She's walking up the isles and I chuckle. I place the bucket on the counter and turn to see a familiar face and I smile softly. "Mrs. Attera. How are you?" I ask. She smiles at me, her soft wrinkly face scrunching up in an adorable manor.

"Bella, is that you?" She asks in astonishment. I duck my head. "Yeah, Mrs. Attera. It's me." I say. She walks around the counter and stands in front of me. She a few inches shorter then me and her arms are wide. "It's been so long my dear." She says in her medolic voice.

I step in to her hug, her soft and delicate hands wraping tightly around me. I hug her back careful not to hurt her. "I'm sorry, its just… hurt to much to go around." I say to her. She hugs me for another moment and pulls back and cups my face in her hands. Her deep brown eyes pouring in to mine. "Such pain a young soul must suffer to know its worth." She sighs and walks back behind the counter.

I grin at her. "What is pain but another stitch to someone who is so used to it?" I ask back. She laughs softly. "Always the smooth talker, Bella." She says. I grin wider "So, how is everyone. Quil, Sue, Maggie?" I ask.

She smiles softly at me. "Maggie is at college, her second year if I am correct. Quil is with his father in Tacoma visiting and Sue is dating that fellow from the reservation. Sall or something like that." She says waving her hand. I chuckle. "You mean Sam?" I ask. She nods. "Oh, yes. That's the name, good boy. A bit moody though." She says.

I laugh softly at her. "Aren't we all." I say giving her a smile when she glares at me. "I am not moddy, I just need people to stop pissing me off." She says and I burst out laughing. Leave it to 65 year old Mrs. Attera to say the word "Piss off."

I wipe at the tears that come out of my eyes from laughing. "Oh, Susannah. You're a riot." I say. She beams at me. "Well, someone has to be active. Huh, that old fart over there won't stop wining about his knees." She mutters and I laugh more.

"But, Susannah, you love Caius." I say chuckling. She smiles at me. "I do, but just because I do doesn't mean he's not an old fart. It just means he's my old fart." She says grinning as I laugh.

I'm craking up with Susannah when Alice walks over to me and smiles at seing me laugh so much. "What's up Bella?" She asks still smiling. I laugh. "Nothing, just Susannah being well, Susannah." I say.

Alice frowns. "Who?" She asks. I control my laughter and clear my throat. "Right, your new. Um, Susannah. This is my girlfriend Alice. Alice this is Susannah Attera. She's practically family." I say.

Alice smiles at Susannah. "Nice to meet you Mrs. Attera." She says politely. Susannah rolls her eyes. "Alice my dear, call me Susannah. 'Mrs.' makes me feel old." She says. I laugh and Alice elbows me in the ribs and Susannah grins at me.

"Bella." Alice says in shock and I laugh louder. "What? She know's she's almost dust." I say giving Susannah a playful wink. She laughs. "I may be dust, but I can take you." She says pointing at me and I lift my hands in surrender.

"I believe you." I say quicky. Susanna grins. "Alice, it's great to meet the only person not affected by this young lady's horid mood." She says to Alice. I gap at her and Alice laughs. "Don't worry, I got her under control." Alice says. I gap at them. "No one controls me." I mutter.

Alice turns on her heels and glares at me. "Oh, hush you. Go find something for us to drink." She says waving and I slump my shoulders. "Yes ma'am." I say giving her a salute before turning on my heels and heading to the shelves next to Caius.

"Hey, Caius." I say smiling at him while opening the fridge and grabing a few variarity's of soda. "Bella! How are you, darling?" he asks. I grin. "I'm good, going out for a hike." I say closing the fridge door and holding the cans in my hands.

He nods. "It's a good day to hike. By the way, who's that lovely girl over there talking to my wife?" He asks. I chuckle. "That's my girlfriend, Alice Cullen." I say. Caius nods "She's a beauty. Whats your secret?" he asks. I chuckle. "Don't get any ideas old man, she's mine." I say playfully.

He pouts then grins. "It's all right, that woman over there still wakes me up with a kiss on the cheek and a cup of coffee. I can live like that the rest of my live if she still looks at me with those eyes." He sighs.

I grin, Caius and Susannah are a match made in heaven. They have been together since there freshmen year at high school and have been madly in love since. Caius being an old romantic and Susannah just being charming they fit perfectly. You can feel the love radiating off of them and it just makes you give hope that the world isn't as black as it seems.

I sigh. "Luck old man, stick with what you got. You can't go any higher then Susannah." I say grinning. He nods. "Your right but, what about you?" He asks. I frown. "What about me?" I ask. He rolls his eyes and a fragile yet firm hand grabs mine and squeezes. "When are you going to admit to love?" He asks. I chuckle at him. "Love is not my forte, nor is it my wish." I say to him.

He rolls his eyes at me. "Then tell that to your sparkly eyes." He says and I look at him quickly. He grins. "That girl over there… she's going to love you. And love is going to change you. But, its your decision to accept the change love can do to a person and ignore the hurt of your past, child." He says.

I'm about to speak up but he cuts me off. "You may not be in love now but, you will be. Maybe not with her but with someone and love will change you. It will make all the hurt you have felt in your past vanish like if it was a stale memory. It will have no power over you and you will be better because of it." he says.

I nod accepting his words. "Thank you, Caius. I'll try to show up more often then not, give me call if you ever need anything old man." I say waking a few steps towards the cash register.

He chuckles. "I might take you up on that child." He says. I nod. "Anytime." I say as I walk away with a smile and head to the cash register I place the six caned sodas on the table thingy and take out my wallet and hand her a hundred dollar bill.

Susannah frowns at the bill. "Bella, its only $32.50" She says. I shrug. "Keep the rest. I don't need it." I say. Susannah frowns. "Bella." She says. I flash her a smile "Come on, I don't need and it at all. I won't even miss it. Just keep it Susannah." I say.

She shakes her head and I sigh. "I'll come over for diner some time?" I offer. She beams. "You will?" She asks. I nod. "Sure, I'll even bring Alice with me." I say grinning. Susannah sighs. "Fine, dear. I know there's no talking you out of it." She says. I lean forward and kiss her cheek. "That's why I care for you." I say as I pull back and start to pile all the snack's and food and stuff on the basket.

I grab the small cooler and basket in my hands and grin at her. "Tell everyone I send my care, and that I'll see them soon." I say. She nods and I look over at Caius and grins wider. "I think your man is a little lonely over there." I say.

She sighs and looks over at him. "Oh, that man. He will be the death of me." She says her eyes shining. I look in her eyes more carefully and all I can see is… love. Pure and unabashed love. I grin at her. "I'll see you all soon." I say to them.

Caius and Susannah walk me and Alice out of the store and they stay at the front of the wooden store as I place the stuff in the back and open the door for Alice. I give them another smile and big wave as I climb in and speed off.

Susannah POV

I sigh as I see the child I care for so drive off. I smile to my self. "She's grown so much, she is barely like the one we knew but so much is still the same." I say to Caius. He nods and wraps and arm around my shoulders. "True, she's stronger and more guarded. She has seen so much pain that a innocent soul must never see." He sighs next to me.

I nod in agreement and grab his hand on my shoulder and squeeze. "She just needs to have faith in God, he know's what to do. Everything he does is for a reason." I say smiling. I feel Caius sadden and look to his face, his eyes are draned out on the road where she drove off in.

"Faith is something that she has never been good at Susannah, she had faith for Charlie to move on and get better, it failed. She had faith her life would turn out bright and that accident took away something no woman should ever lose. She almost lost her life in that crash and lost something even greater. Even Charlie when alive, before the car crash could tell, faith on her is lost." Caius says sadly.

I frown and remember clearly the day Charlie asked to speak with us. "Charlie…in peace rest his soul. I can still remember the night he came here in tears… Sometimes it does make me question how many times a life can she shattered before its imposible to put together." I sigh shaking my head.

Caius kisses the top of my head. "Not to worry darling, she will find her way. She just needs to chose to do so." He says hugging me. I smile and turn to kiss his cheek "Now, no more talk of Bella. She won't be happy if she finds out we speak of her while she's not here." I say chuckling.

Caius laughs. "So, darling." He says holding my hand. His finger tips a bit colder. "Now, now my old fart. Let's warm you up, hot chocolate?" I ask leading him back to the store. He grumples. "I am not an old fart." He says. I smile. "You are, and you are mine." I say and kiss his lips quickly.

"I don't think it's possible for me to love you more then I have since the day we met." I sigh walking in to the door. He laughs. "I have loved you since then and I shall love you forever." He promises closing the door to the shop behind him.

I smile as we walk to the back room. Isabella will be alright, she just needs time and love to hear her. I just wish she would chose the right side if it came to a choice. I think to myself as I start to pour milk in a kettle.

Love, time and choices. That's all anyone ever needs.

_**A/N: I know I really didn't get into the second date! But this part is crucial to the story and seemed to flow so perfectly. With the last chapter that I just had to write it. R&R!**_


	21. Chapter 21

_**A/N: Here is the real faze two, still not the BIG date but its still one of my favorite parts of the three faze date.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**_

_**Ch.21**_

_**Bpov**_

I grin as I drive down the almost solitary road, Alice's voice breaks my concentration. "You missed them." She states. I look at her from the corner of my eye and look back to the road. I nod. "I did." I say.

"Why? Don't you see them often?" She asks. I frown "I… I haven't really been around since, um, Charlie died." I say quietly. "Oh, I'm so sorry." Alice's voice gasps. I grin at her and shake my head. "Don't worry about it. It's cool, I just. I got pretty lost after he died… hell I'm still lost. The only plus is now I have a flash light." I say giving her a grin _I just don't know how long the battery will last._ I think to myself.

I feel her hug my arm. "I'm here for you, Bella. Whenever you need someone to talk to or just someone there, I'm here. I won't let you down and I won't hurt you." She says softly. I nod and kiss the top of her head. "I know, It's just… a challenge to open up" I say.

She nods against my arm and still holds me tightly. After a few minutes we reach the trail mark. I close the roof up and climb out grabbing things. Alice grabs the cooler and I grab the quilt and food. "Its not to far, maybe a mile or two." I say. She nods and we start up the trail until a windy curve. I walk through the trees and I hear Alice stop.

I look back to see a confused Alice. I grin. "Come on, I'm not going to kill you." I say rolling my eyes. She giggles and walks behind me. "Sorry I just… I thought we were going to stay on the trial." She says. I chuckle. "Since when do I ever follow the rules?" I ask.

I hear Alice giggle behind me and we start walking again. After around fifteen minutes we finally get there. I stop and look at Alice, I grab the bandana I always keep in my back pocket and motion for her to turn around. She frowns. "What are you…" She trails off when I wrap it around her eyes. "Shh… give me a moment to set it all up and I'll be right back, do not walk around. You're just going to get hurt." I say as I grab the small cooler from her feet and walk over the huge bush and to the lovely meadow.

I ignore the stabbing pain or the sadness and quickly set up, I place the basket and cooler on the side of the blanket and use big stones to anchor it there. After I'm sure everything looks perfect I walk back out of the meadow and to a sitting Alice. I chuckle and stop infront of her. "What are you doing?" I ask and she jumps.

"Shit, Bella. I didn't hear you, you scared the crap out of me." She says laughing slighty. I chuckle. "Sorry, I just… got used to walking quietly. Anyway come on." I say grabing her arm and pulling her up.

I walk her through the thinning trees and threw the thick ferns and big bush and into the meadow. I stop right at the edge of the meadow and pull the bandana from her eyes gently. "This used to be my happy place." I say quietly.

**Apov**

"This used to be my happy place." Bella says quietly as she lifts the bandana out of my eyes. I squint in the light until my eyes adjust and I stare in shock and awe. Its breathtaking, amazing and looks like it came out of a fairytail. I try to hold in my shock but my face is a frozen mask of shock.

Deep green's on the walls, the huge bushes around it with the upper part of the perfect circle in with the deep brown trunks of the trees. It's a small clearing a meadow. Its filled with wild flowers all vibrant colors and perfectly attuned.

Bright pink, deep purple, soft blue, light green, white, violet, red, soft yellow, deep blue and soft pink. I stare in pure shock at all the wild flowers in the perfect cirle of a meadow. "Its beautiful." I say. I look to the side to see Bella looking down and a smile on her lips.

I smile back at her, she clears her though and shifts. "Um, theres a stream a few feet threw those branches and if you follow it down theres these hot springs that are amazing. The hikers normaly go to the upper mountain for the big ones but I find these to be better." She says quietly. I smile at her. "How did you find this place?" I ask.

Bella leads me to where she set up the blanket in the middle of the meadow and sits down. I sit next to her and she clears her throat. "Um, I…I was out training with Charlie and I just stumbled upon it. I haven't been here in a long time." She sighs looking around the meadow.

I frown. "How come?" I ask. She looks at me and sends me a soft grin. "Once Charlie died…I… really didn't have a mind for much." She admits looking at a flower to the side of her. I frown deeper. "You don't have to talk about it." I say, she looks up and smiles at me. "I know, I… I want you to know me. The true me, its just… difficult to let my guard down." She says frowning and plucking the flower from where it was rooted.

She looks at it in her hand for a moment before holding it out for me. "You can ask me any questions you wish, I will try my best to answer them." She says to me as I take hold of the deep red flower. I give her a smile and I see a glint in her eyes before she looks up at the sky.

I think for a moment and remember what she said before taking my blindfold off. "This used to be your happy place?" I ask. She closes her eyes and nods once. "It was." She says quietly. I frown. "How did it stop?" I ask quietly. I don't want to offend her or push her.

I just… I want to know her. I want to know why she's so guarded and what made her that way. I want to know the way she reacts to some subjects and the reason behind it. For now this is my only chance to ask her questions and I'm going to take it. Questions first apology's later.

She opens her eyes slowly and looks me in the eyes for a moment. "It stopped being that place when Charlie died. Material things… they meant nothing to me afterwards. Nothing did… somethings still don't matter to me. There all just filled with taunting memory's." She says looking in my eyes for a moment longer guarding my reaction.

I keep my face neutral and nod once. "Ok, and… why do you call your dad Charlie?" I ask. She stares at me for a moment before cracking a grin. "He hated it when I called him Charlie, he always wanted me to call him dad… even when we were training. I just got used to calling him Charlie behind his back because… for most of my childhood he was always on tours and what not." She say, her eyes glassy with a far away expersion on them.

"It was always me and my mom, on the odd ocacions that he was home I would call him Dad but once he left he was back to being Charlie. And when…" She traills off shaking her head and letting out a shaky breath "When, um. My mom died… he came back and stayed for good. I was already a semi teenager and was rebelling against him for some stupid reason." She says chuckling. "I would call him Charlie. He… he stared being dad to me the night… um… I can't. I'm sorry." She says shaking her head and her jaw clenching.

I watch her from where I sit as she clenches and unclenches her jaw, her hands fisted, her eyes closed tightly, and a small tremor running through her back. I reach forward tentatively and touch the back of her clenched hand, she flinches back. My eyes go wide and I freeze and she opens her eyes and takes a few deep breaths.

"S-sorry. Re-re-reflex." She says quicky. "Just… give me a-a mom-ment to calm d-down." She stutters. I am frozen, she's stuttering and she looks so… breakable. What happened to her? One moment she was tough ever challenging Bella and now… she looks like a haunted girl.

I wish I could pull her to me and hug her to me and tell her she's ok but, I have a feeling that would do more harm then good. After a few minutes… or five she breaths in relaxed and her muscles lossen. She looks at me from under her bangs. "Sorry, just… got lost in thought." She says.

I nod. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean for you to feel uncomfortable." I say quickly. She smiles at me. "Alice, its not your fault. I shouldn't have let the memory come at me like that. I'm good, trust me." She says giving me a grin.

It doesn't reach her eyes, they still look haunted to me. I nod, hiding any emotion form my face. "So, um. I call him Charlie because it hurts less to call him by the name of the father that I didn't get to see all that much. Then calling him Dad and morning the loss of my protector." She says not looking at me.

She's leaning forward grabing two cans of coke from the mini cooler and hands one to me. I smile at her. "Thanks." I say. She nods and cracks hers open an takes a drink. "Any more questions?" She asks with a smile. I chuckle. "Oh, just around a million more." I say.

Bella lets her head fall forward and chuckles at me, I savor the sound of her soft almost musical chuckle. "I want to know everything about you." I say. She looks back at me. "What if what you find scares you, Alice?... My past isn't all that nice." She says.

I roll my eyes. "Your not going to scare me off, if that's what your wondering." I say, she rolls her eyes. "Of course not, who would ever think the pixie would be scared." She says sarcastically and gives me a grin and I laugh at her. "Your crazy." I say.

She grins at me. "Only for you." She says her voice smooth and even. I look in her eyes for a long moment before looking down and bite my lip to keep from smiling like an idiot. I run a hand through my short hair trying to process this girl, she's so confusing.

I feel a warm hand cup my cheek and lift it up to stare at her. She runs her thumb from my jaw line to my lips where she tugs on my lip to pull it from my mouth. Her warm black brown eyes, they burn in to my hazle eyes.

She leans forward for a moment and once were an inch apart she stops for a moment. I slowly cup her cheek and look in her eyes. "Alice.." She say quietly. I smile slightly at her half hooded eyes before pulling her head to mine.

Our lips touch and all I can focus on is the electric current running all through my body. The buzz behind my skin making it hard to consentrate on anything that isn't Bella. Her free hand grab's by hand –the one with the soda- and she takes the can away from me before discarding it somewhere.

A moment passes and then she starts to lean forward, pushing me back. I let her, loving the feeling of her covering me. Her strong and warm body making a barrier against the outside world.

Right now she has me pinned against the soft blanket, one hand on my neck her thumb grazing over my jaw line every once in a while. Her other is next to my head, her elbow holding her weight off of me.

My hand is on her neck and the other in her hair. I feel Bella shift above me for a moment then stay still. I frown a bit, what's up with her? I slowly break the sweet kiss. I'm breathing a bit more heavy then usual but nothing unmanageable. I can stop the smile that creeps on my face when Bella pulls back and opens her eyes.

"Your to tempting when you bite your lip." She says quietly before touching her lips to mine again quickly licking my bottom lip before pulling back. I slowly start to get up and look at Bella who is sitting Indian style in front of me.

She gives me a grin and I playfully glare at her. "That wasn't nice." I tell her. She grins wide almost turning in to a smirk. "Really? I thought it was fabulous." She says. I smile at her. "Oh, it was. It just wasn't nice to tease me." I say. She lifts one eyebrow. "You tease me on a daily basis. It seemed fair for you to have a taste of your medicine." She says with a shrug.

I grin at her and lean forward until I'm an inch away from her. "Then good thing my dad's a doctor, isn't it?" I ask. "How so?" She asks her eyes glued to mine. I grin. "He taught me to like drinking medicine." I say before leaning forward quickly and connecting our lips.

I kiss her for a long while, both of us on our knees body's pressed together. I let my hand drop from her shoulder and I tap her leg, trying to communicate without having to breath the kiss.

Bella stays put as she is and continues to kiss me, I fight the urge to roll my eyes as I hook my hand behind her knee and pull towards me. Bella losing her balance falls back on her butt and I try to fight my laugh at her shoked face.

I can't help it and giggle as I lean forward and touch my lips to hers, giggling in between kisses. "You should…. Have just… listened to me." I say kissing her. She places a hand on my cheek and the other on my neck pulling me even closer. "I didn't know… what… this… meant." She says mimicking the double tap on my leg.

I hear her humm and then I remember for a moment I am wearing a short skirt with thin blue leggings, a fitting blue long sleeved shirt with a black cardigan and skirt. She kisses me pasionetly, not moving her hand from my leg. Instead she hooks her hand behind my leg and she starts to lean back.

I can't protest, it's what I wanted. I straddle Bella's lap and continue to kiss her while she moves her thumb on my leg. She doesn't move her hand and I don't know whether to be happy or frustrated.

A soft moan escapes me when Bella tugs on my hair and I can feel her smirk againt my lips before I lean forward more and have her pinned under me. After a moment I pull away grinning and sit back, Bella sits up and gives me a grin and reaches to the side for her can of soda.

I reach forward and grab mine and take a drink of it. "So… you never really told me about Phoenix." I say. Bella looks at me for a moment and shrugs. "What do you want to know about it?" she asks again.

I shrug. "What do you miss the most?" I ask. She frowns for a moment. "The house where I lived in most of my life." She says. I turn my head to the side. "Why?" I ask. She snorts a bit in to her can before chuckling. "Because… it has all the memories of my mom and dad. In a way it is better and in another its worse. But… Phoenix, it has way to many bad memories." She says taking a drink of her soda.

I frown, I know it's where her mom died but… what else happened to have so many bad memories. I don't want to push her so I change the subject. "Favorite music genres." I ask. She smiles. "Rock." She says. I raise an eyebrow. "Oh? So you're a rocker chick?" I ask.

She rolls her eyes and shrugs. "I like all type's of music really. All depends on my mood but rock is one of my favorites." She says. I nod and she redirects the question to me. "I like pop and dance music." I say.

She grins. "Not surprised." She says and reaches for the baskets and grabs some food and places it infront of us. I smile. "Why is that?" I aks. She shrugs "You look like a dancer." She says poping a Dorito in her mouth.

I lift an eyebrow in question as I take a chip and eat it. "Um, well, you know. You look… dancy." She mumbles. I look at her and laugh. "Dancy?" I ask. She sighs. "Fine, the truth is well… you look like a ballerina, you walk with grace." She says.

I smile and laugh softly. "I used to do ballet when I was younger, but I grew out of it." I say. She laughs. "You grew out of it?" She asks and I pout. "Must you poke fun at my height?" I ask.

She shrugs. "Not really, so if it bugs you I will stop." She says. I shrug. "Nah, I'm over the whole being short thing." I say. She nods and smiles as she leans forward to wisper in my ear. "If you ask me, you being so short is really adorable… and sexy." She adds and pulls back.

I shudder for a moment and grin. "Tease." I say. She laughs. "If anything you're the tease, no one should be allowed to be so sexy." She says with a grin. I raise an eyebrow. "So, you think I'm sexy?" I ask. She gulps a bit and nods. "Incredibly so." She says eating yet another chip.

I grin, sweet! She things I'm sexy. "But, don't start getting ideas, I'm adamant at keeping you all to myself." She says smirking at me. I smile. "So, no wild three-some in the girls locker room, huh?" I ask jokingly. Bella who was taking a drink of her soda laughs and starts to cough.

I laugh. "Fuck, that burns." She says couching. I try to hold in my giggles but fail and I hear Bella growl at me. "You think that's funny?" She asks. I look in her eyes and she theres a bit of mirth there but can't help that the look on her face is way to funny.

I giggle even more. "Hahaha, sorry, but, hahaha, yeah your funny, hahaha." I say laughing. I hear Bella growl at me and before I know it I'm pinned against the blanket her hovering over me with a cocky expression on her face.

"Let's see how funny I can be, no?" She asks her eyes burning in mine before she lowers her lips to graze mine. She trails her lips down to my neck and starts to nibble at the skin there. "Shit." I breath when she start to place open mouth kisses on my neck.

She kisses the hell out of my neck and before I can take it she lifts her head up and kisses me. She kisses me with a hunger I don't think I have ever felt from her, a primal hunger that I can't wait to figure out.

But, before it can get to anything Bella pulls away and rolls over to the side panting. "Not so… funny now… huh?" She asks in between pants. I look over at her to see a shit eating grin on her face. I laugh. "No… not funny at all." I say shaking my head.

She leans on one elbow and leans forward to place a peck on my lips before she pulls away and sits on the blanket next to me. She reaches around me for a peice of fruit and pop's in a grape in her mouth.

"So, how you liking the meadow?" She asks feeding me a grape. I grin and take it from her hand and chew carefully before swallowing and answering. "Its amazing, thank you for trusting me enough to bring me here." I say looking up at her.

She smiles down at me for a moment. "Anytime, I just want to show you… truly show you that your not just some other girl to me. Your not like anyone I have ever met and I have never felt this comfortable with anyone other then you, I just want to show you that you mean a lot to me." She says quietly looking in my eyes, when she finishes what she says she averts her eyes to one of the bushes on the far side of the meadow.

I sit up a bit and capture her hand in mine. She looks at me for a moment before I hug her tightly. "You mean a lot to me too." I say and hug her to me. She wraps her arms around me and hugs me tightly, after a long moment of silence she breaks it.

"You know, you really have made me a wuss. I used to be all tough and stuff but you have made me soft." She says jokingly. I pull away in mock offence. "Why, Bella. I would never! If anything you were always a wuss as you say and just covered it up by being so guarded." I joke to her.

She places a hand on her chest. "You hurt me woman." She says. And we share a look before exploding into laughter. After we calm down she pokes my sides and I squirm being as tickleish as I am. "I can't believe you called me a wuss." She says poking me. I laugh and squirm. "Darling, you called yourself a wuss, I just told you what you called yourself." I remind her.

She rolls her eyes and brings the sole of her hand to her forehead in a face palm movement. "Oh, right sorry." She says sarcastically eating a berry from her hand. I sit up completely and Bella shifts a bit to be an inch away from me. She grabs some more food and motions for me. "Eat, Alice. If you don't you're going to vanish in thin air." She jokes. I roll my eyes. "Like your any better." I say.

Bella laughs. "This," She says motioning to her whole body "Is all muscle honey." She says with a grin. I let my eyes roam over her slowly but her clothes are to baggy, I sigh. "Your clothes are to baggy, I could never tell." I say with a shrug as I pop a chip in to my mouth.

She smirks. "Like you have never seen me." She muses rolling her eyes. I gasp. "I haven't." I say. She smirks. "Hmm… then I guess I broke a rule haven't I?" She says seriously. I gasp at her. "What?!" I ask. And Bella falters, she cracks a smile and starts laughing so hard tears come out of her eyes.

"Oh my god, I can't believe… you actually… fell for it…. oh my god… your face…. So worth it…" She says in between laughs. I breath a sigh of relief and mock punch her arm. "You thought that was funny huh?" I ask before I start tickling her. Which causes her to laugh again that she's grabing her sides. "I can't… breathe… Alice… stop…" She says knocking my hands out of the way.

I free one and keep tickling her until she leans forward and pins both my hands above my head. She grins down at me before hiding her head on my shoulder trying to catch her breath. She doesn't loosen the hold she has on my hands. She stays there so long I actually think she feel asleep.

If it weren't for her tight hold on my hands I would swear she's sleeping. Her head is in my neck and her breathing is even. "Bella… you asleep?" I ask softly. Her shoulders shake a bit and her head shakes against my shoulder. "No, just comfy." She says, her voice muffled by my shoulder.

I lean my head back down an just cherish the feeling of the sun on my skin. I tug a bit on my hands and surprisingly she lets them go, I roll up my sleeves and place a hand on her hair and start to run my hands through it.

I sigh and lean back just staring at the sky, after what seems like an eternity but could possibly just be half an hour she stirs and lift herself up off from me. "You are very comfy. Like a soft pillow." She says before sitting up. I chuckle. "Why thank you, its an off day when someone tells me I'm not comfy." I say.

Bella chuckles. "Why don't we finish up this picnic and then I can take you home so you can get ready for faze three of our date." She says. I lift an eyebrow "I though you were kiddng. This is only part of the date?" I aks. She nods "Yup, the real mind blowing part of the date will be later tonight. I'll have you back at eleven sharp don't worry, make sure to tell your parents that." She says.

I nod and with that we spend a couple of hours more in the meadow. Just talking and eating and lying down. At one point we layed down and started picking images from clouds.

Bella wouldn't though, she would just stare at the sky lost in thought before I would pick one out and she would smile and laugh and agree. She never offered an image from the clouds and that just got me to think… does she even know the purpouse of this small game.

"Bella, you do know your supposed to offer some images right?" I ask looking to the side. We were both laying down but with my head propped on her stomach so we formed the 'T' She looks down at me, her head being propped up by the basket and shrugs. "I don't see anything up there unless you point it out." She says.

I frown. "What you mean?" I ask. She looks down at me for a moment and I can see the battle in her eyes, before she takes a breath. "I just… its stupid really but all I see are big blobs of clouds… I don't really have an imagination per say." She says.

I turn to give her my full attention. "What do you mean you don't have imagination? Everyone does." I state. She nods. "I know, I just. I can't pick out a shape in them and chose what to imagine. But, once you tell me what one looks like I can see it. Its weird, that's why I say I just don't have an independent imagination. Mine is strictly dependant." She says with a small smile.

I frown… maybe I should ask Carlisle about that… "Don't worry Alice, I talked about it with a doctor. He says its some form of delayed post tramatic stress. Nothing to serious." She says running a hand through my hair.

I give her a small smile and nod. "Good." I mumble before return to the game. After half an hour more Bella sighs. "The clouds are going to cover the sun any moment now, let me get you back home before it starts raining." She says. I frown, I don't want to leave. I look up at the sky and see that she's right.

The clouds are moving in quickly. With a sigh I get up and stand, Bella chuckles at my expression. "Don't worry, I'll bring you back here anytime you want." She says giving me a first in my eyes crinkly grin.

I smile brightly at her, she's letting me in. I can tell, I've found out so much about her today and her about me. Its great and just to think, we have another part of this date to have later today. Nothing can falter my mood.

Bella and I start to pick up our stuff and placing everything trash like in a bag to be disposed off in the trash bin at the beginning of the trail. Once were set up to walk Bella empties out the empty cooler letting the ice on a corner and gives me the empty plastic bin.

I roll my eyes and grab the trash bag before she reaches it. "I can handle some weight Bella." I say rolling my eyes. She sends me a small smile. "Sorry, I'm just used to.. yeah." She says shaking her head.

We make our way into the forest and after twenty mnutes were back in the car driving down the road. Bella honks loudly when we pass the store and I guess that's her way of telling them she's back.

Before I know it, Bella is pulling up to my driveway. She places the car in park before turning to look at me with a grin. "I'll see you tonight." She says. I nod. "Tonight." I say. She leans forward a bit but stops right in front of my lips. "What are the chances Emmett is going to push me against my car again if I kiss you?" she asks.

I giggle. "Slim to none." I say placing a hand on her neck. "Hmm… I like those chances." She says before bringing me to her for a quick kiss. She leans back and shrugs at me look. "I'm not taking to many chances when it comes to your siblings." She says.

I laugh and get out of the car and she looks at me in shock. "You can handle the door?" She asks. I roll my eyes. "Yeah, I can." I say. She frowns. "So then why do you always act like you have trouble with it?" She asks. I grin sheepishly. "I like it when you open the door for me." I say.

I look up to see her grin. "Good, I like that detail too." She says before leaning forward and giving me a quick peck before I close the car door and walk to my front door. I hear her honk when she pulls out and I chuckle. I open the door and lean against it for a moment before making my way to the kitchen. "Mom, I'm home." I say.

Mom looks behind her and smiles. "Hi, honey. Have a great day with Bella?" She asks. I nod and smile. "Yeah, we had an amazing breakfast and an awesome lunch picnic. And later tonight she's taking me out." I say smiling. Mom beames at me. "I'm so happy for you honey, I'm glad you two are having fun. You deserve some time alone after how your siblings have acted." She says.

I nod. "Yeah, thanks mom. Well, I'm gong to take a nap." I say before turning on my heels and heading out. I'm in the doorway when my phone buzzes. I stop and read the text I received.

'Hey, Al. Sry but I'll need to pick you up at 8, I need to fix a little detail that has been ruined by the rain. Remember to tell your parents when you will be back. See ya! ~B

I chuckle before typing back.

'Ok, its cool. More time for my nap. I'll tell them, till then. ~A

Her reply is almost immediate.

'Awww, your like a cat with its naps! I'll see if I can call you Allicat! So adorable, lol. Anyway you better! I don't want them thinking I kidnapped you, later. ~B

I roll my eyes and go back to the kitchen were Esme is at. "Mom, I'll be leaving at eight and I'll be back at eleven." I say to her. She turn and smiles. "Alright honey, just be careful. Better late and alive then early and dead." She says.

I nod. "Will do." I say and yawn. "As for you, go take your nap Alice. Your tired." Mom says. I smile softly and go to her and hug her, I snuggle in deeper when she hugs me back. "I love you, mom." I say. Mom sighs happily. "I love you too, Alice." She says giving me one final squeeze before shooing me to my room.

I walk over to my desk and place the deep read wild flower there next to a pad of paper before i head back to my bed. Once I get there I sigh and drop down on my bed. I snuggle in to my bed and set my alarm quickly for seven, that will give me a hour to get ready. Before letting sleepiness consume me.

_**A/N: Awww, cute chapter! Alice all sweet and Bella so open, don't worry nothing is wrong with Bella. She's just to depressed to see figures in the clouds its nothing serious. Till the future!**_


	22. Chapter 22

_**A/N: here it is! finally the date! Review! **_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**_

_**Ch.22**_

_**Bpov**_

"What do you mean you can't help me?" I ask into the phone. "I'm sorry Miss Swan, but I am booked for the rest of the month. If there was anyway to help you out, I would." Laurent says in to the phone.

I restrain my growl. "Laurent you told me you had me on that list! I've told you to put me on that list since last month! So, explain that to me." I state. He sighs. "Miss Swan, I know I had a record of you having that reservation but it seemes someone crossed it out and placed the other name on top." He says.

I laugh. "Easy, scratch that name out an put mine back in!" I say. Theres a clicking sound before it all goes quiet. "I can't, the boat just left the dock with all its passengers inside." He says.

"What! You have got to be kidding me? I thought the boat wasn't supposed to leave until… you now what, forget it. I will manage, thank you for your help." I say before snaping the phone shut.

I quickly turn flip it back and call my good friend Damien. "Damien, look. I'm sorry for the short notice but I need your help." I say. "Why, whats wrong? Are you ok?" He asks. I role my eyes. "Um, yeah. I just… I need to barrow your sevices for the night." I say. There's silence. "How much of a distance is it?" He asks.

I grin, "A small tour around Port Angeles." I say. He's quiet. "Sure, thing boss." He says. I smile. "Fill up the tank and I'll pay you tomorrow. Just be at the lot in Port Angeles at eight thirty." I say.

"Awesome! Am I to suspect a lady friend is coming?" He asks. I smirk. "Yeah, and She's mine. So don't think about it." I say with a laugh. "Darn, no chance you'll break up with her?" He asks. I laugh. "You haven't even seen her and you want her?" I ask incredulesly.

"Well, if she's with you. She must be hot, boss.." He says. I sigh. "True… but no. Not a chance." I say grinning, he laughs and we hang up. With a sigh I sit on my couch, nothings wrong with a little catnap. I lean down and chance a look at the painting and grimace. I am so tired of feeling numb, thank god for Alice.

She makes my living bearable, she makes it worth it… I hope it always stay's like this. I sigh and snuggle into my couch. Nothings wrong with a small nap…. I quickly put an alarm to wake me up an hour before I need to pick up Alice and without realizing it, I fell a sleep quickly.

The noise that could only be defined as my fucking alarm clock woke me up. I glared at it before shutting it off. With a sigh I get up and walk up the stairs to get ready a grin crosses my face when I think about what I have planed for Alice tonight, she's going to flip out. With a chuckle I grab a towel and go to my shower.

**Apov (A/n: I want you guys to be surprised by the date too.)**

I'm practically buzzing. I did everthing there is to do.

Finish makeup, check. Long sleved, close fitted white turtle neck (that bella loves), check. Black vest that Bella loves, check. Black skinny jeans, check. Black boots that Bella says I look hot in, check. Hair done down the way Bella has never seen, check. Cell phone, check. $50 dollars I leave no where without, check. Gum, check.

Anything else I can live without. I grin as I sit down on my desk and look at the flower I put in a small vase filled with water. I take out a pice of my sketch board and start drawing to kill the time, I still have twenty minutes before Bella gets here.

I focus on shading, curves and materials I want for this dress. I'm so intent on it I jump when I hear a, "Wow." Come from the door way. "Shit." I jump and look behind me quickly.

I sigh in relief. "Oh, it's just you Jazz. What's up?" I ask as I turn around again and erase the line I had drawn when I got scared. "Nothing, Mom just told me to come up here and tell you that Bella just arrived." He says.

I look behind me to see him lean on the frame of the door, I smile. "Thank's Jazz." I say and stand up to hug him. Edward and I are close, but it's always been me and Jazz to have all the heart to hearts.

I hug him tightly and he hugs me back. "You look, beautiful darling'." He says, his southern accent coming out at the end. I chuckle. "Why thank you." I say mimicking his accent.

He doesn't even realize when he falls in that accent and its so funny to see him try to keep it out. I chuckle and pull away when I'm hit by his perfume, musky, I realize it's the one I bough him for his birthday three months ago.

Then I remember, "Oh, I forgot to put on perfume." I state as I turn around and head to my dresser. I look at in and frown, witch one should I use? Vanilla or floral. "Hmm…" I ponder.

People would call me stupid, but. If your perfume clashes with your outfit it was a fail. It's one of my many corks, I smile and gram the vanilla one. It will fit in good with my laid back but still beautiful look.

I spray it on me and sigh when I feel Jazz's hand on my back, I'm calm instantly only to tense up when he grabs my hips and pulls me to him. "Jazz, what the hell are you dong?" I ask.

Then I pay more attention to what is pressing on my back, boobs. I frown and go to turn my head backwards to see who it is when the voice speaks. "You look completely too tempting." The voice says lowly in my ear.

I grin. "Hello, Bella." I say and turn quickly around. Bella wraps an arm around me waist and looks down at my body slowly and smiles. "You really look beautiful tonight, Alice. I love your hair too. Not that I don't love your spiky look its just, I like both." She rants and I chuckle and give her a swift kiss on the lips.

"I know what you mean, silly." I say chuckling. She gives me a small smile and pulls apart from me, I quickly give her a once over. And I love what she's wearing.

Red and black button up shirt with a black collar poping out of it. Black skinny jeans with a hip chain on it and her boots. Her hair is her usual sex hair gel style and… wow. She looks hot.

"Like what you see?" She asks giving me a smirk, her eyes playful. I nod twice. "Very much, I'm just worried about one simple thing." I say and look down. She takes two steps closer to me quickly and cups my face. "What?" She asks. "I'm worried about how many girls and guys I will have to beat off with a stick to get them away from you." I say grinning up at her.

She laughs lowly. "None, atleast not tonight. And besides… call me whenever you decide to do that, it is something I would defenetly like to see." She says grinning. I laugh softly. "I'll be sure to do just that." I say chuckling.

Bella smiles. "Well, we should get going now. We have a long night ahead." She says with a grin. I smile brightly up at her. "Any chance at all your going to tell me what we will be doing?" I ask.

She grins and leans forward to place a quick kiss on my lips before pulling back with a, "Nope." And grabbing my hand and leading me out of my room, she walks next to me letting me lead her down.

Maybe she's not comfortable with my family yet? I shrug and lead her down the stairs and to the loft. My parents are standing there, shit. I hope Dad doesn't give Bella 'the talk' cuz that would just be awkward as hell.

I entwine our fingers and Bella looks down at me for a moment and sends me a half smile. I smile back and look at my parents. "Well, you ladies have fun. Bella, as we discussed." Dad says.

I look at Bella and see her nod once and send him a charming smile, oh, she's going to dazzle my dad huh?... Impressive. I have to ask her how she does that. "Of course, Carlisle. I would never dare to break your rules, nor do I wish for Alice to get in trouble. I'll take good care of her, sir." She says and sends him her crooked smile.

Hmm… I think Edward has that one too. It almost always works, I look over to dad to see him beaming with a glint in his eyes. Oh, she has him eating out of the palm of her hand. I try to suppress my chuckle with a soft sigh. Bella turns to me, and sends me a wink before looking back at my dad.

"Very well, off you go. Before the siblings come and ruin your fun." Dad says and I chuckle, Bella growls and her shoulders square off. I sigh and place a hand on her arm and smile a bit when she relaxes.

Mom look in between us and has a huge smile on her face. "Go on now dear's. I'll see you soon Bella." She says. Bella smiles another charming smile. "Will do Esme, I'll see if I can have that receipe for you and send it with Alice. I'm glad you liked the pie." She says.

I furrow my brow's. "What pie?" I ask. Bella smiles down at me. "Oh, I had some home made chocolate pie and I know your mother has a sweet tooth like yourself so I brought her some… Don't give me that look. I'll have plenty of chocolate pie where we are going." She says grinning down at me.

I release my glare and smile. "Good, cuz now I'm hungry." I say. Bella chuckles. "When aren't you? You're like a bottomless pit, how are you even so skinny?" She jokes. I grin and wink at her. "I'm a pixie, magic, duh." I say.

My parents and Bella laugh at my joke. "Ok, we should get going." Bella says looking at her watch. Mom smiles. "Don't rush, better late and alive then dead and early." Bella shudders a bit but nods.

"Sure thing, Esme. Have a good night you two, Carlisle." She says. She gives my mom a hug and Carlisle a nod. He nods back to her and mom and dad hug me. I blow my bangs out of my eyes only to see Bella looking at the floor with a small frown tugging her lips.

"Love you, Alice." Mom and dad say. I smile at them and pull back. "Love you, too." I say as I take a step back and grab Bella's hand. She looks up with me with a smile, it doesn't reach her eyes. I don't let if faze me but I know I failed when Bella's eyebrows scrunch up a bit before relaxing back in to her composed charming smile.

"Good-bye." She says and leads me out the door. My parents walk us to the door and Bella leads me down the steps and to her Mercedes. She opens the door for me and I slide in. She closes the door for me and walks around the front of the car and gets into hers quickly, she shuts the door and after we buckle up she turns the car on and music blast threw the speakers.

"Shit, I'm sorry." Bella says quickly pressing the buttons to her radio until the volume goes down. I laugh. "It's ok, Bella." I say laughing softly as she turns her car on and pulls out of my drive way.

Once she reaches the highway she grins at me. "Buckle up." She says before hitting the gas and launching us forward. My eyes are wide as Bella swerves between the rarely seen cars of the highway. "Bella, why are you in such a hurry to get to Port Angeles?" I ask.

She chuckles. "This isn't even that fast." She says slowing down a bit. I relax a bit and she laughs. "Besides, we were running a bit late. Not anymore." She says grinning. I sigh and lean my head back and I hear the music go up in volume.

I listen to the lyrics carefully and frown. "What song is this?" I ask Bella, looking at her. She looks at me with a small smile. "Breed 77, Zombie cover." She says. I nod against the lyrics.

"What's the song about?" I ask. Bella looks at me and gives me a soft smile before looking back on the road. "Well, its about war. How al quaeda didn't really think before attacking, they though about there religion yet they killed so many on 9/11, there just zombies of there government. About how a mother feels when she gets the card that tells them there child got killed and how the silence rings throughout all the area." She says.

She takes a breath and speaks. "They actually make a reference about the 2001 war. In other words its saying that we want peace yet we don't get it, they take our children to war and they don't think for themselves. It has a lot of different meanings you just have to pay attention to the lyrics." She says.

I nod and we fall in to a silence the rest of the ride to Port Angeles. Once we get to an air strip I frown. "What are we doing?" I ask her. Bella laughs. "Don't worry, I'm not kidnapping you." She says getting out of her car. She makes her ways to me and opens my door.

I get out and follow her through the gate and I see her chat with a few people before laughing and walking with me again. "Sorry, I known everyone here since I was a kid." She says putting her arm around me and pulling my close, she lowers her head still walking and sniffs my neck.

"Mmmm, you smell like vanilla… I wonder what you taste like… I never really did give you that hello kiss." She says. I'm about to tell her to stop being silly when she kisses me passionately.

I knot my hand in her hair and pull her impossibly closer to me, I feel the corners of her mouth pull up before she places her arm around my hip and hugs me to her. After a moment Bella moans in to the kiss before pulling away, bitting my lips softly as she does.

Shit, that's hot. I can't help but connect our lips again and do the same to her before the kiss breaks and she smiles down at me. Her eyes go to the corner and she grins wider. "That's our ride." She says.

I frown. "Our what?" I ask as I look in the same direction. My mouth falls open. "No way in hell." I say shoked. I hear Bella laugh. "Oh, yes way." She says in my ear. "Bella! This is insane!" I say laughing in disbelief.

In front of me is a black helicopter. Yes, you read that right. Helicopter. Its black with a white 'V' on the side. "This is the company's helicopter. I normaly use it for business trips around the state and what not." She says walking toward it.

I grab her hand and follow her. "You… you own it?" I ask. She nods. "Yes, Alice. I own the helicopter." She says chuckling. "H… how rich are you, Bella?" I ask. She chuckles. "I am one of the riches teen's in the world." She says quietly. My eyes bulge out of there sockets when she shrugs it off.

"I can't even access all of my money, not yet anyway. But I have enough to last me a few lifetimes." She says. I nod and she lifts me into the helicopter, she gets in behind me and closes the door behind herself before straping me in and then straping herself in.

She taps the shoulder of the man out front twice, "Lets move out." She says. He nod. "Alright, boss." He says before flipping some switches and starting off. My eyes are glued to the view, I had never been in a helicopter so this is amazing.

I feel Bella's arm slip around my waist and she rest her head back. The whole ride is passed with sweet kisses, Bella pointing out things to me and her laugh at my shocked face.

"Bella, this is amazing." I say as the helicopter fly's over a wooded area just on verge of Port Angeles. "It is, I'm happy you like it." she says. I hug her and snuggle my face in her neck. "This doesn't even seem real." I say, I hope she know's I'm not talking about the view.

She chuckles "I know what you mean, though if it isn't real… I wish to stay asleep forever, because this dream is way to good." She says. I smile and get lost in her amazing perfume, freesia, strawberry and lavender.

Just then the moment is broken when the pilot speaks. "Yo, boss. Sorry to interrupt but, where do you want me to drop your off?" He asks. Bella sighs. "Right where we got on." She says. He nods and gives her a salute and she roles her eyes before placing a kiss on my head.

"Whenever you want a ride, just tell me. I can get him to fly us whenever you want." Bella says. I chuckle. "I wouldn't have the guts." I say. She shrugs. "Fine, so let make a better deal. Whenever we feel stressed out we go on a flight." She suggests. I shrug and nod, it's a rarity when I get stressed so it wouldn't be sutch a pang to her wallet.

Once the helicopter lands on the parking of the small airport. Bella waits for the propellers to be off completely before opening the door and steping out, she extends her hand out for me and I take it and hop out just to be hugged to Bella. I laugh when she starts twirling us around.

I laugh at the playful side of Bella, I can't get enough. To bad I almost never see it, I will make it my mission to make this playful, funny and amazing girl to be around all the time with me instead of the guarded, cold, cocky girl I met.

Bella says bye to the pilot and I wave in good-bye, he nods back to me. Bella grabs my hand and we walk out to her car. "You want something to eat?" She asks me once we reach the car. I nod and she grins and opens the door for me.

I slide in and she closes the door before walking quickly to her side and getting in. "I wanted to organize something a bit more romantic but he canceled on me, so I hope your not disappointed with this little restaurant." She says before pulling out and driving down streets.

"Bella, you just took me on a helicopter ride! No one, can ever top what you just did for me. I can never be disappointed with something you put so much effort in making possible." I say to her.

She smiles to her self and nods twice. "Ok… here we go." She says as she pulls in to the small Italian restaurant. "La Bella Italia." I chuckle at the name. "Fitting." I say to her. She grimaces a bit. "Yeah, I like the food here. There mushroom ravioli is to die for." She says steping out of the car. I get out on my own and Bella rolls her eyes. I shrug. "It was out of the way, I can handle the door." I say.

She chuckles. "I know, I just like the small act of kindness." She says walking over to me and pinning me against the car. "Really? I like another act of kindness…" I say looking in her eyes before leaning forward and capturing her lips with mine.

We kiss for a long moment and Bella pulls back with a smile. "Yeah, I like that one too." She says before leading me to the restaurant. The waitress eyes Bella for a moment before her eyes landing on me.

Her smile grows and I just shrug it off as kindness. "Good evening, how are you two doing this fine evening?" She asks. Bella nods. "We're good, now can I get a table for two, preferably in a private area." She states rather then asks.

The woman nods once. "Of course, follow me please." She says before walking to the back area of the small restaurant. Once we get to a secluded area with candles on the table and nothing looks like the old restaurant she seats us and says to wait for a moment.

Bella smiles to herself for a moment before looking at me. "I have no idea what to talk about, you know." She says. I laugh. "Neither do I." I admit. Just then the woman comes back with a pad of paper. "Hello, again. What can I get you for drinks?" She asks as she places two menu's on the table.

Bella looks to me and I shrug. "Coke?" I ask. Bella nods. "Two cokes." She says. "Alright, and to eat?" She asks. Bella doesn't even look at the menu. "The mushroom ravioli, bread sticks and whatever it is she desires." Bella says looking at me.

I scan the menu quickly and pick a quick dish. "Just the chiken fetuciny." I say. The woman who I can't remember the name to… maybe it was Reese or something. Either way she noted it quickly before excusing herself.

"So, how was your cat nap?" She asks. I grin and blush a bit, I can't tell her about my dream. It's not appropriate, at all. Apparently even though I had gotten over it, my mind had not gotten over that kiss in the meadow.

"Alice?" She asks. I look up at her to see her looking at me worriedly. "I'm fine, I just… spaced out for a bit." I say before coughing. She chuckles. "I could tell." She says smirking at me.

"So…. Your cat nap, did you have a dream?" She asks again. I nod. "Yes, um… you were in it." I say looking down at the table playing with the hair at the nape of my neck, my other hand stretched on the table. Bella places her hand on mine. "You don't have to tell me if it makes you uncomfortable, I just… I was looking for a topic." She says.

I nod and the wiatress comes over with our drinks. "If there's anything at all please let me know." She says looking at me, I smile at her, she's a very nice woman.

Our diner is passed in a calm and relaxing conversatioin, Bella ask's me about my childhood and I ask her about interests. I know she wanted to inlist in the air force but with her father dead she was the last heir to the industry so she choose that.

We spent most of the night just talking and laughing quietly telling stories and debating before I know it I'm already at my house kissing Bella goodbye. Her kiss once again is animalistic, a crussiail hunger and I love it.

When I pull away its in a happy daze. "What do I owe that one for?" I ask. She chuckles and kisses my neck. "The waitress, she kept checking you out. I'm surprised you couldn't tell I was practically green." She says kissing my neck. I chuckle breathless. "Didn't notice, to bussy… fuck, to bussy looking at you." I say.

Bella chuckles and pulls back and kisses my forehead, lips and hand once more before departing. "What a perfect Ending to a perfect day." Mumble quietly as I open the door and close it. I check out my cell phone and see its 10:57pm.

"Smart girl Bella, smart girl." I mumble as I walk up the steps, I feel like I'm flying. I can't wipe the smile off my face, Bella is amazing and even better, she's all mine! Can life get any better?

_**A/N: At last! The date is past us! I hope you guys liked it! It was so hard to make something up that would knock out Alice in the emotional area.**_


	23. Chapter 23

_**A/N: Glad you liked the chapter! Now, is where it starts getting twist and turney.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT…**_

_**Ch.23**_

_**Bpov.**_

_One week after the date, its Friday._

God, if there is one. Give me patience! And give me the strength to pull away right now. "God, Alice." I manage to get out while kissing her neck. We're at my house, on my couch, our homework scattered on the floor and coffee table.

At this moment I was trying to explain math to Alice… again. She's smart as hell but she confuses some formulas. I was trying to concentrate on explaining how to use PI in the formula when she started kissing my neck and me being horny as fuck because I haven't gotten laid in a looong time.

Well ok, its been a month and a half maybe two but, remember your talking to a person who is used to having sex almost four days a week. So, yeah. I have a serious case of blue balls, rhetorically speaking.

I break apart from her lips and again trail down her neck until I reach the collar of her shirt, I groan in frustration. Why does she still have this on? I lower the hand that was on her neck and trail it down slowly until I reach the collar of her shirt then I move to the side of her body, running it along her ribs and down to her silk skinned stomach.

I shudder when she tugs at the hair at the nape of my neck and I connect my lips with hers while my hand goes to the hem of her shirt. I play with the hem of her shirt before sliding my hand under it and leaving it there, testing her.

She doesn't react so I start moving it across her smooth and flat stomach and slowly trail it up until I reach right under her breast, I haven't touched it and she already tensed up. I hold in a sad sigh and take my hand out of her shirt and pull away quickly. I sit back and lean my head back on the couch and am silently beating myself up.

Of course she's not ready for sex with you, you idiot! Shit… she's probably only had sex with her ex-girlfriend…. What the fuck was that girls name?... Who gives a fuck?! Maybe she's hung up on that girl, shit.

I open my eyes and look forward to see Alice staring at me. I send her a soft smile and get up. "Want something to drink?" I ask politely. She shakes her head and I walk over to the kitchen and grab a bottle of Mike's hard lemonade and twist the cap off.

I sigh and lean against the counter and look out the window while a take a long swig, humming in pleasure as I taste the alcohol in it. I pull away from it and purse my lips while I look out the window. I shouldn't have acted like this, its not Alice's fault I'm acting like a jerk.

With a sigh I walk back to the living room where Alice is working intently on her homework. Yup, I am a jerk. I sit down next to her and she ignores me and continues working. I just sit there quietly watching her work on her math.

After a few minutes she groans and is about to erases the hole process. I grab her hand to stop her and take the paper from her, I read it over and place it on her lap. "You just have this part wrong, convert this with PI and devide it." I say quietly before sitting back and taking a sip of my drink.

Alice doesn't show any emotion as she does what I tell her to do and she finishes it. Once she's done she shuts her notebook and places it on the coffee table. I lift my head and sigh. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have acted like that, I… I shouldn't have moved so fast for you. I'm sorry." I say running a hand through my hair.

Alice sighs. "I thought you told me to tell you when I felt uncomfortable or if I thought you were moving to fast?" She asks. I frown and slump my head. "I did and I mean it-" I'm cut off. "Then why did you act like that?" she asks.

I sigh. "I told you, I'm not a girl who is used to waiting. It's just a tuff habit to break. But, I wasn't mad at you, I was pissed at myself for going to fast and acting the way I did." I say taking a drink from the bottle.

"A-and I was a bit jealous. Jealous of what's your ex-girlfriend, that she was able to-" I'm cut off by Alice hugging me. "Your really bad at guessing." She mumbles in my neck. I frown but hug her back to me. "Why's that?" I ask confused.

"Bella… if you couldn't tell by my reaction, I-I'm a virgin." She says to me. I freeze, shit and yes! Shit cuz I haven't had sex with a virgin in a long time and yes cuz that bitch never touched her.

"But didn't you date that girl for a long time?" I ask. She nods against my neck. "Yeah, but we never did anything other then kiss and grope but that's about it." She says hiding her head in my neck.

I hug her to me and chuckle. "Don't be embarrassed, its not a big deal." I say quietly. She nods. "Yes it is, your experienced and I'm not. You can have anyone in school most of them with three times the experience I have." She says quietly.

I frown and pull away from her. "I'm glad you have no experience, not only for the obvious reason but… that if you let me I'll show you. And I do have experience but, I don't want anyone in school exept you. Even with zero the experience, I want you and only you Alice." I say into her ear.

Alice's head turns to look at me. My eyes burning in to hers she sends me a half smile and leans forward and captures my lips in hers. "I'll wait for you, don't doubt that." I say giving her a wink.

She chuckles at me and we stand up. "Want to go out? Lets go to the lodge and eat something?" I ask. She nods and I grin. "Awesome." I say to her before launching forward and grabing Alice and climbing with her up the stairs.

"What the hell? Put me down!" She laughs. I shake my head and keep walking up the stairs. "Damn girl your light! Its like carrying a sack of flour." I say and laugh when she squirms in my arms.

"My god, just let me carry you woman." I say laughing. She pouts and I grin and set her down. "Fine, my god." I say chuckling as I go up the steps. I hear Alice behind me laughing softly. I smirk. "Now I know why you wanted to walk, you just wanted to check out my ass." I say.

I hear Alice laugh, "Oh, like you don't check out mine every time I go up the stairs." She says. I grin. "I do, you have a very squeezable ass." I say chuckling. Alice is quiet and I'm about to look behind me when Alice squeezes my ass and I yelp and jump two steps.

I hear Alice's wind chime laugh echo through my house. "Your ass is very squeezable." She says in a serious face. I shudder, the feeling of her hand there.. God, not now. I clear my though and send her a smirk. "I'll have pay back." I say and walk up the hall to my room.

Once we get there Alice walks and jumps on my bed and sighs. "I love your bed! Its so soft and big!" she says. I laugh thinking of a bad 'that's what she said' moment but don't voice it.

I shuffle through the my desk looking for my wallet, I look at Alice. "Alice, can you check the night stand next to the bed for my wallet, I think its in the first drawer." I say setting down the papers on my desk and looking back to see Alice looking at my drawer.

I walk to her and see that she's looking at a picture of me and my dad. Behind us is a vast desert, "That was in phoenix." I say softly. She looks up. "Oh… what happened to you?" She asks. I look at the picture and grimace when I see that I have bruises and cuts even though im smiling.

This is after, Connor. That's why I keep it, for my father and for the reminder of Connor. "It was after a bad… bad experience." I say quietly before shutting the door slowly. "What happened?" Alice asks softly.

"Nothing, lets just go out and eat." I say normally. I stand from the bed and go to my closet and take out a jacket. "Alice, did you bring a jacket?" I ask. She's silent I look back and see her staring at me.

"Alice." I call out to her and her eyes snap to mine. "Yes?" She asks. I smile a little. "Did you bring a jacket?" I ask. She nods and I nod and put on my leather jacket and grab my ridding gloves. I walk to my bed and grab my cigarettes, phone and lighter and look over to Alice.

She's quiet and I sigh. "Alice I was fine, its nothing serious." I lie smoothly. She caught my bluff. "Liar." She says narrowing her eyes at me. I try to sizzle down the anger in me, why can't she just drop the damn subject?

"It's nothing Alice, nothing but a bad memory." I say to her grabbing my sunglasses from the night stand and putting them on. I take a cig out and light up right then and there, not caring if my room smells like smoke.

"Lets just go have a nice smooth diner, yes?" I ask around the cigarette. Alice stares at me and her expression looks… hurt, angry… I don't know. I run a hand through my hair tugging at it slighty and take the cig out of my mouth to look at her.

"What Alice?" I ask my voice showing a bit of my new bad mood. She frowns. "Don't shut me out." She says softly. "I'm not shutting you out Alice." I say in my normal voice. My anger and irritation not so present as it was a moment before.

She gets off the bed and walks to me and hugs me, I stiffen a bit before calming myself and hugging her back tightly. I keep the cig away from her body and whisper in her ear. "Alice, there are just some things that I know will cause you pain when you find them out. I don't want to hurt you Alice, I don't want you hurting. Especialy not over me." I say to her.

I hug her tightly as a memory of that night hits me

_~Flash back~_

_Ruff arms constrict around me, traping me against the warm body I had no urge to feel. "You're going to be mine, Isabella. I don't care how, but you will." He says angrily into my ear. I shudder in fear and try hard to knock him off his feet. "Why are you doing this? You're my friend, let me go." I say angrily as I fight against his to powerful arms._

_They constrict tighter and I find it hard to breathe and his whiskey stained breath hot on my neck. "I'm doing this because I'm in love with you, can't you see that! I fucking love you! Yet your in love with that bitch! That fucking Dyke! Your mine Isabella! Don't forget that!" He yells in my ear._

_He shifts and throws me against the ground and when I'm about to roll over he kicks my back to the ground and I hear a crunch. Pain spreads threw my ribs and chest. I cough trying to fight for breath and I hear his sickening laugh._

_I used to always think it was a nice friendly laugh, but now. Now I know what the laugh truly always was, evil. Evil and mocking, he's making that I can't fight against him. "What are you going to do now Isabella?" He has hissing my name. "Going to call mommy to save you?" He asks tauntingly with a sick laugh._

_I growl and launch towards him only to feel a punch connect with my cheek and send my head snaping to the side. "Your weak, Isabella. And I'm going to show you just how weak your really are before I kill you." He says stepping over me and spiting on my face._

_I throw a kick and land it on his gut but his hand grabs my leg and he kneels infront of me, my leg bent in a painful angle. "I'll show you how a real man is, after the first minute. You will be begging me for more." He says rubbing against me._

_Anger, fear and dread. Its all I can feel. I try to fight but he's stronger, I try to yell but he crushed my windpipe, I tried to run… but he beat me._

_~End flash back~_

My eyes snap open and I drop Alice before stepping back quickly. My breathing is labored and I can't think straight. Alice quicky looks up at me, her eyes wide in fear? Worry? Sadness?

"Bella? Bella, honey what's wrong?" She asks walking to me. I flinch back and shake my head. "I- I'm fine. Just… just give me a moment." I say my arms shaking in fear. I'm so cold… I'm freezing. I slouch against the wall and slide down until I'm sitting on the floor, I notice the cig in my hand and quickly take a drag.

I smoke the cig quickly, letting the warm smoke take my nerves away. I would prefer a blunt but I don't want Alice to see my crazy high. I shudder to myself and look up at Alice who looks torn and like she is about to cry.

I open my arm for her. "D-don't be afraid… I'm fine." I say my voice a bit dead. I can't help it, it happens after I have something like this. Alice stares at me and I motion for her to sit in between my legs, her back to my front.

She slowly walks to me and sits, careful not to touch me. After she is seated I wrap my arm around her stomach and pull her to me. I rest my head on her shoulder and I put out the cig before wraping my other arm around her.

"Your so warm, it makes me feel better. I always feel so cold." I say in that dead voice. I can't will myself to get my normal voice out. "Bella… honey, what happened? Why did you pull away form me like I was going to hurt you?" She asks quietly.

I snuggle my head in her neck a bit more and sigh. "I didn't want to tell you… but, I can't lie to you. Alice… do you know the true reason why I moved to forks with my father?" I ask. She shakes her head. "Well, two years ago I moved here to get treatment for my dad. But… that wasn't the main reason." I say.

"What do you mean?" Alice asks turning around and sitting next to me so I can see her face. "Three years ago… I… I was hanging out with my best friend Connor." I hiss the name. My shoulders square off automatically. "We were at a party and we had raided the houses liquor stash. Well, I had a girlfriend at that time -her name was Veronica- and well. I was with her at that party, I was having a blast." I say my lips tugging up a bit at the memory.

"I was craking jokes, hanging out with my best friend and my girlfriend. Things couldn't get better. Soon it was time to go home and well me and Connor didn't feel like going home, we wanted to drink and keep on having a good time." I say grimacing.

"Veronica had asked me to stay, saying she wanted to… you know. And that she had a bad feeling. I just guessing she wanted to fuck and brushed her off with a promise to be back later. She smiled content and we kissed and exchanged 'I love you's' before I walked down the street with Connor." I shudder a bit and break eye contact with Alice.

"Um, we walked to a building site around two blocks away downtown. No one would hear us laughing and what not if we were drunk. It was one of our usual hang outs so I just assumed it was safe. Well… that night. It wasn't." I say quietly.

"We were just hanging out, getting drunk with a bottle of whiskey. We started joking around and he had asked me about why I was gay. I told him I wasn't sure that I just knew so he offered we… have sex. I turned him down, I was 'in love' with Veronica… he got angry. He started yelling at me that I was his, that he was in love with me." I say I feel tears burning in my eyes and Alice takes my sunglasses and slides them off.

She cups my face and I close my eyes. "W-we fought, and I don't mean. Best friend fights. No… I mean we kicked each others asses but… he knew all my moves. He knew my weak points and he was strong. H-he said that I was his and that… I was weak. He used to call me by my full name, not liking my nickname… he said Isabella sounded classy." I remember with a shudder.

His whispers in my ear, his punches, his ruff hands on me, his lips on my neck, his hot unsettling breath, his anger… I shudder and lock my muscles keeping my eyes tightly shut. "He… he raped me… t-that's the reason we moved. I-I couldn't be there. It-t held to many b-bad memory's." I say softy.

The room is quiet and I don't want to look but I feel the need too so I open my eyes to see Alice's rimed red hazel eyes. Filled with tears, I cup her cheek gently. "Don't cry, I'm fine. I'm fine." I chant. I don't know who I'm trying to convince. Her or myself.

Alice stays still and I pull her to me and hug her. I sit her on my lap and rock both of us forward and back, I can't contain a sob that leaves me and Alice hugs me and whispers sweet nothings into my ear.

"Shhh, your ok. I'm here and your alright. He's gone, he can't hurt you." She says to me. I nod and after a moment I relax and Alice cups my face. "Bella… is he… please tell me he's in jail." She asks looking at my eyes.

I smirk bitterly. "Yeah, twenty six years and a chance at probation for rape and attempt of murder. In my opinion they should have just let me kill him." I say quietly. Alice sighs and hugs me tightly. "No, don't think that. Please… don't think that." She says quietly, her voice quivering.

I sigh but nod and hug her to me. "Thank you." I say quietly to her my eyes stinging with tears. "Why?" She asks me. "Thank you for not thinking it was my fault, that I deserved it." I say quietly, my tears falling but I can't look at her.

Alice gasps. "How- how could that be your fault Bella, it wasn't. It was his, it was his fault. No one deserves that." She says hugging me. I shake my head. "Maybe she was right, ya know? Maybe I did deserve it." I say quietly.

"Bella." Alice says in a hard tone. I look up at her slowly and her eyes burn in to mine, she's angry. "Who do you think was right?" She asks. "Veronica, she… she said I deserved it. Like I deserved everything bad that was happening to me. That it was my fault my mother got killed, my fault that I got raped and my fault that Connor snapped." I say quietly.

"Alice… maybe it is all my fault. Maybe I just got my punishment before I did the crime… if there is a God, why does he hate me so much?" I ask falling to tears. "If there is a God why did he leave me here, without a family?" I ask crying my eyes out.

I hate crying, and I hate crying even more in front of Alice. She just hugs me and whispers sweet nothings into my ear but I keep crying and talking. "People always say God has… has something.. planned for you… b-but w-why would he… plan this for me… tha-that's w-why I… I lost h-hope that he w-would save me-e." I say in between sobs and hiccups.

Alice finally places a hand over my mouth. "Shhh, Bella. Don't, baby. Please don't lose hope, that's the last thing you should ever lose. Baby, please. Don't cry, I'm here. I'm here and I won't leave. It wasn't your fault, nothing was ever your fault Bella. Nothing was." She says hugging me so tightly I love it.

I need it, I feel like I'm falling apart and Alice…. She's the only thing keeping me together. I cry for a long time and Alice just sits with me, whispering things to me and trying to make me feel better.

After a while Alice is sitting, her back against the wall and my head in her lap while she runs a hand through my hair. My tears long have stopped and now I'm just trying to get out of my haze.

Alice speaks softly. "I'm sorry." She says. I frown and turn on my back to look at her. "For?" I ask horsely. She sends me a small smile. "You didn't want to tell me and I made you. I'm sorry." She says quietly her eyes filling with tears.

I shake my head. "I needed to tell you, I was planning on telling you soon. You just gave me the guts to do it. Those tears…. They were long over due. Don't apologize, Alice. It kills me." I say cupping her face and looking in her eyes.

She nods and manages to smile through the tears before I go serious. "It kills me that I can't say the 'L' word. Because… I feel so safe with you Alice, its so scary but… it's a good fear. And maybe its to early but… you have my heart Alice. You've had it all along, since day one. And you don't have to say it back, I just… I needed to tell you." I say before taking a breath.

I can't say the 'L' word… it holds only emptiness, hurt and lies for me. But, I will tell her in my own way. "You have my heart Mary Alice Brandon Cullen and I don't think I want it back. So, instead of asking you to say it back… I'm begging you to keep it safe. Its too fragile to resist another break Alice. So… can you keep it safe for me?" I ask quietly looking up into her eyes.

Her face is shocked but, there's so much warmth in her eyes. So much warmth it over whelms me. She nods a few times. "Yes, Bella. I'll keep it safe for you. As long as you take mine and protect it from ever getting hurt." She says to me.

I giver her a tired smile. "I'll keep it safe Alice, I'll keep you safe." I say bringing her head down to mine to give her a long tender kiss. It's a kiss to show her that I mean it when I tell her she has my heart and that I will keep hers safe.

Alice will stay, she won't go away. I thought she was a flashlight… no, she's my moon… no. She's my sun, she keeps me warm and safe. She keeps the shadows away and protects me.

"I care for you so much." I say to her in between sweet tender kisses. "As I for you." Alice reply's and after I break the kiss I hug her and we sit for a while. After a moment her stomach growls and I laugh softly.

"Sorry." She says and I laugh again. "No worry's, beautiful. I'm hungry too." I say standing up and helping her up. Once she is up and standing I sigh happily. "Where do you want to eat?" I ask grabbing my keys from the bed and walking out of the room with Alice next to me.

She hm's in concentration before sighing. "The lodge, we can get a quiet booth and just bask in our company." She syas. I laugh softly at her and nod. "Fine by me, tesoro." I say. She stops and looks at me. "What's that mean?" She asks.

I send her a small smile, I was hoping she wouldn't ask. "Its Italian for Darling." I say giving her a small smile. She nods and sends me a smile. "By the way you can call me darling in English. I won't freak out, baby." She says with a grin.

I nod. "I like that pet name, now all you need are around five more and you can be even Volkova." I say chuckling. She sticks her tongue out at me and I grin before snapping my teeth an inch away from it. "Hide it or I'll bite it." I joke. She hides it and I grin. "Good Tinkerbell." I say and laugh at her shocked face.

"I do not look like Tinkerbell!" She says stomping her feet. I laugh loudly remembering her doing that in a movie. "Sure you don't. hahahahaha, stop doing that. Hahaha I can't breathe." I say when she starts tickling me.

She keeps tickling me. "Call me baby and I'll stop." She says. I laugh and try to form the word but can't because of my laughing. "Hahahaha B-ba hahahaha Baby! Baby please stop. I can't breathe, baby." I say and she stops tickling me. I try to catch my breath and feel her chuckle against my neck. "I really like when you call me that." She says against my neck.

I nod still trying to catch my breath. "Me… too." I say and hmm, when she kisses my neck. "I really like when you call me that." I say and she chuckles silently and kisses my neck with an open mouth kiss.

"Baby… I love you." Alice says against my neck. I smile and shudder. "As I do you." I say before giving her a kiss on the lips and walking out of the house. I walk to my garage with Alice behind me and I open the door and to to the helmet rack's.

"Pick out your favorite and take it with you to your house. You never know when I'll take you out with this again." I say to her. She nods and picks the deep red one and I grin when it matches mine. I point to the wall next to it. "Put on one of my jackets." I say to her. She smiles widely and grabs one.

I straddle my motorcycle and she climbs on after me and hods me tightly. I grin and slide down my shield and turn on the bike. I steer forward a bit and after closing the door with the beeper I drive out at a comfortable pace. On the speed limit for once and just bask on the feeling of her holding onto me and her sweet wind chime laugh when I start singing at full blast. "Not gonna get us."

She laughs at me and so do I and we reach the lodge and I park out front. She slides of and I slide of and once I take off my helmet Alice kisses me. I hug her to me and kiss her back just basking in the feeling.

"Lets go." I say against her lips and she pulls away and I stow away our helmet at the coat check and we go to a small booth in the corner and talk the whole night away.

**A/N: Alice pov, how will the Cullen's react to Alice telling them Bella is in love with her?**


	24. Chapter 24

_**A/N: How many of you guessed what happened with Connor before I confirmed it? Honest truth! REVIEW! I answered the-poetry-of-ink's dare. Read and review! Lemon!**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!... I do love the song "I didn't want to do it." by Julia Volkova! I'm hooked!**_

_**Ch.24**_

_**Apov.**_

All I can think off since I got home is…

She loves me, she loves me, she loves me, she loves me, she loves me, she was raped, I want to kill that ass hole Connor for touching her, I want to kill Veronica for telling her those things, I love her, she loves me, I won't hurt her, she won't hurt me.

In other words… my mind was a wreck so it didn't surprise me when my siblings picked up on my zoned out state. I was laying on my bed when someone knocks my door and I sigh, I had a feeling this would happen.

"Come in." I say sitting up a bit on my bed. The door opens to show Emmett, Edward, Rose and Jazz all walking in and the later closing the door behind him. I raise an eyebrow. "What?" I ask. The look at me with narrowed eyes. "Why did you get home so late last night? And why have you been zoned out all day?" Rosalie asks.

I frown and shrug. "I was with Bella and right now before you entered I was thinking of her so. There is your answer." I say and rest my head back on my pillow and look at them waiting for them to respond.

I have no will to fight, I'm to blissed out on Bella. She loves me, she loves me! ME! I can't fight the grin that comes over my lips when I think of her and Edward spots it. "See, you just did it again!" He says. I chuckle. "I'm happy, sue me. And why do you care? You don't see me buzzing on Rose and Em or even you and Jazz so why are you bugging me?" I ask.

There quiet and I feel my temper rise and stand up. "Face it, you don't trust me! What? Only you for can be happy and I have to stay alone for the rest of my life?" I ask. Rose rolls her eyes. "Of course not, we would just prefer if that person wasn't Bella." She says.

I snap. "It's not your decision! It's mine! It's my relationship and my love life! You have no right to opinion! You don't see me bugging about how many nights I hear you and Em getting it on!" I say angrily to her.

Her mouth falls open in shock before her eyes go hard. "She's a bad influence on you. Just look now! Your yelling at us, you never yell." She says. "Well, maybe its because my siblings don't know when to give it a break! I thought you were over judging Bella but apparently not." I say glaing at them.

Jazz speaks now. "Alice, its not that we're judging Bella. We just see things that you don't." He says in a calm voice. "You are! Your not giving her a chance! Your not giving us a chanse! Can you guys even see how much this hurts me? Don't you guys even care?" I ask a traitor tear falls and I brush it away furiously.

"Of course we do Ali, we just don't want her to hurt you." Emmett says looking at me sadly. I let out a bitter laugh. "Really? Because right now the only person hurting me are my siblings. Bella doesn't even have a family, yet she understand perfectly the consept! She even mentioned it a few nights ago, that for a family you guys don't support me the way your supposed too." I say more tears falling.

Edward steps forward to give me a hug and I push him away. "Don't, just… just leave me alone. I was so fucking happy before you guys even showed up in my room." I say sadly, missing the feeling of my Bella high. There all quiet and don't move. I sigh and grab my shoes from the floor and put them on and I hear Rosalie sigh.

"Why are you putting on shoes?" She asks. "If you won't leave, I will." I say angrily sliping them on. "And were do you think your going?" Emmett says. I glare at my four siblings. "To somewhere I'm accepted, I'm gong to Bella's." I say pushing past them and out my door. I stomp down the stairs hearing there foot steps behind me.

I growl. "Now you leave." I mutter acidly as I reach the last steps only to feel a hand on my arm. "Alice, we just don't want her to hurt you." Edward says. I snap and pull my hand away and say exasperatedly to them. "She love's me! And I love her. Why can you just accept that?" I ask them.

There all freeze in silence and Rosalie breaks it. "How do you know she loves you? And how do you know she means it?" she asks. I smirk bitterly at her. "She told me, yesterday. And I know she means it because she told me something about herself that I could tell she had never said to anyone." I say looking at them.

"People like you are the reason she is so guarded. And yesterday…" I trail off with a bit off pain in my voice and I look at Rosalie's blue eyes. "People like her can't love. Alice! She's just going to hurt you." She says.

I wince. "She's not Royce!" I yell at her. Rosalie's face contorts in pain and I regret it instantly. But, I won't take it back. Their hurting me, why should I be the one to apologize? "You and her have more in common then you think. You would realize that if you just gave a chance to get to know her." I say softly to her.

Rosalie glares at me. "What can Bella have in common with me?" She asks raising her chin. I chuckle sadly at her and look in her eyes. "She has to trust you enough to tell you that." I say and grab one of Bella's jackets and walk out to the dark day. "Tell mom and dad I'll be home late." I call out before I continue to walk.

"Shes just going to hurt you Alice! She can't be trusted!" Rosalie calls out to me. "Neither can my family." I call back to her and storm down the drive way crying silently for a few minutes. After a moment I stop and wipe my tears.

I'm being stupid, I did nothing wrong. They did, they should be happy for me. But their not. They are hurting me and they don't even have it in them to apologize. How can my siblings do this to me? I shake my head and continue to walk. I can think straight, I need Bella.

After around ten minutes I reach Bella's house and ring the door bell. I stand there on the porch and after a moment I hear foot steps on the stairs. I hear a thump and then giggles… since when does Bella giggle?

I shrug it off and wait and I hear a few more foot steps until the mail slot opens a bit. "Password." Her voice says. I crack a smile. "Bella, its me." I say crouching down to look in the mail slot.

I see her eyes and smile. "Silly, open the door." I say and then theres a laugh. "Eye, eye Capitan." She says and I hear the lock click. "Bella what is up with you?" I ask when I see her standing behind the door with her head down. Her head looks up slowly. "Nothing." She says with a grin and I frown and look over her again.

Her hair is ok, her clothes are a little wrinkled like she slept in them and her eyes are…red. "Your high." I say to her. She bites her lip. "Not at all." She says and I raise an eyebrow at her and she giggles. "Alright… maybe a little?" She says.

I sigh and shake my head and take off my jacket and hug her. "Why do you do this to yourself?" I ask. I feel her relax in to my arms and her chin rest on the top of my head. "Are you mad at me?" She asks.

I sigh. "Depends on why you did it." I say walking with her to the kitchen. She needs something to eat. "I couldn't sleep last night, I kept having… flashbacks and I was out of my panic attack pills and all I had was weed left over from the party last month." She says.

I sigh and frown. "It's alright I guess, just… I wish you would stop using drugs, I haven't in a long time, the beach was the last time that I even touched weed in a long time." I say to her. She nods and her head snaps up. "Shit." She says. I frown and turn around. "What?" I ask.

She looks at me with wide eyes and runs out of the kitchen stumbling a bit before running up the stairs I follow quickly behind her and once we reach her room she opens the door and her room is filled with smoke, I scrunch my nose at the weed smell to it.

I mean, it smells good but its too consentrated. I quickly run to her windows and her balcony doors and turn to look at her in the bathroom working with something. "Bella what are you… you have a hot tub in your bathroom?" I ask.

She turns on her heels and nods before cursing under her breath and pressing buttons. "Shit." She says again as the water starts to spill. "Can you take the plug out of that hole at the end of the room." She says frantically still pressing buttons. I look around and see a black clog in a corner of the room and walk over to it and pull it out. The water that was collecting over it falls into the drain.

I hear more cursing and look behind me to see Bella jumping in to the hot tub with clothtes on. She goes under water and after a minute comes back out with a grin on her face. "Done." She says with a smug edge like a child.

I chuckle and walk over to her and laugh. "What exactly happened?" I ask. She chuckles. "I was planning on taking a hot tub bath so I started filling up and decided I should smoke a bowl or three while I waited for it to fill up." She says sounding more like herself. I laugh softly at her and lean on my tip toes and kiss her lips chastly, licking a few water drops from her lips.

She grins when I pull away her eyes a bit glazed before they are switched with mischief. I frown and when I finaly understand its to late. Her arm is around my waist and I'm half way over the hot tub. I laugh. "Wait! My phone is in my poket." I say. I hear her chuckle before her warm and slightly wet hand slides from my waist to my as and she chuckles and squeezes my butt.

I yelp and she laughs softly. "Not in this pocket…. What about this one?" She says in my ear as she slowly drags her hand over to my other cheek were my phone is. I shudder at the feeling of her hand on my ass. "Hmmm." I hear her say as she slides her hand in to my poket and clutching the phone and squeezing my ass again.

I squirm and I hear her chuckle once more before she removes the hand with the phone in it and she lifts it up and pulls me to her. My legs fall in the water and I'm standing in the hot tub. Bella lets me go and walks to the edge were there is a small table there far away enough not to get splashed and she chuckles when she turns around.

I glare at her, and she grins wider before sitting on the bult seats and I stand there infront of her and she grins wider. "As much as I love to see you standing in front of me with that face, there is no use being pissed at me. Your already wet." She says and her grin grows a bit more.

I roll my eyes at her and take off my jacket before sitting on the seats. She pushes a buttons and the lights turn off and I can see the jets have lights in them changing the waters color.

She chuckles and takes of her shoes and throws them out of the hot tub. I copy her and she keeps chuckling all the while looking at me. She looks down at herself and frowns. "Wer'e going to ruin our clothes if we stay like this." She says.

I raise an eyebrow at her and she looks at me quickly and shakes her head. "I didn't mean, I meant… shit. Um just stay in your underwear. Its like a bikini, I find no difference." She says.

I frown for a moment before grinning at the idea of Bella in only a bra and underwaer. I shrug and turn around to give her a bit of privacy and take of my jeans first. I look over my shoulder to see her back to me. I pull of my heavy jeans and grin when I have my lacy black peace underwear.

I pull them off and throw them out of the hot tub to see Bella do the same. There's a hint of color on her cheeks and she turns her back to me before reaching for the hem of her shirt. I know I shouldn't be looking at her but I can't pull my gaze away.

Her shirt lifts a bit to show that on the corner of her lower back is a tattoo of a rose with thorns on the stem and… rain or something falling on it. Her shirt lifts more and theres a scar on her back but I continue to look and se her strong muscular back flex as she puls the shirt over her shoulders and there are three other tattoos on her shoulders.

On the left is the one about the blood wings with the name Charlie at the bottom of it I hadn't noticed. In the center it looks like… an angel and a devil girl back to back and on the right shoulder is a crecent moon with ying and yang in the middle of it.

She shakes her hair out and the tattoos are covered. I turn my back to her my cheeks warm. I take of my shirt quickly and when I turn around I see her looking at me. I knit my eyebrows together and she looks me down completely.

I duck my head feeling out of place shy. "I… I know I'm not m-" I'm cut of my Bella lifting my head and kissing me. I kiss her back and when she pulls away my head is a bit fuzzy. "Your beautiful, never doubt that." She says seriously. I nod and mumble a 'you too' before she kisses me again and pulls me down to her lap.

I shudder a bit at the warm water and the feeling of her smooth legs on mine. I kiss her and she pulls away with a shuddered breath. "I think that's enough for myself control." She says before slidding out from under me and sitting across from me on the hot tub.

"So… um, what brought you here? Not that I'm complaining I just though you wanted to spend some time with your family." She says to me. I sigh and lean my head back and relish in the warmth of the water and answer her. "My siblings are being a problem again." I say to her.

Shes quiet and then sighs. "A- Are you sure they aren't right? I'm not worth it Alice… trust me, I'm not worth it." She says and my eyes snap open and I lift my head to look in her eyes.

She's looking at the water a frown playing on her lips. "Hey." I say softly. She looks at the water and sighs. "I'm not worth it, Alice. You have a family that loves you very much, yet… your risking it for me. I'm not worth it, do you know how much I would pay to have a family. I would kill for it." She says.

I lean forward and touch her hand under the water. "Bella, its just sibling fights. I'm pissed now but I don't hate them. I can never hate them but, I don't think its fair to you that they keep judging without giving you a chance." I say to her.

She shakes her head. "Im' not worth a chance, Alice. I;m not worth anything. When I die, it will most likely be of nothing and for nothing. My money will just go to some guy who isint even my blood and my industry will close. My family will die with me and there is no one out there who will share it with me." She says looking at the water.

I shake my head and say quietly. "I will, I'll share if with you if you just give us the chance to grow Bella. We love each other, I know how much that word has hurt you in the past but not all love hurts. I'll show you that, just give me the chance to show you." I say to her.

She looks at me, her eyes black in the soft glow of light from the jets. She thinks for a moment before nodding. "Fine, I won't doubt you or myself anymore. I'll… I'll love you." She says looking in my eyes.

I grin widely and she mimics it and I hug her the water splashing a little because I launched myself at her. She starts slidding down and I hold my breath when my head goes under the surface and she is under me under water.

I send her smile and lean forward and kiss her lips. She kisses me back and then she lets go of all her air and stays flat on the ground. I frown at her and lean forward and kiss her but blow air in her mouth. Is she stupid? Does she want to drown?

Bella grins and hugs me to her before I pull away needing air. I push away from her and my head breaks the surface and I gasp for air and Bella slowly gets out of the water and snikers at me.

"I love that you tried to save me but I can go a long time without air under water." She says to me. I raise an eyebrow and look at her. "That so?" I ask. She nods. "Around three maybe four minutes." She says.

I grin. "That's why you're a good kisser." I state and she grins wider. "So I'm a good kisser?" Bella asks in a seductive voice. I smile and nod. "Very much so." I say. She goes to kiss me and I climb the steps to get out slowly before sliping out of the water and standing on the tile floor.

Bella look at me and sighs. "Tease." She says. "Player." I say and she hold sher hands up in surrender. "My god, must you always go for the kill?" She ask jokingly. I shrug. "Since when do you believe in god?" I ask. She shrugs. "I don't." She says.

I nod once and purse my lips. "I do." I say to her. She frowns. "Why is that?" she asks. I shrug and look in her eyes. "How can there not be a god if I have had such a good life?" I ask.

She nods once. "I still don't believe that he's real but if there is one… at least he is kind to you." She says with a shrug getting out of the water. I go to a little rack and take out two towels and throw one at her. She grabs it and dries of as I do I.

"I can't see anything." I state looking around for a light switch. I hear bella's soft laugh and then the lights turn on. I turn around to see Bella sitting on the counter with the light switch next to her.

"I don't know your house." I say and discretely check out her flat toned stomach and see a big scar there, life if something had scraped againt the skin and left a new shiny layer. I don't care, she's still hot as hell and I look up her body slowly and super slowly when I reach her breast. I grin to myself when I see Bella checking me out again. "Like what you see?" I quote her.

She gulps and breaks her eye contact to look in my eyes. "You have no idea." She says before putting the towel on her head and leaning against the wall. I chuckle and walk over to her and pull the towel of her face. "If it makes you feel any better you look incredibly sexy." I say lowly to her.

She closes her eyes and I see her shudder a bit before letting out a breath. "I'll go get you some clothes you can borrow." She says and hops off the counter and walks out of the bathroom.

I frown, did I say something wrong? I sigh and dry off more when Bella walks in a while after already dressed in sweets and a wife beater. She holds it up for me to see and places it on the counter.

It's a baggy t shirt and some pajama bottoms… with clowns on them. I shudder and look at Bella. "I can't wear that." I say to her seriously. She frowns. "Why not?" she asks scaning the clothes. I look at the pants again and shudder. "Clowns freak me out." I state.

She laughs at me and stops when she sees I'm serious. She tries to hide her giggles and nods and walks out and shuffles before bringing me plain black pajama bottoms. "Get dressed, I'll order a pizza, I have no food in this house." She says placing the clothes there before quickly walking out of the bathroom.

I shake my head at her and get dressed using some spray on deodorant and some perfume and sliping on the underwear she also gave me and I finish up and walk down the stairs quietly.

"Bella?" I aks. Theres quiet, "In the living room." She calls to me. I make my way there when I see it I scream and yelp. Bella is wearing a fucking clown mask. "What the fuck?" I yell at her stepping away from her.

She shrugs and turn son the radio. "I'm helping you get over your fear of clowns." And fucking clowns the song from tatu comes on. She starts singing along and dancing in her clown mask. I shudder but after a moment she starts doing this stupid dance that makes me crack up.

_**"Can you see?**_

_**Can you see?**_

_**See me here in the air**_

_**Not holding on to anywhere**_

_**But holding on so beware**_

_**I have secrets I won't share**_

_**See me here pushing you**_

_**If I then deny I do**_

_**Contemplate or wish away**_

_**If I ask you not to stay**_

_**Clowns that only let you know**_

_**Where you let your senses go**_

_**Clowns all around you**_

_**It's a cross I need to bear**_

_**All this black and cruel despair**_

_**This is an emergency**_

_**Don't you hide your eyes from me**_

_**Open them and see me now"**_

She finishes her stupid little clown dance and I just laugh at her, she has a great singing voice but her obsession with tatu songs at the most random moments is crazy. She takes of her mask and plops down next to me. "So, are you afraid of clowns still?" She asks whipping imaginary sweat off her forehead.

I nod ."Yeah, they freak me out. But my little clown doesn't." I say and snuggle my head in her neck. She chuckles. "I'll be darned, she pixie called me little." She says and I laugh at her. I sigh happily. "Thanks for that, I think I got over it a little. I think next time I see a clown I will just think of your dance." I say with a chuckle.

A laugh rumbles in her chest. "That was primoraly the plan." She says before poping out a different mask and I jump and give a little shove to her hand. "Shit." I mumble softly and Bella laughs.

"Don't worry, you'll get over it. Rome wasn't built in a day… and if it was. Then fuck those crazy Aliens." She says and I laugh at her craziness. "You sure your not high still?" I ask. She shakes her head. "Nah, I'm good. Hungry as fuck thou." She says.

I chuckle and kiss her cheek. "Your adorable." I say to her. She grins at me. "And so are you." She says pinching my nose before droping her hand. I look in her warm brown black eyes that I swear are smoldering.

"I really do love you." I say to her. A smile tugs on her lips. "And I love you." She says looking in my eyes. "Now, now I love you, their not gonna get us. Their not gonna get us." I sing and she chuckles and kisses me chastly.

"Your fucking adorable." She says laughing softly and I stick my tongue out at her before remembering last time and quickly hiding it away but its to late she kisses me and softly bites my lip.

"Bella." I say softly kissing her back. She kisses me gently and fuck I don't want gentle. I don't want to pull away anymore. She's hot and mine. What the fuck is wrong with me? I try to make the kiss deeper but Bella pulls away and looks in my eyes for a moment before touching her lips back to mine.

Again I try to deepen the kiss only to have her pull back and say. "Alice…" in a warning tone. Before bringing her lips back to mine I sigh and place my hands on her hips and bring her down to me before she tenses and pulls away both arms on either side of my head and her body in a push up faze.

"Behave, Alice. We had this talk yesterday." She says looking at me seriously. I sigh. "I changed my mind." I state. She lift an eyebrow. "Sure you did." She says sarcastically and brings herself down and kisses my lips once more.

This time she allows me to deepen the kiss but when I try to pull some of her weight on me she pulls away. "Alice, don't make me say no to you." She says against my lips before kissing me again.

I break away. "Then don't." I say before connecting our lips once again. I hear her wimper against my lips and I grin and knot a hand in her hair and bring my leg up to rub my thigh on hers and I feel her shudder.

I kiss her ruffly, hungry for more. She always taste like mint for some reason and I love it. I suck her tongue into my mouth and we fight for dominance I win and I rub my tongue on her's as sensually as I can.

I run my free hand down her back and I feel her arms slump and give before she catches herself. I smile internally at my victory and happy to see her knee is resting right in between my legs.

I kiss her for a minute before bringing her closer and her knee touching me there and I shudder and moan into her mouth. Bella shudders in return and she moans when I rub my center on her thigh. "Alice…" She whimpers out. I break away from her lips and go to her neck.

She shudders above me before pushing her leg up, putting pressure on my clit. I moan and rub against her agrain this time we both moan into each others mouths. One of Bella's arms go around my waist and pull's me closer and grinds against me and I shudder.

"Bella.." I moan out and I feel Bella grind on me again before attacking my neck and lips. I grin a bit, her hunger. I love it, I love that deep raw hunger for me. "Alice… please." Bella rasps out grinding on me. I shudder in pleasure and arch my back. Before slumping back and cupping Bella's breast in my hand.

She moans and I start to kneel it before she whimpers into my neck, pressing sloppy kisses there. "Fuck." She moans into my neck when I grind against her. "Bella.." I say and as if she knew what I wanted her hand cups my breast and she starts massaging it expertly and she moans. "Shit… no bra." She mutters and kisses my neck and bites and licks and I moan.

Her hand leaves my breast and I whimper and I hear her chuckle. "Now, now. I'm not stopping." She says in my ear seductively before I feel her hand on my hip under my shirt. Her hand causes gosse bumps to flash through my skin and she slides her hand up and when she's under my breast she runs a thumb under it grazing my breast.

I shudder. "Bella, don't tease me." I say breathlessly. I feel Bella kiss under my chin and her hand slowly cups my breast and she sighs. "So soft." She mumbles and starts to massage it running her thumb over my nipple making me moan.

"Alice… God Alice…" She moans grinding on me and massaging my breast. After a few more minutes of just grinding on each other and me massaging her breast and she mine I feel a flame lick on my abdomen and spread all threw my abdomen and core. "Fuck." I moan and Bella grinds harder on me.

I moan. "Bella… so close… baby, don't stop." I manage to get out. This seems to spur her on because she starts grinding on me and her hand that was on my breast trails down I whimper but can manage to speak my jaw and legs tingling.

She trails her hand down my body until her hand is over my crotch on top of my clothes on my clit. "Come on, baby. Cum for me." She says in my ear before putting pressure on her finger on me and rubbing in circles. I'm right on the edge when she lifts her knee and pushes against my center that I cum.

My orgasm washing through me in waves making me show out Bella's name. I hear Bella moan my name and slumping on me. I imagine she came as well. After my orgasm dies down I start trying to even out my breath and I hear when Bella trys to control her breathing. "I love you." She rasps out.

I feel my grin shift into a wide smile and I kiss her head. "I love you too." I say and I feel her hug me closer before she shifts so that she is laying on the couch and me on top of her. She snuggles in to my neck. "For the record this isn't our first time." She says. I chuckle. "Why not?" I ask.

I hear her laugh softly. "Our first time trust me, I'll make you cum more then once." She says in my ear. I grin. "Is that a promise?" I ask. "Oh, you know it is." She says in my ear before kissing behind it and hugging me to her.

I grin and my eyes start to droop and soon enough I fall asleep in Bella's arms.

**A/N: Well? How did you guys like the lemon? Many too come cuz now Alice is not being a prude. Yei oh, and I do accept dares. REVIEW AND I WILL UPDATE TONIGHT**


	25. Chapter 25

_**A/N: Short chapter, just something to lighten the thick mood.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT… but I am going to have a girls night tomorrow.**_

_**Ch.25**_

_**Apov**_

Bella is coming over for diner tonight!... And I have no idea how to react. Last night she wasn't kidding when she said she has zero food in her house. Its empty, nothing at all except for monster, Mikes hard lemonade, water and a vine of grapes.

She had ordered pizza after we woke up from our dry hump session which is what Bella proudly called it. You could feel the bliss coming out of Bella and me while we ate pizza while watching The Big Bang Theory where she pronounced that Sheldon looks like Edward and penny would be Rosalie.

That comment had made me laugh so much that when I got home and saw Edward and Rosalie in the living room I bursted out laughing. I was still angry at them but Bella had soothed me telling me to not fight with them and if they didn't like her it wasn't a big deal.

Unhappily I complied… but that also could have been because she was kissing my neck and her hand was on my breast when she said this in the car. Anyway I told her to come over today to hang out, it was time she met my parents in a nice terms instead of that unexpected little freak out and our date.

Besides we were spending so much time at her house I was getting a bit home sick. And I bet Bella felt sick of her house seeing as everything brought back memories or so she said. I was planning on helping mom with cooking when I realized… I have freaking no idea how to cook.

I mean, I know how to cook simple things like… cerial… oatmeal… caned soup… Chef Boyardee and mac and cheese. And when I presented this issue with my mother well, she demanded I learn.

Not kidding… she made me sit in the kitchen while she cooked and I took notes. After half an hour I was pretty sure I knew how to make half the things she told me. But… when she put me to work… I burned the water.

I don't know how! But I did! Emmett found that hilarious until I reminded him abut the poptart incident including the microwave and he shut up. Mom had just suppressed a smile and told me to head up to my room and just call Bella over so… that's what I did.

Just then the doorbell rings and my head snaps up. I walk out of my room quickly trying to make it but freeze in my tracks when I see Rosalie open the door. I decide to see how the act when I'm not around and hide back in the corner and listen to them interact.

"Hello, Rosalie." Bella's soft voice says. There's quiet before she sighs. "Bella, come on in. Alice is… somewhere." She says a bit coldly before I hear the door click. "Oh, um… so, how are you?" Bella asks.

I look around the corner to see Bella and Rosalie face to face neither of them looking at me but staring at each other in a stare down to the death. "Perfect, you?" Rose asks in her bitchy tone.

I see Bella smirk a bit but her eyes don't waver. "I'm doing pretty good." She says. Rosalie frowns. "Whats with the smirk?" She asks. Bella smirks a bit more prominent and says. "I know you don't like me, what's up with the charade? Even in school all I am to you is a way to be popular. That's the only reason any of you stuck around me that first couple of weeks and now that you are you think you can out throw me?" She asks in a strangely uncaring tone.

"Well, Rosie. I hate to break it to you but I don't really care for popularity. Its just something that came with my money and looks. I could care less if I were popular or an outcast. You do, you seem like the type to thrive on it. Then by all means take my throne just know one thing." She says steping closer to her.

"Any of you make Alice cry for some stupid reason such as you not accepting me ever again and I will forget that I love that girl and crush your rep until its nothing. Until your nothing but a joke." She says in a deep menacing tone.

I raise an eyebrow, is all of this true? Was that my siblings edge the whole time, popularity? I shake my head and wait for Rosalies response. "How the hell dare you come into my house and treathen me? God, if it werent for Alice-" Bella cuts her off.

"What? You would act worse? But then again, you love causing pain on your sister don't you? I bet you get off on that, your sick. What? Your going to wait for your sister to come down here and be rude to me then? For what, just to get off on it later?" She says with an edge.

My eyes are wide, the hell? Do these people I think I know so well actually act like this when I'm not around? Before I can process it theres a slapping sound and my eyes are wide when I see a grinning Bella holding her cheek.

"Struck a nerv?" She asks innocently and Rosalie is positively vibrating with fury. "We never intended on using you for popularity nor do we wish intentionally to hurt Alice! We just don't like the idea of Alice with you for the simple reason that her last girlfriend used to cheat on her constantly." Rose says to Bella.

Bella's grin fades in to one of counfusion. "Her girlfriend from Chicago? She cheated on Alice?" She asks in shock. Shit, I forgot to mention that to her. Rose stops and nods and Bella's face goes from one of shock to anger. "How can…. Who the hell would ever cheat on Alice? I mean… I've never cheated in a relationship, Rosalie. I have no wish nor desire to be with anyone other then Alice." She says to her.

Rosalie looks at her for a moment before sighing. "Fine, lets just call it quits. I'm sick of seeing Alice so hurt because of us but… she did say something that bothered me a bit yesterday." She says and I freeze.

Shit, I'm so screwed. Bella frowns and raises an eyebrow, her stance looking guarded. "What would that be?" She asks. Rose observes her for a moment. "That we have something in common." She says and I sigh in relief.

For a moment I thought she would make something up. Bella's stance relaxes and I shake my head sadly if the only knew. "Maybe its our temper." Bella says with a grin and I actually hear Rosalie scoff softly.

Bella's eyebrows furrow and her grin gets wide. "I know what it is." She says snapping her fingers. "What?" Rose asks amused by Bella. "We're both hot as hell." She says with a grin and they both laugh before she chuckles. "Alright, I guess I'll go find Alice. Oh, wait. She's right over there. Alice, now come out from your hiding spot your only fooling Rose." She calls over to me.

I freeze for a moment before laughing at her and walking out of my hiding spot. "How did you know I was there?" I ask. She winks at me. "I saw you since I stepped in the door. It also doesn't help that you have that yellow shirt on." She says looking at my eyes.

I grin and practically fly down the stairs to her arms. She hugs me to her and kisses the top of my head. "Hello, beautiful. How has your day gone so far?" She asks. I shrug. "Strangely non-dramatic." I say and my eyes shift to Rose who is looking at the ground.

"You heard everything?" She asks her blue eyes looking at me. I nod and she grimaces before frowning. "Then why didn't you step up when she started insulting me?" She asks and I shrug. "You're a big girl and remind me of that. Don't you ever slap Bella again or I will cut up all your clothes and burn them." I say seriously to her before turning around in Bella's arms to kiss her cheek.

It was a bit red. "Incredible, not even in my house for five full minutes and already she has been hit." I mutter cupping her cheek. She winks at me. "Oh, so you prefer hitting me then someone else doing it." She asks.

I grin at her. "When I do it its supposed to be erotic, when my sister does it… its supposed to piss you off." I say fighting my smile. Rosalie's small 'ew' breaks the silence and Bella and I start laughing.

I cherish the sound of all three of us laughing, everything had been so tense in a very long time that that I relished this moment. After our laughter quieted down Rose speaks. "I'm not sorry for hitting you but I am sorry for accusing you without cause to do so. We are just very protective of your short person." Rose says smiling at me.

I scowl and grin when I remember Bella's joke long ago. "I'm not short, I'm fun sized!" I say. A booming laugh from behind me makes me jump. "What is that? Some kind of kinky lesbian thing?" Emmett asks gofily walking down the stairs grinning.

He smiles his dimple grin and looks to Bella and grins wider. "Bella, I'm going to kick your ass at Call of Duty later." He says to her and Bella chuckles. "That's definately not going to happen." She says placing an arm around my waist.

Just then my other two siblings walk down the stairs hand in hand and I beam at them. "Out of the closet? What's the occasion?" I ask them. Jazz blushes and Edward chuckles. "A new beginning." Edward says smiling and I grimace.

"Does that mean I get to hear you and Jazzy getting on along with Em and Rose?" I ask whining. I notice that Bella is quiet behind me and when I look she's trying to hold in a laugh.

I shudder at the thought of getting to hear that and Bella laughs along with the rest of my siblings. Bella's head falls to my shoulder were she is crouching down her whole body shaking with laughter. "Babe, your too funny." She says lauging.

I roll my eyes at her and after a moment I escourt her along with the rest of my siblings to the living room. We all pick our chairs Bella and I choosing a love seat in the corner while Em sits on the floor and Rosalie on the couch behind him. Jazz and Edward sit at the end of said couch.

Bella speaks after a moment. "Does that mean, none of you hate me anyomore?" She asks. Rose craks a smile. "We never hated you, Bella. We just disliked the idea of you hurting Alice. I can see that its not going to happen and I think so can the rest. After all Alice did tell us you were in love and what not." She says waving her hand before running it through Emmetts' black curly locks.

I can practically hear Bella's blush and she ducks her head behind my shoulder. "Cats out of the bag, huh?" She asks softly to me. I shake my head and she sighs. "Thank your god. Hmmm, I wonder how I can tease you like this." She asks lowly in my ear.

I look at her in the eyes and shake my head. "Don't." I say looking over to my siblings who are all wrapped in their own world. Jazz and Edward looking in each others eyes, grabs my attention and Bella's.

"So… how long have they been dating?" She asks. I shrug. "Around a month, maybe more." I say. She nods and purses her lips. "So…they aren't out of the closet in school yet?" She asks and I shake my head.

She laughs softly. "That's kinda stupid, seeing as half the school is gay." She mumbles. I shrug. "Different people, different views." I say. She shrugs. "They remind me of something though." She says.

I frown. "What?" I ask. She chuckles and grabs her phone from her back pocket. "It's alive?" I ask. She rolls her eyes "Yeah, its alive. Its immortal and no where near the bath tub." She says.

She flips threw it before Edward's phone beeps and he grabs in and checks out whatever it is Bella sent him. He shrugs and presses a few buttons before at full blast the song. "Malchik-Gey" starts to play and I laugh.

Edward eyes land on me and Bella and he laughs softly before turning the song off. "I'm sorry Edward, Bella is just strangely obsessed with Tatu at the oddest moments." I say and he laughs.

"Don't worry about it, its now Jazzy's ring tone." He says and Jazz laughs. "I need that song for yours." He says and I groan and Bella laughs exitedly. "Score! It's freaking awesome!" She says and my brothers nod to her and she holds me closer.

"I want to be the object of your passion but its hopeless." She whispers in my ear and I grin at her and turn my head to kiss her lips. "You already are." I say to her and she grins and I turn away form her lips and stand and grab her hand.

"Later siblings." I say and pull Bella with me. Rosalie laughs. "Watch out Bella, you got the energizer bunny on crack there." She says and Bella laughs. "Isn't that what I'm supposed to want?" She asks before I pull her out of the living room.

I turn and kiss her lips once again and Bella pulls back. "What was that for?" She asks. And I grin. "For being an amazing girlfriend." I say hugging her. She hugs me and chuckles. "Anytime, baby. Anytime." She says kissing the top of my head.

**A/N: yes, I turned Jazz and Eddie gay, get over it. Next chapter will be the 'show me love' reference and after that you will have to keep REVIEWING for me to know what you want.**


	26. Chapter 26

_**A/N:**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**_

_**Ch.26**_

_**Bpov**_

I try to keep my eyes wide trying to stay awake but its not helping. I'm sleepy as fuck because I had to make a conference call to Paris. Why my company could not handle it I don't know, I'm guessing they demanded to speak with me for some god awful reason so I had to stay up all night talking to rude French people.

My eyes slowly close and I feel sleepiness creep up on me before something slam's down on my table and I jump and being on a stool I slide off of it and land on my butt. "Mother fucker." I groan my eyes snapping open and cupping my butt.

I glare at the teacher and she smiles. "Study hall, not nap time, Bella." She says sweetly. I glare and stand up and sit back on my stool. "Whatever." I say placing my arms on the table and leaning my chin on my folded arms. The teacher turns and walks down the isle to check on someone who would need help.

I feel a soft warm hand on my back and I open my eyes to see Alice's frowning face. I sigh and stretch before sitting back. "I'm good, tired as hell though." I say giving her a small grin.

She frowns a bit. "Didn't you sleep at all last night?" She asks. I shake my head. "Work called." I say grimacing a bit at the memory of the French dude. She frowns in understanding and rubs my back soothingly and I give her a small smile before paying attention to the teacher.

After a minute Alice had to tap my back to keep me awake so that's how we spent math. After the bell rings we walk together to lunch where I don't eat and practically sleep the whole hour. After I wake up with Alice and the rest of the tables laughter I lean my head back and groan.

"So, Bella. What happened with the French guy?" Jacob asks laughing softly. I frown. "How do you… shit, I talked in my sleep didn't I?" I ask. They all nod and laugh at my blush and I sigh. "Fucking rude French dude! Yelled at me about an order for around two hours then realized I was right and he hadn't ordered it. Didn't apologize and demanded I send over a shipment. Son of a bitch." I say and rub my eyes.

There is a chorus of bummer's and sucks then they all stayed quiet and I scratch my head. "I don't even know why I bother coming to school, its not like I have to graduate to get a career. I'm not even going to study after high school, I'm just planning on moving to Italy." I sigh.

I look up and see everyone stare at me in shock. "What do you mean why are you in school, you need to graduate." Jake says and I wave him off. "That used to be a problem but, my dad signed the papers before passing away, remember? He gave me full authority on the company. If I just dropped high school I can just focus 100% on my company." I say with a shrug.

"That's awesome!" Emmett and Seth says. Leah smacks him on the back of the head. "No its not, she will be a high school drop out." She says to them. I shake my head. "I can just take that aptitude test thingy. And they will mail my diploma. Its not like I have a parent to give them the gift of graduating for. It will just be me, then I get my diploma in silence, go to my house and most surely drink myself to sleep. All along not that differnet from my usual end of the month goodbye." I say and I look next to me and see a silent and slightly angry looking Alice.

"You wouldn't have no one, I would be there. I would cheer for you and I would celebrate with you, hell my family would demand your presence. Its good to know that means nothing to you at all, Bella. Really, it warms my heart." She says and gets up from her seat next to me and storms out of the lunch room.

I stare at her in shock and not understanding of what the hell just happened. "What the hell just happened?" I ask turning back to the table. The Cullen's are biting their lips to fight the laughter and Seth, Leah and Jake look as lost as I do.

"Bella, its not you. She's just extra pissy this morning." Rosalie says with a small smile. I frown and cock my head to the side. "What?" I ask. Rosalie laughs. "Bella, she's next in line to get a gift this month." She says slowly.

I raise an eyebrow. "From who? I didn't send her anything." I say frowning and the whole table laughs. Jake chuckles. "Bella, she's PMS' sing." He says. And my eyes go wide. "Ohh… shit." I say and slap my forehead.

Rosalie chuckles. "Really Bella? You needed someone to spell it out for you?" She asks. I frown a bit and duck my head. "I, um.. don't… get it." I say and she laughs. "What's not to get, you didn't understand and I'm just telling you." She says confused. I shake my head and my cheeks burn red and I look at my tray of un-eaten food. "I know that, Rose. I just… I don't get my um, time of the month." I say to her.

She frowns. "What? Your menopausal?" She asks. And I shake my head and sit up straight. "Um, I.. a.. no. I had an accident involving a car hitting me while I was getting out off my bike and a piece of um metal pierced my abdomen and I had to get a full Hysterectomy. It was the only thing they could do to save me so… I don't get my period witch means I can't have kids." I say looking at the table.

"Oh my god. I'm…" Rosalie cuts off when I shake my head at her. "Don't feel sorry for me. I'm good. Just another thing not to worry about." I say with a shrug and I stand up with a sigh. "I guess I'll go find Alice and get her to forgive me." I say garbing the apple from my tray as I walk away to the doors.

I don't need to stray far as I walk around the corner and bump into her. "Oh, Alice. Look I'm sorry I didn't know and I, I'm new to this. I'm not used to caring about someone or having them care for me. I'm used to being alone and its strange but I'm trying." I say and look forward to see… not Alice.

"Bella." The voice purr's. I grimace. "Jessica, what, um, a pleasure. Look have you seen Alice?" I ask looking over her shoulder. "No, I haven't. I don't know why you even bother though, why have her when you can have all of us?" She asks.

I give a soft laugh. "All of who?" I ask giving her a incredulous look. Jessica role her eyes "Well, theres me, Irina, Victoria, Tanya, Samantha, Lauren, Mike, Taylor, Beth, Annie, Susan. Must I go on?" She asks.

I give her a laugh. "Sorry but none of you compare in the slightest to Alice." I say and go to side step her when she cuts forward. And places a hand on my hip and I hold her hand and pull her hand off me.

"Don't touch me, or I will snap it like a toothpick." I growl out. Jessica frowns. "I'm sorry, I forgot your only rule." She says giving me a pout. I throw her hand at her and run a hand through my hair.

"Look, have you seen Alice or not?" I ask. She shakes her head and I push past her to look for Alice. I'm turning the corner when I see Alice and… Kate. Kate is talking to my Alice in a hushed voice whipping tears from her cheek and I see red.

Why is Kate touching her? Why is she letting herself be touched by Kate? I hold myself back by the small voice in my head telling me 'she needs someone to comfort her.' I frown I can do that for her… cant I?...

I look back at Alice and Kate and see them share a smile and I feel a wave of pain go through me. Alice… I shake my head to clear it and take a deep breath. No, I'm not letting Alice go. I need her and she needs me… doesn't she?

I frown again and look back at Alice to see her look up and see me. Her eyes go wide and she stands up quickly from where she was sitting next to Kate at the foot of the lockers. I can't wash the pain out of my chest.

Maybe Alice doesn't need me…. maybe she can be happy with Kate? She can live a drama free life… I'm damaged goods. Kate as far as I know is clean of everything except being a bitch and that is only towards me.

I look back over my shoulder and see the exit… It be so easy to just sprint out there and run in the woods. Run for miles and just let Alice here with Kate and her family. I look back to see Alice walking over to me.

I look over her shoulder at Kate who is holding a smirk on her lips. I frown and giver her my own smirk, she think she can take my Alice? Wait, no. Alice isn't a sport. Alice isn't like the other girls in this school who have served as a game for me, Kate and Jake.

She follows behind Alice quietly until Alice is right in front of me and I'm still leaning against the locker looking at Kate with a serious expression. I look down when Alice clears her though. "Alice… I'm so sorry. I know your there for me. I'm just so used to being alone, I'm not used to care for someone and vice versa. I'm trying Alice, I really am. I just slip every once in a while. That dropping out thing was just a passing tough, I never really gave it any mind." I say looking in her hazel eyes.

"Bella…" She says quietly. But I'm not finished. "I love you Alice. And I'm trying so fucking hard to put my all out there, its just a bit hard. Just give me a chance Alice. Give me chances to show you how much I care for you." I say pushing off the locker and walking a step closer to her and grabbing her hand.

"Right now, you're the only thing giving me a reason to wake up every morning." I whisper softly to her bringing her hand to my cheek and curdling to it. "Bella, I'm sorry I acted like that. I wasn't mad at you. I was just hurt and confused and I'm sorry." She says.

I frown. "You were… confused… about, us?" I ask slowly dropping her hand from my cheek unable to stop the stab of pain from running through my chest but keeping most of it off my expression.

There's a soft Alice gasp and she cups my cheeks roughly in her hands and makes me look down at her. "No, no, no. I was just confused on what was going to happen if you drop out. I'm sorry I was selfish but I couldn't stop that from running through my mind. I love you too Bella. SO much and I don't think I can function without you." She says.

I pull her to me and kiss her a bit roughly. Until there's a clearing of a thought and I open my eyes and glare a bit not breaking the kiss until I sigh and pull back from Alice's addicting lips.

"Can I help you, Kate?" I ask steeping closer to her and glaring at her. How dare she try to talk to my Alice. I see her take a step back on instinct and I smirk and she frowns. "I was just wondering when this love fest was done if Alice would mind if I walked her to class." She says giving me a grin.

I glare deeper and step in front of Alice blocking her from Kate's sight. "That won't be necessary Kate, I'm her girlfriend I think I can handle walking her to and from classes. Even if the thought is worth something, your intentions are not." I say and smile when her eyes go a bit wide.

I look behind me and see Alice. "Alice, babe. Why don't you go to the lunchroom and finish lunch with your family. I will be right behind you." I say. Alice shakes her head and I sigh. "Alice, please. I just need a word." I say.

She hesitates but stands her grounds. "I'm not leaving you here to fight with her." She says. I frown, why does she care if Kate and I fight? Does she still feel something for Kate, I glare at Kate and grab her shirt and pin her against the locker roughly and with a bang as her head collides with the metal locker door.

"Alice is **mine**, Kate. She's not one of your stupid petty games, **understand**? You won't take her from me so don't even try, it's **never** worked. And if you or your sisters ever come close to her ever again I **won't hold back**." I say to her every other word slamming her against the locker.

"Bella, Bella let her go." Alice says and I push Kate harder against the locker. Why does she fucking care?! Is she afraid I might hurt Kate? NO! I stiff a look from Alice to Kate and slam her back against the locker. "Do you understand me?" I ask her again. Kate winces and nods. "Yeah, sure. She's not worth it." She groans out and I drop her to the ground before I punch her. "No, your not worth her." I correct before walking back and grabbing Alice's hand.

"Bella." She says and I walk down the hall with her in tow until we reach the door I was looking at earlier and step out. Alice speaks again. "Bella, you just can't go around beating people-" She's cut off by my lips on hers.

I kiss her with all the lust I have in me, with everything I have I kiss her. "I was… so jealous….I…. I can't…. Help it…. your mine Alice….mine…. Can't you see that?... I can't live…. If you don't…. feel the same way." I say in between frantic kisses to her sweet lips. I'm being fragile but keeping it leveraged by keep kissing her and making her feel just as fragile.

"Bella…" She breaths before kissing me back harder and I push her against the wall needing to feel all of her around me. I knot a hand in her short hair and the other on her waist pulling her closer to me

"I love you…. so much… don't leave me…. give me a chance…. Give us a chance." I say to her neck while I kiss, lick and bite on it. "God, Bella…. I love you, yesss. I didn't…. give up on you… fuck… Bella, baby. Stop, I can't… shit." She breaths out in pants.

I kiss her neck once more before shifting to her other side. "You can't what, Alice?" I ask against her neck while I kiss it. "I… I can't, think… straight, shit.. ughh... you feel so good." She says when I cup her ass in my hand and squeeze tightly.

I kiss up her neck to under her ear and to her ear lobe and suck it into my mouth where I run my teeth over it. "I need you, Alice…." I whisper out and grind on her hips. I need friction, I need her. I need to taste her, I need to feel her and I need to hear her scream my name as I make her climax.

Just the pure thought of it, her face scrunched up in orgasm like last time makes me shudder with want and I run my hand up her bare legs and up her thigh where she wore a skirt today.

I run my hand up her smooth skinned thighs until I'm on the inner thigh and I'm right under her center. I can feel the heat of her and I whimper. "Alice…" I breath out and I hear her breath. "Yes." Before I cup her from over her damp panties. I moan. "So wet… are you wet for me Alice?" I ask burying my head in her neck.

"Yes…" She says and I muffle my moan in her neck. "Is all of this for me?" I ask needing her to speak. I need her to keep talking but every time she opens that mouth of hers it just makes me more horny.

"Yes, all for you baby." She says and as for emphasis she thrust against my placed hand and she moans. I bring her lips to me and I bite her lips and pull on it and suck it into my mouth and I kiss her.

All the things I can show her, all the ways I can make her feel good. I shudder and moan when she brings her leg in between mine and her thigh rubs against my aching center. I want so much more, how much I want to rip her button up shirt open and see her perfect breasts and take them into my mouth.

How I want to kneel down in front of her and eat her but… I can't. Not here and not like this. I whimper and pull away and step back and Alice whimpers at the lost of contact. I knot both hands in my hair and tug trying to get rid of the tension I'm feeling.

Trying with all I can to ignore the throbbing in between my legs and Alice's flush face and her breast huffing up and down as she takes breaths. I shake my head when I stare at her breast for too long and bite my lips and close my eyes trying to get some control over my hormones.

After a moment I take a bated breath and look over at Alice who seems to have calmed down tremendously by herself…. What else does she do all by herself?.. Fuck! No, bad girl. I shake my head again and I hear Alice's soft tinkling laugh.

I look up at her eyes and their sparkling. "I love when you get possessive and jealous. It's a tremendous turn on." She says coolly and I shake my head again and give her a soft grin. "Your driving me crazy, Alice." I say to her.

She grins wider. "And you make me horny. Its an even trade." She says and I gasp at her little dirty mouth. I always thought of her as a prude. "I thought you were a prude." I say and she shrugs. "I can adapt to not being one." She says and there's a hungry glint in her eyes that absorbs me.

I look in her eyes and try to focus on sending her via mind that if we were at my house what I would do to her. She seems to understand everything I'm sending because her breathing becomes a bit labored and I grin at her before I walk forward and kiss her again.

I can't pull back, Alice is my drug. She is my brand of heroin and I can't get enough from my fix. The kiss is just getting good when the door next to us burst open to show an amused bunch of my friends. Jake, Seth and Leah are grinning and the Cullen's are looking amused at us.

I groan and step away from Alice and Seth looks at Jake. "You owe me twenty. They still have their clothes on." He says and I can't fight the laugh that escapes me. Alice gasp. "You bet on us?" She asks.

Seth looks up at her and shrugs. "Its Bella, she's done worse on this spot." He says and I duck my head and blush. "Bella!" Alice says and I shrug. "Hey, I'm the one that stopped us in the first place." I remind her and she blushes and turns when Emmett's bugging laughter starts.

"Alice!" Jazz, Edward and Rose say at the same time. She turns and shrugs. "I'm sorry, but if you hadn't noticed. I have an incredibly sexy girlfriend who is way to tempting." She says and I grin.

"Bella, wipe that grin off your face or I'm not kissing you for a week." She says not looking at me and I frown. "Hey! How did you know I was grinning?" I ask and she turns to look at me in the eyes.

"Honey, your kinda predictable." She says and I gasp. "Really? You didn't seem to think so when I-" I'm cut of by her hand on my lips. "Bella, for God's sake shut up." She says, eyes wide. I raise an eyebrow and lick her hand and she drops my hand saying 'ew.' And I grin.

"I don't Believe in God so, You didn't say that when I had you against the wall and I was kissing your neck and you-" I'm cut off this time by her lips on mine. Shit, she's lucky I like kissing her or I would have finished the story.

Alice waves her family off with her hand before knotting it in my hair and I send a wink to them before kissing her back and closing my eyes. "Bella, if you touch my sister I will key my name in your car." Rosalie says and I quickly pull away from Alice.

"You wouldn't." I say pulling Alice's body closer to my own. She raises an eyebrow and I grin and slowly trail my hand down her back until I feel Alice shudder under me and Rosalie takes out her car keys. I drop my hand and pull away fully from Alice.

I look at her and back at Rosalie. "I'm sorry darling, but my car." I say looking in her eyes. Alice frowns. "You care more about your car then you do about me?" She asks. I shake my head. "I care more about you, cause if Rosalie touches my car I will kill her and you will be sad." I say and kiss her nose.

She chuckles. "Such a strange girl." Alice says and we walk with the group to the main hall. "Yeah, I am. But you love me." I say grinning. She nods. "That I do." She says and I smile as we walk to Biology.

I hated how they kept changing our schedule classes every day. Which meant every student in school had five different schedules to follow, the only thing that didn't change was my last class, Gym.

It was common when I would take classes with Alice in them after the first three morning classes but every other they I would have them mixed up gym the only non-changing period.

I grin as I walk to biology and sit down next to Alice. "Hmm… I really like our table more since that storm." I say lowly in her ear before sitting back and paying extra attention to the class.

**Apov**

"Hmm… I really like our table more since that storm." Bella says lowly in my ear before sitting back and looking at the teacher. I shudder and I feel my self drip, Fuuuuck. _I'll get you back for that Bella._ I think before trying my best to ignore the aching throb in between my legs.

Bella, she will be the death of me. I will fade into combustion, unless I make this girl have sex with me. Oh, this is going to be a fun Monday study session. I think to myself as I start writing down the biology homework.

**A/N: Yeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii new chapter! Review and I will update tomorrow! You guys like it? I did, a lot! Next chapter…. Don't know, I haven't written it yet. *wink* I'm open for suggestions on how Alice will make it a fun Monday study session? Reason behind all the schedules i cant remember for the life of me what classes they have. **

**And i really didn't feel like reading the hole story again jut to get that small detail.**


	27. Chapter 27

_**A/N: So, Monday study secion! Lemon, lemon and more lemon's. Very detailed so if you don't like detailed um, chapters. Wait till I publish the next one, you will not miss anything crusial to the story.**_

_**READ THE A/N AND I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**SERIOUSLY… READ THE A/N**_

_**Ch.27**_

_**Bpov**_

_I pin Alice against my car as I kiss her, I can't help it. I want her so freaking bad, it hurts. I bite her lower lip slowly as I pull away and take a breath of needed air. "God, Alice…" I mumble as she kisses down my neck her hands dangerously close to my breasts._

_I trail my hand over her ass and pull her to me, grinding against her core. This isn't enough, I lift her so that she is sitting on the hood of my car and her legs are around my waist. I can feel her wet heat on mine and I strangle out a moan before rubbing against her._

_I shudder and bring my lips back to hers and she pulls me impossibly closer to herself. She opens her mouth to lick up my neck and speak to my ear. "BEEEEEEP." She says and I pull away with a confused face._

_"What?" I ask her. She smiles at me- that seductive 'I want you' smile- and opens her mouth. "BEEEEEEP." She says. I frown and go to speak when she fades from my veiw leaving me and my car alone, I turn around and look for her but its all black. Nothing, no Alice._

_Panic sets in and I open my mouth to scream._

_~end dream~_

"Alice!" I yell jumping up and panting. I look around the room and see that I'm on my bed and that beeping sound is my phone. I pick it up and give a breathless. "He-hello?" I ask leaning back down on my bed and running a hand through my hair.

"Bella, why are you breathless? Is everything ok?" Alice's soft voice comes through the speaker. I sigh. "Hey, babe. Nothing, just a bad dream." I say rubbing a hand against my face.

"Oh, I'm sorry baby. But, if you open the front door I'm sure I can make you forget all about your horrible dream." She says. I chuckle. "I don't feel like getting up, just use the key that is under the stone in the potted plant." I say.

She's quiet for a moment until there is a, "Got it." and she opens the door. "Where are you my love?" She asks, I hear the click of the door closing and locking. I chuckle. "In my room." I say with a yawn.

"I shall be on my way, to wake you with a kiss, my sleeping beauty. But first I must slay the dragon." She jokes. I snort. "Just get your pretty ass up here." I say. She laughs and I hear her sigh. "Fine, on my way up." She says. I nod. "See ya." I say and with that we hang up.

I close my eyes and place my hand behind my head and listen to the house. After a moment I hear light footsteps walking over to my room. I smirk a little but wipe it off my face when I hear the soft click of my door as she opens it.

I keep breathing normaly as I hear her soft pit pat as she shuffles to the bed. I hear a 'hmm' before the bed dips as she climbs up. Before I know it she straddles my waist and presses her front to mine as she kisses my lips.

I hmm. "If I could wake up everyone morning like this, I woudnt complain." I say in a tired voice when she snuggles her head in my neck. I wrap my arm around her and press her to me, she feels so good.

My dream comes back to me and I tense and shudder. I feel Alice shift over me and I open my eyes slowly to see her looking at me through her beautiful wide eyes. "What's wrong?" She asks.

I smile and shake my head. "Nothing." I say my voice gruff from sleep. She nods once not believeing me and kisses my neck twice. "Won't you tell me?" She asks against my neck and I hmm.

"No." I say and gasp a bit when she bites my neck teasingly, a wave of pleasure follows that and settles on my core. "Please..?" She asks breathlessly. I suppress a moan when her hand trails down to my thigh and she starts to rub up and down like that day in biology.

"You… I dreamt about you." I say in a breathy tone. I hear her hmm in approval. "What about me? What was the dream about baby?" She asks against my ear, her hot breath tickling me there in such a pleasant way.

I shudder as her hand brushes against my center. "Um, you and me… making out… ugh..… touching on my car." I say as her hand brushes the crotch of my pants again. "That's all we did?" She asks under my ear. I nod and gulp and she cups my crotch.

"Bella…" Alice moans out no surprise feeling how wet I am. I shift until her back is to the bed and I'm kissing her sweet addicting lips. "God, Alice. Please…" I rasp out. I cup one of her breast and squeeze it softly in my hand and she arches her back into me.

"What do you.. want baby?" Alice asks breathlessly. I lock my jaw and go right to hear ear and say it slowly. "I want to fuck you so bad, you will forget your name." I say with a coky smirk before I take her lobe in my mouth.

She moans but after a few minutes when I'm right about to rip her clothes off she pulls away from me. I open my eyes to look at her darker hazle eyes and raise an eyebrow. "What is it baby?" I ask looking in her eyes.

She bites her lips before shaking her head. I stiffen before I roll off of her and sit at the edge of my bed. I'm pissed but I understand. She's not ready, I thought she was. She acted like she was but… she's not fucking ready.

I take a deep breath before lying back on the bed and I pull her to me and just hug her. I won't make her feel bad for wanting to keep being pure. It's her body she needs to make the decisions.

"I'm not mad, I'm good." I say to her as I pull her close to me. "Bella, Bella wait, I didn't mean I wasn't ready." She says softly. I frown and pull away looking in her eyes "Alice… you pulled away from me and shook your head. It's hard to miss interpret." I say.

She sighs and runs a hand through her hair and stands up from the bed and that's when I notice what she is wearing. No fucking way, dear God give me strength to restrain myself.

Shes wearing a white button up top with the first three buttons poped showing a hint of her black lace bra, a kill me so short skirt that leaves zero for the imagination and long boots. She looks like Julia Volkova and I frown. "Alice, you look hot but, Why do you look like you just came out of a music video for tatu?" I ask.

She sighs. "I thought you would like it." She says. I gulp. "I, um, I do. But, you don't have to wear things like that just to please me. I think your hot in anything." I say looking at her eyes.

She raises a skeptical eyebrow. "Even in swets." She says. I grin. "Especially in sweets, you know why?" I ask. She shakes her head and I grin. "Because that's when you look your most comfortable, I appreciate the thought Alice but, your sexy to me in anything. Hell you can wear hay sacks and you will still look sexy to me." I say looking in her eyes.

Her eyes soften and before I know it she's on the bed again doing a sexy to death crawl towards me that shows me her bra covered breasts. I bite my lip but I can't pull my eyes away from them until she is right in front of me. "Your so beautiful." I say to her, looking in her deep hazel eyes.

Her eyes shine. "So are you." She says and I shake my head sadly. "I'm nothing Alice, I don't know why you bother with me. You can have so much better things..." I trail off shaking my head. She shakes her head and kisses me. "Why would I want better when I can have you?" She asks against my lips.

Just then she pulls back again and gives me a smile. "I'll be right back." She says and stands and walks to the bathroom. She closes the door behind herself and I sit back against my bed, today may actually turn out with me having sex with Alice Cullen.

No, correction. Today might turn out me making love to Alice Cullen. I shudder in excitement and lay down on the bed fully just waiting for her to show up. After a few minutes she opens the bathroom door and stands in front of my bed.

I lift my head up with my lazy grin and she smiles at me. "Why don't we take a dip in the hot tub? You look tense." She says. I open my mouth to speak but she trails her hand from behind her ear down her neck to the front of her shirt were she un-does the last five buttons in front of me.

My mouth is dry and my eyes are going to pop out of my head with lust. She stands there with her shirt wide open and all I can see is her perfect flawless ivory skin and her black bra. I gulp and she raises an eyebrow. "Bella?" She asks and my eyes snap out from her body to her face. "Hot tub?" She asks and I nod and get off the bed and she leads me to my bathroom where she turns around and stops me from entering.

She tip toes up to my ear and says seductively on a whole new level. "No clothes this time, Bella." She says and pulls back giving me a wink before she turns around and walks over to the tub.

I hold in a maon when I see her bend down to take her skirt off. Giving me a perfect view of her tight ass and black lace panties. Without a second thought I take off my shirt and kick off my jeans.

I grin when she turns around and gasp when she sees I'm not wearing a bra and I slide my underwear down so I'm bare in front of her. Her eyes roam over my body a few times before she gulps and shudders. "You're so beautiful." She says to me. I roll my eyes. "So are you." I remind her stepping closer to her when she's about to take off her bra and holding her hand.

"If you don't mind, I would love to do this part." I say to her gently as I stand behind her and kiss her neck. Her head tilts and she nods and I grin before running my hands up her back and massaging her back and I take the clasp off.

I move up to her shoulders and slide the straps down before massaging where they were once at. I trail kisses from the back of her neck to her shoulders to the center of her back while my hand goes to the front where Alice's hands are holding up the cups.

My hand slides from her flat stomach to her bra and I stay right in the middle of them and trail my fingers. I go to her ear. "Let go." I say tugging on the soft peice of cloth.

Her hands gently let it go and I quickly cup both of her breasts and feel her lean back into me. "You are so breathtaking, mouthwatering really. Your like a Godess and I will worship you." I say to her ear before massaging her breast and kissing along her neck to her back.

I turn her around and look in her hooded eyes before kissing her neck and chest until I am in between her breast. "I'll kiss every inch of your body." I say against her peak before placing a kiss on it and taking it in my mouth. I suck on it gently giving her my full attention before I switch to the other one and give it the same treatment.

Her moans urging me on to nibble and her gasp of pleasure is enough to make me drip, I stiffle my own moan as I feel her hand knot in my hair and hold my head stedily against her breast. I lick each of them once more before trailing down, Alice's hand in my hair not leading me but following me to see what I'm planning.

I kneel in front off her and place kisses on her flat stomach and I grin a bit when I hear her maon. "I'll worship every part of you, my love. Like a Goddess fallen from the sky." I say to her kissing to her hip bone and running my hand along her toned firm and soft legs. I kiss her thighs until I reach the knee and I hear her whimper.

I switch to the other and to the same and once I reach the knee I trail kisses upward until my head is right in front of her core. I can smell her arousal and it's the most delicious and entizicing scent I have ever smelt. The smell itself makes my mouth watter.

My hands trail up from her thighs to her hips where I pull the edges of her underwear down slowly down her legs until she is uncovered from my eyes. I don't stop until her panties are at her ankles and she kicks them off when I hold her thighs and with a kiss to each of them I open her legs to me.

I hear her shuddering breath and before she can protest I giver her a swift hard lick that makes her legs quiver and her moan. Shit, her moan is incredible. "Your so beautiful." I say against her folds. "Ohh… Bella…." She moans.

I hear her whimper and again I place another lick, and another. Her juices tasting so good on my toungue that I can not stop. And I don't stop, I don't stop until I feel her shaking above me, when that happens I give her once more lick and replace my tongue with one soft nibble to her clit.

She moans my name again almost falling over. I wrap a hand around her waist and sit her on the steps off the hot tup and open her legs even wider to get a good look at her. "Your so fucking beautiful. My Goddess" I say before bringing my lips against her folds and with another lick.

"I want to make you feel good, Alice. I want to see you fall to peices because of me." I say against her entrance before I hear her whimper and I plunge my tongue into her. My eyes looking at her face as she gasp in shock before her eyebrows scrunch and she screams my name in the intensity of her climax.

I continue my rhythm with my tongue until its coated with her juices and I swallow all of it. I lick her folds until its clean and once I'm done I continue as her hand knots in my hair keeping me there. Her moans and my ocacional one the only sound in the dim candle lit room.

I grin to myself and this time I lick, nibble and plunge my tongue into her until she climaxes again. This time more powerful then the last as I feel her body spasm and shake above me. I lick her clean slowly this time savoring her taste until she's clean and I place a soft kiss to her center before I lean back on my heels careful not to brush my own damp center against my legs.

I untangle her hand from my hair and place a kiss on it softly. I look up in time to see her eyes opening and a lazy smile on her face, her hand cups my cheek and brings me to her and she kisses he, licking my lips and I stiffle a moan.

Does she know she's tasting herself on me? By her moan I think she does and what a fucking turn on. I shudder and she pulls apart for air, her forehead on mine. "I love you, I love you Bella. Thank you." She says each part kissing me.

I shake my head. "No thank you, Alice. Thank you for letting me make you feel good." I say to her before reattaching her lips to mine. She leans back and before I know it my face is soaked in water.

I blink up to see Alice's devilish smile and I grin. "That wasn't nice Alice." I say to her. She shrugs. "I never said I was." She says.

I grin. "Good, because I know I'm not." I say before I pull her to me forgetting the stupid hot tub and bringing her to my bed where I lay her gently and kiss the living day lights out of her.

I don't stop until I feel her hand on my center and I moan into her mouth. I pull away. "You don't have to, aw fuck." I finish up yelling as she slides the underwear to the side and plunges a finger in me.

I let Alice flip us over and I moan again when she curls her finger on the way out. "Your turn, baby." She says before pulling her finger out and looking in my eyes as she licks it clean. My eyes go wide and my body spasms in pleasure, that was incredibly sexy.

"You taste so good." She says pulling down my underwear and looking at my center. I lift my head a bit to see her hodded eyes zeroed in my center and then to me. "Beautiful, mouthwatering, sexy, incredible. Do you know a perfect word to describe you?" She asks me leaning forward.

I shake my head and she kisses my lips, her fingers once against me, lining up on my entrance and before I regeister it, she whispers in my ear. "Mine." Before plunging two fingers in me making me spasm and moan in pleasure. She pumps and curls her fingers out of me.

I can't breath straight or think clearly and then I hear Alice's deep sexy voice next to my ear. "What do I do now?" She asks and then I remember, shit. She hasn't done this before. I try to clear my head a bit and take a shuddering breath. "H-have you ever, touched yourself Alice?" I ask still enjoying her fingers that curl and uncurl in me and still moving in and out.

"Yes." She says and I moan at the image. "Fuck, then. Do that. Do what you do on yourself… just fuuuuck, do it on me." I say my jaw opening and closing with ever pump of her fingers.

She hesitates before placing a thumb on my clit making me moan out. "Fuck, yess. Baby, just like that." I say to her. "G-go with… fuck yes… instinct. Do w-what you.. ohh god… do what you want to do." I barely manage to speak out.

She hesitates before I feel her hot breath on my chest. "Like this?" She asks. I open my mouth to respond but she added another finger in me which only made a loud moan come out. I hear her soft pant and when I manage to open my eyes I see her looking at me with dark eyes.

"I… I don't know what to do." She says softly. I bite my lip and manage to speak out. "Kiss me." I say to her. She stops for a moment and my voice gets a bit louder, I can't last long. "Kiss me, Alice." I order.

And before a second has passed her lips are on mine. I girn against her lips and knot a hand in her hair and I start to move my hips against her fingers rearranging the rhythm for a more pleasant one and taking her free hand and placing it on my chest.

I pull away from her lips with a gasp. "Fuck… just like that… don't stop." I tell her. She continues her work masgaing my breast, her fingers thrusting and her lips on my neck. "Fuck… Alice, so good… shit… oh god… yesss." I hiss out when she thrust in to me deeply brushing against my G-spot.

"Right there Alice… again." I say and she pushes deeper in me and misses. I still moan. "Feel around for it…. fuck… you'll find it…. just.. oh god. Don't fucking sotp." I maon out arching my back into her.

I shudder a bit when I feel her hit my spot again. "Right there." I say to her. I feel her smile against my neck before she pushes her fingers deep into me and hits the spot and I maon.

I feel my muscles clench on her fingers and I lose one hand from the sheets and trail it to my clit. I start to rub circles on it while telling Alice to keep moving. "Shit, baby I'm so close… can you feel that…. Fuuuck… that's all you Alice… oh, god. Yessss." I hiss out thrusting my hips against her plunging fingers getting it in deeper and making her hit my stop with each thrust.

I feel my walls clench perfectly and I flick my fingers against my clit and I go over the edge. I spasm and shudder and I feel my eyes roll back in my head in pure pleasure. "Keep movinig." I tell her even though I can't feel my mouth.

She moves her hand in and out of me and I reach my climax. "Aliceeeee" I moan out shuddering and spasiming. My muscles turning into nothing and my mind going blank until the final wave. Once its over I grab Alice's wrist and pull her out of me before trying to even out my breathing.

"Shit… that was… amazing Alice… the best orgasms… of my life." I pant to her. I open my eyes to see Alice sucking on her fingers and I shudder before pulling her fingers out of her mouth and bringing her face down to mine.

I kiss her sweet lips and I taste myself on her tongue. I don't care, I actually kind of like my taste before I start to deepen the kiss until I pull back and place a kiss on her nose, chin, forehead and lips before setting back.

"Your amazing." I say lowly to her hugging her naked form to me. Her body modling into mine, I bring the comforter over us and snuggle her to me. "Stay the night." I whisper in her ear. She chuckles softly "I kinda invited myself over. My bags are down stairs… do you mind?" She asks.

I turn her around to face me and giver her a searing kiss and a smile. "After the incredible orgasm you gave me, I don't mind a thing you do." I say looking in her eyes. She smiles and cups my cheek before pecking my lips. "Good. Oh and I love when you order me around, such a turn on." She says to me.

I grin back a sleepy smile. "I'll keep that in mind, love. I love you, my Goddess." I say to her pulling her to me. "And I love you, my Bella." She says and just like that, I feel myself fade in to a dreamless yet peaceful sleep.

**A/N: Wow! Who thinks that was awesome! Awww, Alice is learning. Bella is a good teacher… wonder why? Lol, so that's pretty much it. Till next time lovely's. REVIEW'S ARE MANDATORY!  
**


	28. Chapter 28

_**A/N: Sorry if it's not to good, I'm kinda sad at the moment. My friend transferred schools and I'm going to miss her like crazy. She was like a little sister. ;'(**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**_

_**Ch.28**_

_**Bpov**_

I look out my sliding glass door and stare into the deep pitch black night. No clouds, only stars are seen and the moon shining high above them. I sigh and pull the small warm body closer to my own and snuggle a bit against Alice's head and kiss it.

Alice… she's amazing. It's weird that I haven't felt my clausterphobia creep in since I'm holding Alice's naked form against my own. Her skin against mine, I can't help the smile that makes it way over my features and I can't help but feel extremely happy.

Alice and I had sex, in my opinion it was one of the greates sex I have had. Maybe that is what it feels like to be in love and have sex? Total bliss and I mean like mind blowing bliss.

I sigh and look at my new bed side table clock and see that its 4:53 am. And with a regretful sigh I kiss the top of Alice's head and disentangle myself from her. I hope she doesn't wake up as I stand up from the bed and go to my dresser and throw some clothes on.

I frown and look back at Alice all curled up on the bed and all I want to do is curl back with her. I sigh and walk quietly out of my room and down the hall and down the stairs to my fathers office.

With a small grimace I open the door and leave it open as I walk to my father's old desk and sit in his chair. I sigh and look around the office, have I really become my father? No, I haven't. I sigh and run a hand through my brown hair that mimics his.

And drum my fingers on my dad's desk. "What was your obsession with this room, dad?" I ask myself as I bite my lip and scan the room. I sigh and get to the reason for being up so damn early and not curling up with Alice like I want to.

I grab the phone on the desk and dial up Jenks. He picks up on the second ring. "Hello?" He asks. I sigh. "Hey, what did you want to talk about?" I ask cutting straight to the point. He sighs and shuffles through some things that sound like papers. "Well, I wanted to tell you that that Mr. Bon-Serate was most pleased with our quick shipping and wished to invite you to a function." Jenks says.

I frown. "You don't say? What type of function and where will it be held and when." I say. Jenks chuckles. "It's a fund raiser for his charity and it will be held in Paris on the luxery plaza." He says. I nod and hum. "When is it?" I ask.

"The date is for next week and Mr. Bon-Serate said he would pay for you and a guest on his private yet." He says. I raise an eyebrow and grin. "And a guest? Hmm… interesting." I say.

Would Alice's parents let me take her? God, I hope so. I would love to take Alice to Paris for a long weekend. "I'll have to check if her parents will let her go, but I think I will accept the invitation." I say. Jenks laughs softly. "Her? Can it be that you are finaly settling down?" He teases. I chuckle "I'm planning on it." I say. He gasps. "It cannot be, the Swan girl is settling down. Apocolipse." He says. I roll my eyes. "Bye Jenks, but I still don't see why the hell you had to wake me up to tell me this." I say angrily.

He sighs. "It's not the only thing I wanted to inform you about. The other is not as good." He says. I frown. "What is it Jenks." I say warily. He sighs. "Another woman showed up saying she has a daugther that is in fact Charlie Swan's." He says.

I freeze and anger flashes through me. "You have got to be kidding me." I growl out. "N-no, I wish I was but she passed through the office a few days ago stating she has a daugther maybe a year younger then you that is in fact Charlie's." He sighs.

I smirk. "Fine, we will have a fucking blood test, if she is in fact my fathers child I will give her what is Charlies money. A bank acaunt of 1,000 dollars. Because the rest of the money in all our accounts are under my name and I will be damned if someone is taking that away from me." I say angrily.

"Bella, we both know your father had a child-" I cut him off. "My father had no one but me! it was a rumor! He would never do that to my family! He would have told me, don't you dare slander my fathers name Jenks. Don't you fucking dare!" I snarl out slaming my fist against the desk.

Jenks falls silent. "I will not stand here, and let you disgrace my fathers name for the sake of rumors. Don't you dare speak that way about my father again, Jenks. Don't you dare." I say angrily in to the phone. "I- Im sorry Bella. I- I would never mean to insult you or your father." He says quickly.

"Have that stupid blood test, I know it will prove negative. Do not let this go public." I say to him. "As you wish." He says and with that I shut the phone and run a hand through my hair.

I'm so angry, I doubt I can go back to bed. I fist my hands on the stupid papers on the desk before I release them and storm out of the room and down the hall to the small gym. Once I get there I let the door wide open and put on my ipod. Alice won't wake up until an hour and I really need to blow of some steam.

I grab my kick boxing gloves and put them on and glare at the punching bag. I stretch for a bit my ears blazing with. "Three days grace- Riot" and I start throwing combo's precisely. Breath as you throw the punch to let it hit officinatly. Duck when you least think appropriate and try to double over and shoot a kick. After half an hour I'm sweating like crazy and my stomach is growling. I take off my ipod and walk quietly up the stairs and to my room.

I look to the bed to see Alice still curled up on the bed and I chuckle when I see her snuggle in deeper to my pillow. My god, this girl is adorable. With a silly smile on my face and my anger soon forgotten I grab my change of clothes and head to the shower.

I turn it on and take a quick warm yet thorough shower. Before slipping out and getting dressed. I let my hair just air dry as I make my way out of the bathroom and look to the bed. I chuckle and walk over and sit down on the bed and run a hand over Alice's covered legs and rub soothingly.

"Alice…. Alice honey wake up." I say softly to her. She stirs but doesntt react. I lean forward and grin before I start kissing her neck. I kiss, lick and nibble at her neck until I hear her moan. I smirk and pull back to see Alice's hodded eyes and a lazy smile.

"Morning." I say softly. She smiles at me. "Morning." She says back. I chuckle and lean forward and give her a quick peck on the lips before I pull back and smile at her "What a way to wake up if I do say so myself." Alice says with a lazy smile. I chuckle and ruffle her crazy hair. "Get up, beautiful. Get redy for the day, I'll cook you something to eat." I say.

She raises an eyebrow. "You can cook?" She asks. I roll my eyes. "I do live alone, of course I do." I say chuckling. She rolls her eyes but snuggles in deeper to the bed "Five more minutes." She mumbles. I chuckle and lean over her and press my weight against her and snuggle her.

"Get up, even better I will take you to the diner off the highway. You can order the strawberry house waffle's again." I say chuckling. Alice struggles aginst me. "Fine, fine I'm up, I'm up." She says. I laugh and roll off of her and to my bed.

"I really do love those waffles." She says standing up from the bed and my eyes are instantly trained on her naked form. Her smooth alabaster skin, her pink nipples and her toned body was the exact combination that made me whimper. Alice not hearing my whimper turns around giving me a perfect view of her back and ass and walks to bathroom.

"T-theres a tooth brush o-on the holder for you." I call out to her. "Thank you." She says but my mind is still flashing the images I saw of her naked body just giving me more flashbacks from last night.

I fall against my bed trying not to be so damn horny when I look back to the bathroom the door is open and the shower is on. I shake my head and walk out of my room and down to my living room.

There I settle and watch CNN while I wait for Alice. After half an hour Alice walks down from the stairs looking amazing… in my clothes. I can't help my grin as I Alice sits on my lap and snuggles into my neck and I hug her to me. "Did you know something?" I say to her.

She shakes her head. "What?" She asks against my neck. I hug her to me and cherish the feeling of her in my arms. "I love you." I say the most sincerest tone I have. I want her to know I mean it with everything I have. She snuggles into my neck like a little kitten and I chuckle and squeeze her to me tightly. "I love you too." She says.

I sigh and shift my head to kiss her forehead, her cheek, her nose, her eye and the corner of her lips. She chuckles and pulls away still sitting on my lap and pouts. I chuckle and kiss her lips softly. "I am completely and irrevocably in love with you Mary Alice Brandon Cullen. You own my heart and I don't see anyone ever holding it as you do." I say to her looking in her hazel eyes.

I see her eyes swell with tears and I frown. "Don't cry, I'm sorry." I say not knowing what I said wrong. Alice chuckles. "You did nothing wrong you fool, these are happy tears, because. I love you too Bella. I love you so much that I feel complete now." She says.

I feel a lump grow in my throat and I shake my head with a smile on my lips. "How did I ever get lucky enough to get you?" I ask her. She chuckles and looks in my eyes. "Don't you think it was about time God gave you a break?" She teases.

I smile, "Yeah, I think your right." I say seriously. She frowns. "I was joking." She says. I shrug. "For you to be in my arms there has to be at least some higher power that doesn't have it out for me all the time." I say.

She chuckles. "You are so silly." She says. I nod. "Yup, I am. Now are you hungry love?" I ask. She nods and I flick the TV off and stand up and carry her to the foyer where our book bags are at. I place her on the floor and let my eyes rake up her body again.

She is wearing my red and black plaid button up shirt closed and the same pair of jeans she was wearing yesterday in school. Her hair is slicked down in a style I have only seen once the day of our date and I love it. I grin as I pick up her book bag and my own and walk out of the door.

"Close the door won't you love?" I ask. She nods and reaches for the key under the rock and an idea pops up. "Keep the key. That way you don't have to knock everytime you come over." I say with a shrug.

Alice's eyes are wide and she looks from the key to me a few times before nodding and sliping the key in her key ring. I chuckle and walk down the steps and to the garage where I open it and file into the Mercedes.

Once she opens her door and sits in I pull out and drive on to the road. I laugh when I hear Alice sing along to the music and I smile at her as I drive slowly to the diner. Once we get there Alice hops out of the car and tworls like a ballerina towards me.

I laugh softly at her energy and throw an arm around her shoulders and together we walk to the diner and order our food.

**OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo **

**Apov**

I sit down at our table at lunch and Bella is still nowhere to be seen. I frown and drum my fingers against the table as I slowly eat my pizza. Jake, Leah, Seth and my siblings are talking and laughing but, I'm just wondering where the hell my Bella is.

Just then the doors to the lunch room fly open to show a really pissed off Bella. My eyes fa]ollow her as she stalks over to the bimbo's and holds Tanya by the collar of her shirt and holds her up.

"What the fuck did you write on my car?" She yells. Our table fell silent as we all look at Bella. Tanya's face looks like she is about to pee her pants and she stays quiet. Bella shakes her roughly "What did you write on my car, you bitch." She yells.

"N-nothing." Tanya says. "You sure about that? So are you fucking sure you did not write 'Daughter of a Cheater on my car?" Bella yells. Just then Kate flashes to Bella and grabs her arm. "Let go of my sister." Kate says. I stand and so does the rest of the table.

Bella smirks. "Fine by me." She says before pushing Tanya toward Kate and they both fall to the ground. I go to dash over to Bella when Jake's arm holds me steady. "Don't, Alice. I'll handle it." He says as he walks over to Bella.

Kate pushes Tanya off of her and stands in front of Bella. "Your going to pay for that." She growls. Bella smirks and without warning throws a punch to her face. "No, you will, you fucking slut. If you want to be a man so fucking bad I will pay for your operation. You and your sisters are nothing but filth and I'll make sure to make the world known that." Bella snarls darkly to her.

Jake reaches her then and grabs Bella by the arms. "Bella, calm down." He says. Bella glares at Tanya and Kate and tries to shake Jake off of her. "Let me go." She says. Jake doesn't move and Bella thrashes out. "Let me go and show them, they know nothing about my life." Bella thrashes.

I frown and I can't help it I jog over to Bella and stand in front of her. "Bella, baby calm down." I say to her. She shifts to look at me and her eyes flash but she shakes her head and closes her eyes. "Alice…" She says shaking her head.

I cup her cheeks. "Baby, look at me." I plead. Bella opens her eyes and stares at me. "What Alice?" She asks in a tired tone. "Calm down, baby. Please, just calm down and take a walk with me." I plead. She frowns and slouches. "Fine, Jacob let me go." She says.

Jake lets her go and she takes a step toward me and places an arm around my shoulders and kisses my forehead before we take our couple of steps. Bella sighs and looks back at the girls. "I'll send you the pretty bill for the new paint job, for your information its going to cost more then what your house is worth." Bella says before walking over to the table.

She sits there and just glares at the table before smaking her hands down on it and standing up. She walks out the back of the door and I follow her quicky. I frown when I see her sitting on the picnic tables smoking.

I walk forward and see that Bella is just staring blankly at the ground. "Bella?" I call out softly. Her eyes snap up to mine instantly. "Yeah?" She asks. I walk forward and stand in between her legs and look at her. "What's bothering you so much?" I ask.

She frowns. "Nothing you need to worry about, beautiful. Trust me, I'm fine." She says. I sigh and place my head on her shoulder and she sighs. "I just hate that no matter how perfect our time alone was, some idiot had to go and fuck up my blessed mood." She says.

I nod. "Don't worry, we will have thousand chances to be blessed out, yet they won't have enough ." I say snuggling into her shoulder. Bella chuckles and kisses the top of my head. "Must you talk like a fortune cookie?" She asks me.

I laugh at her. "I do not sound like a fortune cookie." I say looking at her eyes. Bella nods. "Your right… your way better then a fortune cookie." She says with a wink. I roll my eyes and take the cig from her hand and take a drag.

I blow it out. "You should lighten up darling. No matter what bothers you just know I will always love you." I say and hand her the cig back. She nods and takes a drag and blows it out and smiles at me. "Un-break my heart, say you love me again. Un-do this hurt you caused when you walked out the door and walked out my life. Un-cry these tears, I've cried so many nights un-break my heart…" She sings.

I laugh. "Who sings that?" I ask. She grins. "Tony Braxton." She says. I nod. "I'll check it out." I say she grins wider. "Un-cry these tears! I've cried so many nights! Un-break my heart!" She sings and I shut her up by kissing her.

"and I! will always love you!" She sings and I laugh at her horrible Whitney Huston impression. "I'll love you forever, even if you don't know how to hold a note like Whitney Huston." I say and she pouts. "I have a great voice." She says.

I nod. "You do, just not like Whiteny." I say and she laughs and kisses my cheek. "Crazy girl." She says and slides off the bench and puts out her cig. "Let's go finish lunch in the room. I'm hungry now." She says.

I nod and we walk together to the cafeteria. Smiles on both our faces.

**A/N: Boring chapter but I need to space things out! Peace out! Review! Pet a monkey. Hug a fish. Sing to a loved one and enjoy every moment you have with your friends.**

**Partly dedicated to my friend who is moving schools Niyma. Love you girl, even though you will never read this story ;)**


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: thanks to all your reviews! They mean the world to me! This will give you a bigger insight of Bella's mind. Just so you know.**

**Slim14 no, I have not seen south of nowhere… why?**

**Lost-lil-Neko awww, thanks!**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**

**Ch.29**

**Bpov**

**(One month after the last chapter)**

I'm pacing back and forth looking or well glaring at the note on my fathers desk. His will left me this note but I have never opened it. Not entirely certain I wanted to know what my father wanted me to know about him that he could not tell me while he was alive.

I'm so fucking nervous, my hands are practically shaking. I'm sweating and I can feel the dreaded emotions seeping through my elaborately constructed walls. I don't want to open the flood gates but I don't want the dam to burst either.

I look at the white envelope on the desk with my name in my fathers elegant script. The contrast from the black wood of his desk and that note are taunting. I knot a hand in my hair and huff slightly while I debate with myself whether or not to open this note.

I've had the same struggle for around two years. Since my dad died, that note has sat in the safe mocking me. But… I'm afraid what I will find. I'm not naïve as to believe its something good. My father was many things but when it came to telling me bad news he was a complete coward.

Which always struck me as odd, seeing as he fought in war and what not but, my guess was always that he hated hurting me and could never look in my eyes while telling me something bad.

My mind flashes to the night at the hospital when dad told me that Connor was still alive… the time in the waiting room when he told me mom had passed away… then it flashes to me in a hospital bed after my car accident.

I was alone, scared and then… I had just had my world flipped up side down with my father's death and facing that I was alone in this world when the doctors told me that because of that stupid bastard behind the wheel I would never had kids.

They had to save me and that was the only way how…. Didn't they know I wanted to die? Hadn't they seen the look on my face when they practically told me I was cursed to live alone without the possibility of having a child to at least shine some light in my dark life in the future?

I remembered everything, the way I had hated the world for so long… the destructive path I had taken after that. How I shifted from girl to boy to make me feel better. I had always known I was good looking, I might be a bit vain. But, I knew that I appealed to both sexes and I took advantage of that.

If my heart had to be so broken, why should other people, cruel people, have their hearts intact? Why should I be the only person suffering in pain? I had lost my mother, my girlfriend, been raped, lost my best friend, lost my father and my ability to have children. What was left for me?

Sure I had money, but no one to spend it on beside's myself. I had looks but no one to hold me and tell me how beautiful I was. I had good grades, but no one to impress. I was dead emotionally and I had wished for so long to be dead physically.

I began to resent myself and punish myself the only way I knew how. Being a self-destructive person. Not caring about consequences because I had no one to be disappointed in me, no one to watch over me, no one to upset if I had passed away.

Money would pay my way out of most things and others my age helped. Drugs, alcohol, sex and violence. The four things that kept me restrained enough not to kill myself. Though in the back of my mind, after ever shot, after ever pull, after ever punch I would wonder… what would happen if I just… didn't wake up?

Every night once I closed my eyes I would smile, the slight chance that I wouldn't wake up as my lullaby. My internal mantra, the only thing that brought comfort. Then the school noticed my destructive behavior, the therapist told me to take depression pills.

I had smirked at the idea, pills, weed, alcohol and violence. The universe was giving me my out. They were giving me every single thing I needed to kill myself slowly and painfully and not feel guilty about it.

One extra pill, one extra shot, one extra drag and one more punch. Anything that brought that solution to my problem was held with open arms but… it never came. I would take my medication and fall asleep. I would drink my medication with alcohol and get drugged.

I would try anything but… I couldn't find it in myself to just die. Why was that?

I shake my head violently at my thoughts. No! I won't give up life. Not now, not when I have Alice. I could never… I shake my head again and sit in the chair behind the desk.

It was pretty obvious to myself though, when Alice leaves me… I wouldn't have a reason to live anymore. I'm living for her, because strange enough she loves me and I love her. But… once she finds out how sick I really am. How my mind and my world are just… to much to bear.

She will leave. And when she does… I don't plan to live long after that. Just enough for her not to feel guilty about it. I wouldn't fandom the idea of telling her as many people would.

'If you leave me, I'll kill myself.' I snort. That is just asking for attention. I don't want attention, I just want my pain to stop. Alice, she takes the pain away but when she leaves… I'm back to being haunted.

When Alice leaves me for good, I will wait for at least a month before I act. I can just write a stupid note saying the stress of my business or that the memories of this town were to much for me.

Something… anything to not make Alice feel guilty. Because even when she leaves me, I will love her. I will always love her… I laugh to myself. "How strange is it to think about your own death so calmly." I state to myself.

"But… how would I do it? A gun is to messy… alcohol would make it look like an accident…. Hmm…. Depression pills? I can just "accidentally" take to many…" I trail off my eyes glued to that envelope.

I sigh and shake my head, I can't think of death. Alice is still in love with me and I won't dread about crossing the bridge until I'm there. I sigh again and look at the white envelope.

"You cause this you know." I say to it. Expecting it to answer… maybe I'm going insane? …. Yup. Shit, did I just answer myself? I think I did. Shit, just didn't again. Yeah, I'm going fucking crazy. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat! Just what I needed, dementia to the list of whats wrong with me.

I shake my head and stand grabbing the note and throwing it in the safe before I shut it forcefully. I walk back to the desk and open the other white envelope that I have been waiting for the past month. The damn DNA test for that girl. "Shanon Espinoza…." I read the name from the card in side.

I read through the note expertly until I reach the middle line. "The test prove… negative of all traces. 0% compatibility with the blood of Charlie Swan." I read and sigh in relief. I can't help the small laugh that escapes me as I crumple the note and throw it in the trashcan.

"Thanks to whoever is up there." I sigh and lean back in the chair. I had taken to use my fathers office more now, since Alice is over all the time and I don't want to have a mess everywhere.

I frown… Alice. She's pissed at me. I'm not completely sure what I did wrong but I know I upset her. Well, I kinda have an idea why… she was in no mood to fool around but I was just bugging her, I wasn't going to act on anything.

I was just trying to lighten up her sour mood because she got an F in biology. So I was bugging her that maybe if she studied human anatomy she would get better at it. That apparently caused her to get mad at me. I tried to joke around her anger, trying to make her crack a smile but it backfired.

_~flashback~_

_"What? So suddenly I'm just another fucking sex toy? If I don't feel like having sex, I won't Bella. Not everybody is fucking addicted to sex!" She yells at me when I parked the car in front of her driveway and offered getting her off to lighten up her mood._

_That was a big mistake. "Baby, what! I'm just saying that if you have an orgasm your mood will get a whole lot better. Its jut one 'F' its not the end of the world." I had said brushing it off._

_"This F means I can't go with you to Paris! Bella, my god take something seriously for once." She growls. I frown. "It suck's honey, but there will be more trips to Paris. If you can't come with me to this one I'll take you in the summer." I say smiling at her._

_She stares at me sadly. "Your gong without me?" she asks. I frown. "I kind have two, their expecting my visit beside, its just a room filled with boring business men. Nothing too entertaining, you were going to be the highlight of that trip but seeing as your not going, I'll cut it short." I say shrugging._

_"So, you just wanted me there to fuck while everyone bored you to death?" She growls. I stare at her in confusion. "Since when have I ever just used you for sex Alice! Never not once, where the hell is all this bull shit coming from?" I ask her._

_She turns her death glare on me and I stiffen a bit. "Oh, so now I'm talking bullshit." She says. I shrug. "You are!" I say and then she slapped me. I wince as I feel the stinging in my cheek and when I look back she's getting out of the car. I grab her arm and pull her back in._

_"What the hell has gotten in to you!?" I yell at her. She glares at me and I glare back holding her arm to keep her here. "The girls in the locker room are right aren't they?" She asks._

_I frown. "What girls in the locker room?" I ask. She slaps my hand away from her arm. "The girls! The ones that were flirting with you the other day! Your just with me because I'm something new! But once you get tired of sleeping with me your will just to the next girl. There right aren't they!" She says looking in my eyes._

_"It doesn't really mater what I say does it? You already made up your mind to who to believe. You rather believe the girls in the locker room? Then me, the person that loves you and who you love back? That's just peachy Alice, just fucking peachy." I say in a clip tone._

_She just stared at me for a long moment before speaking. "I don't know who to believe anymore. Your acting so distant lately but everytime I try talking to you just close up." She says. I glare at her. "Because there are some things I would rather you not know just yet." I say._

_She snorts. "Your acting like a frightened child. Everytime I bring up a subject you don't like you just ignore it." She says to me. I wince at the blow and clench my hands against the steering wheel until my knuckles are white._

_"I. Do. Not. Act. Like. A. Child. Mary Alice." I say slowly through girted teeth. She laughs. "Oh realy? You don't, you don't avoid conversations when they get to emotional. You don't try to joke around a problem? Face it Bella. Your just a scared child." She snaps at me._

_That did it. "You want a child Alice! Think about seeing your mother getting killed right in front of you when your fucking ten-years-old and having to grow the fuck up because your dad doesn't even know how to take care of you. Try acting like a child when your friend rapes you and your girlfriend thinks its your fault! Try acting like a child when your father is diagnosed with Cancer and there is nothing you can do but watch him die! I have never been a damn child Alice, I was forced to grow up. A privilege you still seem unneeded." I snap out._

_The car is quiet and without a word I start the car back up and drive her to her house. I stop right in front of her house but make no move to get out and open the door for her. "Bella…" Alice tries but I'm still angry._

_I turn to face her my eyes hard and cold. "What?" I clip out. I look in her eyes and see that she's about to cry, a part of me wants to hold her but damit! She makes me want to hurt her!_

_She makes me want to make her cry. I sigh and cup her cheek softly and bring her head over to mine and kiss her forehead. "I have to go pack up my suitcase for the plane tomorrow, you are still invited Alice. Just don't tell them about the grade until you get back." I say resting my forehead on hers._

_I'm still pissed but not so much at her then at her insecurities. "I can't.. the teacher already called them." She says softly. My eyes are closed, I don't want to stare in her eyes, the boiling anger is still beneath the surface. "Then I'll call you later tonight and see you tomorrow morning. My plane leaves in the evening." I say softly._

_She nods against my forehead and I open my eyes a crack to stare in hers for a moment. Her eyes are guarded and I sigh and kiss her forehead against before pulling back. "Goodnight, Alice." I say softly._

_She nods and turns to open her door. When she closes it I lower the window remembering something. "Alice." I call out leaning over the empty seat to look at her. She turns. "Yeah?" She asks snifling a bit, she's going to cry once she enters her room._

_"The girls in the locker room were wrong, just so you know." I say and don't wait for a response when I put the car in reverse and reverse my way out of the driveway. I'm being a jerk I know but, she wanted an answer._

_Then I look at my jacket flung against the seat, the envelope in my poket has been burning a hole in it since this morning._

_~End flashback~_

I shake my head at the memory and frown. I didn't tell her I loved her, I didn't kiss her goodnight. Shit, I'm the worst girlfriend ever. I sigh and walk out of the study turning off the lights with it. I walk over to the music area and grab my phone from the top of the piano.

Zero missed calls. I frown and sit down on the piano bench and look out the window. I should have given her a kiss at the least. Just a kiss goodnight…. Hey… I got an idea. I smile, I'm fixing this fight.

I flip my phone over and call Alice's house. It rings three times before someone picks it up. "Cullen Residence." I deep motherly tone greets. I sigh, thank god. "Hello, Esme. It's me Bella." I say. "Oh, Bella dear. How are you, we missed you for dinner tonight." She says.

I grimace riiiight… I was supposed to have dinner with Alice's family tonight. I shrug. "I had a business call. I'm sorry I missed it." I say politely. "No worry's dear. Now, what can I help you with?" She asks.

I smile. She knows I don't wish to talk to Alice, because I would have called her cell phone. Smart woman. " Well, I was actually wondering if you could help me surprise Alice this evening." I say.

There's a soft laugh. "You don't say, what kind of surprise?" She asks. I frown a bit. "Well, we sorta got in a fight today and well I just wanted to apologize but, I know that if I show up she will just slam the door on my face." I say.

Esme laughs. "Yes, she does have quiet the temper. What did you have in mind for an apology?" She says. I smile again, she doesn't ask why we faught or blames me. She's completely neutral and I adore Alice's mother.

"Well, if it didn't bother you or Carlisle I was planning on-"

**Apov.**

I stare blankly at the sketch pad in front of me. I have been doing this for around… ten minutes? Maybe more. I sigh and throw the sketch pad to the floor and lean back on my bed.

Bella, you are such a jerk… but so am I. I had no right to call Bella a child and call her out on closing up. I knew Bella was a guarded person since the day I met her… so, why did I pressure her?

Because I'm a jerk? But, she doesn't see the way girls flirt with her. Sure she doesn't flirt back or anything but it still pisses me off. I mean really, I'm her girlfriend, I'm right next to her. Can't you just back the hell up?

I groan and sit back on the bed staring at my celing. Just then theres a knock on my door. "Come in." I say not moving. The door opens slowly and I turn my head to see Esme enter the room with a confused look on her face as she holds roses and a note.

"Some man just dropped this off for you, it doesn't have a name. So I'm just hoping its from Bella." She says walking over to the bed and hands it to me. I sit up and look at the rose, it's a bright red and I sniff it and the scent of rose peddles assaults my nose. I chuckle a bit but frown.

Who sent me this? Wouldn't Bella write her name on it? I look at the card on my other hand. Just a white envelope. Esme excuses herself with a smile on her lips and I frown and shrug. I guess she thinks their from Bella.

I look at the note again, they have to be from Bella. Who else would send me a note and roses? I shrug and open the card.

'Eyes shine like two starts and a smile that out shines the moon. Go outside so that I can show you how much I love you.' It reads in Bella's elegant script. Yup, its from Bella. I frown. "Go outside?" I ask myself as I stand up from my bed and head over to the balcony door.

As soon as I take a step outside a guitar starts to play. A guitar, I notice and I take two more steps and gasp at what I see. Bella in my backyard, a candle formed heart with Bella playing a guitar in the center of it.

She looks in my eyes and smiles before she starts singing in her soft honey like tone, I love when she sings. I love her voice its so soothing.

_**Lying here with you so close to me**_

_**It's hard to fight these feelings when it feels so hard to breathe**_

_**Caught up in this moment**_

_**Caught up in your smile**_

_**I've never opened up to anyone**_

_**So hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms**_

_**We don't need to rush this**_

_**Let's just take it slow**_

_**Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight**_

_**Just a touch of the fire burning so bright**_

_**No, I don't wanna mess this thing up**_

_**I don't wanna push too far**_

_**Just a shot in the dark that you just might**_

_**Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life**_

_**So baby I'm alright**_

_**With just a kiss goodnight**_

_**I know that if we give this a little time**_

_**It'll only bring us closer to the love we wanna find**_

_**It's never felt so real**_

_**No it's never felt so right**_

_**Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight**_

_**Just a touch of the fire burning so bright**_

_**No, I don't wanna mess this thing up**_

_**I don't wanna push too far**_

_**Just a shot in the dark that you just might**_

_**Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life**_

_**So baby I'm alright**_

_**With just a kiss goodnight**_

_**No I don't want to say goodnight**_

_**I know it's time to leave, but you'll be in my dreams**_

_**Tonight**_

_**Tonight**_

_**Tonight**_

_**Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight**_

_**Just a touch of the fire burning so bright**_

_**No, I don't wanna mess this thing up**_

_**I don't wanna push too far**_

_**Just a shot in the dark that you just might**_

_**Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life**_

_**So baby I'm alright **_

_**Ooooh, let's do this right, **_

_**Just a kiss goodnight**_

_**With a kiss goodnight**_

_**Kiss goodnight**_

Her voice soft as honey almost taking that dream quality finishes the song. She takes a deep breath and smiles up at me. "I forgot to give you a kiss goodnight." She says smiling up at me.

I'm frozen, she did not just. She didn't just do this. My heart is thudding in my chest and legs feel weak. "If you come down here, I think I might be able to give it to you." She says smiling at me.

My brain decides to work just then and storm back into my room and I run down the stairs. The whole family is watching Bella from the glass doors leading to the back. I storm past them not even giving them a smile before I'm in the back yard and Bella is looking up at the balcony and then her eyes shift to me.

She smiles slightly and places the guitar on the ground and motions me over. I walk over with shaky legs and once in the middle of the candle formed heart Bella speaks. "I was a jerk to you today and I'm sorry. Alice, I was just scared about some rumor that has been running around about my father and I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't want to worry you, I'm sorry. I should have told you but… how can I tell you something when I still don't know how to face the truth." She says to me.

I frown. "What do you mean?" I ask. She shakes her head. "That your right, I was acting like a scared little kid. I should have just faced it and tell you what was going on but I couldn't face it if you looked at me the same way people in school do Alice… I couldn't see that pity in your eyes because that would have killed me." She says looking in my eyes.

I frown and step forward to cup her face in my hand. "Bella, I have never pitied you. What would make you think I would now?" I ask. She frowns and in her eyes I see a battle. "Trust me enough to be there for you, Bella." I say softly.

"There a rumor… about my dad… that he had a double life and that… he has another kid. A year or maybe a few years younger then me but, he died before I could ask him about it. So I'm still in the dark about that and… I don't know how to act because the man I knew as my father would have never done that to my family. So I'm in between accepting that my father was not the man I knew or hating the world for thinking so lowly as him." She says quietly.

Her arms wrap around my waist and pull me to her until her forehead is on mine. "But Alice, what killed me was that you thought you were only some toy for me. Haven't I told you enough how much I love you? How could you let a stupid comment like that mess with your head? Can you see that the only reason I have left for living is you? Haven't I showed you in every way, shape or form that you are the only person that can ever hold my heart?" She asks me.

Her voice is needy, she needs the answers and I frown. I know all of this is true. "You have." I say softly. She holds me tighter against her body. "Then why do you keep doubting me? Doubting that I love you with everything that I have?" She asks me softly. Her voice is pained and I want to cry just knowing I caused it.

"I don't. I just doubt that I'm not enough to hold you to me." I say softy. Her sad eyes lock into mine and she cups my face with one hand and I drop one hand from her face and cradle her neck.

"Your hold on me is forever, never doubt that." She says and with that she kisses me. I kiss her back sweetly. Showing her how much I love her while she does the same. I can feel the emotion pouring off my Bella as she holds me.

She loves me, she loves me and I act like an idiot. I knot a hand in her hair and she moans in to the kiss and pulls me impossibly closer. "I love you." She says when she breaks apart from the kiss for a moment. I mimicked her. "I love you too." I say and kiss her again.

Then there's a flash and we both freeze and break apart to look next to us to see… Esme. With a camera smiling at us. "I'm sorry dears but it was to adorable. First make up after a fight." She says smiling.

Bella chuckles. "Thank you again Esme." She says and I look between her and mom. "YOU knew?" I ask her. She nods. "I helped her form the heart." She says smiling. I laugh and hug Bella to me.

Just then Carlisle walks out and puts an arm around mom's waist. "So." Dad speaks. "Bella told us… or well... begged us really to let you go with her to Paris for the weekend." Dad says smiling.

I look up at Bella to see her looking at my dad. I look back and raise an eyebrow. "You can go." He says and I jump out of Bella's arms and to mom and dad and hug them and kiss them.

I jump up and down and then I look back to see Bella. She's staring at the floor a small smile on her lips. I jump over to her and hug her. "Can you believe it? We're going to Paris!" I squeal to her. She laughs and smiles brightly. "Shouldn't you start packing your bag? Oh, and don't worry. We're gong on an Alice shopping spree in Paris so I bet your coming back with three more suitcases." She chuckles.

I gap at her. "Bella." I say in shock and she shrugs. "It's paris Alice, how can I take you there and not pay for a shopping spree?.. or two." She says chuckling. I gap and hug her. "My god, I love you." I say to her. She laughs and hugs me back.

My parents laugh. "That's cute but." Mom says and I groan. "Nooo, no buts." I whine. Mom laughs. "Yes, buts. The only but is you need to apply yourself more young lady." Mom says.

I smile and nod. "I will, oh, I swear I'll get straight A's this semester." I promise before squealing and jumping in Bella's arms. She laughs in my ear. I grab her hand and pull her to the house. "I need to pack. Help me pack." I say to her. She chuckles and follows me.

Once we get to my room I close the door and pin her against it and kiss her. Bella freezes for a moment before kissing me back after a few minutes she pulls away to gasp for air. "Wow…. What was… that for?" She asks with a smile still panting.

"That was for being the best girlfriend in the world, and because I love you." I say hugging her. She hugs me back and kisses the top of my head. "I love you, too." She says kissing the top of my head. "I loved the song but… I don't only just want a kiss goodnight…. I want all of you." I say in her ear before kissing her beneath her ear and she shudders.

She wraps an arm around me waist and and walks over to the bed. "You know what the best thing after a fight is?" She ask in my ear. I shake my head and she grins "Make up sex." She whispers in my ear before attacking my neck.

**A/N: Loved this chapter? And! Next chapter is a lemon! Can they keep quiet? Let's find out! Review!**


	30. Chapter 30

_**A/N: wow! Who would have ever thought I would publish a story with 30chps and more to come? Its… shocking. I love the reactions I'm getting from you guys keep it up. Review' are always encouraged because they make me smile.**_

_**TOTAL LEMON, IF YOU DO NOT LIKE IT, DO NOT READ IT AND SKIP TO NEXT CHAPTER.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**_

_**Ch.30**_

_**Apov**_

Bella kissed my neck pinning me against my bed. One hand holding my hands above my head the other roaming my body. She finally lets it rest on my hip where she slides it ever so slowly under my shirt as she manages to pull my thighs apart so that she's in between my legs.

I thrust against her lower half and her a quiet grunt escape her. "Alice baby, we need to stay quiet." She says to my neck as she quickly takes my shirt off and hovers over me. I nod and look in her eyes as they rake up my body.

"Fuck." She mumbles softly as she drags me to the center of the bed and rolls off me to go to the door. "You would be surprised how many times this happens." She mumbles as she clicks the look on my door.

She looks around my room before marching over to the closet and I just stay there on the bed wondering why the fuck she isn't making me moan right now? She opens the door and grabs a handful of clothes and places them in different places before getting my suitcase out and throwing a bunch of clothes in it and leaving it open.

Oh, I know what she's doing. She's staging the scene just in case we need to stop what were doing. After she seems pleased with that she opens my drawers and shuffles things around as if I was looking for something.

She stops for a moment while rearranging my drawers and I think I hear her curse before she stands from there and walks to my radio and I suppress my sigh, can't she just hurry up and fuck me? I mean sure, I accused her half heartedly that I didn't want sex today but I was lying. When would I not want to have sex with my incredibly sexy girlfriend?

She flips it on and music starts to play and she raises the volume to an un-obnoxious volume before looking around the room and walking back to my dresser. She smirks at me as she lower her hand in my underwear drawer.

I blush and gasp in mortification as Bella pulls out my vibrator. She smirks fully and walks over to me and hovers over me with the vibrator still in front of her eyes. She lowers her head to speak to me.

"Alice, Alice, Alice. You've been a busy girl haven't you. Isn't having sex with me four times a week enough for you?" She asks me in a condescending tone. I shiver a bit when her hot breath hits my neck.

I gulp in some air. "It is." I speak and she chuckles against my neck. "Hmm… then tell me. What do you use this for?" She asks and as to prove a point flips the vibrator on and places it against my stomach.

A soft moan escapes me and she chuckles again. "Can this peice of plastic make you scream and cuss the way I make you?" She asks trailing kisses against my neck. I'm about to answer when she pinches one of my nipples from above the material and I yelp.

She quickly un-fastens my bra and smiles before kissing my lips and pulls back. "Stay quiet." She says before slowly kissing her way down my neck to my chest where she stops right in the middle of my breasts. She looks up at me and looking in my eyes she takes my left nipple in her mouth, I can't help the gasp as the amazing feeling of Bella's mouth on me starts to set in. She quickly switches breast and I shudder in pleasure when Bella presses the damn vibrator against my nipple while its still on.

"Fuck, I need you Alice. I need to feel you cum for me." She says in my ear and as soon as the words leave her mouth my gut clenches in anticipation. She un-fastens my pants button and zipper and pull my pants down only to stop and whimper. I grin, I had gone commando today.

"Please tell me you just changed into nothing." She says in almost a whimper. I shake my head and lean forward to whisper in her ear. "I've been wearing nothing all day just for you baby." I say and take her earlobe into my mouth.

Bella moans softly and I gasp when I feel the vibrator make its way slowly to my center running down from my breast to my stomach to my clit. When its there Bella kisses my lips and I kiss her back as she slowly trails it up and down teasing me.

I whimper into Bella's mouth as she pushes the tip in and then out. I moan softly when her free hand goes to my breast. "Bella… please." I moan out when her mouth breaks free from mine and she goes to my neck.

"Please what?" She asks as if it were a normal conversation and I wasn't laying under her bare. My hand that was tangled in the sheet under me goes to her neck to make her look in my eyes. "Make love to me." I say and Bella's eyes glaze over in a lustful haze.

Without a second movement she pushes the vibrator in to my already soking core. My yell is muffled by her mouth. She pulls back and speaks to my ear as she angels herself so that she can squat down to watch what she's doing. "Shhh… we wouldn't want anyone to hear you now would we?" She asks before pulling it out almost completely and plunging it back in. I moan into my fist and Bella whimpers when my leg brushes against her crotch while she's still pumping.

"God, Alice. Damn it." She mumbles as she feels my wetness seep off the toy and to her palm. "So much for a damn toy?" She growls in my ear. I moan as she bites my neck and whimper when it suddenly pulled out of me.

Before I can miss it to much Bella pushes two fingers into me and curls on the way out and I arch my back holding on to a yelled moan in my throat. Bella is pumping furiously into me while mumbling in my ear now.

"Can a toy make you feel like this?" She asks as she to prove her point pushes a third finger into me making me gasp in the pure bliss of her fingers working on me. I open my mouth but only a long moan escapes and Bella just nibbles on my neck.

"Word's Beautiful. We've been over this." She says before changing her rythum in me. I falter in a breath. "No… only you. Oh, god. Right there baby." I moan out. I feel Bella's chuckle. "Alice…. Do you want me to make love to you, or fuck you senseless?" She asks seductively in my ear.

My mind falters for a moment at the feeling Bella evokes on me. She's straddling one of my thighs and grinding herself on me. I finaly look at her from under my lust haze and she that she still has her clothes on.

I go to reach for her breast but she maneuvers out of it. "Right now is all about you, baby. Take care of me later." She says and before I can apose Bella smirks down at me and with her other hand brings the vibrator to my clit.

"Oh, fuck. Oh god." I moan out before biting my lip. Bella leans down to look in my eyes and smirks. "God, can't save you here." She says and I feel my center throb at her words. She smirks haven felt me clench around her fingers.

"Like when I talk like that?" She teases seductively and I can only nod as I pant as her working fingers never stop. I know what she's doing, she can have me in an orgasm in close to nothing but she's spacing things out. She's going to build up my climax and I shudder in anticipation.

I clench around her fingers again and she moans this time before placing her head on my shoulder. "Fuck, your so tight and wet. Fuck, all the things I want to do to you." She rasps out thrusting her fingers into me almost furiously making me moan out.

She nibbles at my neck. "Alice, do you want to get caught? Please try and stay as quiet as possible." She says but hits my stop again only making me moan a tight one that makes me arch under her.

"Shit, Alice. Your dripping. Is this all for me?" She asks kissing my neck with open mouth kisses that drive me crazy. "Yes." I rasp out in a gasp and I feel her grin against my neck. "Good." She says before hitting my stop again.

I bite my lip to hold in the moan and Bella curls her fingers in me. I start to feel the tingling in my legs and the fire flickering in my core. Bella seems to feel this and starts to hit my stop with trusts deep long and curling on the way out until I'm right on the edge.

"So.. ughh.. close. Baby, please." I whimper out to Bella. Its feeling so good its almost painful. "Not yet." She says lowly in my ear. I whimper trying to fight it off. "Bella." I moan out. "Not yet." She says in my ear and then she's kneeling right in front of me.

And at the same time she delivers the final thrust she sucks on my clit then speaks againt it. "Cum for me." The vibrations of her voice pushing me over the edge. Her free hand comes to cover my mouth as I moan rather loudly as I fall apart. I spasm and buck against Bella's face as she takes her fingers out of me and starts lapping up my juices.

My brian flicks off for a moment in sensory over load of the greatest as I ride wave after wave of pleasure from Bella. My eyes had fallen closed a long time ago at the beginning of my climax and after another moment my eyes open up lazily and the first thing I see is Bella's head in between my legs.

"Baby." I more or less whisper out but only to be responded by Bella's soft moan as she licks my folds. "God, you taste so good." She moans out before licking me again a few times before stoping to place an open mouth kiss on my clit before laying down next to me and placing her fingers in her mouth.

An idea struck from the first time me and Bella had sex. She pulled my fingers out of my mouth to taste herself. So with nothing more then a look at her I pull her fingers out of her mouth and suck them into my own.

Still leaving my eyes connected with hers. She freezes when I place her fingers in my mouth but her eyes cloud with lust as she watches and feels me sucking myself from her fingers. I hum around her fingers actually liking my taste and before I know it Bella pulls her fingers slowly from my lips and licks her own.

"That, was hands down one of the sexiest things I have ever seen." She says cupping my cheek and running a thumb over my bottom lip her eyes not moving from my lips. Her voice is huskier then usual and didn't go un-noticed by me.

I smile down at her and slowly trail my hand from her waist to the front of her jeans. I slowly un-do the button and run my finger over the zipper cherishing the look of total want in Bella's face.

Her eyes fell closed the moment I moved my hand and I smirk to myself a bit. She's so riled up right now. I slowly slide her zipper down and instead of pulling her pants down I slide my hand in over her panties. I gasp a bit at how wet she is and run a firm finger from bottom to top.

I feel her shudder and I see her breathing go raged again. I lean forward so that my mouth brushes acrost her ear as I speak. "Bella are you wet for me?" I ask running yet another finger over her panty clad crotch.

Bella goes to open her mouth but stops and thrust against my hand. "Fuck." She moans. I smile to myself and move her panties to the side and run a finger threw her wetness. "Words Bella." I tease like she does to me and I feel her thrust against my hand again brushing her clit against my palm.

"Fuck, yes." She rasps out, her eyes clenched and her jaw as well as she consentrates on the feelings. I learned quickly that Bella likes to savor the feelings until there so good they almost hurt. I had teased her of being a masochist but she had corrected me. She just relishes every single wave of pleasure.

"What do you want me to do to you?" I ask against licking the shell of her ear and feeling her shudder above me. I use my other hand to slide under her shirt and un-clasp her sleeveless bra. I pull it out and throw it to the corner of the bed and cup her from under her shirt.

I squeeze her warm and large breast in my hand feeling the nipple harden under my hand. Bella moans as I start to tease her entrance with my finger only slidding in the tip of it before pulling it out. "Fuck, don't tease me." Bella growls out. I smirk to her. "I thought you liked it when I teased you." I remind her slipping one finger in her and leaving it still as she moans.

"Damn, Alice baby. You already know what to do." She pleads to me in want. I smirk to myself evily. "I want to hear you say it." I say to her ear and she thrusts against my hand and whimpers.

I know I'm driving her crazy, the want in her to get a release must be almost painful now but I know she likes this. If I didn't I would have caved long ago. I also know she loves dirty talk.

She clenches her jaw and pulls her face away to look in my eyes her glazed eyes burning in to mine. "I want you to fuck me." She says to me. She clenches around my lone finger and I smirk. "What if I don't?" I ask slowly extracting my finger from her center.

"You're going to." She says pushing her hips against my hand and my finger once again sliding deep into her and Bella moans in pleasure. I chuckle to myself at Bella's demand and I smile at her. "Fine, Bella. I'll fuck you." I say and I feel Bella shudder in anticipation.

"But, remember one thing." I say lowly to her. She looks in my eyes and I smirk a bit to myself as I lean in to kiss her. "Keep quiet." I say and push two fingers into her fully and hear her moan into my mouth. She whimpers when I curl them and plung back into her.

"Fuck… oh, damn. So good." She pants as I thrust deeply into her. After three more thrusts I add another finger and kiss her to muffle her moan. "Shhh." I remind her when I break the kiss and Bella bites her lip before hiding her head in my neck as she groans and thrust against my hand.

I place my thumb against her clit and start to move it as I squeeze the hand on Bella's breast and she whimpers in my neck. "God, Ali." She moans and I smirk. "He can't help you now." I quote her and she thrust against my hand and pulls her head back to smirk at me. "Who said I wanted him to?" She asks me before kissing my lips. I manage to flip us over and straddle Bella's thigh.

I kiss her back and never stop the movements of my hands on her body. Bella by far is way quieter then me, I'm guessing she has had to be on some occasions and it only spurs me on to make her yell or moan loudly.

Finally I remember the toy Bella used on me and I slide my hand off Bella's breast and continue to kiss her neck as I pump in and out of her. With my now free hand I feel around for the toy and I nibble on Bella's neck when I feel her hum.

"Your not going… to find it." She rasp out and I pull away from her neck to look in her face that even when her eyes closed her lips are smirking as she pushes forcefully against my fingers inside of her.

"I won't?" I ask panting. She smirks and shakes her head before gasping when I pinch her clit with my free hand and her eyes clench and she moans. "Where is it, Bella?" I ask slowly slowing down my frantic pace on her center.

"Fuck, don't stop." Bella moans out to me when she feels me loosen my pace. "I'm so close. Don't." She says in pants and I smirk. "Where is it?" I ask and push in deep into her and I feel her clench around me.

She shakes her head and I push in deeper again and she arches her back her head falls back against my pillow and she grunts. "Bella, I want to fuck you with my goddamn vibrator. Now where the fuck is it?" I ask cusing, knowing Bella loves dirty talk.

She clenches around me and I smirk, my dirty little girl. "Fuck, under.. the ughh.. pillow." She rasps out and I quickly reach with my free hand under the pillow and touch the toy.

I pull it out and quickly turn it on silken it up against her folds before quickly in one pump replacing it with my fingers and it pushes her over the edge. She spasms and gasp before a long hard moan muffled by my mouth leaves her lips.

I pump the toy in her a few times ridding out her orgasm and after she stops spasaming I take it out and flip it off before using it like a lollipop and licking it. I feel Bella's hand around my wrist as she pulls the toy away from my mouth.

She rubs it against my core and then places it in between our lips I don't need her to say it before we both start to lick the toy clean. Our juices mixed together until its clean and Bella kisses me.

We stay kissing for a long moment until she pulls away a happy smile on her face. "Best make up sex ever." She says leaning her head back on the pillow. I giggle and cuddle to her side and Bella runs a lazy hand behind my back until she stops and quickly zips up her pants and puts her hair in a ponytail.

Her eyes land on me. "Get dressed." She says and I frown but quickly side into my clothes again and go to the bathroom and run my hand through some water and run them through my hair to pull it back.

Just then there's a knock on my door and Bella quickly answers it as I walk out of the bathroom. "Alice, we came to give you your passport." Mom says smiling at me and Bella discretely sits back down on the bed and smiles before I see her slip the green vibrator in her jacket pocket.

"Um, thanks." I say and walk over to mom and grab my passport before throwing it on my dresser. Mom frowns and looks around the room and her eyes land on my suitcase. "Having trouble packing, dear?" Mom asks. From behind her I see Bella smirk and I stiff a giggle.

Bella saves me. "She sure is, Esme. She can't decide wether to pick her elegant clothes and what color. Honestly I've never seen her like this. She's so indecisive." Bella says with a hint of a smirk until my mother turns around to meet her and Bella is frowning.

Mom laughs. "She's torturing you isn't she?" She asks and I gasp at Bella's grin. "She sure is." She says her eyes flashing to mine. Mom laughs softly. "She's always like this before a trip. But about that, Bella. I would like to ask about sleeping arrangements." She says.

Bella nods and smiles. "Already taken care of, Esme. Her room is going to be separate and don't worry. My guardian will be with us in the hotel master suite. After all, it is under his name. We will have separate rooms, I can write down the hotels and his number if you wish to speak with him about sleeping arrangements." She says seriously.

Mother smiles at Bella. "I would love to, not that I don't trust you Bella. But you can't help but to worry when it comes to your children." Mom says. Bella's smile falters a bit but she quickly fixes it and nods. "Of course, Esme. I'll have those numbers for you before I leave for the night." She says.

Mom beams at Bella and turns to me. "She's a keeper." She says with a wink and I grin. "She sure is." I say walking over to her and kissing her cheek. Mom sighs. "To be young and in love." She swoons before leaving the room.

We chuckle at my moms antics and I look in Bella's eyes. "Don't worry baby, she didn't mean anything about the kid's comment." I say to her. Bella's shoulders slump and she nods against my neck. "I know, its not a big deal. So… I'm a keeper?" Bella's asks.

I chuckle and pull away from her and kiss her lips softly. "You sure are." I say and Bella smiles. I frown. "We really don't have separate rooms do we?" I ask. She shakes her head. "Of course not, oh, and my guardian will be on the floor under us. Just so you know." She says with a wink.

I laugh and pull away and skip to my closet. "What to choose, what to choose." I ponder. I hear Bella groan. "Anything, nothing. I really couldn't care. I'm planning on having you undressed in my bed everynight. And the only three times we will be out is when I take you shopping and the night of the charity." She says to me while hugging me by the waist into her warm body.

I lean and relax iin to her. "Hmm, can't wait." I sigh and tilt my head to kiss Bella under the jaw. "The city of love… that's all I'm planning on doing to you. All night, everything. When we get back here you won't be able to walk straight." She says huskily in my ear and I shudder.

"Behave." I mumble against her jaw before pecking it and dragging Bella into my walk in closet and pinning her against a rack. "So much for behaving." She mumbles. "Shut it and feel me." I say against her lips and she bites mine and pulls away.

"Don't you mean fuck me?" She asks againt my neck. I shake my head. "Not yet, that's for tonight at your place." I say and she stops. "Your sleeping over?" She asks. I smirk a bit. "I kinda told my parents that our flight left at seven… I just didn't tell them what seven and so I'm planning on having our flight delayed." I say against her lips.

She grins. "I'm so corrupting you." She says and I nod "Fuck yes you are. And I love you for it." I say as I push her against yet another rack and cupping both her breast in my hands. "Shit, Alice." She moans and I lean forward to kiss her lips.

She takes a few steps and we bump into another shelf, this time my back is the one that hits it and I'm pinned against it. "Dammit, I love when your horny for me." She says against my lips as she grinds against me.

"Always am, baby. FUCK… only you." I say to her as she lifts me to straddle her waist and my mouth is welded to hers. She pins me against a wall and pushes against me, "Baby, get anything. I swear. Anything. I'll buy you a fucking mall if you pack that damn suitcase and go to my house." She promises me.

I kiss her back harshly, "Fuck, I can't move. I want you so bad." I say to her. She pushes against my hips again our clits brushing and we moth moan and she fists a hand in my hair and brings my face to look at her. "You. Will. Pack. And. Fuck me. In. My. House. And. In. My. Bed." She growls at me pushing against my hips ever single time she finishes a word and extra long when she said 'fuck me.'

I moan into her mouth and she lets go of my legs and I slide to the ground. I kiss her wildly before pulling away from her and grabbing a hand full of my favorite brand clothes and shoes. "I'll buy you clothes, just put random shit in there baby. Just put in five outfits, were buying your dress in Paris." She says kissing my neck.

I nod and drop the clothes I have in my hands when I remember I had picked out specific outfits for Paris. And their in a corner of the closet. I smirk and go to them and empty out my suitcase before laying them in there and kneeling over the suitcase to my underwear drawer were I take out a bag of Victoria Secret underwear I bought for the special nights. I grab some normal underwear and throw in my bag of make up, hair products and grab my tooth bush and normal brush, oh and shoes!. After I made sure to throw that in.

I kneel in all fours as I try to close the suitcase when I feel Bella's body cover mine. "Fuck, I never thought about this position." She mumbles as her hands travel from my shoulders to my back to my breast and all the way to my hips were she pushes them against her own.

"You know, I have a few toys of my own I really like to use." She says in my ear and I shudder and quickly zip the suitcase closed and Bella bucks her hips against mine in a teasing manner. "We're not done yet." She whispers in my ear as she stands up and grabs my suitcase in her hands and walks to the door leaving me completely dazed.

I take a quick breath and shake my head as I get up and look around my room. I have everything I think I need, I grab my wallet and house keys and walk over to the radio where I shut if off and walk out of my room and turn of the light.

I smirk, tonight is going to be fun.

**A/N: Well, you guys decide, next chapter fluff? Or do I just skip to them in Paris and flash back to this night? Review and you will decide! God, I love a teasing Bella.**


	31. Chapter 31

_**A/N: well the people voted so this chapter is also fluffy, again if you don't like fluffy wait it out cuz next chapter is Paris!... which also has a bit of fluff in it I think Paris is going to be at least 4 chapters long. Maybe more, I don't know.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!... sad I know.**_

_**Ch.31**_

_**Bpov**_

I walk down the stairs slowly with my face discretely masked as traumatized. Once I reach the foyer I place the bags there and go to the living room were the siblings are at. "Hahahaha, what's the matter Bells?" Emmett asks.

I plop down on the love seat. "Alice… clothes… so many clothes." I mumble in fake shock. The siblings erupt in laughter and I join them. "Yeah, she's traumatized but I'm not sure its about clothes." Alice says as she walks in with a grin and sits down in my lap.

I hug her around the waist and pinch her sides. "Why you little pixie." I say. She giggles and Rosalie laughs. "Ohh… let me guess. Music and locking the doors?" Rose asks me.

I laugh, we often joke about our sexual activities with the family seeing as Jazz and Edward are like rabbits on crack and Rose and Em can't keep their hand off each other. I grin. "You know me so well, you just forgot the clothes scattered around the room to make it look like an Alice tornado." I say leaning forward and grabbing some grapes from the bowl and eating one and placing one in Alice's mouth.

They laugh and I chuckle at Alice's face, she's actually blushing. God, I love this shy girl. I snuggle my head in her neck and kiss her there and pull back with a wink. "Well, we must go. Our plain leaves at seven." I say and stand up with Alice in my arms.

Emmett, Jazz and Edward laugh and Rosalie rolls her eyes at Alice's un-happy struggle. "Why is it that this girl is so light, its like she has hallowed out bones." I joke rocking her like a baby.

Emmett booms out a laugh and I wink at Alice and whisper in her ear. "I like having you in my arms baby… especially when your climaxing." I say to her and quickly lick the shell of her ear and she shudders and I shift her so that she is standing.

"Bye, guys. See you Tuesday night." She says going over to them and giving them a hug and kiss each. I smile at them, siblings don't seem so bad. This got my thinking about that rumor, I shake my head and push the thought aside. I'm an only child and my father would never do that to us.

With a smile I turn my head in time to see Alice dancing over to me. I wrap her in my arms and kiss her forehead and look at her siblings. "Take care of her for us. Alright Bell?" Emmett ask seriously.

I smile and nod. "With my life." I say and he grins and nods. Rosalie and the rest come over here and before I know it I'm in the mist of a group hug. I stiffen for a moment not used to having people hug me.

Alice feeling my stiffness kisses under my jaw and I slowly relax in to the hug and they pull away. Emmett ruffles my hair and I snap my teeth at his hand and he takes a step back. "Alice, watch out for that one. She's a bitter." He says.

I smirk and Alice giggles. "Don't I know it." She says and I gasp out a laugh and so do the rest of the room. With a chuckle I give them my signature two finger salute and walk out to the foyer.

"Where are your parents? You should say goodbye to them too." I say to her. She nods and calls out. "Mom, Dad! We're leaving." She calls out. "Be righ there." I hear Esme call back from the kitchen.

I walk over and grab Alice's suitcases and place them by the door just as Carlisle and Esme appear hand in hand. "I'm going to miss you honey." Esme says hugging Alice and Carlisle joining the hug.

I lean back against the wooden door and study Alice and her parents carefully. Carlisle's stiff posture and serious yet kind face scream military. But… his eyes are so, calm. There not haunted like my fathers were. I shake my head and trail my eyes to the chandaler on the celing of the loft and wait for them to exchange goodbyes.

Just then I feel a strong hand on my arm and I quickly side step it and look up to see… Carlisle's shocked expression. I quickly relax my stance and apologize. "Im sorry, Sir. I just.. you caught me off guard." I say looking at his eyes. His eyes study me for a moment, probably verifying if I was any danger.

He merely nods to me and his eyes become once again warm and his face relaxes. I give him my crooked smile and give him a nod. "I just wanted to tell you, thank you for taking Alice with you. It was very generous of you to offer taking her to Paris." He says slowly walking us to the corner of the loft.

I shrug. "Not a big deal, I just wanted Alice too see a bit of the world." I say giving him a small smile. Carlisle nods. "Yes, well. I can see that. I just wanted to thank you and ask of you one small favor." He asks.

I'm wary but I nod. "Sure." I say. He gives me a kind smile. "Just, take care of her. She was very distraught when she came home. And a part of me is worried you are a bit serious about each other but, I can also understand that you can't fight off love. So, I just ask of you to take care of her." He says.

I smile kindly at him. "Of course sir, she's very important to me. It is never my intention to make her un-happy, quite the opposite really." I say. He laughs softly and pats my shoulder and with that we walk back to the center of the room were the whole Cullen clan is at.

Alice quickly wraps her arms around my waist once I get back and her father winks at her. "Bella, dear. I wish you a safe trip, I hope you two have fun. Alice, don't forget to call me every morning and night." Esme says sternly. Alice nods and I take a piece of paper from my pocket and hand it to Esme.

"The numbers you requested, Esme." I say extending the paper to her hand. She gives me a smile and I smile back and she pulls me and Alice into a hug. I stiffen again but slowly relax into it and hug her a little bit awkwardly.

I say my goodbyes and with a two fingered salute I leave with Alice to my car. We drive quickly to my house and once there I close the door and pin Alice agianst the door as I kiss her. "God, I thought they… would never… let us… leave." I say in between kisses.

Alice nods against my lips as she unzips my jacket to find me in only my bra. She grins and I grind down at her as she starts to kiss my neck and down to my chest where she un-clasps it and throws it to the ground.

I quickly take off her shirt and bra and pull her chest to mine and saver the feeling of her chest against mine. "God, I want you." I growl out to her neck. Alice just moans in response and I whimper when I think that my bed is on the third floor.

"Baby… not here…. My bed." I say as Alice grinds on me. I stiff a moan/grunt and without further warning I lift Alice up so that she locks on my hips and I slowly make my way up the stairs with my girlfriend as a backpack.

She continues to kiss my neck and rub her chest against my own and thankfully we reach the third floor to my room. I pin her against my door and open it and leave it wide open as I walk to my bed and drop her on it.

Alice sprawled across my bed never ceases to turn me the fuck on. I quickly take off my pants and she does the same and I'm quickly stradling her small waist rubbing my center on her's as best I can while I kiss her.

Alice moans loudly and I grind against her again. "Moan for me, Alice." I say in her ear as I thrust a finger in her. She moans and I can't help the smirk that crosses my face at giving her pleasure. It's to sexy for words.

I kiss her lips chastly and pump my hand in and out while my thumb works on her clit. I want her to have a quick orgasm because the rest of them, I'm going to draw out as long as I can.

I hit her spot repeatedly with deep quick pumps of my hand until I feel her walls clench around my fingers as I curl them out. Just to pump them back in. I smirk again and kiss her breast and suck one into my mouth and I pump my hand again and Alice breathing hitches a moan/grunt.

"Dose this feel good baby?" I ask pumping my fingers. "Ohh, Yes, god yesss… Don't stop." She moans out. I kiss her breast again and grin. "Do you like this, what do you want baby?" I ask as I pump in and out again moaning myself when I feel her clench around me again.

Shit, she is so tight and dripping. Fuck, this girl is going to make me die. I push my fingers in deeper as I hear her moan out. "Yes, god, yes…. Go faster baby…. Harder." She begs of me and how can I not comply?

I slide in a third finger and pump in quickly and harder but carefully not to hurt her. "Shit, ohhh god. Ohh…" I hear her say as she bites her lip, her chest rising and falling in pants of pure extecy.

She's hypnotizing. The way her legs are parted to give me acess to her, the way one hand is clenched on the sheets and the other in her hair as her head is tilted back and her back arched. Her hips moving to meet each of my thrusts. God, this girl is so sexy.

I lower my head until my lips are at her clit and I suck the bud into my mouth as I curl them in side of her. Her hips buck against my face and I reach out and pinch her nipple between my fingers. She arches for me and her throbbing center clenches around my fingers and I know she's right there.

"Cum for me, Alice." I say against her clit, the vibrations of my voice setting off her spasms as she falls apart by my hands. I slide my hand out and role off of her and with my free hand –the one not dripping- I reach for the night stand and open the last drawer as I look inside.

Hmm.. what to use on her? I grin and decide the starp on seeing as no guy could ever have a dick like this. I chuckle to myself as I quickly and one handedly strap it on me. I quickly use my dripping hand to lube it up and role back to Alice who is breathing evenly with her eyes closed in the middle of my bed.

I crawl to her until I'm above her again and grin as I kiss her. "Thank you." She says when I pull away from her addicting sweet lips. I smile down at her. "Anytime." I say and she goes to kiss me and I kiss her back.

I slowly, trying to hold off the smirk on my face inch my lower half and my new… 'member' closer to Alice's center. It rubs against her folds and Alice stiffens and looks down and her mouth falls open.

I suppress a chuckle as I see her mouth open and close two times before she looks at me in the eyes. Her eyes are darker again but her reasonable side is coming out "Bella…" She says warily. I roll my eyes. "Would I ever hurt you?" I ask.

She shakes her head and speaks. "You woudnt but, that toy of yours just might." She says. I laugh a little to myself and fist it in my hand "This here, is more pleasure then any man can ever give you, darling." I say to her.

She rolls her eyes. "I'm not into men." She remind me. I smirk. "Good, cause your mine. But trust me, this bad boy here has given me a lot of good mindblowing orgasms." I say giving her a wink.

Alice gulps a little un-sure and I quickly unstrap it and shrug. "Its cool, I have a few other things we can try out." I say with a shrug. I was guessing she would freak out a bit, so I didn't let it upset my mood but Alice surprised me when she took it from my hands and looked at it.

"I want to use it… on you." She says and I look in her eyes and I swear to god I felt a river go off down there. "A… are you sure?" I ask. She nods and with a chuckle of my own I help her strap it on.

My eyes travel up and down her body… shit, Alice looks hot with that thing straped to her. Alice crawls to me and I already feel my arousal. I feel my center throb a bit when it bobs against my clit and I bite my lip and look at Alice.

She looks a bit lost bitting her lip and I want to laugh at how adorable and innocent this girl really is. Shit, I'm corrupting her. "I don't know what to do exactly." She says. I try to wipe the smile of my face and kiss her lips "First… kiss me." I say brushing my hand to her hips.

She smiles at me and kisses me in a searing kiss. Shit, she's a great kisser. After a few seconds of kissing I break apart. "Touch me." I say to her as I bring her lips back to me. She grins. "Whats the magic word?" She teases and her 'member' brushes across my clit making me moan out softly

"Fucking now." I demand. She chuckles and kisses my lips. "Nope." She says against my lips and her fingertips ghost around my breasts. "Fuck." I mumble out as her member brushes against my folds slowly.

She tilts her head to kiss my neck and trails down to my chest but dosen't kiss where want her to, her breath brushes acrost my nipple and I shudder. "Please, fucking please. Touch me." I moan out craving her touch as the head of the toy slide between my folds once again but doesn'tt enter.

"Good girl." Alice says to my ear as I feel her hand slide down my sides and to my breast and the other to my neck. My eyes meet hers and I can see the mirth in her eyes. I growl a bit and crash my lips to hers. She moans into my mouth before pushing her tongue in and dominating mine. I try to roll us over and she dosen't let me.

She brings both my arms up and holds them with hers as she looks in my eyes. "Behave, Bella." She says in her sweet seductive tone that has me dripping for her. "Fuck, Alice… I need you." I moan out when her hands squeeze mine to remind me to not fight her hold.

"I…" She trails off and I snap out of my lust-filled haze. She isn't sure how to… oh. "Just push in, baby. Same basics… apply." I pant out and with a soft kiss to my lips she slowly pushes in the head.

"More." I grit out with clenched teeth as she slowly slides into me, filling me up completely and I moan longly. I let my walls adjust to the slight stretch and I move my hips against hers urging her to move her own.

"Move baby." I say and moan when she pulls out almost completely and pushes back in. I arch my back and yell out a moan of Alice's name. "Shit. That's so hot." I hear her mumble to herself as she pushes back into me.

"God, I love you." I moan out as she pushes and pulls. Every single thrust so good I can already feel the flame flickering in my core. I pant and open my eyes to see Alice looking down at our hips where she pulls out and pushes back in and moans.

"Such a good...job, baby. I'm close." I grunt out to her and Alice's head looks back up and she gives me a soft smile. She winks at me and leans forward to take my nipple back in her mouth and her free hand teases my clit.

I clench around the dildo and arch my back as Alice pumps in once more and I spasm as the wave of pleasure washes over me. Alice slows down for a few more pumps then pulls out and I try to get my breathing back to normal when I feel Alice cuddle into my side, her head under my neck.

I drape an arm around her lazily as I try to catch my barrings and turn on my brain again. "God, that was amazing baby, thank you. I love you." I say and kiss her lips sweetly. She smiles softly against my lips. "Anytime, Bella. I love you too." She says and kisses me back in a slow kiss.

I pull back and after I feel that I have a bit more energy I smirk and flip us around and un-clasp the strap-on from Alice. "That was amazing baby, but… I'm the man in this relationship." I say with a wink before strapping the thing on and kissing her lips.

She laughs against my lips. "Is that so?" She asks. I nod. "You're the one with the skirt and I'm the one with the pants." I remind her teasingly and she gasps and slaps my arm playfully. "But I set the rules honey." She says in my ear. I smirk. "Wouldn't want it any other way." I say giving her a kiss and snapping the last click on so that I can use the strap-on, on her.

I kiss her until she's leaning back on the bed and I move to her neck. "I'm going to make you feel so good, baby. When we're done, you're not going to be able to remember your name." I say teasing her neck with my lips as I lower my hand to make sure she's wet, I don't want her to hurt.

"God." I moan out and Alice moans softly when I run a finger threw her slick opening. "Yeah. You ready for me, baby?" I ask against her neck as I tease her entrance with my fingers. "Hmmm… yeah. God, baby. I want you." She moans out. I smirk a little to myself and kiss her lips.

_**Apov**_

Bella kisses my lips sweetly and I feel the head of the toy tease my entrance. I'm a bit weary seeing how big it is but Bella used it and it looks like it gave her one hell of a climax.

I shudder in excitement when I feel Bella move the toy away and stick a finger in me and I moan. "God, I need to taste you." She says and when I open my eyes she extracts the finger from in me and sticks it in her mouth and hollows out her cheeks.

I swear I drip a bit more at the sight of Bella's eyes darkening as she gazes at me. "Trust me? It's going to feel a bit weird but it's going to feel good baby." Bella says to me as she lower herself lower and settles in between my legs.

She grazes the tip threw my folds and pulls it out, teasing me. "God, Bella. Don't tease me." I moan out and she grabs my hands that tried to touch her and pin them above my head in her firm yet gentle grip.

I shudder at the sight of her hovering over me with dark eyes, she's taking back dominance. "Like what… you see?" She asks smirking. I open my mouth to retort when the head slides into me and all that comes out is a moan.

"Yeah, baby. Moan, you can yell here. I don't want you to keep quiet this time." Bella says to me as she slowly slides in half of the toy in me and I feel myself tense a bit as I get used to the stretching as my walls adjust to the thick toy in me.

Bella slides it out and pushes in gently again careful not to hurt me as she pushes it in until its fully in me. I let out a moan and I feel Bella shudder. "God, what I wouldn't give to be a man right now." I hear her grunt as she pulls out and pushes into me a bit faster. I grunt as my breath hitches and a wave of pleasure goes through me.

"Good, girl. Take it all. God your so sexy." Bella grunts out as she pushes into me again. This time she starts a nice pace that has me both moaning and wanting to rip my hands from Bella's to punch her and make her go faster.

"God, baby…. Faster.." I moan out as I raise my hips to meet each of Bella's thrusts. I hear Bella moan softly. "You like that?" She asks quickening the pace. "Ugh… yes." I gasp out and Bella smirks a little to herself and looks in my eyes with her own dark lust ones as she pushes into me.

"Look at us Alice, look at how sexy you look taking everything I'm giving you." Bella says in my ear. I shudder and my eyes close as a wave of arousal washes through me again and Bella pushes in deep and I arch my back and moan.

"Look at us Alice." Bella almost demands and I clench around the toy. God, Bella is so sexy when she is in charge. I open my eyes and look at Bella to see her gaze locked on our touching centers.

I look at us and I see the way Bella's hips move expertly almost back and forth in deep long thrust into me. I see as she pulls out almost completely and sudenly pushes completely into me when there is not space in between the two of us.

"Hmmm… feels so good." I pant out my eyes still locked on hers as she pushes in deeper in to me. She looks at me and a small smirk is playing on her lips and I lean forward a bit to kiss her lips but break the kiss in a gasp as she pulls out and rams into me and I fall back on the bed in pleasure. "Ohhh, fuck…. Baby, just like that." I moan out and I flex my hands trying to lossen Bella's grip to no use.

I feel her lean over me. "You look so sexy taking in this whole thing." She says and as if to explain she thrust in deeper. "Fuck." I say arching my back. It feels so good. She takes my earlobe in to her mouth and hums.

"Good, you like that baby?" She asks. And pushes into me again, she shifts so that she is on her knees in a better angle in between my legs and thrust. "God, yes… baby, faster." I say and she starts to pump into me.

Her pace starts speeding up and my head falls back against the pillow and I moan out. "Mmm, yeah" I moan out as she lift my leg a little and slides in deeper still. "Oh, fuck." I moan when she pulls back almost completely and slams into me.

She continues her quick pumping pace. "Harder." I moan out and she releases my arms -which I quickly wound around her head as she slides her arms under my shoulders- and in the only way I can describe it is her pounding into me. I moan and my hips buck to meet the thrusts.

"Come on, baby. Take it, come on, all of it. Your such a good girl, taking it all. God, baby." I hear Bella grunt out from above me and I feel myself clench around her. "So close." I grit out and Bella continues to pound into me. She lifts my leg a bit higher and pounds into me again and my back arches.

"Bellaaa." I moan out as she kisses my neck and pushes into me deep her chest coming in contact with mine as she leans forward to kiss my neck as she pumps into me. "Alice, come on baby. Just like that, yes. God, baby I love you. You like this don't you?" She asks as she pushes into me and seems to actually want an answer.

"God, yesss…. So good, Bella…. I love you." I say in between moans and Bella seems to relax a bit and with a flick of her wrist on my clit I cum.

I shudder and spasm as I climax and my world falls apart in the most pleasant of ways. I can tell by the way my body keeps spasaming that this is one of the best orgasms of my life. After a moment passes I register the world around me and I feel Bella under me as she plays with my hair.

She's breathing a bit irregulary so I'm just guessing she's exausted. I shift and snuggle into her side and see that she dosen't have the strap-on on her. I guess she un-straped and I huddle into her loving embrace.

After a minute or two of complete uter blessed out silence Bella speaks quietly. "I love you, you know that right?" She asks. I nod wiht my eyes lazily closed as I snuggle into her neck and kiss it. "And I love you." I say.

She hugs me and sighs happily. "You are the most important person in my life." Bella says softly before kissing my head and taking a deep breath and sighing. "Sleep my Alice, we have a long day ahead of us." She says and kisses my head. I nod and with one loving peck I fall asleep in Bella's arms.

_**OoOoOoOoOoOo…(later that night)**_

_**Bpov**_

I wake up from a nightmare and look next to me to see Alice curled up at my side. I snuggle a bit into her but then slowly pull away and grab my cigaretts and head to the balcony.

I see my guitar there and chuckle as I light up a cig and grab it. I take a drag and strum a few cords. I chuckle and pull the cig out after another drag to flick the ashes off. I bring it back to my mouth and start to strum a familiar song and sing softly…

**Can you tell me, softly**

**How you'll always haunt me**

**Can you help me**

**Hold me**

**Come to me now, slowly**

**You caress me, smoothly**

**Calm my fears and soothe me**

**Move your hands across me**

**Take my worries from me**

**I will sacrifice**

**I will sacrifice**

**All I have in life**

**To clear my conscience**

**I will sacrifice**

**I will sacrifice**

**All I have in life**

**Sacrifice, sacrifice**

**Can you feel me, solely**

**Deeper still and wholly**

**With your understanding**

**And your arms around me**

**Can you help me**

**Hold me**

**Whisper to me, softly**

**Move your hands across me**

**Take my worries from me**

**I will sacrifice**

**I will sacrifice**

**All I have in life**

**To clear my conscience**

**I will sacrifice**

**I will sacrifice**

**All I have in life**

**Sacrifice, sacrifice**

**I will sacrifice**

**Will sacrifice**

**Will sacrifice**

**Will sacrifice**

**I will sacrifice**

**I will sacrifice**

**All I have in life**

**To clear my conscience**

**I will sacrifice**

**I will sacrifice**

**All I have in life**

**Sacrifice, sacrifice**

I breath out a sigh as I strum the last chords and take a deep breath. "That was beautiful." A voice says from behind me. I jump and look behind me to see Alice in her pajamas with a white bathrobe on her shoulders while she leans against the door frame.

I smile up at her. "Oh, um thanks…" I trail off rubbing my neck and lowering the guitar from my lap. "I just…" I trail off and Alice walks over to me and kisses my cheek. "I know, I felt you jump. Let me guess… nightmare?" She asks me softly.

I sigh and rest my head on Alice's shoulder and for a moment it feels like we live together, is this what it feels like to be living together with someone? I wish it does, because Alice is incredible.

I sigh and shake my head out of my day dream. "Yeah, not a big deal though. Just had a dream where I acted stupid and you dumped me. Scared the shit out of me." I mumble agisnt her shoulder.

"I would take you back, even if you cheated on me. Because I know it will hurt me more to stay away from you then to just accept what you did." Alice says. I look in her eyes and semi glares at her. "I would never intentionaly cheat on you, Alice. And even if I did or if I slipped I would work my ass off to gain you back." I say hugging the her to me.

Alice kisses my forehead lovingly. "I know… that's why I would forgive you. I'm too in love to care for my own heart." She says and I chuckle a bit and kiss her lips and stand up with her in my arms.

"We should head to bed, its late and we have to leave in a few hours to catch our plane to NY at 7am and then hang around the city until 12am so that we can take the plane to France and get there at around I don't know late afternoon or early evening." I say with a shrug

She rolls her eyes, I can see her face perfectly in the moon light. "Why did you change the flight schedules again?" She asks me. I grin. "Because I'm taking you out on a date in Paris our first night." I say and with that I drop her in the bed and kiss her lips and snuggle in next to her for some sleep.

"I love you, my life, my Alice." I whisper in her ear as I pull her back to me under the covers. "I love you to, my everything, my Bella." She says and I kiss her cheek and we fall back into sleep.

_**A/N: Awwwwwwwwwwwwww, the ending was cute! I am such a sap. xD Review, next chapter is Paris.**_


	32. Chapter 32

_**A/N: Sorry for the long wait, my mind gave me a cool idea for a new story that is still under wrapts with no intent of publishing as of yet. So, I got a bit obsessed with that and with relaxing from my hectic week of school work. Senior year is totally beating the crap out of me.**_

_**So, enough of my life. With further ado the next chapter of the love birds**_**. J**

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT, "but alas, how can one not find romance in a place such as France?"**_

_**Ch.32**_

_**Bpov**_

Flights were normally mind numbing and boring. I used to count the hours of every flight and just will time to go faster. I have no problem with flying, its soothing. It makes you feel weightless and it gives you a space to breath away from normal mundane life. This one was an exceptation, it was fun and entertaining and especially I loved the look on Alice's eyes when we flew over the city.

It was like a child on Christmas morning and I enjoyed the look in her eyes as we strolled hand in hand down the luxurious airport and then took a private limo to the Hôtel Plaza Athénée where I think Alice's jaw dropped.

We were staying in the hotel because the ballroom of said hotel was where the fund raiser was going to be held and it had an amazing view.

I look out the dark window of the luxury suite, far black sky's as far as the eye can see but the view of the Eiffel tower in its illuminated glory and a hint of the buildings under it. It's a breath taking beauty that makes you think how a world so corrupted could have a sight so breathtaking.

Must there be a God who thinks life is good? But… if there were wouldn't that mean a Devil would lurk just under it? Religion is confusing, why would you believe in a good that also made you believe in an evil? I mean… there was a time I believed in a God and that if I believed hard enough, if a prayed hard enough and if I was in all not a sinner…I thought he would save me.

But, then you had to make the debate. If god truly thought that love was only between a man and a woman. Why are there Gays? And why does love exist in between the two? Isn't love supposed to be a connection your soul makes to another soul and there a bond grows?

Then, if that were the case. Would I not be accepted into heaven because I fell in love with Alice? Yet, even if love is a holly emotion? Then, if God did not punish but give. Why had I suffered all my life? Why had I been witness to such cruel thinks that made me into who I am?

Could it be that God –if he did exist- punished me before I made the sin? But, in doing so. Wouldn't that had change my future and maybe if that had been the case I would be straight. If a man and a woman had to be the only beings to fall in love and actually experience love, then how come men killed woman. Woman killed men for love?

Then, why would God make such a things even possible if they were a sin? Why not just stop the two men or two woman to meet at the beginning? What if God –again, if he did exist- changed his mind after he told the man to write the bible?

I mean, who doesn't change there mind? What if even if he knows everything that is going to happen, he is shocked by the pure emotion between the same sex? That would have to count for something. After all, how could one be punished for falling in love?

I would rather go through purgatory and hell a thousand times before I let go of my love for Alice. But… could I condemn her soul if that were the price? Ughh, this is why I hate religion. Its useless but it does make the time pass.

Just then I remember when I was trying to make time pass in the plane and chuckle softly to myself.

_I was looking at Alice while she slept when I felt a light tap on my shoulder snapping me out of my lucid thinking and back to the real world. I raise an eyebrow at the person next to me. It's a flight attendant, she's in that dark blue vest uniform and light blue button up shirt. Her hair is pulled up in a neat ponytail and her face has a soft tone of make up._

_But in all she's plain, I lower my sunglasses and clear my throat. "Yes?" I ask her. She gives me a seductive smile and her eyes shine with… lust maybe? I don't know, she's weird._

_"Sorry, to bother you. I was just wondering if there was anything I could do to make this flight more comfortable for you." She says. A low chuckle escapes me and I tilt my head to the side. "And what exactly would be the… exception for your kindness?" I ask sweetly but my eyes that are still tilted down on her as I keep my sunglasses at the point of my nose._

_"Nothing at all." She says in what she thinks is a seductive voice. I hold back a laugh and grin at her but shake my head. "Sorry but, I'm taken." I say and as to make my point I glance at Alice who is asleep and snuggling in her first class seat. "That doesn't mean I can't make your flight more enjoyable." She says with a slip of her hand on my shoulder and down my arm._

_I hold back my grimace as I slide back my shades and brush her hand off my arm. Surprisingly its Alice who comments. "What would make my flight a lot more enjoyable would be if un-professional flight attendants would stop hitting on my girlfriend, especially while I take a nap." Alice says as her eyes slowly open to a glare._

_I smirk. "Well then, yes. I second that." I say and turn my eyes to the shocked and a bit frazzled flight attendant. With a huff she walks away and I chuckle slowly as I turn my head to look at Alice._

_"So, you heard all that?" I ask. Alice shrugs. "I caught part of it, I was still asleep. I just woke up actually, not a pleasant way to wake up I must admit." She says with a yawn at the end._

_I chuckle at her. "Well, you didn't miss much. Just really bad flirting." I say with a shrug. Alice frowns. "Why can't anyone see that your mine? Is the connection that appalling?" She asks._

_I shake my head with a softly chuckle. "Its not appalling at all, its just too good to be true, the world is jealous that I have the perfect woman. And miraculously she loves me just as much as I love her." I say. Alice chuckles and leans forward to touch her lips to mine in a swift sweet kiss. "You are so cheesy, but I love you either way." She says with a giggle._

_I scoff. "Must you hurt me woman?" I ask her. She shrugs. "Its not like its my fault your a cheese ball." She says with her tongue poking out. I lean forward and snap my teeth an inch from her delectable mouth. "Hide it or I'll bite it." I say with a grin. She tilts her head and leans forward to nip at my lower lip. "I love it when you bite." She says before pulling away and leaning back in her seat to look out the window while my eyes are dazed._

_"Tease." I say and she just offers me a wink._

Alice just then walks back in, snapping me away from my memory and back to the room. She's wearing a tempting and fashionable as always Red short dress that reached her middle thigh and hung on her every curve and opened up on top as a low cut V neck with long sleeves that reached her forearm. And the low cut of the chest showed off her amazing long neck.

Her hair is slicked back in a way that makes her look older and as always hot as hell. Her make up is perfect and smoky and her lips resemble the red of the dress. She's also wearing black heel boots, that bring her up to my height.

"Breath taking." I mumble. Alice smiles curiously and raises an eyebrow. "What?" she asks. I give her a smile. "Nothing just that your breath taking and I just remembered a debate I was having to myself." I mumble.

She smiles and I sit up from the bed and walk over to her, my heels clicking on the floors as I make my way to her and cup her face in my hands before I lean forward and kiss her lips sweetly. Then I turn her around and place the necklace around her neck and quickly latch it and turn her around again.

She frowns. "What did you put on me?" She asks. I wink and walk with her to the open living space so she can see herself in a mirror that is there. She gasps and touches the thin silver locket with her finger tips. "Well, I always tell you that you own my heart. I guess it was time to get proof of it." I say as I wrap my arms around her from behind her and place my chin on her shoulder and look at her as her eyes look from the locket to me repeatedly.

"Bella… I…" She trails off shaking her head and I smile. "Open it." I say and she frowns but does and again a soft. "Oh, my, god." She mumbles when there are two pictures of us, one in our meadow and one of us kissing that I used my phone to snap. Alice turns on her heels and locks my lips with hers. "I love it, I love it, thank you." she says when she pulls back and turns again to look at it in the mirror.

I laugh softly at her and I hear her sigh and a second later the shades are off my eyes and she smiles. "I told you not to hide your eyes from me, Bella." She says giving me a slight smirk. I shrug. "Its not you I'm hiding my eyes from, beautiful. It's the world." I say with an eye roll.

Alice chuckles and her hand softly cups my cheek and her thumb runs across my jaw and cheek in a soothing way that I find myself leaning into her touch and closing my eyes to cherish it. "What's on that beautiful, intelligent and creative mind of yours?" She asks lowly.

A smile tugs on my lips as I sigh in content. "Nothing, just debating religion. And weather or not God –if he is real- would still consider it sin if I love you. Yet not consider that if our love is more pure then the love of the said original sex. Then I was just considering that if God would still place me in hell for loving you. Not that I believe in hell or anything remote to it but still. Could I risk your soul, in the eyes of your god. Just for the sake of being selfish and loving you." I say and sigh.

"Still, I would chose a thousand hells then to stop loving you." I say with a soft smile on my lips. Alice hum's and I open my eyes to see her biting her lip and looking at my face deep in thought. "What if God changed his mind, it's a possibility." She offers. I smile at her and shrug "What if a random guy just wrote the bible and people kept adding their person thoughs and then when God comes down from heaven he looks at us and yells 'Do you really think I would right this stuff?' and then it would just be all a cruel joke." I say with a smirk.

Alice roles her eyes but then frowns in thought before her eyes growing wide "Oh my god, that would suck! Can you imagine if a guy actually wrote that saying it was in God that told him and it was just filled with his own stories and his own way of thoughts! That would suck!" She says in utter shock and I laugh rather loudly.

"I know right?" I say chuckling but I shrug. "I guess we won't know until we die or until said man comes down from heaven. Ugh, lets change the topic, I hate religion. The only reason I was even thinking about it was because I was looking at the sun set and I was thinking about beauty and what not." I say with a shrug.

Alice giggles at me. "Its amazing how your mind would jump from beauty to religion." She says her hazle eyes shinning with love as her thumb crosses my cheek once more. I give her a smile. "I well, I was thinking of the sun set, then about you, then about religion. My mind is just weird, I hardly even understand what goes on in there." I say and Alice laughs and pecs my lips before steping back and her eyes looking over my body.

I am currently wearing a soft brown colored short dress, sleeveless with light brown heels and my hair straight with some curls at the end. My make up is soft and my eyes are made to look smokey and I grab the sun glasses from Alice's hand and throw them on the bed.

"What?" I ask her smiling to myself. She gives me a smile back "You look beautiful." She says to me. I blush and look at my feet. "Um, thanks." I say to her and I hear her tinkling laugh.

I look up at her and roll my eyes. "Come on, Jenks should be in the lobby by now." I say taking her hand and leading her to the front door when she stops. "Um, Bella." She says. I look back "Yeah?" I ask when I see Alice standing there in the middle of the living room bitting her lip deep in thought.

"What if he, um. Doesn't like me?" She asks. I frown. "That's not going to happen. He's going to love you, everyone does." I say walking back to her and hugging her to me. My pour shy, Alice. I kiss her cheek softly. "You don't need to worry about Jenks. He's harmless." I say and pull back to look in Alice's worried eyes.

I cup her cheek and sigh. "If he doesn't like you, he can go to hell and we will just enjoy the rest of our evening together, agreed?" I ask. She looks hesitant but agrees and I smile and touch my lips to hers. "Good, now come on." I say grabbing my purse and Alice's and walking out of the room and locking it.

I slide the key card in my purse and we walk hand in hand to the elevator and then I push the button and we slowly start our desent. Alice is figgiting with her hair or changing the weight from one foot to the other. I chuckle. "Really, Alice. He is going to love you." I say giving her a reassuring smile.

She relaxs a bit against me and I kiss her head and hug her while we wait for the elevator to touch the ground. Once it does we walk out swiftly to the lobby. I look around until I see a bolding head that I recognize. I smile and pull Alice with me. "Uncle Jenks!" I call and he turns on his heels and searches until he finds me.

"Bella!" He says and walks quickly over to me and scoops me up in a hug. I hold him tightly relishing in the comforting feeling of his strong arms around me and his misky cologne that I had missed so much. I snuggle my head in his neck a bit before sighing content, I never realized how much I had missed him until now. "Its been so long my girl, how have you been?" he asks once he pulls back. I chuckle. "I've been great, how about you?" I ask unable to keep from smiling.

"Good, good. Oh, hello there darling. I'm assuming you must me Miss Alice Cullen?" He asks. Alice gives him a nervous smile and nods. "Hello, um. Yeah, that's me. You can just call me Alice, Mr. Jenks" She says.

Jenks smiles and scoops her up in a hug. "Call me Jason or just Jenks or even Uncle. I don't mind either but I hate them both my names together. And I must say what a miracle you are young girl. You have changed Bella into a less moody and better person. For that I owe you a thousand. Anything, and I mean anything at all that you ever need, do not hesitate to call me." He says handing her a card.

I roll my eyes. "I'm right here you know, uncle." I say smiling. Jenks looks back at me and waves me off. "Never has that stopped me from speaking my mind, Bella. Now, tell me Alice. How long have you been together? Bella keeps avoiding my questions every time I ask." He says giving me a wink.

I groan. "That's because and old fart like yourself shouldn't be so interested in my love life." I say wrapping an arm around Alice's waist. Alice giggles her wind chime laugh. "Oh, around two months. I haven't been keeping track." Alice says with a shrug. I chuckle and kiss her behind the ear.

Jenks smiles at us. "Well, come on, come on. Its time to go to the restaurant, our reservation is at 9 sharp its already 8:50." He says cheking his watch. Alice frowns. "Oh, we're going to be late." She says and I shake my head. "The restaurant is in the building." I say to her and she nods and smiles and Jenks walks us over to the doors.

"Réserve en vertu de Jason Jenks" He says to the waitress. She nods and with that she leads us to our table. I pull out the chair for Alice and she sits down and I pull out my own seat and sit down as Jenks does the same.

"So, uncle. How has everything been?" I ask with a hint of a smirk. I know exactly how his life is going, he has a date for the night of the fund raiser. He actually blushes and I gasp maybe making Alice throw me a worried look as I gasp at my uncle.

"You are so in love with her!" I accuse him with a grin. Alice relaxs but looks amused at me and my uncle. "I am not." He says looking at the menu the waitress had left. Hidding his faze behind it.

I chuckle and lean forward and grab the menu from him and hold it away from him. "What's her name?" I ask. He blushes and looks at Alice. "Surely this is not a conversation your girlfriend would like to hear." He says.

I turn to Alice. "Alice?" I ask. She shakes her head and holds her hands up. "I am not getting involved in this. This is between you and your uncle." She says and for a fatal escape she grabs a menu and starts to skim through it before placing it down and grining sheepishly.

"Its in French." She mumbles and Jenks and I laugh. I chuckle and lean forward and kiss her cheek. "Lets just save that conversation for later, uncle Jenks. And Alice, whatever you do not ask for escargot. Anything but that, the only person here that would eat that is Jenks and I hope you reserve that delicacy for your private time because I don't look forward to vomiting." I say giving him a warning glare.

He pouts but nods. "Fine, I'll ask for the usual… number seven." He says looking at his menu. I chuckle and let my eyes skim over the menus and look at Alice. "Just chose whatever picture looks appetizing." I say to her and Jenks nods. "Yes, just avoid at all cost number thirteen. Nasty even for me." He mumbles and I choke out a laugh.

"You just say that because you got sick last time you ate it, old man." I say with a grin. He fake glares at me. "Who you calling old, kid." He says and I snort. "Pfff't. At least I don't need to worry about my hair falling out." I add with a wink taking a sip of the wine the waitress had just given us.

I pouts. "Its not falling out, its going invisible." He says and I choke a bit on the wine as I hold in my laughter. "Suuuure, it is." I mumble and Alice giggles. "Leave your uncle alone, Bella. He's being nice." She says smiling at me and I roll my eyes.

Jenks laughs. "I like that girl, she's on my side!" He says childishly. I chuckle. "Fine, fine. Lets just order so that we can eat and then you can go take a nap old man." I say and he just rolls his eyes at me.

I wave the waitress over and thankfully she speaks English for Alice's sake. "How can I help you?" She asks with a french accent. Alice sighs next to me and I laugh softly to myself as I order my food and so does Jenks. Alice frowns and after a second orders the same dish I did.

The waitress leaves and Alice starts mumbling under her breath about how weird names didn't sound as good as the food looked which caused Jenks and I to erupt in laughter at her extent.

Until she glared at us and we calmed down. "Sorry darling but your funny." I say to her and she sticks the tongue out at me. Jenks then interrupts our small talk with a serious question.

"So, Bella. Have you considered the offer I had given you?" He asks and my eyes widen and I shoot a glance at Alice who is looking at Jenks confused. I look back at him with anger in my eyes. "Um, no. I haven't given it a thought, what with classes and all." I mumble taking a drink of my wine.

"Well, exactly why you should consider it. You can just take the G.A.T. and focus your full time to the business. And then take some extra classes in business just to inforse your knowledge." He says with a shrug and my eyes widen in warning at him to stop talking.

"I… haven't given it much thought, Jenks. I promise to think about it some more." I mumble and chance a glance at Alice who is frowning and looking at me. "Your thinking about droping out?" She asks.

I shake my head. "I- I wouldn't be droping out, I would be a graduating. I would just get my diploma in the mail and it would give me more time to focus on the business but I haven't though about it much. Remember? I told you it was just an option not that I would take it." I say trying to walk out of the dip shit my uncle threw me in.

"But, your still considering it?" She persists. I sigh and run a hand through my hair and shoot a discrete glare at my uncle who is momentarily avoiding my gaze and looking around the elegant restaurant.

"Um, I never really stopped considering it. It's a intreaging option but I didn't want to upset you. That's why I never brought it up." I say to her. She shakes her head and gives me a soft smile "Its alright, lets just enjoy dinner. We have more then enough time to discuss this when were back home." She says and I groan and discretly kick uncle under the table.

He jumps and galres at me and I glare back but just then the food shows up and wouldn't you know it, the bastard ordered a small dish of escargot. I hold back my gag and look at my dish and grin Seafood medley. I look to Alice to see her sigh in relief as she takes the first tentative bite.

Then I look at uncle and gag and Alice does the same. Snails, who the fuck eats snails? "That is disgusting, uncle." I say not looking at him but at my plate while I hear the slurp as he sucks the small slug from its shell.

"Its completely satisfying, and not at all disgusting. Not my fault you hate it." he mumbles and as I take a bite of food he slurps one again. I glare at him and he grings and places the shell on the small platter.

"Fine, I'll use the fork." He mumbles and I give him a grateful not and Alice a nudge. She looks a little green and I chuckle and nod to the food. "Trust me, it taste good." I say and as to prove it I take a bite of my food and smile.

She chuckles at me and just like that we spend the rest of the night, jokes and rude comments. And then all in all a perfect night. Alice and I went back to our room after dinner, jet lag finaly catching up with us.

We take a shower together and after a round of amazing shower sex we get dressed for the night and go to bed where I pull her back against my front and snuggle my head in her hair and just like that we fall asleep.

And before I go to sleep I can't help but wonder what it would feel like to live with Alice, falling asleep with her in my arms every night, I can get used to this.

_**A/N: next chapter is a romantic date and a shopping spree. Sorry for the long wait and hope I can update soon. Ill try my best not that it helps, just ask my beta xD**_

_**I secretly believe she is just as addicted to this story as the rest of you, if not more xD**_


	33. Chapter 33

_**A/N: finaly it is here, paris day! Num 2**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch. 33**_

_**Bpov**_

I woke up slowly almost falling back into sleep if not for the faint sound of music. I burry my head under the huge pillows and sigh as I snuggle in deeper into the cool pillows and warm blankets.

Just then I feel a hand trail up slowly from my ankle and trail up slowly until my shoulder blade and I shudder. Then I feel the bed dip and then I feel pressure on my lower back, and small hands on my shoulder blades.

I hum loudly when the small hands start to massage my back and I pull my head out of my make shift burrow. "Mmm, what a good way to wake up." I mumble feeling a smile creep on my face.

Alice lifts up a bit and I flip myself on to my back and rest my head on pillows while I look up at her smiling face. "I can't believe you brought me to Paris." She says and I chuckle at the huge smile on her face.

"Well, look out the window and then tell me that again." I say. Alice giggles, "I spent the whole sunrise looking at it. I was just waiting for you to wake up, but you take forever so I decided to take matters in to my own hands." She says to me. I roll my eyes and frown. "Wait, what? You've been up since sunrise?" I ask.

She nods. "That can't be healthy." I say cupping her cheek and running a thumb across her jaw. She gives me a smile. "Neither is smoking weed." She counters and I sigh and bite my lip. "You smoke weed." I counter.

She shakes her head. "I smoked weed that night on the beach and I have smoked weed in the past. I haven't touched the thing in months. But, when was the last time you smoked some?" She asks.

I frown. "Three days ago." I say. She raises an eyebrow as in proving a point. "What?" I ask. She frowns. "Bella, it's a gate way drug. What happens when next time you smoke it, you want something stronger?" She asks.

I roll my eyes. "You think I'm addicted?" I ask a bit offended she would think that. Her eyes go wide. "What? No. I don't. I- I just worry that you may become addicted." She says sitting up and sitting on the bed.

I quickly get off the bed and look at her sitting on the bed and shake my head and look out the window and run a hand through my hair and clench my jaw for a bit. Then relax it and rub my hand on my face.

I'm a bit angry but I don't want to fight with her, sure I know I can get addicted and that it may lead me to stronger drugs but damn it! I sigh and look at her in the eyes to see that she is worried. My shoulders slump.

Decision time, tell her that I won't quit or tell her that I will. I can't do drugs while I'm with her… shit. Does this shit happen to everyone? I groan and look out the window "Fine, Alice. I'll quit." I say.

She looks at me in a bit of shock. "I… I wasn't asking you to quit." She says softly. I shrug. "Its something about me that bothers you and I don't want that stupid escape to get in the way of us." I say to her.

She looks at me and slowly gets off the bed and quietly gives me a hug. I wrap my arms around her and hug her to me tightly. "Nothing is more important than you Alice, you know that right?" I ask her softly.

She nods against my neck and with a kiss to the top of her head I slip out of her hug and and with a wink go to the bathroom to take a shower. I turn on the shower and put it on hot and go over to the sink and brush my teeth .

Once that is done the bathroom is starting to fill with steam so I go over to the tub and slide in, I was going to take a shower but damn. A hot bath is just to tempting. I lay down slowly and the warm water.

I close my eyes and relax into the warm water my muscles relaxing under the warm water… my mind drifts…

_~dream~_

_I hear the door creak open but I don't open my eyes to it._

_I know its Alice. "Yes, darling?" I ask her. Theres a soft sigh and I open my eyes and the first thing I see is that the warm water has changed. Its filled with blood. I shift a bit and the warmth of the blood trickles down my body and I jump up and out of the tub gaging at it._

_My eyes are wide as I try to understand where this blood came from. "A-Alice, w-what happened?" I ask turning on my heels only to freeze in pure fear. My muscles lock and my blood runs cold at the sight in front of me._

_A man looks back at me, cold light blue eyes stare back at me. Long dirty blond hair falls just over his eyes that make his sun kissed skin look even more dark in comparison. His head lifts up to show me a sick smirk and he steps out of the shadow he was in._

_His muscles prominent under his deep blue shirt and on his arms and a scream is stuck in my throat._

_"Isabella… what's a matter? Cat got your tongue?" He asks smiling his perfect white teeth gleaming in the low light. I cover myself after my shock wares off. "What the hell are you doing here?" I hiss at him._

_He chuckles and takes a step closer. "Why hide your body? Its nothing I haven't seen before Isabella." He says in his sweet guy voice. I glare at him. "Your sick, you little bastard. How's your daddy? Still screwing the gardener?" I ask with a smirk._

_His eyes blaze with furry and I re-think that I probably shoudn't have said that. But, its to late. He walked the three steps over to me and pushed me against the tile wall. "You little bitch. You don't know anything." He spits at me and its my turn to smirk at him._

_"I know how to pleasure a girl without making her want to kill herself. That's more then I can say for you." I chuckle and he just gets madder. He grabs my neck and throws me to the blood filled tub._

_"I'll kill you this time." I spit as he pushes his musclar arms down sinking my head in the warm blood. I struggle against his grasp cutting the flesh of his arms with my nails when I start to feel week, I need to breath._

_Just then I convulse under the blood and he pulls me out to stare at his face only that when I get a chanse to wipe my eyes its… Alice. She's glaring at me and has a smirk on her lips as she pushes my head under the blood once more. My mouth open for a scream fills with blood._

_~end dream~_

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HH!" I scream at the top of my lungs as I open my eyes. My hand automatically goes to my throat as my eyes scan the crystal clear water around me. I hear the door slam open and I look to it to see a frazzled Alice standing there with wide eyes.

Once our eyes meet she frowns and walks quickly over to me and sits on the edge of the bathtub and hugs me. "Shhh… it was a dream Bella. Shhhh… calm down. I'm here, I'm here and you're ok." She coos me while I stay frozen in pure shock. My shoulders start to relax only to start to convulse and before I know it I'm sobbing into Alice's shoulder.

"Its ok, I'm here. Nothing is wrong, your safe. Shhhhhhh… calm down, Bella. Please? For me baby, please calm down. Why are you crying, what was your dream about?" She asks. And I just shake my head into her shoulder and try to pull myself back together.

"I-I'm ok." I say quietly after a moment of silence. Alice pulls away from me and cups my face in her hands. "Babe, what's wrong? What was your dream about?" She asks. I close my eyes and try to give her a smile, it turns out as a grimace.

"Noth-" I'm cut off. "And don't lie to me." She says seriously and I sigh. I stand from the bath and quickly grab a towel and dry myself off. "Nothing, just a bad dream. Don't worry about it." I say to her as I walk out of the bathroom and to the room.

I snicker when I see that Alice has picked out an outfit for me and I wrap a towel around my hair as I dry my body. "Bella, as much as it turns me on to see you drying yourself off. Please tell me what happened." She begs.

I frown and my shoulders slump. "I just had a bad dream about Connor and how he was drowning me in a bathtub filled with blood and when he pulled my head out to smirk at me and push me back in he changed into…" I trail off shaking my head.

What the fuck is wrong with my head? What does this dream mean, if it does have a meaning? "He changed into who?" She asks. I frown. "Its stupid and irrelevant." I say as I slip on my underwear and bra quickly.

"Please, I don't care if its stupid. I just want to know." She says quietly as I slip on my jeans. "Fine, he turned into you. You smirked at me and then pushed me back into the blood trying to drown me." I say quietly before slipping the shirt over my head.

"Bella…" She says softly and I give her a crooked smile and walk over to her and kiss her lips once, twice, three times before brushing my nose against hers and kissing her forehead and resting mine aginst hers. "I know. I know you will never hut me like that, besides… if that ever did happen. I could totally pin you down." I say with a smirk.

She gaps and playfully slaps my arm before knotting her hand in my hair and kissing me deeper. I moan into her mouth as she slides her tongue into my mouth. My hand grips her waist roughly as I angle her and slowly push her down on the bed.

I intwine our fingers with our free hands and I kiss her softly just showing her how much I truly do love her. I slowly climb on the bed on top of her and once I hear her moan softly I pull back and lean my head on her shoulder and breath a bit. "I love you." I say and she tugs on my head with her hand that is still tangled in my hair and pulls my head up to hers.

"And I love you." She says before brushing her lips against mine softly over and over again until I feel my heart swell and I can't help it, I beg for her body. I trail my hand down her body slowly. "Alice…" I whisper softly.

Her hand leaves my hand as she grabs my waist and pushes hers against mine. I connect our lips softly again. My hand trails down her body gently until I reach under her shirt and her breathing hitches and I smirk against her lips as I kiss down her neck.

"I want to make love to you." I say softly against her ear. "Bella…" She says softly and I bring my lips back to hers where she kisses me again and just when I'm about to take off her shirt, the phone rings.

"Bella." Alice says. I shake my head against her neck and kiss and nibble at her pulse point the way I know drives her crazy. "Ignore it." I say as I kiss my way down over her shirt until she sighs and pushes me off her. I fall to the side not really expecting her to had push me off and she stretches to get the phone.

I groan and mumble. "Pussy-blocker" Under my breath before she answers the phone. "Hello?" She asks. "Oh, hey mom." She says and I groan even louder, the mood is ruined. I sigh and get off the bed and walk over to the dresser giving Alice a bit of privacy as she speaks to her mother.

I brush my hair and decide to let it dry naturally so I walk over to the kitchen after winking at Alice as I make my way. I close the door quietly behind me and turn on the TV and make my way to the kitchen .

"I'm starving." I groan to myself as I open the fully stalked fridge and grab a bunch of random stuff to make a breakfast for me and Alice. I decide to make scrambled eggs with baggles, a fruit dish, bacon and coffee.

I start chopping ingredients for the scrambled eggs while I heat the pan. I get immersed in my work while I listen to the news and what not and just when I finish cooking and place the food on plates and move them to the living room Alice walks out of the door holding her head.

I frown. "What's wrong?" I ask. She shakes her head and sits down. "My mother just gave me the sex talk, through the phone… again." She says and I snort before erupting I to laughter. Then I stop short. "Wait, what do you mean again?" I ask.

She frowns and blushes. "She gave it to me before I had the fight with you two days ago." She mumbles. I chuckle and she looks at me and glares. "Its not funny! My father was in it! He kept talking about sicknesses and how sex could affect my personal life or something. I just know it was humiliating then it was more awkward because they've never really prepared for me to be active in bed." She says.

I gap at her and stand up. "You told them we were having sex!?" I ask/shout in mortification. She ducks her head. "I had to! With Emmett's big mouth and Edward's knowing smirk they were bound to find out and I rather they peiced together all of your dirty comments at my house!" She says to me.

I pale a bit. "Shit, Carlisle knows I have sex with his daughter… I am so screwed. I am going to die… your dad… aw fuck." I groan as I sit on the couch. "He's going to kill me when I get back there isn't he?" I ask.

She chuckles and I look over at her seriously. "Hey, I may not be a guy so he may not cut off my dick but he can… wait… ha, he can't do shit, I'm a girl" I say and laugh. Then she just has to mention something. "Esme is a girl." She says and I frown.

"Shit, I so can not hit your mother. Its just… it should be illegal to even raise your voice to the woman! She's just to… motherly!" I say to her and she chuckles. "Their not mad, drama queen." She says taking a bite of the food.

I gasp dramatically "I am not a drama queen, I just value my life… now." I say grinnig. She roles her eyes and takes another bite of food and hmm's in approval. "This taste great thank you, baby." She says after swallowing and pecks me on the lips.

I grin and shrug. "I'm just fucking with you, I don't really care if your parents know. Hell, if you knew how many parents have walked in on me and their children you would be shocked." I say.

Which makes her choke on her coffee a bit and I pat her back gently. "What?" She asks. I shrug. "Um, parents have caugh me in the act… fathers on occasion have actually thrown me out of ther houses. Its rather fun to tell you the truth." I say.

She shakes her head and laughs softly. "Only you would find a parent throwing you out of the house funny." She mumbles and I shrug. "What? It was funny! They are used to kicking out guys! Imagine there shocked face when they kick me out. Then all they say is dyke. Which to I respond 'your daughter loves it when I call her carpet muncher which earns me a door slammed in my face." I say chuckling.

"You are so fucked up." Alice says laughing and I nod. "Yup, I am." I say leaning back in my chair. We eat in silence watching the TV and after we eat I ask her if she wants to go out.

"Sure." She says and walk out to grab some clothes and hops in the shower. I wait for her while I clean the dishes and relax in the sofa.

Once she walks out of the room in jeans, a white blouse I feel myself drool. She looks good in everything. "You look hot as always, beautiful." I say to her. She smiles "Thank you." She says and when I look down at my clothes… we match.

"You are adorable." I say with a kiss to her lips before I pull her out of the apartment and on to the streets of Paris. I walk her down a few streets as we enjoy the breezy day and we quickly reach a store and I open the door as we enter.

"Go, shop. Its all on me." I say to her. "No way." She says and I wink at her. "Shopping spree number one, begins now and ends in about… when the shops close." I say. She shakes her head and I just walk in deeper in the store.

"Buy stuff, I'm not kidding." I say and just like that, Alice became like a little clothes ninja. She started dragging around the store picking up outfits and handing them to me to hold and before I know it I'm having second thoughts on shopping with Alice.

Its not the money, its how heavy clothes are! My god! She dashes to the fitting rooms and tries out every single outfit and I really enjoy that part. After about an hour in this store I buy her five outfits here.

I walk her to another store and this time she makes ME try on clothes just like her and I end up with six new outfits and she ends up with three in this store.

We head to another store just for shoes and I buy her five pairs much to her chagrin. She wanted two but I saw her eyeing the other pairs and made her try them on. I came out of this store with three boxes of shoes.

We go to another, then another all with the same results and soon I'm having a blast with Alice. I have never liked shopping but she makes it so much fun! She runs through rack after rack of clothing and matches up the oddest things that pull the outfit together. After about five hours of just pure on shopping and two cab rides back to the hotel to put the bags in our room and head out again.

Before I know it were at our last stop for the day Victoria Secret where I insist on not buying anything for myself but she still convinces me on buying around… ten panties sets that if I do say so myself are hot as fuck.

But what Alice bought made me want to drip she bought around… six night gowns and around ten pairs of supper sexy underwear. After about an hour in Victoria secret we came out with around ten bags. One of them was mine.

But, I have to admit. I love buying stuff for Alice. She's adorable. The way her eyes go so wide when she finds out an outfit and my god her sexy smile when she likes the outfit she piked out of herself or for me.

And now I know a supper awesome secret Alice + Shopping = Awesome sex. Remind me to take Alice out more often.

_**A/N: romantic date and walking and talking on next chapter. Good day to you all… or isint night? Hm… I Went to see Breaking Dawn! It's epic!**_


	34. Chapter 34

_**A/N: Awesome reactions, awesome review's and there is an awesome spin off of this story by A Thousand Undiscovered Stars called "Selfless, But Still Selfish." That takes place after ch.29 I seriously recommend it!**_

_**READ THE A/N!**_

_**I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch.34**_

_**Bpov**_

I wake up before Alice today, just as the first light of the day started to fall through the curtains. It also didn't help that I was nervous about the fund raiser tonight. All of my future deals and current deals where going I had to be better then anyone. No flaws no weakness, it was a simple plan.

I know most people would brush me off for first, being a woman that owns a huge company. And secondly, for being a teenager that owns said huge company. They doubted I could manage it but in reality, Jenks was just a front man.

He was the person everyone saw while I was the person making the big decisions. Partly why I wanted to take my job full time. I hated the idea of anyone thinking I couldn't handle it. Hated the idea of anyone thinking just because I was young that I didn't take my work seriously and that I didn't deserve it, I WORKED MY ASS OFF FOR THIS COMPANY!

I also hated that there would be sooooo many freaking people taking pictures. Stupid paparazzi ate this shit up like it was a joke. Sure, I wasn't famous like a singer or an actor but I was famous for the important business people.

I knew anyone that was anyone in the business world and to earn their respect I had to be a hard ass. I had to be a bitch and love it. I had to be smarter then the old farts at the head of a company.

But most importantly, I had to out shine my father. Every single time I was at one of these things people would compare me to him and vice versa. I had to be better then my father at everything just so that people could respect me enough to give me the time of day to speak for my company.

I enjoyed the shocked looks of the people when I would answer there questions or when I would ask them questions about things they thought I didn't know about. I spent most of my childhood being home schooled and most of what my father taught me was business.

I snort, I'm like freaking Ritchie Rich. Bella Bank's. I couldn't contain my laughter after that one. My ridiculous mind was something to be amazed with. My laughing woke up Alice who quickly glared at me and huffed. "Wha'ta time is it?" She mumbles still half asleep.

I chuckle. "Adventure time?" I offered not knowing the current time. She nods. "Oh… I like the puppy." She mumbles before snuggling back to my side which caused me to laugh even lauder.

"Whyyyyy do you wake me up with laughter?" She groans. I laugh again, my sides are burning at this point. "You're so… so cute! Hahahahaha, like the puppy hahahahha." I say laughing.

She grins down at me. "Yeah, and I bite like a bitch." She says before leaning forward and bitting my shoulder and I yelp a bit and shake her off. I wag a finger at her. "Bad girl, no biting Bella." I say wagging my finger at her before she takes a snap at it and I cup her face in my hands.

I tisk at her shaking my head slowly. "Bad girl, Alice. Will I have to teach you a lesson?" I ask in a seductive voice. I can't suppress my smirk when her eyes glaze over a bit. She grins a bit before her face going sullen. "Maybe?" She asks and I grin as I lean to her and pin her hands on the side of her face.

"Wait! Bella." She mumbles. I stop and look at her and she shakes her head from side to side and I let her go to see her jump off the bed and head to the bathroom. I frown, is she sick?

I start to get up when I see her in the doorway while she brushes her teeth. I snort and smile to myself as I walk over to the bathroom to see her leaning over the counter to spit when I come right behind her and reach for my tooth brush and paste and start brushing my teeth as well.

After Alice and I finish brushing our teeth and rinsing, I wait for her to smile at her elf in the mirror before I grab her hand and pull her to me. She crashes into me and it suddenly reminds me of the day I gave her a ride to school all those months ago.

I look at her lips and to her eyes then, to her lips again and inch closer. My hand cups her cheek and I stop in front of her lips and look in her eyes, to her lips and back. I know I'm driving her crazy and I love it.

I smirk to myself and then I press my lips against hers harshly. I pull her incredibly closer to me and I walk slowly over to the bed where I lay her down gently and flip us over so that she is straddling my hips.

"I love you." She mumbles as she breaks the kiss and I smile in a daze. "I love you too." I say and she kisses me again. After a minute her hand brushes over my shirt clad breast and I groan to her mouth as she hum's back.

"Its not nice to tease me, Bella." She says seductively in my ear and I can't suppress a small whimper that escapes me. I knot a hand in her hair and pull her down to me again and smirk at her. "You had to be taught a lesson, my dear innocent little Alice." I say brushing my lips across hers as I speak.

"Which would be?" She asks breathlessly. "You shouldn't start what you don't intend to finish." I say in her ear as I lick the shell of it causing her to shudder above me. Her hands trail down my body once more until she grabs my wrists and pulls them up to rest next to my head.

She holds them there roughly and I can't suppress a shudder of arousal when Alice gets dominant. Sure, I love dominating her. But shit, its so fucking hot to see Alice take charge. "And who told you I had no intention of finishing, Bella?" She whispers before kissing me roughly.

My hands twitch wanting to grab onto her hair but she pulls back and smirks down at me before she looks at my hands and blushes a bit. I frown. "What?" I ask. She shakes her head before giggling softly and hiding her head in my shoulder letting go of my arms.

I lift up a bit and hug her to me. "What is it Alice? Come on tell me? Oh, and you stopped." I add with a smirk. She frowns at me and takes a deep breath before a look of determination flashes over her eyes.

"I want to try something with you Bella. Yes, it will be kinky. But I want to see what I would feel like to…" She trails off shaking her head softly. I frown and grin a bit, "To?..." I ask. "To have you at my will, like you have me almost ever night." She whispers soflty.

I smile a bit to myself and chuckle at her. "Alice, I'm always at your will. Trust me, you don't know how much I beg for your touch, be it just a brush of the hand on mine. And…I'm willing to experiment. My kinky little pixie." I add with a smile.

She chuckles and kisses me a few times "Yay! Now close your eyes I will be right back." She says. I raise an eyebrow before closing my eyes, instantly I feel her start to take off my shirt.

"Um, why are my eyes closed for the unvealing of my body?" I ask. Alice giggles. "Because I want to look over you while your not looking." She retorts and I shrug and start to take my clothes off willingly.

After I'm naked, Alice gets off the bed and I hear her rummage through some drawers until I hear a 'yes' and she walks back and I feel something fall over my eyes. I let her tie it behind my head and I smirk to myself.

"Alice is kinky. Alice is kinky. Kinky, kinky, Alice is kinky." I sing teasingly. She playfully swats my arm and I shudder a bit and I hear Alice hum. "You are so a masochist." She says to me and I shrug. "Maybe a little." I say teasingly.

She doesn't say anything but I hear her footsteps as she walks back to the dresser and starts to look in them until I hear a clink of metal as she walks over to me and pushes me down on the bed and straddles my hips.

"Can I take my blindfold off?" I ask. "Hmmm, no." Alice says as she slides up a bit more and I feel her grab my wrist and before I know it, she ties my wrist and the other end to the bed post.

A wave of arousal flows through me as I feel her tie up my other hand. I shudder a bit in excitement. "Shit, Alice. This is hot." I say to her and I feel her finger at my mouth. "I love how you look right now Bella. You're completely under my will yet you continue to tease me. Maybe I shouldn't let you off easy." She mumbles to herself and my ears perk up at hearing this.

Fuck, this is hot. "Oh, dear God, don't let me off easy." I mumble to myself and I swear I hear her laugh at me. Soon I feel her move off me and I feel something tie my legs down until I am a bound completely and I can't move.

I test the restraints and shit, there tight. I grin a bit and try to listen to where Alice is. She moves around the room for a few minutes, giving me the chance to focus on heightening my senses. I can smell vanilla in the air and hear a soft sizzling.

Is she lighting candles? I hear her move the night table a bit closer to the bed and a soft clank of a metal something that has my curiosity burning. My breathing is heavy already, my arousal just flaring up every time her hand brushes across my skin. Just then, I feel a hand trail up from my ankle to my inner thigh then away and to my stomach to the center of my breasts until it cups my chin.

I shudder a bit at the feeling of nails carving against my flesh. God, this is making me a horny mess. "What was that about not going easy on you, Bella?" She asks in my ear, I can feel the hot breath tickling my neck as she speaks to me.

I suppress a small moan. "Nothing." I mumble and I hear her breathy laugh and it sends a chill up my spine, the good kind of course. I feel her tug on the thing that was blocking my veiw and the first thing I notice is that the room is dark, but candle lit.

I look around the room to see candles burning all around the room sending the sence of euphoria even higher up. I can smell the vanilla on them and Alice know's how much I love her perfume and bought it as candles.

Then I look up at her where she is standing next to the bed in a night gown… Fuck me. Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me. That is what that night gown is saying to me. Its deep red sending my mouth watering.

The thin material leaving nothing for the imagination and just making Alice look hot as hell. The fabric is almost transparent and I can see her breasts but barely see her nipples. The material flow's down and clings to her every curve making her look sexy as fuck.

The thin short skirt it has barely even cover's her ass and that thong… God, I want to be that thong. I suppress a groan but just barely as I see her run her hands along her own body teasing me. "Like what you see?" She asks lowly.

I nod quickly. "Yes, you look beautiful, baby." I say practically eye fucking her. She chuckles a bit and quickly straddles my hips before leaning forward and kissing me softly, I lean forward trying to deepen the kiss when Alice pushes me back down.

"Patience is a virtue." She says quietly and I groan when she rolls her hips against mine slowly. She runs her hands slowly, teasingly slow until she's cupping both my breast in her hands and massaging them while she kisses my neck.

I moan when she rolls my nipple between her fingers and brings her mouth over to sooth it. She repeats the motion around three times on each breast before her hips grind on mind again.

My center screaming and dripping for attention. Fuck, I need her to touch me. "Please, Alice." I moan when she grinds against me once more. "What do you want?" She asks me seductively.

I look at her body, she still has clothes on. "Take them off. I need to see you." I say looking at her body. She chuckles before she slowly runs her hands over her body and my abdomen clenches.

My eyes follow her hands as the slowly take off the night gown only leaving her in her thong and thin bra. My eyes scan over her body and I shudder when I feel her ghost the material over my body before throwing it to the side.

My eyes run over Alice's body her pail skin shouting at me to be touched, licked, loved… my god. I follow Alice's hands as they tease the straps of her bra before leaning forward so that her breasts are above my mouth.

"Do you want to take this off?" She asks me. I don't hesitate as I lean forward and nibble at the strap at the front of her breasts, trying my damn best to snap it off. And finaly after a minute I actually manage it.

Alice leans back before I can even take a nipple into my mouth and I try to hold back my whimper at the loss. "Alice…" I groan, can't she see I need her? I fucking need to feel her, taste her, touch her. I shudder when she grinds her hips against me.

She lifts off me enough to take off her own underwear and now she's bare in front of me. She suprises the hell out of me though when she cups her own breast and starts to massage it. Its not lost on me when she trails her other hand to her hips and starts to touch herself.

I whimper, this is sexy. Alice just uses sexy-ness. She is the most sexy person I have ever met and this just made her even sexier. Her hand slips easily between her legs that where on my stomach. She moans lowly as she sinks into her hand and my core clenches and throbs, the heat hard to ignore.

I watch with undivided attention as my Alice pleasures herself with her hand. Her head falls back as she gasps the hand on her breasts sliding down to her clit. She starts to tease her clit as she lifts up and down against my stomach her juices dripping onto my stomach making me moan and groan at the same time.

"God, Alice please…" I beg, I need her. Fuck, I crave her. My arms flex against the restraints and Alice moans as I look back at her body to see her not stopping her actions. I whimper and test the restrains again. "Fuck, Alice please…" I beg again and her eyes open just a bit to look over at me.

Her eyes are lazy and I think she's right on the verge of cuming. "What do you want Bella?" She asks breathlessly. "You, I want you. God, I want to taste you and touch you. Fuck, Alice I need you." I beg and she gives me a smile before leaning forward and giving me exactly what I wanted.

She straddles my face and I lick feverently loving the moans that come out of her mouth. Then I plunge my tongue on to her and whimper a bit when I feel her clench around my tongue.

She comes quickly and once I'm done licking her clean she moves away and I lick my lips. I close my eyes to breath deeply when I feel a tongue trace my stomach. My eyes snap open as I look at her.

Alice starts to slowly kiss and lick her way down to where I'm throbbing for her. "A-Alice you don't have to.." I trail off when she lifts her head to smile at me. "I want to Bella." She breaths and then she licks me and I spasm and moan loudly.

She licks firmly and teases my clit with kisses and I start to rock my hips along the rhythm she placed un-able to contain my moans and grunts. I relish the attention she gives me as I focus on the pleasure and her.

She then starts to nibble against my folds and sucks my clit into her mouth before grazing her teeth against my clit making me cup powerfully. My eyes shut and my whole body spasms as wave after wave of pleasure asoults my senses. Shit, can you die from sensory over load?

My body becomes nothing, my muscles becoming play dough and my muscles jelly. My eyes remain shut for a long while as I cherish the warmth of Alice's body next to mine. My eyes open slowly as I start to regain myself.

That's when I notice that my arms are wrapped around her I look at my wrists and frown. "What happen to my restraints?" I mumble. Alice chuckles. "I took them off when you started to yell my name." She says.

I frown. "I yelled your name?" I ask. She giggles. "That and a lot more." She says. I chuckle and turn my head to look at her as she curls on my arm. "What did I say?" I ask. She leans up and rest on her elbow and chuckles. "Alice, Baby, yess, fuck yes. I love you, Alice, god, motherfucking yes, baby, Alice, fuck… love you… And I think that's pretty much it. Only that you yelled my name the first time." She says with a smirk.

I roll over and hide my head in her neck as I snuggle into it and kiss her shoulder and wrap my arm around her waist, hugging her to me. "God, I love you Alice. Thank you, thank you so much." I mumble to her.

She chuckles and runs a hand through my hair lazily. "And why the thank you Darling?" She asks happily. Her voice like music to my ears and I sigh and lean back to look in her eyes. "For loving me, back." I say my voice wavering a bit in the middle but I'm just showing her the vulnerably in my eyes.

My fear of the future, my fear of myself, all the hut I have felt and the fear of feeling more. The gapping emptiness that is in my life when she leaves me alone and the haunted girl I haven't let anyone see since Charlie died. My eyes sting a bit and my heart clenches at reliving this deep emotion but I want to show her.

I'm not perfect, I'm not as strong as I let on, I'm fucked up and haunted. Hurt and dangerous, yet she still loves me. Her hazle eyes shine with some cut deep emotion at looking at my eyes.

Her hand slowly cups my cheek and she looks at my eyes. "I will always love you Bella." She says quietly. I smilie at myself, _Believe her_… a voice in my mind says. I clench my jaw and shake my head softly. "Why?..." I ask.

My voice soft and pleading, I need to know why this… angel loves me. I need to try and understand. She cups my cheek. "Because your funny, smart, thoughtful, sensitive, cleaver, witty, you have this tortured past yet you have enough strength to laugh everyday. You should detest the world, yet you only fake it to hate it. You could have turned out so much worse yet… you try your best to find a reason to continue living." She says her voice just as soft but with an edge.

She's trying to convince me. "Alice… your talking about the Bella that exists because your in my life… before you came along… I was the opposite of everything you just said." I say quietly. "What do you mean? She asks. I take a deep breath.

Should I tell her? Tell her the whole truth?... Should I tell her the main reason why I wanted her to come to Paris with me?... Should I ask her the question that could make or break us? Or should I just hide it for a bit longer?

Choices… choices that I'm to afraid to make. There are three C's in life: Choices, Chances and Changes. You must make a choice to take a chance or your life will never change. I had mocked Charlie when he told me this… now, I finaly understood what he meant.

_**A/N: What the hell is Bella talking about huh?... interesting…. Please read the first A/N important stuff on it! R&R.**_


	35. Chapter 35

_**A/N: So… you guys liked the chapter? Wahahah! I'm awesome I know. This chapter will make you guys flip out, i can just feel it. **_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch.35**_

_**Apov**_

What the hell is Bella talking about? What does she mean, the Bella I know now is because I am in her life? Since the first day I met her she's always been the same to me. Kind, Caring, Funny, Un expected, Cocky. She hasn't changed a bit since the first day I met her.

I shake my head as I pull the shirt over my head and walk back to the room where Bella is smoking a cig on the balcony I walk over to her and bum a smoke from her and she smiles around her cigarette when I tell her she could pass off as a cigarette commercial.

After we finish our cigarettes we wander back to the bed and cuddle while Bella arranges her thoughts. She hums softly and kisses the top of my head before sighing. "I love you, Alice. More than anything, more than anyone, I hope you know that." She says quietly. I lift my head and nod. "I know, and I love you too, more than anything." I say truthfully.

She sighs and her face gets a bit serious, "I'm not sure how to start telling you this… it's a bit of a long story, its things you already know but I had never gone in to detail. I never wanted you to know how messed up I really am… for fear that you would leave me but, it's not fair to drag you in even closer if you don't know the whole story so… here it goes, I guess…" She mumbles and I kiss her neck lightly "I'm listening." I say quietly.

"Alice, I… I'm not the best person there is. I'm seriously fucked up and you know a big part of that but I always… avoided telling you just how fucked up I really am." She says quietly. I pull away from her and sit up until I'm sitting Indian style in front of her and she mimics me.

"I'm not sure I follow…" I say quietly. She offers me a smile and shakes her head "I may look like I'm the strongest person out there Alice… and sometimes I am. But… I'm a wreck. Before you showed up I only lived for four things. Sex, Drugs, Alcohol and Pain." She mumbles and my heart stops in my chest for a moment. She can't be serious…

"Alice, I… you know my past with the school. That I was a player and I… I took **pride** in that. I took pride in being the girl who everyone wanted and the girl that was better than anyone else. I played with ever single person in that school. Gay or straight."

"I used them to my advantage and my needs. Never letting a person be close to me and never lasting with a person for more than a weak at most. Sex, was an escape. Because… when I had that person yelling my name, that warm body against mine… I felt like someone. I felt Alive when an orgasm would run through me. My mind would only focus on that part of bliss and not in my fucked up past." She says taking a deep breath.

"Then… the sex alone wasn't working. I got desperate, I tried finding more people, playing with them even more trying to see if a… a spark or **anything** would just pop up in me to make me feel something other then pain. I had money and I had the friends so it never came down to a big problem to find some weed around." She says with a shrug as her eyes look out the window.

"The weed… helped for a while. It would make my mind fade in to nothing and then mixing that with sex made me cope for a few months. It would wash away any trace of sadness I was feeling. I had a new way of escaping. I would get high and ask people over to have sex. Both things would come so easily to me… I started getting a complex." She says with a bitter smirk.

"I felt superior to anyone, I **looked** superior. I had what people would kill for. But, not what those idiots let go to waste. I had money, but no one to waste it on. I had good looks but no one to tell me I was beautiful and hug me at night and tell me I would be ok. I had perfect grades without even trying but no parent to say they were proud of me. I had **everything**… yet I had **nothing**." She says, her face twisting in to a grimace. I grab her hand and rub my thumb along her knuckles and she offers me a hint of a smile and kisses the back of my hand.

"Then the violent rush was to much not to act upon it in school. I would fight, almost every single day with anyone who would piss me off. Coach clap showed up one day and told me 'you like hitting people?' and when I nodded he grinned 'good, I need a few girls like you. now get in that ring and show me what you can do' he had said and just like that, without hesitating… I just jumped in the ring and in less then three minutes I had knocked the girl out." She says with a hint of an amused smile on her lips… it was a haunted smile, not the real thing. Not even close.

"So, then came the next out. Pain. Then it just came so easily. I would inflict my pain in others. Push it out of my body, make them suffer if only physically how I suffered internally every single day. I knew how to fight because my dad showed me how after what happened with Connor. Drilled it in my mind, almost roughly so…" She trails off shaking her head.

"I went through my dad's own boot camp. He would make me stand out side in the rare rainy days and do push ups, jog, and throw combo's. He was a hard ass… but it was exactly what I needed… I needed someone at that time to bring me back down and just… knock some sense in me. Charlie… he did that for me. He had never really been a father to me until I saw him that night… the way he found me and without a second he had kicked the shit out of Connor and almost killed him…." She shakes her head.

She looks at me and I see tears glistening in her eyes, but not spilling. "The way he looked in my eyes while I was almost blacked out and just the way his brown eyes just stared back at me so coldly and said 'Its only me and you now, don't you dare leave me here all alone..' the way he said that, just… it's a hard thing to explain…" She trails off her voice thick. Like she's about to cry but she fits it off.

"He just… became everything I needed to live. I leaned on him so much it was pitiful. But then, he became again, what I needed. He became my father, friend and sergeant. He would drill me extensively. I would work out like I was a freaking soldier in real life. Then I would go to school where he would teach me about our business and then I would rest and do it all over again." She says with a hint of mechanical smile.

"Then… when he died… I fount my self even more lost. Before Charlie, I hadn't dared to touch anything unhealthy. Even before Connor all I would do was drink and sex was just a bonus on those rare days I could get her to comply with me." she says with a grimace and I know she means her ex girlfriend "not that it happened much. But when Charlie died everything just collapsed. I compare it to a damn." She says giving me a squeeze of the hand.

"When Charlie was alive… I had small cracks where water would seep out, when Connor happened… I got some more leaks but nothing world snapping just jet. But there was a steady flow of water seeping out of me. Those cracks where my mom and the rape. Then Charlie got cancer and he couldn't repair the holes anymore and seeing him die well… it added up and my damn busted a bit part of it but I still had a small part." She says

"I had the future, so I had a broken dam but I still had water in it, a small amount but still something. Then when the car hit my bike… well… its like someone just poisoned the watering hole. I still had the future but it was tinted with loneliness… not something I wanted exactly." She says and runs a hand through her hair.

"I held up for a long time, but I was slipping up… I was getting sloppy… the people visiting though I was getting dangerously depressed and assigned me anti depression pills. More drugs and a bigger high.. the world… the world had just given me my out. Because at that time I had started wandering in the alcohol section of my house after Charlie died. I would drink every night until I passed out. So much so that now I can drink one of my brands six-pack and not get drunk enough to fall on my ass." She says with a chuckle.

She squeezes my hand "And then one day… it was after the operation… after the accident. I was alone in my house watching tv when it finally sank in when I as watching a commercial for baby shampoo." She says laughing "can you imagine that? Shampoo made me realize, made it sink in that… I was really fucking alone. Without the future of having a kid of my own. I mean really, what man would want a woman who could never give him a son? I couldn't, I wouldn't condemn another person to suffer along side me not having a kid." She says shaking her head.

"Then, it just popped in to my head. Kill your self." She says so coolly that I freeze. "It just… popped in to my head and I was more then surprised when… I actually liked the idea. But I was to smart, people where to smart. If I killed my self, Jenks would get in trouble and my factory would be in danger. I don't know why I cared but I did… maybe if just a little." She says with a monotone.

It finally hits me that, that Bella considered killing her self. My lovely, sweet, humorous Bella really wasn't as harmless as she would act. She had a haunted part of her and she's showing me how dominant that part is in her real life. She's letting me in deeper to see her. She's showing me how she really is and… I don't know what to say about it. So I stay quiet and continue to listen as she starts speaking again.

She smirks to the thin air, a bitter smirk that leaves a bad taste in my mouth just too look at it. "Everything was falling in to place without me even knowing. Sex, Drugs, Alcohol and Pain. Every single thing came walking to me, I had never headed away from my course to get it. It must have been a sign from the God I had lost all faith to. His 'OK, just give up. It's just sad now'." She says and fixes her stair on me.

"You ask me, why I don't believe in God Alice. I'll tell you why, ill tell you exactly why and I wont give you a pretty little picture to cover the truth up. The all mighty God left me alone! When my mom was alive I would pray almost every night, when she died I prayed every night and morning. When the Connor incident happened, I would go to church almost obsessively. When Charlie was diagnosed, I donated a lot of fucking money to the Cancer program. I prayed all the time, I would wake up and pray, eat, pray, go to classes, pray, come home, pray, see Charlie, pray and pray and fucking pray." She says almost bitterly.

Her cold gaze locked with mine, I'm not strong enough to cut our gaze. "I would pray and beg to anyone that would be around. I would do anything if it meant there was a slim change Charlie would stay with me. But after a wile… he just got worse and my prayers lost emotion… I lost faith." She says softly.

"Then, the prayers stopped happening… I would just… wake up in despair and live like that the whole day –if you could have called that living- and just go to sleep exhausted. All my life I had been the nice little kid that would actually…" she trails off in a bitter laugh "I would actually **believe** that someone would save me. Even when Connor was raping me, killing me, because he had started to cut up my body with a knife. I had just kept praying to god. 'Please make him stop, please, please, please, please.' That was all that I could think off." She says chuckling

"But… God didn't show up. Every single time I needed him… he was gone. Of course I would push the though away. But when the Doctor told me that Charlie had less then a month to live… I couldn't absorb it. How could God take away the last person I had left? How could he just take everything away from me so suddenly. He turned his back on me… I returned the favor." She says with a little demented shrug.

I'm actually afraid… not for me but for Bella. Terrified of what could have happened to her. "But, hey… I'm still alive right? My perfect concoction didn't kill me… and it looks like someone up there either really hates me or really likes me because I'm still alive… and I'm rooting for the latter because some how… your in my life… like my personal little angel." She says and finally her eyes land on me and there warm.

There's a dark undertone in her smoldering eyes, that little haunted look in them but the pure emotion pouring off her is pretty breath taking. She offers me a ghost of a smile and I lean forward and rest my forehead on hers. I cup her neck with my hand and just stay still while I try and find my voice… my poor Bella…

Finally after a moment, I find my voice "Bella… my sweet, loving, Bella, im so sorry all of these things have happened to you, it hurts me to know all the pain that has been aimed at you and if I could I would take it away, you know I would. I love you and I admire you for being able to still stand up every day after everything that has happened to you. And… im so happy you trust me enough to tell me this but…" I trail off as a wave of pain flashes threw me.

"Please don't ever think about death or killing your self again… it just hurt to much to ever think of you not alive… I can't… I cant think about you lying cold in a coffin. Never seeing your smile or your eyes shine, never hearing your laugh… it hurts to much." I say quietly.

Bella chuckles lowly and hugs me to her and kisses my head a few times before she pulls back and cups my cheeks and looks me in the eyes "Alice, im not always the best person out there… and I wont promise you that it wont cross my mind but I can promise you that… for now, you have nothing to worry about… im not leaving you." she says and kisses my lips chastely.

I can't help the small unsettling I feel at her not promising me that it will be ok. That she won't off herself one day. But then again… Bella isn't one to think of the future, she lives her life by the day. And that is a bit scary sometimes but… its Bella. Its not something one can predict, but sometimes… its part of what I love about her.

She's unexpected and sets her own rules. Shes the bad girl that I just can't help loving. She grins at me and nods to the balcony what do you say to a walk around the tower of love?" She asks.

I nod, we both need a relaxing time after we had this talk. We're already dressed so Bella just grabbed the room key and her phone and cigs and we walked out of the apartment. We went to the floor under ours to go to Jenks room. She smirks at me before she starts banging on it really hard, not a minute later the door opens to reveal Jenks.

"I need your car key's… now." Bella say's to him. He frowns. "Why?" He asks. She glares a bit. "I just do." She says and Jenks face goes blank for a second before he sighs and walks back in to the apartment.

Bella chuckles to herself. "I can't be nice all the time or he will do that." She says lowly to me and I nod trying to fight the giggle. He comes back with his keys and he hands them to Bella. "Please don't get a ticked for driving like a maniac in the city." He sighs.

She nods. "Sure sure, see ya later Jenks." She says before turning around. He closes the door and she smirks and takes a piece of paper out of her pocket and looks around for a pen and finds one in a door in the corner of the hall.

She quickly scribbles something and slides it under the door to Jenks neighbor. And walks off giggling and motioning for me to follow. I frown "What did you do?" I ask. She smirks. "Nothing just wrote a piece of paper for the neighbor who I just happen to know is his date for tonight." She says and walks in to the elevator.

I smirk. "No shit?" I ask and Bella smiles when the door closes behind us. "Haven't I ever told you I love it when you curse." Bella says pulling me to her and kissing me senseless. I moan in to the kiss until she smirks and pulls away and hugs me. "Your love, your love, your love, is my drug." She whispers in my ears and I can't help the silly smile that breaks across my face.

**OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo**

Where walking hand in hand around the Eiffel tower eating ice cream and laughing at the mime Bella is currently making fun of. Well, no. She just challenged him to a mime off and it attracted a crowd of people who are laughing as Bella and the mime…. Lock each other in boxes?

Bella motions for me and I shake my head but she smirks and acts like she opens a door in the box and walks over to me and pulls me to her and kisses me. "Stupid mime, try doing this." She says smirking at him.

The mime frowns and starts to cry and Bella just chuckles and takes out a twenty and hands it to him. He smiles and …. Gives her some type of mime flower. All I know is that im laughing senseless.

Bella takes out a camera then and takes a picture with the mime and then makes me take a picture with him and then all of us take a picture with the mime. Then we spend about an hour or even more just taking pictures and really… Paris is amazing. She even insists on taking one of those boat rides… gondolas I think there called.

We spend the whole day practically hanging out and laughing. She teaches me a few words in French but I'm pretty sure their curse words because the guy on the gondola was laughing the whole time. With Bella smirking at him.

"Come on, say it. Trou du cul. Its easy.'' She says grinning. I sigh. "Trou du cul... wait, I know that means... its ass hole! You are teaching me curse words in french!'' I say laughing and Bella laughs. "Its easier to learn a language when you use words you know?" She offers.

I stick my tongue out at her and she chuckles. "Ok, try this one... Veux-tu m'épouser?" She says fluently. I frown. "What does that one mean?" I ask. Just then I realize that the sky is setting and the gondola is passing through a tunnel and just then and i see the Eiffel Tower light up just behind it, the setting sky.

"It means... will you marry me ?" She asks and when I turn my head to look at her she's smiling and holding out a box in her palm. I look down at it and I gasp, right there in a read velvet box... is a ring. Its beautiful with a white gold band and a heart shaped diamond. I stare at it for a moment, not exactly absorbing what is happening. Did Bella really just propose to me?... is she serious? I look in her eyes for a moment to see that she is serious and i can see the small nervous glint in her eyes. I look at the ring, this is really happening.

I look back at Bella to see her smiling softly at me her eyes smoldering, love is all i can see behind her eyes "Marie Alice Brandon Cullen, since the day i first saw you, you have changed my life for the better. Our fight a few days ago made me realize something big and its that... i cant imagine a life without you. Where just starting out but already I cant deny that I love you, would you make me the most privileged and happiest person alive and marry me?" she asks me again.

My mouth opens and closes until i find my voice "Bella... "

_**A/N : Wahahahaha ! im evil ! i love it, cliff hanger and one of you nailed it and guessed right ! **_iHumpAcow _**I bow my hat to you, you guessed it right. Next chapter will be co- written with A Thousand Undiscovered Stars**_, _**who's exited to know how this will unfold ?**_

_**Oh, and watever your guessing... it may or may not be that answer your expecting... good luck guessing the answer. REVIEW !**_

_The engagement ring ~_

_ . /imgres?um=1&hl=en&newwindow=1&tbo=d&tbm=isch&tbnid=vU-ppK0BNMOMKM:&imgrefurl= /tag/engagement-rings/&docid=THJpKkKBMKBWeM&imgurl= . &w=396&h=400&ei=zYexUMiMHZGk8gTQ6oE4&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=592&vpy=22&dur=1157&hovh=226&hovw=223&tx=192&ty=126&sig=102850824589159049992&page=6&tbnh=131&tbnw=155&start=76&ndsp=17&ved=1t:429,r:92,s:0,i:362&biw=853&bih=503_


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N: Lol, I'm evil I know. Wahahaahahah xD Let's see how this chapter turns out no? *smirk* it's a little bitter sweet but your all going to love it.**

SelinaShadow: Hey!, dude, ur name is long. Can I call you Undiscovered? Its shorter.

**A Thousand Undiscovered Stars: I suppose that's okay... Hey! If I'm undiscovered then people shouldn't know who I am, right?! [Quietly Panicking]**

SelinaShadow: Hmm… well, technically most people don't know who you are, cuz undiscovered isn't your real name. So, technically your safe… unless there Aliens in that case I suggest you run!

A Thousand Undiscovered Stars: Phew! Nope, no aliens! :D In that case, I guess we better let the people read the new chapter, huh? I had fun writing with you Selina; enjoy everyone! ;)

SelinaShadow: Awesome! And yeah, I bet their just dying to find out whats going to happen. I had fun writing with you two, cant wait to do it again. READ PEOPLE, READ!

WE DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT… BUT WE WISH WE DID!

Ch.36

Bpov

Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes, please say yes! I look her in the eyes as her mouth opens and closes until she manages to catch her brain with her mouth and she speaks "Bella… I-" I cut her off "I can make you happy, I can offer you anything and everything you will ever want or need. Hell, you won't want for anything. Just… please say yes…" I trail off quietly. She opens her mouth I KISSED A GIRL AND I LIKED IT! THE TASTE OF HER CHERRY CHOPSTICK! IT FELT SO WRONG, IT FELT SO RIGHT I HOPE MY BOYFRIEND DON'T MIND IT.

We both jump at the sound of my ring tone, but I ignore it. My eyes are on Alice, please answer my question. "Pick up the phone..." she says quietly. I shake my head "I want to know your answer… I'll love you anyway." I say just in case she says no. Please don't say no.

She opens her mouth again but this time it's her phone that goes off. She looks at me and then with a sigh grabs the phone. I hold her wrist. "Don't," I say quietly. She sighs. "It's my mom," she says before flipping it open.

I try to hold back the feeling of rejection. And go to close the ring box to stuff it in my pocket when her hand flashes out and she looks me in the eyes. And I break off the connection. A flash of pain ripples threw me and I look out to the water and Eiffel tower.

"Tell Esme I say hi," I mutter quietly, I hear Alice tell her mother that I said hi and I tune out her conversation as I try to manage my thoughts. I look over to the guy rowing the gondola and he just offers me a soft smile.

I rest my head back against the seat until I smirk, I look at my watch and see that we still have three hours till the fund raiser, we only need one to get ready and not even twenty minutes to drive to the hotel.

I stand on the gondola and peel off my jacket. I take off my watch, phone, cig and lighter and place it on the seat until I smirk at the guy on the gondola and I jump out of it and in to the freezing water.

I dive in deep in to the cool water and in there I let out a loud scream of frustration. After I have no air I swim back out of the water only to look at the gondola where the man is laughing and Alice is staring wide eyed.

"Tell Esme that the French water feels awesome." I say giving her a grin. She laughs "Mom, Bella just jumped out of the gondola and is swimming in the stream. She said to tell you that French water feels awesome… I don't know, she just jumped in the water!... what? I am not jumping in there with her!... fine, ha-ha bye mom, love you." Alice says.

I smirk as I start floating until I hear a crash of the water. I stay floating until I feel an arm around me and I held my breath as I was sunken down. I blink a few times as I wait for the bubbles to stop floating so that I can see her.

Then Alice is right in front of me and she kisses me hard and I kiss her back. I re surface and breath in a gulp of air and continue to kiss her. We don't stop kissing for a few minutes until I get tired of floating and I grab her hand and swim over to the gondola and tell the man to help her up.

After she's back in the boat he helps me up and I chuckle as I sit back down. Just then Alice picks up the ring case and opens it to look at the ring. "It's beautiful, Bella." She says quietly. I smile "And your breath taking… I thought it would remind you of me. My heart is sometimes cold and made of stone and it too is yours. You don't have to say 'yes' Alice… as long as you just don't say 'no' I'm happy… part of why I had a necklace come with it." I say as I pull the ring out and a chain fallows it.

I place the long necklace on Alice's head and the ring hangs around her neck and smile at her. "I still love you." I say and Alice smiles and shakes her head "You and your assumptions…" she trail offs kissing me.

I kiss her back and pull away "What's wrong with my assumptions?" I ask after a moment. Alice chuckles and brushes a few strands of wet hair from my face and I brush my thumb along her lips where water is still dripping from her hair.

"Because… it's a yes." Alice says her eyes burning in to mine. I can't help a smile that stretches across my face "Y-yes?" I ask in shock. She nods "Yes, Bella. I'll marry you." she says and I can't help myself I kiss her.

I kiss her for a long moment "I love you, I love you, thank you. Thank you. I promise you that you won't regret it. I'll give you everything, anything. Fuck, I'll give you the world if that's what you want." I say against her lips.

She giggles "How about you just kiss me? And love me?" she asks. I smirk and sigh. "Well, if I have too," I say rolling my eyes teasingly. She laughs and slaps my arm playfully. "Oh, shut up and kiss me," she says and I grin and lean forward and kiss her.

After a long moment, I pull back although I don't release my Alice. I can't believe she actually said 'yes'! I turn to the man, who is now smiling at the two of us, and tell him to take us back to where we started. I don't let go of Alice until we get there and we have to exit the boat.

"How much longer do we have until the fund raiser?" Alice asks as we head back to the hotel. I check my watch again. "We still have a little less than three hours," I say and suddenly I grin. "Which means we have plenty of time to celebrate before we have to get ready," I say and look over to see Alice's eyes smoldering at me. A shiver runs down my spine and I'm even more eager to reach the hotel and our room, now.

We reach the room and without much thought, we ravage each other. The only sounds coming from our room is our heavy breathing, moans and groans. Let's just say, I reversed what Alice had done to me. Shit, I love a submissive Alice.

After a long hour of just making love, I get a call from Jenks to get the fuck dressed. It was even funnier because his date had received my little note. I grin as I walk over to the closet and place Alice's black dress bag on the bed. And for once, I'm listening to Jenks and wearing a woman tux.

Partly because, I had a feeling a certain blond who if im not mistaken will try to either grope me, humiliate me or steal Alice. And I'll be fucking damned if the same day I get her to marry me is the same day she dumps me.

I get dressed quickly in my black woman tux, tie and red under shirt that matches Alice's dress perfectly. After I'm done with my hair, which reminds me. I need to get it cut! I do my make up and get fully dressed I walk out of the room and to the kitchen to see if I can find anything to snack on.

Hmm… I should probably make Alice something to eat, since I don't know if she will like all the food they will give down there. I sigh and click my tongue as I make my way back to the room only to stop dead in my tracks at the breath taking sight in front of me.

My beautiful Alice. I was still stunned that she said 'yes'. I smirked before walking up behind her. "Hold still for a moment," I requested, reaching up to unclasp the necklace that was around Alice's neck. Pulling it off, I removed the ring from the chain and turned her around to face me.

"May I?" I asked, reaching for her hand and smiling softly. She grinned and nodded, and I slipped the ring onto her ring finger before bringing it up and kissing her hand. "I love you," I said sincerely. Alice reached up to cup my cheek with her hand. "I love you, too, my Bella," Alice said softly and I grinned at her.

"I should probably warn you not to eat anything down there until I say it's safe. And if you just want to skip out early and eat at BK or something to tell me." I say offering her a smile. Alice rolls her eyes and said eyes wander down my body for an instant.

"You are so a butch." She jokes. I frown and shrug "I kind of am a Butch, but I do like tight jeans and low cut shirts. I'm the best of both worlds, darling." I say giving Alice a grin. She nods "You are, and you're mine." She says and I love how her heels make her just a half a centimeter higher than me and she pulls me to her by my tie.

We kiss chastely until I sigh and pull away, my eyes locked on her hazel pools until I can snap out of it again and take a deep breath. "Come on, we should head downstairs," I said, pulling her close to me and kissing her softly before leading her out the door and to the elevator. It didn't take long at all for us to reach the room that the fund raiser was being held in.

We reach it and instantly paparazzi start to snap pictures and call my name. I offer them a smile and stop for a few questions, most of them asking who Alice is. I jump from paparazzi to the next until Jenks shows up and pulls me away.

"Very good, Bella. Now they won't think you're a cold person anymore." He says and I chuckle as I pull Alice with me. "Now, who said I wasn't cold? I'm just being polite Jenks." I add in a teasing tone. He brushes me off and I look at Alice, she's quiet but her eyes are absorbing every single detail. Jumping from side to side with a small smile on her face.

As soon as I enter I am greeted by French dude, his real name is… fuck, I can't remember. "Ah! Le, Bella. How are's vous this evening?" he asks in a thick accented voice. I smile at him "I am fine, sir. And vous?" I ask politely. He smiles "Happy, sorti, I cannot believe the people that showed up, all for the little people!" he swoons still with that deep accent.

I nod and smile "Monsieur, this is my bientôt d'être l'épouse" I say. His eyes widen and he smiles brightly "Congrats to the both of you. May love prosper in vous." He says. After a few more words he leaves us and we walk to our table. "What does bientot deire leptuse?" Alice asks and I snort.

"Well that is just gibberish… what I said was bientôt d'être l'épouse. It means 'soon to be wife' darling." I explain and she nods. "Oh, cool." She says and I chuckle at her as I make my way to some men I really need to talk to.

Before I reach them I look at Alice and sigh, I don't want her out of my sight but… these men don't speak a word of English. "Alice, love. Why don't you go to the table where Jenks is and start some small talk?" I ask. She looks hesitant before she nods. She walks slowly and when she reaches Jenks I nod to him and he smiles before I walk over to the men.

Thirty minutes later these sons of a bitches won't let me go! I try my best but finally a woman comes and takes away one of the men and I use that as an excuse to get away from them.

I spoke a bit to Alice and introduced her to some fashion people who were hear and again got stuck in an investment discussion but I had Alice next to me and she would make me smile with her confused eyes flashing to me and to the person who spoke.

Twenty minutes with them I headed over to the table and we sat there while Mr. French dude gave a speech and he started giving out thank you's to the people who donated money. When my name escaped his lips I stood and waved around as people clapped and I sat back down with Alice and kissed her lips chastely.

After we ate diner, witch surprisingly was just some fancy pasta we struck up small talk with a small company who was wishing to invest some money so I started off telling them about stock and my company.

After a while I sighed and looked at Alice, she was standing next to the table with a small cup of wine in her hands as she looked around the room by the bottom of her eyes. She was with Jenks and his date…. Her name was Daisy something Santiago so I have no idea who she is.

I look back at the place where Alice was standing and skim past it and look back and freeze. Wait a sec…

I look back to Alice to see someone that makes my blood boil talking to her. And eye fucking her, the hell? ALICE IS MINE!

**Apov**

I smiled up at Bella, who is currently standing a few feet away trapped in a discussion of policy or something. I was over there but I had come over to get a drink and was waiting for the right time to just scoop her away. I spoke to some models and to some fashion designers that she had introduced me to but had left them to come over here and wait for Bella.

I smile to myself again, I was still so giddy and shocked that it was almost unbelievable. Bella... asked me to marry her. I felt like I was on cloud nine. All I wanted to do was pull her close and never let her go. Unfortunately, we still had a little while to go before we could leave.

I was about to go over to Bella and ask how much longer we had to stay down here, when I felt a hand tap my shoulder. I turned and found myself facing a young woman, maybe twenty years old. She was blond and she was dressed in a way that I couldn't help but compare to my sister Rosalie. However, while Rosalie actually does look beautiful without trying, this girl looked as if she was trying too hard to look beautiful and sexy, and it just wasn't working out.

I smile politely. "Yes?" I ask, wishing Bella would turn around and tell me that we could leave, now. The girl smiled, obviously trying to be seductive. "Forgive me, but May I say how stunning you look in that dress?" she asked, giving a smile that was a little too bright. I shifted somewhat uncomfortably. "Thank you," I say, smiling back politely.

She smiles with a hint of a smirk "So, can I know your name? or am I going to have to guess?" she asks flirting with me. I smile politely, damn it Bella get out of that discussion! "Alice." I say taking a sip of my wine. She nods "Unique and charming. Much like yourself. My name is Caroline." She says.

I nod once and take a sip of wine "I'm sorry, but I must ask. How exactly do you know Bella?" she asks. I frown but I nearly sigh in relief when I feel Bella loop her arm through mine.

"Caroline," Bella said coolly before leaning over to give me a kiss on the cheek. "Alice," she said warmly before turning back to face the blond now known as Caroline. "Bella, I was just saying how amazing your little Alice, here, looked. Why, she's exquisite, however did you manage to convince her to come here with you?" Caroline asks, not once looking away from me, her eyes now clearly shining with desire.

I feel Bella stiffen at my side and I almost wince. I know that Bella frequently feels like she doesn't deserve me, and this bitch isn't helping. "I honestly don't know," Bella replied coldly, clearly beginning to get irritated. Caroline didn't take any notice; otherwise she would realize that she is currently in very dangerous waters and would back off.

As it was, her murky green eyes slipped down my body slowly and I felt Bella clench her hands in fists before Caroline spoke. "Alice, would you care to join me for a dance? Maybe some other activity after? I'm sure that Bella wouldn't mind sharing... after all, she never does get very attached to any of her... escorts," Caroline said mockingly, glancing at Bella slyly.

I was the one to stiffen this time. "No, thank you. Bella and I are actually very attached to each other," I informed her, desperately hoping that she would let it go before Bella lost control. No such luck. Caroline's eyes flashed angrily before flashing towards Bella "She must be joking right? Who would ever want to date you?" she asks to Bella.

I'm surprised when Bella smirks "Only you and half of the school in the States. Just because you can't have me, does not mean the same for Alice." she say grinning. "Well, then I'll leave the two of you together. I only wanted to steal your 'deux cent putain,' or is she your salope ?" she laughed – I was shocked into silence. Did that bitch just call me a slut?... and a two cent whore? - before walking away, or trying to rather.

Bella swiftly released me before grabbing Caroline's shoulder and turning her so that she could grab her roughly "No, one. And I mean no one speaks to my Alice like that you understand you little bitch?" she barks out before she punches her – hard. Everything moved quickly after that. I couldn't tell what all had happened, but the next thing I knew Bella had Caroline on the floor. Caroline now had a ripped dress, a bruised face, and a wounded ego. Then, Jenks and another man hurried over to pull Bella off of Caroline. I, on the other hand, just stood where I was, my left hand coming up to cover my mouth.

All I can do is stare as Jenks calms Bella down, and I only look away from my love when I see bright flashes of light. I turn towards them, realizing too late that they were camera flashes. The paparazzi. Oh, shit...

Before I know what's happening, Bella's moved forward and is pulling me swiftly away from them, and behind her. "Go away, there is nothing to see here." She says rather loudly.

A man just steps closer and Bella still in her protective mode steps forward snatches the camera and aims it at him. She starts snapping pictures really quickly "Annoying, no? Fucking stop!" she yells at the man before throwing the camera at him.

She grabs my arm and with a hint of a grin, she pulls me close. She steals a look at Caroline who is on the floor being helped up by some man. Bella smirks and looks back at me and gives me a quick kiss before we quickly make our way out of the room.

Successfully avoiding the rest of the paparazzi - who were too absorbed snapping pictures of Caroline on the floor - we enter the first elevator that we reach. Thankfully, it's empty.

Once we're safely inside, Bella pushes the button for our floor before relaxing slightly. I lean forward and wrap my arms around her waist as I lay my head on her shoulder. "Are you hurt? Are you alright?" I ask quickly, my eyebrows drawing together worriedly, and Bella chuckles lowly as her arms come up to encircle my shoulders. "It's fine, Ali. I'm okay. What about you?" she asks and I smile a little. She's always so protective of me, and I love it. "I'm fine," I say softly, and we lapse into a comfortable silence.

After the elevator reaches our floor and we step out, I grab Bella's hand in my own while yawning. "Do you mind if we just get some sleep, right now? I just feel exhausted at the moment," I ask as we enter our room and I hear her chuckle quietly behind me. "No problem, beautiful. I think we need a full night sleep." Bella says easily, turning to give me a quick, soft kiss before pulling away and releasing me.

"No one call's the love of my life a whore and a slut and gets away with it. I promise you that." She says quietly and kisses me again. I just smile at her and hug her before we walk over to the room.

We undress and get ready for bed leisurely. I go into the bathroom and brush my teeth before I shut off the light and go into the bedroom. I smile a little when I see Bella already in bed waiting for me. She smirks softly at me, motioning me over, and I'm only too happy to comply.

I crawl onto the bed before sliding beneath the covers. Bella pulls me close to her, wrapping her arms around me as I snuggle into her, resting my head on her chest. I slip my left arm around her waist, but pull it back up a moment later. I turn my head a little as I hold up my hand and admire my ring once more. I feel Bella chuckle softly. "You really like it?" she asks quietly. I look up at her and smile at her teasing, yet somehow still slightly hesitant expression and I smile at her. "I love it," I assure her, not giving her a chance to respond before I lean up and kiss her.

A moment passes before I pull away and lay my head back on her chest and rewrap my arm around her waist, snuggling just a little bit closer to my Bella. "I love you," I say, yawning a little at the end, and I feel Bella sigh and kiss the top of my head. "I love you, too, Alice. Go to sleep, beautiful. I'll watch over you," Bella says softly, and her promise is the last thing I hear before I drift contently into a deep, peaceful sleep.

**0oOo0oOo0oOo0**

~A day later~

Esme pov

I smile, humming a nameless tune as I make my way through my house, tidying up as I go. All of the kids are outside with my husband, enjoying the rare sunny weather while I air out the house and wait for lunch to be done.

I frown, then. I can't wait for Alice to return. I was a bit nervous about sending her to Paris with Bella, especially considering the talk that Carlisle and I had with our daughter before she left. I shuddered slightly. It disturbed me to think of my baby girl having sex with anyone. I had always known that the day would come, but... I shook my head, smiling wryly. I had to admit, though. Bella is a lovely young girl, despite all that she's been through. She seems to be a very upfront person, I thought to myself, continuing through the house.

I stopped when I reached the coffee table. I hadn't gone through the mail yet, today. I flipped through the small pile, dropping each one back on the table as I go through and see what's there. Bill, bill, advertisement, Alice and Bella, bill, wait!... What?!

I quickly pick up the magazine that I had dropped. What's Alice doing on the cover of a magazine… with Bella glaring at the camera? I frowned, but I didn't see anything particularly worrying. She seemed okay, just surprised. Then... I noticed it. Alice had her hand over her mouth, her left hand and it wasn't bare as I expected it to be...

Shock went through me, along with a large dose of worry and concern. No, that's not possible, but I see it with my own eyes. There, on Alice's ring finger on her left hand, is a white-gold ring with a heart-shaped diamond. My little girl is wearing an engagement ring. Oh. Hell. No.

I take a deep breath to calm myself, fixing a small smile on my face as I move towards the back door. I stick my head out. "Carlisle, darling, would you mind coming inside for a moment?" I ask, forcing myself to speak normally. He looked up at me and smiled, before following me back inside.

I turned to face him once we reached the kitchen. He had a smile on his face and he appeared slightly curious, though currently unworried. "What is it, Esme?" he asked calmly. Oh, Carlisle... "This," I stated worriedly, handing the magazine that I still held firmly in my hand. "What's this?" he asked looking down and seeming just as shocked as I had been to see our daughter on the cover. "Esme?" Carlisle asked, but I didn't respond, waiting for him to see it. I knew the moment he had, because the magazine dropped from his hand and his mouth dropped open slightly.

All of my panic rushed through me, again. I was silent for a second, but I couldn't take it anymore. "What is Alice thinking? What is Bella thinking?" I exclaimed worriedly. "She's so young... She hasn't even graduated high school, and now she's engaged?!" I said and that seemed to snap my husband out of his daze. He looked up and I could see the worry and irritation on his face, though it softened when he looked at me. "Hush, darling. We're going to deal with this. Maybe…. Maybe where just mal informed?" he asks.

I shake my head "For goodness sake's Carlisle. A ring on the left ring finger? Its an engagement ring!" I say exasperatedly at my husbands denial. He sighs and rubs his chin deep in concentration "I thought that Bella would be good for Alice, and she certainly seems like she loves our daughter. But... This is moving too fast. Maybe they're not as good together as we thought, if they're foolish enough to want to marry so young…" Carlisle sighed, wrapping me in his arms. I felt a small sense of doubt, but it was overridden by the relief and absolute agreement that I was feeling.

"Yes," I agreed a bit sadly, "It looks like Bella isn't how we though she is..." I sigh, how could anyone think of marriage so young? "We need to put a stop to this. They're clearly not ready to be in such a serious relationship if they're moving so quickly," I say sternly. I thought that when we talked to Alice several days ago, we had impressed upon her the importance of being mature about taking such large steps, but apparently not...

"Come now, darling. Calm down. Everything will be alright, and we'll call and deal with the situation." my husband said decisively and I wholeheartedly agreed with him. Oh, Alice... What have you gotten yourself into? I asked silently, wishing my daughter were here with me now instead of on a different continent. I shook my head slightly as Carlisle and I separated. Alice...

What has gotten in to you? what are you thinking? I sigh and grab the magazine and find an article with even more pictures… it's a fund raiser for a French charity and Bella is the main topic.

_"The young business woman, Isabella 'Bella' Swan Volturi, was caught fighting at the huge Children Charity, event for the orphans in France. The fight took place right after the girl had stood to accept praise for her 10,000 donation. For witch also made her the biggest donor of the event. _

_Sadly, her generous donation was not what made her the talking point of this charity. It was the huge blow out fight she had with her ex Caroline Underwood. Informants say that the on again off again young couple for two years have fought in these events before and that it was not a shock, but what was is that it came to blow's when said girl insulted Bella's girlfriend. The exact words where not retrieved._

Isabella's girlfriend- who is currently un-identified- was seen leaving the ball room with Bella quickly after. Isabella was also seen wearing her trade mark smirk after the fight and even gave her girlfriend a victory kiss. But, the fight was not what stopped everyone cold after the fight. It was the girlfriend or should we call her fiancé?

Bella had quickly parted from the fight and took a protective stance in front of her girlfriend and quickly all anyone could focus on was the huge diamond on her finger. Is the young successful business woman ready to settle down before she's even lived?

This is what her guardian said when asked about the engagement "It's their life and her money. She can use it as she wishes. Bella for as young as she is, always knows what she wants. Let's just hope they can be happy, no?" he says smiling like a proud father.

We asked around and all anyone could say was that they were happy for the young girl to settle down, even at her young age. A person, who will stay unnamed had this to say "That girl has had her fair share of grief and women. Its time she settles down and lives happily." When asked to explain the statement, the person fled from the area.

So, what more can we say for the young Isabella 'Bella' Swan Volturi, let's just hope this one lasts."

I frown… fair share of woman?... what is that supposed to mean? Hmm… "Rosalie, darling. Can you come in here for a second please?" I call out to her as I hide the magazine in the junk drawer. "Yeah, mom?" she asks as she steps in to the room.

I look up and see her bright smile on her face and I can't suppress my own at seeing my daughter so happy. I sigh, "Darling, I was at the market and I overheard Mrs. Stanley say something a bit crewel about Bella… I was just wondering. Did Bella date many people before Alice?" I ask smiling at her.

I look at Rosalie's eyes. She always had a tell for lying, she would look up and down but never focus on me when she was lying a habit I had not told her about. "Well, I mean. She has lived here for a long time mom. I guess she dated her fair share of people before she met Alice." She says looking up and down. I frown "Are you lying to me young lady?" I ask sternly.

Rosalie's eyes grow wide and she bites her lip and sighs "Not exactly… Mom, I'll tell you but… you can't tell Alice I was the one who told you, ok?" she asks smiling sadly. I frown, what could Bella have done to cause such a reaction from Rosalie?

"Bella used to be a bit of a… a player before she met Alice." Rosalie says. I frown "A player? What does sports have to do with anything?" I ask her definitely confused by my daughter's words.

She chuckles a bit and smiles at me "Mom, a player is someone that… that plays with, people. Dates a lot of people and hence plays with their emotions, hence ' a player'." She says looking directly at me.

I nod a few times "You don't think that she would play with Alice. Now would you?" I ask her now worried even more. Rosalie's eyes grow wide and she shakes her head "No, no. I mean, I had my doubt's at the beginning of their relationship. But, Bella has changed a lot since she met Alice. She's… she's really different, Mom. She would never play Alice… I don't think she's capable of doing that." She says looking in my eyes again.

I nod a few times and offer her a smile "Okay, then. Run along, tell the boys lunch will be ready soon." I say patting Rosalie on the shoulder. She grins at me and turns with a grace of a dancer as she walks out of the room.

Once she's gone I frown and place my hand over my chest "Alice… who did you let in to that heart of yours?..." I ask m self softly as I turn and start making sandwiches for lunch.

All the while, my mind flying a mile a minute hopping that we're doing what's best.

_**A/N: Don't hate us! Its actually a pretty cool change in the story line, don't 'cha think? Review!**_


	37. Chapter 37

_**A/N: Just in case your wondering. Bella and Alice got engaged, but it's a loooooooong engagement. So, don't worry. Alice and Bella understand its early but I though it was kind of obvious that it would be a long engagement. Sorry if I worried you all.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch.37**_

_**Bpov.**_

I barely sleep, my mind is running a mile a minute. My plan is to take Alice to the Pont des Arts bridge where the tradition was that one would buy a pad lock it against the fence and then throw the key in the Seine river.

I'm planning on making it a hole day thing, taking Alice shopping, sight-seeing, to a nice lunch, then more shopping and then dinner and going to sleep. Just a calm evening, nothing big. I just want to spend some time with my fiancé.

I gave up on sleep after I woke up for the fourth time this night, its 6:38 am just the right time to wake up and get dressed. I take a quick shower and get dressed in jeans, sneakers and a nice V-neck.

I look back to the bed to see a sleeping Alice. I scribble a quick note and place it on my pillow before slipping out of the room quietly. I walk down the hall and in to the elevator before I push the button for the floor under this one.

Once that door opens I step out and walk down the hall and look for 48G once I find it I knock on it two times and lean against the wall. The door opens quickly and im pulled inside.

I sigh and run a hand through my hair. "How bad is it?" I ask. Jenks chuckles bitterly. "Well, you got all the papers buzzing, that's for sure." He snaps. I glare at him, is he forgetting who the hell he is talking to?

"You may be my guardian but I am still your boss. Watch the damn tone."I growl out before walking over to the living room where there are piles of magazines on them. I flip through them quickly.

I spend about half an hour just reading through articles after articles until I groan and massage my temple. "How many people dropped from our list of clients?" I ask. Jenks quietly clicks threw his laptop and sighs "Thankfully, none. In fact you gained… five new clients." He mumbles.

I smirk but my head pounds and it fades into a grimace. "The bitch managed to land a lucky blow that's for sure." I mutter as I feel around my scalp until I find a bump and wince. Jenks chuckles as he stands from next to me and goes to the kitchen.

"Take these." He says smiling as he hands me a bottle of aspirin and a bottle of water. "Thanks." I say giving him a smile.

He grins. "We're never ones to stay mad at each other long, are we?" He asks and I suppress a laugh. "No, no we're not." I say smiling at him. He sighs happily. "You really are so much like your father." He says.

I shrug. "Didn't know I had a kid lost in the world and didn't bother telling my family about it." I say to him. He sighs. "Have you read the letter?" He asks. I sigh. "Nope, I was planning on reading it when I get back. I didn't want to get myself depressed before my vacation." I say.

Jenks nods. "Understandable. But, how do you know or better yet. Why do you think that letter says that?" he asks me. I smirk. "Lets face it, my dad was a big man. But he lost his balls when it came to me. He would never admit something like this to my face." I say with a shrug.

Jenks sighs. "Where is your fiancé?" He asks smiling. I chuckle. "Asleep in our room. I didn't want her to know about this." I say motioning to the magazines. I stand up and stretch my stiff muscles.

"I better go get some breakfast for Alice and I." I say and Jenks smirks before motioning for me to follow him to the kitchen. He takes two brown paper bags and hands them to me.

"I had them sent here. I just knew you would show up. Have a nice day, Bella." Jenks says. I nod "Same to you, uncle Jenks." I say and with a kiss to the cheek I walk out of the room.

Once I reach my and Alice's room I am captured in a hug. I chuckle as I walk over to the coffee table and place them their. I look down at Alice who is still hugging me. "I was worried, I didn't know where you where when I woke up." She mumbles.

"Didn't you get the letter I left you?" I ask. She nods "I did, but you didn't put where you were going. I just worried." She says. And I kiss her forehead "I just needed to speak to Jenks for a bit, nothing more." I say.

She nods and I shift so that I can hug her. I snuggle my head in her small neck before sitting down. I open the bags and give her a coffee and donuts, we eat quickly. After that I take Alice and wait until she gets showered and dressed.

We make our way to the plaza where our limo is waiting and as I suspected paparazzi are around. I put my arm around Alice's shoulders before I continue walking. "When is the wedding?" A guy asks. "Whats her name?" "Isabella, how will you manage a business and a wife?" He asks.

I open the car for Alice before looking at the paparazzi. "Her name is Alice and I'm planning on it being a long engagement. For God's sake, we're in high school. I just proposed because I wanted to show her that I want to keep her forever." I say before slipping into the car and the driver pulls off quickly.

"I want you forever two." She says quietly. I steal a glance at Alice before laughing. "After all this time, your still shy, even now." I chuckle. She pokes me stomach. "I have reasons for my actions." She mumbles.

I smirk. "Good, at least that makes one of us." I mumble before I slide my hand to her thigh and start to rub up and down every single time getting closer. "Fuck, Bella." Alice mumbles and I smirk and shrug.

"Fine." I say and cup her by the crotch of her pants. Alice moans softly and I smirk before I move my hand away from her. "Tease." Alice says and I laugh. "Your just finding that out?" I ask.

She sighs but shakes her head. "No, I knew this from the beginning, I just find no reason to act about it now that we are to be wed." She says. I roll my eyes at her. "You just love to act don't ya?" I ask.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." She says and I lean on the chair. "If 'ya say so." I mumble. Once we reach the mall Alice goes in to a frenzy. Making me try things out every once in a while.

After we're done and we eat lunch I take her to the bridge and take out a lock with a key. "What are we doing?" Alice asks eyeing the lock. I smile. "There's a tradition that two lovers use a pad lock and lock it around a fence. It symbolizes love and then they throw the keys in the river under the bridge. That symbolizes that you leave it up to fate." I say as I walk over to the bridge hand in hand.

Quickly all I can see are locks after locks on the fence. It's quite pretty. I kiss Alice on the head. "Choose where we put it." I say to her and she entwines our fingers before she leads me to a far end and looks at the wall until she smiles and walks over, me in tow.

We lock it around the fence and then I tow her to the edge of the bridge and together we throw the key over our shoulders and into the water. Then I turn her to me and we share a sweet long kiss.

After that we go back to shopping and then to the hotel where I leave Alice there because Jenks called me in a sudden meeting. After I kiss her goodbye I go to the boring meeting. After about two hours, its extended.

We keep talking about stuff, investments, associations, deals, trading and markets. Before I know it, the meeting stretched out until midnight. Which isn't strange seeing as we started this meeting at 6pm.

I shuffle my way out and to our room. I slip into the room and walk over to the couch where I drop the stupid brief case Jenks was so kind to give me. I shrug out of the business blazer and I tie my hair in a ponytail.

I walk over to the fridge and grab a can of coke, a cup, ice and a bottle of 42. After I made my high alcohol drink I walk over to the balcony and light up. The smoke calms me and the drink helps me relax my muscles.

After I'm done I make my way back to the room and take of my shoes. Then I change into my sleeping wear and slip onto the bed. Almost instantly I feel Alice turn and snuggle closer to me.

I open my eyes a bit to see her looking back at me, I laugh. "Freak, you're watching me sleep." I mumble. She breaks into a laugh, "So, did not. I knew you were awake." She says.

I nod and she grins. "Had fun?" she asks. I grimace. "Lets just say I can't wait to get out of here tomorrow. I mean, I love my job. But I hate rude French people." I say and she laughs.

I touch my lips to hers and sigh. "Go to sleep darling. Tomorrow we just relax and enjoy the last night in the city of Paris." I say Alice sighs. "Its going to feel so weird not waking up next to you." Alice mumbles.

I chuckle. "Oh, don't worry, I'll just sneak into your room at night just to snuggle." I mumble. Alice giggles. "I'll hold you to that." She says. I nod and spooning Alice I fall to sleep quickly and exhausted.

Sometimes life is better when its this simple.

_**A/N: hope you guys like the relaxing chapter. I just wanted to make this settle down a bit.**_


	38. Chapter 38

_**A/N: Here it is, now, I don't have anything big to write yet so… blah.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch.38**_

_**Bpov**_

I stop the car and look to the side to a sleeping Alice. I reach out a hand and shake her gently. "Alice… Alice, baby wake up. Your home." I say and she groans and shakes her head. "W-what?" She asks yawning.

"Baby, your home. Get up." I say chuckling. She jumps a bit in her seat. "I fell asleep? For how long?" She asks. I shrug. "An hour, maybe two?" I say with a shrug. She frowns. "Why didn't you wake me up, you must have been so bored." She says to me.

I smirk at her. "Oh, I was having a blast. Especialy when you started moaning in your sleep. So, tell me. Am I better in real life or in a dream?" I ask smirking as I lean back in my seat looking at her.

She blushes and gasps out a laugh. "Oh, um… I. Your better in real life." She mumbles and I suppress my laugh and nod. "Really? Because by the way you were moaning… I'm not sure. I must know, what were you dreaming about, my little Alice?" I ask leaning closer.

My face is still normal, it would look curious to her. She looks in my eyes and then my lips and gulps and bites her lip, does she know that her biting her lip drives me crazy? "God, this is embarrassing." Alice mumbles. I snort at her. "Yeah, tying me up and fucking me like a bunny no big deal. Telling me about your wet dream, le gasp!" I say with an eye roll.

Alice blushes and chuckles at me. "Stupid." She mumbles before sighing. "It was just a simple dream. Us in that meadow of yours… its nothing. I don't even know why I had that dream, I pretty much forgot about it. We haven't been there in so long!" She says.

I think about it for a moment and lean forward and kiss her in the way that told her I wanted more. She knots her hands in my hair as I push her against her door, me leaning over the center console.

I break away from her lips and look in her lust filled eyes. I breath heavy before shaking my head, touching my lips to hers gently and break away from her quickly and with a wink I walk out of the car and open the trunk.

Alice gets out quickly. "Tease." She mumbles pushing against my hip with her own and giggling when I do it back. "Always, beautiful." I say smiling as I grab one of the supper heavy suitcases.

I huff a bit but carry it over to the porch. "Alice, would you mind not staring at my ass and going inside and asking your brothers to help me out?" I ask her. She giggles. "How did you know I was staring at your ass?" She asks. I laugh. "Your predictable, love." I say. She sighs. "Fine, I'll go to my brothers." She says walking next to me.

I yelp a bit when she squeezes my ass and I gap at her. "Mary Alice Brandon Cullen what has gotten into you." I chasten teasingly and she stops and shudders. "God, never call me by my full name. You sound like my mother… such a turn off." She says with a smirk as she sways her hips and walks in to the house.

"MOM, DAD, ROSALIE… STRONG WELL BUILT OLDER BROTHERS! I'M HOME!" She yells and I can't help but laugh a bit as I make my way over to the car and light up as I retrieve another suitcase.

I stop half way to pull the cig out of my mouth to flick the ash at the end of it when I see someone walking over to me. I look up and smile when I see it's Jasper. "Hey, Jazzy." I say smiling. He rolls his eyes and hugs me. "Welcome back, Bella. We missed you, our lives are so much more boring without you and Alice." He says and I laugh.

I slide out of his hug and take a step back and shrug. "I am awesome, but hey, I'm back." I say taking another drag. He chuckles and huffs when he grabs the suitcase and looks at me wide eyed. "What did you buy for the girl?" He asks. I smile. "Everything she wanted." I say and he smiles softly and rolls his eyes.

"Alright, alright." He says walking back as I turn to grab another suitcase, -she had bought four. Two of which where already in the porch.- when I am lifted up and spun from side to side in a bear hug.

I chuckle. "Bella, I missed you!" Emmett booms and I laugh. "Missed you two Em." I say and I hear laughs when he just keeps hugging me and dosen't let me go. "Hey, Em. Don't break my girl." Alice calls and he chuckles and drops me slowly.

"Fine, so did you bring me anything?" He asks. I laugh, he is so a kid in a man's body. "Yes, Emmett we bought you a present. It's in my bag." I say as I tell him to take the last two suitcases over to the porch and grab my carry on bag.

We all make our way inside the Cullen house as the rain starts to fall and as soon as we are all seated. I am greeted by a hug from Rosalie and a tight smile from Carlisle and Esme isn't in the room yet.

I frown and shrug it off and open my book bag to grab a wrapped box and throwing it over to Emmett. He rips the colorful paper off and grins. "Awesome!" He yells and rips open the box of French Fireworks.

I had to slip those in my suitcase but I took them out as quickly as I got in the car not wanting them to get crushed. I took out a two boxes and handed them to Rosalie. "A French scarf and a nice perfume for 'the Rosalie'." I say with a smirk. She offers me a smile. "Thank you, 'the Bella'." She says with a smirk and I laugh.

I shuffle through my bag again and grin. "I feel like Santa." I say as I grab a few books and walk over to Jasper. "For Jazzy, books about the French war." I say knowing that he is a nut for anything war related. He grins. "Thanks Bella." He says and I smile as I look in my bag again.

"For Eddie, a list of French compositions that I found at an antique shop." I say and handing him a filled piano song book. He smiles. "Thank you Bella, you didn't have to." He says and I brush him off.

I look up when Esme walks in to the room and sits next to Carlisle on the loveseat. Strange… she didn't even say hi. Hm… maybe Emmett played in her garden again. I grab a frame in my hands and pull out a painting that I had a young artist make for Carlisle. It was of the Eiffel Tower at Twilight. He being an art enthusiast I thought he would like it. "I bought this for you, Carlisle. It was made my a young local artist, in my opinion he will be a great artist one day." I say handing him the framed small painting.

Carlisle smiles kindly at me. "Thank you, Bella. I appreciate it." He says looking at the painting. I smile and grab the last box in my book bag. A jewelry box. I hold it out for Esme. "I saw it in an antique shop, I know how you like the Victorian Style jewelry so I bought it for you." I say handing her the necklace box.

She flashes me a small smile. "Thank you, sweetheart." She says quietly and I flash her a smile. I turn back to Alice and sit down for a moment before my phone beeps and I groan as I fish it out.

I smile sheepishly at the Cullen's. "Sorry, I have to take this call." I say and Alice frowns. "Work again?" she asks. I shrug. "Their trying to get used to me not being around again." I say before kissing her forehead and snaping the phone open.

"Bella Swan." I say as I walk out of the room. "Bella, its me Jenks." He says. I nod. "Yeah, I guessed that much. Now, what's up? I just got back." I say stepping out of the house and to the front yard, liking the drizzle that falls over me.

"I know, I'm sorry. But, there are some contracts that I just don't know wether to sign or not. Then I need your signature on them and after that I need to know where you put the file with our new client list." He says.

I sigh and run a hand through my hair. "The client list is in the left drawer of your desk. The contract you should accept is the one with the filled legal work, there are three contracts only two are completed. The other is to be sent back to the company in Russia so that they can review over it and tell us if they are interested in the year long contract." I say to him.

There's the faint sound of shuffling paper on the other end until theres a sigh of relief. "Okay, now the matter still stands. What should I do about the contracts that need your signature?" He asks. I roll my eyes. "Mail them to me. Express mail, it gets here the next day." I say and there's a shuffling before a muttered. "I'll send them now. Oh, I also sent you some reunion emails you will need to read and answer back to."

"I'm sorry to spring this on you, especially after you just got back. But I really need your help until I get back to Itally and take charge of the company." He says to me and I frown, I don't want him to keep doing that… "Fine, I'll get to them now. I just need to tell Alice I'm leaving." I say before I hang up.

I sigh and run a hand through my hair, it's my company. Jenks shouldn't be taking charge of anything. I don't like the idea of anyone besides me sitting in my office, my fathers office. Hell, not even Jenks is allowed there. He is in the VP room right next to it.

I sigh as I walk back in to the house. Alice isn't going to be happy about this, I walk in to the room and just look at Alice and she frowns. "You have to go, don't you?" She asks. My eyes go wide. "How did you… never mind… yeah, I'm sorry babe. Jenks isn't back at the office so the people are going a bit crazy without the two of us there." I say sheepishly.

She sighs "But you just got back from a trip, can't they just hold it off for a little while longer?" She asks frowning. I hug her to me and sigh. "I wish, but no. If they hold it off I can get in some serious back track. I'm sorry Alice, I'll make it up to you. I promise." I say kissing her forehead.

She sighs in surrender. "It's ok. I'll see you tomorrow at school." She says and I smile and touch my lips to hers in a chaste kiss, I'm not ignorant to the eyes staring at us. "Bye, love. I'll see you tomorrow, I'll pick you up for school. Love ya." I say before turning to look at the Cullen's.

I smile at them and scratch my neck. "Sorry, guys. I would love to stay a bit longer but I really need to get some paper work done. Have a nice evening." I say smiling to everyone before Alice speaks up. "I'll walk you out." She says and I nod. We walk quietly until we reach my car.

"Baby, I really am sorry. This is partly why I wanted to drop school and go full time at work." I say quietly. "Bella, lets not have this argument again please?" She asks and I nod slowly as I lean back on my car and she pins me there before she kisses me.

I wrap her in a hug and pull her closer to me as I lick her bottom lip asking for entrance. "Bella.." She moans quietly as she breaks the kiss for a second to breath and then we connect our lips again and our tongues meet.

We kiss soundlessly for a minute or two before my fucking phone beeps. I growl. "Mother fucker." I mumble as I search for my phone and answer it "What do you want?" I snap at Jenks. He's quiet for a moment. "I interrupted something, didn't I?" He asks. I respond with a biter laugh. "No, not at all. Now what the fuck do you want? I said I was on my way to the house to get started." I state to him.

"I was just wondering if you wanted me to send the client list with the contracts so you know what company is going to be reciveng what." He mumbles quietly and suddenly I feel like crap. I rest my head on Alice's shoulder as I pull her to me with one hand. "Yes, Jenks. I would appreciate it. Thank you for being so thoughful." I say. "It's all right, call me when you get back to your house and have read the emails." He says and I reply quietly and we hang up.

"I really have to go… but I really don't want to. How am I supposed to go to sleep if I don't have your warm body against mine? How am I to wake up without my angel?" I ask her quietly.

Alice hmm's quietly and kisses my neck a few times before she pulls back. "Tell me about it. I feel the exact same way, I'm so used to waking up in your arms." She says running a hand against the lenth of my arms. "How can I wake up withoug your strong, protective, warm arms around my body…" She says looking at the invisible patterns she's tracing against my inner arms.

My eyes flutter wanting to close at the sensation and her words. "Without your warm body against mine… your hot breath against my neck while I wake up." She says cupping my cheek with her delicate, soft and warm hands. I feel my eyes flutter shut at the feeling of her warm hands on my cheek.

"Alice… your killing me here." I say in a strained voice. "It's killing me to say goodbye." She whispers and I smile a bit at her, I feel it too. The small hallow feeling just in the middle of my chest that can only be concealed when I have her in my arms. I can feel it teasing the edges of my heart.

I put her hand to my chest over my heart and open my eyes a bit. "We just have to wait until the end of the semester, then we have summer. And… when it gets here, I'm going to take you away. How do you feel about going to Puerto Rico? Nice, tropical, good food, nice people. It would be a perfect place to spend time together." I say and she nods and I touch my lips to hers quickly.

I raise her hand and kiss the inside of her wrists, "Bye, love." I say and after a touch of her lips I hug her before I slip into my car. She walks back to her house and after she gets to the door I drive down the lane and to the street.

**~5 hours later / 11:00pm~**

I toss and turn on the bed before I throw the blaket off me and sit on the bed. I smirk at my fucking patheticness, I miss her. I miss having Alice in my arms. I light up right then and there when an idea pops in to my head. I smile as I quickly throw on a hoodie, sneakers grab my keys and cell phone before I dash out of my house.

Instead of walking down the drive I take the right and head to the woods. I take slow, lazy drags until I finish the cigarette and put it out and continue walking. I walk for ten minutes until I reach the back yard of the house I wanted.

I let my eyes scan over the house and see that its pitch black dark. I take my phone out and quietly call Alice. She picks up on the second ring. "Hey, babe. I miss you." She says. I smile. "Can't sleep can you?" I ask.

She groans, "No I can't, and I blame you." She says and I can see the figure on her room stand and flick the lights on. I smirk. "And why would you ever do that?" I ask. Her response is almost instant. "Because, you make yourself so… fucking addicting. I can't help but miss being around you, your like a drug. And I can't wait to get my next fix." She sighs and I see her throw herself on her bed.

"Well then, call me a dealer." I say as I step out of the trees and quietly walk over to the side of the house under her balcony where ironically there is a side fence for Esme's flowers.

"Why would I call you a dealer?" She asks and I hmm as I make my way up as quietly as possible. Once I'm up I jump on to her balcony and smirk at her. "Look out your balcony." I say and instantly her head snaps and she jumps a bit before she relaxes and smiles at me as she makes her way over and opens the door.

"Bella." She says slipping her phone in her pocket while I do the same. I smile. "Would it be to corny to admit that I miss having you sleep in my arms and that I couldn't wait another moment to see you? Because if it is, I so didn't say that." I say with a smile.

Alice chuckles. "No, not corny at all. Sweet, yes. But 'The Bella Swan' is not corny." She says with a smile and I chuckle as we walk into her room, closing the balcony door behind me. "What are you doing here? Besides wanting to see me and making me fall in love with you a bit more?" She asks.

I smile. "Well, you couldn't sleep. I couldn't sleep. It needed to be fixed and the only way I can sleep is if I'm holding you and the only way you can sleep is if I'm holding you. So, I thought we could help each other out." I say with a shrug.

Alice nods a few times before she moves forward and unzips my jacket and pulls it away from my body. She hugs me and runs a hand over my black T-shirt. Before she turns off the light of her room and directs me to her bed.

After she makes sure the door is locked and the curtains are drawn I put an alarm for 5am, I need to be out of here before Carlisle wake sup at 5:30am. I take off my shoes and slip under the covers before pulling Alice with me and wraping the blanket around her and my arms around her waist pulling her impossibly closer to me.

Instead of her snuggling into my neck how I expected, she kisses me. I smile against her lips as I close my eyes and kiss her slowly back. After a few minutes I pull away licking my lips and resting my forehead on hers.

"So, my lovely fiancé. When do you want to tell your parents we are engaged?" I ask in a gravelly tone. "Not until some time has passed, I don't want them to think its just some crazy rebellious teen thing." She says.

I frown and I wonder… "Isn't it?" I ask. She opens her eyes. "Hmmm?" She asks. I offer her a small smile. "Isn't it just some crazy rebellious teen thing?" I ask quietly. Alice smiles softly at me and whispers back. "No, its not. It's a madly in love thing that no one will ever understand unless they experience it." She whispers.

I feel my heart melt. "I'm happy you could make me experience it." I whisper to her. She smiles. "And I'm happy that you let me." She says and our lips touch in a stilled kiss. We don't move our lips.

We just want to feel close, we don't want to make out. We just want to feel our love and the warmth it brings to us. We're just cherishing our company and basking in our love and I couldn't be more grateful.

I pull back from her and push her shoulders down and to me. "Good night, my love." I whisper in her ear as I rest my head on the back of her neck and hear her say softly to me. "Good night, my Bella." And I snuggle in to her warm body. Yup, I'm so whipped and I couldn't be happier.

We fall asleep quickly and have pleasant night sleep until my phone buzzes in my poket waking me up. I sigh and take it out to see its my alarm. I frown and look at my sleeping Alice. I disentangle myself from her and slip on my shoes and grab my hoddie from the floor.

I grab a notepad she has and write her a quick note telling her why I'm not going to be there when she wakes up. I tell her that I love her and that I will pick her up for school before placing it on her night stand under her phone.

I wrap the blanket around her and kiss her head three times before I walk over to the balcony door and sneak outside. No one is on the next balcony so with a smile I close the glass door and I climb over the railing and to the crisscross white fence coverend in flowers.

After I reach the floor I run a hand over my eyes and check my watch. 5:15am. Shit, 15 minutes before Carlisle wakes up. I jog quickly over to the forest edge. I look back at the house and frown when I feel an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach. I frown and shake my head.

I must be hungry. I look over the house again and with a shrug I jog back to my house. Once I reach my house I go to the bathroom and brush my teeth and head over to the gym. I work out for another half an hour and then I go to the kitchen and grab something to eat.

After I ate I take a shower and get dressed. After I'm ready I grab my motorcycle keys and slip on my jacket as I walk out of the house. I open the garage and slip on my favorite black and red full face helmet and quickly turn on the bike.

I speed off down the drive and then to the street. I slow down when I reach the house and park the motorcycle in a corner of the clearing. I push down the stand and get off the bike and take off my helmet.

I shake my hair out and place the helmet on the seat before I walk up the stairs and knock on the door. It opens quickly revealing a happy Alice. She hugs me and I chuckle as I hug her tightly and kiss her forehead.

"Morning, beautiful." I say. She smiles. "Morning." She says as she lifts up on her toes until she kisses my lips. "Come on in, I was having breakfast." She says as she leads me to the kitchen.

I stop for a moment when I'm smaked with the smell of pancakes and syrup, coffee, eggs, bacon. The smell quickly flashed me back to a similar time in my past. When my mom was still alive and would cook breakfast for me and dad.

The way she would sing as she cooked. My feet automatically steer me to a seat but my mind is elsewhere. My mouth speaks without me wanting it. "Hey, Rose, Jazz, Em, Eddy. Hello Esme." I say nodding at each person.

I don't hear there response because I'm pushed back in my mind. Mom's smiling face, Dad and her joking around the table as I ate. Dad drawing a smilly face out of cool whip on my pankackes.

But mostly, how all that stopped after mom died. How I would wake up to the smell of burnt toast and sizzling of fried eggs. I woudn't hear the radio, or anyone singing, I wouldn't smell the good sweet scent of food.

The way that after a few months, dad stopped trying all together. He wouldn't cook, wake up early, joke around, play the piano, nothing. The way I had to learn to cook just to feed myself.

I'm snapped out of my train of thought when a hand is on my shoulder and I jump up. "I-I um. I- Im ok." I mumble. As I look at Alice. She looks in my eyes for a long moment and nods. "So, you ready to go?" She asks.

I nod and give her a soft smile. "Yeah, go grab the helmet I gave you and I'll wait here." I say. She nods and smiles as she walks out of the kitchen and Emmett speaks up. "Dude, when are you going to let me drive that bike?" He asks me.

I smirk and take a sip of a cup of orange juice Esme put in front of me. "Um, never. Your prone to wrecking things Emmett and that out there is my baby." I say and Rosalie laughs. "What about Alice?" She teases.

I smile. "Shhhhh! Alice can never know." I joke. Just then Alice appears with her/my leather jacket and the helmet I have her. "Never know what?" She asks raising an eyebrow and I smile.

"You look, gorgeous." I say to her hugging her and kissing her cheek. "Aww, she is so wipped." Edward coes and Jasper and Emmett snicker. Rosalie just chuckles. "Thank you, baby. But don't change the subject. What can't Alice never know?" She asks.

I grin. "That the motorcycle is my baby." I say with a shrug. Alice looks at me for a moment and smiles. "Yeah, can I be the other mom?" She asks and I laugh not expecting her to say that.

"Sure, babe. You can be the other mom." I say but I don't miss how Esme storms out of the room just then. "Err… did I say something?" I ask the siblings. They all shrug and I just nod as I lead Alice out.

"Let's go, I need to talk to Mr. Banner about that project." I say and she nods as I walk out of the house.

_**A/N: Awww, the love birds are love sick. Wonder why Esme stormed off like that at the mension of being a mom? They are adorable! Read and Review!**_


	39. Chapter 39

**A/N: Here it is, the next chapter! Yup... R&R**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**

**Ch.39**

**Apov**

As soon as we make it to school Bella lights up and leans against her motorcycle and I stand in front of her. Her sunglasses are on the top of her head about to slip down to her eyes and I just sigh as I grab her cinnamon cigarette from her mouth and take a drag as I wink at her and pass it back as I blow smoke out.

"So, what does your family have to say about you smoking, or don't they know?" She asks me. I smile at her as I lean against Edwards Volvo. "Mom, dosen't like it. Dad said it was my body and that I should respect it more. Edward and Jasper can't say anything because they smoke as well. Emmett and Rose don't really care because they smoke weed." I say with a shrug.

Bella nods twice and her sunglasses fall over her eyes and she gives me a doopy smile as she takes out a cig and hands it to me. I put it in my mouth and lean forward so that she can light it for me.

She leans against her bike and raises the sunglasses before looking around and lowering them back. I frown. "What's wrong?" I ask as I blow out smoke from my mouth. She gives me a smirk. "Nothing, just making sure of something." She mumbles. I raise an eyebrow and she smiles. "Down Tiger, I was just checking around the lot to see if anyone was staring at us. Sadly they are." She says.

I laugh. "Since when does Bella Swan, bad girl care that people are looking at her?" I ask. Bella smiles at me and leans forward a bit and takes a drag before blowing it out and her sunglasses slide to the edge of her nose and I can see her eyes. "I don't. What I do mind is when people stare at you." She corrects and lifts her head up so that the sunglasses are back on.

"I thought we agreed on you never wearing those things when your alone with me?" I ask. She grimaces a bit. "We're not alone, Ali." She says before she looks over my shoulder and stops. I frown and look behind me to see the principal walking over to us.

I take one more drag before stomping out the cig with my shoe and Bella just smirks and takes another drag and stands up. "Mr. Green. How are you on this lovely day?" She asks condescendingly.

He frowns. "Miss Swan, Miss Cullen." He says with a nod before turning back to Bella. "Miss Swan I am here to ask you why you felt the need to once again disobey me and smoke in the parking lot?" He asks. I frown, since when are we not allowed to smoke?

Bella grins. "But, sir. There has never been a obstruction to our mutual agreement. I don't see why that would change now." She says and I frown, what is she talking about? Mr. Green sighs and massages his temple. "Miss Swan, that agreement has only been one sided and it was not my side to chose it." He says.

Bella smirks. "Yet, you still took the donation. That is agreeing to my terms, sir. We had an agreement and I don't see why that would be apposed now. Look around, I am not the only person smoking in this whole lot. Yet, you bother me alone. That is discrimination of your student. Then again…. agreeing to take a fine donation from a student can't be too good eather." Bella says to him.

Her voice is velvet and she even lifts her sunglasses and I bet she's giving him those burning eyes of hers. "I… well you see miss. The school is not sure about those donations." He mumbles and Bella smirks. "Sir, I suggest you go back to your office and give the daily news. I bet it will mention something about a fine donation from an 'unknown' person will show up at your office in a few days time." She says smiling her crooked smile.

No, fucking way. Bella is not bribing the principal… is she? 'Donations' pffft, donations my ass. I smell a bribe. I smirk to myself as I lower my head to hide it. Only my Bella would be able to buy her way through school and have fun making rules as she goes.

"Oh, and sir. I would appreciate it greatly if you would re-consider my athletic suspension. I heard that the team will get new uniforms and equipment." She says sweetly. Mr. Green nods a few times before mumbling a goodbye and leaving.

Bella chuckles to herself as she takes another drag and flicks her cig to a puddle. "Well, that was easy." She says blowing out the smoke. I chuckle and nod. "I can't believe you bribe him." I say and she winks. "Not bribes, donations." She says and I roll my eyes.

Bella nods with a smile and I nod back condescendingly as she steps closer and closer until I am pinned against the Volvo and Bella's warm body. "You know, I missed you this morning when I woke up alone." I whisper to her. "How much?" She asks in the same tone.

I look in her deep black-brown eyes and nudge her nose with mine teasingly. "Why don't I just show you?" I ask and don't give her time to answer as I lean forward and connect her lips with mine.

Automaticaly one of her hands goes around my waist and the other against the car keeping my trapped. One of my hands goes to her jaw keeping her face with mine as the other goes around to her back under her opened jacket.

Our lips dance together in a never ending song and my hand pulls her closer to me, god she's so warm. I tilt my head to the other side giving her better acces to my lips and soon our tongues are the ones fighting for dominance.

A nasaly laugh breaks us apart as Bella looks to the side and I swear I hear her growl lowly. I shake my head to clear it and look to the side to see Tanya and Jessica making out. I frown, aren't all girl on girl copules supposed to look hot? So why did this one look… not.

Bella shudders and looks back at me, she leans forward and captures my lips again and we ignore the girls laughs and squeaks and whatever until I hear Bella curse and pull away.

When I see she's grabbing the back of her head in her hand and looking around the whole lot until her eyes fall on, the one and only Kate. Bella takes a step forward and I grab her arm and pull her back to me.

"What happened?" I ask and Bella takes her hand off the back of her head and looks at it. "The little bitch threw a rock at me." She growls. I suppress my snicker because Bella looks pissed but I couldn't hold it.

She pulls away form me. "What the fuck are you laughing at? Its not funny!" She says and I suppress my giggles but Bella mad is just funny to me. I see Bella clench her jaw and ball her hands into fists before a tremor rocks through her back and she takes a deep breath.

"We should get going to class, the bell will sound soon." She says before she opens the seat of her bike and grabs out two book bags. I stop and take a calming breath. "Bella, you know I'm not laughing at you, its at the situation." I say and she just nods back at me and with a hand movement she leads me into the school and to her locker and then mine.

After that she sits with me in class and we talk lowly until class starts. Bella had her schedule changed so now we have every class together which is fun as hell. Bella leans back in her chair next to me and puts her feet up on the desk and slides her shades down.

She doesn't take out a notebook, or a pen or anything. The teacher calls on her a few times and every time she answers correctly. After the class bell sounds she stands and grabs my book bag for me and we make our way to the hall.

"How can you do that?" I ask. She shrugs. "I've always been good at memorizing things." She says softly and I nod once. We walk to our next class and Bella stops at the doorway. She turns back to look at me and then shakes her head as she makes her way into the class room.

I frown and when I step in I notice why she stopped. Kate is in this class with me, did I forget to mention that to Bella? I honestly can remember. I go to sit down next to Kate in my usual seat when Bella grabs my arm and pulls me a back row.

Kate chuckles to herself and I frown when Bella takes my seat and I take the seat next to her. Why is she putting herself in between me and Kate? I mean, she can't be that worried that Kate would try to harm me would she?

I mean, I knew Bella was over protective but this is a little much, don't you think? Wait… who the hell am I talking to?... Am I talking to my self?... Yup, probably am. Wait?... I answered myself didn't I?... O…k. I am seriously fucked up.

Bella sits back like she did in our first period only that this time she has a notebook in her hands. The teacher enters and stops when he sees Bella. "Miss, Swan. I didn't know you transferred back into my class." The teacher states.

Bella offers him a smile. "What can I say, I'm a sucker for your math class. The other teacher aren't enough of a challenge for me." She says. I frown… Wasn't she taking A.P. Math?

This is stirckly basic math… is she actually undermining her own knowledge. The teacher Mr. Mason smiles before he starts to write down formulas. I look at Bella during class to see that she doesn't write down a single thing. So… why did she bother with a notebook?

I shrug it off as I try to do this exercise which is confusing the hell out of me. Bella chuckles and takes the paper from me and slips in hers front of me. I look over it to see the answers all scribbled up in what looks like my hand writing only… its Bella's.

When I look back at her she's scribbling down numbers on the answer sheet. Hmm, she's good. I smile to myself and feel a bit bad mooching off Bella's work. I sigh and Bella looks up at me and raises her sunglasses. "Yes?" She asks. I shake my head. "I can't accept it, its your work Bells." I say.

She smiles and shakes her head. "Those answers are acutaly yours." She says as she opens the notebook and I see its mine. How had I not noticed it was mine she was holding all along?

I look down at the notebook in my hands when I realize it's a plain black notebook. I roll my eyes at her. "Thanks" I mumble and she nods. The rest of the class is passed with me scribbling down formulas and Bella drawing scribbles in her notebook… well mine.

Before I know it the morning classes are done with and Bella and I are sitting at her lunch table with my family and our friends Jacob, Leah and Seth. "So, like. This monster dude just comes out of nowhere and starts taking the people so I need to grab the gun in that guys zombie infested house so that I can kill him and all of his minions before he grabs the citizens." Seth says to Emmett as they speak about video games. Leah is talking with Rosalie about a shopping trip that I am so going on and Edward and Jazz are giving each other love dovey eyes.

Aperently they had come out while we where in Paris so that means it was two days ago. People where giving them looks but mostly everyone just didn't care enough. Bella on the other hand was quiet which is weird for her. I mean, she's mostly quiet at lunch but she looks like she's lost in thought, like she was this morning at my house.

I place a hand on her shoulder and she jumps a bit and looks in my eyes before placing a soft smile on her face. She goes to turn her head to the side to hide her eyes from me and I grab her cheek and lead her to look in my eyes.

I stare in her eyes for a long moment until I see a flash of pain, sadness, sorrow and false happiness. I frown and run my thumb along her jawline and her eyes close as she snuggles in to my hand. "What's the matter Bells?" I ask quietly.

She holds her breath before shaking her head. "I'm good, just… lost in thought is all." She mumbles. "What's going through that head of yours?" I ask. She looks around the table before sending me a soft smile. "I…. I want you to meet someone… I'll tell you who later today." She says and I nod.

Just then someone bumps into Bella's seat sending a tray filled with food on her. Bella slams her hands against the table and turns sharply to see two freshmen girls and Kate sitting down in a corner laughing by herself.

Bella walks two steps before I grab her arm against and she stops and looks at me. "Let me go Alice." She says quietly. She shakes her head and pulls her hand out of mine. "I just want a word with her." She says and I shake my head and grab her hand. "Ignore her Bella, please do it for me?" I ask.

She stops again her eyes still zeroed in on Kate before she shakes off her hair and takes off her jacket. She turns to the two freshmen girls "Get out of my face before I hit you." She says and the two girls launch out of the cafeteria

Bella huffs as she walks out of the cafeteria and to the bathroom where she cleans up as best she can. I walk behind her and help her get cleaned up, after a few minutes Leah shows up with a new shirt for Bella and Rosalie helps me rinse off food out of Bella's hair.

After a few more minutes Leah and Rosalie leave back to the lunch room and I lean on the sink as Bella inspects her hair for any food that might have been left behind. "So.. who did you want me to meet?" I ask. She smiles. "I'll take you after school, I'll show you." She says and I nod once while wondering where the hell she is taking me.

Well, that's Bella for you. Filled with unexpected mysteries.

**A/N: this was a quick chapter, I just wanted something mundane… ish. Where do you think Bella is taking Alice and who will she meet? Its pretty obvious if you we're paying attention.**

**Am I the only person who cant wait until winter break? God, school sucks but hey, its necessary.**


	40. Chapter 40

**A/N: Well you guys sure liked the other chapter. I cant believe its chapter 40 already and I still don't have the ending figured out. xD I have no idea until what chapter this story will last.**

**Hopefully for a very long time.**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**

**Ch.40**

**Bpov**

After we leave the hell hole that is school I drive to the cementery with Alice. "What are we doing?" She asks. I give her a smile and walk with her through the lines and lines of tomb stones until I find the twin pair.

"Alice… these are my parents. Renee and Charlie Swan." I say quietly. She's quiet for a moment before stepping forward and kissing my cheek. "This means a lot to me Bella." She says quietly as she turns to the graves.

"Um, Hi. I'm Alice… Bella's fiancé. I just… I just wanted to thank you both so much for giving this girl life and loving her as much as you two did. Thank you for protecting her and keeping her safe for all this time." She says quietly.

I walk up behind her and hug her from behind. "I hope you both can see my true intentions toward Bella, I plan to love her forever and keep her safe and protected like you two managed. It's easy to see the love you had for your only daughter and that's so respectable. I just hope that wherever you are, that I have your acceptance and your blessing." Alice says and I hug her and kiss her cheek.

I kneel down right in the middle of the tombs and sigh. "Hey, mom and dad. I know last time I came here, I… I wasn't in the best state of mind there was and I appologize for that. I just wanted to say that I still love you both and that… thank you. Thank you for putting this girl… this.. this angel in my path. I know that wherever your both are you are together and that your watching over me." I say quietly.

"Thank you all for the love you gave me, our family sadly had a lot of tragities but hey, lets hope they stopped, no?" I ask with a hint of a chuckle as I feel Alice's hand on my shoulder squeezing me comfortingly.

"Our family didn't have the best timing or luck but… hopefully… hopefully my family with Alice will prosper and be happy. I love her, mom and dad. I'm crazy about her and I told you guys this a few times. I never thought I was going to be this happy ever again but… maybe… I will get a chance at happiness." I say with a smile as I brush the leaves away from the grave markers.

"I love you mom and dad. And hey… I got the girl." I say smiling and I hear Alice laugh softly and when I turn back I see Alice smiling at me. I get up off my knee and hug Alice. "I hope I have your blessing, mom and dad. And I just wish you two could be here with me. I just know that… this time. I won't let happiness walk away from me." I promise them.

Then I turn to mom's and just smile. "Hey, mom. I miss you, I love you and I wish… God, I wish you where here." I mumble as I feel the tears sting my eyes. "I wish I could hear your voice as you sang in the mornings… smell your perfume on me after a hug. Wish I could here your advice and still see your smile." I mumble.

Alice squeezes my hand and I let a few tears fall. "How ironic huh Ma? We find the love of our lives in the same town at around the same time?... That's just a Swan-Volturi thing. Isn't it?" I ask chuckling and I feel a breeze push past me. I take it as her agreement.

I sigh and wipe the tear away before I move to the side and salute the berial place of my father. "Dad, how have you been? I love you and I miss you too. I wish every now and then I could have your advice.." I trail off swallowing the lump on my throat. "I wish I could feel your strong arms around me as you gave me a hug." I say.

Alice squeezes my hand again and I squeeze it back and I sigh. "Look dad, just know that…. Whatever it is that you wrote in that letter… just know that I love you anyway. I will always love you, that doesn't change a thing. Nothing will. You are still my sergeant, my captain, my father, my protector and especially you will always be my hero." I say and I kneel down and brush the leaves off of his tomb stone.

I lift myself from the ground and hug Alice and she smiles. "It's an honor to meet you sir. I hope I reach your standards when it comes to your daughter." She says and I laugh softly. "Don't worry, Ali. You're A-ok to his standards." I say chuckling.

After that we stay a while more talking with my parents and then we leave to my house. We eat and joke and then Alice takes a shower and I give her some clothes. After she gets out I smile at her and tease her before I walk up stairs and take a shower. After I'm clean I grab a pair of warm clothes and walk down.

I walk to the living room and chuckle when I see Alice flipping through my old photo albums. She's sitting on the couch and the fire place is on. I smile to myself as I sit down next to Alice and pull her so that she is leaning against me and I can see over her shoulder.

"What are you looking at?" I ask quietly. She turns to smile at me. "I found a photo album on the coffee table. I hope you don't mind.." She trails off and I shake my head against her shoulder and I look at the page she was looking at again.

"You where so cute as a baby, Bella." She says. I smile. "Thanks…. Though I must admit I saw some pictures of you growing up and you looked adorable with long copper hair." I mumble

She lifts up a bit and looks at me. "How did you… Esme." She says and I chuckle and nod. "Yeah, it was a few months ago." I mumble and Alice shakes her head. "I will never understand the obsession of a mother with baby pictures, especially showing them to the people the kids are dating." She mumbles.

I smile wistfully. "I bet that's an embarassing moment in your life." I say and Alice frowns. "What do you… oh, I'm so sorry Bella. I didn't mean to.." She trails off as I shake my head.

"It's fine, Alice. So, my mom died when I was little. It's not sutch a big deal anymore." I say. Alice shakes her head and looks at me. "It is a big deal, Bella. Your mom is supposed to be a important and supportive person in your life constantly. I… I can't imagine my life without Esme. And I can barely imagine you growing up without your mom." She says.

I frown and shake my head before placing a smile on my face. "You get used to it Alice. Sure it was hard at the beginning… its just…" I shake my head from my thoughts. "Alice, I'm not upset that my mom is dead. I learned to accept it, what bothers me. And it still does until this day is how she died." I say looking at the fire. I feel Alice's hand on my neck as she tilts my head to hers. "You never told me how your mom died… not really. You just told me she was killed when you where ten." She says.

I take a deep breath and hug Alice to me a bit closer. "Well… I was ten and if I'm not mistaken we were taking a drive around town. We where heading home back from the park we where at. Mom stopped for a moment to look over the back seat at me to ask about something when all of a sudden the door is yanked opened… I hear my mom yell and I quickly take off my seat belt and make my way out of the car but when I try to run some other guy grabs me and pulls me into the car."

"I… I felt disoriented at being pulled back in to the car and even more so when he pulls me out of the other end right next to my mom. She said something about not having money and the guy just smiles and says that she can pay him with the car. She quickly nods but when she goes to turn and sees me next to her she moves forward and pushes the guy grabbing me and I guess… I guess the guy just freaked because next thing I know mom is on the floor with blood pumping out of her stomach and mouth." I say and suppress a shudder.

"I did the only think I knew how, I grabbed her phone from her pocket after the men left in the car and called 911. I told them mom was hurt and the direction to where I was. Soon enough the cops showed up. They… they were to late." I say quietly.

"Mom had died a few minutes after she was shot… I still remember her voice so soft… she said that I shouldn't cry and that she loved me. Oh and to tell dad that she will see him when he gets there… god… in that moment I didn't even know what to do… I knew the basics, keep her awake and put preasure but… I didn't know what else to do." I mumble sadly.

Alice hugs me to her and kisses my head a few times. "Bella you tried. You tried your best to save her it just… it just wasn't in the cards for her to live. It was for a reason I believe that. Its time you should to." She says and I shake my head and sigh.

"Alice its… its just not a discussion I want to have yet again. I get it that you believe in God and it's a good trait Alice. It's a wonderful thing that you believe in him and that he will work some magic on your life. But… Alice… I'm too fucked up. I'm too damaged, too tortured to accept that something like that will happen to me." I say standing up from next to her and standing looking at the fire.

"Alice, I won't… I can't believe in a god. How can I? I just… don't care about my soul. If I have one that is." I sigh. "I don't expect you to understand Alice. Your life… its been so much different then mine. Your's has been a happy, good life. No sadness to deep that could rot you to the core Alice. But me?" I ask shaking my head as I look back at her.

"Alice, I've just began to see good in the world. You showed me what good is, what love is. And I can't seem to be happier about it. But… I will never be the best person there is for you Alice. I will never be that person that your whole family will automatically love and expect you to never get hurt… I can promise you that I'll care for you for the rest of my life… but I don't expect you to never change your mind." I say softly.

Just then Alice stands up and looks me in the eyes. "Yes you can, Bella. Hell, where engaged! My parents love you, my siblings love you, I love you. I can understand how hurt you've been Bella all i'm trying to do is erase a bit of it from you but you… you always close off from me when I try." She says and I frown.

"You get so.. bitter ever time I try to sooth some of that angst that you keep within. Its like your savoring the blame of something you didn't do." She states but it cuts me to the bone. I close my eyes as a wave of hurt washes through me and I clench my fists as a tremor of anger at the truth in her words.

"I know I didn't do anything. That is what kills me Alice, can't you see it? Haven't you been able to see all this time that we have been together that I have been mostly dead until you came along?" I ask a bit loudly.

"And don't even try selling on me that your parents love me. Maybe you can't see it but I sure as hell can. They don't love me Alice, its all an act for you! Can't you see the way Carlisle eyes me every single time I do or say something he think is un-fitting? The current way Esme can't even stand to be in the same room as me for more than a few minutes?" I ask her.

"Your siblings like me enough to stay out of our business and they respect you enough to be cool with me but can't you still see the way Rosalie eyes me whenever I walk a little to close to you? The way once every month we head out and 'talk' damit Alice please don't tell me your that blind and don't know that Rosalie still secretly resents me for dating her little sister?" I ask her.

She's quiet. "I… I had just brushed it off as you two getting… along better." She mumbles and I smile and run a hand through my hair. "We do, trust me we do get along better Alice. But that doesn't change the fact that she still thinks I'm not worth being in the same room as you." I say quietly.

"Then she's wrong." Alice states. "She's dead wrong about that then." She says louder. I shake my head. "Is she really Alice?" I ask lowly as I take a step closer to her. "Are you one hundred percent sure I'm worth being in the same room as you?... Being allowed to hold you… you, an angel? A fucking demond for all intense and purposes is in love with an angel. Tell me how she can be wrong about it?" I ask her.

Alice surprises me by stepping close to me and pushing me, I stumble back two steps. "Say it Bella. If you want to break up with me then say it right fucking now! Don't beat around the bush and try to pin it on me to say it. If you want to call of our engagement because you don't want to give up your freedom then tell me so now, don't try to play those fucking mind games with me!" She yells.

"Alice, I don't know-" I'm cut off when Alice slaps me and I hold my stinging cheek as I look at her and she's glaring at me. "Don't fucking lie to me Bella! We all know that in this room only one person doesn't deserve to be here and that person is ME. If your that tired of me then tell me so now, so that I can walk out with at least some of my dignity. Stop putting up this fucking wall I know isn't you!" She yells.

I look at her in a trance as she seems to grow angrier and angrier. "You are not a bitter person! Your not mean and your certenly not a devil so stop talking so much bull and say what you really want. If you want to break up with me say it now." She says and I can see her physicaly shaking in anger.

"N-no." I say quietly. Alice stares in my eyes and opens her mouth to speak but I cut her off. "No, Alice. I don't want to fucking break up or pull of the engagement. I gave you that ring for a reason. I want to spend every fucking minute of the rest of my life with you. I'm not lying about that." I say to her as I step closer.

"I'm not playing a mind game with you, I love you. I love you and I will always love you until the moment I take my last breath and then I will love you in the after life. Hell, I want you to pass before me so that you will never have to feel the gap of my presence. I want to love you until your old and grey and wrinkly." I say and I can feel the tears in my eyes as I speak.

My voice is thick and crakcs at some parts. "I want to have a whole life with you. I want the big house and the feeling of love as we speak our vow's. I want to hold you to me every single night so that I never know what it means to not have you with me. I don't want to love anyone as much as I want to love you for the rest of my life. And that is why I proposed to you." I say as I pull her into a hug.

"I love you. I fucking love you more then anyone on this earth has loved anyone in their whole lives. If you live to be a hundred. I want to be a hundred and 1 minute. So that I never get to know what it feels like to lose you, because losing you would be unbearable to my existence. To my life. I'm haunted but you… you make me feel like I never have to cry a single tear ever again and you don't know how much that scares me." I sob at some parts.

"I'm used to sadness, pain but love?... I never knew what love is until I met you that first day and my world shattered a bit every time I got to know you better. The way my heart hammered in my chest even when I was pulling that façade of a uncaring teen. I never had anything to lose, I had lost everything Alice. In my mind I never had to worry about losing anything ever again but now?" I ask skaing my head as I hide my head in her neck.

My voice is still thick and I try to swallow down the lump. "Now I live in a constant fear that something… something or someone will tear us apart and don't you know how much that kills me? I'm sorry for getting you angry but I'm just trying to grasp at what I feel is normal for me. My heart…. My fucking broken heart that you put back together can't take it Alice… it cant take it if I lose you." I sob at the end as I kneel down in front of her and hug her standing form around the waist. I burry my head in her stomach and I feel her hand on my hair. My tears don't stop falling and not a minute passes by when Alice knees down too and hugs me.

"I'm not going anywhere, I love you and I'm here. I will always be here. I love you forever. I understand Bella, please. Please stop crying. I can't take it. I love you, I love you and you will never lose me. I can't take it if we're apart either. Ok? Shhh… calm down Bella. I love you, I love you so freaking much." She says and her voice sounds like its on the verge of crying too.

I hug her and I let her hold me. She holds me all during this time I cry. She speaks quietly to me and before I know it I'm resting my head on her lap as she runs a hand through my hair and my body and mind feel so broken.

They feel worn down and I just feel numb. The fire is the only light in the whole room now so I don't know what time it is. The wood cracks and all I can hear besides that is the soft hum of Alice's voice as she sings to me.

I still feel tears in my eyes, I feel them in me. So, I let them fall quietly as my mind seems to not focus on anything. I know I had a break down… I know the feeling is something I have felt before. But… it's the first time I feel so safe after one.

And I quickly know the diference, it's the girl that is with me. Suddenly this remind me of when I had proclaimed my love to Alice. When I had given her my heart. I close my eyes lazily and they open again in the same slow motion.

I lick my dry lips and clear my thought. "Y-you know… this reminds me of the day I told you I loved you." I say to her. Alice humm's and giggles. "It does…" She says running a hand through my hair, her nails scraping my scalp.

I sigh and roll over so that I'm lying flat on my back and I look up in her eyes and with a soft smile I recall something. "You have my heart Mary Alice Brandon Cullen and I don't think I want it back. So, instead of asking you to say it back… I'm begging you to keep it safe. It's too fragile to resist another break Alice. So… can you keep it safe for me?" I ask quietly looking up into her eyes like I had done all those months ago.

Hmm… months. It feels like a life time has passed. Alice smiles and I see a tear spill and I quickly wipe it away. "Back then, I couldn't tell you I loved you Alice. I didn't believe I was able to feel love. But now… now I'm sure. So now I correct my words from that day." I say looking in her eyes.

"I love you mary Alice Brandon Cullen and I don't think I want my heart back. So, if you say it back, I beg you and promise you that I will keep your heart safe if you keep mine." I say and she smiles. "I love you Bella Swan and I will never give your heart back to you and I will always keep yours safe. I love you back and I always will. Your are the sole owner of my heart." She says.

I break into a smile and like that day, I cup her neck and lean forward at the same time I pull her down to me and we share a tender kiss. We cheerish our love. After a moment has passed I feel animated again and I feel strong.

We pull apart and I stand and lead her to the door and grab a flashlight and turn off everything in my house before I lead her to my car. She gets in quietly and we drive off. And I take her to her house and I tell her that tomorrow I will pick her up.

**A/N: Next chapter will be a regular chapter, hope I can write and publish it today. I actually cried in this chapter so... Yeah. Reviews are always encouraged!.**


	41. Chapter 41

_**A/N: Hey guy's hope you all liked the last chapter. This one is another filler so I hope you like it. Its verry funny in my opinion. Sex scene will be marked just skip to the next bold lined out area and its safe to read. Have fun!**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch.41**_

_**~a few days after the last chapter Friday.~**_

_**Bpov**_

After school I dropped Alice off at her house and headed home. After a few hours I got bored and decided it was time to hang out with my friends for a while so I headed over to Jake's house. I park out front of his house and knock on the door twice. Billy answers it with a smile. "Hello, Bella. How are you?" He asks bringing me over in a hug/

I chuckle. "I'm good. You?" I ask. He smiles. "Never been better." He says with glee. I chuckle and scratch my neck. "Is Jake here by any chance?" I ask. Billy nods. "Yes, he's in his room. Just go right on up, I was just heading out anyway. Have to work the night shift." He says as he grabs his badge and gun belt.

I smile, "Say hi to Chief Danton for me." I say and he nods as he walks out. I chuckle as I make my way through the familiar house until I reach Jake's door. I knock on it twice. "Fag open up!" I yell.

I hear shuffling and the door opens to reveal Jake. He smiles. "Hey, Bells." He says as he motions for me to enter. I step in to his room and the aroma of weed wafts my senses and makes my nerves beg.

I sigh and clear my throat. "So, Jake. How have you been?" I ask. He smiles. "Its all good, bored out of my mind since my best friend got whipped." He says and I chuckle as I sit down on his messy bed. "Ow." I mumble when I feel something jab into my leg.

I lift up and reach under the bed and grab the wooden pipe from under the sheets and sniff the end. "Ah, you where having some fun before I entered." I say with a smile as he grins.

"Maybe." He says smiling. I chuckle. "What else have you been up to Jake?" I ask. He shrugs and sits on the edge of his bed. "Nothing really, Leah and I go out every once and a while and Seth is hanging out a lot with me now so I pretty much hang out with them." He says.

I nod and grab Jakes pocket knife from the night stand and start to flip it open and close. "What do you think of the Cullens?" I ask resting my head against the wall. "Their… nice." He says and I raise an eyebrow and we both crack a smile.

"No, really. Their cool, I just don't like how the look at you sometimes. And with that I mostly mean Blondie one and two." He says and I chuckle as I flip the knife around in my hands catching it by the blade.

"Rosalie has her reasons to doubt me… but Jazz…. I don't know if he has the thought for himself or if he follows Rose. Oh, and the parents don't like me so much either." I mention as I flip the knife around again and catch it by the blade again.

"I still don't know why you bothered settling down. I mean really? Why hold so much bullshit from people, its not like you ever cared before." He mentions and I sigh as I twist the knife in my fingers and hold it by the base.

"I care for her Jake… so much. Its like I never lived until now, until I had Alice I didn't care if I lived another minute or not. But now… I want to live, ya know? I want to see what the world has in store for us.." I say and sneak a glance at Jake.

He's nodding seriously. "I can see that Bells. I really can, we all can. Your happier, like nothing we have ever seen. And you don't know how happy, Leah, Seth and I are for you. But also understand that if you get downsized by the Cullen siblings then the Cullen siblings are gettind downsized by the Wolfs." He says and I laugh.

"Hahaha, man I haven't herd that name in a long time." I say chuckling. Jacob gives me a smile. "Aw, come on Alpha. You forgot about your wolf pack?" He asks and I snicker. "Never." I say running a hand through my hair.

"Hmm… the wolf pack… I think its time the wolf pack go for a run, don't you?" I ask. I swear Jacob's eyes grew wide and shined. "Hell yeah!" He says and I grin. "Go, call Leah and Seth and let me drive home and ditch the car to get my bike and we can meet up at school. I think it needs some re-decorating." I say with a grin.

"I bring the people you bring the paint?" He asks. I grin "Hell yeah." I say and with a grin I walk out of his house and hop into my car. I speed down the road to my house and once I reach it I slip into my house and grab my black hood, jeans and boots before I grab a book bag and fill it with cans of paint before I grab my helmet and hop on my bike.

I cherish the sound of the engine purring before gunning it out of there. I can't help my care free laugh as I speed down the road and as I lean forward to get less drag and I feel like I'm flying threw the streets. I howl once I reach school and crack up when I hear the answering howls and laughs.

I park the bike in the edge of the woods where the rest of the group is before I snicker and play punch Jacob, Seth and Leah. "How's the wolf pack?" I ask. Leah pouts. "I'm mad at you." She says and I frown before I smile and grab her in a hug.

"You just think I won't throw an after party. I will and there will be tons of alcohol." I say as I turn her around "So, party at your house again?" She asks. I smile but shake my head.

"Nah, I feel like a big blow out. I want to throw a beach party." I say grinning. We all share a look and I sling the backpack on my back and I look at Seth and he has the paper tubes where we have the outlines.

"Lets just enter through Banner's Classroom window and then we can host the wolf pack bonfire at the beach." I say and they all nod as we walk over to Banner's window and we open it, I shake my head. "He always leaves his windows open." I mumble and I hear chuckles and words of agreement before we make our way into the school and head over to the gymnasium.

I hmm as I look around until I shrug. "Lets just paint the wolf head in the middle of the basket ball court. "Seth help me with the outline." I say and Seth throws a plastic tube my way. "It has part of the outline." He explains as he grabs the other two and we start taking the papers out and flatening them out and sticking them to the floor with tape. After that is done I grab two black cans and start to trace the lines repeatedly with the cans.

After the outlines dry Jake and Leah come back snickering. I wipe my forehead and raise an eyebrow. "What you guys do?" I ask. They grin. "Nothing we just drew the paw prints in the cafeteria, office doors and on the floor leading to here." He says and I role my eyes at them.

"Seth, give them the grey cans so that we can fill in the color." I say sand Seth starts to pass them around and then all four of us start to fill in the color and I do the eyes a deep mesmerizing blue with a gold light and start helping out with the color fill.

We finish in around an hour and then we climb the bleachers and look down at the huge wolf head in the middle of the basket ball court. "Well, that was fun… now, lets go start that party." I say with a grin as we make our down and after cleaning everything up. We make our way out of the school.

"Ok, Leah get Sam and the guys to get the bond fire started. I'll call everyone and tell them to bring soda's and chips and that I will supply the liquor." I say and with a mutual chuckles we all part with a howl as we separate at the exit of the school. I drive to my house quickly and text all my contacts which is everyone in school practically that.

**Wolf pack party,**

**9pm - ?**

**Be there, bring soda**

**& chips. Wolf pack**

**entertainment and**

**boo's. ~B**

I send that to everyone and call up Alice. She answers on the second ring. "Hey, baby." I say. "Hey, Bells." She says. I turn on the lights to my room as I head to the closet. "Whats up?" She asks. I smile "There's a wolf pack party in La Push. Want to go?" I ask.

"I'm sorry, what? A wolf party?" She asks and I chuckle as I sort through clothes. Right…. Alice doesn't know about the wolf pack. "Er… Jake, Seth, Leah and me are throwing a party in La Push, want to go?" I ask.

"Sure, what time does it start?" She asks. "Nine but if you want head over earlier and we can hang out for longer." I say and she chuckles. "Fine, I'll tell my siblings that there's a need to be there party." She says and with a 'love you' as parting words I take a quick shower and get dressed. After that I grab the big rusty old truck and drive to the liquor shop.

I open up the coolers and grab around ten bags of ice and place them in the trunk before walking in to the liquor shop and buying everything and anything I feel like getting and stack them in the truck bed. I slowly drive to La Push and when I get there I smile when everything is set up.

"Who would have thought the natives would help a pale face out." I call out as I shut the truck door. Sam, Paul, Sue, Emily, Clare, Quil, Embry, Don, Mat, Harry, Bert, Marco, Dante, Clary, Suze, Maggie and John all just roll there eyes at me.

I look around the see the wood stocked up, the liquor table set up, and normal tables and logs all around for people to sit at and what not. I motion for the guys to grab the beers, and start to set everything up. "Quil you the DJ?" I ask and he grins. "Hell'z Yeah." He says and I chuckle at him as he flips switches and what not on his electrical system.

Well, this is going to be fun. I help out setting up the coolers and kegs until everything and then the count downs tarts. Slowly people start showing up and before long everyone from school is there… exept Alice and her siblings.

I frown and check my phone as I take a sip of my beer. Nothing. What the hell? I shoot Alice a text, 'Babe, where r u? Are you heading over? Love ya, txt me back' I slip the phone in my pocket and just then Jake scoops me up and drags me to the table where Seth and Leah are holding two shot glasses. Leah hands one to Jake and Seth hands one to me.

"To the wolf pack!" Leah says. And we chorus. "To the wolf pack." We cheer and down the shot. "Ahoooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooo." We howl as we chuckle at each other. "'Nother round." I say and Leah serves us four more shots. "To life, way we make it worth living." I say and they cheer "Living!" as we down the drinks again.

I smile a bit when I feel the small burn in my thought. "Well, well, well. Look who gained some life." I hear a voice say from behind me. I frown and turn on my heels and roll my eyes.

"Heidi, you look lovely as always." I say with a smile and she smiles back. "Did you finaly let go of that dead weight Cullen?" She asks. I smirk. "Her name is Alice and she is not a dead weight." I say to her.

She shrugs. "Still, I bet she can't offer you what I do." She says seductively. I feel my mouth go a bit dry, I may love Alice but Heidi is still attractive to me. But I won't look at her, I won't touch her. I love Alice.

"Oh, trust me. She offers me way more." I say with a smirk as I take a drink from my beer. "So, Heidi. Instead of having this discussion why don't we act civil. After all we are friends." I say as I hand her a beer cup.

She offers me a smile. "Oh, I know we are. I just love the protective way you speak about her, its pretty cute." She says and with that she steps closer to me and bends to pump some beer out of the keg.

I take a deep breath, close my eyes and down the rest of me beer and frown. "This beer taste like crap." I mutter as I walk around Heidi and grab one of my family's brew and down it with a smile. "Now this is good beer." I mumble as I bring the can back to my mouth.

"Will you ever lose your edge with the hard stuff?" Heidi teases as she sips her beer and I laugh. "No, not really. I like.. quick results." I say after a pause to think. "You do remember the rhyme. Beer before liquor never sicker?" She asks. I nod "That's for beginners. When your body gets used to mixing it makes it a bit better." I say and she nods twice.

"I… Bella. Did you invite the Denali's?" Heidi asks after a pause. I frown. "No, I didn't. Why?" I ask. Heidi gulps a chug of her beer. "Because… they just pulled up… with the Cullen's." She says.

I turn on my hells to see the Denali girls walk to the beech with the Cullen's but… I don't see Alice… or Kate. I clench my jaw and my hand fists around the beer can and it spills.

"Shit." I mutter as I drop the beer can and wipe my hand with a napkin. "Someone really hates the Denali girls." Heidi murmurs as I shot her a glare and she lifts her hands up in surrender. I look around again to see if I can see Alice or Kate.

I sigh and grab another beer and make my way to the Cullen siblings. "Hey guys." I say and they all smile to me. "Hey, Bella. Nice party." Emmett says grinning. I smile "Thanks, there's drinks, snacks and there is enough seats around the bondfire." I say.

They nods and part away in pairs and I hear my name being called my Quil. "Bella, come over here. I found your song and we demand a dance!" He hollers. I frown but before I know it Hedi, Leah, Jessica, Beth, Daisy and Mandie all drag me over to the make shift dance floor which is just wood planes.

Once I'm settled in front of the DJ booth the girls shoo everyone away leaving me and the six girls on the stage and I turn to Quil. "What the fuck are you talking about darling?" I ask him.

He grins and tosses me a mic and my smile falters. "I'm not singing." I say in the mic and everyone aww's. I sigh. "Ok, I will sing… depending on the song." I say and Quil grins as Jake makes his way to the stage and tosses him a CD and stands with me.

"Ok, just tell me the song." I say and without a word the song starts and I smile to myself as the techno beat starts and the color lights start flashing. I look at Jake and push him a bit and he smiles.

"This is Bella's version of 'Didn't want to do it' by Julia Volkova." Quil says and the beat continues and with a role of my head I start dancing. Er well… dancing like the video…

Ok, its grinding. But, in my defence its Jake I'm grindig with, so… I'm good. Then I pull away from his as I start to sing.

_"You'll been calling me a bitch._

_But I have to tell you_

_'bout your best friend._

_Her body so hot,_

_I had to give her my attention."_

I say motioning to Heidi with a shrug.

_"She took my number,_

_asked me if I want to hang out._

_And all I'm thinking,_

_is how to get her back to my house."_

I say and I laugh a bit when me and Jake make the banging move with our lower halfs. This whole dance is just a joke to make people laugh.

_One thing lead to another_

_We looked at each other_

_Then she started kissing and feeling me up_

_I know I said there isn't another_

_She's a wonderful lover_

_And we began to rock, rock, rock, oh_

I say running a hand from my legs up to my hair where I knot it and shake my head before cracking a smile, then I step to him and again we both bang the air when the 'rock, rock, rock, oh.' Part comes on and everyone laughs.

_I didn't wanna do it, But I did_

_I didn't wanna do it, But I did_

I motion for the girls to chorus and we begin to sing again as Jake just cracks the hell up. Heidi comes close to me as I start to sing and with a worried glance to Jake who just roles his eyes, we start to grind as I sing. And the girls chorus.

_I didn't wanna do it (She was all over me)_

_But I did (I could not resist her)_

_I didn't wanna do it (She's looking so sexy)_

_But I did (And I had to freak her)_

When the freak her part was sung Heidi turned around to face me and pulls me close to her and I roll my eyes as I slide out of her hold. As the funny part starts. I smirk slightly as Heidi walks back to the group… for now.

_She came to my crib_

_I told her meet me at the hot tub_

_Started getting undressed_

_Gave her patron and told her drink up_

I sing with a wink as choruses of "Oooohh's" start cause, I do have a hot tub. And I add a wink.

_How was I supposed to know_

_That when we drunk it make us do things_

_She turned into a hoe_

_And so I turned into a pimp g_

I sing brushing my shoulder to Jake and he makes 'You hurt me' motion covering his heart with his hand.

_One thing lead to another_

_We looked at each other_

_Then she started kissing and feelin me up_

_I know I said there isn't another_

_But she's a wonderful lover_

_And we began to rock, rock, rock..._

_I didn't wanna do it, But I did_

_I didn't wanna do it, But I did_

_I didn't wanna do it (She was all over me)_

_But I did (I could not resist her)_

_I didn't wanna do it (She's looking so sexy)_

_But I did (And I had to freak her)_

_Sorry but I have to be honest_

_I don't wanna lead you on, you should move on_

_Wish I could say this never happened_

_Then you wouldn't be crying_

_But I'm only human_

_I didn't want to do it, but I did._

_I didn't want to do it, but I did._

_I didn't want to do it (She was all over me)_

_But I did, (I cold not resist her)_

_I didn't want to do it (She's looking so sexy)_

_But I did ( And I had to freak her)_

After I finish the song I take a bow and Jake throws me a beer and I down half of it was I walk off the make shift dance floor and walk around to see if I can find Alice anywhere. I see Edward and Jasper near the keg and walk over to them.

"Hey, Edward, Jazz. Have you guys seen Alice? I can't find her." I state and they look at me and smile. "Hey, Bells. Nice song and I think I saw her walking around with Angela. I think she's around the shore looking for you." He says and with a smile to him I leave.

I find Alice quickly and I scoop her into a hug. "I've missed you." I say and she laughs. "I missed you too." She says and I turn her around and kiss her. We kiss soundly for a long moment until Alice drags me over to the dance floor where we start to dance.

Again the song is a grinding song so Alice turns around so that her ass is against me and she starts to grind. I pull her impossibly closer to me and grind against her as I move one hand to her stomach and I grab her hand with the other.

I feel a familiar heat spread over my abdomen and I smile to myself as I grind against Alice's tight, fucking perfect ass. I tilt my head to that my breath fans across her neck and I feel her shudder when my lips brush against her ear. "Alice… I need you." I say and I feel her push up against me again.

"I crave you, Alice." I say lowly and she leans into me completely and I wrap both my arms around her waist and start to kiss her neck. Her delectable, flawless neck. Its true, I need her. We haven't had sex since Paris which has been what? Six to seven days? Shit, I need to feel Alice.

I kiss along her neck and hmmm against her neck when I nibble and she pushes almost forcefully against me. Where still moving to the beat but ever so slowly I am making my way to the corner of the dance floor until I flip Alice around and attack her lips with mine.

"Bella." Alice whimpers as I pull her closer to me, so close you can't even fit in a peice of paper in between us. I break the kiss and rest my forehead against hers. "Alice, baby I need you so bad it hurts… I want you, its been to long." I growl agasint her lips.

Alice shudders and knots a hand in my hair and without a moment of hesitation I pull her to me and walk to the parking lot. I smile, the shitty truck has a very nice interior. I hope Alice doesn't mind, because I don't think Jake will let me borrow his house.

I pull her in the truck bed with me and turn it on quickly as I start driving to a deserted road. "Bella, where are you taking us?" She asks in between sweet kisses against my neck. Her right hand running up and down against my thigh.

I shudder as I try to push this truck faster. "To a cliff face, we won't be bothered there." I say and Alice hmmm's as she starts to suck on my neck and I moan softly. "What are you going to do to me?" She asks and I suppress another shudder.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~do not read if you don't like sex scenes~~~~~~~**

Fuck, I love a dirty talking, playful Alice. I should throw parties more often. "What do you want me to do?" I ask my voice thick with desire. "I want you to kiss me all over… and touch me… god I want you to make me beg for you. Then I want you to fuck me, Bella. Can you do that?" She asks and I nod "God, yes. I can do that." I say and just then Alice pulls away from me and when I chance a glance at her I want to eat her.

The skirt she was wearing is pushed up and her hand is buried in there. I chance a glance at the road and look back at Alice and see her head tilt back as she does something to herself. "God, baby. Let me see." I beg as I look from Alice to the road.

"Bella…" she moans and I look back to see her skirt completely rided up so I can see her. All of her and I see as her thumb brushes against her clit and she moans. That's it. I stop the at the cliff face and put it in park. I disconnect the key and when Alice opens her eyes I crash my lips into hers.

I pull her body to me until I'm straddling her thigh and one of mine are in between her legs. I quickly unbutton her shirt and unclasp her bra and start to kiss my way down to the vally of her breasts until I take one of her erect peaks in my mouth and suck hard. I hear Alice gasp as she arches for me.

She moans for me when I bite down softly. And pull away as I blow at it and move to her other breast. I change my tactic on this one. I start to nibble at the flesh of her breast and after I run my tongue around her nipple a few times I take it in my mouth and suck hard on it.

Alice arches and moans as I lift up a bit and shift my weight which causes my leg to brush against her center. "Ah, Bella…." Alice moans and with that I slide my hand down to her center and lift her skirt completely up.

She had taken off her underwear earlier so now she's completely wet and bare. "God, Alice your so wet. Is this all for me?" I ask against her neck and I hear her moan a breathy 'yes' so I start running my finger up and down her slick slit.

Before she can beg me for what I know she wants I plunge a finger deep in her and curl it, before adding a second finger and thrusting in and out of her quickly. She arches and her eyes scrunch up and her mouth opens and she gives me a loud deep moan that makes me drip.

I slow down my pace and her eyes open slowly and we lock eyes. I start to move my fingers in and out of her slowly our deep breathing and her moans our music. "I love you." I say lowly to her as I add a third finger which makes her arch her back for me and I kiss her neck sweetly.

"Bellaa..." she moans and goes to close her eyes and I brush my thumb across her clit. "Don't close your eyes, look at me baby." I say and her lazily eyes open and she looks at me with those melting hazel eyes.

"I… I love you… god I love you, Bella." She pants and I lean forward and capture her lips in a tender kiss. I brush my thumb across her clit and Alice breaks the kiss to moan and I feel her clench around me and I moan.

I lean forward again needing to taste my Alice's lips and I saver the feeling when she moans as my tongue explores her mouth. "Bella, I'm close. Fuck… don't stop, please don't stop." She moans out and with that I shudder.

If three fingers make her beg, four will make her cum. I break the kiss as I look down at my fingers going in and out of Alice and I line up the forth finger and without warning I push it in until my knuckles are at her entrance and Alice arches and yells out a moan.

I watch with dazed eyes as Alice crumbles under my hand but I don't stop pumping until she out rides her orgasm. I pull my fingers out of her and bring them to my lips where I suck them off one by one. "God, you taste so good." I moan as I lick my fingers.

After my fingers are clean I lick my lips of any of Alice's juice I had spilled until she brings her hand to my cheek and after giving her a soft smile she kisses me and moans. "God, I love tasting myself on your tongue." She says against my lips making my core clench.

"Alice..." I groan when she brings her hands to my chest cupping me from above my shirt. "You my dear, are over dressed." She says before bringing her hands to the hem of my shirt and tugs it off. I quickly un-do my pants and lower them to my ankles and almost instantly Alice's hand is there.

She cups me and runs a finger firmly over my slit and I moan, god, I love this girl when she know's what she wants. As if reading my mind she leans forward and against my lips she speaks. "I want you." She says before her hand shifts and one of her fingers enters me.

I groan and duck my head to her shoulder and she slides a second finger in me and starts to move them, in, out, curl, in, out, curl, in, curl, out, in, curl, out. Making me moan out and start to meet her thrusts with my hips.

Alice starts to kiss my shoulder and with her free hand she unclasps my bra –thank god for strapless bra's- and throwing it to the floor of the truck. I gasp a moan when Alice takes my nipple in her mouth.

"Ugh, Alice…. God, so good…. Ugh, don't… fuck, don't stop." I rasp out as Alice adds a third finger. Then Alice suprises the fuck out of me by bitting me. And by me I mean my fucking neck.

"Ow, fuck Alice." I mutter and she just thrusts into me quicker and starts to suck on the same spot she had bitten. "Ugh…. Oh, yeah…. God baby that feels so good." I mumble as Alice sucks on my neck, massages my breast with one hand and thrusts in and out of me.

I whimper when I feel myself clench around Alice. "Your so close… Bella, cum for me alright baby?" Alice asks against my ear as she licks the shell and I shudder and nibble at her neck.

"Ungh." I groan out when Alice adds a forth finger and I clench hard around her fingers. But still, I'm not there yet. I whimper. "Please…" I manage to get out. Shit, it hurts so good. Alice starts pumping in and out of me quickly and I clench again but still I'm not there.

Shit, come on! I start to push against her fingers and finaly, fucking finaly her thumb brushes against my clit sending me over the edge. I yell out her name as I crumple to a heap of nothing on top of Alice.

Alice continues to rub my clit as I ride my orgasm and after I can feel my muscles I lift myself up and touch my lips to Alice's. Once, twice, three times, four, five and six until I crack a smile and nuzzle her neck. "I love you." I sigh happily and Alice runs her hand lazily down my back. "I love you." She says softly.

_**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Its safe to read from here down~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**_

My fiancé, she's perfect. "Your perfect." I say to her and Alice chuckles. "Why thank you, so are you." She says giving me her mind blowing smile and a wink. "Come on, your babysitters must be worried sick." I sigh as I grab my bra and Alice's from the floor and bring hers to my face.

"I am keeping this." I say and Alice laughs. "No, your not." She says and I hide it behind my back. "Yeah, I am. I'm going to cuddle with it every night and maybe even touch myself to the memory of your breasts." I say and I see Alice shake her head and reach forward and grab my bra and hold it.

"Then I'll keep yours." She says and I raise an eyebrow. "No, I think you have enough of my jackets for that. And enough of my shirts two. I on the other hand only have one pantie and now one bra. I'm on the losing side, Alice. Its not fair." I say and she laughs and throws the bra in my face.

"You are sutch a child." She mutters and I lean forward and bite her neck pretty hard she yelps and swats me away. "Why did you bite me?" She asks. I shrug. "You bit me, I bit you. You fucked me, I fuck you. I just guessed we were giving mutual stuff today." I say with a mischievous smile.

Alice looks at me for a moment before erupting into laughter and I frown as I get dressed again. "What are you laughing at?" I ask. She just giggles and starts to get dressed as well.

After were both dressed I tuck Alice's bra in the glove compartment and with an eye roll from her we drive back to the beach. Once we get there Jake comes over to me and so do the Cullen's.

"Hey, Bells." He says and I nod to Jake as he hands me a cold beer from my brew and I sigh as I take a sip. I offer some to Alice who accepts it and takes two gulps. Just then Jake points to my neck. "Dude, you have a nasty mosquito bite on your neck." He says drunkenly.

I nod and cast a look at Alice to see her smiling agasint the can of beer before drinking a few more gulps. "Yeah, mosquitoes. Feisty little suckers." I mutter before pasing around Jake and going next to Alice and smacking her ass as I grab a beer from the fridge and I hear Alice's gasp as I straigten up and wink at her before cracking open my can and touching it to hers.

"To mosquitoes." I mumble before touching my lips to hers and pulling back and taking a swig of my beer. I hear Emmett's booming laughter and when I turn to the side I see him laughing his ass off at us.

"Y-your telling me. A-Alice did that? HAHAHAHAHAHa!" He booms and I shrug as I sling my arm around her shoulders and pull her close and kiss the top of her head. "Wouldn't you wish Rose did that to you." I say and that shuts him up.

"Rosie!" He calls and I start to crack up and pull Alice with me to the bon fire. I sit down on the ground and Alice curls up next to me and I smile when I rembmer the time I had promised myself to try and love her.

The night I had fought with myself so very hard to fight her off… how glad I am that I hadn't listened to my mind.

_**A/N: Well, what you guys think?**_


	42. Chapter 42

**A/N: Hey people! How's it going? I am so sorry for the long wait, its complicated. Anyway! I hope you all had great holidays and a supper happy New Years! Well I wish you all the best. So, let's get going on reading no? Ok, ill shut up now. But…. Nah, figure it out ;)**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!...**

**Ch.42**

**Apov**

I open the lock quietly as I can and drop my bag on the door. I grab my instrument before dashing up the stairs as quietly as possible. Bella always teases me that my footsteps, despite how small I am, are loud and she can hear them from the time I open the door.

Once I reach the second story, I slow down my foot steps and tip toe up the next flight of stairs until I reach the outside of Bella's room. Her door is open and I grin as I tip toe closer to her room.

Once I reach the door I lean against it and just admire my view. Bella is laying on her bed, her clothes from last night on the floor except for her bra and jeans. I bite back a chuckle as I admire her chestnut brown hair with natural red tints in them.

I look closely at the tattoos on her back. The blood pin on her left shoulder and the yin-yang on her right shoulder blade. I can see the faint scars on her back and the slightly more prominent one on her side close to her hip.

I hear a soft snore escape Bella's lips as she breathes and I use that as I take a step forward quietly making my way to the side of her bed. I fight the urge to just jump on her bed and scare the hell out of her. he's normally unpredictable when she's frightened, especially with her past.

I shake my head from those thoughts and grab my instrument and snap a few pictures of Bella and chuckle to myself. Hmm…I thought she was going to be awake at this time. It's 2 in the afternoon.

I look back at Bella's sleeping face closely. She looks so at peace…so happy. I smile to myself, how could I ever be so lucky as to find this girl? I know deep in my heart that I will never love anyone other than Bella. She's my everything, my other half, my soul mate, my sun, my moon, my, my… I'm cheesy as fuck.

I role my eyes at myself… does that even make sense? Hmm… yeah, it does. I walk swiftly over to Bella's balcony and open it and a gust of fresh air enters the room and I sigh as I lean against the railing looking at my lovely fiancé.

I feel my heart swell and skip a beat. Shit, I'm crazy about this girl. She makes me melt just with a flash of her smile, excited by just a look in her eyes, dazed by her smirk, mesmerized by her scent, aroused by her touch, in love by her voice, blessed by her words, protected by her actions, comforted by her presence, amused by just a look, and most of all loved by her just being here.

Everything about this girl screams at me that she loves me just as much as I love her. I never in the slightest bit of my life though I would ever feel this way and by what I know of her past I bet she never felt this either.

I just worry that with her past and all, she will feel… restricted. I hope she knows that it's not my wish to contain her. I don't think I have done anything to make her feel withheld. She's free as can be as far as I'm concerned. I just don't want her to go back to her self-destructive ways.

She is my world. I hope she knows that. She should, but I should show her. I should show her every day, over and over until we both die of old age. It kills me sometimes to hear her doubt my love to her. It hurts so much that she would actually think I would, or could, ever fathom the idea of leaving her.

It hurts to much to even breath just at the thought of my leaving, or, even worse, imagining her leaving. She's unpredictable… she could have anyone. Yet, she chooses me. I will never understand how her mind works, how her mind could ever picture me leaving…

Then again, her past isn't exactly stable. Her past shows, over and over, people leaving her. And that's only the part she will let me know, she still avoids parts of my questions. My heart clenches and I frown and light up quickly to have something to do while I wait for Bella to wake up.

I sit in a rocking chair that is located there and rock back and forth over and over until I can shake away my thoughts. I cherish the feeling of the vanilla flavored smoke in my lungs. It smells just like Bella.

Smokey, vanilla, peppermint and freesia. I lick my lips as I blow the smoke out, what can I do to show Bella how much I love her? Something other than what I have done… it's hard to think about.

I gave her my virginity and my body. I gave her my heart and dreams. I gave her my soul and hopes. What else is there to give this perfect girl? She gave me her heart, she gave me her soul, she gave me her past, she gave me her life practically, and she gave me a ring.

A ring that will symbolize our present, our past, our future…us. That's what it symbolizes. Us, our love. I nod to myself as I bite my lip and blow smoke threw the little gap there. Forever…

I finish up my cig and walk back in to the room with Bella and sit at the end of the bed. I run a hand over her leg and she shifts. I run my hand over her leg and once I reach her butt I smack it lightly.

Bella sighs "Alice, what on earth do you want, baby?" she asks groggily in a deep thick voice that I find incredibly sexy. I chuckle and scoot over until I'm lying next to her on the bed, my hand playing with her hair.

"Did I just wake you up?" I ask lowly. Bella nods against the pillows and I chuckle, she's such a little kid. I lean forward and kiss her cheek "Baby, wake up, I want to spend some time with you." I mumble against her cheek.

Her eyes remain closed throughout this whole time. She lifts one arm and circles it around my waist before pulling me close to her body. "Cuddle with me," she mumbles and I duck my head under her chin and hug her to me.

I snuggle against her and the bed, cherishing the warmth. "You always feel so warm…" Bella mumbles sleepily, kissing the top of my head. "Hmm, likewise," I murmur and she hugs me closer to her.

Our legs tangle and I caress her bare back, just then I remember she's not wearing a shirt. "Why aren't you wearing a shirt?" I ask. "Hmmm?" Bella mumbles. I giggle and hide my head in her neck kissing it twice before speaking "Your shirt? Why is it on the floor?" I ask.

Bella hmm's for a moment "Not sure, I think I got really hot when I got home," She murmurs. I nod and plant lazy kisses on her neck and a deep humming comes from the back of her throat. I listen carefully and it's a purr.

Like a human imitation of a purr, like a cats. I smile to myself and kiss my way up to Bella's jaw line, her cheek, until I reach her forehead and kiss it once, twice, three times before I rest my forehead on hers.

I brush my nose against hers "I love you, I love you more than life itself," I say. Bella's eyes flutter open, those deep brownish almost black eyes meet mine and I swear they smolder like melted chocolate.

"I don't think there are any other ways of showing you how deeply and irrevocably I'm in love with you," she whispers in my neck. I lean forward and am about to touch my lips to hers when Bella shoots out of the bed. I shoot up and Bella winks before walking into her bathroom.

I sigh, and lay back down on the bed. I rest my arm against my eyes and sigh as I cherish in the silence. It's always so loud at my house. Emmett's booming laugh, Rosalie tinkering in the garage, Jazz watching sports or the news, Edward's music on full blast.

I sigh in happiness when I feel the bed shift and a body cover mine. I automatically part my legs and Bella slips in between before resting both of her arms on either side of my head and I lower my hand and place it on her neck, the other on her now clothed back.

I smirk a bit, looking at her beautiful face. "Why the shirt?" I ask. She chuckles to herself and nudges my nose with hers as her lips graze mine "Because it's not all about sex with you." she whispers against my lips.

"Darn, and here I though you just wanted me because of my body." I murmur. She rolls her eyes and pulls back a bit licking her lips and looking at my eyes. "I want all of you, forever. Your body is just a pretty sweet freaking bonus," she murmurs before connecting our lips.

I smile against the kiss before kissing her back slowly, not a make out session. We're just… kissing and I love it. It reminds me of the first month of us dating. Just making out; I'm glad to see that this never changed after we had sex.

After a few minutes, Bella breaks the kiss and just rests her head on my shoulder and with a chuckle goes limp on me. I smile at the weight. I like the feeling of her weight on me, not that she is heavy at all, but still it's comfortable.

"Want to watch a movie?" Bella asks. I smile and agree and she gets off me and with another kiss we make our way down to the living room. I remember my camera and snap a few pictures of Bella before she snatches the camera from me and pins me against the wall and kisses me.

I see the flash of the light and when I open my eyes I see Bella's eyes looking back at me. She continues to kiss me with our eyes locked and I don't know why it show's me an even deeper side to her.

She cups my face and slowly closes her eyes, getting lost in the tender kiss and soon after admiring her beautiful face I close mine. I see a few more flashes behind my close eye lids but ignore it as I too cup Bella's face in my one hand.

After a moment Bella pulls away licking her lips "I swear I think that sometimes kissing you is even better then sex," she says and I can't help but to laugh in agreement. "You know, it's funny but it's true," I say and chuckle.

She shrugs and pulls away "You hungry? I can cook you breakfast… or well um, late lunch," She murmurs, looking at a watch on her wrist. I chuckle. "Sure thing, Bells," I say and with a touch of her lips on mine she pulls away and leads me to the kitchen.

I hop on to the counter as Bella raids her fridge. "Hmmm… what do you feel like eating?" she asks me. I hmm and smirk. "Well, I feel like eating a tall brunet that has me going crazy but, since I can't have that…. I guess I'll settle for a sandwich," I say smirking at Bella.

She had turned to smile at me before reaching in to the fridge and throwing something at me. I caught it and laugh when it's a green grape. I pop it in to my mouth and Bella starts taking things out of the fridge.

"What do you want on your sandwich?" she asks. I bite my lip in thought. "Anything, I'm not picky about food," I say and she lifts an eyebrow at me and smirks. "Right, I forgot. You eat even more then I do," Bella quips and I wag my eyebrows like Emmett does.

Bella laughs as she takes out a few more things and closes the fridge and walks over to me and places a grape on her lips and leans forward. She bites half of the grape and when we kiss the half grape passes from her lips to mine and she kisses me once more before licking her lips and walking over to the stove.

She places a pan on the stove and turns it on and starts placing the slices of meat on it before she starts cooking. I start snapping pictures of her and she just rolls her eyes at me as I take pictures and after she's done cooking we head to the living room with our bottles of water as we sit on the couch and Bella flips the channel's until we settle on a nice movie and eat in silence.

After we're done eating we snuggle and before I know it my eyes are dropping again as I succumb to sleep.

It feels like just a second had passed since I closed my eyes and reopened them, but it had to be more. My muscles felt heavy, my mind foggy and my breathing deep. I shift my head a bit and snuggle in to the pillow.

Wait? Pillow?... Hadn't I fallen asleep in Bella's living room? Hmm... I shift again and my eyes flutter open and look next to me to see Bella's tranquil eyes. "You're awake," she states and I give her a lazy smile as I stretch my muscles.

"Yup," I groan as I role over to look at Bella. She gives me a hint of a smile and I take my time to look in her eyes. Dark as always but… why do they look worried. I frown and cup Bella's cheek, rubbing my thumb against her cheek. "What's wrong, darling?" I ask.

She smiles and shakes her head "Nothing that should worry you. Just thinking, my mind just likes playing tricks on me," she murmurs. I look in her eyes for a long moment before sighing. "What kind of tricks does it like to play on you?" I ask giving her a tentative smile.

She smiles back "Nothing, just wondering what a letter in my safe says," she says and I frown. "A letter in your safe?" I ask. She bites her lip and nods. "My father gave me a letter before he died and told me to open it whenever I felt ready… and I'm not sure I ever will be," She explains, closing her eyes and opening them.

I bite my lip as I think it through. "But, it's a letter from your father. Aren't you curious about what he had to say to you?" I ask. She chuckles and shakes her head. "Not looking forward to this letter, baby. It holds nothing I wish to know but something I need to know." She sighs.

I shake my head. "I don't think I follow you," I say and she winks at me. "Perfect, then you understand," she says smiling and I frown and nod once and she laughs softly. "Just ignore it. I'll worry about it when I get there," she says and I nod and lean forward and kiss Bella's lips slowly.

"What about I take you out tonight?" she asks pulling back and smiling. I nod. "Sure, sounds like fun," I say and she grins. "Hmm… lets go bowling?" she asks and I pale. "Bella..." I trail off at her smile. "I'll make sure to buy you your own shoes," she adds and I shake my head.

She frowns. "Then what is it?" she asks bending her arm against the bed so that her palm can hold up her head. I blush and bite my lip "God, this is embarrassing," I mumble and Bella's eyes shine with humor.

She just loves embarrassing stories about me. "Um, I don't know how to bowl," I say and Bella laughs. "That's nothing to be embarrassed about," she says and I glare at her. "Yes it is. I'm a teenager and I don't know how to bowl. For Christ sake, Rosalie knows how to bowl," I say and Bella snickers.

"So? Just because your sister knows how doesn't mean automatically you should be a pro. I'll teach you, or we can just go play pool in the pool hall," she offers when I glare at her. I smile. "Pool, I can play pool," I say grinning.

Bella laughs softly in to my neck. "Alright, alright. We'll play pool. Now… you should probably head home before your sister starts calling again," she says, her voice muffled by my shoulder.

"Rosalie was calling?" I ask. She nods and pulls away. "Yeah, she demanded that I bring you back once you wake up. She wanted to speak to you about… clothes, I think," she murmurs and I role my eyes and grin.

"Right, we're going shopping tomorrow," I say excitedly and Bella's smile wavers. I arch an eyebrow and stare at her and she gives me a sheepish grin. "Yay, shopping," she mumbles and I laugh.

"It's alright, baby. I'm not making you come with us. Rosie and I are actually heading to Victoria Secret." I say with a grin as I see Bella's eyes glaze over before she frowns and clears her head.

"Didn't I buy you around two hundred dollars-worth of lingerie around a week ago…in Paris?" she says smiling at me. I nod and lean forward and touch my lips to hers. "You did, but these lingerie aren't for me. Rosalie and Emmett are celebrating their five year anniversary," I say and Bella nods.

"Oh, ok. Well, that explains why she was so happy on the phone," she mumbles and sits back and stretches. "You ever think your family will ever really accept me?" she asks after looking at the roof for a moment.

I frown and sit on the bed again and scooch closer to Bella. "I'm pretty sure they will soon, I don't know why they took such a disliking to you. I actually thought they had already, but you told me that it wasn't like that. So… I'm not sure. But I do hope it's soon, I just think they're over reacting. I mean, Edward is the baby and no one is making a fuss about him dating Jasper," I say bitterly and Bella sighs and kisses my forehead.

"Babe, I think I know why," Bella says and I look at her. "Really?" I ask. And she nods. "Yeah, look at it this way. You told me Esme and Carlisle knew each other since they were little," she says and I nod.

"Emmett and Rosalie have known each other since they were kids and so have Edward and Jasper. I mean, you've all known each other since you were kids. You're siblings for the most part. So, it's pretty obvious that they are worried because you are the only person who has dated outside the family…" she trails off.

I laugh. "You make us sound like a family of kissing cousins," I say and she laughs. "I didn't mean it like that. I just mean that they are wary about who you date because they don't know the people since they were kids. I mean that ex-girlfriend of yours, Gina. She set a horrible example for your family," Bella says.

I nod "She cheated on you a lot, and introduced you to weed… hit you. So, you can't blame your family for acting like that. They are just… wary of the outside people. I'll change that eventually. I just don't want to over step my grounds with your family, especially now that Esme seems to be wary of me," she says and I nod slowly.

I smile. "That just may be it, don't worry babe we have all the time in the world. Forever to be exact," I say and Bella smiles and pulls me close to her our noses brushing. "Forever is too short of a time to be with you," she whispers before we kiss.

Our lips move slowly and in sync. Bella shifts until she slowly starts to lay down and I lift up and straddle her lap as we continue to kiss sweetly. Her hand knots in my hair and mine in hers as she nibbles on my lips and I giggle softly.

She traces the tip of her tongue along my lip slowly and I moan softly as I open my mouth to her. Her tongue gently teases my own until I start to move it and a soft dance starts. Her hand caresses my jaw tenderly as her other hand cups my neck holding me to her.

I try to speed up the kiss but she has none of that and continues to kiss me at that slow pace before she takes my bottom lip in between her teeth and sucks on it, making me moan lowly as I do the same to her upper lip until she breaks it and kisses me softly once more before she starts kissing along my jaw.

"I want you…" she says softly and I hmm in pleasure as she starts to kiss my neck and I gasp out a laugh when she nibbles my pulse point. I feel my body react to Bella but let my eyes close again from when they opened when I laughed.

I tilt my head to the side giving her better access of my neck as she starts to place open mouth kisses along my neck tugging against my shirt collar. I hmm again as I feel her nibbling against my skin, god this feels so good.

Bella hums against my neck collar making me sigh as she continues to kiss my neck and I cherish the feeling. She works amazingly on my neck and after a moment she starts to trail up until my lips again.

I feel her smirk against the kiss and suddenly I realize what she was doing. I pull away from her and look at her smirking face. "You didn't," I say and she grins and leans forward until her lips are at my ear. "Oh, I so did," she says pulling away with a sexy grin.

I playfully glare at her before getting off the bed and heading to the bathroom and look at my neck to see not only one, but three hicky's from Bella. Two small ones; one at the front of my neck and the other on the side. And one big one at the base of my neck.

"Bella! Are you freaking kidding me? How am I supposed to hide three hickys? It's hard enough to hide one, but three?" I ask her looking at my neck. Her voice comes from the door way. "You're not supposed to, that's kinda my plan," she says walking in to the bathroom and standing behind me with a smile as she rests her chin on my head.

"Really and what does your plan actually stand for?" I ask. She smiles at me from the mirror. "That you don't get tempted to wear lingerie in that store and have other girls look at you," she says with a shrug.

I raise an eyebrow. "What if I wear it anyway?" I ask. She smirks "Have fun explaining to Rose how you got them and everyone will know that you're taken," she says against my ear. I roll my eyes at her. "You're so jealous," I say to her and she smiles.

"Yup, how can I not be? You in lingerie? In a store filled with other girls with almost no clothing? I just want everyone to know you're taken, or to not see your body. That's mine," she says kissing my neck again. I giggle as I pull away from her and turn around and kiss her lips hungrily. "Your right, I'm only yours," I growl out against her lips.

I feel her smile against my lips and pull me close to her and moan into our kiss. "Alice…" Bella groans out as she stops kissing my lips and leans her forehead on mine. "Baby, you're killing me here," she moans out.

I lean on my tip toes and connect our lips again and she pulls away suddenly, her breathing ragged like mine. I look in her eyes and see them black with lust. "You should head on home and call Rosalie," she says in a thick voice, lust. Yup, lust filled voice.

I smirk at her and grab the front of her shirt and pull her to me "Fuck, Rosalie. I want you," I say before I kiss her harshly and she picks me up and I tangle my legs on her waist.

We give each other sloppy kisses until she lays me on the bed. We kiss for a few more minutes until my phone beeps. "Answer it," Bella mumbles. I shake my head. "Ignore it," I breathe as I fumble to get her shirt off. "Answer it," Bella says pulling away from me.

I huff and lean over to grab my phone in the night stand. "What?" I ask. "Well, hello to you to Ali cat. Look, stop fucking Bella and get your ass over here. I need sister time before I go on my date with Emmett," Rosalie says.

I sigh. "I'll be right over," I sigh once more and hang up. Bella kisses me twice before letting me go. We both stand and walk down stairs again until we reach the door. "Go, go to your sister. I will call you before I head over at around… 8:30," she says and I nod.

I look at the watch and see that it's six. "Perfect, bye babe," I say touching my lips to hers again. She smiles. "Bye," Bella says before I walk out of her house and climb into Edwards Volvo. Shit, I really need a car…

**A/N: Well, that's it for today. I will have another chapter updated soon. Yeiii, Review, so I still know people are reading this story :P**


	43. Chapter 43

_**A/N: hey guy's. Happy holiday's! or um… whatever your religion makes you celebrate. Special thanks to A Thousand Undiscovered Stars for Beta-ing for me! i owe you! And yei! more chapters! who dosn't like it when i update a lot in one day? pffft, every one likes it. **_

_**So, let's get this over with no?**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT… but I do own this plot. **_

_**Ch.43**_

**Esme pov**

****Once Alice gets home I walk over to her. "Alice, darling. Where have you been all day?" I ask, even though I know the answer. She was at Bella's house. "I was with Bella. She crashed pretty hard last night." she says. I raise an eyebrow. "That party she threw... did it have alcohol?" I ask, unable to keep the disapproval from my tone. Alice sighs and runs a hand threw her hair after she hangs her jacket.

She nods "Yeah, mom. All high school parties have alcohol. It's not a big deal," Alice says as she walks to the kitchen and I follow after her. "Alice, you know your father and I don't approve of under aged drinking," I say. Alice bites her lip and takes a water bottle out of the fridge.

"Yeah, mom. I know, but why are you acting like Bella is the only bad guy? I mean, my siblings were all drinking. Why just blame Bella?" she asks. I bite the inside of my cheeks. "Alice, I know you think you feel strongly for Bella... but, I don't exactly think it's healthy for you two to spend all your free time together," I say.

Alice choked on the water she was drinking. "You're kidding right?" she asks me. I frown and shake my head. "I'm not." I say and Alice laughs a bit loudly. "And this is coming from the woman who is mother of five teenagers who the other four are dating. They spend all the time in the world together and you have never had a problem with that beforehand." Alice says.

I shake my head. "That is completely different. We don't know Bella. She hasn't gained our trust or proven to us that she deserves to be with you." I say, the image of the magazine that is safely in my room flashes behind my eyes. My face turns hard. "Really, mom. Bella, you're talking about a girl who has her whole future mapped out and already in action. She is the perfect person for me. I'm actually a bit hurt to tell you all the truth." she says.

I lift an eyebrow, why on earth would she feel hurt? "Why?" I ask. She stares at me. "You won't even give her a chance mom! Edward, my little brother! is dating my older brother and yet, that is fine. It's ok. Emmett and Rosalie have dated for five years! five, and you have never had a problem with anything. But, when it comes down to me everyone is against it! What is it mom? Is it really that you can't bear to see me happy? Because it's ridiculous." she says.

"You will not speak to me in that tone of voice young lady, I am your mother and I deserve respect." I say sternly. Alice looks at me and a hint of a smirk plays on her lips and she bows. "What do you want mother? For me to bow at your wish? You want me to stay in my room for the rest of my life and not be happy?" she asks.

I touch my hand to my forehead "It's not what I'm asking at all. I'm just asking you to be careful with a person like Bella." I say. Alice laughs. "Exactly what do you mean when you guys say a 'person like Bella?' what do you mean? Rich? Funny? Protective? Lovable? Independent?" Alice asks.

I shake my head "I mean, unstable. Everything about her past and her actions scream unstable! She's not in the right mind. Carlisle told me that she was in medication for depression and other mental illnesses, what if she suddenly snaps?" I ask. Alice looks at me in shock.

"Dad... dad told you... he can't do that! It's against the law! What ever happened to doctor-patient confidentiality? Mom! Can't you guys see how crazy you are acting? You're both lucky I don't just go over and tell Bella so that she can sue dad!" she says.

I wince. "Mary Alice Brandon Cullen, you would sell out your family for your girlfriend. A person you hardly even know?" I ask, hurt to hear the words she had just spoken. We do it because we care, Bella is not in a fit state of mind. I doubt she can even feel. "I know her better than any of you ever will. And if you just... if you just gave her a chance. One, I could show you all what she's really like. She's polite and smart and God, she has traveled so much. Just give her a chance mom. Please, I'm just begging you here. This is really putting a strain in my relationship with Bella mom... I don't think we will be able to look past this if it keeps being an issue for us." Alice says softly.

My face softens and I sigh. "I'll see what I can do, Alice. But I still do not trust Bella. As far as I am concerned, she is menace. And she is a potential threat to you and our family." I say as I turn to wash the dishes. "All I'm asking here is for a chance mom... not a heard donation." Alice says quietly as she walks out of the room. I sigh and look out the window.

I still don't like the idea of Alice and Bella... and besides. They were together all day, I wonder if they have... consummated their relationship... God, I can't even think it. I shake my head as I wash the dishes. I don't know what to do...

_**Bpov**_

I sit on the couch and start flipping through channels. Alice just left and well, I'm bored. Hmm.. I don't like the idea of Alice walking around and I know she hates her siblings always having to borrow a car. And the fact that her younger brother has a car and she doesn't... her parents haven't bought her a car… I know for a fact that she has a license already.

Would she mind if I bought her a car? What kind of car would she like?... I know she likes yellow. So probably a yellow car. It has to be fast, what's the joy of driving if she can't go fast?... would her parents mind if I bought her a car?

I mean, I can buy a car in a snap. I can pay for the whole car in just one swipe. Hell, I could even pay it in cash. I sigh and continue to flip through channels until I reach CNN and let it there as background noise.

Would Alice even want a car? Would she accept it?... hmmm, maybe I should start with something simpler. Maybe she would like to learn how to ride a motorcycle?... no, that's too dangerous. But… what if she wants to learn how to ride? Shit.

I bite my lip and settle even deeper in the sofa and prop my feet on the coffee table. Ok, if Alice wants to learn I will show her, but… I will buy her one of the less fast, more… controlled motorcycles and insist on her riding it only when I'm around. Or with her.

If not, I will just go with her to the dealership and buy her a yellow car. I nod to myself and stand and walk to the kitchen. I grab an apple from the fridge and take a bite. I chew slowly as I look threw my fridge.

I need to go grocery shopping soon. I look at the clock and shrug, I have time. I grab a piece of paper from the drawer and start to make a list of all the stuff I need. Adding a few things for around the house.

I nod to myself and walk back to the living room and turning off the TV. I grab the keys for my Mercedes and after locking the house up I drive out. I take a cool breezy drive with the top down and I bob my head to the beat of a rock song set lowly.

Once I reach the market I park my car and walk in to the store. I grab a squeaky car and continue to walk around grabbing the things I need. I was just turning the corner when my cart hits another.

"Oh, my bad." I say and look up from my list to see… Heidi. I offer her a smile. "Hey, Heidi. What's up?" I ask. She smiles. "Hey, Bell. Nothing much, mom's sick so I'm just shopping to help her out." She says.

I nod "Well, I hope she feel better." I say and she gives me a smile "Thank you, so: shopping Bell? You suck at shopping." She states and I frown and look at the carts contents. "I don't suck, at shopping. Is it even possible to suck at shopping?" I ask her.

Heidi giggles "It is, if your you." she says she looks at my carts contents. "All you have here is microwave diners and stuff you can do in five minutes." She says and I shrug. "I'm not particularly good at cooking… or waiting." I say and Heidi laughs.

"No shit? I still remember when you almost burned down your house cooking spaghetti." She teases and I shift. "Not my fault, you were with me and distracting me I might add." I say and she laughs again. I smile, it is been a while since I even talked to Heidi. I just remembered that I actually like her very much, if only as a friend.

"Speaking of distractions your with. How's your new pet?" she asks and I role my eyes. "You mean Alice?" I ask. She shrugs and I lean against the shopping cart. "She's not a pet and she's fine." I say. And Heidi smiles "Good, good. Is she still a virgin?" she asks and I stop and shake my head.

"Why are you asking?" I ask. Heidi smiles "No reason, it's just that last time I actually took the time to speak to her, let's just say we didn't really speak." She says. I raise an eyebrow "What do you mean by that?" I ask.

Heidi bites her lip and winks at me "I think you know exactly what I mean, Bell. Me and Alice hooked up, after she was with Kate." She says and in my mind I add. _Me and Alice where almost together for that part…_

I clench my jaw and shrug, "Well, she's mine now. And I'm not Kate." I say and Heidi laughs and shakes her head "Oh, I know you're not like Kate." she says and again, bites her lip. Shit, what is with the lip biting?

"Well, I know that when we hooked up. She kinda freaked out when I tried to…" Heidi trails off and I bite back a growl. I glare at nothing. "Well, I'm sure that will never happen again, Heidi." I say and she chuckles "Please, Bell. Don't be like that, you used to love to share." She says smirking.

I stand taller and glare at Heidi, "I've changed, I'm not like that anymore. I love Alice, and I've made choices that have changed my life for the better." I say and she smirks "Have you really changed? You sure? I still see the hot headed Bella that keeps up a wall for everyone. You may think, you've changed. But I'm pretty sure all you need is a… push and you'll slip from this saint act you have going on." Heidi says smirking at me.

I frown, have I changed? Yes! What the fuck? Don't let Heidi play mind games. You're the player, you play with HER mind. Not the other way around. I smirk and step a bit closer for the intimidating factor. Not, that it's ever worked on Heidi before.

"This isn't an act." I say and Heidi smirks "You didn't say anything about changing." She adds and I huff. "I don't really care, what you think. I know I've changed." I say and she smirks. "Who knows you better Bella?" she asks and I roll my eyes. "Alice does." I say and she smirks to herself, nods and looks at her watch.

"Well, if you say so. I must go, now. If I were you I would keep a tight leash on your girl Bell. She may be more of a player then even you. Oh, and please try to cook yourself a decent meal. If you want I can cook for you one day, all you have to do is call." She says and with that she kisses my cheek and walks away.

I stay there frazzled for a moment before shaking my head and grabbing a few more things. Including some stuff that would include in a decent meal. I pay for everything quickly and carry my bags to the back seat.

Heidi had to be kidding right? I knew Alice and Heidi kissed that day at the beach oh so long ago but… nah, not possible. I shake my head. "Heidi is full of shit." I mumble to myself as I pull out of the market and on to the road.

I bite my lip as I drive down the streets… what did Heidi mean when she said 'who knows me better?' and when she said 'Oh, I know you aren't like Kate' Is she implying that she's better than me? No. Kate is a pest… I'm just… I shake my head furiously.

Kate is a bitch, I am just Bella. A player… I mean, I was a player. I'm Alice's Bella. I changed. It was my choice. Choice's… I've made so many bad choices in my life. But, I've also made a lot of good ones.

But… nah. Alice and Heidi did not hook up after Kate… did they? How far did they go? I know they didn't go all the way because I broke her hymen, I took her virginity. So… but did Heidi and Alice have sex without breaking Alice's hymen?

I shake my head. No, Alice would tell me… wouldn't she? Yes, yes she would. I pull in to my drive way and grab the bags of food and place them in the kitchen in three trips. I put the car in the garage and walk back in.

I start organizing everything in cabinets and the fridge wile my mind continues to fuck me. Heidi.. Kate.. Alice. And what is up with Kate? Why did she speak to Alice? Why is she always near her when I'm not around? Is Heidi like that when I'm not around? I shake my head and run a hand threw my hair.

Fuck, Heidi really can fuck my mind. I take a deep breath and calm down a bit, Alice would tell me if anything ever happened. She loves me. Doesn't she? Yes, what the fuck? Of course she does.

I grab my pack of cigarettes from my pocket and light up, "I'm going fucking crazy." I sigh as I walk through the house and up to my room. I go to walk over at the balcony and find the guitar case in the corner.

I nod and grab it and move to the balcony after switching on the light. I lean against the railing and strum a few cords. "She loves me… she loves me not. She loves me. She loves me not. She loves me, she loves me. She loves me.. she loves me. Nowhere to turn, no one to help. It's almost like I don't even know myself. Now I have to choose, I don't know what to do..."

I close my eyes and grab the guitar by its neck and an image of Alice and Heidi flash behind my eyes and I launch the guitar against the railing. I hear it crack and crunch but I don't open my eyes. I throw it again against the railing and I feel a cord fly up and smack me against the wrist.

I drop the guitar and walk back to my room and pace. She wasn't with me, Alice was single. She was single, I kissed people too. I kissed a lot of people after that kiss. Alice did nothing wrong.

"Alice, didn't do anything wrong." I repeat to myself as I squish my eyes closed and place a fist against my forehead. Why am I so angry? I can feel it. A slow bubbling boiling hot underneath my skin and through my veins.

I shake my head and take off my shirt and walk to the shower. I take an ice cold shower and get dressed. I walk over to the balcony and grab the pieces of my guitar. I'll have to buy a new one now.

Stupid tantrum. I sigh and throw the guitar pieces in the fireplace and walk back up to my room and finish getting ready. I place a leather cuff on my wrist to cover the red mark the guitar cord made.

I place a leather jacket over my shirt and walk down the steps turning off the lights on my way. I grab my motorcycle keys and lock up the house. I get on my bike and I speed down the driveway and to the road.

I stop my bike on the driveway and take out my cell and txt Alice that I'm heading out to pick her up. I take a small detour to Susannah and Caius's to buy a bucket of flowers and after tucking them into my jacket loosely careful not to squish them I drive to Alice's house.

Once I get there I park my bike and take the flowers out. I look them over and sigh, they look perfect. I put the helmet on the seat and walk up the drive way. I walk up the steps and ring the doorbell once and take a step back.

I hear footsteps and the door opens to reveal Esme. I smile and give her a nod. "Hello, Esme. How are you?" I ask. She gives me a tiny smile. "Hello, Bella. I'm doing well, please come in. Alice should be down shortly." She says taking a step back and I enter the house.

I pluck a blue daisy from the bucket and offer it to her. "I know Alice isn't a fan of Daisy's but you are." I say and hand her the single daisy in the whole flower arrangement. Esme gives me a smile and takes it. "Thank you, Bella. It's lovely, how have you been?" she asks. I give her a smile. "I've been doing well, investments are up and my company is running smoothly." I say and she nods.

"Mom! Do you know where I placed my Jacket? I can't find it!" Alice calls while walking down the steps. I lean against the door and watch her as she walks down the steps typing away on her phone.

I chuckle lowly and her head snaps up "Oh, Bella. I was just about to call you to ask where you where… I'm guessing you were looking for those." She says motioning to the flowers. I frown. "Who said these were for you? I just happen to carry around flowers ever now and then." I say rolling my eyes as I walk over to her and offer them to her.

She chuckles and takes them and admires them for a moment before looking at me and placing a soft kiss against my lips and hugs me. I chuckle and hug her back. "Thank you, I love them." She says. I kiss the top of her head. "Anytime." I say and she pulls back with a smile.

"I need a vase." She states and grabs my hand and walks with me and Esme to the kitchen dropping my hand and ducking under the sink and grabbing a crystal vase. She fills it half with water and then places the flowers in them and sighs "They're beautiful, Bella. Where did you get them?" she asks.

I smile. "Susannah and Caius. The back is a flower shop." I say and she smiles. "Well I should stop by to thank them." She says and I smile "I bet they would like that." I say and Alice grins.

Esme clears her though "Where exactly are you going today?" she asks. I shift not sure, if Esme would approve of playing pool at the pool hall. I look at Alice quickly and see her with the same look and I grin. "Well, we are heading to the bowling alley. Alice said she wanted to learn how." I say and Esme stiffs a laugh.

"Alice, remember the time-" she's cut off my Alice's yell. "MOM! No! Don't tell that story, please." Alice begs and I grin wider. "Oh, Esme please tell that story. Alice hush, your mother is speaking." I say adding a wink.

Alice glares at me and Esme laughs softly "Well, Alice was thirteen and we decided it was a good idea to head to the bowling alley for a family night. So, were playing and we notice that Alice is glaring at a pink bowling ball. We urge her to pick it up and play and she huffs but walks over and pulls it back to throw. Now, I don't exactly know how. But the ball over powered the small girl and she launched it and managed to get tangled and trips and lands in the gutters." Esme says and I laugh.

Alice is huffing furiously and I try to quiet down a bit. I laugh again and stand up and kiss the top of her head. "Don't worry, babe. It's cute." I say chuckling and she huffs. "No, it's not. It's embarrassing." She says and I roll my eyes.

"It's adorable, and I won't let you trip." I add and snicker in to her neck. "Oh, hush up. And come on, were going to be late." She says. I chuckle "Fine, fine. Go find your jacket and helmet." I add and she jumps excitedly.

"I love your bike. Emmett is totally jealous that I get to ride with you." she adds and walks off to the foyer closet. I chuckle and walk over to her and laugh. "Alice, I thought you were out of the closet." I say and she throws a jacket at me.

I grab it and laugh "Alice what are you looking for?" I ask holding the jacket in front of me. "My jacket, the one you gave me." she say shuffling threw the closet jackets. I chuckle "Baby, look at me." I say and when she does she palms her face. "I am a dork." She mumbles as she walks over to me and grabs the jacket and walks past me.

I chuckle to myself as I follow after her. "You are, but you're my dork." I say and kiss her cheek. My goofy girl. I sigh as I follow her up to her room and once the door is closed behind us I spin her by her waist and connect our lips. I pull her against me a bit roughly and kiss her with a deep hunger. She freezes but then places her hands behind my neck and kisses me back.

_Love me. Tell me it's a lie. Please, tell me it's a lie. You didn't kiss Heidi, anyone but Heidi._ I think in my head as I kiss her. "I love you." I say against her lips in the kiss. She kisses me pulling me tighter to her "I love you." she repeats and when her mouth is open I slide my tongue in her mouth.

She takes a big inhale but still kisses me back. I don't know why I got a bit angry, I think there's something fucked up in my mind. Fucking Heidi is mind fucking me. I sigh and break the kiss and place my forehead against hers panting slightly.

"What was… that for?" Alice asks between pants. I smile at her "No reason." I mumble and touch my lips to hers. I step back and look over her room and smile. "More sketches?" I ask.

"Um, yeah... I've gotten really in to it after getting back from Paris." She says and I smile as I walk over to them. I look them over and grin. "You have serious talent, Al." I say and Alice walks up behind me and slides her hands around my waist. Standing on her tip toes to rest her chin on my shoulder. "Thank you." she says quietly.

I nod and check my watch "We should get going, I don't want to keep you out too late." I say and she shrugs "Mom and Dad are actually going to stay in Seattle tonight. Didn't you notice that mom is dressed up?" she asks.

I shrug "I just assumed she came back from a fund raiser or something." I say and Alice nods against my shoulder before dropping her arms and stepping back and scooping up the helmet I gave her from the bed.

"Let's go, rider." She says and I just follow her down the stairs and out the house. She says bye to Esme and I stop and let her climb on after me. I take off slowly not in a particular hurry.

"So, Alice. Your birthday is coming up. What do you want?" I ask her. I had left my reflector up and so had Alice. I feel her shrug behind me "Nothing, I'm happy and I don't really need anything." She says.

I chuckle "Just because you don't need anything doesn't mean you don't WANT anything." I say and she chuckles. "All I really want, is you." she says. And I feel my heart tug and I grin. "You already have me, Ali. So, something else?" I ask. She hmm's "I'm not sure." She says.

"Well… what about riding lessons?" I ask tentatively. "What?" she asks. I shrug. "Um, well. I know you like riding on my bike so, I was wondering if you wanted some riding lessons." I say. "It's ok, if you don't want any, I was just guessing." I mumble as I pull out to the highway.

Like everything in Forks, the pool house wasn't there. It was just outside Forks, on a corner of the road. She squeezes me tighter. "I would love riding lessons." She says and I sigh in relief. "Ok, I'll ask Jake if he still has a starter bike I can buy off him." I say and she lifts her head form my shoulder.

"I don't know, isn't it going to be expensive. Maybe I can pay for half of it?" she says and I shake my head "Not a chance, it's your gift." I say and she sighs. "I would argue, but I know how stubborn you are." She says and I laugh and stir the engine more.

"Hold on tight." I say and slide my shield closed and I feel one of Alice's arms disappear from me and I feel her nod and hold on to me tighter. I gun it and I hear her yelp and cheer. I laugh softly and gun it a bit more, ok, so maybe I'm showing off but sue me. I know what I'm doing.

"Hold on tight." I say and I feel her grab even tighter and I take a deep breath and lift the front tire in a wheelie. "Oh, my god!" I hear Alice yell gleefully and I chuckle as I touch the tire down again. "Bella, that was awesome!" Alice says loudly. I grin to myself and a car is out in front of us.

I catch up to it and again pop a wheelie as I pass it. I chuckle to myself as I blow down the street and slowly start taking off speed as I know we're getting closer. The rest of the ride is passed silently.

Once we reach the place I park near the front and Alice slides off the seat and I turn off the bike and hop off. Once I place the helmet on my hip Alice touches her lips to mine firmly.

We don't move our lips it's just… there. It's perfect in its own way. I hold her around the waist with my free hand and she pulls away slowly her eyes smoldering to mine. "Mind if I sleep over tonight?" she asks. I smile and shake my head. "Not at all." I mumble and she flashes me a grin and touches her lips to mine again.

"I would invite you to my house, but Emmett and Rose will be back later tonight and… they're not exactly quiet." She mumbles and I chuckle quietly and nod. "Its good, I don't mind." I say and she nods and after another peck I pull away and run my hand to her neck and grab the zipper of her/my jacket and pull it down gently.

I tuck my hand in to her jacket and hold her to me and I place the helmet on the bike and with my free hand I reach for her neck and pull the chain from her collar where it's under her shirt, tucked in. I feel my lips twitch up and I slowly pull it out feeing the cool chain change to warm metal under my fingers until I have the ring on my fingertips.

I lift it to my lips and kiss it before looking at her eyes and retracting my arm from inside her jacket and reaching for the clasp. I slide the ring out and re clasp the necklace and slide the ring on her finger.

"I love you." I remind her and she cups my cheek and runs her thumb across my lower lip as she inches closer. "I love you too." She says and pecks my lips. The kiss is chaste and with a smile I grab my helmet and she grabs her and hand in hand we walk into the pool hall.

I walk over to the guy at the register behind the bar and give him a ten to hold on to our helmets. And give him a five dollar bill so he can change in to quarters. I walk with Alice to the pool area and I smile. This place is awesome, it's a teen pool hall. Its brightly lit and offers an area for food and pizza.

Me and Alice walk to an empty pool table and put the quarters in the machine and set up. "Who breaks?" I ask. Alice grins. "Me." she says and I nod and take the triangle out and grab the Cue stick's and hand one to Alice.

She grabs the chalk and rubs it on the tip before leaning over the table with her jacket open giving me a pretty good view up her shirt. She hmm's. "Bella, can you teach me how to break?" she asks.

I raise an eyebrow but smirk "Sure, babe." I say and lean my cue against the table as I walk over to Alice and lean over her taking her hand in mine and lining her up. My mouth is right behind her ear.

"Now, all you have to do is pull back.." I say as I pull a bit away from her. "And strike." I say and use my body as momentum, bumping in to Alice softly as the cue tip hits the cue ball and it flies out and breaks.

It sinks one striped ball and I nod "Exactly like that." I mumble and pull away from her. "Thank you." Alice says and shoots but misses "I guess I need more lessons." She says. I smirk as I grab my stick and line up behind the cue. I look up to see Alice staring at my ass.

I hold back a laugh as I launch the cue ball against the balls. "So, you like the idea of riding lessons?" I ask. Alice nods and grins. "Yeah, I really love the idea. I've always wanted to learn." She says.

I nod and bite the inside of my cheeks. "Well, I have a few conditions to teaching you how to ride." I say. She raises an eyebrow as she launches the cue and sinks a ball. "What are they?" she asks. I smile to myself a bit as I walk around the table so that she can line up.

"Well, first you have to promise me you won't do anything stupid like ride it on a rainy day or speed excessively." I say. She purses her lips and nods. "Understandable, the next?" she asks as she aims and misses. I line up and shoot sinking one ball.

"You need to wear your gear at all time. The helmet, the padded jacket, the gloves, the boots. Anything invented that can keep you safe if you fall of the bike." I say and this time she nods a bit more hesitantly. "Ok, next one?" she asks and I shoot sinking another ball.

"You can't ride at the beginning unless I'm with or around you." I say and she nods again. "I'm getting the vibe here that every single condition has to do with my safety." She says and I nod.

"It does." I say and throw but miss. I look at her and she smiles to herself as she lines up "Why, Bella. If I didn't know any better I would say you were worried about me getting hurt." She says.

I nod "I am, I would never forgive myself if you ever got hurt because of something I taught you how to do." I say and she misses the cue. "Bella…" she says trailing off and I look at the table. "You can have a do over." I say motioning to the table. She shakes her head from her thoughts and nods.

The rest of the game is passed with small talk and jokes. I tell her about the time I was playing and I hit the cue so hard it bounced over the rail and hit a guy in the stem and berries.

That caused her to almost pee her pants laughing. After we had finished the five games we headed over to the food place and ordered a small pepperoni pizza with two cokes. We spend dinner just talking about things we enjoy and things we should do soon.

"We should go to the meadow." Alice says and I nod in agreement as I swallow a piece of pizza. "Yeah, we can even go to the springs. They feel amazing." I say and Alice grins. "That would be awesome." She says. And I shrug. "We can go tomorrow if you want." I offer.

Her eyes go wide with excitement. "Yes, that would be awesome!" she says excitedly and I laugh softly. "Then its set, tomorrow to the springs." I say and she grins. "Man, your perfect. How did I ever land a catch like you?" she asks.

I role my eyes "Alice, I'm everything but perfect." I say taking a sip from my soda. "Your perfect to me." she says and I nod "Then you have some pretty fucked up ideas about what perfect is." I tease. She rolls her eyes. "Must you always be difficult when I'm trying to compliment you?" she asks.

I shrug. "I'm not one for compliments." I say and Alice holds my hand and gives it a squeeze. "That's because you've never had anyone you've wanted to hear them from. But now you have me and I'm one hell of a sappy romantic." She says and I laugh softly and play with her fingers.

"Like I didn't know that, baby. We have been together for a few months." I remind her and she shrugs "There are a lot of things you still don't know about me." she says and suddenly my smile falters. _Will she tell me about her and Heidi? I mean, Heidi is hotter than me. She's nice and seductive and if she wanted she could steal Alice away from me. _I feel my stomach drop a bit and a small furry burn under my veins.

I try to mask it with humor. "Really? Like?" I ask. Alice thinks for a moment tilting her head "Well, I bet you didn't know I would go straight if Leonardo DiCaprio offered to be mine." She says and I choke on my soda laughing.

I feel my chest burn and I caught a few times laughing "You have got to be kidding me." I say. She shakes her head "I'm fucking serious. I have had the biggest crush on him since Titanic and Romeo and Juliet." She says and I nod.

"Fuck, it's true. He is hot, but then again I am bi. You're the designated gay." I say and Alice flips me off as she takes a drink of her soda. "Fuck off." She says and I laugh as I take a bite of pizza.

Hmm.. "I bet you didn't know that one of my favorite movies of all time is Lion King 1 and 2." I say and Alice looks up at me and chuckles. "For real?" she asks and I nod. "Rafiky is the fucking bomb." I say and Alice laughs. "I love that movie." She says.

"I like the second one a bit more. I love the hole Kovu and Kiara drama. I wonder what it reminds me of." I say looking at her. She smirks. "So, your telling me I'm Kiara and your Kovu?" she ask.

I pout. "Why am I always the guy?" I ask. She shrugs "You hate skirts, don't wear dresses, you're the tougher one. Face it baby, you're the butch in this relationship." She says.

What a bitch, but I love her because of it. "Fine, I'm butch. I knew I had the pants in this relationship." I say with a smirk. She smirks back. "But we both know I set the rules." She says. I snort "Since when? Your submissive and I'm not." I say with a shrug.

She pouts. "I'm just a bit new at all this sex thing." She says and I shrug "It's not a bad thing, Ali. I like that your more easy and soft in bed and in the relationship." I say and she frowns and looks at me.

"Why?" she asks and I drum my fingers against the table and sigh "I'm not completely sure." I finish with a shrug. Alice laughs softly. "You're such an enigma Bella." She says. I raise an eyebrow. "How so?" I ask. She shrugs "Just when I think I've come closer to scraping the surface, you mesmerize me and I have so much more about you to think about." She says.

I bite my lip and nod. "Thinking is a dangerous hobby, Al. The mind likes to play tricks." I comment tapping my temple. Alice grabs her glass of soda and tilts it to me "So is everything else in life." She says and I smirk and touch my glass to hers "To danger." I cheer. Alice chuckles. "To danger." She amends and we clink our glasses and take a sip finishing the sodas.

I look at the pizza to see that we had eaten it all and so had the soda. I look over to Alice. "So, do you want to play another game or do you want to head on home and maybe watch a movie?" I ask.

Alice raises an eyebrow "Home?" she asks. I nod "Yes, my house." I say and Alice's eyes shine. "And since when is that home?" she asks teasing, though I know there is some truth to her words. I smile slightly. "Because you are always welcome and besides, what's mine is yours, my lovely fiancé." I say and Alice smiles to herself.

"God, you are perfect." she says and I roll my eyes "Hardly, I'm just a cheesy romantic. Something I inherited from my father." I say and Alice smiles. "Come on Bell, let's go home. I want nothing more than to snuggle with you." she says. I smile, snuggling with Alice sounds good.

I stand and place thirty bucks on the table for the food and tip and walk to the cash register in the bar and pick up our helmets. After that we walk out and I quickly dig in my pockets for a cig and a light.

Alice takes out one of her own and I light hers first and then mine and we lean against the outside wall. We smoke relaxingly making small talk and somehow we end up making out, me pinning Alice against the wall but our cigs are still lit.

I break away from her and take a long as fuck drag before throwing it on the ground and putting it out with my foot and hold in the smoke as I kiss Alice. I pull away and blow out the smoke to see Alice taking a drag, before doing the exact same thing I did. Once she let go of the air and she takes a deep breath I connect our lips "About… cuddling…. Mind if we… do something…. Instead?" I offer in between kisses. I feel Alice's smirk against my lips. "You want to fuck?" she asks and I feel a wave of arousal wash threw me… did my little innocent angel just say 'fuck'?... shit that's hot.

I nod dumb struck against her face "Yeah..." I mumble before I grabbed her waist and sipped up her jacket. After that I zipped up my jacket and after we are both on my bike I drive down smoothly.

Once we reach home well, let's just say we didn't sleep much.

I wake up early in the morning with a banging head ache. I role to my side and I don't know how, I fell off my bed. "Mother fucker." I grumble. "Baby? Are you ok?" comes Alice's groggy reply. I grumble as I stand up "Yeah, I'm fine." I mumble as I walk to the end of the bed and slip on some clothes and walk to the bathroom to brush my teeth.

My head keeps throbbing. "I should have something around here…" I mumble as I open my cabinet and look threw my pills. One catches my attention "Valium..." I mumble. I had been ignoring my depression pills lately. The doctor told me not to skip any doses.

I sigh and twist the cap, I drink two. One for the depression the second for the headache. I down it with water and walk back to bed. I lay down "Bell, what time is it?" Alice asks. I rub my eyes and look at the clock "Um, 9:06" I say.

Alice jumps out of the bed. "What?!" she asks. I sit up "9:06." I say and I see Alice run around the room grabbing her clothes. "Shit, shit, shit." she mumbles. "Baby, what's wrong?" I ask. "Bella, I'm supposed to be home by now. Me and Kate need to work on our theater act." She says.

My interest is peaked. "What theater project?" I ask with a frown. "The one, that if you ever bothered entering class would have been assigned to you." she says. I roll my eyes "Theater is boring." I say as I lean back down on the bed. "Actually it's not, it's pretty fun. If you would ever bother showing up." She mutters. I groan. "Let's not have _that_ conversation again." I say.

"Well, come on Bella. Its kinda ridicules that you don't really care about school." She says. I groan. "Let's not have _that_ conversation either." I mumble. Alice laughs. "Then what conversation do you want to have?" she asks.

I sit up and grab her arm and pull her on the bed and touch my lips to hers "How about we have the conversation about how to not have a conversation." I say as I kiss her again. I smile against her lips as I trail kisses down to her neck. "Bella… come on, no… I really need to get home… Kate should be at my house in an hour." She says.

I shrug and pull her closer to me "Who cares? Kate can go fuck herself for all I care." I mumble as I trail my hand down Alice's thy. "Fuck, Bella..." Alice moans softly when I start to place open mouth kisses along her weak spot on her neck.

"Bella, Bella stop." Alice says. I run my hand along her sides "Shh… let loose." I mumble as I start to kiss under her ear. "Knock it off." Alice says and pushes off me. I freeze as she gets off the bed. "Err… did I do something?" I ask. "No, I just really need to go." She says and slips on her shirt and grabs a come from my dresser and runs it threw her hair.

I groan and get up and switch my boxer's for some jeans. "What are you doing?" Alice asks. I take off my shirt and walk to the closet "I'm getting dressed." I say as I take off my wife beater, put on a bra and put on a button down shirt. "Yeah, I can see that… why?" Alice asks.

I shrug "I'm dropping you off at your place and I think it would be nice to get some breakfast." I say. "Didn't you just shop for food yesterday?" Alice asks with a laugh. I roll my eyes "I didn't buy anything for breakfast. I rather go to the dinner." I say as I bunch my hair up in a ponytail.

"Which diner?" she asks. I bite my lip in though, "Hmm… I could really use some chocolate chip waffles." I say. "Isn't that where that girl you fucked works?" Alice asks. I chuckle as I tie my shoes "Um, it's one of the many." I say laughing. "Since when are you curious about the people I've fucked?" I ask as I pop a piece of gum in my mouth.

Alice shrugs "It may have been brought up to my attention." She mumbles as she slips on a shirt. I raise an eyebrow and sit on my bed "By who?" I ask with a grin. "Kate may have brought it up once or twice during rehearsals." She says. I frown. "So, Kate has an interest in my sex life?... hmmm maybe you should tell her to butt out." I offer as I stand from the bed and walk over to her.

"Cuz, in reality. I don't think she will like hearing about you and me… all the time." I ask against her ear as I start to kiss her neck. Alice laughs "Kate just brought it up because I asked how many people have you fucked in the drama class… I was a bit surprised to see that there were a few girls you spared." Alice teases.

I laugh and lean my head on her shoulder. "Well, they weren't exactly immune to me. Let's just say they were playing hard to get." I mumble. Alice laughs and pushes me "Bull shit, they are straighter then a ruler." She says.

I shrug. "I've had sex with many straight girls, so trust me. That wasn't an issue." I say as I walk out the room with Alice behind me. "So… how many people have you slept with, like ever?" she asks. I hmm deep in thought. "Hmm, it's hard to tell, I really lost count but around… sixty… more or less." I say with a shrug.

"You are such a ho." Alice says and smacks my butt as she walks down quickly. I laugh "I ain' no ho, bitch." I say and she laughs. "Sure, Bell. Keep telling yourself that." She says. I shrug. "Don't really care about tittles." I sigh.

"So, you dodged my question. Are you going to that diner?" she asks. I nod my head. "Yeah, I mean. It's the only waffle place in town and its good food." I say with a shrug. "Will she be there?" Alice asks. I frown "I don't know, I guess. She does work there, but I don't have her work schedule memorized if that's what you're asking." I say.

Alice nods, "Alright then." She says and walks out the front door. I stop at the threshold and frown… "The fuck?" I mumble as I shake my head grab my jacket and slip out of my house.

**A/N: yeiiiiiiiii, more chapters! Review!**


	44. Chapter 44

_**A/N: Here it is yet another chapter of Choices. Hope you guys all like this chapter!**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**_

_**CH.44.**_

_**Bpov. **_

I drop Alice off at her house and after a peck on the lips she walks to her door. I stand there feeling like an idiot before I shake my head and climb back in. Is Alice jealous that I'm going to see… fuck, what's her name again? Jenny? Jenna? Michele?

Fuck, I don't know. And I don't care. I sigh as I drive on the road passing a few cars on the way. I drum my fingers against the weal as I drive down the road "What can I say, what can I do? This is who I am and I'm loving you. What can I say, what can I do. No matter how true my feelings are, I always end up hurting you." I sing along.

I pull in to the waffle house, diner. I park my car and climb out. The girl isn't there. Shit, I really wanted to know her name. I shrug and order chocolate chip waffles and take a seat. Once my food reaches me I eat up. My mouth full when some girl sits in my booth. "Hey." The girl says.

I nod and swallow. "Um, hey." I say before I take a sip of my coffee. "I was wondering if you would mind me sitting here." She says. I shake my head. "Not at all." I say and the girl gets more comfortable and flashes me a smile, I grin as I wipe my mouth with a napkin.

"My name is Tina, by the way." She says. I look at her, her blue eyes, blond hair, pale skin… fuck, she's hot. Nothing wrong with talking to a hot girl right?... I settle back in my seat and grin. I haven't seen this girl in town before. I nod "I'm, Bella." I say. She smiles. "Nice to meet you." she says I nod.

"So, you new to town? I've never seen you around and I know everybody." I say flashing her my signature grin. She smiles a pearly white smile and show's dimples "Do you?... and to answer your question. I'm just passing through with my friends from college. We decided to take a short camping trip out here in the mountains. I'm actually from Seattle Tech." she says.

I nod twice. "Oh… nice." I say and laugh softly. Tina raises an eyebrow a smile playing on her full lips, wait, what am I doing staring at her lips? I look back to my plate. "What's so funny?" she asks. I bite my lip and take a drink of my coffee. "Oh, nothing it's just that… you don't really seem the dirt and grime kind of girl. Camping seems like the last thing you would ever do." I say. Tina smiles. "Oh? I can handle any dirt." She says suggestively.

I hold back my laugh and smirk. "Oh, I don't have a doubt in my mind that if you put your mind to it, you could accomplish almost anything." I say and eat a piece of my waffle. She raises an eyebrow. "Almost? What makes you think I can't do everything?" she asks with a smile.

I put my cup down and look at her with a grin. "Because then you would be me, and it's just not possible." I say with a wink. What? It's just innocent flirting, besides its kind of fun. It's not like I'm going to act on it and fuck her. Besides, Alice doesn't flirt anymore, Tina laughs. "My, my, Bella. Someone thinks very highly of themselves." She says. I smirk. "Oh, I do." I say and look at her and we both laugh.

"Alright… you're cocky. I like cocky." She says with a grin. I grin. "That so?" I ask. She nods and I feel her leg brush against mine. I go stiff and pull my leg back "Oh, um." I clear my throat. "Yeah, I can't… do that." I say and take another bite of my food.

Tina laughs softly and the waiter comes and places a plate with pancakes in front of her. "Bon appetit." I say as I take another bite of my food. "Why, thank you." she says and takes a bite.

"So, would you tell me what it is exactly you can't do?" she asks. I look at her and smile shaking my head "Oh, I think we both know exactly what I mean, I can't do." I say. Tina smiles and brushes her leg against mine again as she takes a bite of food. "What? You can't have a conversation?" she asks innocently tilting her head to the side.

I smirk, this girl is kind of adorable "I can, but… I have a girlfriend." I say. Tina smiles "What a coincidence, so do I." she says and stretches her hand to brush against my hand. I freeze again and pull my hand back. My eyebrows scrunch up. "Really… so, where is she?" I ask looking around the diner. Tina laughs. "Back in Seattle, probably sleeping with her ex." She says. I cough a bit with my coffee.

"And you're telling a complete and utter stranger this why?" I ask with a confused smile. She shrugs. "I guess I just need to talk to someone and… you were the only person sexy enough to catch my attention." She says.

My face goes blank for a second before I compose myself. "Alright then." I say with a laugh. "I have no idea how to answer to that." I say. Tina shrugs "I don't really think there is." she says and I laugh and we eat.

"So, what arrangement do you have with your girlfriend?" she asks. I frown. "Um… the normal one." I say and Tina laughs. "Oh, monogamy. Tricky little sucker." She says winking at me. I nod and shrug. "Yeah, I guess… and you?" I ask leaning forward and flashing her a smile. She bites her lip and shrugs. "We have a very, very open relationship." She says in a seductive tone, her eyes trying to reel me in.

I nod and trail my eyes from her eyes to my plate. "That must keep things interesting." I say and Tina laughs. "Yeah, I guess so." She says. I take a sip of my coffee. "And you're perfectly ok, with that?" I say. She nods. "Yeah, we just don't see the point to be monogamous. If we want something we go after it, what is important is that at the end of the day, I still love the girl." she says.

I nod, but try to keep her words out of my mind. "Well, I know I would flip the switch if my girl would have sex with someone else." I say shaking my head. Tina laughs and eats a bit of her pancakes. "Well, would you prefer she lie and cheat on you? I know I can't help it, I feel caged if I only had to sleep with one person." She says. I laugh softly. "I get what you're saying." I mumble.

She reaches for my hand and squeezes it. "I know you're like that, I could see it from the way you hold yourself. Out of the blue you can have any girl you want, like some magical gift from the Gods? It's just who we are. You know what I'm talking about." She says and runs a finger threw the palm of my hand.

I hold back the gut clenching feeling to get up from the chair and walk with her to bathroom and… fuck, I can't do this. I clench my jaw and pull my hand away. I look at her and I see her bite her lip. "Your eyes are… hypnotizing." She says and I slide down my shades.

I clear my though "Well, it was nice to see meet you Tina. I… er, I have to go." I say. Tina smiles. "Where you going?" she asks. I smile/ grimace "My girlfriend's house, she didn't eat anything for breakfast so I was thinking about dropping something off." I say. And get away from you before I get any more riled up and end up cheating on Alice. I add in my brain.

Tina nods. "Ok, I'm going to be straight forward here and I apologize if I offend you. But, I need to know. What are the chances of me going home with you?" she asks with a lust filled voice. I stand up and click my tongue "Look… your hot and not clingy and you would be exactly the type of girl I would go for but… I have a girlfriend. Trust me, if I didn't I wouldn't hesitate but…" I trail off and Tina smiles and nods.

"Listen, its good. I just… had to ask." She says. I laugh and she shrugs and stands up "Would this forbid me from giving you my number… just in case?" she asks. I smirk. "I'm not sure.." I say with a chuckle and Tina punches my arm playfully. "Well then, I'll just… pick pocket you." she says with a wink and grabs my phone from the table and flips it open.

"And… I'll sneak my number in here… and if something ever goes wrong or… you just want to talk… you can call me?" she says and flips my phone shut. And she hands it back to me. "Just as friends of course." She says in fake seriousness, even going as far as to pout. I lick my lips, fuck…. I grin to myself.

I laugh and nod once. "It is as friends… and I can't guarantee that you will get a call from me." I say and she shrugs. "Hey, it's worth a shot." She says with a shrug and slides down her shades with a smirk. I laugh. "Sure thing." I mumble laughing. She walks away and when I look down at the table I see two twenty's.

"Thanks for breakfast." I mumble as I walk to the cash register. "Hey, yeah. Can I have a batch of blueberry house waffles to go?" I ask taping my fingers against the counter. The woman on the other side smiles and nods and I hand her a twenty ad she quickly rings me up and hands me my food.

I go to my car and slide in and drive to Alice's house. I knock twice and the door opens to show Rosalie. She stares at me for a moment and laughs, I frown. "What?" I ask. "Oh, nothing. This is going to be fun. Alice is in the living room." She says and walks me there.

I stop short at the entrance as I look at Alice and Kate an inch apart. Rosalie chuckles as she sits down "Shh, here comes the best part." She mumbles and I look from her to Alice. "I can't continue to see you with him. Can't you see that each second you pass away from me is like a stab to my heart?" Kate asks.

Alice cups Kate's face. "How I wish it was you with ever kiss and touch. Every second I spend with him I imagine you." Alice says. "Prove it to me, kiss me." Kate says and pulls Alice close to her. Alice stands on her tiptoes and Kate leans forward. Anger flashes in me and I place the paper back on the coffee table and walk over and pull her away from Alice.

"What the hell?" I ask looking between the two. Alice opens her mouth but its Kate that answers me. "Chill out, Bella. We're just rehearsing our lines." She says. I look at her and glare. "You, shut up. It looked like you were planning on kissing my girlfriend," I say and push her slightly.

She stumbles back a step and sighs, I hear Rosalie laugh but I'm to pissed off to say anything. "Bella, calm down. We were just practicing our lines for our made up scene." Alice says. I glare at her "Then why didn't you make up a death scene and kill the bitch." I say.

Rosalie laughs again and I ignore her when Kate speaks "I'm right here, you know." She says. I look at her. "I told you to shut up." I say and she lifts her hands in surrender. I look back at Alice. "We can't because our scene is supposed to me a romantic scene. The death scene was given to Tanya and Victoria." Alice says.

I run a hand threw my hair and look at Kate. And back to Alice and back. My eyes narrowed. I don't like this, I don't fucking like this at all. "Is there a kiss?" I ask. Rosalie laughs again and I glare at her. "Shut up!" I say to her. She giggles but makes a hand gesture that she's going to shut up.

"Well, it's a romantic scene. We're supposed to kiss." Kate says with a mocking grin and I walk the step over to her and grab her shirt. "You kiss her and I will fuck you up." I growl out. Alice intervenes by grabbing my arms and pulling me off her.

"Bella, calm down. It's not a big deal." She says. I laugh. "Not a big deal? You kiss someone other than me and it's not a big deal? How would you feel if I went around kissing people that weren't you?" I ask.

"It's not like that and you know it. If I had another option I would take it but it's my grade and its acting. It's not real." Alice says. I glare at her and clench my jaw. "Whatever, we will talk about this later." I say and chance a glance at Kate and look back at Alice "When is this scene thing?" I ask. "It's on Monday." She says. I nod. "I'll be there." I mumble.

I look back at Kate. "I'm not even joking. You kiss her before Monday and I will kill you." I say before hugging Alice to me. I smirk. "Besides, you wouldn't want to kiss her if you knew where her mouth was all night." I say and Rosalie explodes in to laughter and Alice pushes me away.

"Bella!" she says and I smirk and shrug. "What? I'm just saying. Kate seems so interested in my sex life I thought I would mention it." I say with a smirk and a shrug. "By the way, you left in such a rush this morning I thought I would bring you breakfast." I say and motion for the bag.

Alice nods. "Yeah, sure. Thank you, that was sweet of you. But, look Bell. Where just going to be rehearsing so… I'll call you when we're done here." She says. I smirk and kiss the top of her head. "Of course, I'll wait until Monday to see the full scene. I wouldn't want to spoil the surprise." I mutter darkly and kiss Alice.

And I mean, full blown make out as I glare at Kate from over her shoulder and close my eyes. I pull away with a breathless Alice and I smirk. "Just keep in mind who it is your dating, no?" I ask. Alice rolls her eyes but nods and I chuckle as I walk away and stop at the doorway.

"Oh, and Kate… not even in your dreams would she imagine you while being with me. Just saying." I say with a shrug as I walk out of the room and out of the house. I get in my car and drive off to my house full blast.

~~~ Monday~~~

Ok, I was wrong. This is hell. This is killing me. I'm sitting in the middle rows all alone behind the teacher. Apparently I'll have to improvise a scene later in the day. I sigh as I watch Karin and Beth who I might add is dressed like a man… and still looks pretty hot. I look around and see Alice dressed in normal clothes and looking at the scene in front of me.

"Natalie, I have told you once. I have told you a thousand times. You are not to see that man again! So help me god, I will kill the man who dares take you away. You are my wife, my woman, my property." Beth says in an angry tone. I sit back and chuckle to myself.

Karin stands from her chair, her dress dispersing around her. "It is not you, the man I love. How can thy, be so selfish? To keep me a prisoner in these walls. To never be free again! You are nothing but a devil in disguise. I have never hated a man as much as I hate you Dante." She says. Beth marches up to her and grabs her by the arms. "You will love me, and no one but me. I gave you a house when you were in the rain. I gave you food when you were starving. You owe me your life you ungrateful brat!" she yells and fakes a bitch slaps her. And with that Karin falls to the ground and Beth walks off stage.

Then they get together and bow. I chuckle and clap my hands. Shit, now I remember why I liked this class. I clap and stop when the lights dim. The teacher claps. "Very good, very good. Thank you for that incredible performance." She says. I clap behind her again. "Now, it is Alice and Kate's turn. The reunited draft of the two missed lovers." The teacher says.

The lights dim again and then zero in on Kate dressed like a dude. I chuckle to myself and lean back in my chair resting my feet on the top of the chair in front of me. "Where is she? Natalie said she would meet me at dusk." Kate ponders as she paces and checks her pocket watch.

I glare at her as I lean my head back. "Marco, your still here." I hear Alice say. My eyes shot back to the stage "Natalie, yes. I'm here but… what happened to your face?" Kate asks as she marches up to Alice and cups her cheek. I clench my jaw, _it's just a touch, it's just a touch. Alice loves you, Alice loves you, it's just a touch._ I chant in my head as my fist clenches when Kate kisses Alice's cheek.

I hear someone sit behind me but I ignore it, I'm too busy staring at the stage. "I'm fine, Marco. Dante just lost his temper, nothing I haven't seen before." Alice says. Kate sighs and holds Alice at arm's length.

"Leave him, leave him and come with me. We can leave this dreaded place and go by ourselves. You will never have to worry about a thing." Kate says. Alice sighs and cups Kate's face and rests her forehead on hers. I hold back a growl. "They are too fucking close." I mutter to myself.

I take a deep breath. _It's just acting, Bella. It's just acting. Alice doesn't mean any touch. She doesn't like Kate she loves you. She is engaged to you. Alice does not like Kate._ I chant as I close my eyes.

"I can't continue to see you with him. Can't you see that each second you pass away from me is like a stab to my heart?" Kate asks. My eyes zero in on her, she better make that kiss quick before I snap her neck.

Alice cups Kate's face. "How I wish it was you with ever kiss and touch. Every second I spend with him I imagine you." Alice vows. "Prove it to me Natalie, kiss me." Kate says and pulls Alice close to her.

Alice lifts up on her tiptoes and I think I'm going to be sick. I don't know why I'm so jealous, I've never been the jealous type. I've never really cared, but now? Why am I acting like this?...

I force myself to open my eyes that had closed and I look at the stage as Kate and Alice kiss. I feel my heart being stabbed, I feel it being ripped apart. I feel so much anger. I stay paralyzed as the kiss breaks. I feel pain run threw me when Kate pulls Alice back in to the kiss and Alice kisses her back, fuck I'm going to puke.

My hand fists in the seat and I feel my eyes itch. This shouldn't hurt me but... that kiss didn't look like a stage kiss. Alice knoted her hand in Kate's hair, a dead give away that she... enjoyed it... no, no, no. This cant be true. "Kate told me they spend the whole weekend working on the kissing scene. She said they couldn't get it right at first." I hear a girl whisper behind me. My jaw clenches as Alice pulls away and takes a step back, away from Kate. And shakes her head a bit, fuck... no. I feel my breathing hitch in that angry feeling flare threw me.

Kate grins and I don't know how, her eyes trailed over to me and she smirks. I go to stand but I hear the girls behind me whisper. "Alice told me they hadn't kissed until today, something about not wanting to upset Bella." The girl whispers. I recognize the girl's voice, Nikki and Terra. Their freshmen, don't they know I'm right in front of them? Fucking idiots.

"Wouldn't blame her for lying, have you seen Bella? She's scary as fuck. Alice would have no choice but lie about that. But Kate wouldn't lie about that, it wouldn't be worth the beating she would get from Bella if it weren't." Terra says. Nikki giggles. "True, Kate isn't a masochist. But I wonder if Alice is? I mean, who would ever want a relationship with Bella? She's so… intimidating." Nikki says.

I lower myself a bit in the chair, _this can't be… fuck, this can't be true. Alice wouldn't lie to me about this would she?... I don't know. Is she afraid of me? Is that why she would lie?... and Kate… would she make this shit up? I mean, really. It won't be worth the beating I will give her… shit, this is so fucked up. but i am breaking that bitches nose. _

I knot my hand in my hair as I try to swallow down all these emotions. Jealousy, anger, hurt, discomfort, hatred, sadness, numbness and utter rage. It would be so much easier to just go numb. The lights go bright and the teacher claps. "Wonderful, wonderful performance. It's hard to see such a good chemistry on stage, bravo." She says clapping. Kate smiles and puts an arm around Alice.

I glare at her arm, she shouldn't be touching her. "Thank you." Alice says and they both bow and get off the stage. I close my eyes and take a deep breath to calm my anger and the teacher calls Victoria and Irina.

"But didn't you hear? Supposedly Bella actually encouraged the whole thing. Said it would be hot to see Alice kiss someone else… what a fucking freak." Nikki says. I bite back my rage. "I think I saw Alice and Kate flirting before going on stage. I mean, you can't fake that type of attraction." Terra says.

Nikki giggles "Yeah, I saw them too, they were like too close. They were totally flirting." She says. I clench my eyes shut, I swear if these girls speak one more time I will fucking hit them. Thankfully they shut up for the rest of the performance. Then the teacher calls me.

"Bella, oh, Bella! It's your turn darling. You have five minutes to improvise what you're going to do." She says. I nod and stand up, I hear Nikki and Terra gasp and say 'shit' softly as I walk out of the seats and walk down to the stage. I jump on stage and nod to the teacher as I make my way over to the tech guys.

"Look, I just need to make it dark and then zoom in on me. And if I point to someone you light them up too, ok? Alright?" I say. They nod and I make my way back to the dressing racks and I shove against Kate knocking her agaisnt the wall. I smirk above her "Ill get to you latter." i growl and go to the clothes. I slide in a suite vest and cane with a top hat. I shake out my hair and sigh as I click my tongue as I keep being deep in thought.

The teacher says that its time and I walk on to the stage with a face smirk on my lips. I walk to where the light is zoomed "Some, say I'm a shadow. Others, say a dream." I say as I place the cane in front of me. I lift my head up and inch and flicker the hat up "Oh, but I'm no one's dream." I say and lift one arm my tone extra dramatic.

"Some may call me a devil. But that, it's really hard to believe." I say with a grin. "I go by many names and many faces. I can speak to you in many languages. I'm a predator… and in reality… I'm after you and you and you and oh, especially you." I say with a smirk as I point to with my cane. As the light zeroes in on Madeline. I nod for her to climb up and I walk to the side and grab a chair.

"You can call me a sinner or you can call me a saint. In reality, to me it's really all the same." I say as I pull the seat and she sits down. I stand behind her. My voice honey, velvet and smooth. Seductive really. "Now, you can try to fight me. But baby why would you try. I can make it worth your time." I say with a grin and a wink as I step to the side and grab her hand and pull her to me.

"You can tell me to dance, to cry, to sigh. But you only need to promise me one thing." I say and reach in my pocket and take out a red handkerchief. "Promise me… you'll be mine." I say and flash a grin as I tie it around her eyes. "Yes, I'm a predator. A dangerous fiend, I can't really be trusted but, ill trap you in my wicked scheme. Ill make you think i love you but, in reality... i dont feel a thing. It may be a tad evil but hey, that's just me." I say and take off the top had and bow.

I grin as I straighten up and take off the red handkerchief from Madeline's eyes. "Thank you, you were great." I say and give her a wink. Madeline smiles and walks down the steps. The teacher claps "Outstanding Bella, you outdo yourself. But I must ask, what inspired that little speech?" she asks.

I smile and shrug. "You never really know what you're going to say, I just put on the costume and… it just told me what to say." I say with a shrug. No need tot ell her, its about me. The teacher laughs and claps "You and your riddles, Bella." She says. I chuckle and walk back stage and take off my costume.

I walk back to the stage and speak to the teacher. "Look, Mrs. Crawl. I was wondering if it were possible for me to step out for a few minutes. I'll be back quickly." I say. The teacher frowns but nods. "Alright, just take this pass." She says and hands me a blue slip. I smile at her. "thank you." I say as I exit threw the back stage door. And quickly I light up a cig.

I sit on the ground and take a few drags as I let my mind go blank. I don't want to think about anything. I'm so tired of thinking and fighting and being jealous. But I can't help it, is it possible to feel this emotionally exhausted? I'm completely sick and tired of feeling. Everything used to be so much more simple when I didn't care.

Nothing would bother me because I didn't care. Shit, I kind of wish I didn't care. I close my eyes and see Alice behind my lids. Fuck, I love this girl more than I ever wanted to feel for someone. This… core crunching feeling, I've felt it my whole life. I don't want that feeling in me anymore.

I smoke my cigarette slowly as my mind goes blank. I don't want to feel, I don't want to think. Once I finish my cigarette I walk back in and hand the slip to the teacher just as the bell rings. I grab my notebook and my pen and walk to the door and lean against it with my eyes almost closed until I see Alice.

I push off the door and walk next to her locker. "Yeah, your scene was great." I agree in a monotone voice. "Yours was great too, I was wondering where you got that idea from." Alice says cheerfully. I bite my lip. "Nowhere really, I just made it up on the spot." I say as I stop at my locker and grab my leather jacket. "Really?" Alice asks.

I nod, bored. "Yeah." I say as I walk with her to her locker. I lean against the other side of her locker and close my eyes against the cool metal. My headache calming down just a notch. "You ok, Bella?" Alice asks. I nod. "Yeah, I'm just tired." I say 'tired of feeling, tired of being angry, maybe even tired of trying' I add in my mind.

"Aww, my poor baby." Alice coos as she hugs me. I stiffen for a second before feeling ridiculous and leaning in to her hug. She kisses my neck, cheek and then kisses my lips. I close my eyes as I shift us so that she is leaning against the locker. I kiss her with everything I have. And then I pull back.

"Now, don't you wish it was me kissing you in theater?" I ask with a playful smirk. Alice laughs and nods. "Yeah." She mumbles and we kiss again. I bite her lip gently and then I pull away and sigh. "Come on, let's go to lunch." I say and we walk to lunch. I sigh and once I reach the lunch room just grab a bottle of water.

"Aren't you hungry?" Alice asks. I shake my head. "I feel sick, actually." I say as I walk over to the table, leaving Alice at the line and sit down at the table. As soon as I'm seated I hear laughter, my interest is peaked and I look back to see what or who they are laughing at. No one is looking at anyone. I frown and shrug as I turn my head around only to feel a hand clap my back.

I turn around to see Chester standing behind me with a grin, Maria behind him. I sigh and stand up. "What do you want?" I ask sitting on the table. Chester grins before grabbing me by the collar of my shirt. "I have a bone to pick with you." he says. I look from him to his hands on my shirt and back.

"I will give you five fucking seconds for you to let go of me. Starting now." I say with a glare. He grins and holds me even tighter I see Jake at the corner of my eye standing up I raise a hand to him. "Four… five." I say and with a push I pry his hands away from me and push him away from me.

I straighten my leather jacket. "Now, would you care to tell me what is up with you?" I ask. "Yeah, what kind of a creep lets their girlfriend go around kissing half the school and has the nerve to watch it? You're fucking sick Swan." He says. I feel utter rage run threw my body.

"It was theater class, it was acting you idiot. It didn't mean anything to her." I say. Chester grins and Maria speaks. "Really? Because Kate is telling everyone how they made out all weekend." Maria says. Fuck, its already two people that have said that. "I doubt that." I say.

Chester snickers. "But still, how fucked up is it that you watched. Does it like, turn you on or something to watch your girlfriend kiss someone other than you?" He asks stepping closer to me. I glare at him as I feel my anger increase tenfold, "No, it sucked. Now, get out of my face." I say. Maria laughs. "Fuck, I bet she gets off on it. Little creep." Maria comments and I go to step over to her when Chester blocks me.

"Hey, now. Behave." He says. I smirk. "Aw, you can control your bitch. That's too cute." I say with a smile. Chester glares at me. " You should watch your mouth." He says. I smirk. "Really? Because I think you should watch yours, before something really bad happens to you." I say darkly.

"Remember one thing, dead beat. Money talks, and I have a lot of it. Wouldn't it be a shame if something happened to you because you didn't watch your step?" I ask. He glares and steps forward. "That a threat?" he asks. I smirk. "No, it's a smart warning." I say as I push past him and go to walk over to Alice when I hear it again.

"Dude, like all weekend…. Ha ha No, Bella has no idea, she would flip out on us… I don't know she seemed into it." the voice says and I turn my direction to the table on the corner and grab Kate by the back of the neck and throw her on the ground. I hover over her. "So, you've been talking shit? Man up and tell me to my face you little bitch." I say as a circle forms around the two of us.

Kate on her back in the floor and me hovering above her a feet away. She lifts herself to her elbows and stands up brushing off her shoulders "What are you talking about?" she asks flashing me a grin. I smirk. "Oh, I think you have a pretty good idea." I say. Kate smirks at me. "Not really, no. I was just telling them how well the scene in theater class went." She says and flashes me a smile.

I feel my blood boil and I take a step closer. "Listen to me, ok? I'm getting really tired of your little games, Kate. This is your fucking last warning, stay away from Alice. If I see you anywhere near her, I will fuck you up. You understand?" I ask. Kate smiles. "Bella, I have all my classes with her, I will have to be close to her." She says. I smirk. "Then drop a few classes, for your own safety. I would hate to see something happen to you." I say as I walk toward her and tower over her by a few inches.

I grab her shirt and give her a good tug "Stay away from my girlfriend." I say before I punch her gut and push her to the side and she falls to the ground coughing. I push past the people in the circle and walk back to my table where I grab my water bottle just as Alice comes over to me.

"Bella, what's the matter?" she asks. I glare at her. "You and me are going to have one fucking hell of a talk later." I growl out as I walk past her. She grabs my arm and I shake free from her. "What do you mean? What happened?" she asks. I glare at her. "That is exactly what I want to find out." I say.

I see Jake, Seth and Leah coming over here and I motion for them to stop. "What do you mean, 'that's exactly what you want to find out?'" she asks. I clench my jaw and place her trey on the table and escort her to the back of the lunch room and out the door to the benches.

Once we are out there I let her go and take a few steps away from her. "Alice, I want you to tell me the truth. No matter how bad it is ok?" I ask calmly, my voice right on the verge of sounding a bit demented. Alice nods and I fist a hand in my hair "Did you and Kate make out in the weekend? As a stupid excuse of a play thing." I say.

Alice looks at me blankly. "I told you that we were going to-" I cut her off. "I don't care about what you told me, I want to know what happened!" I yell at her. Alice's eyes go wide and she takes a step away from me. I take a deep breath to restrain this anger my jaw clenching so much its almost painful.

"Bella, nothing happened." She says. I close my eyes and clench my hands against the wood of the bench. "Don't, don't you dare lie to me Alice. I'm begging you to tell me the truth right now, did something happen between you and Kate this weekend?" I ask. Alice is quiet and then she speaks. "No." she says softly. My head snaps over to hers. "And why is it that I don't fucking believe you?" I ask. Alice's face scrunches up in pain "You don't believe me?" she asks. I bite my lip and glare at the floor. "I want to… but no, I don't believe you." I say looking at the door to the school.

"Bella I promise you, nothing happened. Honestly." She says. I smirk. "Did you know your best friend is spreading a rumor that you guys made out the whole weekend and that you aren't telling me because you know I would flip out." I say. Alice's head snaps to mine. "Kate wouldn't do that." She says. I laugh a bitter laugh. "Yes, yes she would." I say and with that I walk back in to the school.

"Are we good?" Alice asks. I close my eyes "I'm not sure yet." I say as she walks past me in to the cafeteria and I sit down across from her. I lean my head on the table and try to ignore the laughs and mocking gestures that I know are aimed at me.

**A/N: Uh-oh! trouble in paradise! Lol! xD REVIEW!**


	45. Chapter 45

**A/N: This chap is a bit intense but I like it. I'm not sure if you guys will but it's... it's hard to describe. It just came to life out of the blue, oh and you guys like the whole lesbian thing you guys will love a show called "The L Word." its fucking epic! I have a mega fucking crush on Shane. She's... I'm straight and even I would fuck her. That is just how hot she is. Check it out!**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**

**Ch.45**

**Bpov**

I walked back in to the school to see Kate leaning against a table. I grab her by the neck of her shirt and drag her out of the lunch room and to the parking lot. I hear the rushed words of the people fallowing us. As soon as we touch the outside I throw Kate forward and she stumbles before glaring at me. I hear Leah yell something at me but I don't care. I only have one mission at this moment and it's to fucking show Kate a lesson.

"What the fuck?" Kate asks but I don't speak, I pull my arm back and send it flying to her face. She sags to the side and I hold her by the shirt as I growl at her. "You think you could get away with kissing my girlfriend?" I ask as I knee her in the gut and she kneels on the floor.

"Did you?" I yell at her. She coughs and I pull her up by her shirt and send my fist flying back to her face. I bust her lip and drop her. I tower over her, anger clouding my mind. I can hear people yelling and cheering and chanting but I'm too far gone.

My breathing is erratic as I pull Kate up and she actually manages to push me. I smirk and slam her against one of the by stander cars. "Did you fucking think I would let you kiss Alice and get fucking away with it?" I growl out. Kate shakes her head and I nod once as I slam her against the van. I smirk down at her. "Your so fucking pathetic." I growl out sinisterly as a shudder runs through my body. Adrenaline.

"You think, for one fucking second I would let you go that easily? You really are a dumb bitch!" I say laughing as I pull my hand back and punch her in the gut and Kate spits a mouth full of blood. I laugh a real sinister laugh as I grab her collar and again throw her to the floor. I chuckle evilly as I walk to her and she actually stumbles back. I see Tanya and Irina stare in horror as I smirk at them.

"I'm really sorry about this, but... sometimes you have to teach people where their **limits **fucking are." I say and when I said limits I kicked Kate. She rolls over and I feel an arm wrap around both my arms and pin them to my body. I smirk. "Jake, let me go." I say. I hear a sigh. "You're going to kill her." he says. I shake my head and smirk. "No, not at all. I'm just teaching her a lesson." I mumble tilting my head and smiling.

"Fuck, Bella you're losing it." Leah comments as she walks over to me and cups my face. I shake my head out of her hands. "No, I'm not. I only had two Valium." I say and smirk. Jake lifts me from the ground and pulls me to the side and lets me go. I smile and lift my hands and point to Kate.

"That bitch and all of you!" I say looking around at the parking lot where everyone is staring at me fear and something like pride on there face's. "All of you need to remember where your place is. And that is under me." I say and smirk. "Kate, stupid ignorant Kate though she could actually kiss Alice and I would act like it was ok." I say and laugh. "No one, screw's me over." I say and my eyes actually travel to Alice.

"No one will get in between me and Alice." I say, I can't suppress the slight smile on my face as i walk over to her and hug her to me. "I love you, im sorry im such a jerk, you deserve better. Im sorry... i love you." i say softly to her and kiss her lips. She gives me a soft laugh and kisses me back "your crazy, but your my nut job." she mumbles and i kiss her. God this girl, i love her so much it hurts me.

I pull away and walk back tot he pack "We will need to leave." i mumble as my happy smile fades to amusement when the principal walks out and straight to me. "Bella Swan, I have had it up to hear with you!" he yells. I smirk. "Sir, if I'm not mistaken you really shouldn't yell at a donor of the school." I say flashing him a superior smirk. He falters and I smirk at him and click my tongue. "You should probably tell someone to clean all this shit up." I say motioning to where Kate is crouched on the floor with both Tanya and Irina and either side of her.

I laugh evilly, yup. The Valium is screwing me up. I smirk at the principal. "Nothing happened here, sir. And... If I'm not mistaken, you're supposed to be in your office. And you really... didn't hear anything. Right?" I ask lowly with a smirk. I see the Cullen's of the the side giving me wide eyed stares and i can actually see Alice face palming but, the principal cant know Alice is involved in this. The principal huffs and I laugh softly and walk past him. "Don't worry, _sir_. The school funds are intact." I say mockingly as I walk to my car and motion for the gang to come with me.

I chance a glance at Alice and wink before I look at the principal. "Oh, and sir. I don't think Kate has the point grade average to be in theater anymore. You know how it is." I say with a shrug as I sit in and turn the car on with a loud purr of the engine. I smirk and gun out of there.

This school, its mine. I look next to me to see Leah, Jake and Seth all smirking and I laugh. "We are fucking bad asses." I mumble and the car roars with laughter as I stop at Jake's house "Get the good shit. And the blow." I say and Jake hesitates "Its aether that, or i go back and finish the job i started on Kate." i mutter darkly and Jake nods and walks to his house.

~~~~ one week later~~~

Jake sighs "Bella, maybe you should take this a bit slow." he says. I shake my head "It's not, um no, it's just…" I trail off and my mind flashes to the past week. Bickering with Alice, Alice laughing with me, fighting with Alice. Yelling at Alice, Alice yelling at me, angry un predictable sex, the fucking rumors… it's getting to be too much to handle. Its like even with Alice, im still on edge with everything.

"No, I don't want to think of it," I say softly as I sniff up the line of blow (cocaine). I rub my nose and shake my head softly, Leah sighs. "Bell, have any Valium I can bum off?" she asks. I nod and get up. "We will mourn our leathers neutering." Seth vows. Jake laughs. "We will all die." He says. Leah laughs. "Kill the oppressor." She cheers.

I laugh as I walk through my house and go directly to the kitchen. I grab a bottle of Valium and take 2. I swallow them with a shot of vodka. I sigh and walk back to the living room throwing the pill bottle at her. "You're not seriously telling me, this stuff affects you." I say smiling at Jake.

Jake, Leah and Seth roll their eyes. "It's just; you're hitting this shit hard core Bell. I haven't seen you sniff this down I mean really, you've gone through this like candy." He says. I smirk. "It is, it's my candy." I say and grab the razor from his hands and pour a bit of powder on the glass cabinet top. I make a neat line and grab the tube from the little dish. "So, I don't think it should worry you too much." I say and sniff up the line.

I wipe my nose as I feel the familiar itch. "Besides, I was doing pretty fine these past five months with just the Valium." I say. Leah chuckles. "Yeah, and you relapsed in to blow again." she says. I shrug. "I'm not one to keep clean to long." I say and drink a shot down with Leah and Jake. I smile and pass the tube to Leah who makes a neat line. "My, My. Who would have though, Bella still sniffs like a pro." Seth says. I laugh and push him. "Of course, I do. I've just been off the hard stuff for five months. I'm still good at it, especially this week." I say and rub my hands together. "Well, Seth. It is your birthday. And you're finally not… innocent." I say and hand him the blunt I light up and took a pull.

"Just don't overdo it, and don't do this shit without us." Leah says and wipes her nose. I laugh and lean back as I feel myself float and whoosh. "Ha-ha, yeah. Only with us, ok?" I ask. Seth nods and blow's the smoke out. "To the birthday boy!" I say and pour four shots of Vodka.

We clink the glasses and drink it down. I shiver at the feeling when it goes down. "Wooo." I yell. Jake laughs and takes a sniff. "Damn, Bell. I forgot you like the rich kid drugs." He says, I smile and roll my eyes. He lines up and sniffs. "Seth, stick with weed until you get used to being high." I say and he nods. "No worries, I'm good and toasted." He says and I laugh.

"Well, what can I say? Being above the influence sucks." I say to Jake and lean back on my couch. Leah leans next to me. "I know right? Doesn't Alice like command you not to do drugs or some shit?" she asks. I shrug "What Alice doesn't know about my… habits won't kill her. Not that we talk that much." I say my smile falling to a grimace.

Seth throws a cushion at me. "Where is Alice anyway?" he asks. I shrug "Not sure, she said her and her family were having some, bonding day or some shit. I don't know. I just… we have been fighting all week, I think she needs some space from me. Dude, its sooo fucking hard to be like… sober. No drugs, no pills, no nothing. I have to be like… on my best fucking behavior with her. She deserves it, but fuuuuck." I say laughing as I line up and look at the TV for a moment as the lines of colors streak the walls, I grin.

Leah chuckles and takes a hit from the blunt. "Well, I told you not to settle down. You're not the type to be… restrained." She says. I shrug "I'm fucking engaged to her. And I love her, I just… she's a bit one minded. You know? Like, I love it about her. She's sweet but I don't think Alice has like a bad bone in her whole body. She would go ape shit if she knew half the things I did before she came along." I say snickering as I take a sniff.

I slide back in to my seat as the room goes crazy. My doorbell rings. My eyes go wide and I stand up. "Shit. Shit, shit, shit." I mumble as I pour all the Blow back in to the bowl with the blade. "Seth, cover this shit up." I say as I throw him a towel. He nods and Jake turns to hide the bong. Leah straightens up and I clear my throat and put on my sunglasses.

"Hello?" I ask. "Bella, it's me. Alice." Alice says. I look back and curse. "Be right out, I'm… I'm, covered in… mud." I say and run back to the living room. "All of you need to act normal. Its Alice." I say and laugh softly as I grab the blunt and hand it to Seth. "If she asks… its yours." I say and turn on the TV and go back to the door and open it.

"Hey, babe." I say and kiss her lips and escort her in. "Oh, hey, Bell. Um, what are you up to?" she asks. I shrug. "Hanging out with the guys." I say and giggle. Leah speaks. "I'm a fucking girl!" she yells. I laugh. "Really? I thought you had a dick." I say sarcastically as we enter the living room.

"Oh, hey guys." Alice says. We all share a look and smile "Hey, Al." they say and Alice sniffs the air. "Um… are you guys smoking?" she asks. I curse quietly and kiss the top of her head and rub my face to sober a bit, shit, I'm screwed. "Yeah, Seth, Jake and Leah are smoking. Its Seth's… initiation. He's seventeen today." I say.

Alice smiles. "Happy birth day Seth." She says hugging him. He smiles and hugs her back. "Thanks short stuff." He says. She looks at me. "And are you…?" she trails off. I scoff, "Me? Nah, I promised you I wouldn't." I say. "Sure, Bell." She says and takes off my sunglasses.

"Your high." She states. I smile. "Room high?" I ask with a lazy grin. She shakes her head "Can, I have a word with you. Just a little moment." She says. I nod "Sure." I say and the crew calls. "Oooohh," I glare and smile. "Who's in trouble!" I say making jazz hands and I flip them off as I make my way to the kitchen.

I sigh and open the fridge. "Bella." Alice says. I sigh and look at her. "Yes?" I ask. She frowns. "Bella, you promised me you would quit pot." She says. I bite my lip and sigh. "Alice, I did quit. I quit for a long time." I say and bite my lip. She glares. "One month isn't a long time." She says. I groan. "Don't make me lose my happy high, Alice. Just don't." I groan out.

"Fuck, Bella. You're really fucked up aren't you?" she asks and I lean my head against the fridge as I chuckle and put my forefinger and thumb an inch apart. "Just a little." I say and shake my head and scratch my nose. I clear my thought.

I sigh. "Alice, look. Its long for me, I've been going clean. Really, I haven't touched other stuff for five months. I've only smoked pot and I stopped a month ago. I have gone dry, it's just not as easy as it is for you." I say. She runs a hand threw her hair. "Why not? Are you addicted to them?" she asks. I sigh "Yes, yes I am. I'm a junkie, a drink pills and do blow. Ok? I'm a fucked up junkie. I like drugs, I like pills, I like drinks. I like all this shit, and I think its kinda stupid to hide who I am from you." I state looking at her.

She glares. "It is important for you to quit, Bella. This shit will kill you." she says. I laugh. "Alice, I don't know about you, but I've had my fair share of near death experiences and they haven't killed me yet. So, if drugs take my life, it's a stupid way to go but, hey. I had fun." I say chuckling. Alice glares at me. "How can you laugh about death so easily?" she asks. I raise an eyebrow. "How? Your fucking asking me how I can joke about death?" I ask.

She sighs. "I didn't mean it like that." She says. I roll my eyes and frown at my loss of happy high, shit, lately the only happy vibe I get is when I'm high and Alice just had to fuck this up for me. "Then please, tell me. How did you mean it?" I ask. I open he fridge and take out a beer of my family's brew and drink down two gulps, the itch goes away.

"Bella, I don't want to fight. We've been doing that all week, I came over here because my family came home early and I wanted to spend some time with you." she says. I sigh. "Look, Alice. I love you, but you need to let loose. I'm not telling you to do any of the shit I do, just… I know what I'm doing." I say and hand her a beer. "Join the party, laugh at our stupidness. Just... fuck, let me let loose." I say as I take a drink.

Alice looks at me, her eyes showing hurt. "Do I even know you?" she asks, her voice frail. She set the can down and I walk over to her slowly and grab her hand and put it on my lips. I kiss it and pull her to me and touch my forehead to hers. I kiss her softly and she kisses me back, i pull away "Yes, yes. You know me, I'm still the same person you love. I'm still Bella. And I still love you. I just… you deserve to know me completely. I didn't want to tell you for fear of losing you. But, I can't lie to you... I haven't changed, I just... I'm having a hard time finding what exactly it is I'm looking for... with the drugs I guess." I say softly.

She pulls her hand away from me and pushes me away from her. "But you did. You lied to me. You had all the chances in the world to tell me that you were in to all this stuff. But you tell me now? All those times you could have just told me so simply, I wouldn't have minded that much." She says, her voice a bit bitter.

I look at her. "But I'm telling you now, what's the difference. You're finding this out, you found it out eventually." I say with a shrug. I touch her shoulders. "Chill man, it's not going to kill me anytime soon." I say. She glares at me. "Bella, I can understand drinking and maybe even weed. But blow and pills? Those are fucking dangerous. You can be so stupid, I mean really cocaine?" She says.

I wince, its ok. I deserved it. "Well, it's not the first time I do it and hell... I could do a lot worse. I'm not addicted, I just... it's common for me to go on a binge when I'm... stressed. Doesn't that count for anything." I offer. Alice knots a hand in her hair and paces. "Five months… we have been together for five months and now, I know this." She states. I nod. "I quit when I met you... and I started a week go... so I don't think technically lied." I say.

Her face softens a bit. "Yeah, you did Bell. And it's good that you stopped but, you got right back into it." she says. I sigh. "I can't win. Fuck, this. I'm trying to tell you that you are more important but all you want to do is focus on drugs! And worse! You fucking made me lose my happy high, are you happy now? I'm pissed!" I say loudly but with a hint of defeat in my tone. I don't want to fight, i just want her to see my way, just a little. I just need her to give my mind a break to calm down and ditching school for a few weeks is not an option because Alice dosent want to go with me. "Don't yell at me, Bella. I'm not a fucking little kid." She says. I laugh. "You could have fooled me." I say and grab my beer and take a drink.

"Would you stop drinking and fucking talk to me?" she says. I throw the can on the floor. "What, Alice. What do you want from me? What on earth is there left of me to give you." I say lifting my arms. She inches back. "I don't like this you." she says quietly.

"I'm still me, Alice. Your acting…. God, your acting like you don't know me." I say and take a few steps away from her, im actually hurt she's treating me like this. I mean, i would get it if it was only today. But all week, she's been acting... off. And worse no matter how sweet i try to be or make up for it, it just seems to make it worse. "Because I don't! You worked super hard to hide this part of yourself." She yells at me. "You've been provoking me all week! Who wouldn't fucking need a hit of something to calm the fuck down!" I yell.

I clench my jaw. "I never hid anything from you. I didn't go out of my way to hide things from you. You simply never asked and I didn't think to bring it up. Because at the time I didn't think I would even go back to it, because I was feeling so good." I say coldly. She raises an eyebrow and scoffs. " Then what made you feel bad?" she asks and I walk away from her and ignore her question. "You're a rotten liar, Bella. I asked you once, if there were any other drugs you like other than weed. You said there weren't any." She says.

"You never asked me that. Not once did you ask me that. Maybe you have me confused with fucking Kate." I yell. She flinches back but doesn't move from in front of me. "How the hell did fucking Kate get in to this discussion." She yells back. She takes a deep breath "I dont want Kate, to come between us Bella. Ok, maybe she's not the best person out there but i doubt she's enemy number one. What did she ever do to gain your hatred like this?" she asks. I sigh and shake my head "Its... its not important." i say and look at her from under my lashes. "Its important to me, i want to know why Kate was just... brought up and why you just... why you act like this." she says shaking her head.

It must be the coke because i just got jealous all over again, i sigh and lean my head on the fridge "Why are we doing this Alice? How did a discussion of my drug habits just... suddenly turn in to a Kate argument?" i ask softly. "I think your just... jealous that i have a past with her." she says. I shake my head "Don't Alice." i warn quietly. "Its ok to feel jealous but Bell. come on." Alice says and i clench my jaw tight. My breathing starts to get heavy "Bella!" Alice asks loudly and i snap.

"Maybe if I didn't have to see her face near you all the damn time, she wouldn't make me feel this way. Maybe if you would just stay away from her, like I've asked you a hundred times. You wouldn't need to hear about it at all. Maybe I if didn't feel this never ending jealousy that evokes in me every single time it pops in my head that you and her have been together I wouldn't have to worry! If I hadn't had to stand there and watch you two fucking make out on stage maybe just fucking maybe you wouldn't have to hear this! If I didn't have to worry about being the fucking joke of the whole school because Kate kissed my girlfriend and she kissed her back! I wouldn't fucking worry! If I didn't love you so much as to feel this way this wouldn't be happening!" I yell.

"Why do I need to stay away from Kate, she's my friend. Sure she's not the nicest person to be around, but you should remember she was there when you weren't" Alice says. I glare at her. "Who's foult was that? It goes both side's Alice! i can throw this shit right back at you! Besides, how is it that you always end up defending Kate! You're with me, you're supposed to be on my side! Kate is no one's friend Alice. She's a fucking rat, a parasite. She doesn't care about anyone except destroying me. And in this case, you are in the way of that. Kate is venom! She will rot you, Alice." I say loudly, I think I lost control of my voice when the room started to spin and go a bit red.

Alice laughs. "Then what about Heidi? Why is she always around you in the hall ways." Alice yells. I raise an eyebrow. "Heidi? I haven't spoken to Heidi in weeks! I spoke to her a few weeks ago at the market where she did share some fucking good information about you." I yell.

Alice flinches and stays quiet. "What did she say?" she asks softly. I step close to Alice and grab her arms softly and shake her to look at me. "She told me, you two had something. During the time you were with Kate and during the time after Kate which you were with me." I say lowly.

"We didn't have anything." She says. I shake her. "Is it the same fucking way you didn't have anything with Kate that weekend? And exactly who didn't have anything? Me and you. Or Heidi and you." I ask. "Bella, let me go." Alice says. I glare at her. "Who didn't have something with you Alice?" I ask again my vision blacking out a bit. "Bella, your freaking me out. Please, let me go." She says. I touch her hand gently, soothingly, sure im a bit hazy but... is this really freaking her out, or is her mind distressing her? "I'll let you go when you fucking answer my questions." I say lowly and pin her to look at me, my lips a centimeter away from her. I smirk to my self, this is usually how our angry sex moments usualy start... not that they resolve much but our never ending horny-ness.

"Bella, let Alice go." Jake says. I hold Alice tighter and look in her eyes. "Fine, I'll find this shit out eventually, beautiful. And if something did happen with Kate, I'll show her better than to mess with me... with us." I say and give her a hard kiss on the cheek and let her go. Jake quickly grabs my arms and pushes me against the fridge door. "It's not cool to do that do her, do you hear me?" he yells at me as he slams me against the fridge.

I smile and lift my hands, my vision shaking with colors and black, lines appearing and suddenly I feel out of body. I laugh softly. "I didn't hurt her at all. Go check her arms." I say. Jake lets my arms go and walks over to Alice and touches her arms, there's nothing. "You are one lucky son of a bitch, Bell." He says.

I role my eyes. "I wouldn't hurt Alice, you idiot. I love her, why would I?" I ask. He ignores me and talks to Alice. "Are you ok?" he asks. She nods. "Yeah, I'm fine. I know Bella isn't in the best state of mind." She says. I sigh. "Alice, you know perfectly well that I wouldn't lay a hand on you. No matter what state of mind I where in. I'm not fucking Gina." I say bitterly and light up a cigarette.

"I know." She says quietly and I raise an eyebrow as I pass her. "Do you?" I ask around my cig as I make my way to the living room. "Your parents and siblings believe I'm the living devil, or worse that I am Gina. So, I would understand if you thought the same!" I say but they ignore me as Jake speaks. "Look, Alice. Bella is just… easy to get angry. Ignore it, go home, and spend some time with your family. Bella will call you when she's less… frazzled." Jake says to Alice.

Alice walks behind him to the living room and sits next to me, "Its fine, I can stay here a few minutes." she says and i sigh and pull her to me and we cuddle. I start murmuring apologies in her ear and she murmurs back some. I actually start to relax and enjoy the time watching that stupid movie about imitating scream... scary movie something, the movie whit the huge pot plant that smokes the black guy. Yeah...

I actually start to giggle and mumble some of the lines and Alice actually cracks up a few times with the gang and me being well, high. We offered her weed but she said she needed to stay clean tonight. I brushed it off and started placing kisses on her neck, God, i never though i would say this but... i dont want angry sex. I want to make love to Alice... its been so freaking long... ok, a week. But.. you get me.

Alice giggles and pulls away form me. "Stop... ha-ha-ha Bella!." she giggles when i start to place open mouth kisses on her neck still watching the movie. "I miss you." i mumble agasinst her neck. She shudders but groans when she looks at her watch "I'll be needed soon at home, mom is making some dinner party." She says. I snort and decide to tease her "Make sure to invite your best friend Kate." I ask in fake bitterness. Leah whacks the back of my head and I glare at her as Alice sighs once again.

"Maybe she will be there, im not sure. Mom did invite Mr. Denali to the dinner party. He's a doctor and one of dad's colleagues." She says. I drop my grin and quickly look at her with a strained smile "Your kidding right?" i ask. Alice frowns "I haven't spoken to Kate all week, Bell. Unless you count asking for a pencil. I need to speak to her eventually." she says. "No you dont... id be happy if you didn't." i mutter the last part. "Yeah, i do. There gong to my house." she says. Insecure-ness quickly flashes threw me, im nothing great, everything leave's me, im not worth anything good, Alice could do better in a heat beat. Will Alice leave me? is this the cocaine speaking?... shit, no. Damn, am i really this pathetic? "You're not going to that." I say as I pull away from her and glare at the floor. No, Alice wont leave... will she?... please, no. I cant lose Alice...

"Excuse me?" she asks miffed, shit. Alice dose not like being bossed around unless its in bed. I take a deep breath. "Please, Kate isn't to be trusted around you... unless she wouldn't mind another round." I say laughing softly remembering what Kate looked like all week until Friday. She finally looks normal again, I sigh and click my tongue. "That would be fun." I say. "Anyway, If I'm not there she will try something. You're not going, make something up. Tell them… I'm sick and you're taking care of me." I say and take another look at the TV.

"No, Bella. My mom is really looking forward to this and so is dad. Kate isn't evil, just because you hate her. Doesn't mean I need to." She says and i know she's throwing in my face the hole I dont think Heidi is in love with me bull. I sigh and I look at her. "Yeah, it does. Her sisters tormented you when you got here. You were dating her and yet, my threat kept them away. Kate doesn't care about you, for fucks sake Alice she has been talking shit all week!." I say turning in my seat and looking at Alice.

She stands from her seat and touches her forehead. "She didn't make anything up, you're crazy and she does care, she's my friend. Bella and I'm really getting tired of your jealousy. It's really getting on my nerves. At first I thought it was kind of cute, that you cared but you're getting controlling." Alice says.

"Like you're not? Alice that's bull shit. You're not spending the evening with Kate and her fucking sisters. I'm sorry, you're not going to that dinner party. I don't want to hear another fucking comment about Kate and you all fucking week." I say. Leah hits my arm. "Cool it, she's not a pet." She hisses. I flip her off and look back to Alice. "The hell I am, I'm going Bella. Whether you like it or not. I knew I shouldn't have told you about it." she says.

"You weren't going to tell me?" I ask loudly. She glares. "No, because I knew you would act like this." She says. I raise an eyebrow "I told you about fucking let lose Tina and we had a laugh about it, but you where not going to tell me about this?" i ask. Alice opens her mouth but i continue "So you would like me to find out during the week? At school with a bunch of other rumors like that you two fucked?" I ask. "Why are you acting like this! I don't get you, Bella." Alice asks. "Like what?" I ask. "Like a girl that has felt emotions for the first time in her fucking life and is just finding out what jealousy is!" She yells.

I wince and i feel my self tear up inside, i feel like... fuck, i dont even think i can breath. I feel like my eyes want to tear up but my brain is to proud to show it. I ignore that half of the comment because... both where true and the last one was the lest hurtful part of it. "I am a jealous! I'm fucking green with jealousy every single moment that bitch enters the room! Every fucking time I have to hear a comment about you and Kate. I'm getting fucking sick of it!" I yell and throw my beer bottle across the room and to the wall where it smashes.

"Damn it Bella, would you cool down for one second?" she yells at me. I wince at her tone, "Fuck, this. I'm leaving. Call me whenever you get out of this fucking mood. Bell." She says before waving at the gang and leaving.

"Alice! I'm not done talking to you!" I yell after her as I walk after her. I grab her arm and Alice surprises me by pushing me back. "I am, I'm tired of listening to you. You need to calm down and stop making a scene in front of your friends. Ok, nothing is going on with Kate. She is just a friend, and you are really starting to piss me off, Bella." She says.

I laugh. "Really? You're tired of, of me talking?" I ask. "I can't fucking get a word in when we talk! You don't even let me! All I hear is Kate this and Kate that and fucking Rose did this and the teacher said that! For fucks sake! Let me fucking talk for once!" I yell at her. She crosses her arms and glares at me. "Fine, talk. I'll listen." she says.

I huff. "Alice, it's not that I don't trust you. I just don't trust Kate. She's not what she seems please believe me, i know this shit first hand. She's a friend of no one. She would fucking sell her sister if it got her a get out of jail free card." I say softly. Alice sighs. "I don't want to fight, calm down and then call me. You're not thinking rationally." She says. "Alice..." i say my voice soft, melting. She looks at me but i can see in her eyes she's torn. I see loyalty for her "friend" kate and love for me. I actually have to admire, Alice is fucking amazing. She just sees the good in people. Hell, she sees the good in me! Devil, remember?

"Fine, go. Just don't expect me to be here every single fucking time she screw's you over." I say with a tired sigh. Alice raises an eyebrow looking amused and hurt. "What does that mean?" she asks. I shrug. "What do you want it to mean?" I ask. "I'm hoping it doesn't mean that its friend or girlfriend." She says. I lean against the door. "It doesn't have to be." I say looking at her.

"Then don't make it that." She says and I hold her hand and look in her eyes. "Why do I feel like I would lose if it came to that?" I ask a lump in my throat. Alice looks in my face for a moment before closing her eyes and pulling me in to a soft kiss. I feel her hand fall out form mine and turns on her heal and gets in Rosalie's BMW. She pulls back and drives out. I sigh and bang my head against the door. "Maldita sea!" I yell in Spanish. "Me cago en la puta madre que vuelva a parir a Kate." I curse quieter as i walk back in. Seth, Leah and Jake giggle and I glare at them as I take the blunt away from Seth and light up "Fuck off." I say as I take a deep pull.

I swear, Kate is going to get fucked up if she keeps messing with my life. I'm getting really, really tired of her games. And Kate is playing a game, she always is. Part of the reason I can't stand her. Alice, my pour good Alice. Kate has you winded up in her net and your so fucking good and loveable and see the innocent part in people that you cant see it. Shit, it makes me look like the bad guy...

**Kate pov**

What to wear, what to wear… hmmm, maybe this gold short dress? I nod to myself and take it out of my closet. I bite my lips as my phone beeps and I pick it up. Its Heidi. "Hey." I say as I walk to the closet and look for shoes. "Hey, Kate." She says. "What up?" I ask.

"Well, I spoke to Bella a week ago at the market. I had Tanya video tape it and I recorded it. A few more conversations with Bella and we have what we need. Now, we just need your part and we're set. You can have Alice and I'll have my Bella back." She says.

I smirk and play with my hair as I look in the mirror. Thank God the bruises faded away this week. So much that with makeup, you could hardly tell. "Good, don't worry. I don't think it will be too hard to get Alice by herself and especially not hard at all to get Tanya to tape something up." I say giggling. Heidi laughs softly. "You should have seen the look on Bella's face when I told her about me and Alice, she looked like I had kicked her puppy." Heidi says.

I laugh. "Dumb, bitch. She's so jealous she's practically pushing Alice in to my arms, it's our best ally at the moment. So, I'm working on being around Alice a lot and be there when she gets tired of Bella's jealous attitude. And by the way, how far did you and Alice go after me?" I ask. Heidi laughs. "I'm so, not telling you that. Bye, bye, now. I got to go to the mall and get an outfit for the week of our plan." She says.

We say our goodbyes and hang up. I bite my lip and throw the phone on the bed next to the golden dress. "Sorry, Bella. But Alice will be mine." I say in to the small tape recorder. I re wind and play _"Alice will be mine."_ Re wind "_Alice will be mine."_ Re wind _"Alice will be mine."_ I turn it off and smile.

"Yes, she will." I say and grab a tower and walk to my bathroom. I have three hours until that party and I want to get ready as soon as possible. I smirk, hell. It won't be anything new, besides we already have kissed. It won't be so hard to just slip another one in and this time have proof.

**A/N: I'm not kidding. Check out "The L Word" two words SHANE MCCUTCHEON! I swear, I am in love. *drool's* She's sexy. And don't hate me for this chap, I kinda like the whole... tortured lovers thing.**


	46. Chapter 46

_**A/N: Lol, I know I am on a role! Lots of chapters in a row right? lol Don't hate me! it's all needed.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch.46**_

_**Bpov.**_

I spent the whole night getting high with the gang. Right now I'm cleaning the living room with help from the gang. I sigh and wipe the sweat away from my brow as I stand. "Well, it was worth it." I say as I throw the cleaning supplies in a bucket and sit down on the couch. Leah sits next, then Jake, then Seth.

"Yep, it was." They say and I laugh softly and check my phone. No missed calls. I sigh and throw the phone on the coffee table. "Did I fuck up big time or just slightly?" I ask. Leah hmm's. "Slightly, if you had cheated on her or some shit then it would be big time. It was just a small fight." Leah says. I stare at her. "I accused her of cheating, so looks like I'm in the shit house." I say and Jake clicks her tongue. "You scared her, Bell. She's not used to your… angered side, especially if it's never been aimed at her." He says.

I groan. "I know, it's just Kate. Fucking Kate, I can't help it. I've never felt these emotions. I've never felt jealousy or anger like this. It's like venom, it runs through my veins killing me. It also doesn't help that Heidi told me she and Alice hooked up when Kate and her broke up and I just… I'm going crazy." I groan.

Seth speaks up. "Weren't you and Al together directly after Kate?" he asks. I shrug. "I thought we were, apparently not for her." I say. "I would have gotten an answer but, Jake stepped in." I send him a glare. He throws a pillow at me. "I heard yelling and my first priority is that you don't kill anyone." He says.

I sigh and call Alice. It rings twice and then voice message. "Baby, look. I'm sorry, ok? I'm so sorry I was so controlling. I just… I love you so fucking much, I can't think straight. I'm sorry, please. Please just call me back." I say and hang up the phone.

"Fuck." I mumble as I hold my head. Leah pats my back. "She'll come around, just let her cool off." She says. I sigh and nod. "Your right, I should just.. let her calm down." I say. "It's just… I feel like we're growing distant. And it's scaring me. I mean, after our date a week ago we almost didn't spend time together." I say.

"Monday, I was training for kick boxing. Tuesday, she had study group. Wednesday, she was mad at me because I got detention. Thursday, I had a business call. And Friday, I asked her to go out with me but she didn't feel up for it. I asked if she wanted me to come over and she said no. So I spent Friday home alone." I say.

"Then yesterday, she gets here and we have a fight and now she doesn't want to pick up the phone." I say. Seth pats my back "She'll come around." He says. I sigh and nod. "I know, I just don't like for her to be mad at me." I say. Jake laughs. "No one likes to have their loved ones mad at another." He says.

I offer him a smile and dial Alice again. It rings twice and voice mail "Shit." I say and hang up. "What's wrong?" Leah asks. "It rung twice and then went to voice mail." I say. "Uhhh." Seth says. I look at him. "What?" I ask. He rubs his hands together. "Well, if it rings twice it means she herd the phone ringing, picked it up, saw that it was you, didn't want to speak to you, send it to voice mail." He says.

I look at him. "Your joking right?" I ask. He shakes his head. "Girls used to do that to me all the time, not since I got ripped but you know." He says shrugging and I sigh. "I'm fucked, f-u-c-k- me." I say.

"Well, looks like Alice won't come around anytime soon. Want to go dirt biking?" Jake asks. They all nod and we pile up in my car and drive to jakes. Once we get there we spend a big part of the day running in the dirt tracks in the woods.

Once it's late I take off back home and take a shower. I get dressed in my pajamas and walk out drying my hair. I jump out of my skin when I see someone on my bed. I walk slowly and sigh. "Alice." I breathe in relief. Her head turns to me and she gives me a soft smile. "I rang the doorbell a few times, no one opened so I let myself in." she says.

I nod. "It's cool, what are you doing here. I thought you were mad at me." I ask softly. She sits up and looks at me. "I'm sorry, I just… I was mad and I wanted to hurt you. But, I can't. I love you." she says her voice cracking.

I quickly go over to her and hug her to me. "I'm sorry too, don't worry. Don't cry, it was just a small fight. Where ok, don't cry." I say softly as I hug her to me and kiss the top of her head. "I love you, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She says. I hug her and shush her.

I kiss her temple. "I love you too, I'm just glad you're here. I'm sorry too, I'm so sorry." I say softly. Alice twists her head and she kisses me. I kiss her back softly, we kiss for a long while. I move my hand from her back to under her shirt.

"You know what's better than anything in the whole word?" I ask against her lips. She shakes her head. "What?" she asks. I kiss her lips a few more times. "Make up sex." I say and I feel her smile against my lips but she shakes her head. "I can't, I got my visitor." She says.

I groan. "Mother nature is a pussy blocker." I say and hug her to me. I snuggle my head in her small neck. "Snuggling is great too." I say and she giggles as I lift her up on the bed and lay her down.

I spoon her from behind and flick off the lamp light. "I love you." I say softly. She snuggles in to the pillow. "I can't live without you." she says. I smile and kiss the top of her head "I don't think you'll have to worry about that." I say. I feel her shoulder shake slightly, she must be cold.

I pull her to me and wrap her in the blanket. "Good night, love." I say sleepily. "G'night." Alice says softly and my eyes drop. A silly smile on my face, as my mind drops in exhaustion.

~one week later, Friday~

_I stir awake slowly, my eyes opening. I can feel Alice behind me. Hmm, hadn't I fallen asleep behind her? I shrug and sit up on the edge of the bed. Alice stirs and I feel a warm hand on my back rubbing soothingly. She places kisses on the back of my neck. I sigh and tilt my head, letting her. _

_She scoots closer to me and slowly turns my face to look at her. My eyes are closed and slowly open. "What's a matter, Bell?" she asks. Only, it's not Alice's voice. I look to the face and it's Heidi. "What are you?" I ask groggily._

_Heidi smiles and cups my cheek "What? You look like you've seen a ghost. Silly." She says before she leans forward and captures my lips in a kiss. I kiss her back and slowly I turn us around until him hovering over her. My lips glued to hers as I push her down on the bed. "Fuck." I mumble when she starts to trail her hands down my back. Heidi laughs softly. "Fuck me." she whispers and kisses me one more time. _

I jump awake with a start. My hand in my hair, "Fuck." I mumble as I sit up and look at the side to see an empty bed. I frown and stand. "Alice." I call my voice groggy. I walk to the bathroom, empty.

I walk to the other rooms and check the whole house. Alice isn't here. "Where the hell did she go?" I ask myself. I check my watch, I only have an hour until school starts. I sigh and go to get ready.

"It's so unlike Alice to just… vanish on me like that." I mumble as I dry myself. "She always calls or leaves a letter." I muse as I start getting dressed. I sigh and put on my bra and deodorant.

I get dressed in a simple white long sleeved button up, black Jeans and my leather jacket. I straighten my hair and walk to the kitchen. I grab a bowl of cereal and eat it quietly. This house still haunts me. I sigh and finish up and wash the dish. I grab my keys and put my stuff in my bag and walk to the car.

I get in and drive off. I don't bother picking up Alice. I'm already late, she most likely is waiting for me in school. I park my car next to the Volvo and BMW. I look around the lot to see Rosalie and Emmett.

I shrug and walk over to them. "Hey, guys. Have you seen Alice?" I ask. "Hey, Bell's. And I think I saw her walking in to school with Kate." Emmett says. Rosalie elbows him in the gut. "I think Kate left her necklace or something at our place Saturday." She says. I eye them warily "O-k? And she's giving it to her a week later?..." I trail off. Rosalie shrugs. "We just found it." she says. I nod and speak. "Well, shouldn't you guys be in class already? I mean, aren't the senior classes like on the other side of campus?" I ask.

Rose and Em exchange a look and nod. "Yeah, sure. We were just looking for my jacket, in the car." She says. I nod and look at her arms, I smirk and raise an eyebrow. "Aren't you missing something?" I ask smiling.

Rosalie looks at her hands and curses. "I- I mean." She stammers and I laugh and raise my hands before searching my pocket for a cig and lighting it up. "Hey, if you guys left for a quickie I'm not judging. Just teasing." I say smiling as I take a drag.

Rose sighs. "Yeah, you got us. I tried to tell Em but he wouldn't listen." She says. I laugh to myself. "Then, go on. I'll cover for you." I say taking another drag. Rosalie frowns. "You would do that?" she asks. I role my eyes and nod as I blow the smoke out.

"Yeah, you're a friend. A close friend and almost family by Alice's part. I got your back." I say with a shrug as I take another drag. Rosalie smiles. "Thanks, Bella. We got your back, it may not seem that way but we do." She says. I roll my eyes and smile as I blow smoke and flick the ashes of my cig.

"I think it's your job not to like me." I say grinning. Emmett laughs. "We like you plenty, Bells. It's just our job to make your life hell." He says. I sigh. "Elder siblings, yay." I say sarcastically. Rosalie punches my arm playfully. "What's so bad about older siblings?" she asks.

I shrug. "Beats me, I don't even have parents." I say smiling. Rosalie's smile falters. "Shit, I didn't mean-" I cut her off. I wave my hand. "It doesn't really matter, sometimes I think its best I was an only child." I say. Em raises an eyebrow.

I smirk. "I would completely corrupt a younger version of me." I say motioning to myself. Emmett booms out a laugh. "Your right, you just barely got there." He says and I flip him off as I put out the cig and blow the last of the smoke.

"Well, I should go. I need to talk to your sister. I'll see you guys at lunch." I say and wink. "I'll cover for you." I say with a smile as I turn on my heels and walk in to the school. I walk to my locker just as the bell rings.

I put my stuff in and grab a blank notebook and pen and walk to my class. As soon as I enter the room everyone is quiet, I shrug it off and look down at myself and smirk. "Yeah, I look good today don't I?" I ask smiling.

A few people chuckle and I roll my eyes and take off my sunglasses and nod to the teacher. "Mr. B. What's up?" I ask walking to his desk. He sighs. "Bella, everything is mighty fine. And you?" he asks. I sit on the edge of his desk.

"I'm not sure, isn't all this stuff kinda repetitive. Why don't we go on a field trip? It would be a change in scene?" I offer. He sighs. "The school doesn't have the funds." He says. I laugh. "The school doesn't, but I do. Come on, I can afford to take us out every day for a year and still have money in my bank." I say.

Mr. Banner sighs abut shakes his head. "It's not permitted to take things from students." He says. I smile. "Then does that mean I get my rubix cube back?" I ask. He chuckles and reaches in his desk and pulls out my rubix cube.

I take it from his hands and nod. "Thank you, sir." I say and walk to my desk. Alice is already seated. I kiss her cheek and then her lips. "Hey babe." I say as I sit on the chair still playing with the rubix cube.

"Hey." Alice says. I lift an eyebrow. "Why weren't you in bed this morning? I kinda had a heart attack when I couldn't find you." I say lowly as Mr. B starts droning on about molecular structure. "I had to sneak back in at my house. My parents didn't know I left and I didn't have any pads at your place and you don't have any..." She trails off and I hold back a wince. "I get it." I say lowly.

"But you can wake me up next time. I'll drive you to your house or something." I say. Alice laughs softly and shakes her head. "I was fine." She says. I shrug. "I just don't like the idea of you walking alone at night time. Promise me next time you will wake me up." I say.

Alice sighs and gives me a soft smile. "I promise, next time I will wake you up." She says. I nod and kiss her cheek and put an arm around her seat. "Good, because I worry about you." I say quietly.

I slide my sunglasses down and close my eyes. "I worry about you, more than I worry about my own life." I say quietly. "Hmm? Did you say something?" she asks. I shake my head. "No, not a thing." I say and offer her a small smile.

Once she looks back at the teacher my smile falls. That dream, scared the crap out of me. That much, I know. I don't pay attention in class. I don't do anything but look out the window with my arm around Alice's chair.

The teacher doesn't call on me, today. I ignored the class and when it was time to switch I grabbed her book bag for her and walk. "Bella, are you mad at me or something?" Alice asks. I frown and look at the book bag "Nope, I'm just wondering why you didn't even call me or leave me a note that you left." I say.

"I had to leave in a hurry it was around five am. Dad was bound to wake up and open my door to find my bed empty. The plan is to make my parents like you, not make them hate you if you remember correctly." she snaps. I nod once. "Alright, gosh, I'm sorry. I'm not a kid." I say softly and fallow behind her.

My eye catches Kate across the hall and she smirks at me when I pass. "Hey, Alice." She says. I clench my jaw. "Hey, Kate." She says dismissingly. I smirk "Bitch." I say. "Whore." She says. I smirk. "Its player, get the details straight. A whore is what your sister is." I snap.

"Don't you-" Kate starts but is cut off my Alice. "Bella, behave." She says. I raise an eyebrow and glare at Kate's smug look. "Alright, tell your sister I say hi." I say and smirk when her face falls. Alice elbows me. "Bella, grow the fuck up." She says.

My face goes blank and anger blow's through me. I grab her book bag and hand it to her. "You know, I get that you're in a bad mood. But don't take it out on me. Call me whenever this shit passes. Fuck, have Kate walk you to your class for all I care." I say and slide my sunglasses down.

I walk to Kate and tower over her I make a move and she flinches and I laugh. "Now that, never gets old." I say lowly as I push past her to my next class. People clear a path for me and I smirk to myself. I take a detour and light up at the parking lot.

I sigh out the smoke. "What is up with me?" I groan. "Grow up, I don't need to fucking grow up." I say my jaw clenching in anger. "I was forced to grow up, I really didn't have a choice." I say and the urge to hit something is too much. I punch the brick wall. "Hitting walls now?" a voice says form behind me.

I turn to see Heidi leaning against the wall. I nod "Heidi." I say and take a drag. "Hey, Bell. What's with the wall punching? Did you need to teach it a lesson?" she asks smiling. I smile to myself. "Yeah, stupid walls. And no, I'm just… mad." I sigh. "At?" she asks. I roll my eyes not that she can see. "The world." I state. She laughs. "Why?" she asks.

"Do I need to have a reason to hate the world?" I ask. She nods. "Yup, the world is mostly innocent. Its people that corrupt it." she says. I sigh and take a drag. "Nah, the world is plenty evil. People just don't want to see it." I say. Heidi nods. "maybe, but there must have been something that caused your fury at the world." She says.

"Nothing, I just had a spat with Alice." I say. She laughs. "Last time I remember, you don't have spats. You either have a fight, or you walk away. So, which did you do?" she asks. I bite my lip "Both." I say.

She laughs. "Oh, Bell. You're something else." She says. I raise an eyebrow. "I hope that's a good thing." I say. She nods. "Oh, it is. It is." she says. I laugh and lean against the wall. "Kate is getting on my nerves." I say.

Heidi laughs. "Isn't that her job?" she asks. I shake my head. "Her job is to go kill herself." I say. Heidi laughs again. "Then she's not that bad at it." she says. I raise an eyebrow. "No? how so?" I ask. She smiles "She makes you beat her up almost every other day. Sure it's a slow and painful death but I'm sure that if she gets you angry enough it would do the trick." She says.

I snort and take another drag. "Yeah, probably." I state. Heidi laughs and takes my cig from my hand. "You really should quit smoking." She says. I groan. "No, not you too. Just please, shut up." I say and take the cig form her hands.

"What do you mean, not me too? Someone else upset with your habits?" she asks. I nod. "Alice, we've been bickering nonstop for the past week, I don't know what's going on." I say. "Oh." Heidi says. I take the last drag and put out the cig. "Yup, she wants me to quit a lot of things." I say.

Heidi lifts an eyebrow. "She wants you to go monogamous?" she asks. I laugh. "I already am." I say. She chuckles. "Wow, Bella without women, I'm sorry but that's hard to believe." She says. I shrug. "I did. I am. No girls, except for Alice. I like it… its new. I love her… but, sometimes I think she's just with me because I'm something she can fix." I say.

Heidi nods. "Girls love to fix things." She says. I sigh. "Yup, but… I'm not for fixing. I'm not some toy… I'm a person. You can't fix people." I say softly. Heidi cups my cheek. "Yes, you can. You just need to want to fix yourself first." She says. I hold Heidi's wrist and pull it off my face.

"You know, I don't like touching." I say to her as I place the hand next to her body. She smiles. "You love touching." She says. I smirk but step away from her. "I love, Alice's touches. There's a big difference." I say.

Heidi smirks. "Bella, you're a sexual being. Humans are sexual beings. You can't just expect them to stop being one because they think they're in love. You are like me in a way. You crave sex and no emotions. You have the sex part down pat, but… you slipped in the emotion part. Much like me. Now, it's up to yourself to grab those emotions and lock them up." She says.

I laugh. "Heidi, please. When's the last time you felt a thing." I say. She smirks. "Just a second ago when you touched me." she says. I role my eyes "Sure, Heidi. Go burn in hell." I say smiling as I stand and walk to the door.

"Bella." She says. I stop and look over my shoulder. "Yeah?" I ask. "You and me are the same, you can't expect people to cage us. You're a free creature, people like Alice. They are like a poison for us. They will kill us slowly and painfully, its better you get out while you can." She says.

I bite my lip. "I'll stick with Alice, I don't think she's poison. She's… she's different." I say. Heidi laughs. "Sure, Bell. Just remember, I'll be here for you when you think no one is." she says. I shake my head and walk back in to the school.

Heidi is going crazy. But…. Fuck, Tina said the same thing practically. I chuckle to myself as I make my way to class to see Alice sitting in her usual seat. I sit next to her but don't even look up, I doodle during the hole class. Once this class is over I stand and wait for Alice at the door. "I though you wanted me to call you when I got over this and Kate to walk me." She says bitterly.

We have been like this all week, we bicker and yell and fight. I don't know what's happening but it's getting tiresome. We can barely be in a room together without fighting. I know that's part of the reason I can't go long without my pills. They're helping me get through these past two weeks. I just hope we get over this rocky side soon.

I walk behind her and grab her notebook. "You should get over your mood. I just don't want Kate anywhere near you." I say to her as I walk silently next to her. My sunglasses still in place, my mind blank. I don't know what to say to her. I don't even want to speak to her.

Suddenly Edward appears in front of us and I stop. "Alice, I need a word with you… now." He says. I smile, he is so gay. "Excuse me." Alice says as she walks to a corner and starts speaking with Edward. I sigh and lean against the locker. My mind is annoying me. I search my pocket and find my pill bottle. My anti-depressant pill and pour three Valium.

I swallow it and pour all the pills back and stuff it in my pocket. "Edward don't you dare!" I hear Alice yell. I look up to see him a few steps away from her. "It's not right, I will tell on you. It's not fair to anyone." he says before marching away. I see Alice ball up her fists against her eyes.

I walk quickly over to her and hug her. "Shh, its ok. Let me guess, he found out you sneak to my house?" I ask. Alice sobs in to my neck. I rub her back soothingly. "Shh, its ok. We just… we need to give them a breather. Like, go home with them all week. And we will speak on the phone or something. Just let them breathe." I say softly kissing the top of her head.

"This is so fucked up." She cries. I hold her tightly. "I know, but it's for the best." I mumble. She shakes her head against my neck. "No its not." She says. I shush her and kiss the top of her head. "We'll be alright." I promise. "We will be alright." I sooth as I hug her to me.

After a few minutes she calms down enough I pull away. "How did he find out?" I ask. She wipes her tears away "He came to speak to me… last night and… and he didn't see me. He just assumed…" she says. I nod. "Well, Eddie is smart. Its ok, do you want me to speak to him?" I ask.

"No! I'll handle this, don't speak to him. It might just make this worse." She says. I nod twice, confused. "Alright, now. Let's get you to class." I say and we walk to the classroom. "Sorry sir, I needed a word with Mr. Banner." I say as I enter the classroom.

"Doesn't matter, just take a seat." He says and I sit down, Alice next to me. Next to Kate. I sigh and hand Alice her book bag. I take out my rubix cube and start to play with it. I giggle to myself as the Valium kicks in and the colors mix and float and I feel floaty.

I have a silly smile on my lips but I like it. The rest of the morning classes pass in a blur and soon enough its lunch. I don't eat, I go to the table and start playing with my rubix cube. "Bella… eat something." Jake says. I look up and smile. "Nah, this is fun." I say. He frowns "Bella, your starting at your rubix cube like it holds the answers to… oh, oohh! No, you need to eat something." He says and lifts me by the arm and Seth and Leah go with us.  
"The fuck, Bell. In school? What did you drink?" he asks. I smile. "Valium." I say and Leah's eyes shine. "Oh, I want some." She says. I nod for them to come closer and I pour some valium in their hands. Seth, Leah and Jake down it quickly and I smile.

"This is going to be fun." I say and grab a football from the table. "Sorry, hun. You mind if I use this?" I ask the freshmen. He shakes his head and I smile. "Jake go long." I say and throw the football. Jake dashes and much to my amusement smashes in to a table but grabs the ball.

I laugh along with the school. I grab a trey and pile some stupid food on it and walk to the table snickering. "What the hell?" Rosalie asks smiling. I smile. "He just got some Valiums." I say as if it was values. Leah, Seth snicker as Jake makes his way back.

He sits next to me and glares. "That wasn't funny." He says. I laugh "Yeah, it was." I say. He nods and starts eating my food. We share my lunch and then the table goes outside for a smoke. Rosalie, Emmett, Jazz and Edward smoke with us, Alice just huffs at me.

I sigh. "What is it Alice?" I ask rolling my eyes. "You need to quit, smoking. Your going to die of lung cancer." She says and I flinch. "Dude, that was uncalled for." Jacob says to Alice. Her face suddenly clears and she curses. "Shit, Bella I didn't mean." She says but I glare at her.

"Yes, yes you did. You meant every fucking word. You just love to nudge me, hurt me quietly 'innocently' with stupid comments you know will rile me up. You've been doing it for the past two weeks! You know, Alice. I'm trying to fucking get what the hell is wrong with us. I'm trying so hard to see if it's something I'm doing that causes you to be like this with me. Because suddenly I am fucking enemy number one. I don't care if you're on your period, or if your just in a fucking bad mood. I'm getting really tired of your shit. That was uncalled for and lately I'm the one that has to remind you that I'm not fucking made of stone." I say loudly to her.

She flinches at my tone and Rosalie steps in. "Hey, don't yell at my sister like that." She says and I grab my sunglasses and launch them at the wall and they smash to pieces. "I can yell at whoever I fucking want to." I say to her.

I look back at Alice, "I'm leaving for a business trip tonight. I'll be back in one week, maybe that will give you some time to cool your jets. Because I'm really getting tired of this bullshit. And if I fucking die from lung cancer, then at least I will die like my father." I tell her lowly as I grab my jacket and walk back in to the school slamming the door behind me.

I go to the principal's office and make up some lie about my guardian being ill and me having to leave. He eats it up and I sign a check and walk out only to see Alice leaning against my car. I sigh loudly as I make my way to my car. Cant she leave me alone for one second?

"Bella, please! I'm sorry, I spoke without thinking. Please, just listen to me." she says and I walk around the car and open the door. I throw my book bag and jacket in there and turn to face her. "No. I'm tired of listening to you. I'm tired of listening to people. All I do as of late is listen while you yell at me. I haven't done a thing wrong, so what I use drugs Alice. You're not a fucking angel." I yell at her. "what is your problem?" she asks.

I laugh bitterly. "MY problem? You just want to make me angry! You want me to fight with you! You keep fucking provoking me!" I yell at her. "How the hell am I provoking you?" she asks. I clench my fist and look in her eyes. "So all the jabs you make at me are innocent? Every single moment we are together it's like a silent battle to see who can hurt the most and I'm on that receiving end!" I say and Alice ducks her head.

"Please, Bella. Lower your voice." Alice says. I laugh bitterly. "Alice, it all starts to add up after a while baby. You keep provoking me, Kate is getting on my fucking nerves. The rumors about you and her are fucking driving me crazy and Heidi is playing some fucked up imaginary power trip mind game. To top it all off your family is really starting to piss me off and really… I'm just not sure it's even worth it anymore!" I say and I see Alice flinch back.

She takes a step back from my verbal blow. "I know, I'm sorry. I'm just getting stress, its fucking me up really badly. As for Kate and Heidi I have no idea and my family… they're coming around." She tries to explain.

"When Alice? It's been six fucking months! Get over it. They're not going to like me anytime soon! We can try and act like saints, we can be the perfect fucking couple but there still not going to like me! I give up! I'm sorry but I'm giving up! I can't keep trying to be someone I'm not!" I say.

"And who are you, Bella? Because obviously I only know half of the true you." Alice says. I walk over to her and pin her against the car. "I'm a screw up. Ok? I fuck shit up. I drink, I curse, I like getting high, I fucking love getting high. I'm a horny, junkie, fuck up with a lot of money. That is what I am." I growl out.

"Then it's great to know all of this when we are engaged." She shoots back. "Fuck, Alice if you don't want to marry me then give me back the fucking ring and we can call the hole shit off! We can call everything fucking off!" I yell.

She pinches the bridge of her nose and takes a deep breath as she takes a few steps away from me. "I'm sorry, ok? I don't mean to be mad at you. I'm just infuriated at the whole situation. I hate that were fighting and I hate that my family is the primary cause to it. I'm just frustrated and angry and I don't know what to do. And I'm also finding out this other part of a person I thought I knew so well… it's just scary. I'm scared and confused." She says.

"Why? I haven't changed at all! The only thing that has changed is that you just seem to want to fight…" I sigh. "I'm scared and angry Bella, I'm confused. And I'm just mad!" she says.

"Then don't take it out on me." I repeat. "I'm not your punching bag, the same way you're not mine. I'm angry, I've been angry my whole life. When have I ever taken it out on you? Never. But the last weeks you've been jabbing at me. Saying things that you know will hurt me but I just want to know why?" I ask.

Alice sniffles. "Bella, I'm just… I don't know why… I don't know what's wrong with me." she says. I bite my lip and sigh deeply. "Then I'm going to give you time to figure it out. I'm leaving tonight for a week. Maybe it will give you time to search yourself a bit and see what it is you want. And if I'm still in that equation. Because I honestly don't know what the fuck to do." I say lowly. Her head snaps up. "Your breaking up with me?" she asks, tears almost instant in her eyes.

I shake my head. "No, I'm not. But I also know that you're having a hard time deciding what it is you want. Just… take time and find out if I'm still part of that. I won't be mad if I'm not, don't worry. Just… do what's best for you." I say. Each word I spoke is like acid to my heart.

It burns. She looks in my eyes. "I love you, I love you and only you." she says and kisses my lips. I pull away from her and look in her eyes, a lump forming in my though. "Who are you trying to convince of that? Me or yourself?" I ask. She opens her mouth but nothing comes out.

I kiss her lips once more and I feel like my heart is breaking. I kiss her for a long moment and hug her hiding my head in her neck as I hug her. I take a deep breath, I need to be strong for her but shit, I don't even know what I want. After I'm composed I pull away and cup her cheek "I love you." I say softly and kiss her forehead.

"Bye." I say and get in my car. Alice is paralyzed there. She doesn't move, I look at her through the windshield but suddenly she surprises me by getting in to the car. "Take me to your house." She says.

I frown but don't ask questions. I drive to my house and once I get inside Alice pins me against the door.

_**~angry sex scene, skip to next bold line if you don't like~**_

She kisses me painfully hard. I knot my hand in her hair and she knots her hand in my shirt and turn us around and pin her against the door. I feel her hand fisted in my hair tug and her nails scratch at the back of my neck.

A wave of pleasure runs threw me as I push her against the door with a thud. Alice moans into my mouth as I pin her with my body. She punches my arm and I pull her closer to me and I walk with her to my room. I throw her on the bed and take off my shirt.

My anger flashing threw me, Alice kicks off her shoes and takes off her shirt as I climb on the sofa and kiss her pushing her head down against the cushions. "Fuck you." I growl when she drags her nails across my back, a shudder running threw my body.

She pushes me back and I sit up as she sits up and unbuttons my pants as my breathing goes deep. She looks at me in the eyes. "Fuck you." She growls and I knot a hand in her hair as I pull her to me and bring her over me.

She straddles my lap and thrusts hard against me. I moan in to her mouth as I drag my nails across her bag and tub at her bra. "Hard." She says against my lips. I frown. "I don't want to hurt you." I say against hers.

She claws at my back, "Do." She says and she brings my hand to her breast and squeezes and she breaks the kiss to moan. I slip my hand and break her bra. I throw it to the floor as Alice claws at mine and takes it off. I sit up and un do her jeans and pull them off in one strong tug.

Her core is right in front of the crotch of my jeans. She grinds on me and my head tilts back at the pleasure and I feel her lips against my breast. She runs her nails from my neck, in between my breasts and to my abs. I groan as I pin her hands and kiss her lips, she sucks painfully almost and bites down, I curse. "Fuck, oh fuck." I curse as I pull her head away and kiss her lips. I bite her lip as I pull away.

Her eyes shine hazel with anger and passion. I undo my pants and pull them off and pull her to me. I push her on the bed and straddle her waist as I grind my underwear with hers. She reaches down and rips my underwear. I smirk and trail kisses down her body until I'm right in front of her crotch and I rip hers off her body.

I lick her hard and she's so wet. I moan as I lick again and again. But too soon she knots a hand in my hair and tugs me up. I follow and she pushes me back against the bed and starts to kiss and bite her way down my body.

Once she reaches in between my legs she nibbles against my clit and I arch my back and thrust against her lips. She licks, kisses and nibbles but soon it's too much of a hassle. I want to hear her scream. I pull away from her and slide of the bed and grab the strap on.

I put it on and lube the stupid dildo before going to the bed and hovering over her I look at her "Do you want me?" I ask my voice thick with lust. She nods "Fuck, yes." She says and her eyes close.

I smack her clit and her eyes open. "Look at me." I say and she closes her eyes when I smack her pussy. "Fuck." She moans and I line the dildo up with her entrance. I flip the switch, turning on the vibration and my clit screams in pleasure. I line up and push in to her.

She cries in pleasure. "Oh, fuck. Oh, fuuuuuck, ohh, ugh." She says as I start to thrust against her. She takes all of it and I pull back and slam back in to her. I grunt when the vibration hits my clit once I'm in deep.

"Fuck, Bella…." She moans and I keep going. I part her thighs even more and wrap my arms against her and keep pulling her to me. I bite her neck and she claws at my shoulders. I shift so that I'm kneeling on the bed slamming in to her, my hand slides to her knee and I pull her thighs apart even more and look at her.

So willing, so hot, so… "Fuck." I moan out as I slam back in to her. She arches for me and I keep thrusting in to her. Sweat trickling down my back and accumulating on her brow. Her mouth open in pleasurable gasps of air.

My moans muffled by her neck as I kiss and bite. I trail down to her breasts and suck wile I thrust against her. Soon she just cums and screams my name in orgasm. I thrust in to her twice more as the vibration causes me to orgasm as well.

After it washes over me I roll off of Alice and turn of the dildo. I slide the strap on off me and throw it on the ground as I lay down on the bed panting.

_**~end sex scene, safe to read~**_

I catch my breath before standing from the bed and walking to the bathroom. I turn on the shower and get in. I take a quick shower and I realize that… she was trying to convince herself, during sex… she was trying to see if she still felt something. Something cold runs through my stomach as I get out and get dressed in a grew button up long sleeved shirt and black pants. I put my hair in a bun and walk back to the room to see Alice asleep on the bed.

I check my watch, I should get going soon. I grab a suitcase from the closet and fill it with clothes. Alice wakes up after a few minutes and gets dressed and helps me pack. "Where are you going again?" she asks.

"Verona, Italy. I need to check some things down at the office and where opening a new vineyard for the wine so I need to check that out." I say in a monotone as I pack some clothes. "Oh, ok. Will you call me when you get there?" she asks. I look at her. "Do you want me to call you?" I ask, holding back the pain that rushes threw me.

She bites her lip. "I always want you to call me." she says. I nod, I wonder if that's a lie… "Then, I will call you." I say and pack a few boxes of cigarettes. I walk over to the medicine cabinet and grab four pill bottles and place them in the bag. I put my hair products in it and sigh as I close the bag up.

Ii place it on the floor. "You can stay here for as long as you want, tell your parents your house sitting." I say. Alice smiles. "I may take you up on that." She says. I laugh and stop in my dad's study. I walk in and grab a brief case from there and put my lap top and some paper work inside it. I walk to the safe and grab the letter and look at it for a long moment before placing it back in the safe. I close the safe up and put some documents on the brief case. I lock it and turn off the lights.

I walk out and Alice is sitting on the piano bench looking out the window. "Don't you get scared being on planes all the time?" she asks. I shrug. "You get used to it." I say and walk down the stairs. I grab my phone and call a cab.

"Well, the cab will be here in twenty." I say and walk to the kitchen. I make me and Alice a sandwich and we eat in awkward silence and I pack my charger and stuff in the bag. We eat in silence and soon enough there's a honk outside.

I sigh and stand from the table and walk over to the living room, Alice behind me. The sky outside is a deep grey, almost black. "be careful, please." I say to her as I grab my stuff and open he door. The cab driver gets out and grab my suite case for me.

Alice nods. "I will, you be careful." She says. I smile and lean forward and kiss her lips softly, tenderly/ "I love you, so much." I sigh. Alice hugs me. "I love you too, more than anything." She says. "I still don't know who your trying to convince, baby." I say. She bites her lip "Im not trying to convince anyone, I know what I feel and what I feel for you is love." she says and i swear, i think my heart melted.

I kiss her tenderly. "I hope that you found what you were looking for when you slept with me." I add. I couldn't leave without telling her that I knew what she was doing. I knew she was trying to prove something. She surprises me by smirking "Baby, remember that I have always told you?" she asks.

"Um, sleep with someone else and i will cut off your boobs." I say quietly and she erupts in to laughter. I don't find it funny, but she has said that do me a few times so... I like my booms. I keep my hands to my self. "Yes, and what else?" she asks.

I think for a moment "That if I let my head grow any bigger I will be the main cause for the lack of air on earth." i say and she chuckles and nods "And...?" she asks and i groan, damn it! "If I even try to flirt with some girl in front of you by accident you still have the right to embarrass me publicly." I say and she grins. "God, i love that you can remember all these things. But I meant the one where I say, your assumptions suck." she says.

I role my eyes "When it comes to sex, my assumptions are always right and you were proving something. Maybe you were just trying to tell me that im just that great in bed, im not sure. But you wanted to prove something." I say with a shrug.

I nod and hand her the spare keys. "Watch my house." I say and she stares at me with a blank face. "Sure thing." She says her voice a bit chocked up. I smile to my self and hug her to me kissing her tenderly, after a moment I break apart and with a nod I walk down the steps and in the cab. My heart is throbbing. Is this what goodbye feels like? Or is this what it feels like when you say goodbye to someone you love?

It's strange, I shouldn't be feeling like this. I will see Alice in one week. Five to seven days. I wave at her as the car drives out. My heart thuds as I reach in my pocket for my plane ticket. I look out the window and sigh "Where to ma'am?" he asks.

"Port Angeles airport." I say. He nods twice and we drive through town. I sigh and lean my head against the glass, something doesn't feel right. I actually think this is the end of me and Alice… this really sucks.

_**A/N: yei, chapter! Yei, less drama! ish... kinda. **_


	47. Chapter 47

_**A/N: Dum, dum, dum! Bang!... Lol. Well, a new chapter? Yei! Heart breaking.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch.47**_

_**Bpov**_

**Italy, Saturday, **

I walk out of the plane with my head throbbing. I probably shouldn't have stopped to drink at a bar on New York… Or drink that whole bottle of wine with the flight attendant. I don't think it helped much that I haven't had a decent rest two flights in a row. First flight 4 hours of sitting on a plane, next I sit in a plane for 8 hours. I scratch my neck and walk to luggage to see a man holding a sign with my name on it. My luggage is already at his side.

I look at him from under my sunglasses(I bought new ones in NY). "Che sarei io." I say pointing to him. He tilts his head and I sigh. "Che sarei io" I repeat. The man lifts an eyebrow but nods.

I role my eyes. "Leiparla inglesea tutti?" he nods twice. "Good, now. That would be me, Bella Swan Volturi and I don't have time to waste, grab my bag and let's go." I say to him as I motion for him to walk, what? I'm in a bad mood and have a hangover. "Yes, ma'am." He speaks with a thick accent.

I stop at a Starbucks in the airport and get a large coffee. My hang over is killing me. I follow after the man and nod to him when he opens the limo's doors for me. I settle in and quickly the door closes. I lean my head back and fish my iPod from my pocket.

I connect it to the limo's stereo and slide up the window connecting the driver side with mine. I play the music and dig in my briefcase for my Valium. I take four and search the back for a bit of scotch witch it does not disappoint. I swallow it down and pour some scotch in my coffee.

I snicker to myself and lean my head back on the limo as I feel myself drift. My life has never been in my hands. I have always just rolled with the punches, so why is it that this time, I'm being killed. Who cares? The valium is doing its job and I can already feel the heat in my chest caused by the scotch. I take a drink of my coffee.

My heart gives an involuntary squeeze of pain as I think of Alice. What is wrong with us?... Is it that maybe the stressed caused by her family is finally catching up to us? I know that I've always been jealous of people staring at Alice.

I don't want anyone with her, except me. And maybe that's a big flaw on my part but, I've never had such a bad reaction to Kate until the past weeks. Why is it that, even though Alice tells me that nothing happened… I just don't believe her? Could it be the way she and Kate exchange glances in the halls? The way I always find them talking when I enter the school and Alice doesn't ride with me. Is it that, finally, I let my jealousy get the best of me? My easygoing façade finally cracked. I had always even found it fun to have what everyone else has always wanted. Is it maybe that the stress caused by my work and Alice's family not liking me, finally made me crack?

Am I finally being weighted down by the pressure of a relationship because before this moment I had never really had a relationship I would fight so hard to keep? It's so hard to worry about your feelings and then someone else's. To make sure that no one else is hurt but you… fuck, I don't think I have ever wanted this… but I still want Alice. Maybe it's just mentally? Maybe I'm just scared of committing to her for so long?... These were all good questions. And hopefully… I'll have the answer to most of them soon. Maybe Alice just needs breathing space form me.

You know? Like when you read a book. At first you go really hard core but after you reach the final chapters you start to lose patience with the characters and end up slamming the book closed a few times.

A relationship is new to me, I've never really had one. That bitch in Phoenix didn't count, we cheated on each other more then we actually talked or fucked. But Alice has, she had Gina. That evil bitch that treated my angel like shit. Who could ever hit Alice?... I was so infuriated when Alice told me that Gina had actually laid a hand on her…

Yeah, but what I did wasn't violent. I never hit Alice, I held her arms softly. Not a cage, just to make her look in my direction. I didn't give her a violent shake, just soft ones to make her listen. I would never raise my hand and hit her. The idea of it makes me sick... shit or is it the hang over. I lower the window down and vomit. Half my body dangling out the window as the driver pulls over and I puke my guts out.

I almost fall face forward on the dirt had the driver not walked out and grabbed my shoulders. He pushes me back in the car gently and then lays me down on the seat. "You alright ma'am?" he asks. I nod "Yeah, I'm good." I mumble.

He snorts. "No wonder you vomited, that scotch is old." He comments. I chuckle. "Now you tell me, Serge." I say. He smiles but shakes his head. "Stop at a shop nearby. I need some decent food." I say. He nods and I lean back against my seat.

I dig in my pocket and pop a piece of gum. I lay down on the seat and after twenty minutes Serge stops and I get out. I eat a small calzone and stop at the shop next door and buy some vodka. Thank God I had bought a face ID from some kid a few months back. Not that the guy even bothered checking for it. I get in and he closes the door and drives off.

It goes down like lead, but the results are so much better. I continue the rest of the ride drinking and smoking cigarettes. Once I reach my villa looking over the vineyard I'm good and drunk. Jenks opens the door for me and I smile at him. "Hey, uncle Jenks!" I say and he sighs and pulls me out of the car.

He places one of my arms behind his neck and holds me steady with the other. "You really outdo yourself, Bella." He says and turns to Serge. "You do know she's a minor right?" he asks. Serge opens his mouth but I speak. "He didn't buy that for me, I bought it next to some pizza place in the village." I say.

Jenks sighs and holds me up when I slouch. "Alright, alright. I shouldn't be surprised. Nothing could keep your father from a drink and I think he passed that on to you." he says. I laugh drunkenly as I walk in with Jenks to the house.

I plop down on the living room and take the bottle from my jacket pocket. I twist the cap and take a drink from it. "Bella." Jenks sighs and I look at the bottle in my hands. "I think I may lose her." I say softly. "Who? The bottle?" he asks.

I chuckle and shake my head as I take another drink from the bottle. "Alice, Jenks. I think I'll lose her." I say twisting the bottle in my hands. He sighs and motions for his maids to grab my things from the car as he sits down next to me and pats my back.

"Why do you think that?" he asks. I sigh loudly. "We're fighting… all the time…. We're not speaking… We almost never say I love you anymore… I fear… I fear that I may lose her to my fear of her leaving." I say. Jenks sighs. "I don't know, Alice seems… like a lovely young lady. I don't think a few fights may take her out of the field." He says.

I bite my lip. "She is, she is a lovely young lady. I love her with everything I have left to give but… I don't think that's enough. Uncle, she deserves someone who is not afraid to get hurt by loving her. And I…. I'm terrified." I admit.

I swallow the lump in my though with another drink form the bottle. "Bella, let me tell you a story." He says and leans back in the seat and takes the bottle form my hands and takes a drink.

"When I was a young lad, much like your age. I fell in love with this woman, she was beautiful. Breathtaking, smart, adventurous." He sighs. I nod. "Well, one night we're at this ball, and she's there with her date, a muscular stallion. Hair black as night, skin smoother than Michel Angelo's paintings." He sighs.

I clear my though. "Ugh, uncle. When is the helping part coming up?" I ask and he snaps out of it. "Oh, right. So, she's there with this strong man and I'm there with my cousin Vidalia. So, I walk over and introduce everyone only to find out, this man is her soon to be husband. What can I say, I was crushed. But then the occasion came and I put on my false bravado and I went and sat down at her wedding." He says and takes another drink.

I smile a bit. "So, the priest says 'speak now or forever hold your silence.' And I grab my sisters hand in my mind it accuse her that she is leaving me, Sofia looks me in the eyes and what I see in her eyes shows me that she sees me as a brother of sorts, so if I do break apart her wedding day. I will not only lose the love of my life, I will lose my friend. So, I sat there and I smiled." He says.

My smile falters. "I sat there and I watched the woman I loved say I do and walk away. I let my fear of losing her take away my chance to actually find out if she had loved me at all. And I lost my chance to know what would have happened had I stood there and proclaimed my love to her." He sighs.

I look at uncle in wonder. "That's a horrible story. Why would you ever say that to me! You're not helping at all!" I say to him. He smiles. "Oh, I wasn't finished." He states and I face palm. "Ten years later I stumble upon her at a bar, while I'm with friends. Your father to be exact. We spoke for a moment and then she had left to go back to her friends and your father, you know what he did?" he asks. I shake my head and smile.

"He walks over to me and smacks my arm and says to me, he says. 'Think about the pain of losing her and think to yourself, Jason. Is it really worth to live it twice? Ten years, without speaking to this woman. You have no excuse, take her heart and who knows… maybe she'll give you yours back.' He says to me and punches my arm. So, I sucked up my pain and I walked over and I asked her out." He says.

I nod and he smiles. "She agrees and we date for a few years after all this, where in love and happy. Then on our wedding day your father walks over to me again and says 'I must admit, that day at the bar. I didn't believe you would have the balls. But now I'm thankful you did. For I have never seen you this happy in all of my life. So now, tell me. How does it feel to get your heart back?' he asks me. Well, I smile and tell him that 'I never got it back, but I did take hers.' And you know what your father says to me?" he asks.

I smile but shake my head. "He tells me 'be careful with that heart of hers, break it, stomp it. Do what you will with it, but remember that inside of it, are you. And once you take a heart from a woman, it's not that easy to give it back let alone to fix.' And with that he walks out." Jenks says.

My first reaction is to laugh then I sigh and run a hand threw my hair. "My dad told you that?" I ask. Jenks nods and hands me back the bottle. "Your father was a great friend to me, very dear to my heart. Almost a brother, that is why I felt honored when he had asked me to be the godfather for his daughter." He says.

I smile and hug Jenks. "Thank you, uncle. I really needed to hear that." I say softly. He smiles and pats my back and then I remember "Uncle, what ever happened to her?" I ask. He sighs "She divorced me and stayed with half of my money." He says and I gap at him. "W-what?" I ask.

He shrugs. "Hey, I didn't lose to regret now did I?" he asks. I pinch the bridge of my nose. "How does this whole conversation, in the slightest have anything to do with my relationship problems?" I ask. Uncle shrugs. "I'm not entirely sure, but think about it. Everyone expects you to be the one to slip up, no? Prove them wrong. It may come out leaning in your favor later on." He says with a wink as he walks away.

I stay there standing in the middle of the room with a headache. "What the fuck?" I ask myself. "That made no sense what so ever!" I call after him. I hear his laugh and then a door closes. I take a swig of the bottle. "Yup, I'm screwed and uncle Jenks is fucking crazy." I mumble.

I stay in the living room until it's late and I'm sobered up a bit. I click my tongue as I make my way through the house and up to the guest room that is always reserved for me.

I take out my phone and call Alice, shit it's late. I hope she won't mind. It's like 2am she answers on the third ring. "H-hello?" she asks groggily. I smile. "Hey, Alice." I say as I walk over to the balcony. "Hey, Bella. How was your flight?" Alice asks.

I sigh. "Boring, I must admit, I had more fun when you were with me." I say and she laughs and I sigh. "Look, I just called to let you know I got here safe. Alright? You should go back to sleep." I say.

There's shuffling. "Sure, sure. Yeah, I should go back to sleep. G'night Bella." She says. I nod "Good night, Alice." I say. She's quiet and I sigh. "I love you." I say and there's a big pause and finally she speaks. "I love you too," she says and the line, distance makes the heart grow fonder runs through my head.

I sigh. "Good night beautiful." I say and she giggles. "Would it be stupid to say that I miss you already?" she asks. I laugh softly. "Not at all." I say and we hang up. I walk back in to the room and place the phone in the night stand drawer. I put my head in my hands and sigh. "Smash my heart Alice, break it, crush it, stomp it, cut it, tear it to shreds and leave nothing salvageable… just know you're in there." I say softly before laying down on the bed and my eyes closing in to a peaceful and dreamless sleep.

**Italy, Sunday, **

I wake up to the sound of opera music. I groan and hide my head in the pillow, it doesn't go away. I sigh and lift my head to see an alarm clock sounding. I turn it off and get up from the bed, I rummage through my suitcase and grab my toothbrush and clothes for the day.

I brush my teeth and take a warm shower. I get dressed in a white cotton button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to the crease of my elbows. Faded ripped blue jeans and boots. I put my sunglasses on the top of my head and walk down the hall and down the steps to the kitchen. Once I sit down a mug of coffee is placed in front of me with a bowl of fruit. I look up to see Natasha, the maid's teenage daughter.

I smile. "Thank you, Natasha." I say quietly and grin when she hands me an aspirin and a glass of water. "Drink that first" she says. I nod "Thanks," I say drink the aspirin water and after I finish that I take a sip of coffee. She smiles. "Anytime, Bell. So, what brings you back to beautiful Italy?" she asks sitting down next to me. I smile to myself and shake my head as I take another drink of coffee. "Well, I need to check up on a few things around here… make sure everything is ship shape." I say and involuntarily my eyes travel down her body.

Thank god, she is looking at her nails. I bite my lip and take a piece of fruit and eat it. Natasha giggles. "Well, I assure you. Everything is just as you left it, if not in better shape." She says a hint of flirting in her tone. I raise an eyebrow. "And what exactly are we talking about now?" I ask giving her a grin.

She stands up, giving me a good view under her shirt and at her cleavage. And leans forward to whisper in my ear "You might just have to figure it out, Bella." She says, her hot breath fanning across my neck and my name in Italian. Bella, Beautiful. Beautiful, Alice.

I close my eyes and shake my head "I... um" I clear my though and sit up in my seat "No thank you, I have a girlfriend waiting for me back home." I say looking at my cup of coffee. Natasha laughs arrogantly. "That, my dear, has never stopped anyone before." She says and sways her hips as she walks out of the room. I bite my lip… oh, I hope it's enough to stop me… that is, if I have anything to go back to.

I groan and lean my head on the wooden table, "Shit." I mumble. I forgot that she even worked here. Wasn't she supposed to head off to college like… wait, she's my same age. F-u-c-k me. I feel a hand pat my back. "Hang over dear one?" Uncle asks.

I chuckle. "Not so much as, Natasha hitting on me." I say as I eat some more fruit. He laughs. "Oh, I am not getting in to that. You made your bed, now you lie in it." he says taking some coffee himself.

"I haven't done anything!" I say. He smiles. "Haven't you?... I know you have, and now that girl is more hung up on you than lightning to a metal rod. You said you were losing Alice… what she doesn't know and what makes you feel better don't exactly have to cross roads." He says. I frown and nod once. "Uncle, how many times have you fallen of a horse?" I ask. He stops and thinks for a moment. "Around ten, why?" he asks.

I suppress my smirk. "Oh, no reason." I say and he smiles at me as he takes a long drink of his coffee. I try to hold int he booming laughter that is just waiting to explode. "Speaking of horses, after we eat go to the ranch. We're taking a ride through the vineyard." He says.

I nod and finish up my coffee. "Aye, aye." I say as I start eating my fruit. Horses, awesome. Uncle telling me to cheat on Alice and not tell her… sadly tempting, NOT that I will act on it. Just… I like to imagine the thought but feel too sick to think about it for long. I look down at my half empty fruit bowl and sigh as I place it in the sink drink the last of my coffee and walk over to the stables.

**Forks. Apov**

Shit, my head is killing me. Stupid party, stupid drinks, stupid Rose for dragging me there, stupid… stupid. My head bangs loudly and I shuffle to my bathroom and take a shower and brush my teeth. I can imagine Bella teasing me about the hang over I have.

I groan as I shuffle out of bed and to my bathroom and take a shower. I walk to the kitchen to see all my siblings sitting at the table with their heads down. I laugh softly as I see Jasper cooking. "Hello, bunch of alcoholics." I say as I sit down on the table.

They all chuckle and we just don't talk until Jasper, bless his soul for being designated driver feed us. Placing the food in front of us. "Jazz, did I ever tell you I loved you?" I ask. He tilts his head. "Not in so many words, thank you darling." he says and I eat everything.

Once we are all fed we relax in the living room. "Have you talked to Bella?" Edward asks. I sigh. "I talked to her for like two minutes yesterday at like 3 am. But that's it." I say and he rolls his eyes "You know that's not what I mean." he says and I sigh.

"What do you want me to do Edward?" I sigh and shake my head. "Shit, I am really starting to hate Kate and her big mouth. I hate acting so ignorant with Bella. I have to defend Kate because really she has no friends and by doing that I have to attack Bella." I groan.

Rosalie sighs. "Then why did you kiss her in the first place?" she asks. I stop for a moment and pout. "I didn't kiss her that weekend! I only kissed her on stage and I don't count that as cheating on Bella because it was acting. And Bella was right there." I say and wince. "Shit." I mumble and slap my forehead.

Rose laughs. "Did you finally realize how Bella had to feel when that happened?" she asks, and I nod feeling like shit. I acted like it was nothing, but... "Shit." I mutter again. "But, I saw you two kissing the day of the dinner party." she says. I gape. "I didn't kiss her! she attacked my face! I swear to God! I didn't kiss her. We were talking about Bella and suddenly out of nowhere she leans forward and kisses me. I was so freaked out I pushed her away as soon as I could. How do you think I broke her necklace?" I ask.

Emmett booms out a laugh "Bella is going to be pissed!" he says and I pale. "I know I have to tell her but... I don't want Bella to snap again. She's been on edge. What with the whole Connor anniversary coming up and then us bickering and it's just..." I trail off leaning my head back.

"Who's Connor?" Emmett asks. I pale, shit. Did I just say that out loud? fuck. I open my mouth and close it. "No one." I say. Everyone raises an eyebrow at me and I sag in my seat. "I can't tell you, not my story to tell." I say and Emmett shrugs. "What is he like a best friend or something?" he asks and I wince.

"That bastard wasn't anyone's friend." I say bitterly. Rose's face goes blank. "Well, the guy had to do something to make you hate him so much." she says. I suppress a growl. "Let's just say, he's one of the reasons Bella is the way she is." I say.

"So, he's responsible for her being moody?" Jasper asks. "What? No... holy shit." I say in shock. Bella is moody, sensitive, angry, insecure, protective, territorial, defensive, and on edge... "Shit." I say as I look for my phone. "Great Jasper you broke Alice!" Emmett booms but I ignore him as I grab my phone from the coffee table.

I call Bella quickly. "-I'm not sure what it is that he's looking for but I know it's not on that file. Alice, can you hold for just one second. thanks." she says and goes back to talking with I imagine Jenks. "NO! Not that file, God Jenks you're losing it. The blue folder... Yes the one with the bank account... What? How the hell am I supposed to know if he's Russian?... Just because I know the language doesn't mean... Jenks, just shut up. NO, hush, shut up. You're... Uncle go fall of a horse or something really.. Ha-ha you're so funny i am going to die with laughter, go... just tell Natalia to bring my coffee, you... Just don't hurt yourself." she mumbles and I can't suppress my laughs.

"What are you laughing at pixie?" Bella asks and I laugh again. "God, I really do miss Jenks." I say and apparently I was on speaker because I hear him laugh. _"Alice! I will pay your ticket, come over here and tell Bella to stop being so uptight!" _he says and I laugh as I make my way up to my room ignoring my siblings stares.

"Hello, to you too. Jenks." I say and Bella laughs. "Uncle, no. Just no. Alice you're actually lucky you're not here. I think Jenks has fallen off one too many horses." she says and then I hear a door close. Bella sighs. "He's gone." she sighs and I can just imagine her leaning on a desk chair like she does at her house and massaging her temples. "Aw, what have they done to my baby?" I coo.

Bella chuckles to herself. "Annoy me half to death and the other part is that now, I miss you." she says. I sigh and grin. "Hmm... so distance does make the heart grow founder." I say and Bella yawns. My pour girl, it must be late and she must be doing all the work she can to leave on time.

Bella mumbles her agreement. "Yup, it's funny. Because when where away like this, I honestly don't know why we fight." she says and I chuckle. "We sound like a married couple." I say and grab my chain. Bella hmm's and I can just see that cheeky smirk of hers. "Do you still want to marry me? I have been such a jerk to you." Bella says her voice soft.

My lips quirk up. "Like I have been an Angel?" I ask and I can just feel Bella's grin. "Of course, you are after all my angel." she says and I laugh. "Bella, I think I... I have a theory and I want you to be honest with me ok?" I ask hesitantly. "Um, sure. shoot." she says and I grin but it fades.

"Bella... is it the anniversary of the Connor thing withing this month?" I ask. Bella is quiet, for a long minute before she speaks. "Yeah, how did you?" she asks. and I sigh. "I... I can't exactly tell you because... shit. I just know, you and Rose need to sit down and talk one day." I groan.

"Oh, um... ok?" Bella says and I sigh. "Baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't... now I realize why you're acting so protective and trying to be controlling. I get it now, and I apologize." I say softly. Truthfully. Bella sighs. "No, I'm sorry. Just because I'm losing my mind a bit doesn't give me the right to act the way I am or just flat out accuse you of shit." she says.

I shrug. "We're good... it's kind of relaxing that we can have these conversations without fighting. It's..." I trail off looking for the right word "refreshing" we say at the same time. I sigh. "Anyway I just wanted to see if my theory is right, which it is. And now I get what's going on. And... I'll lay off. I promise." I say. Bella laughs "Aw, no more angry sex." she teases.

I roll my eyes. "Now that you say that, I still have that fucking bite mark on my shoulder blade, thank you very much." I say and Bella laughs. "Well if it makes you feel any better my back is scratched up pretty good." she says and yawns.

I sigh. "Baby, close shop for the day. Get some sleep and relax. Call me whenever you can." I say and with a few more words and love words we hang up. I sigh and sit on my bed. Fucking yes! We're good. Now, I just have to wait until she's here to tell her about Kate and... make her not beat the shit out of Kate... again. I grin as I imagine Kate flinching, shit. Bella is hot when she's all tough bad ass, even if it gets annoying every once in a while.

I walk down the steps with a grin. "I think we're good and no, Edward, I won't tell her until she's here and I'm sure she won't run off with some Italian babe." I say and sit down on the couch. Edward flips me off and throws a pillow at me. I catch it "Shit, Eddie. You throw like a girl." I tease. And just like that we hang out the rest of the day.

_**A/N: ha! and you all thought I would break them up... well maybe. Nah, maybe not. I haven't made up my mind yet... **_


	48. Chapter 48

_**A/N: Here is the next chapter! Funny A/N at the end so after you read the chapter, read the A/N. :P**_

_**I. Do. Not. Own. Twilight.**_

_**Ch.48!**_

_**Bpov**_

I take a deep breath as I start to wake up. I feel a hand on my back rubbing soothingly. I smile to myself. "Ali, stop. That tickles." I mumble as I snuggle my head back in the pillow. Alice's hand start to rub in circles and go down my spine and I shudder.

Then, I remember. I'm in Italy. I jump away from the bed, smashing against the wall next to my bed and turn to look at… holy shit. I open my mouth and try to swallow. "Daniela." I say in shock.

My chest heaves loudly as my eyes roam over the so familiar face. The black hair, olive toned skin, green eyes, bright smile… I shake my head. "W-what are you doing?" I ask as I sit up and run a hand threw my hair. What the fuck is she doing in my room?

"Your uncle let me in. I heard you were back in town and I was wondering if you wanted to… reconnect?" she says with a smirk as she sits on the bed, closer to me. I scoot back against the wall, trying to get as most distance from her and me. My legs are tangled in the sheets.

"Why Bella, you seem frightened. Don't tell me you don't remember me," she says in a low voice. I take a deep breath and sit up. "Um, yeah. I remember you quite fine, Daniela. I'm just… I need some air space." I say and with a pout Daniela sits back in the corner and I quickly disentangle myself from the sheets and jump of the bed.

"One second." I say as I walk to the connected bathroom and quickly but thoroughly brush my teeth. Once I finish I walk back to my room to see her lying down on the bed and I close my eyes and turn on my heels and face the balcony. "For the love of God, Daniela. Put your clothes back on." I say not opening my eyes as I start to imagine Alice.

Alice, Alice, Alice, Alice, Alice, Alice, Alice... good, relaxed... I sigh and shake my head. "Are you dressed yet?" I ask. I hear Daniela curse in Italian before she says I can turn around. I turn around hesitantly before I look at her with a raised eyebrow. "What the hell are you doing?" I ask her.

She fixes me with a glare. "I was trying to get my girlfriend in bed." She says and I frown. "Um… Daniela… we're not together. I have a girlfriend back home in Forks." I say slowly. Daniela stares at me for a long moment. "You promised me that when you came back here that we would be together, Bella." She says, her tone a bit hurt.

I run a hand through my hair. "Daniela that was a year ago, things have changed. I have changed." I say and she shakes her head. "You told me, you promised me I wasn't like anyone else." She says and I frown. Shit, this can't be happening.

I take a step toward her and hug her; she stiffens for a moment before relaxing in my hug. I hide my head in her neck. "You weren't, you will never be like anyone else. You helped me so much, Daniela. I'm just sorry that you got tangled up in my mess. You are so special to me; you will always be the person who picked me up when I was in my darkest time. You saved my life, quite literally," I say and hold her face in my hands as I look in her teary eyes.

I start to hate myself. I really did abandon this girl. I was just too scared at the time. "I left, Daniela. And I know the way I did it hurt you. And you don't know how many times it's haunted me. How many times I wanted to come back and just apologize to you, it wasn't fair. But I was scared Daniela. My dad had just died and you wanted a relationship and… I couldn't give it to you. I couldn't," I say softly and I wipe away her tears with my thumbs.

I offer her a small smile. "I do love you, though. Not the way you may want or the way you deserve, but… I owe you my life," I say and Daniela shakes her head and hugs me, hiding her head in my shoulder as she shakes her head in denial.

"No, you don't. You don't love anyone. You're lying to me. How could you have loved me and leave me like that? I woke up the next day to hear from your uncle that you left back to America. You didn't even say goodbye," She cries and I grimace. I really was a jerk to her.

I hug her to me tightly and kiss the top of her head. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I don't deserve your forgiveness, so I won't even ask for it. But I need you to understand that, you are important to me. You were one of the first, if not the first, person who didn't just want me for sex or for money," I say softly. "I want you, Bella. I wanted whatever I could get," she says.

I close my eyes and shush her. "I didn't have anything to give you. And now… well, now my heart belongs to-" I'm cut off. "Who, Alice?" she asks. I frown and pull away to look at her face. "How did you know her name?" I ask. She smirks and shakes her head as she wipes away her tears.

"I heard you say it a few times in your sleep," she says. I chuckle and pull away from Daniela. "Yeah, I'm in love," I say with a small grin. Daniela shakes her head and actually laughs and pushes me with a sly smile. "Sure, you are Bella," she says. I chuckle. "I am," I say with a grin.

Daniela looks at me for a second, studying me. And then whacks me in the back of the head. I wince. "Ow, what was that for?" I ask rubbing my head. She grins. "For turning me down," she says. I roll my eyes and then *WHACK* "Ouch," I mutter as I rub my head again. "What was this for?" I ask. She smirks. "Nothing, I just missed hitting you," she says with a shrug.

I stare at her warily. "Now I remember why I left," I joke and duck under the hit and smirk at her. *WHACK* "Fuck, stop hitting me woman," I say rubbing my head. She shrugs. "You're cocky, snap out of it," she says and I raise an eyebrow.

She chuckles and ruffles my hair and I swat her hand away. "No," I say as I grab a brush and start to brush my hair. Daniela sighs. "You need a haircut." She says and I nod. "Yup, I do. I just don't know what to do." I say and she shrugs. "Get the same hair cut you had in junior high?" she asks.

I frown. "You remember me back then?" I ask and she laughs. "If I'm not mistaken, you pushed me off the grape wagon so that you could help me up and… what was the phrase?... Oh, yes. 'Win my heart over by your charm.'" She says and I bite my lip.

I laugh and grin. "What? I tried. Not my fault you sprained your ankle and I had to wait on you hand and foot," I say with a smirk. She grins. "You were the best servant ever," she says and I bow. "Glad I could be of service," I say.

"So? Would you like me to cut your hair?" she asks. I stop. "You are not coming anywhere near me with scissors," I say and she rolls her eyes "I'm a hair stylist." She says. I grin. "Where did you study again?" I ask and she flips me off.

"I actually went to Florida with my cousins for a few years. I took a GED test and some free courses down there," She says. I nod and shrug. "Sure, we should get that done before I leave on Saturday." I say and she nods. My phone buzzes and I click my tongue as I walk around Daniela and grab my phone.

"Ciao?" I ask. "Ciao, questo è il telefonodi IsabellaSwan. Corretto?" 'Hello, this is the phone of Isabella Swan. Correct?' the mans asks in a thick voice. "Sì, sono il piaceredi parlare?" I ask. 'Yes, this is she. Who do i have the pleasure of talking with?' I ask as I try to hold back the wince at my full name.

"Si tratta di Victor Santana, da Volturi industrese. Abbiamo parlato qualche giorno fa." 'This is Victor Santana, from Volturi Industries. We spoke a few days ago' He says. I grin. "You know, you can speak English right?" I ask. "Oh, sorry ma'am. If this language is better for you I will keep it in mind." He says.

I frown and nod. "One second please." I say to the phone and look at Daniela. "Look, I have to take this call. Stay around the Villa. I'll go find you." I say and she nods and I walk her out of my room and I walk to the office.

"Hello?" I ask. "Yes, I'm still here." He says. I nod and sit down. "So, to what do I owe the pleasure Victor? Everything ok with my company?" I ask leaning back. "Yes, ma'am. Everything is ship shape. I was just calling to remind you that we are ready to begin manufacturing beer in the PA brewery. And that the Colorado and California breweries are working full force. But we need you in PA for the grand opening." He says. I grimace. "Victor, there's one big problem to that." I say running a hand threw my hair.

"Which is?" he asks. "One, I'm seventeen. Not legal. Second, I am in Italy at the moment working with the wine line." I say. Victor is quiet for a long moment and I laugh. "I'll tell Jenks to show up in my place. Don't worry," I say and he sighs. "Well, if that's all. I must go, I need to get some paper work done," I say eyeing the stack of files on the desk.

"Yes, yes. Thank you. We will keep in touch ma'am." He says. "Oh, and Victor," I say. "Yes?" he asks. I smile. "Its Bella." I say. "A-alright, Bella." He says and I hang up. I grab a file on top and open it and press the button for the speakers that lead to the maid's room.

"Excuse me, could you please locate Jenks for me and tell him to come to the office?" I ask._"Un memento."_ The woman says and I shrug. I did not know she knew Spanish. I shrug as I grab my pen and start checking things I want for the brewery. I hear the door open but I don't look up as I flip the page and run a hand over my face as I read it over.

"You wanted to speak to me, Bella?" Jenks asks. I nod. "One sec, sit." I say with a smile. "It's your house, uncle." I remind him as I flip the page over and scan over it. I hear his soft laugh but I frown at something on this list. "Er… why do we need a second cellar next to the main building?" I ask him, still not looking up from my papers.

"In the occasion that you want to let some of them sit and gain age. They will taste better." He says. I nod and drum my fingers along the desk and sigh. "Fine." I say and flip the paper to the beginning and sign it.

I clear my though and look at him. "The brewery in in PA is done, I want you to go in my place and cut the ribbon." I say and Jenks blinks a few times. "Oh, um… alright." He says. I nod and run a hand threw my hair. "I need you to study the file and be able to answer every single question they may throw at you." I say.

Jenks smiles. "I get it, I get it. I will study the file." He says and I bite my lip. "There's a catch." I say. He frowns. "Which is?" he asks. I bite my lip. "They want you there as soon as possible." I say. Jenks shakes his head. "But I'm needed here. We need to do so much." He says.

I sigh and rub my temples. "I know, but it will look bad if neither one of us goes. I think we will need a full company reunion with the board." I say running a hand threw my hair. Jenks groans. "No, they are terrible. Let alone, they despise me," he says. I smirk. "I'm the chairman uncle, I won't let them fire you. Hell, you're part of the board." I say touching my temples ignoring the soon to be headache.

"You sure about this Bella?" he asks. I nod. "I normally despise anything that has to do with the board, because hello, I don't speak to them and normally I just tell you to inform me of whatever happens in those stupid meetings, but I need to speak to all of them. This stuff." I say motioning to the paper work on the desk. "Does not fall in my vicinity and yet, here it is. How the hell am I supposed to know how to publish the sign that will go on? Don't you think I have more important stuff to do then to figure out what color I want the stupid sign to be?" I ask him.

Uncle nods quickly. "Ok, ok. Yes, I get it. The company is slacking off. I think it's just because your father-" I cut him off. "Left me in charge, and I say what it is that they have to do. If those old farts thing they can boss me around they are mistaken. I will not hesitate to fire all of them." I snap.

Uncle nods. "Alright, I'll call the meeting. Where do you want it?" he asks. I smirk. "Volterra. But, for their sakes, I don't want you to say a word about the fact that I will be attending the meeting. I'm ripping them a new one," I say and Jenks chuckles but nods. I sigh and stand up. "I need coffee. Call up that meeting and make the arrangement to get us there. I'm going to go get a haircut and walk through the vineyard," I say and walk out of the room.

I go to the kitchen and grab a cup of coffee and just as I sit down and lean my head on one arm and hold the cup on the table with the other someone walks in. Daniela, I see. "Hey, Bell. Want that hair cut?" she asks. I sigh and take a sip of my coffee and nod. "Yeah, I just want to call my girlfriend real quick." I say and she winks with a smile. "You are so whipped. It's cute," she says and I flip her off.

I grab the phone from the table and call her. It must be late. "Hello?" Alice's groggy voice comes on. I laugh to myself. "Hey, Alice. How are you, baby?" I ask. There's a ruffle, I imagine her snuggling in her blanket. "I was sleeping, what's up?" she asks with a hint of humor. I chuckle. "Nothing, I just needed to hear your voice." I say. I hear Alice laugh softly. "Why is that?" she asks.

I lean my head on the table. "I have a meeting with the board of directors that are trying to screw my over, because one I'm a girl and two I'm a teenager." I say. I hear Alice pause. "Well, that really sucks." She says. I chuckle. "Want to hear the best part?" I ask. "Sure." She says hesitantly. "They don't know I'm going to be there, so I'm going to rip them all a new one." I say and I hear Alice laugh.

"You go girl, woman power!" Alice says and I snort in my coffee and choke. I cough a few times. "You're crazy." I mumble as I wipe my mouth with a napkin. "Not my fault I'm mentally hilarious." She says. I chuckle. "Sure, well. What I wanted to tell you was that I'm thinking of getting a haircut." I say.

"Hmm… what kind of hair cut?" she asks. I shrug but she can't see that. "I'm not sure, I was wondering if you had any preferences I could let myself be influenced by?" I ask. Alice hmm's for a moment. "You would let me pick out your hair cut?" she asks. I nod. "Yeah, as long as it's not completely ridiculous or something." I say.

I hear Alice laugh. "So the hole Hanna Montana Mohawk thing is out?" she asks. I laugh softly and nod "It's cool but it will not look good on me." I say and we laugh. "Well, baby. For real, I have no idea. Like what hair cut do you like?" she asks. I chuckle. "Have you seen my hair? Its looong, there's not much to do to it." I say chuckling.

Alice suddenly squeals. "Bella! Shane!" she says. I frown. "Who's Shane?" I ask. "Shane! As in Shane McCutcheon! From the L word." She says. I nod. "Ok? What is wrong with Shane?" I ask. "Her hair, cut your hair like hers!" Alice says.

I laugh. "Your kidding right?" I ask. "NO! I mean, it looks awesome and she's a player, you were a player. You know! It would look awesome!" she says. I lick my lips and run a hand threw my hair. "Alice, isn't that like your hair cut?" I ask. "No, cuz, I'm trimming mine down again. So it's not going to be spiky." She says.

I nod. "Alright?" I ask. She slaps her forehead, I know that because I hear the sound of skin hitting skin. "Just cut your hair like Shane's!" she says excitedly. I chuckle. "I'm…" I sigh with a smile at Alice's excitement. "Fine, I'll see what I can do. If I look bad Alice I will paint your hair pink." I warn and Alice gasps. "You wouldn't." She says and I smirk. "Nah, I wouldn't but it was funny huh?" I ask laughing.

"Your mean." She says and I can just see her pout. "I'm not mean, and hey, I'll get the hair cut. Ok? I'll get the Shane haircut." I say and I can just see her smile behind my eyes as she giggles. "Yes! You're going to look hot baby." She says. I chuckle. "Well, I should let you sleep. I just wanted to talk to you for a while." I say.

"I'm glad you called." She says. I smile. "I miss you, I can't wait to get home." I say. She chuckles. "Your house is safe and so is your baby, though Emmett did try to bribe me for the keys to your motorcycle." She says.

I laugh. "Just let him take it for a spin, I know he's going crazy. Oh, and if you run into Jake at school can you tell him to have that training bike at my house that I'll pay him when I get back." I say and Alice giggles.

"Sure, I'll tell him." She says. "Thank you, baby." I say. "I love you, Bella." She says and I smile as I feel that warm feeling I have been missing run threw me. "I love you two." I say and we hang up. I finish my coffee and walk to the back loft where Daniela is at and sit down and scroll in my phone for a picture of Shane's hair I actually like.

Once I get my favorite picture of Shane's hair, I show it to her. "Just like that." I say and Daniela nods before running a comb through my hair. "Why this one?" she asks as she starts to spray my hair wet and I bite my lip with a small smirk playing on my lips. "My girlfriend thought it would look hot." I say and Daniela laughs and pats my head. "Whipped, honey. But I must admit, you're kind of adorable." She says and she starts cutting my hair.

_**A/N: Bella and Alice seem to be getting along well, now that they are far away from each other. Will this continue? Or will they start fighting first chance they get? Will more of Bella's past start to show up now that she keeps meeting people from her past?**_

_**Will Alice be able to handle one week alone without the protection of Bella? Will Kate find a way to trick Alice into going in deeper in her trap and will Heidi be able to make her plan fall in to place?... Find all of this out soon.**_

_**Stay tuned for the next chapter of Choices.**_

_**Nice huh? Stole it from a soap opera… the stay tuned part. LOL.**_


	49. Chapter 49

**A/N: hey guys! Here is the next chap **

**I could own twilight if it was like super rich and my name was S.M. But, I don't, because it's not. So… sucks for me.**

**Ch.49**

**Bpov**

Ok, I'll admit. At first I was scared at how my hair would look but now, looking in the mirror… shit, I did look hot and I looked a lot like Shane. We're both tall, pale, toned, cocky and slightly dark, hmm maybe I'm the reincarnation of her… if she was ever real.

I laugh to myself and smirk, Alice is always right. I sigh and run a hand threw my hair once more, getting used to the feel of it. It's weird but my head feels so light now, I nod twice before taking out my wallet. "No, no. It's a gift." Daniela says. I shake my head and take out a twenty. "No, you worked. You're getting paid." I say and put the bill in her hand and let my eyes smolder the way that I know hypnotizes people.

Her eyes go spaced and I smirk and she blinks and snaps out of it slapping my arm. "Don't do that to me! Insufferable child!" she chastens her Italian accent going full blown. I grin and shrug and just as she's about to argue. Natalia walks out. "Sorry to interrupt you Bella, but Mr. Jenks would like to see you for a moment." She says. I sigh and nod. "I'll be right there." I say and with a kiss on the cheek to Daniela for her hard work and a promise to try and hang out sometime I walk in to the house.

I shake my shirt felling the snippets of hair fall from my neck as I do so. Ugh, I need a shower. I shrug and take a small de tour to my room and switch my normal black T-shirt for a white button down.

Once the buttons are done I walk in to uncle's office. He stops dead in his tracks when he sees me. "You're shitting me right? We have a meeting with the board of directors in two days and you cut your hair like that?" he asks. I grin. "Sorry Jenks. I'm the boss, I can do practically… anything I fucking want." I say with a shrug as I pat my pants pockets and find my cigarette pack.

"Mind if I...?" I ask and he shakes his head and I light up. I take a lazy drag and pull the cig out of my mouth. "I don't see what the big deal is, if they didn't like me then," I blow the smoke out, "they sure as hell won't like me now when I rip them a new one." I say and bring the cig back to my mouth.

"I mean really? Who gives a fuck if they think they're all high and mighty. They aren't shit if I don't want them to be. I tell them to jump; they will learn to answer with how high." I say with a smirk as I take a drag. Jenks laughs softly. "It shocks me how much you are like your father. He would do the same thing." He says and I frown. "He would rip the board a new one?" I ask.

Jenks laughs and shrugs. "Well, yes. That too, but I meant that what you are doing now." He says and I look down at myself. I'm leaning against a short desk, my hip propped up on the side as one hand cupping my neck and the other holds my cigarette, my ankles are crossed in that 'X' formation.

"Oh, um… cool I guess." I say with a grin as I blow out smoke. Jenks chuckles. "It's like seeing him in a young teenager's body. Even that Charm you have with the women is his doing. The ability to just… charm anyone in an instant with just a look of the eyes, a toy of your grin. I swear, you are both so alike." Jenks says and shakes his head.

I chuckle and blow smoke out as I let my head fall a bit, my newly cut bangs fall on my face. I grin around the cigarette, pinching it slightly with my teeth so that I can speak with it still in place. "Two sides of the same coin." I say and take the cig out of my mouth and blow smoke out, "What can I say? It's just who I am." I say and chuckle as I shake my head.

I sigh out a puff of smoke and take out the cig. "Jenks…" I speak quietly. "Yes, Bella?" he asks. I swallow and lick my lips as I look at the floor, not at him. ""What are you supposed to do when you're scared?" I ask, my voice surprisingly even, but with a hint of husky-ness in it.

I hear Jenks pacing stop. "You look for something that makes you feel safe." He states, his voice quiet like mine. The air in the office thick and heavy. I lick my lips again, my mouth is really dry. "What if what makes you feel safe is what's scaring you?" I ask, my eyes lazily going up to look at him threw my bangs.

"What do you mean, Bella? What is troubling you my dear?" he asks. I bring the cig back to my lips and take a drag as I lift my head to stare at him for a long moment before blowing out the smoke and a smirk covering my lips. "I'm self-destructive uncle, if you haven't noticed. I mean I… I can't let myself be happy for long before I start to corrupt it until it's off of me." I say and take another drag.

"Veronica and I, we were good together. Until I started cheating and… then so did she, just to try and make me jealous. She used to be a good girl, uncle. Veronica used to be a total sweetheart and I corrupted her until I broke her. I sucked her into my games and she came out changed and damaged." I say shaking my head rubbing my temple with one hand.

"Connor." I spit his name "He used to be a good friend, protective and strong. He was a good kid until I started hanging around him and influenced him in the wrong way." I say with a hint of a bitter laugh. "He used to kiss his mom every morning and every night, call out I love you's to her when she would call. What happened once I started to be around him?... He became this mean bully of a man. He barely said 'I love you' to his mother anymore." I say closing my eyes.

"A gentle giant, turned in to an ogre by my hand. I pushed him to do things, things I thought he really wouldn't do, but always did. I was… amused by him. He was my personal joke." I say bitterly with a grimace. "Until, I made him snap. A man that would never even contemplate hitting a woman…" I trail off shaking my head.

"Santana, that nice girl who used to look up to me in the halls… the same girl who at first hand could be a good pick for any man to marry. I broke, so… uncaringly." I say disgusted with myself as I feel my guts sink. "All I did was sleep with her once, and it destroyed her. My games…" I say with a grimace as I literally feel sick to my stomach.

"These are just some of the names that come to mind… but the one I'm literally asking you about is Alice." I say, my eyes becoming glassy. "I love her so much, uncle. Yet I taint her so much, I burden her with me. I lash out of her –not physically- and then all I have to say about it is 'I'm sorry'" I say with a hand in my hair.

"I cause fights with her siblings, tears in her eyes, wounds in her emotions, scars on her mind… I'm breaking her and I can see it in her eyes at times that it's taking its toll on her. She's everything to me, yet I push her away… and into the arms of the worst of company." I say, my voice sounding pathetically lost.

I feel a hand on my shoulder and when I look up I see Jenks stare at me with a hard, determined gaze. "You shouldn't speak like that. That girl absolutely idolizes you, you should have seen the way she spoke of you when we talked in Paris." He says. And I put out my cig in the ash tray.

"I'm killing her." I say softly and blow out my last gust of smoke. "Not exaggerating, I can really see the toll it's taking on her. She doesn't sleep, she's never relaxed and I bet me acting like the biggest jerk on earth doesn't help." I scoff quietly. "You are doing no such thing." Jenks says and shakes my shoulder. I look up at him to see him staring intently at me. "Do not be your father, Bella. He ruined his own happiness time and time again after your mother. And I will not stand here and let you commit the same mistakes he did." He says.

I laugh softly and look at the ground before looking in his eyes. "What's the difference Jenks? My father and I are the same. I… I should probably just give up now, no? The less damage done to my Alice, the more likely there is a chance she can be happy without me." I say.

Uncle drops his hand from my shoulder. "What has you so scared child? Is it really the mistakes of your father or the chance that you might seriously get hurt, instead of someone else." He states and I pause to think for a moment.

"Uncle… I don't think I can survive it, if this ends badly." I say my voice so soft, it doesn't even sound like my voice anymore. "It won't, but if it does. You know what you will do?" he asks. I shake my head, I can't exactly tell him I plan on ending my pathetic life. He gives me a smile. "You suck in the pain and let the world think you have won." He says and I frown. "What good is it if the world thinks I'm not affected?" I ask.

Jenks rubs my arm soothingly, like a parent would. "It saves you the pain of facing it." he says and I scrap out a shaky laugh. He hugs me tightly and I feel myself melt into it. Then I let go and he steps back and pushes a lock of hair out of my face.

"Now, let's see what we can do about this board of directors." He says. I push him playfully as I stand and sit behind the desk in thoughtfulness. I smile, my talks with my uncle always make me feel better, even when he doesn't exactly give me great advice.

"I was thinking we could make them think, you were leading the meeting and just as you're about to sit down I will enter and take my seat at the head of the table." I say with a shrug. He laughs. "I love that idea." He says and I chuckle. "That is because you are one for the dramatics." I say sticking my tongue out at him.

He rolls his eyes and sits down on the seat on the other side of the desk and I shrug and grab a file from the huge stack. "First we need to divide all this shit to its respective areas. I am not gifting them with a paycheck. They must work for it, hell. Even I work for my paycheck." I mutter as I flip through this file.

"Call Raul and Francisco and tell them to bring a long fold up table here. We are dividing this shit." I say throwing the file on the desk, grabbing another one. Jenks nods and disappears behind his door.

We spend the rest of the evening sorting through loads and loads of files until we have nothing more to do then just relax for the next day. I laugh at uncle as he curses as he messages his temple and I push him playfully.

"Good night, uncle. I'll see you in the morning and we can set out in the evening to Volterra. We can stay in a hotel for the night." I say as I walk one side and my uncle walks to the other. "Alright, Good night, Bell." He says and I walk to my room.

I take a steaming hot shower, the water so hot my skin gets red. I let my newly cut hair fall on my face as I try to fight off a memory from absorbing me. I'm too far gone, shit.

_I'm pinned against the ratty old boards that used to be a wall in the abandoned house. I feel a shooting pain in my lungs as I try to breathe and I feel the distinct sensation of burning everywhere the cold blade touches._

_I struggle against the strong arm pinning both of mine. I look forward defiantly, the stupid bandana preventing me from screaming. My brown eyes meet his crystal clear blue ones and I feel an involuntary shiver at the malice in them. They almost shine in the dark, the only light in the room is an oil lamp at the far corner where a mattress is at._

_I manage to land a kick on his gut but his blade slashes across my abdomen in a shallow cut but very painful one as I fall down with him. I catch myself with my arms and stumble a bit as I push myself up and manage to run two paces before his meaty hand grabs my ankle and yanks, making me fall on the old dusty floor boards with a thud._

_I claw at the wood in vain as he drags me and I pull one leg back and slam it to his chest pushing him back. I shuffle to where the blade was at and grab it and cut the bandana. I hold the knife in my hands as I glare at him. "I'm going to fucking kill you, you little insolent ass hole." I growl out._

_Connor stands at his full height, his football perfect frame and his strong arms flexing as he runs a hand threw his slick dirty blond hair. He grins at me, his white teeth in such a contrast with his tanned skin._

"_Isabella, put the knife down before you hurt yourself." He says motioning with one hand that I lower it. I smirk. "How about you shut up before I cut your jugular… or your dick." I say and I see a flash of hatred run in his face._

_I take a step back slowly, judging how hard it would be to just run and jump out the broken window and land on the porch roof. My eyes travel back to his. "Tell, me. Why are you trying to rape me… and if it's a good enough answer… I'll actually let you live." I say with a sick smirk._

_He chuckles and takes a few steps forward, his heavy footsteps sounding on the hardwood. "I'm not trying to rape you, Isabella. I'm just showing you what you are missing." He says motioning to himself. His voice like velvet, I curse the moment I showed him how to speak like that._

_I touch the blade to my lips in a thoughtful pose and shake my head. "I was hoping for a better answer." I say and when he's about to speak I dash to the side. Just as I'm about to jump through the broken window he catches my arm and yanks me back in, slamming me against the floor where I hit my head and feel the wood splinter under me._

_The air that was in my lungs leaves in a whoosh and I groan, I struggle for another breath when Connor towers over me with a smirk "You shouldn't try to run from me, my Isabella. I'm not one for foreplay." He says and I turn on my stomach and try to catch a breath._

"_Fuck you." I spit out and I feel his boot connect with the back of my chest, pinning me against the floor again. "Shut up, you insolent girl. I'll show you how a man should be treated." He growls and I laugh breathlessly. "Ok, call up a man and I'll sleep with him. But nothing in this world is going to put me near your rancid dick." I say and he kicks me so hard I'm launched against the wall where I hear a crack but I can't be sure if it's the wood or my ribs._

_I cough a few times as I feel his meaty hands grab my arm and drag me across the dirty hardwood and to the bed. Shit, diss is actually happening. I struggle against his grip but that only makes him turn to back hand me so hard I feel blood pool in my mouth. I hold it in until he throws me on to the mattress almost effortlessly._

_He leans down to lift my legs up and when he looks up to smile at me I spit the blood and saliva at him. Hell, if this dick is going to kill me. I'm going to leave traces of my blood all over him. He groans in disgust and after wiping his face with the sleeve of his shirt I grin up at him as he pulls back his arm and punches me._

_The searing pain in my eye burns but I can't let him win. "Oh, my. What a strong woman you are." I snicker witch causes his hands to freeze before coming up to my neck and squeezing. "Shut up, Isabella! Wont you just shut up!" he yells at me and my hands, instead of going around his wrists go to his face as I slap, punch and claw at his face._

_He lets go of me cursing and I start coughing and send a weak punch his way, surprisingly breaking his lip. I smirk up at him and he just reaches forward and rips my shirt open, good thing I wore a bra._

_His filthy hands slide over my body and I restrain a sob that wants to come out. My hands are still free, is he really this stupid? I send a punch his way and lift my leg up to knee him in the balls. I push him off me only to let him drag me and we start to tumble. I start to feel dizzy, stupid blood loss._

_The smell of blood penetrates the air and Connor grabs at my bra and rips it off my body. I grimace as I try to push him off but he head bunks me in the nose and the blood starts gushing down my though, making me cough a few times. He stands and looks at me. "Won't you just fucking stay still! You bitch!" He growls and again grabs my arm and starts to drag me to the bed._

_My head rolls from one side to the other, too dizzy to focus on much for long. Everything hurts and I feel my arms being tied painfully and I look up to see my hands being tied up with some thick cord._

"_That should do it my Isabella. Now, you really should play nice." He says cradling my face as I flinch from his hand. He tsks and grabs the same old knife from the floor and holds it to my neck. "Be nice, my Isabella. And I'll show you all the pleasure a man can give you that a girl never will be able to." He says and I hear his belt unbuckle._

I gasp for air as I'm pushed out of my thoughts to see that I'm kneeling in the shower with my head against the tiles. My breath comes in short pants as my hair sticks to my face. I run a hand through it and swallow as I lean my head back and cough. I sit down on the floor of the shower as the water cascades on to me.

I bring my knees up to my chest and start to sob. The tears mixing with the drops of water and the sobs smoothing out with the sound of the water. Or so I though. A few minutes pass and there's a knock on my bathroom door.

"Bella, is everything alright?" Natalia asks. I try to hold in a sob as I clear my throat. "Y-yea. I'm fine." I say and my voice sounds so unconvincing. So far from the smooth velvet tone I use every day. "I don't believe you, are you hurt?" she asks sounding worried. I sob quietly. "Just leave me be." I say lowly but I know she heard. "I can't do that, Bella… Bella I'm coming in." she says and I just lean my head on my knees as my shoulders start to shake.

I hear the door open and after a second the curtain is pushed to the side and Natalia gasps in shock. "Bella, that water is freezing." She says worriedly as she shuts off the water. Was it?... I can remember. I think it was fine… I've been colder.

My head tilts up when I feel a hand against my hair and I feel a warm hand cradle my cheeks. "You're so cold, Bella. Your lips are blue." She says and looks around. My head falls back and I lean it against the tile as I lazily look up at her.

She stands for a moment before coming back with a towel. "Get up, Bella." She says softly. I look at her… why would I get up?... I'm comfortable here. Does she really want me to move? I eye her for a moment before she holds her hand out to me and I take it slowly.

I notice that my hand is shaking… and so is my whole body. Once I'm standing on unsteady feet I feel my teeth chatter and I hear Natalia sigh sadly as she covers me with the towel. Strange… she didn't look at my body the way I expected her too.

She kept firm contact with my eyes… which I assumed looked either crazed or dead. I don't know which I prefer. She holds me steady as I step out of it and she walks me to my room where she sits me down on the bed and I look up at her lazily.

What does she want from me?... why is she here?.. I try to speak but all that comes out is gibberish. She gives me a small smile and looks in my eyes. "Why don't we wait until your warmer to have that conversation?" she jokes before walking around the room and opening my doors. She places the clothes neatly at my side and looks at me in the eyes.

"Can you handle dressing yourself, while I go to the kitchen and get you a cup of tea?" she asks. I would have smirked, but I didn't have the energy and simply bob my head once lazily. I have no energy left.

She gives me a soft smile and walks out of my room and after a minute I sigh and get up. I dry myself off as best I can with the towel before putting on my clothes. I leave the towel around my hair to gather any drops from my hair. A few minutes pass and I hear a soft knock on my door. "Bella are you dressed?" Natalia's voice comes from behind it.

I lick my lips and take a deep breath "Y-yeah." I say, my voice sounding raspy and the door opens. Natalia sighs softly to herself as she places the trey with two cups of streaming tea and sits down next to me.

"What's the matter?" she asks softly and I shake my head. "Nothing…" I clear my throat. "You can help me with." I finish. And Natalia brushes a hand threw my hair affectionately as I look at the wall across from me. Natalia leans forward and I feel her lips on my cheek as she gives me a kiss.

My eyes close, expecting her to continue her assault and do something that will lead to me legitimately cheating on Alice. But no, she just kisses my cheek and pulls away then I feel her hand on mine and I open my eyes and look to the side to see her holding a cup of tea. "Here, drink this. It will bring your temperature back up." She says softly and I nod in appreciation as I start taking small sips.

Before long she and I have drunk our cups empty and are just sitting side by side on the bed. I clear my throat to get her attention. "What do you want from me?" I ask softly to her. I feel her shift on the bed. "What do you mean?" she asks and I sigh and run a hand threw my slightly damp hair and look at her "What is it that you want from me Natalia… is it sex? Money?... Emotion… What is it you want from me?" I ask, my tone dead.

Natalia looks at me for a long moment before she shakes her head sadly. "Nothing, I just want to make sure you're ok." She says and I breathe out a humored sigh. "No one, wants nothing from me. Everyone wants something, so what is it you want." I say. Natalia looks in my eyes for a long moment before she leans forward.

I hold my breath, I'm to numb to actually move away from her. I'm to numb to feel anything but… she stops an inch away from my lips and her green eyes meet mine. "I want nothing, except what you wish to give me." She says her eyes looking at my lips and back.

I hold back my smirk and suddenly I pull her to me and hover over her on the bed. She's flat on her back and so fucking willing it makes me want to growl. She breathes deeply and I hold my whole body up with one bend arm as my other hand travels from her thigh, it jumps to her waist, to the base of her ribs to her elbow, to her shoulder and to her jaw. My touches feather light, only touching her with enough pressure that she can tell I actual am. I look at her distastefully, as if I were looking at a piece of art.

My face void of emotion, my eyes look down at her body which is under mine, I'm barely even touching her. I'm hovering over her, my body just close enough to keep her pinned down. My eyes flash back to her face carefully and lean forward until I'm so close I can feel her breath on my lips, I feel her try to shift but my hand moves from her jaw to her shoulder, holding her still under me.

I would smirk, if I thought I could. I'm so fucking numb, it's actually scary. This girl… she would let me. I can tell by the way she's not putting up a fight. I could take her, right then and there. And she wouldn't mind one bit. Hell, she would enjoy it. I breathe throw my nose and inch closer, my lips aren't touching hers but if I moved a bit closer they would be, I look in her eyes, her oh, so willing eyes. "I have nothing left to give." I say and with that I roll to the side and lie down next to her.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath "You may leave now, I only wish to sleep. Thank you for your help, it is appreciated." I say in my monotone. I feel Natalia shift and I feel a hand on my cheek again. I open my eyes to look in to hers and I see… nothing. She smiles at me. "I told you I wanted nothing." She says and I breathe out a bitter laugh.

"You wanted me to fuck you." I say closing my eyes again, propping one arm behind my head. Natalia is quiet. "I only wanted it, if you wanted to do so." She says. I sigh. "Tempting, but no. I'm tired of being the screw up." I say uncaringly and with another chuckle from Natalia I hear her get up from the bed.

She grabs the trey, (I know so by the clinking of the glasses) and she walks to the door. "It's hard to imagine you screwing up anything." She comments before closing my door behind her and I don't even bother to respond. I keep my eyes closed and slowly, ever so slowly, I feel myself getting lost as sleep consumes me.

_**A/N: HAHA, you actually though she would do it! I just know you did! xD and no, that doesn't count as cheating so you can fuck off. She was just proving a point to herself which is, if she wanted to, she could have. She still has a choice on whether to do something or not. That's all she was trying to prove, oh, and to show Natalia that everyone wants something, no matter how small it is. Review!**_


	50. Chapter 50

_**A/N: Hello my pretties, how are you all doing? Well I hope. Love your guy's reaction to the last chap. I can't help it, every single time I get an email that says someone reviewed Choices I get nervous but then I read it and even if its mean… I like it. **_

_**Weird, I know. Anyway, who would have though! 50! 50! Fucking chapters! One idea… caused fifty freaking chapters and more to come! I would have never even phantom the idea! But, here it is. **_

_**And, ok. Let's be fair here and let me explain to you what is going on with Bella, before you all kill me with a pencil. IDK. Anyway, Bella isn't cheating; she's trying to understand what it is people have always wanted from her. **_

_**Read and it will become clear. **_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT, BUT IT'S FREAKING CHAPTER FIFTY!**_

_**Ch.50!**_

_**Bpov**_

I'm sitting on the folding chair on the balcony that stares off in to the vineyard. The light in the room behind me is on, giving me some light as I scribble on the notebook I took from the study.

Alice Cullen Platt

Charlotte Florence Call

Amanda Willington

Cathy Maldonado

Jessica Stanley

Heidi Michaels

Damian Cruz

Sandy Cruz

Veronica Sanders

Madeline Ortega

Jessica Miranda

Julie Fall

Lauren Mallory

Santana Martinez

Jacob Black

Embry Call

Angela Webber

Taylor Crowley

Taylor Bet Anderson

Amanda Sanderson

Natalia Van Allen

Daniela Marie Gerona

Susannah Green

Jeremy Tulip

Jenny Denmark

Victoria Sanchez

Tanya Denali

Irina Denali

Kate Denali

Mrs. Denali

Mrs. Welch

Mrs. Sanchez

Maria Green

Julia Burns

Kettering Pacheco

Kitty Turner

Brandon Weldon

Daisy Ortega

Tai ling Chon

Wanda Epperson

Olive Gregory

Brandy Jules

Mrs. Jules

Mandy Von Sent

Vicky Valentine

Jade West

Demy Hail

Kristen Bell

Kate Ramirez

Mari Carmen St. Augustine

Caroline Del Valle

The list kept on going. I had lost count of how many people I had slept with. It surpassed Sixty. All of them wanting something. Sex, money, attention, more sex, emotion, devotion, passion aka sex. A relationship, sex, an affair… but you can see the pattern can't you?

Most people wanted sex. I take a drag of my cigarette as I flip through the four pages filled with names on the notebook. Making sure that none of them where repeated… they weren't. Most of them girls, but a few lucky guys. I had a small check list at the side of each name.

Simple, fill out what they wanted, the main thing. If it was sex, then I would write it down. If it was attention that would go down. IF it were a relationship, that were it too. And so on.

The next part was, how long did it last. You know, the contact. A few days before you moved on, or did you move on directly. And if it was a threesome, if you stayed after or did you leave.

Stupid little things like that. I had my system down pat already. I woke up a few hours after Natalia had left and, as much as I wanted to, could not go back to sleep. I called Alice three times; she didn't pick up. According to my phone it was around seven to nine when I called.

I shrugged it off and the idea of a list came to mind, so… here I am. It's still dark and I'm writing away in a stupid notebook. After a while I sigh and throw the notebook on the ground next to me and lean back looking at the starts as I smoke. I wanted a hit of Blow, but I left my stash at home.

I could buy some here, quite easily but… I sigh out a puff of smoke, I didn't feel like being in a haze. I wanted to feel something and right now all I felt was nothing… could you even feel nothing? Makes no sense.

I stump out the half smoked cig and sit up on the chair. I could have so easily cheated on Alice, the memory still clear in my head. Natalia was so willing… it actually made me a bit sick. So willing to be corrupted by me. What was so fucking special?

Did I have some crazy power to make you feel important after I slept with you? Did I give you luck to win the fucking lottery? Did I make instantly famous? What the fuck was so great about me after sex? I mean really, I fucked you… then I left.

That was pretty much all I did until Alice. I would meet a girl, charm her, fuck her and leave her. And after that, they still fucking wanted me. I mean, shit. I know I'm great in bed but still… it's a little fucking weird.

"Did you ever get any answers for it Dad?" I ask looking at the sky. I know he won't answer me. He can't, he's six feet under in Forks. I chuckle and roll my eyes. "Is that all we have to offer the world dad? Beer and sex. What a fucking great mix." I laugh softly.

I sigh and run a hand threw my hair and I jump when my phone beeps. I pat the floor and touch it with my finger tips and answer it without looking at the collar ID. "Hello?" I ask, my voice sounds dead. "Bella? It's me, Alice." Alice tinkling voice comes through the speaker and I feel my lips twitch.

"Hey, baby. What's up?" I ask. She giggles at the nickname. "Nothing much, I can't sleep and I got a few missed calls from you. Are you ok?" she asks. I bite my lip, tell her or don't. I sigh. "I… I had a flash back about Connor and just wanted to hear your voice." I say quietly. "Oh, my poor baby. I wish I could be there to give you a hug." She says and I hold in a chuckle.

"I'm fine, but I wish you were here too… the Villa looks great, it's kind of breathtaking." I say and I hear her sigh wistfully. "We will just have to make sure that I can go to the next one." She says and I grimace a bit.

"Alice… Alice baby, I am so sorry for the way I have been acting the last couple of weeks. I'm just… I'm just stressed and when you say little snipes that are just supposed to be spacious… I explode. I'm just so scared of losing you Alice, I swear. I think my biggest fear in the whole world is losing you." I say and I can feel my voice gaining back emotion.

"Shh, baby its ok. It's not like I'm innocent in all of this. I have been rude and hurting you for the past few weeks and I'm sorry." She says and I just sigh. "It's not your fault, and you need to know how bad I feel about how I've been acting and… if you think Kate isn't bad to you… I'll let it go." I say the words burning on the way out.

The line is silent for a moment. "W-what?" Alice asks in shock. "If you think that Kate isn't playing some angle… then, I believe you. I'll stop stressing so much." I say propping my head up on my arm. The words are like acid in my mouth and it nearly kills me to say them, but for Alice I will. I look at the night sky and listen on the phone to... nothing. Why is Alice so quiet? I thought she would be pleased about this.

"Hello?" I ask worried that the line had dropped. "Yeah, I'm here." She says, her voice quiet. I shrug and cleared my throat. "Well, I should go. I need to get some rest." I say stiffing a yawn. Alice agrees and after a few exchanged 'I love you.' we hang up and I walk to the bed and sleep.

As soon as I fall on the bed I sleep. I wake up in a cold sweat, I roll out of the bed and fall to the ground and stumble to the bathroom where I dry heave in to the toilet, the tea I drank last night greeting me. After I spit out everything I slump on the floor with a low thud and concentrate on breathing.

After a few minutes I stand up slowly and rinse my mouth in the sink, after that I brush my teeth and take a shower. I slip on my black, ripped jeans, white button down shirt with the arms folded until mid-forearm, my belt, chain and sunglasses. I stop on my way out of the room when I look in the full body mirror and hold back a laugh.

I look just like Shane, only that my posture is less slouched. I smirk and after I moose my hair I grab my cigs, cell and wallet and walk down to the kitchen. I slide in to my seat and not a minute later Natalia sets a plate with scrambled eggs, bacon, and a cup of water in front of me. I give her a nod and a small smile and she grins.

"Still not sleeping with you." I say and she laughs and whacks my head playfully. "We will see." She says and runs a hand along the back of my neck as she passes. I roll my eyes behind my glasses before slipping them off and eating my breakfast. Once I finish Uncle makes his way in and pats my back before stopping.

He tilts my head down and chuckles. "I didn't know you had a tattoo at the back of your neck." He says. I shake my head out from under his hand "I have a few, this one is just good and bad." I say bored as I take my last bite of food.

"What inspired it?" he asks. I smirk as I stand from the chair and look at him from under my bangs, my smirk in place "You always have choice uncle. And those choices normally revolve around two things. Good or Bad. That's what inspired it." I say as I take my plate and walk to the sink and place it there, my boots sounding on the tile floor.

I scratch my neck. "I'm going out for a bit, I'll be back in time for us to leave to Volterra." I say and with that I grab the keys on the counter and the helmet on the seat. I had asked uncle to rent me a motorcycle.

I fasten my full face helmet and grab the leather jacket from the post next to the door and slip out. I get on the shiny Red Suzuki Hayabusa and speed down the dirt road. The feeling of the wind smashing against my clothes soothing me.

**Apov**

Did I just dream of what Bella told me yesterday? I mean… she's going to be cool with Kate?... I doubt it. I sigh as I get out of Edwards Volvo and lean on the car as my family and I wait until its time.

We have half an hour to kill. I hear three motorcycles and I turn my head just to remember that Bella is in Italy. I watch as Leah, Jake and Seth all park their bikes and start bickering, playfully pushing each other and making faces.

I chuckle to myself and look back at my family who are in a deep concentrated conversation. "No, she should. It's the right thing to do." Edward says. Jasper touches his arm. "It's not our decision to make her." He says. Em huffs. "She didn't mean harm and if she tells it will. No one knows besides us, so she's not going to find out. I say we stay quiet." He says and Rose smacks the back of his head.

"No, Emmett. That helps no one. If she tells Bella what happened that night, Bella will flip the hell out and probably end up killing Kate. Only reason she didn't last time was because Jake grabbed her." Rosalie comments.

I sigh and fist a hand in my hair. "It's not up for discussion." I snap at them. They all turn to look at me and I glare back at them. "I'll tell her when I feel its time and it's not up to you four to convince me of what to do." I say. "Alice, you still don't know what to do." Edward says and I shrug.

"Your point being what? That you four, the same four that only Emmett has been accepting of Bella. You three don't like her, and hate the idea of me dating her. Emmett isn't thrilled but at least he is civil. Now, if I were to look for anyone's opinion it would be Emmett's and –no offence Em- I'm not. So I would appreciate it if all four of you took your nose out of my business and butt out." I say turning to look around.

"I didn't want to have this conversation at home and I sure as hell don't want it here." I say lowly to them and fix my jacket. "Shit, chill Ali. We're just trying to help you out." Jazz says and I let out a bitter laugh as I look in the hidden pocket of my jacket and find my cig. So much for wanting to quit.

I take one out and light up and rub my eyebrow with the palm of my hand. "Why help me out now? Why not help me out when Mom was on a rampage practically selling me to Kate? Or when Dad kept comparing Kate and Bella? You guys didn't help out when I needed it, so all I need of you now is to fuck off and stop trying to control my life." I say glaring at them.

At the least they have the decency of looking sheepish. I smirked and took another drag looking around the parking lot. "Alice, I know we haven't acted it but.. we really don't hate Bella as much as you think." Rose spoke. I roll my eyes. "Oh, no. Of course not, you know how ridiculous it is that we have waited six months for you to warm up to her? Do you know how stupid that is? Six months… Then I have to act like the stupid ignorant girlfriend and defend the hell out of you." I say laughing in a puff of smoke.

"I'm tired guys. Accept her or not, it's still my relationship. I'm just sick of all the stress my 'family' has caused in our relationship. Just stay out of our way and I'll stay out of yours." I say with a sad sigh as I throw the half-finished cig in to a puddle at their feet and lift my hood.

I readjust the strap on my shoulder as I make my way in the wet pavement to where Jake and the 'pack' -as Bella calls them- are. I give them a smile. "Hey." I say as I walk over. Leah pushes Seth to Jake and straightens up and grins. "Hey, Alice. Bodyguards ready for duty." She says giving me a salute.

I chuckle and raise an eyebrow. "Bodyguards?" I ask and Leah sighs and walks over to me, putting her arm around my shoulder. "You see, in the mind – the very, very fucked up and slightly crazy mind – of Bella, the school is like a mouse trap, actually not just one. It's like… a mouse maze and with every wrong turn there is a distinct trap." Leah say sand I see the guys chuckling as I nod along.

"She is, in a way, the nice cat, that instead of… well no. She does eat you, but that's not what we're getting at." She says wagging her eyebrows as I elbow her. "So, she's the nice cat that doesn't eat you and instead she leads you to safety. So, in her mind, now that she is not here, it's up to the dogs –which is us- to protect you from all the killer mouse traps." She says.

"And I'm the mouse why exactly?" I ask unsure. Jake chuckles. "I think it's because you're so small." He says and winks. Seth chuckles and pats my head. "Leave the pixie alone, or Bell will have our heads." He says and I give him a small grin.

"No, it's not because she's small. She is the mouse because she is… hmm… why are you the mouse?..." she wonders and I laugh along with Jake and Seth. "Just ignore her, I think she slipped in some valiums with her coffee." Seth says.

I nod and pat her head. "You're really crazy, Leah." I say and Leah grins. "Shut, up. Alice. I did not drink Valium. Seth is just saying that cuz he's bored." She says and I frown and pull away looking at all three of them. "You are all crazy." I state and they give me wolfish grins, not even bothering to attempt to deny it.

I shift and Seth starts laughing. "That is coming from the girl who is dating Bella." He says and we all start laughing. Jake sighs. "So, how is Bella? Haven't talked to her." He says. I smile. "Oh, now that I remember she told me to tell you that she wants my training bike to be at her house by Friday. She said she will pay you when she gets back." I say and he nods.

"Sweet, I needed some quick cash for a new bike I'm going to be working on." He says. "Oh, she also said hi to all of you and that quote "I am going to kick the board of director's ass" she wanted me to tell you guys." I say with a shrug. They all grin. "About time! They have been swamping her unnecessary work, that's part of why she's so on edge these past few weeks." Seth says.

I nod and bite my lip and look to the school, I point my thumb over my shoulder. "I should get going, Mr. Mason doesn't like it much when I'm late." I say and Leah and the gang nod and grab their book bags.

I walk with them until they have to leave to go to their classes and I leave to go to mine. I'm right along the corner when a strong hand grabs my forearm and pulls me in to the janitor's closet. My back hits the shelf with an "oomph" escaping my lips. The room is actually quite large and then I pale when I see the three girls that actually pulled me in here.

On a change of events Victoria wasn't there. But that was changed with the rather intimidating Heidi with the two Denali's Irina and Tanya. Heidi is actually leaning against the rack at the back looking at her nails, rather bored. Tanya is in the middle glaring daggers at me and Irina is just smirking.

I huff and stand straighter. "What's up?" I ask. Tanya grins and her heel's –yes, heels in school. Crazy I know- click against the linoleum as she walks over to me. "Oh, nothing. We're just enjoying our Bella-free week." She says and I chance a glance to see Irina looking at me and Heidi looking at the roof.

Surprisingly she speaks. "Tanya, you hurt that girl physically and Bella will kick your ass… again. And I'll fucking tape it just to hear you cry." she says chuckling. I smile, maybe I have an ally here. "She's right. Bella will beat you up." I say taking a step to the side only to have Tanya hold my hip and smile down at me.

"Oh, but I like it rough." She says and pushes me back against the rack. She takes a step closer so I'm pinned by her body, she holds my good arm with her hand and the other is still at my hip.

"I bet you like it rough too." She says and I feel myself gulp. Shit, there are two, possibly three girls here that want to beat me up. I can barely fight one. I take a deep breath. "If… If you let me go now, I won't tell Bella." I say and Tanya chuckles softly. "Oh, but you won't tell Bella." She says.

I raise an eyebrow. "Want to bet?" I threaten. I need to use Bella's leverage to get me out of this. "I'm positive. You see, Alice. We have some… let's call it, secrets on you." she says giving me a cat ate the cannery grin.

"Secrets? I don't think I have any." I lie smoothly. I have always been a good liar, let's just hope they can't figure it out. Heidi snorts. "We all have secrets, Alice. Every single one of us. Bella has secrets." She says giving me a grin.

So much for an ally. "Bella has so many secrets it's like meeting a new person every single day. And if I have secrets and Bella has secrets... What makes you think that you don't have secrets." She says. I frown, is she talking in riddle?

"Um, I don't have secrets with Bella." I clarify, still partly a lie because of Kate. KATE. Shit, she better not have told them. Irina laughs softly. "Oh, I think you do. Alice." She says.

"Look, just let me go. This is really uncomfortable." I mumble as I feel something poking me just below the ribs. Tanya laughs softly and cups my cheek and looks at me, like I'm a doll she is going to buy. With judging eyes. "I can see what Bella sees in you. Can you girls?" she asks looking back at the other two. She steps away so that the other two can ogle at me.

I huff and Heidi smiles. "That's a wild one, damn. I really wish Bella would share." She says giving me a grin and a wink. Irina snorts. "She has nothing on me, that's for sure." She says and looks at her nails. Heidi laughs this time. "You're right, she's not ugly." Heidi says and Irina glares.

Heidi winks at her. "Hey, I'll still fuck you. Just make sure the lights are off." She says and laughs at Irina's glaring face. Tanya touches her lips and looks at me, I swear. They look at me one more time, I am going to fucking punch her.

"She has this… pure quality. She's too innocent, I think I'd burn in hell if I touch her." Tanya says and Heidi laughs. "Since when did you think you were going to heaven?" she asks. Tanya laughs. "Never really… really is a shame you never got to touch her, eh Heidi." Tanya says with a grin.

My eyes flash to Heidi's and back to Tanya's before going back to Heidi. She sighs. "Real big shame, would have loved to see what you can do." Heidi says wagging her eyebrows. "Fuck off." I growl out.

Heidi's eyes shine. "oh, she's a feisty one. God, Bella must have so much fun fucking this one." She says and I can't help the blush that forms on my cheeks. Shit. Irina laughs. "Aw, she's a prude! Isn't that adorable." She snickers. "I told you to fuck off." I growl at her.

Irina frowns playfully. "Aw, why? Wouldn't it be more fun, just to fuck me?" she says. I smirk. "Wouldn't touch you with a ten foot pole." I say and Tanya and Heidi laugh as Irina takes a step forward. "Why you little brat." She growls and lifts her hand like she's about to slap me when the door opens to reveal… shit, Kate.

"Irina, put that hand back where it was or I will hit you." Kate's voice sounds bored as she closes the door behind her and pushes past her sisters to look down at me. "Are you ok?" she asks. I offer her a small smile. "I'm good." I mumble and she sighs before turning around "Why am I here?" she asks before grabbing a bucket and sitting down next to me.

Wait, what? Fuck, I am dead. Well, maybe not. With Kate here at least I do have an ally-ish person. "Because, we think it's only fair to humor you." Heidi says in a bored voice again. I raise an eyebrow. "Humor you, how?" I ask looking at Kate.

She rolls her eyes and shrugs. "Hell if I know, my sisters are fucked up." She says. I look at my watch. "Look, I'm late for class. I really need to go." I say and Kate touches my arm. "I told Mr. Mason that you didn't feel well and went to see the nurse. Then I told him that I was going to accompany you seeing as Bella isn't here." She says.

My eyes narrow. "Why did you say that?" I ask her. Kate stands up and looks at me. "Because, I knew that if your late its most likely have something to do with those psychopaths." She says.

I chuckle. "Yeah, cuz you are so sane." I mutter. "Hey, I'm here to make sure they don't fuck you up." Kate snaps at me. I smirk. "I would actually love to see that. Because the moment any of you touch me. Bella will have your heads on a platter." I say. Heidi laughs. "Not, if she thinks you're here alone with Kate." She says and snaps a picture of me and Kate with her phone.

She grins. "Perfect, now I have your attention." Heidi says. I roll my eyes. "Bella is not going to believe you. She will believe though that you four wack jobs have me trapped in a supply closet." I say.

"True, very, very true. But, who of us four has the track of being exceptionally violent?" Tanya asks and they look at Kate. Kate chuckles. "Hey, I haven't done anything. I thought this was about messing with Alice and I came to spring her." Kate says.

I stuff my hands in my pockets and I feel my phone. I flip it open and press number #3 witch is Leah's speed dial. God, please let her pick up. I clear my throat. "So, please tell me again why you all trapped me in a supply closet on my way to class again?" I ask.

"Well, we want to talk about the night we went over to your house." Tanya says with a grin and I end the call. They don't need to know about this. I frown. "And what day was that?" I ask. Tanya smirks. "I think it's the day you kissed my sister, after an awful fight with Bella." She says teasing me. I look at Kate to see her pissed off. She stands up and pushes her sister. "Shut, up. Nothing happened that day, just because you think otherwise is not enough to fuck up her life." Kate growls.

My face goes blank, Kate's actually… defending me. I didn't expect that. Just then the door is pried open by a very pissed off Leah, Jake and Seth. Leah enters the room and pushes past the girls to get to me. "You ok, short stuff?" she asks. I nod. "Yeah, I'm fine." I say and she smirks. "Smooth move calling me like that." She says and I grin.

Then Leah turns on her heel to glare at the Denali sisters and Heidi. "You're all going to be dead." She growls. I hold her arm. "Um, Kate actually… she actually defended me and prevented Tanya from hitting me." I say and Leah looks surprised to say the least. She meets Kate's gaze. "That true?" she asks and Kate nods.

Leah nods once and pulls me close to her. "Stay away from Alice. Just because Bella isn't here doesn't mean she's free for the picking. She's still protected by us and I bet Bella is going to be so pissed when we tell her about this little incident." Leah smirks.

Tanya and Irina's smiles falter and Heidi clicks her tongue. "Tanya, Irina. You both are screwed." She says. And Leah laughs. "So are you Heidi." She says and Heidi smirks. "Think about it this way, Leah. Bella, in all the time I have known her… has never hit me. She has been border line pissed at me and has yelled at me a few times but hit me… never." She says with a smirk and a stare at me before flipping her hair over her shoulder.

"Well, she has been rough, but I don't think angry sex really counts." She says giving me a smirk. I growl under my breath at her and she winks at me. "Besides, it's not like I ever keep secrets from Bella." She says and with one last glance at me she turns and walks to the door. "Excuse me boys." She says to Seth and Jake and they make room for her to leave.

Leah growls softly. "Stay away from Alice." She repeats to Tanya and Irina before eyeing Kate. "For now… you're cool. Doesn't mean we won't have our eye on you." she says and Kate grins "Wouldn't dream of it." Kate says and Leah pushes past the sisters pulling me with her.

After we're across the school Leah turns me around and looks me up and down. "You ok?" she asks. I nod and Seth and Jake sigh. "Thank God, Bella would have killed us." Jake mumbles and I crack a smile.

Something Heidi said struck me, _'Besides, it's not like I ever keep secrets from Bella'_ are Bella and Heidi really that close? And what was Heidi insinuating. Does she know about Kate kissing me that day. Shit, the longer I wait the more people seem to know about it.

Except for the person who should have known first. Damn it. I'm snapped out of my thoughts by Seth. "Hey, Alice. You feeling ok? It's time for second period." He says and I nod. "Yeah, sure. I'm fine." I say and all three nod before walking with me to my next class. Let's just say that for the rest of the day, I was escorted by them to every single class.

I felt safe, but it wasn't the same as when Bella was with me.

_**Kpov**_

I smirk as the door shuts and I look at my sisters. "That worked out better than I expected." I say with a grin. Tanya chuckles halfheartedly. "It worked out for you, bitch. Didn't work out for me." she says and I shrug. "Should have been smarter than to think the pack wasn't going to come find out what happened with her." I say and Irina sighs.

"Who cares? We got the message clear. Heidi delivered her part, Tanya delivered the small threat, and you got the trust ratio with the pack. Now, all I have to do is edit this nice tape to make is sound like we just walked in on you two making out." Irina says smirking.

I chuckle. "Bella is going to be so pissed and heart broken, then Alice and I will act like the victims of this whole ordeal pushing Alice into my arms." I sigh with a grin at my sisters. Tanya smirks. "We really do work better together. Heidi was right." Tanya says and the door opens.

"Of course I was. Have I ever steered anyone wrong?" she asks looking at her nails. I raise an eyebrow. "Well there was that time in the third grade where- uff" I mutter when she throws a book bag at me.

"Keep that safe. And don't look inside. Its only for Irina and me to see. Understood?" she asks. I frown. "What is it?" I ask. Heidi grins. "It's all the recordings and videos I could grab of me and Bella. Be it having sex, back in the good old days or talking in the current ones. I think there is enough there to get a decent video made. One that we can show everyone… and one that can just be for me." Heidi says and I grimace.

"Why bother, I've had sex with Bella. Not that mind blowing." I say and the three girls look at me unbelieving. "How the fuck are you even gay and don't like sex with Bella?" Tanya asks. I shrug. "I don't like her normally, what makes you think I would like sex with her." I say.

Heidi smirks. "Who wouldn't like sex with Bella? And the only reason you didn't like it is because right in the middle of sex you passed out, drunk as an old man. I remember the look on Bella's face went she walked out of that room that night of the party. She looked like someone had just smacked her mom." Heidi laughs and I blush and glare at her. She smirks. "Oh, don't worry. I calmed her down quick enough." She says and gives me a wink.

"Ew, for Gods sake's she screwed your mom." I say to her and Heidi shrugs. "Made her happy enough to stop bitching about her sleeping over. Besides, she screwed your mom too." She says and I look at Tanya and Irina to see them grinning at each other. I grimace. "Ew, that's just… ew." I mutter as I walk away.

I sigh. "Count your days Bella. Shit's going to hit the fan very soon." I mutter harshly as I walk and enter my next class.

_**A/N: DUUUM, DUUUM, DUUUUUUUUUM! Should Bella count her days? What was on those tapes? We should find out soon, what is there plan dough? How long will this crazy ness last? Will Alice have the guts to tell Bella that Kate kissed her?**_

_**WILL I EVER STOP ASKING YOU QUESTIONS? Answer to that: no, cut I feel like that deep voice at the end of a really good comic. Stay tuned next time on! CHOICES! **_


	51. Chapter 51

_**A/N: Wow, love your guy's response to my writing. Can't fight the grin off my face every single time a read a was co-written with A Thousand Undiscovered Stars, who is also my new Beta! **_

_**Undiscovered has serious skills, and also has a spin off of this story called Selfless, but still Selfish. Check it out! **_

_**SHANE'S HAIR IS SEASON FOUR WHEN SHE MEETS PAPI.  
**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT, but I do own this plot, so I think I'm heading in the right road. **_

_**Ch.51**_

_**Heidi Pov**_

I sit on the bed in Irina's room. Who would have though the dumb bitch could actually edit something?... I sure as hell didn't. Fuck, I'm surprised she knows how to work a camera... Then again so do porn starts and they're not the sharpest tools in the shed.

I sigh as I lay down on the bed and turn my head to see Irina skimming threw different videos. I smirk. "Enjoying my porn, perv?" I ask. Irina snickers. "Not exactly, I'm just wondering how the hell you have so much footage of Bella and you having sex or even just talking." She says.

I bite my lip. "It's not exactly easy but with my sweet Bella's 'habits' she almost never notices much." I say as I twirl a peace of my hair between my fingers. "So, you want me to make a video of what exactly?" Irina asks as she turns in her computer chair to look at me.

I bite my lip in though. "Well, I first want to sort through the videos of Bella speaking and maybe we can make something up then just glue that conversation on to a video of us under the sheets and just break Alice's little old heart." I say and Irina clicks her tongue. "Yeah... That's not going to work out." She says.

I frown and sit up on the bed. "Why not?" I ask. She stares at me like I'm stupid. "Because, it's not our goal to make Bella look like even more of a player. Our goal is to break Alice and Bella up so that we have our girl back." She says.

I sigh. "Fine, so what do we do? Just edit a conversation and… I have a great idea." I say smiling. Irina raises an eyebrow. "Well, we edit an audio to make it sound like me and Bella are talking and that we're getting a little too close for comfort. Then I just steal away Bella's phone one day and call Alice and play that tape on the phone." I say and Irina grins.

"Alice thinks Bella is cheating, will flip out on Bella. Bella will get pissed and will just do something unpredictable and will leave. Then we have Alice alone, corner her again, and tape her talking to us. Record her. Then we can edit a video and… holy shit, I know exactly how we're going to show this video to Bella." Irina says and I smile, I think I have an idea of what she's thinking.

"This is going to be, fun." I say and Irina bites her lip for a second. "What if Bella gets all dark and scary again like when her dad died?" Irina asks. I smirk. "There is nothing wrong with Bella that sex can't cure." I say and flip my hair over my shoulder.

**Bpov**

The meeting started; that's my cue. I take a deep breath and open the door. "Hello, to you all. Sorry I'm late, had a bit of traffic. Now, I don't think I need to introduce myself, but just in case. I am Bella Swan." I say as I walk around the side of the table and to my seat.

Jenks is seated next to me. I smirk slightly and clear my throat. "I guess you are all wondering why I asked you all to be here, correct?" I ask. There a few grumbles and disapproving stares and I sigh. "You are all fired!" I say loudly and the room goes quiet.

Jenks stares at me in shock and I laugh softly. "Now that I have your attention will you all please be quiet." I say and a few quiet grumbles but nothing more. I nod. "Good, now. It has come to my attention that you all have been slacking off." I say standing up from my chair.

A pale blond, heavy set man stands up "Miss. Swan, with all due respect what are you doing here?" he asks. I smirk and look at him condescendingly. "What does it look like I am doing Mr. Delmont?" I ask. He looks taken back that I know his name I give him a smile. "I'm here to see exactly what it is that is the problem with you sorry excuses for workers. Now I suggest you sit down before I fire you just for interrupting me." I say and the man shuts up and quickly sits down.

I look at them for a moment. "I'm a fair believer in that if something is going wrong, the first place to look is not where it is lacking. It's where it's getting its information from. Now, all of you must know this. But I feel the need to remind you all that you are replaceable. Every single one of you has a replacement and in knowing that you should all still be working just as hard as you worked the first year you started." I say.

I smirk to myself. "I know it might be, disgruntling. Being lectured by a seventeen year old girl. But do not forget that this seventeen year old girl is your boss and knows this company even better than I knew my father." I say.

There all staring at me and I sit back down. "Now, I want progress reports on every section, starting now." I say and point to the balding man at the end of the table. "You, what is your position?" I ask. He hesitates before speaking. "I'm, VP of advertisement." He says. I nod "How is that going?" I ask.

He frowns. "It's going well; our buying rate has increased ten percent from last years." He says. I click my tongue. "Interesting…" I mumble and look at the blond elder woman in the middle.

"And you Miss. What is your position in this company?" I ask. "I'm director of manufacturing." She says. I nod "How is that going?" I ask. "It's going great; we are on schedule on every single task." She says and I smile. "Ok, so let's say… there is an earth quake right now in the vicinity of one of our company's and… ten boxes of our bottled beer cases fall down. Will we make that delivery?" I ask.

She stops for a moment. "Um, no. There was an accident, we need to fill in a report and then try to make back that money lost." She says and I smile at her. "Good, one. One out of… fifteen people are doing their job." I say looking at the board members.

The woman smiles and ducks her head, her cheeks red from my compliment. Hmmm, no. You have Alice, no Bella. NO. What if I just… NO, Bad Bella, get back inside. I shake my head for a moment and clear my throat.

"Now, I'm not here to yell at you because in reality I'm really tired. I slept like crap and it's too early for me." I say and stand up and motion for Jenks to go outside and grab the things. He nods and walks away. I sit on a corner of the table and look at them.

"Now, my job normally runs smoothly. I get papers, I read them over and if I like what I see, I sign them and send them back. If I have a meeting with a client I stay up until god knows when, sometimes even missing a night of sleep or two just to close a deal. If I need to make a contract I contact Jenks have him read it over, maybe ten times and then I send it." I say running a hand threw my short hair.

"Now, I just want to know one small thing." I say looking at them. "When was the last time you missed a night's sleep for this company, honestly. I want no bullshit. Pardon my French." I say looking at them. I nod. "In one month, I usually miss sleep ten days out of the twenty or even thirty. Depending. Those are hours of my personal life I take out for this company. Hell, I'm not even supposed to be working with all this stuff until I was eighteen, I have been dealing with this stuff since I was seventeen." I say looking at them.

"Now, thank God I did. Could you imagine the damage you people would have caused to my company? Had I not taken charge with Jenks as my front man?" I ask. They are all quiet and its pissing me off a bit. "You are not children. You have studied and are adults. Now I want to know why it is, that you are all slaking off and sending things to me! for checking when it does not fall in my area." I say and Jenks walks back in and starts handing files to every single person.

"Those were sent to me personally by all of you, now. Isn't it supposed to be my job to just read it over and if everything is in ship shape, I sign? Now, why is it that there are so many forms I have to fill out when all I am supposed to be doing here in Italy is making sure people like you don't steal my fucking money." I yell. A skinny man with flat brown hair stands up. "Miss, these files do fall in your area." He says in a condescending tone.

Is the little fucker mocking me? I smirk. "Really, hand me that file." I say and he walks over to me and hands it to me. I open it and read just the first line and laugh. "Ok, interesting. Since when is it any of my concern if I quote "The manufacturing area is clear to deliver all I need is the format E and G filled out to do so." Darling. I don't know if you know this. But the format E and G… those files that let us send things from point A to point B that's your job." I say and close the file handing it back to him.

He shakes his head. "No, it's your job to send me those formats." He says and smirks. I nod. "Alright, you know where I'm going to send you, even better?" I ask. He shakes his head. "I'm going to send you home. And then, even better I am going to send you to the unemployment line the next second you open your mouth to speak gibberish to me." I say and his face goes blank.

"The format E and G are supposed to be on your desk. Now, how is it my foul if you are too busy not doing your job to misplace them. Now I know whose fault it is that we are missing deadlines. Thank you for clearing that doubt up, you have one week to show me progress on your side or you will be unemployed. Consider this your warning." I say and hand him the file back.

He nods once, his cheeks burning a bit as he walks back to his seat. I run a hand threw my hair. "Anyone else wants to be a big boy on campus and try to scare me off?" I ask. They all shake their heads and I nod. "From this moment forward you are all under warning. I expect progress reports within the month. - Except for you Skippy, I want reports from you in one week. - or I will have no other choice then to fire you and re hire." I say.

A thick man, with balding hair speaks up. "Miss, don't you think it's a great risk to just, get a new board of directors? It could be very dangerous." He says and I shrug. "I'd rather have danger of an unexpected cause than to have danger I know is here and ignore it. This company does not give away paychecks. It's about time you all understood that. My father was an easy going man, with a brain for business." I say and lean back in my chair.

"I am not my father. I have a brain for business, yes, but when it comes to something as important to me as my company I am not easy going." I say and then I plaster a smile on my face. "Now that we have that out of the way, why don't you all start reading those files and tell me what exactly they are about and if they have all the documents I will read them and get back to you." I say.

Just like that, the meeting really started. Everyone speaking politely about how to make this work better. You could actually see how they were searching those files and some of them would call their assistants on their phones and ask them to bring them files that were not completed and what not. The meeting stretched on until the wee hours of the morning.

We had all ordered food and eaten in the board room and joked for a while. It's good to see that the board was warming up to me, even Skippy... What was his name? I can't remember; he shall always be Skippy to me. I retreat to my hotel room and crash. Two more days. Two more days and I'll be home. I snuggle my head in to my pillow and let my exhaustion consume me.

~Two days later~

**Apov**

Finally. Bella's coming home today… Now, I just have to figure out what I'm going to do about the whole Kate kissing me situation. Damn it.

I'm sitting in the living room trying to figure this all out when the sound of a horn interrupts my thoughts. I look up, confused, standing up and going to look out the window. I gasp.

"No way!" I exclaim excitedly, causing my family, who were all scattered around the living room, to look at me. I ignore them and run to the front door, pulling it open and rushing out. And there she is, leaning back against the side of her car and smirking at me.

"Bella!" I cry, rushing forward as she moves swiftly forward to pull me into her arms. She picks me up and swings me around and I laugh before she gently sets me back on the ground.

I pull away slightly so that I can kiss her. God I missed doing that, but I can't help the flash of anxiety that I feel when a voice in the back of my mind reminds me that I still haven't told Bella about Kate kissing me.

After a moment, Bella pulls back from the kiss and grins at me. "I missed you, too, baby," she chuckles before pulling a mock serious face. "Now, are you satisfied with the hair?" she asked playfully and my eyes widen as I realize that I hadn't even noticed her hair.

I look up and grin widely. "It's perfect! Now, you look just like Shane!" I exclaim happily. "I can't believe that you actually did that for me…" I say wonderingly and she smiles softly, leaning forward so that her lips are near my ear. "I would do anything for you," she whispers and I hold her tighter. I feel so unbelievably guilty right now. I know that I have to tell her, but…

I pull back and tuck myself into her side. "Come on, let's go and say hello to my family before they decide that we've had enough alone time and come interrupt us," I grumble, only half-joking, and she smiles down at me as we walk towards the front door.

As we enter the house and walk towards the living room, I can see that they're all in there and suddenly I can't help but feel like a prisoner walking towards the firing squad… I shake off the thought and smile up at my fiancée.

"Bella, thank you so, so, so much for letting me ride your bike. It was awesome!" Emmett says excitedly her before the silence can drag on and I mentally thank him. Bella chuckles. "I'm glad you enjoyed it, but don't get used to it," she warns him playfully and he mock pouts, making Rosalie laugh and smack him lightly on the shoulder.

"Hey, Bella," Jasper greets her and Edward nods at her, both of them smiling slightly. "What's up, Jasper, Edward." She greets them, nodding her head before turning to my sister. "Rosalie," she says with a small smile, which Rose returns with a nod. "Hi, Bella."

"Carlisle, Esme, it's nice to see you again," Bella greets them, perfectly polite although I'm not so sure that they deserve it. I'm not sure what kind of reaction I expected them to have, but this wasn't it. Dad frowned slightly and nodded. Mom wasn't much better. "Bella," she said evenly, making no other comment. A silence settled over the room and I decided to break it.

"Bella, we were just about to eat dinner. You'll stay, won't you?" I asked her and she half-smiled. "Of course. As long as it's okay with your parents," she said, and I turned to them with a pleading expression. Mom sighed. "Of course. Go and sit at the table, everyone, and I'll bring the food out of the kitchen," she said, walking off. I frowned as everyone else got and began to head towards the dining room.

Bella glanced down at me questioningly and I shrugged. "I don't know, but come on," I murmured and we followed after everyone, taking seats next to each other on the far side of the table from where Dad sat at the head of the table.

I was looking towards the entrance to the kitchen when I felt Bella reach over and take my hand in hers over the table. I was going to turn my head and smile at her when I caught Dad's glare out of the corner of my eye. I frowned. What was going on with my parents tonight?

I shook my head. I was going to say something but then Mom walked in and I didn't have chance. After that, things passed normally for the most part, although neither Mom nor Dad said a word to Bella the whole time.

Then, Bella yawned. Now, usually this wouldn't be a big deal – and it wasn't. It was Dad's reaction that made it into a big deal.

"You okay?" I asked and she smiled tiredly at me and shook her head. "I'm fine. I just haven't been sleeping much." she said. I was going to respond but Dad beat me to it. "Then maybe you shouldn't be staying out so late. A nice night _alone _in your own bed can do wonders for your sleeping pattern," he said coldly and I stared at him openmouthed, shocked. Did he just basically call my girlfriend a slut and a cheater?

As the shock wore off, anger rushed through me. "What gives you the right to say something like that?" I asked sharply and saw the surprise in his gaze. I was going to continue but Bella reached over grabbed my hand. "Don't," she said quietly. "Relax. It's fine. I appreciate your opinion, Carlisle, and I'll keep it in mind," she said, inclining her head slightly although her eyes were guarded, watchful. Dad nodded, his gaze still cold. Let's just say that there wasn't very much conversation after that.

Once we were finished with dinner, my siblings all disappeared upstairs. I was about to pull Bella up the stairs and to my room when I heard Mom call my name from behind me. "Yes?" I asked, turning around to see both Mom and Dad standing there. They shared a glance. "We'd like to speak with the two of you if you don't mind," she said, although it was clearly not a request, not bothering to wait for a reply as the two of them turned and walked towards the office. Shit.

I glanced up at Bella as we followed them and she gave me a small smile although her eyes were vigilant. "It'll be fine," she murmured and I sighed. Well, there was nothing that we could do but see what they wanted.

We followed Mom and Dad into the office and sat in the two chairs in front of the desk while Dad sat behind the desk and Mom stood behind his chair. "So, what did you want to talk about?" I asked, glancing between them. Dad's eyes hardened. "Are you sure that there's nothing that you'd like to speak with _us_ about?" he asked evenly and I frowned in confusion. "No," I said, still wondering what they could possibly mean.

Mom laughed then; it wasn't her usual warm, carefree laugh. Now, it was cold and humorless. "So, it never occurred to you to tell your own parents that you're _engaged_?" she asked sternly. Oh, _shit._ My eyes widened and my hand flew to the center of my chest where, beneath my shirt, my ring hung on its chain. Of course, Mom and Dad caught my movement and at the very least guessed at why I had done it when they noticed the chain around my neck. "Take off your necklace, Alice," Dad told me.

I opened my mouth – to deny everything, to confirm it, to apologize. I don't know what I would have done, but Bella interrupted me. "It's alright, Alice," she said softly but I still didn't move, so she stood and moved behind my chair. I felt her unclasp my necklace and pull it from around my neck, revealing the beautiful ring that hung from it. Dad clenched his jaw and Mom closed her eyes, taking a deep breath.

"So it's true," Mom demanded and again I was speechless. But thankfully Bella wasn't. "Yes, it is true. I proposed to Alice when we were in France and she accepted," she said calmly, moving to stand next to my chair and take my hand in hers. I took a deep breath. She was right. It would be okay, as long as I had her next to me.

Dad snapped then. "What do you think you're doing proposing to my daughter?! And you, young lady, what do think you're doing accepting?! You're seventeen for God's sake!" he thundered. Wow. I've never really seen him lose his cool like this and I can't say that I like it. Still, I couldn't stop the instinctive anger that rushed through my body. "Yes, we're eighteen but it's not like we're getting married tomorrow!" I said exasperatedly and Mom stepped in then as Dad was too busy glaring at Bella.

"Alice, be reasonable. You're young and you may think that you truly love her, but you can't possibly really be ready to spend the rest of your life with this girl!" she exclaimed and I clenched my jaw shut. "What do you mean "this girl?" I growled out. "I happen to love this girl and I will marry her, with or without your permission," I snapped and her eyes widened before narrowing. "You say that you love her, but does she love you?" she demanded. "I know all about her reputation and the way that she's treated the people that she's been with in the past. She didn't love them. What makes you think that she loves you?!" she exclaimed and my jaw literally dropped.

Bella was about to step in and say something, but I barely noticed. "Of course she loves me! And you don't know anything about her past! Neither of you do! Not even my own siblings do! And do you know why? Because you won't give her a chance!" I yelled and Dad placed a hand on Mom's back. "Alice, she's clearly a bad influence on you. You're yelling at us, fighting with your siblings, you're hardly ever home anymore, we know you've been smoking more, you've been drinking, and…" he trailed off furiously. My eyes narrowed. "And what?" I retorted. "And I wasn't exactly thrilled to see my daughter's girlfriend sneaking out of the house at 5 o'clock in the morning!" he snapped and I paled. Shit.

"Alice, we think that it's best if you and Bella take some time apart," Mom said sternly. "What?!" I demanded. "No, absolutely not! You can't make me break up with her! I love her and you're just gonna have to deal with it!" I snapped, turning to Bella whose expression was troubled. I took the chain from her hands and pulled the ring off of it, slipping the chain into my pocket and placing the ring in her hand. "Bella, would you?" I asked, holding out my left hand. She smiled softly, though her eyes contained sadness. "Of course," she murmured, slipping the ring onto the third finger of my left hand and turning to face my parents.

"Mr. and Mrs. Cullen, I'm fully aware that my past is nothing to be proud of – more than even you know – but I want you to understand something. I do love your daughter. I love Alice, and I always will. I would do anything for her, and all I want is for her to be happy. And I understand that you must be extremely angry and upset that we didn't inform you when this happened, and I apologize for that. But I will not apologize for proposing to Alice because I meant every word that I said when I did. We don't plan on getting married any time soon. We are young and there's no reason for us to rush into the actual ceremony. This ring is a symbol of how much I love your daughter, and how I will continue to love her for the rest of my life. And I hope that, in time, you can come to understand that," she finished, and I was in awe. "Thank you," I whispered and she half-smiled at me.

Dad looks at her suddenly calm. "You say you would do anything for our daughter… what if that meant you had to be out of the picture? Are you that selfless as to give our daughter the freedom she needs, to find herself? She is obviously losing her respect for family and you – having none - cannot offer her that." He says. I glance at my dad with wide eyes.

"Dad, that was totally out of line!" I say and I look to my side to see Bella frowning. Her eyes looking vacant. "Sir, I assume you are aware that it is not my fault that both my parents are dead." She snaps politely. Dad looks shocked for a moment but Bella continues to answer him. "And if that were the case sir, I would. If Alice were to tell me to leave, I would." she says.

I shake my head. "Never going to happen." I say to dad. He sighs. "Alice I think you should see other people and then, if your feelings for Bella haven't changed then we will manage." He says.

Bella shifts in her chair and looks at him. "If I may ask, why is it that you took such a disliking to me, sir?" Bella asks. Dad frowns. "It's nothing against you, Bella." He says. Bella chuckles. "Then, why is it that you hate your daughter?" she asks. Dad and Moms face goes blank.

"We do not hate our daughter." Mom says. Bella frowns. "You know... I never had a family. Not really and now, seeing yours, I'm actually a bit happy I didn't. I mean, all I've seen since the beginning is that your family is hostile and spiteful. Especially to a stranger. Then, I don't know what I did to earn that. Maybe it was my past, or the way I acted. But… If this is the way a family acts… I have no interest of being accepted into or a part of your family sir." She says.

"Ever since the beginning, all I have done is be nice to your family. I protected Alice when she was being bullied. I accepted your children into my close knit group of friends and now this is how, you all act? Sir, I don't know what throne and crown you threw over your head but I think it's time you step back in to reality. And that reality is that I love your daughter. And she loves me. And that even if you think I am hurting her, in reality it is you who is." Bella says.

I stare at her in shock and pride, I cannot believe Bella just said that to my dad. "I will not stand here and be insulted in my house." Dad says sternly. Bella raises an eyebrow. "I don't think, it show's great leadership to insult a guest, a guest that has done nothing but-" dad cuts her off.

"You have defiled my daughter! She's changed since she met you! She is not the same person she once was and there is only you to blame for that!" he yells. Bella frowns and I can see the pain in her eyes. Oh, shit. I know that Bella already believes all of this stuff, and he's just going to make it worse. Damn it!

"It's all your fault! You are nothing but a menace to her, and if the two of you stay together you are going to destroy my daughter! You're going to ruin her!" he roars. Bella has been shaking her head slowly while he's been speaking (yelling) but I can see it in her eyes – she believes him. She truly believes that she's not good for me; she always has. And this is just reinforcing it all. No, Bella, please don't… But I know she will.

Dad's about to start screaming again but Bella interrupts him. "You're right…" she trails off, clenching her jaw and breathing deeply through her nose. Both Mom and Dad stop short in amazed anger and suspicion. "What?" Mom asked incredulously. No doubt she expected Bella to yell and scream right back.

"I said that you're right. Both of you. I'm not good enough for your daughter; I never have been. And it is entirely my fault… And I refuse to put you through this anymore," she says softly, turning to face me. "Bella…" I whisper, shaking my head. "Don't…" I say and she frowns. "I'm sorry, Alice, but I won't continue to hurt you this way. Look at what I've done. I made you fight with your siblings over me. I made you fight with your parents over me. I changed you. You were so good and pure and perfect when you first came here, and I took you and I've been breaking you, slowly," she said and although her voice was low, even – I could see the pain and guilt and self-hatred in her eyes. I opened my mouth to speak but she beat me to it.

"I won't do it anymore. I'm sorry, Alice, but I can't. Goodbye, beautiful," she gives me a small half-smile and walks toward the door before turning back to face my parents once more. "And you don't have to worry. I won't come back. I promise you that," she said quietly. And she turned around, walked out the door, and she was gone.

I stared after her, frozen in shock. Damn it, Bella… I clenched my jaw shut. I felt a hand on my shoulder and quickly took a step away, turning to see Mom standing there with a sympathetic expression on her face. "I know that it hurts, honey, but it's for the best," she says and my jaw drops. "For the best?" I demand. "The love of my life just walked away from me and you think it's for the best?!" I yell before I laugh humorlessly. "And you know what? You just hit on almost every single one of her fears about this relationship. She's always thought that she didn't deserve me; that she was bad for me; that she was going to do something to screw me up. And you just threw all of that in her face!" I yell and they seem somewhat surprised by my words. Out of the corner of my eye, I see my siblings standing there but I'm too upset to care. "This is all your fault and I hate you! I hate you more than I've ever hated anyone! And I can't wait to go to college just so that I never have see your disgusting, selfish; judgmental faces ever again! I will never forgive you for this!" I yell, turning and running from the room, ignoring the hands of my siblings as they reach out to me.

I make it to my room and slam the door shut, locking it before I go and lay down on my bed. I grab one of my pillows and hug it tightly to my chest as a few tears slip down my cheeks. Oh, Bella… Why did you have to believe him? I pleaded with her silently.

I lay there quietly, tears falling from my eyes every so often, for a long while before I shook my head and sat up, drying my tears as I did so. I frowned. No. I wasn't just going to accept this. They wanted me and Bella to break up? Well, we did. But now they were going to have to deal with the consequences of that decision. Let's see how much they still hate Bella if they have to deal with Kate instead…

**Bpov**

I slam the front door as I walk into my house. I'm numb as I walk up the stairs and into my room. I can't believe what I just did… Except that I can. Because it was the right thing to do. I knew that Carlisle was right. I've just been kidding myself trying to stay with Alice.

I was right all along. I'm not good enough for her. I'm destructive; I've been destroying her. She's not innocent anymore and it's because of me. It's all my fault. I ruined her.

But not anymore. Because I just broke up with her. I broke up with my angel and now she probably hates me… That's good. She should hate me – I hate myself.

The numbness is starting to fade now, and I can feel the pain. It's everywhere. It starts in my chest and just radiates throughout my entire fucking body. I grit my teeth and shut my eyes tightly. It hurts… It hurts so fucking bad and I can't stand it. I feel myself slipping back into the deep, dark place that I was in before I met her. Before… Alice…

The pain intensifies when I think her name and I flinch. I shake my head. I can't deal with this. I need something. Where the hell is it? I search frantically through my room, the pain continuing to burn me from the inside out, until I finally find what I was searching for. I pull out the blow and it's not long before I'm sniffing it up.

I sigh. Damn it. I always knew that I wasn't good enough for her. Oh, god, the pain is still there… I can't do this. I can't just keep holding onto her like this. I need to let her go… I think for a moment before I smirk bitterly to myself.

I pull out my phone and dial a number that I hadn't thought that I would ever need. It rings once… twice… three times. "Hello?" A familiar voice on the other side of the line greets me and I run a hand through my hair as I sigh. "Tina, it's me, Bella. What would it take to get you to come over tonight?" i ask my voice sounding dead to my ears, but i know to hers it would sound like velvet.

"Bella? to be hones, i didn't think i would ever hear from you again and me going over there, depends on what you can do for me." she says. I feel my darker side smile "I can make it worth your wild. But, i don't like to wait too long, patience is a virtue i was born without." i say as the predator in me smiles wickedly.

"Well, then. Lucky for you, im in town. I dont think it would be to hard to slip out of the campsite for a bit and meet you." she says. I smirk "Who said it was just for a bit, its going to be a long night. And just take your first right after the highway. Its marked with a white line, hard to miss. Ill see you soon." i say and after she agrees i hang up.

I close my eyes as I ignore the pain, i cant think. Blow, sex and drinking. That is the perfect mix to get my pain away from me. I can let the pain run me, i promised my self a few months. In that time, i need to make sure Alice hates me enough that she wont feel guilty about my death. Yes, im going to kill my self... but first.

I need to make my self forget. I need to make my self forget i ever opened my heart, and forget that it was shattered. I stay in a trance like state, sniffing blow and drinking untill i hear a knock on my door. I walk down to the front and open it to see Tina. Her eyes go wide when she seems me.

"Bella, that you?" she asks. I wind my arm around her waist and pull her close to me and smirk down at her "Who else would it be?" i ask tilting my head to the side. Tina smirks to her self and slowly runs a hand threw my hair I suppress a shudder at the unfamiliar touch. I don't like it, but i need it. We walk, bodies pressed together in to the house and i shut the door.

"What happened? I though you were in love?" she asks. I hold back a grimace and shake my head "I don't, want to talk about it." i say lowly. She nods once and runs a hand threw my hair again "I like the change, its... refreshing." she mumbles and i feel her lean closer and start to place kisses along my neck.

I stretch my neck up, letting her kiss up, the lips feel wrong on my body, but i push the thought away. Once she reaches my ear she bites softly "What do you want me to do?" she asks. Her hot breath fans across my neck I shudder and pull her closer and kiss her neck and trail my way up until my lips brush against hers "Make me forget." i say softly.

I feel her smile against my lips "Deal." she whispers and just like that something in me snaps I kiss her with a deep hunger, the monster in me being unleashed after a long, long hibernation. I pin her against the wall and she pushes me back and i take two steps. She smirks and walks to the living room "Show me what you got." she says and i smirk.

"Oh, ill show you." i growl out slowly as i take my shirt off as i make my way to the living room.

_**A/N: Here it is, it happened. Hey, if it makes you feel better they didnt break up because of the wicked bitches of the west. :) clever right? lol. REVIEW!**_


	52. Chapter 52

**A/N: Lol, wow. Lot of angry responses and some that were cool. Relax, I have a reason for what I do. Trust me? Good. **

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**

**Thanks to my Beta, A Thousand Undiscovered Stars! For helping me out. **

**Ch.52**

**Bpov**

Alice… Alice…. Alice… her spiky black hair… soft white skin… hypnotic hazel eyes…. pixie-like features…. Alice… Alice… her soft magical voice… her tinkling laugh… her soft lips…. Alice…. Alice… Alice…. Her name is like a jinx on my lips. A mantra I couldn't live without repeating at least a hundred times a day.

A tape recorder, stuck on that one word. How many times would you have to fight until you just couldn't? No one, in this life knows how much I wanted to stand up and fight for Alice.

No one will ever know how I wanted to yell and scream at him that he was wrong about me. That I did love his daughter, that I would respect her, that I could offer her anything and everything this world had to offer but… I couldn't.

If I were to stand and tell her father that I love her and I wouldn't let her go… it would just reflect badly on Alice. I didn't want her to see me disrespect her parents. I didn't want her to fight with them over me. I was tired of fighting. I have fought all my life, so I'm not surprised that I just didn't have any fight left in me.

I could have stood there and told him why I was better for his daughter, but once he threw in my face what I didn't have to offer to her… once he told me that I was ruining her, that I would break her… how could I fight with the one thing that I had known since the very beginning?

I have always been wary of Alice's family situations… but I knew I had caused them. So, when her father stood and yelled at me that it was indeed my fault… I couldn't do it. I couldn't put Alice through it again. I wanted Alice to have a calm and easy life. I wanted her to have the love of a family, something like Carlisle, something that I couldn't offer her. I didn't have a family, so how could I show her what respect and family love was like. Sure, she had hers but: they hated me, they hated everything about me.

I didn't want to make Alice have to choose between me and her family again and again. That wasn't healthy for her; she shouldn't have to choose. And… it was my fault. So, could anyone really blame me for what I had done?

I still love Alice… and that's exactly why I did it. That is the exact reason why, I chose to just end it there, when it wouldn't hurt her as much as I had dragged it along more. So and I can guarantee this, Alice could hate me all she wanted… and she still wouldn't hate me as much as I hate myself. For, I just gave away my heart and gave away my life. For, my life didn't really have any meaning if Alice wasn't a part of it. What did I have to live for? Nothing…

A company that was making improvement?... An uncle who had a life in Italy?... Friends that would probably be better off if I left?... I had nothing, and that was a scary and heart-clenching though.

Because it was true. I had nothing! Nothing at all and Alice was the only thing that brought some kind of… happiness to my life. She gave me everything and anything. But I had learned that…

When life offers you a dream so far beyond any of your expectations, it's not reasonable to grieve when it comes to an end. And that's partly why, I am currently getting too wasted to even think straight. I don't want to grieve, because I deserve every ounce of searing pain running threw me.

I deserve everything I am feeling. And I'll accept it, it's the only thing that makes me feel alive in the slightest. I chuckle to myself as I lift the cup of "Coffee" to my lips as I lean against the rearview mirror, I am currently sitting on my car trunk looking at the people walk through and around.

It's been one week, one excruciating week since I broke my heart. But I comfort myself with the thought that Alice… Alice still has a chance to live a good life. One without me. I had been a wall this week. I hadn't showed up, I couldn't drag myself out of the bed long enough. I can feel that I'm skinnier. Unhealthier so, but… I can't hold down food. It's like the world has decided to kill me of starvation before letting me do the job.

All I can keep down, is blow and alcohol. So, that's what's been sustaining me all week. Blow, and Vodka. Vodka and Blow. Weed and vodka. Vodka and weed. Nothing else from that could I stand to have in my body. It was pathetic really, but I didn't care.

I see a silver car pull up, a silver car I know so well. I let my eyes fallow the car behind my glasses until it's parked across the lot and next to it, goes the red BMW that does not disappoint. I lift my leg up and lean my hand with my cig on that leg as I slouch against the glass. Normally, I would flip at the idea of scratching my baby but… I didn't care.

It was just a car, I could just fucking crash it. There are millions of these cars. I can just buy a new one. I bring the cig back to my lips and let the smoke fill my lungs. I hold it in until I see the Cullen's walking out of their cars. They all stop and send a glance at me. They all freeze.

I hold in a laugh as I blow the smoke out, what? They expected me to leave town? I wanted to, but how could I make sure Alice was safe if I did that? No, I wouldn't leave town. Not this town, not my parents. It had dawned on me that everything that meant anything to me was in this town, and I couldn't leave it. Not yet anyway. I suppress a whimper when I see Alice push past her siblings and stare at me. I lift my one hand and send a salute to her. I don't know what I did, but that got me a glare from her and she marches over.

I lean my head back, I don't want to fight with her. But… I guess she has to get it out of her system right? Hell, at least I get to hear her voice right? I slide down the trunk of my car and stand there, almost falling over. Shit, I really am fucked up. As soon as Alice is in front of me she throw's my glasses off my face and to the ground.

I blink slowly at the light until my vision isn't blurry. I look down at her. "What is it Alice?" I ask my voice, raspy. Like I've been sleeping forever only… I can't sleep, I have the bags under my eyes to prove it.

Alice stares at me for a long moment before she pushes me hard and I hit the back of my car. I sigh and run a hand threw my hair and look down at her. "What?" I ask again and she pushes me again. I take a deep breath and straighten up and look down at her I can't help the small smirk that crosses my face. "What?" I ask again and when she goes to push me I hold her arms, sure I'm not as strong as I normally am and I'm skinny as fuck. But still, I'm strong.

She struggles against my arms. "Let me go." She growls out. I sigh. "Why? You want to hit me? Fine." I say and let go of her hands. "Hit me." I say with a shrug and lean down to give her perfect view of my face. She glares at me before pulling her hand back and punching me in the jaw. I stumble a step, shit, I forgot how strong my girl… I mean Alice is.

I straighten up and look at her again. "Hit me." I challenge again and she pulls back her hand and slaps me. Fuck, that stings… but her skin is still like satin. So soft… I wince, and rub my jaw before chuckling softly and she starts to punch against my chest and slapping me.

I close my eyes and hold it, I withstand it until I feel her off me and when I open my eyes I see Emmett holding Alice back. I try to hold back a laugh. "Got it out of your system?" I ask her. I see Alice pant, poor girl. Probably gave it all she's got.

What I didn't expect was what happened next. Rosalie grabs me by the collar of my shirt and starts to punch me. I hold back my instincts and let her pound on my face until I feel my eyebrow and lip bleed and then I roll us, just as we fall. I roll us around and I pin her hands over her head.

"I'm going to kill you, you son of a bitch! You swore to me you wouldn't play Alice! You fucking liar, you no good, mother fucker!" Rosalie growls. I shake my head and stand up only to be tripped by Rosalie and fall face first in the gravel. I cough a few times when she lands a kick on my ribs and I roll on the ground groaning.

I see Rosalie hover over me and I take a deep breath. "If you knew…" I mutter. I take a deep breath, shit, I think she cracked a rib. I cough a few times and roll again until I'm on my hands and knees.

I spit at the ground, blood. Just great, she split my lip better then I though. I wince as I stand up on swaying feet. I shake my head and run a hand threw my hair and lean my arms on my knees as I take a breath. "If I knew what?" she yells at me. I look from under my bangs at the parking lot.

The students are surrounding us in shock, I stretch up and hold back a wince. I walk over to Rosalie and glare down at her. "If you only knew why the fuck I did it." I spit at her. She pushes me back once more "Why?" she asks. I smirk. "Why don't you ask your fucked up father?" I say and she punches me once more.

I hold my eyebrow with my fingers and look down at my hand, blood. Shit, does this girl have a ring on or something? I look up at her hand to see... Yup, rings. No wonder. I sigh and straighten up again. "Hit me one more time and I will beat the shit out of you Barbie." I growl out.

I shake off my pain and stand up. "What does my dad have to do with anything?" she asks. I look over Rosalie's shoulder and look at Alice. "Because he was right." I say and I see Alice close her eyes and shake her head.

She shrugs out of Emmett's grasp and walks over to me and pushes me. I hold in my anger, I really hate being pushed around "That's bullshit Bella." She says. I smirk. "If it was bull shit, why didn't you say something about it?" I ask and her face goes blank. "It's your family Alice, not mine. You have more of a say in it then I did. Why did I have to speak up when my own girlfriend didn't? He's right and you know he is. So I don't know what the big-" I'm cut off when Alice punches me so hard I land on my back, hitting my head against the floor.

My head swims but I don't bother standing up. I struggle to sit up and once I do I see the pack trying to lift me up. Jake and Seth grab one arm each and pull me up. Leah is glaring at Alice and I hold her arm. "Leave her alone." I say and Leah looks at me, shocked.

"I didn't speak up because I didn't know you would be so stupid as to believe him!" she yells. I smirk. "Stupid… you think that was stupid… don't you bullshit me Mary Alice. I couldn't fight anymore because I know it was true. You knew it was true, so why don't you stop this fucking unnecessary drama." I say and shrug out of the guys arms.

"Hit me all the fuck you want but not even you can hurt me as much as I've hurt myself. Do it, I'll stand here all day and accept every punch you throw at me. Go for it, I fucking dare you to hit me one more time." I say and look down at her.

She stops to look at me and her face slowly gets over the anger and she looks so hurt and lost. "Bella… what are you doing to me?" she asks. I lick my lips and taste blood, shit. Blondie really did do a number on me. "What… what am I doing to you?... I'm making sure you don't make a big mistake. One your family members all see you making. So why don't you grow up and finally see that I am not the person you think I am. The world isn't all sunshine and daisy's and I'm not some toy you can fix. I'm a fucked up person who loves to make these big nets and get everybody caught in them so that they can hurt just a little compared to the hurt I have felt my entire life. The only difference is that your family cut you out of my net just in time to spare you." I say lowly to her.

The hidden fury in my voice giving me a dark undertone. "I didn't need to be spared." She says back and I shake my head a bitter and dark laugh coating my tone. "Yes, yes you did. Before I seriously hurt you. Be thankful it ended like this and it didn't end with you catching me in bed with some slut." I say and Alice slaps me again.

"Fuck you!" she yells at me and I shake my head and run a hand through my hair. "Yeah, you're right. Fuck me." I say and turn my back on her as I grab my book bag from the floor and throw it in the car. I jump over the door (thank God for convertibles) and land in my seat. I start the engine and pull the car out, I growl when Alice steps in the way of my car.

"Get out of the way, Mary Alice!" I yell. "No, Isabella. Not until you grow some balls and tell me why you believed him." She growls and I wince at my full name, kinda walked in to that one. I pull my door open and walk up to her I grab her by the arms and pull her out of the way.

"What do you want from me? What do I have to give you? Fuck it Alice I have nothing! Left to give!" I yell at her. She grabs my head and pulls me to her and we kiss. I stiffen and try to pull away from her. "Don't.." I growl out and she pulls me closer to her. I feel my shoulders shake as I pull her closer to me.

I kiss her with a hunger, but I know. I know this is the last kiss I will ever give the love of my life. It's the last kiss I will ever give Alice and it kills me. I break the kiss and pull away from her and wipe my eyes.

I feel myself falling in to that deep abyss. I feel my mind start to go blank and I look down at Alice one more time. I shake my head. "I… I have nothing left." I say so low I think she missed it. She looks in my eyes and something she sees in them makes her take a step back from me.

I take a step closer and cup her face in my hands and speak lowly and softly… I don't have any more energy. "Be happy for me… can you do that?" I ask and I see her shake her head and tears fall down her eyes. I pull her to me and hold back a sob but I can't stop my shoulders from shaking as I feel her hug me back.

"No, Bella. I love you, please. Please don't do this." She whispers and I hug her tighter to me. I hold back my tears and shake my head. "I can't keep fighting a war that has already been lost. Alice, I'm a lost cause… I love you, more than life its self. And that is exactly why I am letting you go. I want you to be happy and safe and… you can't have that with me." I say softly and disentangle myself from her.

I hold her at arm's length. "You're just scared." Alice says softly. I shake my head and she cups my face. "You're scared that I'm going to hurt you. I'm not going to hurt you Bella." She says. I shake my head and pull away from her. "There's nothing left to hurt." I say and walk to my car.

I take a deep painful breath. "Avreteil mio cuore, Alice. Fino a quando hofermare il suobattito." I promise her.

Never have I spoken truer words. _You will have my heart, Alice. Until i stop its beating_. I promise her in Italian. She's not good with languages so she won't figure it out. I know she won't, but it makes me feel so much better that I did promise her something.

She looks at me confused and I pull my car out and not giving her another glance. I cant. It would shatter me and with that, I speed down the road and go to my house. There I slam my door shut and let my sobs and cries of pain escape me. I smash everything I can get my hands on and after I cried all my tears I slowly make my way up to my study.

I sit there and look at the picture there. Me and Alice in the meadow. I close my eyes and turn to the safe. "Life can't get worse. Let's see what curve ball it can throw me." I say darkly as I open the safe and grab the letter. I rip it open…

**A/N: Better? Did I get some degree of forgiveness for this? Cliff hanger? Letter? Anything… Review so I know that you guys don't still hate me and are a step closer to forgive me. PS. In the story, summer vacation is right on the border. **


	53. Chapter 53

_**A/N: Here is the next update! Loved your guy's reviews. Oh, and read my friends story! The Eighth Cullen by Dyl-Kat7394 it's awesome! It's a cool story, I liked it. Check it out? Plz? For me? yeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii to all of you who said yes! xD and lol.**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**_

_**Ch.53**_

_**Apov**_

I watch Bella speed off and I swear, I think she just took my heart with her. I close my eyes tightly as I feel a wave of pain crash against me. She's right and it kills me. I should have stood up and fought for her, I should have known how she was feeling.

I sigh and let my shoulders slump as I put my balled fists to my eyes to push back the tears. I hear yelling behind me and when I turn around I see Leah yelling at Rosalie who is glaring back.

I dash forward as soon as I see Leah lift her fist and I grab her arm. "Don't. Don't hit her. It's my fault." I say quickly as I... pretty much dangle from her arm. Why does everyone have to be so freaking tall! I mean really? Do we **need **tall people outside of the NBA?... No. That's what ladders are for.

Leah shrugs me off her. "Don't touch me, I can't believe what your family did to her. Did… did you fucking see her? She's out of her fucking mind! She's drunk and drugged and hasn't eaten anything in a week. She's miserable and you find the need and feel the urge to beat her up? You're lucky I don't do it to you all. Just stay away from Bella, all of you." Leah says before shaking her head and walking over to her bike and getting on.

"Jake, keep Seth in check. I'm going to make sure Bella doesn't do anything stupid." She says not sparing a glance at me as she speeds down. Jake sighs and Seth frowns. "Let's go, Jake. Nothing left to do here." Seth says and turns to walk.

I take a step forward. "Seth." I call and he turns to look at me. "Yeah?" he asks. "Is… is she ok?" I ask. He sighs and runs a hand threw his short black hair. "No, she's not. But, I think she'll get there. You have to understand something when it comes to Bella." He says and his voice gets a bit sharp which surprises me.

Seth is an all-around good kid, but it doesn't surprise me that he in a way looks up to Bella. "Bella has walls up for a reason, ok? You guy's see Bella and you think that nothing will ever hurt her and that nothing bothers her. I know that Alice knows differently but I think it's you all who need a wakeup call." He says and looks at my family.

"Bella has been hurt more than any of you can ever imagine. She's not a person to lie, why would she? She's never asked for anything her whole life. She lost her mom at ten; she was forced to grow up at ten. Her dad didn't take care of her. He was an angry drunk after the war. His life was drinking and business. He didn't raise Bella at all, yet that girl loves him more than life itself. She's been betrayed in the worst possible way any of you can ever imagine and by the one person she would have never thought would betray her like that. She's been so damn hurt and you have the guts… you all have the guts to act like she wronged you? You're all seriously messed up. She's been nothing but nice to all of you. She loves Alice. Yet all of you are so… so stupid, so pig headed and paranoid that you never stopped to try and get to know her. And now… now I know. None of you deserve to get to know her! She's a great person - a fierce protector and one loyal friend. She is one of the most caring people around. Sure she has walls but if you guys bothered to knock out a few bricks you would have seen why. But, now… it's**me** that doesn't want any of you anywhere **near her.**" Seth says before grabbing his back pack and lifting it to his shoulder.

"Come on, Jake. We're late. We need to leave at lunch to go see Bella." He says and walks over to the school and gets in. I stand there shocked for a second before I feel it. That nagging feeling coming over the back of my head all the way forward.

Numbness, I always heard Bella talk about it. Describe it until she felt uncomfortable and changed to topic.

_Flashback_

_I snuggle into Bella's neck and I feel her strong arms wrap around me. She's no weight lifter but she's strong enough to make me feel safe. I sigh happily and click my tongue. "What does it feel like?" I ask softly._

_Bella runs a hand down my spine and kisses the top of my head. "What does what feel like?" she asks. I lift my head up a bit. "Being numb. You told me that you feel numb sometimes… what does it feel like?" I ask as I slide off her and on to the bed, next to her._

_She frowns for a long moment. "Oh, um… why do you want to know?" she asks me. I shrug and run a hand threw her long brown hair and shrug. "Not sure, I just… I want to know what you feel, why… I want to know everything there is about you." I say with a small smile. Bella smiles softly at me and chuckles. "Alright then, I'll tell you. It's not necessarily a good feeling but, it's… it's an out of body feeling." She says and licks her lips and gets a faraway look in her eyes._

"_It's like when you get a head cold, or a soft head ache. You feel the pressure in your brain and the nagging feeling but it doesn't hurt per-se. It's just… at the moment, you're going to be grateful that your mind shuts off the emotions. You just don't feel anything. It's like your whole body acts on its own and you're just in there, hidden in your brain looking out your eyes. It's scary but… for me, it's just a way to cope with some stressful thoughts. I prefer to feel numbness rather than pain. I always have... Now… why exactly are you asking me about this while we were just about to have sex?" she asks me with a smirk and glint in her eyes._

_I slap her shoulder and chuckle and peck her lips. "Nice try, but I need to head on home." I say with a smirk as I roll out of the bed. I feel her arms wrap around my waist and pull me back to her._

_Her lips at my ear. "Who said I was going to let you go?" she asks and starts to trail kisses down my neck. Mmmmm… five more minutes won't kill me right?... Pfft, who am I kidding. Knowing Bella, I'll be here for an hour. Maybe more, if she's not tired._

_End Flashback._

I hold back the tears as I finally know what it feels like. Numb, and in a way, I am grateful. I don't want to feel pain or hate… I don't want to feel anything. I grab my backpack from Edward's hand and walk into the school. I ignore everyone for the rest of the day, and at home. When I'm finally alone in my room, I close my door and walk to my balcony.

I curl up there and cry. I don't eat, why would I? I don't feel hunger, just pain. I don't sleep, why would I? It's not like it can take away my emotions. It's not like I can wake up from the nightmare that is my life. I hear someone call my name a few times from the door but after I don't answer, they use they key dad has in his office to open it.

I look up to see Mom and Dad looking at me. I don't spare them another glance as I look back to the woods. "Alice, what are you doing?" mom asks. I ignore her, I have nothing left to say. Hell, the last words I spoke to her were that I hated her and dad. Why would I take that back? It's true, it doesn't take away from the fact that if it weren't for my father's comment I would still have a girlfriend – a fiancée. God why didn't I fight for her…

"Alice, pay attention when your mother speaks to you." Dad says. I suppress an eye roll and just look blankly at the sky. I don't even give them the offer of shrugging, I feel a hand on my shoulder and I do look this time. I look to see Mom kneeling down next to me. "Alice… what is troubling you?" Mom asks.

I snort. "Why do you care? What? If I get too happy, God forbid, you'll just take it away right? It's good to know that Edward is the favorite twin and I'm the stupid ugly duck in the house." I mutter as I stand up and away from them. "Your mother and I love you all the same." Dad says. I laugh. "Sure you do, ok then. Let's see the facts, Carlisle. Em and Rose, together. Jazz and Edward, together. Me? I'm alone. But oh, I have my wonderful family to thank for that right? Should I bow down and write a song to show you my happiness?" I ask them.

Mom's stare hardens. "Don't use that tone with us." She says. I smirk. "Why? What do I have left to lose to you two? Want to take my laptop? Here, I'll give it to you." I say and grab it from the bed and hold it out. They just stare at it and I throw it back to the bed.

"No, of course not. Hmm, let me see. What in this room would make Alice happy so I can get rid of it right? That's what you ask yourselves in the morning right when you wake up." I say ignoring my family as I go to my desk and grab my sketches.

"Here, now this. This really does make me happy. This, you can have. I mean, who needs to be happy right? Not with a family like mine. No, happiness goes straight out the window." I snap and throw the sketch book on the bed. "No? Not that either? Damn, you guys are hard to make happy." I mutter sarcastically as I look around my room.

"What are you doing Alice?" my mom asks. "I don't know. Maybe... Ok. Now I have a good idea." I say with a smirk as I walk out of my room and go to the living room. As suspected, everything that I want is there. It's good to know I get things my way this time.

I grab dad's phone and mom's favorite book. I turn and wait until they enter. "Ok, so. It's a kind of game we play in this house. Take what makes the other most happy and get rid of it right? So, I have these two and if I do this." I say and throw them in the fire place, which was on (score for the Gods!). "Alice!" my parents yell and I walk around the coffee table.

"And if I do this." I say and grab Rose's camera and take the chip out and smash the camera and the floor. "And this." I say and throw Emmett's third-fave game (he did like Bella the most) in the fire. I grab jaspers MP3 and stomp on it on the ground and I see Edward silver book. I hold it in my hands.

"Alice, what has gotten in to you!?" my parents yell as I ignore them and flip through the stupid book. I gave this to Edward when we were ten… I bite my lip as I hear the rest of the family make their way in to the living room.

"Alice, what the hell! That's mine!" Edward yells as he launches forward but I jump out of his way and stand next to the fire place. "What? We're playing the 'let's take the thing you most love and kill it right? So, it's my turn!" I say to them. Sure, I may be going a bit insane and being a bit to dramatic but, I'm getting my point through to them TODAY.

"Dad loves his phone - that goes in the fire. Mom loves that book, it goes in the fire. Em likes that game; it goes in the fire. Rose loves the camera; I smash it. Jazz loves the music; I break it. What? Be lucky I don't just break all of you up so that you can feel an ounce! A damn ounce of what I'm feeling right now! Be happy I still like you all enough to spare you guys from the pain you make me feel every single day for the past week!" I say to them and look at Edward.

"Why did you keep this?" I ask him. He frowns. "You gave it to me, why wouldn't I?" he asks. I bite my lip to hide my mad smirk. Fury, pure fury is all I feel right now. "You need to realize this, all of you right now. I lose Bella, correction. You throw Bella away, you throw me away. You all are nothing to me but house-mates. You undermine my feelings? Undermine my relationship but expect me to accept all of yours? No, it's a two way street… and I'm tired of being the nice girl." I say and throw Eddies notebook in the fire.

"Alice!" Edward yells and I walk out of the way. "What kind of a sister are you?" he asks. I smirk and run a hand threw my hair as I shrug. "I'm no one's sister, not in this house. You made sure to do this to me, now I'm just showing you exactly what you did." I say as I walk out of the living room, leaving my shocked family behind me.

"Mary Alice Brandon you are grounded!" Mom yells. I laugh and look back. "Have fun trying to make me stay here." I say as a laugh escapes me and I walk up the rest of the steps in to my room. I slam the door shut, I need a plan.

Bella's not coming back. I know that much. She's too damn stubborn to do so. I... God, what am I going to do without her?... I can't, it hurts too much. I take a deep breath to hold it back, hold back the pain. I walk to my balcony and climb down the wall like Bella showed me. I sneak past my family and into the garage.

I look around the stuff until I find a new pack of door knobs and grab it and a few screw drivers. I put everything in a small bag and sneak back and climb back up to my room. I wait until night finally falls and then I change the lock. And I keep the key with me.

I shake my head, tears pooling in my eyes without falling. Everything's falling apart. Without her, without Bella… Nothing else matters. Bella is a rich person. She took me to Paris and took me on _two _unlimited shopping sprees for God's sake! But without her… It means nothing. Because all I ever needed, all I ever really wanted, was her. And now she's gone and it's all their fault.

I chuckle quietly to myself, a bitter sounding laugh. "It's your fault, too," I whisper to myself. And I know that it's true. I stood there. I just stood there and let Carlisle, my "oh-so-loving father", insult her, torment her. The things that he said were unforgivable, yes, but what I did… What did was infinitely worse. She tried to respect them, but Bella never loved my family and even if she had she most certainly wouldn't have loved them as much as she loved me. So, for me to just stand there as he said all of those horrible things to her… That is worse than unforgivable. Besides that, all that my silence did was reinforce the idea in her head that what he said could ever actually be _true…_

I shake my head quickly. I just, I can't think about this. Not yet. Not now. I just – can't…

This house... My _family_… They made me change. Only this time - I can promise them: It's not for the better.

**A/N: yup, I'm evil. Letter may, or may not be next chap. Haven't decided yet.**


	54. Chapter 54

_**A/N: Here it is, the letter. It's something…**_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT.**_

_**Ch.54**_

_**Bpov**_

_I unfold the two pieces of paper and sit down in my chair. I take a shaky breath. This is it. Life, show me how much you can really fuck me over._

_To my daughter, Bella._

_Bella, I hope that you waited until you're 18 to read this. I'm sorry if you are reading this letter, because that means, I'm dead and that I left you alone. For that, you can never know how sorry I am. But at least I feel comfort in knowing you will never want for anything and that Jenks is watching over you... well, as best as Jenks can take care of someone. He's not even around is he? Make sure I haunt him soon…_

_Anyway, I want to apologize, my girl. I want to ask you to forgive me for everything I did. I forced you to grow up at ten because I was too weak to cope with your mother's passing and instead of me taking care of you, you ended up taking care of me. I apologize that I was almost never around; that will be explained later on. And, I'm truly sorry that when… that punk, did what he did…_

_When he did that, I am sorry that instead of caring for you and giving you love, I let you confide in yourself. That instead of caring for you as my daughter first, I just pushed you and drilled you like a soldier. And for that, I can never forgive myself._

_I ask for your forgiveness and I hope no more harm comes your way. But, I need to tell you the main reason why I wrote you this letter. I know that after this, I will lose any respect you may have left for me, but it's needed. So, with a shaking hand and a non-existing heart I admit:_

_I had another family. I apologize, but continue reading. During the time I was with your mother, I had another family. I know, it sounds bad. Please, keep reading. I will explain everything, but please. Continue reading._

_Yes, I have another family. The thing you don't understand is that during the time I was with your mother, there was a long year where we broke up. She told you that I had left for a boot camp, when in reality I was focusing on the company and I met this woman._

_Her name is Clara, Clara Valentine. I never really did love her, and soon me and your mother were fine. But, Clara called me one night to tell me she was pregnant and that it was too late to terminate. I told her I didn't believe her and that I wanted a DNA test. We had to wait for the pregnancy to come full circle and by that time…_

_By that time, I was already back with your mother. We were great, but I also knew… I knew that if I fucked up one more time. If I hurt your mother once more, it would be it. So, I did what any desperate man would do. I lied. I never told your mother about Clara or the pregnancy._

_I posed as a cop, I was deputy sheriff. And I used that as an excuse to be able to go to Clara's house when she left ill and when she finally had the kid…. Another girl… I fell in love with that kid. Her eyes just seem to focus on me and I knew, the second I held her in my arms that… that there was no way I could ever give her up._

_So, I was caught between two things I loved. My two girls and I couldn't bear to hurt your mother. I'm sorry, and even more so for the lie I have brought out into light now. Her name is Renesmee Clarie Cullen. Last I spoke to them, which was an hour or so ago she's doing fine and living in Phoenix, Arizona. Her number, if you care to contact her, is 7084-468._

_You being 18 and the only known heir to my fortune, it's your decision on whether you want to acknowledge her as your sister or not. I can't force you seeing as I'm not there, but I know you will do the right thing._

_And I know you will make me proud. One way or another, I just hope you make the right decision. Ness is not to blame for my mistake. Like you are not to blame for your mother's death, no matter how much you want to believe so._

_I never wanted to lie to you, my Bella. But I could see it in your eyes, every single time I did one thing… anything stupid on my part, it would hurt you. Sure you would hide your tears, but I could hear your sobs from my room. And they shattered me every night. I am sorry for what I put you through and the emotional stress I imagine you are feeling._

_I will never be the best parent out there, and I guess the only thing I was good at was being a soldier. Sometimes I wonder how things would have been between me and you had I entered your room that night you were yelling for your mom. Or the night you were crying your heart out and all I could do was stand at the door with my head leaning against it and try to wish away your pain._

_I was never a good parent. Renee was the only person… she was the only person I could ever give me heart to. And once she left… that killed me. I just hope that in a way you can forgive me._

_I'm not proud of my past. I used a lot of woman to get over my pain. Partly in the same way that you use women to feel needed. Yes, I know all about you sneaking out of the house and coming back in the wee hours of the morning. And I also know that there are only a few things you can be doing at that time and I don't think sleeping was one of them._

_I would stress you bout this but… that would be the pot calling the kettle black. Just know that I love you, okay? I love you more than anything. You are my eldest child and the only one I have had the honor of seeing grow up. I sent Renesmee a letter as well. She's to open it at any age so don't be surprised if you meet her and she brings it up._

_Just, I need to tell you something. I'm not proud of what I did to those women. It's just who I am. It's just in me to hurt the people I care about. Push them back and keep anyone and everyone away from my heart – that is assuming I have one, right?... It's just who I am._

_I think you understand what I'm trying to say, right? You're just like me in that way. We're alike in so many ways. It's not just who I am – it's who we are. And that is a Swan: graceful, calm, majestic, smart. You name it._

_We are also fearless and we go after what we want. You see a fish you like, you take it. It's the only way I seemed to function… Who knows? Maybe I'm just sick that way… well, the doctor just told me your coming up on the elevator. I need to keep this safe for a while longer. I love you, Bells. My Bella._

_I will always love you and no matter what you do in life, just know I am proud you are my child. Never forget that. Your father, your friend, and, in the way that I acted, your equal and your minor._

_Charlie Swan._

I let my tears fall freely. I read the letter again and again. I hear banging on my door; it sounds so far away. I think it's Leah and the pack. I don't want to see them, I don't…

… What do I want?...

Alice. Besides Alice?... nothing. I don't need anything. I can't have Alice, I don't… deserve Alice. I don't need anything, I don't need anyone. I don't need a father. I don't HAVE a father. I don't need a mother, I don't HAVE a mother. I want Alice, I don't have her… I lost her, gave her up… I gave her up for her own good right?...

My thoughts… are coming together really slow… it's scary. I think, I think I'm going to be sick. I can't- I just can't breathe. I take a big gasp of air as I try to straighten up in my chair. I launch out of it as soon as I remember, this is Da- Charlie's office.

I feel a shiver of pure fury run threw my veins as I throw the letter on the desk and I walk down the stairs. I grab my motorcycle keys. I need to run from this house, I need to run from this place. I can't- I can't breathe, or think?- I can't, I... I just.

I throw the front door open to see Seth, Leah and Jake sitting on the porch. "Get out of here." I say as I pass them and throw open the garage. I grab my stupid helmet and a jacket from the rack and jump on. I turn it on to see Leah, Jake and Seth staring at me.

"Bella, you ok?" they asks. I smirk at them. "Never been better. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to find a lay or I'm going to go ape shit. And Leah, I'm just assuming you won't want the honors right?" I ask and after a startled glance at me, she shakes her head and I shrug.

"Stay at the house if you want, I think the back door is open. Food in the fridge, I'll probably be back around… 3 am. I need to get out of town for a bit if you get me." I saw and send them a wink as I gun out of there. I flip the shield down and focus on speeding down the road.

NO! YOU'RE NOT OK! My mind yells at me. I push the bike faster and lean over the handles so there is no drag. YES I AM, I MADE A MISTAKE! I FORGOT THAT I DON'T HAVE A HEART! I DON'T HAVE EMOTIONS, I DON'T BELIEVE IN LOVE! I yell back.

I sit on the bike as I launch fast down through the town and to the highway. I don't believe in love, I don't believe in love. I don't do relationships, I don't do relationships. I believe in fucking, I believe in fucking. You get in and out with the maximum amount of pleasure and minimum bullshit. That was my only fucking rule.

The only fucking rule I gave myself and I broke it. I love Alice, I know I do. But for my sanity, for the sake of making my last few months on this earth livable… I need to forget I ever did. I need to erase from my brain all the memories, all of her.

I need to forget her smile, her hair, her scent, her touch, her taste… everything. I shake my head and I feel the bike shake under me. I control it and speed down to Seattle. No, I don't sleep with anyone. I just go to a bar and drink, that's all I do.

On my way back I notice a chain go lose and break. "Shit!" I growl out as the bike starts to lose speed until it ends at a crawl. I put the stand up and get off checking it. I'm on the outskirts of town, on the highway.

I growl and throw my helmet on the ground in frustration. "YOU JUST LOVE MESSING WITH ME DON'T YOU CHARLIE!" I yell at the empty sky. "Wasn't it enough to fuck with my head, fuck with my life… you had to fuck with the only thing I ever thought pure?... You had to fuck up the image of you and mom? Was it all a lie?" I ask as I feel the tears burn in my eyes and my shoulders shake silently.

Why? Why me? Isn't there anyone else that the universe can screw over? Or maybe the better question is: how much more? How much more can I possibly take when I already have nothing left? How much more can I lose? Ha! My eyelids fall shut and I clench my hands into fists at my sides. Nothing… There's nothing left for me to lose. So why doesn't it stop? Why doesn't it ever… fucking… stop?!

How much can one person possibly be forced to endure? I watched Mom die because I wasn't smart enough to stop it. I got raped by Connor because I wasn't strong enough to stop him. And I lost Alice because I couldn't bear to destroy her like I've been destroyed.

There's a reason I don't believe in love. Because it's all just a lie. Love is supposed be this wonderful, amazing thing… Yeah, right. Love is just an illusion. It lulls you into a false sense of security and then… it'll break you. Because I know all too well how love can give someone the power to break you, whether they do it on purpose or not. I should know: I've been broken beyond repair. And I'm tired. I'm so fucking tired of it all… _Damn it!_

I fist my hair and yell. I'm so mad… I'm so mad right now. I grab my phone and call Jake. "Bella?! Where are you?" he asks. I sigh "On the highway, my chain broke and I can't get the bike fixed here." I say. "Ok, hold on. I'll grab the truck from out back and I'll go find you." he says. "Thanks." I mumble and he hangs up.

I slept with five women. Five, but their skin…. It felt wrong against mine. It felt wrong to give them pleasure. Sure, at the moment I couldn't notice shit. But now, that I analyze it. They wanted me to do it…. everyone wants something….

I ponder this until I see Jake show up. He helps me load the bike and we drive to my house and I walk up and take a shower. After I finish I walk back to the living room to find the pack.

I ignore them as I sit on my recliner and just look at the roof. "You going to tell us what's on your mind?" Leah asks. I roll my eyes. "Nothing is on my mind." I lie. She can tell. "Liar." She calls me out. I sigh. "I think I'm fucked." I say softly. Jake snorts. "What do you mean?" he asks.

I bit my lip. "Charlie… I read his letter…. He had another kid." I say and my group looks at me in shock. I shrug. "The bastard kid can go to hell for all I care." I mutter as I fix myself a drink.

"Bell, it's not the kids fault." Seth says. I shrug. "It's not my fault either. Charlie fucked up, he died. Why do I have to sort through all his dirty laundry. The kid I doing fine without my help. Why would they need it now?!" I ask.

Jake sighs. "Still, you should call. You have a sibling." He says and I shake my head. "I don't do family." I say and sit back down with my scotch. "Then what are we?" Seth asks. I roll my eyes. "Family, but not the annoying kind." I say and he raises an eyebrow. "What if she's not the annoying kind?" he asks. I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose.

"What do you guys want me to do? Just up and call her. 'Oh, hey sis. Sorry I never talked to you before, our dad just never told me you existed, so how's your slut of a mother doing? Yeah, wow, interesting.' No, I can't do that." I say and take a drink of the scotch.

Leah stands up. "I'll find the number." She says and walks up the stairs. "I am not calling that little brat!" I yell and she just ignores me. I rub a hand over my face. I can't do this. Leah comes back with the letter and she's reading over it.

Well, no. She's not reading, she's skimming. She's looking for a phone number. "Here it is." she says and flips my phone open. She types the number and calls. "One second." She says and throws the phone at me. I glare at her. "Fuck you" I mouth as I put the phone to my ear.

"Hello, this is Mary. Who am I speaking to?" I ask. "Um, Clarie Valentine." The voice says. I nod. "Awesome, so… later." I say and hang up. I throw the phone on the coffee table and lean back. "There, I talked to her. You happy now?" I ask dryly and she glares at me. "YOU didn't even talk! Or give you real name!" Leah says. I shrug. "I don't need to speak to anyone. They are nothing to me." I say and ignore the looks from the pack as I line up and take a long hard sniff.

I let it cloud my mind, I don't need anyone…

**A/N: Writers block, hope it's any good…**


	55. Chapter 55

_**A/N: Here is chap 55 let's take a look in Bella's mind. A calm chapter maybe…**_

_**I don't own Twilight.**_

_**Ch55**_

_**Bpov**_

I sit on the piano bench, the cold wood of the black grand piano in front of me keeping my mind blank. The pack is asleep in the guest bedrooms. We didn't speak that much earlier. I mostly just took lines and drank while they talked. I didn't have anything to add. Besides, I didn't want to talk.

I run my hand slowly over the ivory keys and soft melody follows my action. I shake away the feelings nagging at my head and play _My Immortal_ by Evanescence. I take a shaky breath as images flash behind my eyes. I fight through it, and my shoulders move along with my fingers as I get lost in the song, in my mind, in my memories…

_I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears  
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave  
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone_

I can see an image of Alice yelling at me. **"**_**You're just a scared child!"**_ she had yelled at me once. I shut my eyes tighter. Then, I see yesterday morning, the way that she had looked so lost, so forlorn. _**"Bella… what are you doing to me?"**_ she had asked me… _what are you doing to me?..._

_These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase_

Connor… Veronica… Mom… Dad… Alice… Shit, I fuck everything up. I make people do things… I take them and I change them for the worse. No, I don't just change them – I destroy them until there's nothing left. Why does the world have to keep attacking me? I don't have anything left to give…__

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have all of me

Holding Dad when he took his last breath… Wiping away Alice's tears when she thought of her family hating me... Fighting in the ring… Fighting in general… Holding Alice's hand and acting like we were all alone, just the two of us in our own little world… She still has me… My heart, it's still in her hands. __

You used to captivate me by your resonating light  
Now, I'm bound by the life you left behind  
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams  
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me

__Alice, my angel, my light…. Now I'm left in the darkness… with no way of getting out. Her smile, her eyes, her hair, her skin, her smell… they all chase me and tease me like the most pure and perfect life in my dreams, taunting me with the one thing that I truly want in this world... Only to have me wake up and see that it was just that, a dream, and that I truly and royally fucked up my life… I think I'm going crazy, I can still feel her breath across my neck, her hands on my skin, her lips on mine, her voice in my ear, her heart beating against mine with the two of them so in tune with one another that it felt like there was only a single beat. I'm going crazy…

_These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase_

I feel a stabbing pain in my lungs, my gut, my chest… my closed eyes, I feel tears I won't let fall soak to my lashes. I take a deep breath, but it doesn't offer any sort of relief. It's almost as if I don't have any lungs at all… it's like I'm not even breathing… it's like slowly I'm falling and I'm just trying to not be killed by all of the pain caused by it.__

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have all of me

Alice… _**"Why can't you just trust me enough to open up?! I'm not the enemy Bella, I'm the good guy!" **_she had yelled once. I should have just closed it off. I should have never let anyone in. Why would I?... They can't hurt me if I don't let anyone in. If I'm closed off, nothing can come in… I don't need anyone… I've never needed anyone… And it goes both ways. No one needs me, so why should I need them?... They're better off without me, so… I'm better off without them... right?__

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone  
But though you're still with me, I've been alone all along

"_**Just let me in, Bella."**_ Alice's voice echoes in my mind. _**"I'm here, forever."**_ It taunts me._**"I will only love you."**_ It whispers. _**"My family will come around…"**_ It breathes into me._**"It doesn't mater if they don't, what matters is you and me."**_ It kills me… It lies… It hurts…__

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have all of me, me, me.

I finish the song, and throw myself off of the piano bench. I run a hand threw my hair. Emotions… they get in the way of everything. I never wanted to feel this way again, I never wanted to care about anyone… I never wanted to let anyone in. But Alice…

She just… she got under my radar, her small figure didn't make her a threat… Little did I know… she woke up my dead heart just so that I could feel this pain all over again… That same unbearable feeling that I broke my self once again… I'm so destructive… I destroy, I break…

"**You are going to destroy my daughter!" **Mr. Cullen's voice shouts in my head. I fist my hands and clench my jaw tightly as I walk to the banister and rest my arms on it as I look down at the loft… I shake my head, as another voice rips through me, bringing a new wave of torment. **"You say you would do anything for our daughter… what if that meant you had to be out of the picture?" **his voice taunts me, tearing through me viciously.

I feel myself falter as a wave of pain flashes threw my body. _**"She died because of you!"**_Veronica's voice echoes within me I clench my jaw. It's true, I let her die… _**"It's your fault, everything is always your fault." **_Connors voice whispers and I can't deny it. It is my fault… _**"You just hate to let anyone near your heart! That is assuming you have one!"**_Santana's voice screams in the distance.

"_**You're so heartless!" **_Natalia had yelled at me once. _**"Why don't you just sit, there and wither away in your own dark hole. It's not like anyone will ever care what happens! It's not like you let anyone in enough to care!"**_the voices yell.

I shake my head. I can't do it. I just can't. "I don't care," I mumble closing my eyes so tight that it hurts. I take a deep breath and I feel the familiar nagging feeling on the back of my head… I don't fight it. I welcome it. I let the numb feeling consume me and push me back. Push me in so deep I feel like I don't exist.

I don't feel cold… I don't feel pain… I don't feel at all…

After a few minutes of just looking out the huge window to the moon, I walk over to the piano bench and stand on it. I sit on the piano as my feet are on the bench and I look out the window. I grab the cig and lighter that are next to me on the piano and light up.

My movements are mechanical, thoughtless. Inhale smoke, hold it in, and let it out. "Love… what a sick, cold heartless bitch you really are..." I murmur with a smirk. "Who was I trying to fool?... Alice is better off without me, I know that much is true. And, she still has my heart with her… I don't want it back," I murmur as I let my head fall in my hand. I smoke the rest of the cig in silence and I look up in time to see the first drops of water hit the glass window.

I see a flash of light that shines against my silver lighter. I hold it in my hands, twisting it around in my fingers, its cool metal soothing my sweaty palms. I flip it open, hearing the metal clang. I spin the spark plug and it lights.

I look at the small flame in my hands I lift my left hand and run the tips of my fingers over the fire. I don't feel the heat. I do feel the sting of it burning though. My eyes trained on the flame in my hands, I run my fingers over the flame again. I look at the flame closely… Destruction, anger, evil… the flame is me…

I use my left hand and pick up a tooth pick I had been playing with and hold it to the light until it catches. I flip the lid and the fire in the lighter dies. I look down at the flame on the toothpick.

I switch the toothpick to my right hand and use my left forefinger and thumb to pinch the fire off. I feel the sting of it and I wince a bit but I don't move my fingers. "Bella, what are you doing?" I hear someone say. I look behind me to see Leah standing there, looking at me with a frightened look on her face.

She walks over to me and takes the toothpick from my hands and looks at my fingers. "Bella, what's gotten in to you?" she asks. I plaster a fake smile on my face. "I wanted to see if I would flinch, I guess I did." I say as my hand falls as Leah's eyes meet mine.

"Bell?" she asks again and I shrug and look out the window. I feel her lift my hand up and when I look at her she kisses my fingers. "What's gotten in to you?" she asks as she lets my hand drop slowly.

I smirk. "Nothing's wrong. I'm just thinking," I say, my voice, it sounds so dead. Sounds psychotic… I kind of like it… is that bad? I sigh and stand up before I drop down off the bench and land on the balls of my feet.

"I'm heading for a walk. You should get some rest," I say looking over my shoulder at her. Leah stands there and shakes her head. "Don't shut me out Bell." She says and I bite my lip and let my head drop. I look at the front door from the top of the stairs. "There's nothing to shut you out of." I say my voice a bit raspy.

"Bella." She says softly and I let my head fall back and look at the roof. "Get some rest, Leah. We have school in a few hours." I say as I start to descend the stairs. I grab my jacket from the hook and shut the door behind me. I walk down my porch and to the woods.

I walk slowly. I'm a masochist. I really am. Why else would I be doing this? Why else would I walk down the same path I have walked for six months? I clear my mind of thoughts and walk to the border of the Cullens back yard.

I let my eyes trail over the house and to the balcony I know so well. I look through the glass wall to see Alice on the balcony. She shouldn't be up this late. There's school tomorrow. As if feeling my eyes on her, her head lifts up and I watch as she scans the woods.

She can't see me from where I'm standing but it's as if she can feel that I'm here. She stands closer to the railing and looks around again. "Bella…" she whisper yells. "Bella… are you around?" She says. I'm tempted. I want to answer her so badly… but I'm a masochist.

I don't do it. I stay silent, and I see her shoulders slump and her head drop before her shoulders shake. I can't help it. I take a step forward and a stupid twig snaps under my foot but I jump back and into the shadows. It's where I belong anyway. I look at Alice. "I'm leaving my heart here with you. I can't afford to feel anymore," I whisper brokenly. Then, I turn on my heel and walk back. And then I feel it.

My eyes go wide as I feel that searing white-hot pain, then… nothing. I breathe a gasp and then, after my breathing slows and evens out, I run. I just have to get out of here. I run without stopping all the way to my house and when I get there I go upstairs and take a shower. I get dressed and wake everyone up.

When it's time to leave, I walk out and get in my car and the crew follows suit. I shift gears and without another word I speed down the road. No feelings. No emotions. I don't need them. I can't stand to deal with them anymore. I don't have it in me, not anymore. They're all just a waste of my time… Besides…

Who needs emotions when all they do is hurt you?

**A/N: Review? Yei, like it?**


	56. Chapter 56

_**A/N: Glad you all liked the last chapter. Read & Review!**_

_**I do not own twilight. **_

_**Ch.56**_

_**Bpov.**_

I park my car and sit on the trunk and take out a cigarette. The pack gets out of the car and stands in front of me. They talk about trivial things like homework and what not. I just stare at the cloudy sky.

I feel someone put a hand on my shin and I look down to see Leah shaking my leg. I take my headphones out. "Yeah?" I ask. "I said, are you ok? You look a little spaced out." She says. I shrug. "I had two lines this morning." I murmur running a hand threw my hair, scratching my scalp.

She frowns. "You didn't eat anything?" she asks. I shrug. "I drank a soda." I say to her and she shakes her head. "Come on; let me get you something from the vending machine. It's better than nothing." She says. I stare at her with a blank face. "It doesn't mater." I say and she grabs my backpack and I slide off my trunk.

I land softly and, after running a hand through my already crazy hair, I sigh and follow after Leah. My head still bopping to the sound of the song I'm listening too. "I, hate. Everything a about you." I sing along quietly as I fallow behind. I hear the guys behind me, but I honestly dong care.

I see from the corner of my eyes that a few girls are smiling at me. I smirk, freshmen. I take a side step and walk over to them. "Hello, I'm sorry to just come out and say this, but you are really cute." I say as I lean next to her on the locker. She and her friends giggle. "Thank you, Bella. You're very cute, too." She says with a blush.

I hold back a laugh. _You won't say that in the morning… then again… maybe you will. _"So, I'm going to be blunt. I've seen you watching me and I was wondering if you wanted to talk a bit." I say and I feel a hand on my shoulder. I look up to see Leah and she pulls me back.

"Sorry, girls. Bella needs some food." Leah says and pulls me away. I chuckle as I'm pulled away and once we're next to the vending machines I feel tired so I sit on the ground. "I'm bored." I state looking at nothing. My eyes closed and my head tilted up facing the roof and leaning against the locker.

I zone out for a few seconds but come back to it when someone pulls off my headphones I snap out of it. Seth turns off my iPod and puts it in my backpack with Leah standing next to him. "Eat." She says pushing a bag of potato chips at me. I try to fight of my smirk but do as she says.

I eat one chip at a time quietly as they sit around me. Jake and Seth start talking about a basketball game that will play tonight. Leah sits nest to be and she stares at me quietly as I eat. Once I finish chewing on a chip I look at her. "What?" I ask around a mouth full of food.

She smiles a bit. "Don't speak with your mouth full." She says and I gulp down the food. "Ok, what about now?" I ask and she chuckles. "It's nothing, I'm just wondering what's going on in that mind of yours." She asks. I open my mouth to speak when the doors at the end of the hall open and I see Alice walk in with a scowl.

Shit, is she going to hit me again? Hmm… I don't think I mind. I see her stop when she sees me and her eyes go confused for a long moment before she looks over her shoulder. Her siblings show up, as usual. Maybe they should be called her bodyguards? I disguise a laugh with a cough.

As I lean my head back and continue to eat my chips. My eyes follow her behind my sunglasses. She turns on her heals and tells them something before storming off to the different direction. They stand there frozen for a long minute before Emmett's eyes land on me.

He offers me a smile and I nod to him and he says a few things to his siblings before slowly making his way to me. "Er, hey, Bell." He says standing in front of me. I shuffle and stand up. "Hey, Em… what's up?" I ask as I finish the chips. "Nothing much, I just wanted to say I'm sorry about Rose yesterday. And Alice." He says and I smirk a bit. "It's cool, Em. Not a big deal, I'm used to getting hit." I say with a shadow of a smile on my lips.

He frowns a bit. "Er, I guess." He says and I stand straight and shift the bag from my shoulder. "Well… um, is there anything you wanted talk about?" I ask trying to find out what it is he wants. He opens his mouth but I hear Rosalie's sharp voice a few feet behind. "Emmett! We're going to be late for class!" she snaps at him.

He frowns and his shoulders slump. "I guess I'll see you later Bell." He says and I nod and he walks away. I grab my bag from the floor. "Er, I should head to Math." I murmur as I start walking down the hall. I walk in and get a glare from the teacher. "Bella, you're late." He states.

I shrug. "It's nothing new." I say as I walk to the back of the class to one of the empty tables. "Excuse me?" he asks. I sigh and drop my bag on the table. "It's not a new thing sir, I am always late. You always give me detention, I always get out of it. Please, stop the dramatics." I say lowly as I sit down in my chair.

He fumes and grabs a red slip from his desk and walks to me. "I want to speak to your guardian as soon as possible." He says. I shrug. "I'm eighteen, he can't really do much anymore." I say and the teacher shakes his head. "I want him to call me." he says. I smirk. "Sure thing, sir." I say in a mocking voice as he turns.

As soon as he has his back to me I crumple the note and throw it over my shoulder. I lay my head at my desk and ignore the class. I should really take that exam thing, get high school over with. That way, I can just skip the last month of class and then off myself around September.

I rub my hand over my face as I stand up and walk out of the classroom and in to my next class. Alice is in this class. I walk past her and sit at my usual desk, maybe I should move desks? I sigh and stand up and walk to the desk across the room, at the front. I hate being at the front of a class, makes it easier for the teachers to know I'm not paying attention.

I snort quietly but force myself to act like I'm paying attention… I'm doing a lot of acting nowadays. As soon as this class is over I walk out the door and lean against the lockers, feeling dizzy. I should have slept… no, I couldn't. I shouldn't have sniffed those two lines… I had to…. Damn.

Kate passes me and she knocks her shoulder against mine and I slam against the locker. "Umf." I mumble as the air is knocked out of me. She smirks. "See you in the ring, captain." She says with a fake salute. I frown… oh, right. I was accepted back into sports and coach Clap made me captain of the kickboxing team.

I rub my temples. "Great." I mutter as I walk away to my next class. The morning passes in a boring lob of time. Time, that doesn't mean anything now that I plan on stopping my own. I walk down the hall to my lunch room when I feel a hand on my wrist. I turn to see the girl I had talked to this morning.

I nod. "Hey." I say unenthusiastically. "Hey." She says seductively. I frown and look at her slowly. She wants something. "What do you want?" I ask tilting my head to the side, trying to make my voice sound a bit innocent from its monotone. She smiles a bit. "I want to see what the huge deal is about." She says and I laugh softly, unamused. It's forced.

"No, you don't." I say shaking my head as I pull her hand away from my wrist. I let her arm go and turn to walk, but she follows me. "Oh, come on Bella. It's not like you turn down anyone." She says. I smirk. "Actually I do, I turn down a lot of people." I say as I get in line.

"Really?" she asks and I feel her arms around my waist. My eyes close and I pull away from her. "Don't touch me that is the first rule you need to know about me." I say my voice hard as I stare down at her. Her face goes blank for a second before she nods.

I shake my head. "Just… leave me alone." I mutter as I step forward and look at what they are serving. My stomach drops, not hungry. "I'll have a bottle of water… and a cookie." I say, I add the cookie so that Leah will stop bitching. They give me my food and I walk, ignoring the red headed girl that was behind me.

I walk slowly to my table to see it empty. I pause as I place my trey and look around the cafeteria to see the Cullens sitting on a small round table. I frown as I stand there looking at the table. I let my shoulders drop, I did fuck up my life.

I sit down and start to nibble the cookie, I feel stares burning me from all directions. I lift my head and look around to see the whole cafeteria looking at me. I hold back my anger as I look around again and see the Cullen's looking at me. Their faces are... blank.

I take a bite of my cookie and I feel a hand on my shoulder. I look back to see a few girls. "Hey, looks like you need some company. Mind if we sit here?" the blond girl asks. I shrug. "Don't care." I say as I open my water bottle and drink half of it in a few gulps.

The three girls sit and I ignore them as I eat quietly. Where is the pack? I lift my head to scan to see them sitting at a small table, looking between me and the girls. I lift an eyebrow and they look down. I look at the girls. "I'll be right back." I mumble to no one as I stand and walk over to them.

"What are you doing all the way over here?" I ask. "Well, your table is full." Seth says. I frown. "There are more empty seats then there are people." I say and they look at their treys. They sigh softly. "Bella, we care about you. We can't stand to see what you're doing to yourself. We think… we think you should consider getting some help. Maybe it would help?" Jake says.

I stare at him in shock and clench my jaw. "I'm not crazy." I say. It's a lie, I know, but I don't want to talk to anyone. "Bella, you're shutting us out. You shut everyone out, and we don't know what to do." Leah says. I stare at them and run a hand through my hair. Are they serious? "You're joking right? You can't just… no, you can't do that." I say shaking my head, I feel the tears in my eyes.

They can't just… let me go… not just like that. Seth stands up. "Bella, it's not like that. We just didn't know if you wanted us at your table. You've been so distant today… and for the past week." He says. I put a hand at the back of my neck as I stare at them. "I… forget it… I just.. I need time." I murmur as I run a hand over my forehead.

"Bella, we know you need time. Exactly that but, you don't need to overdo it with the blow." Jake says and I laugh. "You're such a hypocrite, you hit that shit more than I do." I say and he stays quiet. I shake my head. "Forget it, I don't know why I bothered..." I murmur as I turn to walk away. "Bella, wait up." Seth says and I look behind me "It's not like that. We just think you want your space." He says.

I nod. "Fine by me. I dont need anything, I dont need anyone." I say with my empty voice and my face is blank, im trying so hard not to show this furry I have inside. I walk back to my table, I grab my water bottle and I feel a hand come in contact with my arm and when I look back I see Tanya. "Hey, Bell. Want some company." She says and I look at her for a long moment. "No." I say and she smiles and steps closer to me, pressing herself to me.

"I think you do." She says and I look down at her with my head tilted… I smirk and hold her hand, in mine and slowly bring it up to her face. "I said no, darling." I say as I take a step away from her. I really don't want to flare out at her, she doesn't deserve my crap. No one does.

"Aw, come on Bella… I think you could use something to distract yourself." She says and I feel a firmer hand grabs my other arm and I look to the side to see Heidi. "Tanya, why don't you go crawl up some guy's ass. I think Bella needs some air." She says and pulls me to her, I frown as I look between the two girls. I dont care, I just want to be alone. What? all of a sudden what I want is a mute point? All that matters is that these two girls want to be fucked and they want me to do it. They dont care if im in to it or not. They just asume, im ok. And that, that does get on my nerves.

I feel dizzy as I fight down the bile in my throat. I shake my head and pull away from Tanya. "Just leave me alone... both of you." I say as I walk away from them both. "Bella…" Heidi says and I turn my head to look at her "Yes?" I ask, I know I will regret it.

"Why don't we talk for a bit?" she asks. "I have nothing to talk about." I say and with that I turn my back to them and walk out the cafeteria. I lay down on a bench table, ignoring everything. I want to disappear. No, it's more than that - I want to die. I don't have a purpose, I don't have anything to work for, to live for.

I have no reason to be alive, or to wake up… I snort. Life, just kill me. Death, death should be peaceful. Life is too hard. I give up on wanting that… I don't want to live… Life is a bitch, and then you die.

Life sucks, and then you die… Yeah, I should be that lucky, I think bitterly to myself as I look up at the dreary clouds. My heart clenches, I frown. I shouldn't be feeling anything… Is the numbness not enough this time?... I shake my head and look at the sky…

I zone out looking at it, until it starts to rain. That's when I get off the table and walk back in to the lunchroom, sure I'm soaking wet. It's just like me to zone back in once I'm soaking wet. I sigh as I make my way indoors and walk across the almost empty lunch room and to the locker rooms.

I grabbed a pair of my clothes from one of my lockers and headed over. I know this hour is the coaches' free hour so they normally take a looong lunch hour. I concentrate on the warm water against my muscles as I take a shower. I feel bile climb up my throat and I don't have enough time to run to the stalls so I vomit into the drain of the shower.

I keep vomiting my guts out and after that I stand on shaky legs as I let the water wash me down. I concentrate on breathing, I need to head home. I get dressed slowly… I'm so tired. I slip on my shoes as I hear the door to the girl's locker open. I slip on my next shoe and I hear a locker being opened.

I let my eyes close as I tie my shoes. I don't really care who is around me. I hear the footsteps walk toward me before stopping. "Bella?" Victoria's voice asks. I open my eyes and I nod. "Hey, Vic. Haven't seen you around." I say as I stand up and slip my other leather jacket on – the one I was wearing was soaking wet.

"I was with my dad in Seattle for a while… I heard what happened with Alice… I'm sorry." She says softly. I smile. "Why are you sorry? It's not like it was your fault. Shit happens." I say as I run the towel over my short hair.

She smiles a bit but shakes her head. "No, I mean… I'm sorry you're sad. You two were happy." She says. I close my eyes, "Um, sure. I need to go… home." I say and open my eyes to see her looking at me silently.

"You don't look so good, Bell." She murmurs. I smirk a bit, it's a fake smirk… every smile is a fake smile. "Well, I'm coping, the only way I know how." I say and Vic chuckles. "Sex, booze and drugs?" she asks. I laugh softly. "Yeah… how did you..?" I ask.

She smiles. "You forget, Bella, that before all of this ever happened, we were friends." She says leaning against the lockers. I run a hand through my wet hair. "We are friends." I say frowning. She bites her lip but shakes her head. "You don't let anyone in far enough, to call them friends." She says.

I frown. "The pack and I are friends, we're like a family." I say, but i think the word "we're" fit better. She nods "Those three… they got under your skin quickly. You fixed them… They look up to you and you care for them but… Until you learn not to shut anyone out, you can't call them your friends. Not really." she says looking at me softly.

"I don't shut, people out." I lie. But, people shut me out too, so.. I don't get why I'm the one getting shit for it. People are so infuriating. And by the smile on her face, I know she knows it's a lie too. "Yeah, you do… Bella, I'm not trying to make you feel bad, or hurt or anything. I'm just worried about you. How are you doing?" she asks taking a step closer.

I frown and look at the tile floor. "I'm trying, it's just not good enough." I whisper and I feel her hands cup my cheeks. She looks in my eyes sadly and runs a hand threw my hair before bringing it back to my cheek "I know you are… I don't think I've ever, in my entire life, have I seen a person try so hard at coping with pain… It hurts just to watch, Bell." She whispers and pulls me to her.

I hug her back and hide my head in her neck, "I'm fine, you don't need to worry." I murmur in to her neck. She rubs my back. "That's a lie and we both know it." she says to me. I sigh and pull away from her. "It's only a lie, if you don't believe it will get better." I say with a fake smile as I lean against the lockers. "Sure, Bell… just know you still have me. Ok? You still have friends." She says.

I nod once. "Sure, Vic. I'll remember." I say and grab my gym bag. I pull it over my shoulder and start walking out of the gym. I walk over to coach when I see him. "Hey, coach. I need to ask you a question." I say and he looks at me and smiles. "Swan, shoot." He says with a smile. I chuckle. "Um, when's the fight against West Forest park?" I ask adjusting the bag on my shoulder.

He nods and motions for me to fallow him. "Well, last I heard it's Friday night, so I need you to stay out of trouble. You are after all the main attraction." He says and I roll my eyes. "When's the sparking practice?" I ask. He lifts some papers from his clip board. "Um.. every night this week except for Thursday because you will rest that day after an early practice and then Friday night is the fight." He says.

I nod. "Alright, I'll stay out of trouble, coach." I say and he nods and stares at me for a long moment. "And none of that partying. You rest up now." He says and I nod and ask him to write me a note because I am leaving. He does and I keep it in my book bag for tomorrow.

I get in my car and drive to my house. Once I arrive, I close the door behind me with a bang and walk to the kitchen. I grab a few things to make myself some pasta. I scratch my neck as I think about everything slowly…

"Renesmee, what kind of a crazy name is Renesmee Clarie Valentine? Was the chick high?" I ask myself as I add salt to the water I am heating. I grab the noodles and put them in the pot.

I smirk. "Some girls are like pasta, straight until wet." I chuckle softly as I put a lid and grab the pot to start the alfredo sauce. I chop a pre-cooked chicken filet and put it in a dish with a bit of oil, let it cook first.

I work with everything and before the hour has passed I have my plate of food. I grab that and a Volturi Beer as I make my way to the living room. I place the foot on the coffee table that still has a few lines of blow on it along with my silver tube and the blade. I shake my head and turn on the TV.

I flip through channels until I stop at some CNN news room report. I sit back and eat my chicken pasta Alfredo quietly. After I finish my food I put my plate in the sink and my empty bottle in the trash. I grab another bottle and walk back to the living room and eye the blow.

I take a swig of my beer and grab my glass bowl and drop the two lines in there. I walk to the kitchen and rinse the bowl and blow out of it. It was fun while it lasted, but the blow was getting to me.

I clean the bowl that was for blow and walk back to the living room and drink my beer quietly. I flip my phone open and scroll down the recent calls list and look at the number at the top. I press options and my finger hovers over the delete button. I sigh and press the save button.

Name: Renesmee

Last Name:

I sigh and save it without a last name. I look at my contact list and push Mute on the TV and push call. My hands sweat and I take a drink of my beer before they answer. "Hello?" a soft aged voice asks. I sigh "Um, Yes. This is Bella Swan. I know this may sound weird but I am the daughter of Charlie-" I'm cut off. "Your Charlie's daughter." The voice says shocked. I clench my jaw. "Yes, not that that mattered to you." I say a bit sharply.

The line is silent and I sigh. "Er, I… I don't want to have this discussion. I just called to ask you if… if your daughter knew?" I ask. There's a soft sigh. "Yes, she knows." She says. I swallow. "I have one last question, then you won't hear from me again." I say. She agrees and I run my hand through my hair. "Does she have a good life?" I ask.

The line is silent for a long time before the woman answers me. "I don't know what you mean." She says. I sigh. "Does she have everything she needs?" I ask. The line is silent and I grow impatient. Is it really that hard of a fucking question? "I don't have all day, I just want to ask you that and I'm done with this bullshit." I snap on the phone.

The voice on the other end cracks. "I just, I don't understand what you're asking. Charlie made it clear he wanted nothing to do with me." she says and I nod. "Exactly, I want nothing to do with you or your kid. But I'm kind of forced to ask about her, I couldn't give a flying shit how you felt." I say in to the phone.

The line is quiet for a long time and I sigh. "Renesmee is her name right?" I ask. There's a sniffle. "Yes." The voice says. I nod to myself. "I'll send a guy over in a few days. If you're doing good you won't hear form me again. If not, I'll send a check so that you can buy what you need for her." I say and just like that I snap the phone shut.

I drop it on the coffee table and put my head in my hands. "Fuck you, Charlie. Why is it that I always have to clean up your mess?... Be grateful that I don't want another one of your kids to suffer. Because I'm all over that and I think just me is enough, no?" I ask the empty room.

I sigh as I feel like nothing is making sense. I don't care for that little brat. She's nothing to me. I just found out she existed a day ago, one day. I don't give a damn about anyone. I smirk. "I don't… I'm just tying up lose ends." I say and take a swig of my beer.

I unbutton the first three buttons of my shirt, finish my beer and I shut off the TV. I walk slowly up the steps until I reach my room and grab my bag of blow. I walk to my bathroom and flush it in the toilet.

I turn on the hot tub, and put my iPod to play. I clean up a bit in my room and look at the pillow to my left… I grab it and bring it to my nose. I sniff and hold back a whimper… Alice… it smells just like Alice… I snuggle my head in to it for a few minutes before I put it back and walk back to the bathroom. I strip down and the water is already smoking. I love those quick heat jets.

I press play on my iPod and get in the water after turning on the jet lights and off the bathroom lights. I dip down completely and stay under water for a long moment. I stay down there until my lungs burn for air. I slowly let my head out of the water and take a big gulp of air. I run a hand threw my hair, pushing it back and lean my head on the edge. I take a few longs breaths, I still have a choice. I can end my life right now. I smile at that thought. I still have a choice… I don't have to live… I don't have to be in this pain for long.

I smile, a liberated smile. "I don't have to live." I whisper as I tilt my head and relax in the water. "Alice, I can pretend not to care… but you will always own my heart, my love. My beautiful, my angel… I will love you until I stop my hearts beating." I whisper.

I cannot fight for her. After all, it will just bring her pain. I don't want her to be in pain. She should have a family that loves her. She deserves to live in a happy life, with her 'perfect' family.

What can I offer her? Money?... They have it. They beat me in almost every way. I could just see the strain of having to choose between a family or a girlfriend. She would choose me… and I couldn't let her. After knowing a family… I know its hell to lose one… I couldn't do that to her.

I wouldn't do that to her, so if a bit of pain on both sides is what would save her from a lifelong pain… I could do that. I could do that and so much more for that girl… even now, I would give my life in a nanosecond for her.

Sure, I bet she's mad at her family… but its Alice, she won't be mad for long. And then she'll stop wishing I came back… then… I'd kill myself. I think with a heavy breath. "A life without Alice, isn't a life worth living." I murmur before I duck my head under the water again.

My eyes are open and I see the bubbles escape my mouth once I open it and water fills my mouth. So much for my air. I would snort if I could. I haven't really had any air since I lost Alice. I haven't been breathing since then, not really. So why keep trying? I spit the water out of my mouth and close my eyes… And there's nothing. All I can hear underwater is the water jets. All I can feel is the heat. All I can see is black. There's nothing…

And I smile. It's so… freeing when you're so close to death. It's so liberating to think that, if I stay down here long enough, I won't have to face another day without her… I won't have to endure the self-inflicted pain of losing her… I won't be able to hurt her anymore… I'll just be gone… I push my head out and gasp for breath. I shake my head furiously. No. Not yet. I can't do this yet. I need to make sure she won't blame herself. Just not yet.

After a few more minutes I grab the soap and after taking a shower in the hot tub I get out and get dressed for bed. I lay down on the bed looking up at the roof. It won't be too much longer now, but it's killing me a little bit more with each moment that passes. I need her. I need her and she's gone. And it's all my fault. But I won't try to get her back because she deserves better than me. She deserves everything, nothing less than perfection. And I sure as hell am not perfect. Besides, after I've hurt her so much – I wouldn't, couldn't, blame her if she hated me with everything she's got. "Alice… I hope you can forgive me one day..." I whisper as I close my eyes.

My breathing evens out and I fall into a deep sleep.

**Apov.**

I lay on my bed, staring up at the ceiling without really seeing it. I saw her today at school and she looked… broken… It hurts so much to see her like that. Not just broken. She was alone. Even the pack weren't with her today, and – even if she won't admit it or they don't really see it – she needs them. She needs someone there to hold her together... I know because, im bearly getting threw this pain my self.

I was right, I know. She won't come back to me – she's too stubborn and she loves me too much. Damn it… If I could just make her see that she doesn't ruin me, she builds me up. If I could make her see how much I need her, how much I want her, how much I love her… "Oh, Bella…" I sigh, letting my eyes fall shut as my breathing deepens, my heart beat slows, and I fall into a deep, exhausted sleep.

_**A/N: Bella is taking a step for the better at least, she's getting her head out of her depression. Next chap may be Alice pov..**_


	57. Chapter 57

**A/N: Here is the chap, your all going to like the ending of this chap.**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**

**Ch.57**

**Bpov**

Punch, punch, duck, kick, kick, round house. "Ungh." I groan when Valerie lands a kick on my stomach. I take three steps back and when she comes at me I duck and kick her back pushing her to the ropes.

I shake my hair out of my eyes and jump back a few steps waiting for her to make the next move. I'm covered in sweat. Valerie turns and sizes me up. I wink at her and she huffs, I give her a grin though all you can see is my tooth guard.

She runs to steps and I stick my foot out, tripping her. She falls to the ground and I roll to straddle her lap. I pin one of her arms and concentrate on trying to pin her other arm when my eyes catch Kate and Alice walking in the gym.

I look at them as they walk close together, and my hold on Valerie slips. She frees her other arm and pushes me off her. I roll and try to stand, only to get a kick in the stomach. "Ufff." I groan and Valerie grabs my arm and twists it getting me in an arm lock. I groan and try to unclasp her hand from my wrist before I get a sprain.

"Tap out Bella." Coach yells. I shake my head and tilt my ahead back as I feel the heat of pain flash in my arm. I pull my free arm back and land a strong punch to Valerie's gut. She lets me go and I slip from her grasp and make my way to the other side of the ring. I take a deep breath and twist my arm, it's still good.

I run my hand through my hair as I see Valerie stand up slowly. I dash to her and land a knee in the gut, quickly stepping back so that her swing misses me. I grab her arm and twist it, moving to stand behind her back. I knock her legs out from under her. She smacks onto the matt with a loud groan and I pin her there until with her good arm she taps out.

I let her go quickly and stand. I offer her my hand and she smiles up at me and I help her up. She takes her teeth guard out and smiles. "Dang girl, I forgot how quick you are on your feet." Valerie says taking off her helmet. I chuckle and take off my helmet and mouth guard.

"Thanks, I forgot how hard you kick." I say and she chuckles. "Next group three minutes." The Coach says and I walk to my corner. I sit on the little stool and shake my head. I'm tired but not nearly enough. I stand and jump over the cords and to the floor.

Coach walks over to me. "Bella, I know you're a firecracker and everything but when I say tap out I mean tap out." He says and I shake my head. "I knew what I was doing." I say as I take a swig out of my water bottle.

"I know you do, Bella, but we can't afford for you to get a strain. You're our best fighter." He says. I chuckle. "I get it coach, don't give yourself a migraine." I say as I use a hand towel to soak up my sweat.

He chuckles and goes on to ref the next fight. I walk over to the benches and sit down, and then I remember Kate. I growl and throw my towel on the bench as I stand and scan for her. I see her on the bleachers talking with Alice. I walk over there. Part of me doesn't want Alice to talk to her still, but that's not why I am marching over.

"Kate." I say my voice furious. She turns to smile at me. "Yeah?" she asks. I glare at her. "You were supposed to be here two hours ago to train! Our fight is in two days and your goofing off." I snap. I know I'm ignoring Alice but… I cant. If I see her I'll crack.

"I'm sorry; I didn't know I had to be here." She says with a tilted head. I glare down at her. "If you bothered to show up to practice this week maybe you would have found out. Now get your ass in the locker room and into the ring." I snap at her.

She sighs and after giving Alice a smile and a kiss on the cheek she leaves. My face goes blank… She kissed Alice?... on the cheek?.. I huff and shake my head and turn but a voice stops me. "Hey, Bella." Alice voice is soft, timid.

I freeze and turn to look at her. "Um, hey, Alice." I say giving her a ghost of a smile. She offers me a small smile in return. "How you been?" she asks. I shift from foot to foot. I can't do this. Every time I hear her voice… it's like a wave of pain keep's washing over me. Like it isn't already hard enough to see her walking around, to see her every day – it's ubearably painful.

To hear her voice say my name… it's agonizing. I ignore my own pain and lie to her. "Fine, just been… around." I say with a shrug. She nods but her hazel eyes they see threw me, like she's staring at my soul. Her eyes lock with mine and she frowns. "You look tired." She says softly.

I hold back a laugh. "Well, I did just come out of a fight." I say my voice sarcastic. I want her to hate me. She _should _hate me. Cant she understand that? GOD! Damn, this girl and her freaking pureness. He shakes her head. "That's not what I meant." She says, her eyes locked with mine.

It's too much, too intense. I break the connection and look to the side. "Well, I've been busier than usual." I say scratching my neck, avoiding her gaze. I feel like I'm under a spotlight with her. She knows me so well that it's unsettling.

"You've been avoiding me." Alice says, her voice hurt. I force myself to smirk. "Sure, I have." I murmur as I look around the court again trying to find something that will let me escape her. It hurts too much to stand here, to look at her, to see her smile at me. It hurts.

"Like right now, I know we... I know we broke up Bella, but that doesn't mean we can't be friends." Alice says softly. I laugh out loud, a bitter laugh that escapes from deep within my ruined and destroyed soul – if I have one, that is. "Yeah, tell that to your daddy. I'm sure he'd love that story." I say my voice a bit sharper then I intended. That doctor really earned my disliking and it showed in my voice.

The only bad thing is, Alice thinks it's directed to her. "Bella, I don't want to lose your friendship. You were my best friend." Alice says and I snort and run a hand through my hair. "What's next Alice? It's not you it's me? Let's stay friends? For God's sake, I've used those lines Alice. I know they're lies. There is no way for two people that were together to be friends. Trust me, if that were the case I would have more friends than fuck buddy's." I snap.

Shit, I did not just say that. Fuck! My eyes go wide. "I, I didn't mean it like that." I say and I see Alice's hurt eyes looking at her shoes. "Yeah, you did." She says softly. I fist my hair in my hand and take a step closer to her. "Alice." I say gently, shit, I can't see this girl hurt.

"I would lo… I mean, like to be your friend but… it hurts Alice. How do you expect me to stand here every day and smile at you and be around you and not….. It's a waste of time Alice… besides. I'm not good for you." I say and take a step back. I'm not good for her, I am not good for her. I'm not good enough for her.

"That's-" I cut her off. "Bullshit? It's not. You just need to face the facts that I'm not good, for you or for anyone. And thinking that I am… it's more stupid than believing there is a God up there that actually likes me." I say with a hint of a smile.

Alice huffs. "Your so stubborn… its ugh." She huffs. I smirk at her. "It's what?" I ask actually enjoying myself as she seems to get angry with me. "You are so… infuriating." She seethes.

I laugh. "That's… good to know." I say and turn on my heels back to the court. "So… I'm infuriating am I… Let's hope it's enough to get on your nerves." I murmur to myself as I slip back in to the ring.

I grab my helmet and mouth piece and turn to see… Kate. Fuck my life. I sigh and clip on the helmet. I walk to the middle of the ring and give her a smirk and a nod. She smirks back and gives me a salute, I nod in appreciation which gets her mad.

The bell rings and she launches forward. I duck under her arm and land a few punches on her sides before I step back in time to miss her kick. I bang my gloves together and duck from her punch but she lands a kick on my leg.

I stagger and reach forward and smack her across the face before jumping back. Kate throws a punch and I duck the other side and punch her jaw, making her lurch back. I roundhouse kick her and she falls back into the cords. I straighten up and smirk as she kneels on the ground catching her breath.

I walk over to her and kick her back slamming her to the ground, I jump back when she tries to knock my feet from under me. I move forward and sit on her back as I twist both her hands behind her back.

Coach moves forward to start counting. Kate struggles but I keep lifting her arms higher which causes her more pain. Once coach reaches one I let Kate go and stand and walk to my corner and slide down to the floor and grab my bag as I take my stuff off.

I look to the ring to see Kate standing in the middle of it glaring at me I smirk and bow. "Next time, be on time to practice." I say to her as I sling the bag over my shoulder and head home.

**OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO**

"Victor, did you check out what I asked you to do?" I ask through the phone the next day, early in the evening. "Yes, I went over and... I cannot believe they lived in a trailer park." He says. I cough on my beer. "W-what?" I ask wiping my mouth.

"The address she sent me, it was for a trailer home. She lives there with her daughter." He says. "You're shitting me… Dad wouldn't… fuck." I groan leaning my head on the counter. "How much should I send them? I can't exactly let her live there, it's dangerous." I say and I hear him sigh.

I hear the rustling of papers. "Around thirty thousand." He says and I cough again. "Thirty grand, what is she going to buy an Island!?" I ask in shock. Victor sighs. "No. It's just that their car is a wreck, they need to buy a house, and the rest is supposed to go for her college fund." He says.

I groan and run a hand through my hair… "I have to give a brat that I've never met… thirty thousand…Wow…" I murmur rubbing my temples. I had put the phone on speaker and now I was rubbing my face.

"Sign the check." I murmur, muffled by my hand. "What?" he asks. I sigh. "Sign the check. I'll take it out of Charlie's frozen account. I just don't want that kid in my life. The sooner I do this the sooner I can put it behind me." I say and after a long moment Victor agrees.

I hang up the phone and walk up to the office and pace there and go on line to check Dad's frozen account. I send a message telling them to expect a huge draw back and shut it off. Shit, I really could use a line of blow.

I walk over to my room and grab my blunt. "Better than nothing." I murmur as I light it up. I lie down on my bed and turn on my iPod and start scanning the internet while I smoke. I put out the blunt and feel myself starting to get hungry.

I grab my car keys and get in my car. I stop for a second. "I probably shouldn't drive high but… I've done worse." I say with a shrug as I change the shift and drive out of my driveway.

I drive to 'The Lodge' and get out. I enter and quickly I see… The Cullens… Fucking-A. I ignore their table as I walk over to the counter. "Hey, Mattie can I have the usual?" I ask. Mattie smiles. "Hey, Bell. Long time no see." She says and I lean against the counter and shrug. "I've been around." I say with a shrug.

She giggles and I tilt her head up to see the tattoo on her neck better. "Nice tattoo." I say with a grin. She ducks her head and swats my hand away playfully. "Go take a seat Bell. I'll deliver your food when it's done." She says and I take out my money and pay her in advance.

She nods and after she hands me my receipt, I take a seat in the back and lean my head against the table. Probably should have gone for tacos… "Mmm, tacos." I mumble as I lean my head back and wince.

Shit, I forgot my gut is black and blue. I take a deep breath and shake my head as I lift my sunglasses in time to see Mattie walk over with a beer in her hand. "Here you go." She says and after I give her a smile she leaves.

I take a swig of my beer and sigh as I take my phone out to check the time. I let my eyes scan over my phone and they lock with Alice's face as she smiles at someone in front of her… Emmett. I let my eyes linger on the table and quickly they lock with the cold gaze of Dr. Cullen.

I let my eyes stay locked with his as I take a drink of my beer and then I look around the room. I can see the pack sitting in the corner. I try to hold back the frown that wants to emerge at the sight of them… I pushed them too far. I run a hand through my hair and look at the table. Just then a plate with a hamburger and fries are placed in front of me.

I look up to see Mattie smiling. I smile. "Care to join me for a bit?" I ask. She looks at the counter. "Sure, let me just put this apron at the desk." She says and walks away. I dip a fry in ketchup and eat it as I wait for Mattie to get here. When she gets back she has a plate of food and a glass of coke with her.

"I'm taking my diner break." She says giving me a wink. I laugh softly and we start to eat. "So, um… What's new?" I ask her as I take a sip of my beer. She chuckles. "Nothing at all. This town gets more boring every day." She says and I laugh softly. "No kidding." I say chuckling.

"So, Bell. How are you doing?" she asks. I smile. "I'm doing great." I say. It's a lie but hey, she doesn't know that. I smirk and lean forward a bit. If I'm lucky I can keep my eyes off Alice and actually get Mattie back home.

"That's good to hear." She says and I shrug a bit and give her a lazy grin. As I put my shades in my jacket pocket I brush my hand over hers, smiling seductively. "So… how's that kid treating you?" I ask letting my eyes smolder.

She tilts her head. "W-what kid?" she asks. I chuckle lowly. "You know, that kid you were dating." I say. She smiles. "Oh, you mean John." She says. I nod and purse my lips as I trail my hand over the back of her hand before grabbing my beer bottle and taking a swig.

"Yeah, John. You two still together?" I ask before taking a bite of my burger. "Um, sorta." She says and I hold back my smirk as I take another bite. I raise an eyebrow in question. "It's just that… we're in the middle of a break up- make up stage." She says. I nod and swallow. "Oh, that sucks." I say, not really meaning it.

I move my foot to brush against her leg. "I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better." I say my voice in fake sadness. I see Mattie shift and her leg brushes against mine. "I think there's always something you can do…" she says her voice thicker than it was a moment ago.

I let a smile break across my face my signature 'crooked' smile. "Well I'm very glad to hear that." I say and take a bite of my burger. Mattie blushes a bit and bites her lip… Alice used to do that. I chance a glance at her table to see her looking at her plate with a bored expression.

I look back at Mattie and lean forward a bit more. "You know… your kinda adorable…" I say lowly to her as I cup her cheek in my hand. She giggles and I give her a side smile before I let her cheek go and lean back in my seat.

I finish my burger and so does she. I start eating my fries and god, I feel better now. Just a bit… dazed. It's probably why I can't concentrate much on Mattie or even on Alice. Soon I stand up and hold my hand out for Mattie. "Why don't I…make you feel better." I say lowly in her ear before I pull away and walk to the bathroom.

I hear footsteps behind me and I lean against the bathroom door until Mattie steps through, and I wind my arm around her waist and move to the large stall. I lock it quickly and start to kiss my way down her neck.

She moans quietly when I trail my hand under her skirt until I'm at her pantie line. I playfully bite her earlobe. "What do you want?" I ask lowly. My eyes are hooded, one thing on my mind. I'm going to get this girl off and I'm going to make her think I'm the greatest thing ever.

"You… I want you." she says and I move my hand to cup her threw her underwear. I start to rub her and I rock our hips to the rhythm of my hand and soon enough she's moaning. I imagine Alice, her small body against mine. I had tucked my hand under her underwear and I had three fingers in her. I'm thrusting my hand against her over and over and all I can hear is her moan as I rock my hips with hers to the rhythm of my hand.

I keep mumbling a silent Alice under my lips, her heat, Alice… my Alice… her moaning my name… Alice… Her screaming my name… her eyes… her hair… her skin… her taste… Alice, Alice, Alice. I shut my eyes tightly as I tuck my head against Mattie's shoulder. "Alice." I mouth as I push against her again.

"Shit… ah, I'm so close." She moans and I smirk against her neck as I push in deeper. I feel her legs give out a bit and I hold her up. "Shit… oh, shit…. ugh… Be-Bellaaaa," she moans as she comes. I keep rocking until she finishes her orgasm. I pull away from her, exiting the stall and going to rinse my hands in the sink.

"Bella, don't you want me to…" she trails off and I shake my head. "I'm good." I say. After all, I used you for my own benefit… I walk out of the stall. I fix my jacket as I walk out of the bathroom, a smirk on my face as I feel Mattie walk behind me and once we are at the desk she plants a kiss on my cheek. "Thank you." she whispers and I wink. "Anytime." I repeat as I make my way back to my table and sit down.

I lean my head back and slowly eat the rest of my fries. I send a smile Mattie's way when I'm give a new beer. I chance a glance at the Cullen table, I see Alice… glaring at me… So much for them not noticing me.

I frown and tilt my head to the side as she suddenly stands and walks over to my table. "Alice." I greet with a nod as I sip my beer. She sits down across from me. "What are you doing?" she asks. I frown. "I'm eating." I murmur pointing at the plate in front of me.

"Why did you just go to the bathroom with that girl?" She asks. I frown. "Er…" I say and eat a fry. "I'm right over there, you expected me not to notice?" Alice asks. I frown. "I didn't think you would care." I admit.

"You suck at assumptions." She snaps and goes to stand up and I grab her wrist and pull her to me and look down at her. "Don't talk to me like I'm the bad guy." I say lowly to her. She shrugs me off. "Then stop acting like a jerk." She says. I smirk. "I still don't see why you care." I say shrugging.

She glares at me for a long moment before her eyes soften and I have to look anywhere but her eyes. I can take her angry eyes, I can take her furious eyes… But I can't take it when her eyes smolder with love or sadness. I cant.

I finish my beer. "I have to go, I need to rest for tomorrow." I say as I walk around Alice and she holds my arm this time. "How long are we going to act like we don't care about each other?" she asks. I frown and look down at her. "Until we don't." I say coolly. Her face shows hurt and I shrug out of her grasp. "Why did you really do it?" she asks and I know she doesn't mean what happened in the bathroom. She means why did I break up with her when her dad asked me to. "I did it for you." I whisper as I move out of the way and out the door.

Once in in the parking lot I kick my tire. "Shit, shit, shit." I growl out. I knot a hand in my hair and open the door. I slam it shut and turn the key, making the engine purr to life. I speed down the street wildly until I reach my street.

I slam down the breaks when I almost miss my turn. I shake my head and slowly go up to my house. I close the door behind me and sigh as I walk to the living room, where I plop down on the couch and hang my head. "Alice…. I love you so much, it hurts…" I murmur as I place my fist against my chest.

"Please… take this pain away from me." I beg to any God that may hear me, if there is one. "Please, I don't want to feel this anymore… I cant." I beg as I feel my tears fall. I can't live… Not without her…

I gasp for breath as my hot tears fall down my face. Why does it hurt so much? Why does it_always _hurt so much that I can't breathe, can't do anything, can't feel anything but the pain? "What did I ever do in this life that was so bad that I deserve all this pain? What did I ever do?" I ask before a sob rocks my body. I put my head on my knees and try to hold myself together as I cry myself to sleep. It's nothing new. After all, it's been a regular occurrence since I lost Alice…

**Apov**

"_Until we don't." _Bella's voice echoes in my head. I rub my eyes as I clean up my tears and I stand from the bed. Why do I have to deal with this pain? It hurts so much to be without her… No. I'll fight for her. I will fight for Bella. Just because she can't fight anymore, doesn't mean that I cant.

"I'll fight for you Bella, until the end." I promise no one as I lay down on my bed. "I'll fight for you." I promise before my eyes close in utter exhaustion.

**A/N: here it is!**


	58. Chapter 58

**A/N: It maybe be sad but I like it =)**

**I don't own twilight.**

**Ch.58**

**Bpov.**

I take shaky breaths, I can do this. I will do this. I nod my head and coach starts to wrap my arms in the Band-Aid's. "Bella, this is it. All night, we just need you to fight with everything you got and we have this in the bag." He says.

I nod twice. "Keep your head down, enter that ring and let the girl get tired out. Then, do your specialty." He says. I smirk to myself and flex my fingers. "Got it." I say as he starts to bandage my other hand.

I can feel a few beads of sweet trickle down my back, I was warming up. I'm still good, I can do this. Coach finishes up my other hand and claps them together; I stretch my fingers and crack my neck.

I take a deep breath. "Let's do this coach." I say and he smiles and hands me my hand gloves. I slip them on and strap them. "Two minutes." A guy says from the door. Me and coach share a look and we walk out of the locker room.

I see my team mates all smiling and grinning as they come to wish me luck, pat me on the back and what not. Some of them really did take a beating. One girl has a broken nose, the other has a busted lip and one even got knocked out.

I smirk as I slide my shades on, it's usual for me to be cocky before a fight, it gets the competitor angry. I walk out of the locker room and I hear cheers. I smirk and salute a few people. I wave to the area where my school is seated on one side of the gym.

My eyes meet Kate and I grin and walk over to her "You did a good job with that girl." I say nodding to the other side. She smiles. "Thanks." She says and I turn and she yells my name. I turn. "Yeah?" I ask. "Make this school proud." She says. I chuckle. "I'll do my best." I say with a shrug and she rolls her eyes as I make my way up the steps to the ring.

Coach holds down the cords and I step in, I smirk and wave at people. I see that the whole Cullen family is here, great. But my eyes lock with Alice's. She gives me a small smile and a thumbs up. I smile and nod at her, _Thank you, beautiful. _I add in my mind as I shake my head and turn. I start pacing around and I see the chick I'm going to fight.

She looks… strong. She has well-toned arms, tan skin, she's as tall as I am. She looks... well, if it were someone other than me she would be intimidating. I smirk at her and lift my hand. "Get ready to lose, darling." I say with a grin. IM being cocky but I need to get her angry so that I can predict what she will be like.

She grins. "I'll K.O. you quicker than you can move." She says and I laugh. "I'd love to see you try." I say with a smirk as I take off my shades and throw them to coach. I give her my 'smoldering' eyes. "Then again, I'd also love to see you naked." I say and my eyes trail up her body.

She stiffens, ha, homophobe. I smirk. "I'm Bella, I just assume you want to know my name for when you moan it." I say with a wink and the girl's eyes go wide in shock. She turns to her coach. "You didn't tell me I was going to fight with a dyke! She's going to feel me up!" she says and I laugh and wag my eye brows.

"I'll do a lot more if you let me." I say and with that I turn back to coach. I go to my corner. "She's homophobic… I need someone to… HEIDI!" I yell as I see her walking to her seat. She raises an eyebrow and saunters over to me.

I smirk as I help her up to the box, I trail my eyes to Alice _Sorry beautiful, but maybe you will get over me this way…_ I put my arm around her waist and pull her to me. "What happened to my good luck kiss?" I ask her sweetly. Heidi smirks. "You just want to freak out that poor girl don't you?" she asks.

I grin. "You know me so well." I joke. She chuckles before leaning forward and kissing me. We make out for a long moment and I know the Forks section cheered along with some guys from the other school.

I make out heavily with Heidi before pulling back. "Thank you." I say and she smirks. "No, thank you." she says and with one more quick kiss she turns and coach holds the cords open for her to slip through.

I grin and look at Coach who is shaking his head I shrug. "She's hot." I say and he laughs and pats my shoulder. "Get your head in the game, Bella." He says and I nod and start to think of strategies. If I make her think that I'm touching her sensually she will get freaked out and will only think about getting me away from her which will cause her to hit me frantically.

She will get tired. Awesome, I grin and turn to look at her... shit, what was her name? Sara I think. "Hey, darling. Aw, don't give me that look, if you want some all you have to do is come and get it." I say with a wink and I blow her a kiss. She blushes furiously before huffing and taking a step forward.

The ref holds her back. "Match will start in one minute, fighters to the middle." He calls with his microphone in his hands. I go to coach and slip my helmet (I hate it, stupid girly girls that wanted the helmet.) and the mouth guard.

I hold it in my hand as I walk to the middle. "You're going down dyke." She says. I smirk. "Maybe on you." I add with a wink as I slip my mouth guard on and winking at her. She huffs and I can see the blush. "Love the blush." I comment as we bang fists.

"Fuck you." she growls and the bell rings. I duck and turn, she huffs and I speed over and hit her on the side of the helmet before jumping back. "Stay still." She growls I nod and stay still as she walks over to me, I gut punch her and punch her helmet once more before shifting.

She stays still for a moment and turns to look at me, I smirk and lift my hands to protect my face I make the hand signal for "Come get it." and she slowly walks over to me, she throws a punch and I block it, she lands a slip punch and hits my shoulder.

She goes for a kick and I hold her foot before pulling her to me. "Sexy." I say loud enough to freak her out before I punch her gut and she falls on her back. She knocks my feet from under me and I land with a smack as she rolls and straddles me. "I love a girl on top." I say and she pauses and I land a hard punch to her gut before she falls off me and I straddle her and punch her helmet four times before the bell rings and I jump off her.

I take a deep breath and walk over to coach. He slips my helmet off, you know the one. The one that only has enough space so that you can see and breath threw your nose and mouth. The only gap is in the middle. It protects your back head, sides and top. It's annoying.

He checks me and I chuckle. "I'm fine." I say as I take a sip of water and he sighs. He slips my helmet back. "Ok, she's freaked out. Just let her tire herself out first." He says. I shrug. "I can knock her out first." I say and he shakes his head.

"She's tough, just let her get tired." He says and I nod and look around the crowd for someone else. "Victoria." I yell and she looks up, I motion for her to come over and once she is on the other side of the cords I wince. "Sorry, I have to do this." I say and kiss her.

She freezes for a long moment before cheers erupt from again Forks High School and the guys from Valley Forest Park. Victoria kisses me back and I grin before pulling away. "You owe me." she says and I wink and kiss her once more. "Get someone else ready for the next round." I whisper to her and she nods before hopping off.

"BELLA, BELLA, BELLA, BELLA" Forks High cheers and I grin and wave at them. Then I hear the Bell ring and I turn on my heels, the girl has a disgusted look on her face. I walk over to her and after bumping fists again the ref blows his whistle. I slide my leg and knock her legs from under her and step back.

She stands and dashes over to me and I side step and she smashes against the cords she bounces back and I trip her, she falls to the floor and I jump to the side to miss her legs. I step back and let her get up again, she walks carefully this time.

I smirk. "Come on sexy." I tease as she huffs and dashes to me. I block her punches. "Shut up." She growls and actually lands a hard punch on the side of my helmet. I step closer to her and gut punch her. When she stagers back I smirk and roundhouse kick her.

She stagers back to the cords and I dash to her and land two hard punches on her face before jumping back. I crack my neck again, shit, she hits hard. I shake my head and jump quick on my feet as I wait for her to stand.

Once she does I do the same, throwing a kick at her leg and punching her lip. She lands a punch on my gut but I act like it was nothing and grab her arm and shove her to the corner of the ring.

I punch her once more and she pushes me back. I fall on the floor but roll with it and land in a crouch. Thank God for da –Charlie's training. I stand up and lift my hands up to my face protecting it. She dashes to me and I push my leg up and slams in to her gut. I crash against the corner bar.

"Uff." I murmur and I try to stand on my leg and I feel the small sprain. Shit. I limp a bit more than necessary. If she thinks I'm week, she'll underestimate me more. I limp on my leg as I circle her. I look at coach quickly to see he looks worried. I look back down to see her getting up.

I wait until she's fully up and punch her face and step back, almost falling. Limp, Bella. Not leg less. I remind myself. I stand carefully and I wait until she jumps forward and I block her kick. I do the same think I had done earlier only this time it fails as she punches me in the face and I stumble to the side and fall.

I roll carefully and stand again and she comes at me and punches me twice before kneeing me in the gut. I fall on my hands and knees as I try to grab a breath. She kicks my back and I smack down to the mat. Shit, shit, shit.

I shift and knock her legs out from under her as I roll away from her and use the ropes to get up. I need to keep playing out the limp card so that I can land a good kick at her. I stand on my leg and I look at coach to see him nervous. Poor guy.

I "limp" over to the girl who's name I forgot and to my side, I wait until she stands up and I 'limp' over and kick her medium, nowhere near as close as I can kick and I act like it hurt me. I limp away from her and scrunch my face up in fake pain. I wait until the girl stand and she launches over to me, I duck from her punch and give her three jabs in the stomach and one right hook.

I receive one left hook in response. We're head to head and I use this to my advantage to freak her out. "If you wanted to kiss me, you just had to say so." I say and lean forward and she jumps away from me. I hold back my smirk and the bell rings.

I 'limp' over to coach and sit on the small stool. Quickly someone starts checking my leg and I whisper to coach. "Faking it, I need her to get cocky." I murmur as I face a wince as the guy stretches my leg. "Ahh." I groan loudly as I crouch over my leg. "Bella, what are you doing?" asks Coach.

"Looking for things I can use to my benefit. She thinks I'm trying to kiss her and she thinks I'm limping. She will get cocky and try to knock me out. Look at her, she's panting." I say and coach chances a glance. I lean my head back and try to concentrate on relaxing.

I drink some Gatorade from the bottle and I see Tanya waiting next to the ring. I chuckle and walk over. "Come on, Blondie." I say as Tanya chuckles and walks up. "Well, I didn't know you could be such a player." She says and I roll my eyes. "Just kiss me and help me freak out that girl." I growl lowly and Tanya slips into the ring and pins me against the cords and kisses me.

Not as many cheers from our school but a lot from the other school. I pull Tanya to me closer and she actually fucking moans into my mouth. I try to hold back a laugh as I turn her around and pin her. "Don't get all clingy now." I warn and she rolls her eyes and steps out of the ring.

I take off my helmet and run a hand threw my hair. My eyes scan over the Forks crowd and land with Alice's. I didn't want to stare at her… I'm transfixed. I look at her with my eyes guarded; I can't let my emotions run me over. I then see a patch of blond next to her and… it's not Rosalie. I look to her side to see Kate plan yet another kiss on Alice's cheek. I frown and can't fight my gaze off her and I see Alice tilt her head and Kate leans in.

I feel my heart stop when they kiss. My eyes find the floor and a shaky breath leaves me. Don't be a hypocrite Bella, you at least kissed more people… but its Alice… I'm supposed to be the fuck up… not Alice...

Fury like nothing I have ever felt, this fury doesn't even compare to the time Kate kissed Alice at the play or when I read Charlie's letter. Immeasurable fury blows in me and I hear Coach call me over. I chance a glance to see Alice's face stare at me with a blank expression. Our eyes lock and I see that her eyes are… sad.

I shake my head. "I don't care." I murmur and the image of her and Kate kissing again passes through my face and I walk over "limping" to coach and I put on my helmet. I have no right to care, she's not mine.

I make sure my gloves are tight and after giving him a nod I 'limp' to the center ring. As soon as the bell rings I throw a hard kick with my 'limp' leg on the side of her stomach. She flies to the side I meet her on the ground and straddle her and punch her repeatedly in the face until the ref pulls me off her.

I'm taking out all my anger on this girl, whose name I can't even remember. **This** is why I fight. I feel my shoulders shake with all the fury I have been holding in all these weeks. Now it's coming out. The ref keeps holding me back until she's standing.

Once she's standing the ref moves and I launch to her. I punch her so hard with one hand that she gets tired in the ropes. I land another kick with my strong leg –the one I was acting limp with- and she falls to the ground. I step away from her to pace.

I'm waiting until she stand up and all I can feel is uncontrollable fury. My shoulders shake with it, the adrenaline in my system making me hyper aware of everything. Making my mind work faster than ever.

My vision is tinted with some red and I don't know if I cut my self with something or if my anger is tinting it. I wait until she's at least standing up and I let her straighten up, I wait for her to try and come at me. I duck under her punch and grab her arm, twist it behind her back and knock her legs from behind.

She smacks onto the mat, and I twist her other hand behind her back and sit on her back. And I stand there for a minute and let go of one arm. I pin her head to the mat and slowly keep lifting her hand until she tries to tap out.

I stand off her. She stand and does as I suspected, she comes at me. Ha, filthy cheater. I punch her as hard as I can in the gut before I grab her by her short shirt and punch her face a few times.

We fall to the floor tumbling and what not until we start landing hard quick punches. I feel a few hits to my face but I don't get cut up. I land a lot of punches to her gut and helmet clad head. I feel her kick me off her and I go over her head and land on my back.

I groan and I see her tumble over to me and I kick her legs out from under her and she falls to the mat. I stand up and kick her so hard she rolls to one corner and almost falls out of the ring. I stand there huffing, I try to straighten up but feel a huge pain spread threw my rib cage.

I wince and squat down a bit again, I take a deep breath and the bell rings. I stay in the middle of the ring. I don't want to sit down, I don't want water… I want to beat the shit out of that chick.

I don't even bother to go find another girl to kiss this round; I stay in the middle of the ring. When I feel a big meaty hand on my shoulder I push it off "I'm fine." I snap at him. He lifts his hands. "Go sit in hat corner Bella, your obviously hurt." He says. I look at him. "No, I said I'm fine. I know how far my body can go. Trust me." I say my voice clipped.

Coach shakes his head and walks over to the corner of the ring, I can tell I pissed him off but he should know. He should know not to mess with me right now. I feel another wave of adrenaline course threw my body as the bell rings again.

I make sure my helmet is tight and walk over to the middle, the girl meets me half way. I smirk but don't say anything. The bell rings, I lift my hands to block her punches, she throws a kick I block it.

I push her leg to the side and step closer to her I gut punch her and she folds. I knee her in the gut and push her to the side so that she falls to the ground. I growl, I take my mouth piece out. "I thought she was supposed to be a challenge!" I call to coach. He chuckles and I slip the mouth peace back in as she stands.

I protect my face as she tries to send a kick to my head. What I didn't expect was to her re-kick me with the other leg sending us both crashing to the ground. I stay on the ground for a second, dazed. I grin as I put my hands over my shoulders and push from my shoulders hopping to a standing position. Yeah, I'm showing off.

I smirk and guard my face as I wait for her to attack, she goes to punch me and I land a hard kick to her thigh. She staggers and I kick the same thigh again and I punch her right at the base of her chest. She stagers back, breathless.

She tries to catch her breath; she had the wind knocked out of her. I turn my back on her as the ref walks over to her and tries to help her catch her breath. I got to my corner and punch the stupid beam holding the cords.

I lean my head on the cords. I take a few calming breaths, I need to calm down. I'm not trying to kill the girl, just win. Wait… since when do I give a shit? I'm Bella fucking Swan. I don't care.

I smirk and turn to see the girl right behind me. She punches me and I stagger to the side, I shake my head and stand again. I don't move I wait until she lands another punch. "Bella, what are you doing!?" I hear coach yell as I let the girl beat the crap out of me.

I land on the floor with a thud, shit that kick hurt. I roll to my hands and knees and stand up slowly and straighten and look at her. She hesitates again before punching me on the side of the helmet, I straighten my face and she punches my gut, my hands are lazy at my side. I hear Forks yelling at me.

"BELLA COME ON!" some yell. "KICK HER ASS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" others yell. "BELLA! BELLA! BELLA!" I tune it out. I feel another kick connect to my gut sending me crashing back to the floor where I groan and roll again to my hands and knees. I stand on shaky legs and take a few deep breaths.

Everything seems to go in slow motion. I see her send a punch and I duck under it and go behind her. I get the girl in a head lock; I hold her tightly and slowly bring her to her knees. "Oh, you think I'm going to knock you out?" I ask. I let her go so quick she doesn't have time to fall before I land a kick on the side of her ribs and she falls to the side.

I take a step back and chuckle as I shake my head; I walk around her we still have two long minutes before the bell rings. She cradles her side and slowly tries to stand. I stand away from her, the ref between the both of us. I smirk to myself as she straightens up and once the ref is out of the way I land a punch so filled with my anger that she just falls to the ground.

I smirk. "Knock out." I mutter with a smirk as I take my helmet off and my mouth piece. I give them to coach and I let the ref count until he walks over to me and lifts my left arm up. I smirk. "Winner!" he yells and I hear Forks go crazy.

I chuckle as I look at Forks with a smirk. My eyes meet Alice's and I see that she has a smile. I look at her blankly before I go and I put one hand on the top cord and jump over it and land on my feet smoothly.

My team rushes to me and hugs me and compliments me and what not. I see Kate nod in my direction and I do the same. I quickly feel unconformable with people touching me and I sneak back to the locker rooms.

I quickly get in a hot shower and I take a mouthful of water and spit it out a bit of blood in my saliva. I rinse my mouth again and again and feel around to see if any of my teeth are lose. It's all good. I lean on the tiles letting the hot water cascade over me.

I'm exhausted; I just want to drink my mind off. I hear someone clear their throat behind me. I turn my head to see Alice standing there. I chuckle. "Hey." I say softly letting the water run over my hair again. Alice chuckles "Hey." She says and I see her lean against the entrance to the shower. "Good fight by the way, congrats." She says. I chuckle. "Thanks." I say, why is she looking at me like that?

I smirk. "Perv." I murmur before grabbing the small towel filled with soap and start to scrub at my skin, taking all the sweat and dirt off me. She chuckles. "It's not like I've never seen you naked, Bell." Alice says. I turn back to see her staring at my ass, I laugh and throw the towel at her, it hits her face and I manage to laugh before I stop myself.

Don't, laugh with her. You're supposed to make her hate you, Bell. I sigh as I look at her. "Can I have that towel back?" I ask and Alice laughs and shakes her head. "Nope." She says and I sigh. "Come on, Al. I need to take a shower." I say and she smirks. "Ok, then." She says and throws the towel back at me.

I catch it and turn my back at her, if you don't see her you won't think about her in **that** way, the good way. Shit, now I'm horny. F-u-c-k me. "So, was the limping, letting her hit you thing all an act?" she asks. I smirk. "The hold thing was, kissing a different girl before every round, the limping, the bugging her, the letting her think she's winning… all of it." I say as I put shampoo in my hair and start washing my hair.

"The girl was a homophobic, cocky, proud, sure of herself and just annoying." I say as I rinse my hair out. "Then why let her beat you up?" she asks. I smirk and spit water out of my mouth "She didn't, I let her think she was." I say and grab the small hand towel and start to rub at my shoulders and arms.

I wipe away all of my dirt and sweat until my skin is red. "You always do that." I hear Alice comment. "Hmm?" I ask as I turn my head to look at her. She's looking at her nails. "You always rub your skin until its red." She says. I frown. "Oh, um… just a habit." I mumble as I wash my face. "A habit you picked up after Connor." Alice says and I can't help the pause at his name.

Alice's voice is... hard. Not the normal soft voice, I sigh. I deserve her hard voice; I deserve her to hate me. I nod and swallow. "Y-yeah… after him." I say and shut the water off. I run a hand through my hair shaking my head a bit to get the water off of it now.

I hear Alice giggle. "You look like a dog." She says. I smirk. "I'm a bitch." I say jokingly as I grab my towel and wrap it around me. I walk out of my stall and to the lockers. Alice follows me.

I chuckle. "What are you doing, Alice?" I ask. As I dry off. She sits on the wooden bench and looks at my eyes. "I miss you." she tells me, her voice so soft it cuts through me. I take a deep breath. "You shouldn't." I say softly as I put on my underwear and bra. "Just because I shouldn't doesn't mean I cant." She says.

I look at her and slide on my Jeans. "What do you want from me Alice?" I ask slipping on my shirt and slowly buttoning it up. "Why do you always ask that?" she asks. I frown and run the towel through my hair. "Because everyone wants something." I say setting the towel on my shoulders as I move a person's space away from her. I grab socks from my duffle bag and slip one on. "Not everyone, Bella." She says.

I scratch my nose and chuckle as I slip on the second sock. "Who doesn't?" I ask tilting my head to the side. "I don't." she says and I smile softly at her. "Of course you don't." I murmur as I slip my boots on. I tie one slowly. "What are you doing here? Won't your parents flip out?" I ask chuckling.

Alice huffs. "I'm not speaking to them." She says. I frown. "Really? Why?" I ask as I finish the first shoe. I slip on the next one and start tying it. "Why? They broke us up. You expect me to just be happy, fine and dandy?" she asks. I bite my lip to hold in a chuckle as I tighten the shoelace.

"Actually, I expected you were over it. Seeing as you were all having a happy dinner?" I say. "Happy? The only person I speak to in the whole house is Emmett and even that is strained." She says. I shrug. "You all looked happy, looked like a family." I say as I stand and run a hand through my hair furiously to get all the water out.

"Then you've never seen a happy family." She says and I laugh. "Actually, I did a few times. Just because my parents died doesn't mean I was born without the proper knowledge of a happy family. I had a good life once. Not everything about my entire life is so god damn dysfunctional." I snap slamming my locker shut.

"You know what really pisses me off after a while?" I ask Alice, my temper flaring. "What?" she asks. "That everyone assumes that just because my parents are dead that I don't have any idea of how a family functions. My mom died when I was ten, not when I was baby. I had a few good years to know how the hell everything is supposed to look like." I say lowly to her.

"Bella, I wasn't attacking you." Alice says and I take a deep breath. "Alice, I can't do this. Ok… I can't just be around you. It sounds stupid but it hurts. It causes me actual physical pain to be around you like this and knowing… knowing that it's my fault your family is strained. I can't be around you because it messes up your family and I know how it feels to have a family falling apart Alice… I can't do that to you. I won't. So call me the enemy but I'm doing all of this for you. I won't let you become me." I say my tone hard, stony almost.

"Bella, it's not your fault this is happening. It's my family's fault and if they want to ruin their own happiness it's their problem, I'm tired of letting them mess with my life." She says standing from her wooden bench. "They are doing what they think is what's best for you. It's what parents and family are supposed to do." I say lowly.

"Then I don't want any." She states and it's like a slap to the face. "How… how can you say that? Don't you know that a few years back I would have killed for a family? I would have killed for the chance to have a mom that loved me and to have a dad that cared enough to worry about me! You're lucky to have a damn family Alice, don't you ever wish you didn't have any!" I yell at her.

She stays there, in shock, from what I said or that I yelled are her I have no idea. But she's shocked. I step closer to her and cup her face in my hands and shake her head. "Don't you ever dare to wish you didn't have a family, Alice. The only reason I wish that now is because I already went through the pain of losing one. And I'm going through the pain of letting you go, so that you don't ever have to feel that pain." I say softly my eyes burning into hers.

My voice is thick and maybe if wasn't speaking so intently at her would let my tears fall but I don't, I let them sting at my eyes. "So, hate me if you want. Let your family hate me. But don't you ever doubt my feelings for you. I never wanted to care for another person the way I care for you because I knew I would go through this pain again. I'm used to it by now, but don't you ever for one stupid second think that I didn't actually do this for you." I say my eyes burning into hers.

I see her eyes glaze as if she wanted to cry, I pull her to me and she hugs me and I hug her. "One of us has the chance to live a happy life Alice. And it's not me." I whisper in her ear. She shakes her head and I shush her. "You'll get over me. Everyone does." I say and grab my bag. I must admit I'm still a bit pissed at her. How she can think that about family is crazy to me. I believe it so because I lost a family, but she still has hers. She still has a family that loves her and I'll be damned if she loses them because of me.

I throw my bag in the trunk and get in the driver seat. I drive out of the parking lot and on my way out my car passes a group of pissed off Cullens. Emmett waves me down; I stop the car and lower the window. "Hey, Em." I say.

"Hey, Bella. I just wanted to say that fight looked good." He says and I chuckle. "Glad I could entertain." I say and he chuckles and leans against my car. "How you feeling, you looked pretty banged up in the ring." He says. I shake my head. "All an act so that she gets cocky." I explain running a hand through my hair.

He grins. "It was one hell of a fight." He says. I laugh and nod. "Yeah, it was, it was fun." I say and he nods. "But are you ok? She did manage to land a few good ones on the ribs." He says his face serious.

I nod. "I'm good, used to it. Charlie taught me how to tell if they are broken or not, they're just sprained. I can just wrap them up at home and head to bed. You going to the party?" I ask.

He shrugs. "I didn't know we would be invited." He says. I shrug. "Just because me and your sister didn't work out, doesn't mean that I will make the Cullens' life hell. Even the pack... I mean Jake, Seth and Leah are invited. Not sure if they will show up but they're invited." I say with a shrug.

He nods. "Alright, I'll be there. When is it?" he asks. I smile. "Tonight, Mike's house." I say. He grins. "Awesome." He says. I wink. "See you all there." I say and with that I change gears and speed out of the lot, my tires leaving marks as I speed down the road to my house.

Parties, they are one of the best things after a fight. To get drunk out of my mind and not care, how great. "God, I need a drink." I murmur as I grab my back from the trunk and droop it on the inside of my house. I sigh as I climb the steps, I need to get ready.

_**A/N: here is the chap! ^_^**_


	59. Chapter 59

_**A/N: Love you're guy's response to the chapters. Hope you enjoy this one. **_

_**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!**_

_**Ch.59**_

_**Bpov**_

I slip on my white long sleeved V-neck, my leather jacket over it. My dog tags, my black skinny jeans and riding boots. I have my spike black and red belt with my chains and my shades in place.

I let my hair straight and I grab my key's as I make my way to my Mercedes. I hop in –yes I took the roof down again- and start the car on again. I roll my shoulders and drive down the driveway_._

I get to Mike's house to hear the music booming. I grin as I park my car far away enough I know no one will mess with it and walk to Mike's house. I pause as I look at the house and lean against the wooden fence and dig in my pocket for a cig, I pop it into my mouth and sigh as I search my pockets for my lighter.

I lean back against the white wooden fence as I light up and take a long slow drag as I rest my head on the fence. I'm dead tired, the only reason I ever come to these things is because I love to get drunk and because I like to get high.

I pull my cig out of my mouth as I leg the smoke out slowly threw my nose as I close my eyes. I sigh lowly, and bring the cig back to my mouth. I take another drag, will Alice be here?... Will she be here with Kate? I grimace and blow smoke out of the corner of my mouth, letting the cig in my mouth.

I take another drag, I shouldn't care. I have no right to care, no right at all. I gave Alice up, she deserves to be happy and if she can be happy with Kate then… I'll have to suck it up. I take a long hard drag and drop the cig to the ground and step on it to turn it off. I blow the smoke out as I make my way to the door.

I open the door and as soon as I do, I'm lifted up on guy's shoulders "BELLA! WOOO, FORK'S HIGH, FORK'S HIGH, FORKS HIGH!" they start cheering as they literally carry me to Mike's living room and I'm set down.

I laugh and fist pup and chuckle as I grab a drink Mike hands me and I sip at it as I talk to everyone and go around. I see the Denali sisters with the corner of my eye but I still don't see the Cullen's. Huh, maybe they won't show up? Kinda better for me if they don't, I can just pretend I never met Alice.

Act, like I'm still the same crazy Bella I was. I sigh, yeah right. I role my eyes as I finish up my drink and dance my way across the living room "dance floor" and to the back yard where the keg is at. I grimace and look for the coolers.

I find the red cooler and open it and grin when I see V-Beer. I grab a bottle and twist the cap off and pull my head back as I down three gulps, "Now this, is what I call beer." I say as I look around the backyard. I find a comfy looking hammock tied under a tarp in between to trees and shrug as I grab the cooler and drag it over there and plant down on the hammock.

I lay down on it and just stay staring at the tarp roof drinking beer. Thirty minutes and four beers later I hear the backyard door slide open (the intense sound of music blaring) and then shutting (the music becomes muffled). I don't bother looking at the door imagining someone is coming over to grab the keg but I hear footsteps on the grass.

I close my eyes as I rock on the hammock with one foot on the ground as I take a swig of beer. "Hello, Bella." A sickly sweet voice asks. I look up to see a fifteen year old freshman Jane Richards standing not a foot away from me.

I nod. "Hey, Jane." I say as I straighten up and stand. "You, know my name?" she asks a bit shocked. I chuckle as I take another swig of my beer. "I know everyone at school, I also know you're too young to be drinking this." I say as I reach forward and take her beer from her hand and hold it with one hand as I look down at her.

"Hey, come on Bella. Give it back." She says with a hint of a smile. I scrunch up my face a bit as I finish my beer and throw it on the grass and bring her beer to my lips and wink at her. "Not a chance. Trust me, at your age a party is a lot more fun when you're sober." I say as I finish her beer and throw it on the grass.

"How would you know, rumors say you've been drinking since you were a kid." She says. I crack a smile. "Exactly why I know drinking at a young age isn't fun. You feel all dizzy and when something goes wrong, they are just going to think you're a kid with a problem and bad shit happens." I say to her my eyes on the cooler as I open it and grab one beer and a can of soda.

I hand her the soda and with a huff she accepts it and I smile I bend down to be at her eye level which is around Alice's size. Maybe shorter. I smile at her. "Trust me?" I ask with a smile, its half faked. She's actually very amusing. She cracks a smile and nods and I grin. "Good, now. What the hell are you doing crashing a senior party? Its social suicide, did anyone see you when you came in?" I ask and she frowns tilting her head.

"Mike invited me." she says. I groan. "No, no, no… that can't be good. When did you get here?" I ask her looking over her shoulder at the party to make sure no one sees her. "About ten minutes ago. I spent some time out front and I passed around the kitchen and out back to grab another beer. Mike and a few girls saw me." she says and I sigh.

"Shit…" I murmur. Mike inviting a freshman is stupid. She can get hurt, or raped. I run a hand through my hair. "Ok, if you leave Mike is going to poke fun. So, I need you to stick to my side ok? Some of Mike's friends are fucked up and they'll try something. Come on, I'll drive you home, did you bring some friends?" I ask.

She nods. "Sarah and Maggie." She says and I nod. "Come on, let's get them before they are made the school clowns. Trust me, stay with your age group when it comes to parties." I say to her as I lead her through the dance floor and out the front door rounding up her friends who are thankfully following me.

I file them in my car quickly and drive them out. "Hey, why are we leaving the party?" Maggie asks. Sarah giggles. "Maybe we're going to have a foursome." She says and I laugh softly. "I can't touch you girls, I'm eighteen and I don't want jail time. Sorry though, you are all very pretty." I say as I drive around town to their houses.

Maggie and Sarah are next door neighbors and are the first to leave. I drive a bit down the road and stop in front of Jane's house. "Here it is, remember what I told you ok?" I ask Jane as she nods and gives me a quick hug. "Thanks." She murmurs and I nod at her as she gets out of my car.

I wait until she's in her house again before speeding down the road to the party. I am going to kick Mike Newton's ass. I park my car in the same space before and slam my door shut as I march into the house and push against the crowd to get to mike. I find him with a beer in his hand and his arm lazily over Jessica's shoulder.

"Hey, Bell. You missed the freshman." He says with a grin. I grab his shirt and shake him once hard. "Are you stupid? What fucking sane person invites little girls to a party like this? They can get hurt you jackass!" I snap at him. His eyes go wide. "Hey, chill. I thought it would be funny." He says.

I push him against the wall. "What kind of a sick fuck thinks hurting little girls is funny? You're a fucking creep Newton! You're lucky those girls don't fucking sue you for sexual harassment and serving alcohol to minors!" I yell at him. He pales at the mention of a lawsuit.

"Yo, man. I just thought it would be funny to see some girls get drunk off the wagon." He says. I slam him against the wall again. "You're just fucking lucky I don't beat the shit out of you Mike." I growl and I feel arms push me away from him. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Bella calm down, it was an innocent mistake." Tyler says to me. I take a deep breath. "How the fuck can you be so stupid!" I say to Mike and turn on my heels and walk away from that stupid drunk bastard before I really lose my temper.

I walk to the liquor table and fix myself something strong, fuck this. I'm getting drunk. I down the drink in three big gulps and groan as it goes down. I clear my though and shake my head. I fix myself another drink and take the bottle of whiskey with me as I make my across to the couch.

I plant myself there and drink my mix from the cup. I watch as everyone dances and laughs and drinks and again I let my eyes scan over. If you haven't guessed I'm looking for a person that is alone that I can steal away for a quickie.

I spot one quickly, sophomore, Lacey Gordon, drunk but not as drunk as I would just let her sleep. I stand up and take a swig from the huge bottle before walking over to her and wrapping one arm around her waist. I pull her to me as we start to grind and I move my lips to hear ear.

"Hey, Lacey." I whisper in her ear. I don't miss the shiver down her spine. I grin to myself as I follow her hips in moving grinding against the crotch of my jeans. I pull her even closer. "You know, I was wondering. What would it take for me to get you upstairs?" I murmur behind her ear and I feel her push her hips against mine again, this time slower.

I smile as she turns her head and starts kissing my jaw line. "That depends on how much time we have." She whispers and I grin as I stretch my neck and give her more access. She turns and we start dancing facing each other, her grinding on my thigh as I grind on hers and then she pushes me softly and grabs my hand.

She leads me to the stairs and as soon as we get there we hear a few cat calls and wolf howls but Lacey ignores them as she leads me to one of the rooms. Mike's parents room, ha, niiice. She opens the door and as soon as I get in she pushes me to the bed. I land and smirk at her. "Someone is feisty." I comment taking another swig of the whiskey bottle.

"Not exactly, I just know what I want." She says as she slides her blouse off. I grin as she reaches for the bottle and brings it to her lips, my head swims the drinks finally getting to me. I take a deep breath and slide my shirt off.

"No bra?" I ask as I look over her naked chest. Shit, she's sexy… not as sexy as Al- cut it the fuck out Bella. You're about to get laid, let the past be just that. Past. Lacey shakes her head. "Why bother? I knew I would eventually climb up here and that's just one less thing to forget about." She says winking.

I gulp. "One more? Are there any other surprises?" I ask as I see her slowly slide her pants down, she fucking went commando. I feel my arousal peek and I can't fight the way my eyes flash up and down her body. Shit, this girl is hot.

Bad Bella bangs on the doors of my mind _'Let me the fuck in!'_ she yells. I struggle, I want to… But, Alice… _"Fucking, deal." _I think as I feel myself retreat in to myself. My darker, more… sinister part coming forward.

Maybe I'm developing split personalities? No, normally one personality does not know the other. Or so I heard… hmmm should look in on that. _"really? you're focusing on split personalities when there is a naked girl right in front of you ready to fuck. No wonder you got pussy whipped." _The bad Bella snarls at me and I shake my head.

I smirk as my eyes skim over Lacey one more time as she straddles my thighs and her hand reaches for the zipper of my pants. She undoes my belt and pants like a pro before she leans forward and starts to plant open mouth kisses on my stomach trailing up.

I lean back on the bed as I let her work me up, I close my eyes. I feel her hand trail behind my back and I lift up and pull her head to mine and start to make out with her as I let her take my bra off. I throw it off the bed like my shirt and shoes. She cups my breast and I grunt softly in to her mouth.

"God, you feel so good." She murmurs against my lips. I bite her lip teasing and turn us around before I slide my pants down until they're off. Lacey is in the middle of the bed just looking at me. I climb on the bed and start to kiss from her thighs to above her crotch to her stomach and ribs until I'm at her breasts.

I start to suck and nibble and tug as she starts to moan. I let my hand trail up and down her body getting her ready, I kiss up to her neck and go back to her lips before breaking the kiss with a pop as I go back to her other breast giving it the same treatment. "Shit, Bella. Don't make me beg." She groans lifting her hips up and I pin her hips down. "Beg?... I want you to whimper with want." I growl against her neck before slapping her clit.

She throws her head back in a moan as I start to lay hicky's on her neck. "Fuck, Bella please." She begs me and I chuckle as I go to her ear and bring the bud to my mouth. "So much for not begging huh?" I tease as I trail my hands up her inner thighs. She lifts her crotch and I brush against her folds, I stop and start to tease her.

"Bella." She whimpers and I smirk against her neck as I slide two fingers in her. And well, the rest of just natural instinct. A sweaty fucking good mess. After I finish off my orgasm I sit up on the bed. Lacey starts to kiss up my neck and I lean back and let her before kissing her lips once more, that taste like my arousal and stand from the bed.

"Damn, forgot how quick you really are." She says and I shrug. "It's a party Lace, my plan is to get as much pussy as I can handle… which is a lot." I say with a grin as I slide my underwear on and my pants up, my belt clanking as I fist it up right. I slide on my bra and shirt and jacket. I grab my socks and slip them on and slide my boots on before tying them.

Lace is tangled in the sheets still. I lean over to her and kiss her a few times. "You were fucking amazing, thank you. I hope you will allow me this pleasure again sometime." I say as I pull away. She smiles and ruffles my hair. "Sure, Bell. Now get out of here, I need to find a girl." She says and I laugh as she stand and starts getting dressed. I lean on the wall with the bottle back in my hands and take a few swigs.

"Come on." She says as she slips on her heels and I smirk and walk out of the room, her behind me. I walk with her down the stairs and right as I take the last step, I am face to face with Rose and Alice. G-r-e-a-t. I grin. "Hey." I say and I feel Lacey kiss my neck. "Thanks again Bella." She says and I wink at her as she walks away from me. I bring the bottle to my lips and look back to see Alice looking at the ground and Rose lifting an eyebrow.

I smirk at her. "Sorry, Rosie. I don't owe you an explanation anymore. So, later." I say with a click of my tongue. I see Alice take a step back and I lift her head up. "Smile, Beautiful. It's a party after all." I say and Alice pushes my hand away from her. "Fuck off, Bella." She mumbles.

I chuckle and lift my hands. "Hey, I'm just trying to be nice." I say with a grin. In case you haven't noticed… whiskey, yeah, it makes me drunk and crazy like that *snap fingers* "No, you're being a douche bag." She says glaring. I glare back, what is with her? she knows better then I do that we are not together.

I chuckle lowly as I step closer to speak in her ear. "Sure I am. You need to get used that this is me, Alice. Its just who I am, its who I have always been. Your good Bella... she woke up from that stupid dream. Maybe its time you wake up from yours." I say as I turn my back to her and walk away. Drink, I need a drink. Oh, wait… I have a bottle of whiskey. Ok… I need a smoke. Yeah, that's what I need. I walk out the front door and to the porch, a wave of fresh cold crisp air hits me. I grin, I needed that to wake up a bit.

I take a cig out and light up and smoke it slowly again. Ok, so Alice is mad… good thing is… Good Bella is nice and sober in the bottom of my mind. Now... Bad Bella. Oh… she's coming out to play. I smirk and finish my cig and throw the useless filter to the wet grass. I walk back in and I hear yelling and hollering. I go to a table to see body shots, I feel my self grin wolfishly as I see Heidi step forward. I push a sophomore guy out of the way and grab the shot, I smile at Heidi and i tilt her head and lean forward, placing a long open mouth kiss on her neck.

I grab the salt and pour it on her neck and I let her return he favor I grab one slice of lime and hold it in my hands and I take my shot Lean over and lick Heidi's neck, pull back to let her do the same and place the lime wedge in my mouth only to have Heidi lean forward and try to steal it. I kiss her until i throw the lime wedge around somewhere and pull away. "Next." Heidi says and I grin. Party's... Party's are fun.

While later, when im good and drunk. I make my way to the living room to see Alice and wouldn't you know it Kate dancing… yeah. Fun. I lean against the wall as I watch Alice grind against Kate. _Stupid good Bella, you brought this on yourself. _I think as I shake my head and take a swig of the beer in my hand before making my way out back to the coolers. I throw the bottle on a table and grab a cold Beer.

I look for the bottle opener and pop the cap off. I take a long big gulp of beer. "Ah.." I murmur licking my lips. I chuckle and shake my head "Stupid emotions." I murmur as I swish the reminder of my half beer. I smirk "Let's see how much fun emotions are, eh Alice?" I ask as I swallow the reminder of my beer.

I throw the bottle to the grass and stumble to the house. I see Tanya and pin her to the wall as we start making out. I get bored of her exaggerated moaning, it's me not a porn video. I walk away from her and look around until I find a red dress. I smirk. "Heidi." I say with a grin.

She turns, her –wow…. This girl looks… damn. I smirk a bit at her. "Wow, Heidi. Trying to steal my heart?" I ask smiling at her. She chuckles. "If you had one, maybe." She says and I place a hand over my chest. "You hurt me woman." I say and she winks.

I shrug my shoulders. "Care to dance?" I ask and she shrugs and we walk to the "Dance floor" as start to grind against the bodies and her. After a while Heidi moves on to walk around and I have my fun. I start a pattern. Look for a cute girl, dance, flirt, tease, drink and fuck. Hours pass and this pattern still works like a charm.

I do that a few times witch causes me to sleep with: Tanya & Marina, Alison, Daisy & Jade, Sasha and now, im working on getting Heidi. A big plus is that I had two threesomes. What straight guy wouldn't wish to be me right now? Heidi and I dance and soon enough we are just making out on the couch, a bit more and we would be dry humping. I hear, hollers and cat calls and when I look up I see the guys holding up a tape and Tanya reaching for it. I frown and pull a bit away from Heidi to see the guys turn of the music.

"Tanya brought a porno!" they guys chuckle. I laugh and stand up. "No fucking way, Tanya. Naughty girl." I say shaking my finger at her. She gives me a small grin. "Sure, yeah." She says and I laugh as I see the plasma screen on the wall turn on and the first thing I notice is that it's a dark image.

I chuckle as I hear everyone either go to the next room or quiet down. "Oh, God!" I hear a moan. I frown… that voice sounds familiar. "Bellaaaaa" I hear the voice moan and I choke on the drink in my hand. "Tanya!" I laugh as I make my way to the DVD player. "Sorry guys there is no way you're going to watch me in action." I say as I move over and I'm held back by the guys.

"Oh, come on! We could learn some skills from you." The guys say. I shrug out of their grasps and move over to the DVD when something catches my eye. _"It's just that she gets so protective! It's insane." _Alice's voice comes on threw the TV.

I step back from the DVD to see Alice walking in a library. I hear a few 'oooh's. but I ignore them. I look at the TV, a girl steps forward... Kate. _"Well, maybe she's just controlling like that. I mean, a person like Bella? She's used to being in control all the time, it's her thing." _Kate's voice comes through the speaker.

I frown as I watch. "Shut it off." I hear Alice say to the guys. I shake my head "I'M watching this." I say to them and they nod. "Come on guys that's a private conversation." Kate says and I smirk but continue to look at the screen.

"_She's not like that, I mean. She's sweet and funny… she has her romantic side… it's all in layers. Everyday it's like meeting a new person, she's… so complex. Sometimes I think I may not be enough to hold her." _Alice's voice is soft. I frown, why the fuck was this in a DVD from Tanya that starts like a porno? Where the hell are Kate and Alice anyway?... why are they talking about me? _"Like, today. I went over before this stupid diner party to hang out and the first thing we do is fight... im just... im so tired of fighting.."_ I hear Alice whisper. I frown, ouch... this... doesn't make sense, why does Tanya have this?... Is she trying to bug Alice by doing this?

Oh, I get it. Tanya's trying to humiliate Alice. Fuck. I walk over to the DVD and take the DVD out. I snap it in my hands as I throw it on the floor. "It was my only copy!" I hear Tanya yell. I shrug and step over it, crushing it even more. "Don't try to humiliate people Tanya, it only makes you look pathetic." I say as I walk past her and sigh.

"I'm leaving guys. I'm tired as hell. Bye." I say as I walk out. I hear Alice yell after me but I act like I don't hear her and get in my car. I shake my head to clear it as I drive off. I shake my head, im freaking trying to make her stay away from me. For her to hate me, curse the moment Alice is so... nice that she doesn't really care that I hurt her. This is to much, I need to head home, sleep and fuck, I just really need some sleep.

**A/N: wow, close one huh?**


	60. Chapter 60

**A/N: Hey ppl!**

**I do not own twilight!**

**Ch.60**

**Bpov. ~one week after the party~**

Two words for a hang over? They suck. Two words for my life? It's fucked. Two words that were running in my head at this very moment? I'm hungry. If you guessed any of them… you're a smart little fucker.

I groan as I struggle to stand up from the floor in front of the toilet. I have been awake for an hour and I still have a monster headache. That may be because I haven't eaten anything and I have been puking my guts out.

I rinse my mouth and gargle with some mouthwash; I run a wet hand through my hair pushing it back. I grab some pills for the head ache and I look at the bottle of Valium. I know I should probably take them, keep myself out of depression but… why bother? I don't have friends, I don't have a girlfriend.

I just have me, myself, and I - and I hate all three of them. I put the pills back in the cabinet and walk down stairs. Damn, my body hurts. I don't know if it's because of the obsesive work out or about all the sex I had. Shit, I'm exhausted.

I walk down to the living room; I have a white wife beater, blue jeans and socks on. I walk to the kitchen and grab a bowl and eat cereal. I wash my bowl and walk to my living room and just sigh in boredom. "I have no life." I murmur with a groan.

I feel my mind start to wander on a familiar trail, a trail I am so tired of going through but yet, I want so badly to go through.

Before Alice, I had the pack. And I put my whole life into that. I gave it my everything. Seth, Leah and Jake are like a family for me. Yet… I pushed them away. They got tired of my crap. Who can blame them? I mean, even I am tired of my crap.

Alice… I gave my everything to Alice. I put all of my time and effort into that relationship. And for what? To just throw it away when I couldn't handle it anymore? To let it go when I had enough?... I'm pathetic. I'm not worth this effort.

I continue my guilt trip until a knock on my door breaks my focus. "Coming." I yell as I stand up and walk over to the door. There standing are Tanya, Irina and Heidi. I sigh and push the door open and walk back to the living room.

"Why hello to you, too." Tanya says as I hear the door shut and three sets of feet walking over to me. I lay down on the couch. "What do you want?" I ask. "Nothing, we just wanted you to see something." Heidi says. I sigh and open my eyes and sit on the couch.

Irina walks over to the TV and sets it up. Heidi sits on my side, almost on my lap. Tanya sits next to me and Irina sits at the side of Heidi. "Watch the whole video please. It will show you everything you need to know." Heidi whispers in my ear and the way she breathes against my neck makes me shudder.

"Alright." I murmur as I look as Irina pushes a button on a control and a video starts.

"_She's guarded, but she's so open with me. I'm just afraid she will close off." Alice says. Kate shrugs and puts an arm around Alice. "Hey, don't worry, you got me." she whispers quietly. Alice nods her head and leans against Kate._

_Kate suddenly lifts Alice's head up and kisses Alice. Kate is kissing Alice and Alice, for a moment, kisses her back before suddenly pushing her away. "I can't, Kate. Bella..." she says shaking her head. "Alice, Bella doesn't care about anyone. I doubt you are the exception to that rule. She's not a person to care about people, about anyone. You told me about that chick at the Café. Who knows who else she's flirted with, or even worse. She's not known for being faithful Alice." Kate says stepping closer._

_Alice shakes her head. "No, Bella would tell me. I know she woul-" she's cut off by Kate kissing her again. Alice freezes before she pushes Kate back and her necklace breaks. "Alice, baby, what's wrong?" Kate asks. Alice shakes her head. "I need… I need a smoke. Just... leave me alone Kate." Alice says before pushing past Kate and going out the door._

_Kate runs a hand through her hair and the video goes black._

"Bella..." Irina's voice is soft. I feel a lump in my though that doesn't let me speak clearly. "When was this?" I ask quietly. "It was at the dinner party." Tanya says. I feel the air leave my chest. "Get out." I manage to say. "Bella, don't be silly." Heidi says. I clench my jaw shut. "I said. Get. Out." I say and I see Tanya and Irina stand. Heidi stays on my lap.

"Bella, we just though you should know..." Heidi says and I laugh. "Sure you did, it had nothing to do with wanting to fuck me over. Get the fuck out of my house!" I yell standing up and actually pushing Heidi off me. I stand there trying to control my breathing. I am on the very edge right now and if any of them push me I am going to lose it.

They leave quietly and I just stand there re-watching the video until it gets to them kissing again and pause it. The dinner party, the same one I didn't want her to go to. The same one we fought over because I didn't trust Kate. I shut the TV off and grab the small camcorder and hold it in my hand as I get in my car and drive to the Cullens. She is going to explain to me what the fuck is happening.

I screech to a halt in front of the house and get out of my car, I close the door with a loud bang I'm in too much of a hurry to actually care. I bang on the door and take a step back, I try to make my features into a calm mask. The door opens to reveal Emmett. "Oh, hey, Bells. What's up?" he asks smiling at me.

I give him a small fake smile. "Hey, Emmett. I was wondering if there was any chance I could speak to Alice quickly. I need to give her something she left at my house." I say. He smiles and nods. "Sure, she's in her room." He says and steps to the side. I nod to him and go up the stairs quickly until I reach Alice's bedroom. I open it not caring what the hell she is doing and close it behind me.

"So much for knocking Em. I told you to… Bella." Alice says in a voice of shock. I lean against the door I stare at her with a hard face, not a glare just… guarded. I throw the camera on the bed. "Watch that video." I say. "What?" she asks. I look at her. "Grab the stupid camera and watch the video." I say and she walks to the bed and sits down. I sit down behind her and put my head on her shoulder and turn on the camera and select the video.

"Oh, that's my favorite part." I murmur and Alice and Kate kiss in the video. "Bella." Alice says softly. "Shh, you're missing the best part." I say and they kiss again. I get off the bed and lean against the door. "So, you were mad that I flirted with Tina so this was your way of getting even Alice? I had the balls to tell you that I almost cheated but didn't… and you took that as me actually doing it and you wanted to get even?" I ask.

She stay's paralyzed on the bed with the camera in her hands. "Bella, it's not how it happened." She says. I laugh. "Then enlighten me, Alice. Because I am at a dead loss." I say looking at her eyes. She won't even meet mine.

"Look at me Alice." I say. She meets my gaze, her eyes glassy. "Why did you never tell me." I demand rather then ask. "I-I couldn't. I was afraid you would leave me." she says. I laugh softly. "You think I would… You thought I would fucking leave you!?" I yell not being able to handle this ridiculous conversation. I take a deep breath and clench my jaw.

"Yes, I thought you would have had enough of my bullshit and leave me." she says. "Then you obviously didn't know me the way I thought you did, Alice. You could have told me anything and I would have freaking brushed it off. None of that shit mattered to me if I still had you. What kills me is that you didn't trust me enough to tell me and I have to find out by Tanya, Irina and Heidi." I say loudly to her.

"It was a set up!" Alice yells at me. I laugh. "Like I don't know that? Like a camera will be randomly placed to see if people are going to walk through. I knew it was a fucking set up, but what pisses me off is that you - " I say pointing at her. "You didn't tell me!" I yell taking a few steps closer to her. "I… I don't even have anything left to say to you." I say softly as I close my eyes and sit on the corner of the bed and put my head in my hands.

"I'm sick of fighting. I'm sick of feeling this fucking hurt. I just wanted to hear your explanation and I'm out of here." I say my voice exhausted. "Bella… she kissed me and I pulled away twice. I thought of you instantly. That has to count for something." She says softly. I sigh and nod. "It's alright, I don't care. I'm just mad that they had to tell me instead of you." I say.

"I was going to tell you when you got back from Italy but…" she trails off. "Everything went to shit and you didn't think it was worth hurting more?" I ask my voice still showing how tired I really am. "Exactly." She says. I nod and stand. "That's all I wanted to hear." I say and walk out the door.

"Bella!" I hear Alice call after me. I don't turn and keep walking down the stairs. "Will you fucking grow up for one second and talk to me! You can't keep walking out after you're tired of listening!" she yells. I laugh and walk down the last of the steps. "What is there left to say Alice? What, did you fuck her too?" I ask turning to look at her.

She huffs. "No, I didn't fuck her." She says and I laugh. "Could have fooled me." I snap at her as I walk across the loft and open the door to see… Wouldn't you fucking love this timing - Kate. "Really? And you two aren't fucking?" I ask as I push Kate back and walk around her.

"Kate, what are you doing here?" Alice asks and I stand on the porch. "My sisters told me that they showed Bella. I wanted to be here just in case this happened. Guess I came a bit late." She says and I glare at her. "Fuck you." I growl at her.

"Hey, if you didn't neglect your girlfriend it would have never happened." She says and I laugh. "Really? If I hadn't ignored her… what if you were not such a cunt and got in the middle of a relationship none of it would have happened." I snap. "Watch your mouth, Bella." Kate growls.

I smirk. "Struck a nerve? What, you get mad when I call you a cunt?" I ask glaring at her. Kate takes a step forward. "Shut up." She growls. "You're just a little cunt, just like you sisters and your fucking cougar mom." I growl and I feel Alice stand in between the two of us.

"Stop, Kate I don't need your help. In fact, I don't want to see you ever again. You set me up. That's just sick." Alice growls. Kate opens her mouth and I smirk. "You should listen to Alice, Kate." I say. Kate opens her mouth again but Alice cuts in. "Get lost, Kate. And forget about me being your friend." Alice growls and Kate shrugs.

"Hey, at least I got to fuck up Bella's life." She quips and I take a step forward but Alice stops me. "She's not worth it Bella." She says and I shrug Alice's arm off and push Kate off the porch. "Get lost, Kate." I say and Kate stands from the floor and walks over to her blue Toyota and leaves.

I look at Alice for a long moment. "I never expected you to actually do something with Kate." I say and Alice steps forward "Nothing happened." she says and I shake my head. "We were together for two weeks after that dinner party, and you didn't think that was... oh, I don't know, enough of a time span to tell me the truth?" I snap at her.

"I was going to tell you." she says and I boom out a yell. "When? Alice, fucking when? When your stupid ignorant parents finally accepted me? Then? Or would you wait until we were in college or even freaking married! When the hell were you going to tell me!" I yell getting in her face. My anger blurring my mind, I don't think I have ever been this angry in my life. I take a deep breath and walk away from her just as Carlisle and the whole family burst out the front door.

"What is going on here? Bella, what are you doing here?" he asks. I glare. "Nothing, nothing's going on... and I was just leaving." I say looking at him with the corner of my eyes with a hard face. I look back at Alice and go to turn when she hops down the steps "Bella." she states. "No, Alice. I'm done, I can't do this." I say shaking my head looking at her.

"All my life, I knew letting feeling out was something I could never do. So, I never showed emotion. I parted from them, then people started saying that it would hurt me in the end if I kept doing that. That feelings had to be expressed and that it would hurt me if I never felt anything. So, Alice. I want to know what the hell is so great about feeling? Honestly, tell me right now. Because all I feel, all I have always felt is fury and pain. And I was a fool to think that I could actually fall in love, I'm too damaged." I finish my rant. At the beginning it had started off angry but at the last three words my voice became soft.

"You should listen to your father and stop acting like a little spoiled brat." I say to her. Alice jaw clenches and her hands ball into fists. "I'll stop when you stop acting like a scared child and let your true self come out," she quips and I boom out. "I grew up the day I saw my mom get killed! The day I had to take care of my drunk of a father and the day I saw him die! And I sure as hell grew up the day that fucker raped me!" I snap angry at her. Alice's eyes go wide and her mouth falls open and I feel the anger in me simmer down at the fearful look in her eyes.

I can feel my pulse booming in my head, my blood pressure must be up the roof right now. "Don't you ever dare tell me to grow up. I've been taking care of myself since I was ten, Alice. Ten years old. You think you're hurt? You don't even know what hurt feels like, Alice. So stop acting like you're in this stupid fairytale and that a person can come here and make it all better because no one will show up and you will be disappointed time and time again. Ask anyone and they'll tell you - I'm that person that will keep letting you down." I say softer as I struggle to maintain my composure.

I take a deep breath to calm down a bit more and I see the look of utter shock and pain in Alice's eyes. I turn to her family, who I actually forgot were standing there. "I'm sorry I disturbed your afternoon, I'll be on my way now. Everyone." I say with a nod and turn to Alice to see her just staring at me with a sad expression. "I'm sorry." she whispers. I feel my lip twitch in an anger/amusement sensation. "For what? You just proved my point. Emotions are useless." I say with a shrug.

"I'm sorry I kissed Kate while we were together." she says and I feel pain in me. I take a long breath. "So am I." I say and walk back to my car and get in. I pull out of the car speeding, I get to my house and jump out o the car and run up to my room. I grab a duffle bag, I can't do this_. I can't do this, I cant. I give up, I can't... I give up._ I repeat in my head as I put clothes in the duffle bag. I put some boxes of cigs my pills and I pop in two valium.

I walk down my house shutting off everything. I lock my door behind me and throw the bag in my car. I need peace... The sad part is I left every bit of peace that I've felt since I was ten years old at the Cullen house, and I ruined my chances by breaking her more then she broke me. I'm so destructive. Everything I touch I destroy. Everything I want to care about, I end up breaking. I shouldn't live. Nope, I should never have been saved all those times that life almost killed me.

I should have died with Mom that night. I should have died at the hands of Connor. I should have died when I almost over dosed. I should have died when that car crashed into my bike. I should have died that time I got mugged. I should have died... so why didn't I?

Shit, I really wanted that answer. I needed that answer...

**A/N: yeiiiii chapter! eh.. not my fave but its better than the first draft**


	61. Chapter 61

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait, no inspiration is hard to deal with. Love your responses and reviews! Lol, here is the next one.**

**I do not own twilight**

**Ch.61**

**Apov**

"I'm sorry I kissed Kate while we were together." I whisper brokenly to Bella. And God only knows how true my words are. How I truly and fully regret what happened and not telling her. If I had told her none of this would have happened, and I know it's true. She would have brushed it off. But now, now that she heard from someone else… that hurt her more. Then again, saying that she is acting like a child has always been known to piss her off.

I see her look down at me, her face blank of all emotion except for the undertone of anger that I could see in her jaw line. The tension there and the way she was still rigid, as if monitoring herself to do something she didn't want. But, whether that was from yelling at me about her past or the situation in general I shall never know. Perhaps… a bit of both.

Her now empty eyes meet mine, the hollowness and just the pure… broken and lost look, in them scared me half to death. She looked so fragile, yet she still stood tall and proud. A lot like a wolf - even though wounded, it would never back down. She would not allow herself to crumble, at least not in my presence. And let alone in my family's presences. I broke her… and I pushed her to far… maybe… maybe I should just let her go?

Shit, her eyes looked so tormented, fragile… haunted. Yes, that was the only way to explain her eyes at the moment. They were haunted and it was my entire fault. She looked like I had burned her at the stake, a burning person. She was being eaten alive by this, and so was I.

I still don't understand how I was still standing in her presence, I feel like crumbling to the floor. It's her, Bella. The strong look in her eyes, even besides the hurt… that's what's keeping me standing. It's the only way...

"I am too," she says, her voice with an undertone of anger but her voice sounded exhausted, like she just wanted to sleep for a hundred years and not be bothered. My girl, my beautiful Bella… If you only knew how much I wanted to do the same.

She walks over to her car and speeds out of the driveway and as soon as she is out of sight I fall to the ground crying. I fucked up, I fucked up and now my chance is over. She's broken, worse yet I broke her. After I promised her a thousand times that I would never… I broke her.

I feel the strong arms of Emmett wrap around me and I hide my head in his neck as the sobs wrack my body. "Shh, its ok pixie. Its ok, we can fix this." He sooths, his words quiet as he hugs me to him, his strong arms keeping me together. "E-Emmett! S-she hates me. S-she hates me." I sob in to his neck and he hugs me impossibly closer.

"She doesn't hate you, Bella can never hate you. She's just… hurt. She's a bit lost Al, but she is incapable of hating you." He sooths and I feel him lift me up in to his arms and start to walk. I don't bother looking , not really caring where we go.

I suddenly feel Emmett laying me down on my bed and laying down next to me and pulling me to him. "Shh, go to sleep. I'll be here and everything is ok." He whispers to me and after a few minutes of letting my sobs free I finally succumb to sleep.

I wake up I think a few hours later, its pitch black outside and I can hear Emmett's faint snore as he holds me tight to his chest. I snuggle in deeper into Emmett. He really is the best brother out there. He loves me and protects me from anything and throughout this whole Bella thing… he's the only one who supports me and understands what I feel. Emmett really is the perfect big brother.

Jasper is great too, but he is just like Rose. He doesn't see much past protecting his family and Edward… Edward is just too ignorant (which is weird in a gay man) to actually think about how I am feeling. He is such a drama queen.

After half an hour, I get out of Emmett's grasp when Emmett wakes up and starts to poke my sides. We walk quietly together to the kitchen and grab a small snack. I'm making my way back to my room when I hear Carlisle's voice.

"Alice, would you mind speaking with us for a minute?" he asks. I sigh and look at the family aligned in the sofas, even Emmett is sitting down next to Rose with a plate filled with food in his hands. I lean against the frame of the wall. "What?" I ask my voice soft, exhausted, broken.

"Alice, we are just wondering about a few things we heard Bella mention outside when she was here." Esme speaks quietly. I shift form foot to foot. "That isn't my business to tell." I say and Rosalie sighs. "Alice, anything that caused you to just freeze up like that when she started yelling is our business." She says. I sigh. "Why do you care? You have your wish, Bella hates me. She's hurt and leaving. What is there left of me to give you?" I quote Bella.

She has such a wonderful way with words. Her words which were always velvet and ice, and now are full of harsh metal and fire. Bitter and cold. Fiery and warm. "Alice, we aren't here to fight. We just want to understand…" Esme trails off.

I run a hand through my hair, should I tell them?... It's not like she's coming back to me… No, I think that is a wonderful way to give up. I shake my head to clear it, I am not giving up on Bella. She's just… retracted back into her spiky, hard, venomous shell. "What do you want to be sure about?" I ask warily as I step in to the room. I take the empty recliner.

"What did she say about her mother?" Esme asks. I sigh. "You all do know, anything I say stays in this house. I'm not joking, it doesn't leave this room." I say and everyone nods. I run a hand lazily through my hair with a tired sigh.

"When Bella was ten she wanted to go to the park. Her dad had bought her this cool new airplane that she could fly around and she wanted to play with it. So, she begged her mom to take her. Her dad wasn't home so her mom didn't want to go alone but Bella wanted it so bad. She wanted to play and fly her plane that looked so much like her dads plain in the pictures, so Renee – Bella's mom – drove her to the park. When it was starting to get late, they got in their car to go home and when they stopped at a red light… some guys ran up to the car and carjacked it." I whisper feeling tears in my eyes.

"Oh, dear." Esme whispers her hand in her heart. I sniff. "W-when her mom saw that they were holding Bella, she jumped forward to grab her and the guy panicked and Renee was hurt badly. They took the car and left Bella and Renee in the middle of the street. Bella… she didn't know what to do besides calling 911 and holding her hands on the wound…. And slowly…. Slowly she saw her mom die… She blames herself… She thinks it's her fault, that if she had left earlier with her mom that they would have been safe. That if she had paid attention to her dad when he talked about the war that she could have known what to do…" I murmur with a broken whisper.

"Oh, my God." I hear Emmett whisper as he pushes his half-filled plate on the coffee table. "That's so sad." I hear Jasper say. "She… she blames herself for her mother's death, what a shame." Esme murmurs. Carlisle just has a sad expression and Eddie is frowning and holding Jazz's hands.

"And… her father?.. He was a drunk?" Carlisle asks. His doctor face coming forward, I scratch the back of my head. "Err… Bella never told me exactly that he was a drunk before tonight… she always said he was very depressed and drank every once in a while and that him being so… unfocused she had to learn how to keep the house. She was home schooled by her mom so her dad just hired someone to teach her at times. Mostly he would teach her about business and financial stuff." I say and Esme frowns.

"A child has no business learning such things at a young age." She says. I frown. "Bella's… she's really smart mom. She used to clean and cook for her dad and whatnot while he payed the bills and then she would go to her library where the teacher would be set up and she would absorb everything he taught her. She was in an advanced placement and she has a photographic memory." I say sounding a bit like a proud mother.

I sigh and run a hand through my hair "She never focused too much on the topic of her dad but…. He was her hero. She looks up to that man so much. She wanted to join the army – that was before her dad was diagnosed with cancer – she wanted to be just like him… I remember she mentioned something about how he took care of her." I murmur trying to remember what it was exactly.

"She said that, sometimes she was the parent while her father was down or in that blur at times… I didn't know that blur or that him being down was him being drunk. I do know for certain she did take care of him, right after her mom died she took care of him." I say and Esme looks… appalled.

"She had to take care of her father! It was his job to care for the girl, especially after her seeing her mother die. What…. What an appalling thing." Esme says her voice laced with a hint of anger. Carlisle sighs. "Most men, when getting back from the army… they aren't the same Esme. Most of them end up killing themselves, he couldn't do that with Bella still in the picture… he most likely fell into a catatonic placement." He says with a shrug but his face still showed the disapproval for the man known as Charlie.

I shake my head. "He was a good man, mom. He cared deeply for Bella, but also like Bella… he was very guarded and didn't show much affection. Of course Bella changed after a while, but I bet his wife dying just made him close up more… You should hear the way Bella speaks of him… The pride that leaks into her words when she speaks of her hero… and a hero he really was." I murmur more to myself.

"Yes, he fought for a lot of innocent people. Very honorable." Jazz says sending a look to Dad. I bite my lip, here comes the unpleasant part. Not that disclosing Bella's past is pleasant in itself but… you get what I mean.

"That's not what I meant, but I'll get to that later." I say sadly, my eyes trailed on a small stain in the white carpet. "Charlie was diagnosed with Cancer when Bella was sixteen. He hadn't planned on telling her… she was cleaning the house when she stumbled upon a letter in the trash, thinking it was something related with work she opened it and read it over… She found out that Charlie was dying of cancer. He went through a year of radiation to see if he could get better but… nothing seemed to be working and when she read that Seattle had a clinic she packed everything up and asked Charlie what he wanted to do." I say.

"He said he wanted to live out his last years in the town where he had fallen in love and grew up… so they moved to Forks. Bella spent a year with Charlie on and off again in school while she helped him with all of the therapy. And for a while he actually looked better like he would make it… Sadly, he took a turn for the worse half a year after he was dispatched form the clinic." I say as I feel my fists ball up in pain for Bella.

"She had found her dad laying down on the couch cold as could be, coughing up blood. So, she took him to the hospital and after waiting a few nights… They told him he had taken a bad turn and that he only had a few months left. Bella… Bella took it like a soldier. In stride, she made all the arrangements needed to make sure her dad didn't have to worry about anything and she put on this mask…" I murmur feeling the tears leak out.

"She acted like nothing was wrong and she would visit Charlie every day. She actually took a leave from school and they would just send her exams and assignments to her. She spent every day with him. She would play guitar, piano, read, talk… Sometimes, when he was too tired to do anything she would just sit there and watch him sleep… and she would think…. S-she would think…. 'Ho-ow am I going t-to live all a-alone?' and she would even ponder killing herself right after her dad…" I trial off as a sob takes me over and I feel the comforting muscular arm of Emmett hug me.

I take a deep breath and a moment to sort through all of my thoughts. "She was in a dark place… but she never let anyone catch on to it. She would act like nothing was wrong and she was there the day he died. She was playing guitar to him when he told her to stop and lay with him. She did and he handed her an envelope telling her to open it when she was ready… and he slowly started to drift." I say taking a shake breath.

"And… she held him. She hugged him to her until he took his last breath…. Something she didn't mention when she was here was how she almost killed herself." I mention quietly. "She what?!" I hear Emmett and Rosalie boom out.

I frown still looking at the stain. "I told you… after her Dad died, she was in a dark place. She almost went into foster care if she had not bought her way out of the system and Jenks was her 'Guardian'." I mock the word. "She made Jenks take care of the company and she went to the mandatory therapy where they assessed she was depressed and assigned her pills…" I say shaking my head.

"She, she somehow found a good mix to kill her… something that wasn't obvious but was clearly intended. She picked up Kick boxing, she picked up drinking, and… and she picked up sex and drugs." I say lower.

"Her therapist had told her how sex could work with depression and…. Somehow…. It made her feel in control. She is freaked out when not in control of a situation, which is reasonable considering her past. But, sex… in her words 'made me feel like I had a purpose, to give pleasure to people who will never understand my pain.' I think she meant that even though she wouldn't feel the same way, even if she wouldn't feel as good it made her head go blank and the only think that existed was her and the other person…. Then kick boxing…" I say shaking my head a small smile tugging my lips.

"She was an excellent fighter thanks to Charlie and she would fight a lot more often than not in school. She was a fighter in a club in Seattle before we met. She had found two things that made her mind blank at this point – Fighting and Sex." I say looking at my family.

"Then, the drugs came into play. The medicine pills they had given her made her feel so… floaty. She had stopped taking them but once she grew desperate to escape… she would take anything. She had then added another – Pills" I say and groan.

"Then came the drinking, mixing that with the pills made her stay under the haze for longer. She found that exciting, and at this point she hadn't felt excited in a long time. She was emotionless, numb." I say wiggling my thumbs together.

"So in her words, she found the perfect mix to feel emotion again: Fighting brought her adrenaline and pain. Drugs gave her that senseless bliss. Sex gave her purpose and pleasure. And Alcohol made her forget. She, at this point, was just happy to be able to feel something." I say sadly my eyes stinging for my poor miserable girl.

"That's horrible." Rose murmurs and Jasper just has a sad look in his face. Carlisle is still thinking hard and Edward just looks so sad. Esme… she looks shocked. "Alice, what did you mean when you said 'considering her past'?" Rosalie asks.

I frown, I knew she would pick that up. "Did you hear the last part of Bella's rant when she yelled at me?" I ask. She frowns deep in thought until suddenly her eyes go wide and her face goes blank. "No, Alice. Please, please tell me she was lying." Rose begs me her voice cracking.

I shake my head sadly. "What? What are you two not telling us?" Emmett asks. I pat his shoulder. "You should sit next to Rose." I murmur and he sadly does. I take a soft breath.

"When Bella was fifteen… she had a girlfriend named Veronica." I sneer the name with hatred and venom.

"And she had a best friend named Connor." I say and I see Edwards head snap up at the name. I silence him with a look and run a hand through my crazy hair trying to get my nerves settled, a habit I had picked up from Bella.

"They had come home from a party and Veronica and Bella where fighting. Bella being the protective person she was dropped Veronica off, not even bothered that they were fighting and told her that they would speak the next day. Bella went to hang out with Connor at one of their hang outs – an abandoned building a few houses down from hers – and they started joking around." I say and a steel undertone makes its way in my voice.

"Connor suddenly… he suddenly got really angry at Bella, because she rejected his offer to have sex with her and…. They fought, and I mean a full blown punch, blood, fight… he had pulled a knife out on Bella and after a long fight… he raped her." I choke out as sobs rock my body. I feel an arm circle around me and when I look up I see Mom just hugging me.

I let her hold me while I cry and after a long moment I can control my voice. "Charlie… he got there in time and didn't let him finish and almost killed the bastard but Bella was losing a lot of blood. He called the cops and whatnot and Bella was taken care of…" I trail off.

"So, now you all know. Bella is guarded and with good reason. She… she's strong and sure she has her demons. I mean, we all do. So next time you all think you are all high and mighty against her…. Don't rub it in her face that she isn't good enough." I snap at my dad as I stand up. "She already thinks that without having you tell her. She never thought that she was good enough for me. That's part of Bella… and if you had given her a chance, you would have known her better." I say as I walk out and grab my jacket.

I walk quickly out the door and down the long drive. I light up a cinnamon flavor cig, Bella's favorite brand and cherish the feeling. Cherish the smell… Bella's smell. Vanilla, Mint, Cinnamon and Strawberries.

I blow out a huge cloud of smoke. "I'm not giving up. I'll fight for you, Bella. I'll fight for you, until my heart stops beating." I whisper brokenly in to the dark and depth of the night. The wind pushing against me as I smoke. My Bella, we are meant to be together.

I smile softly. I just need to push her out of her shell again. I put out the finished cig and walk back to my house with a small smile on my lips.

**Bpov.**

I look at the small tube of blow in my hands. I should take it, I should. I need to, I want to. I'm sitting in a ratty hotel room, my duffle bag thrown at the base of my bed. I twist the cap from the tube and pour it on the silver dish and make two neat lines.

My mind…. ALICE, CHARLIE, RENEE, CONNOR, VERONICA, ALICE, ALICE, ALICE, KATE, HEIDI, IRINA, TANYA, TAPE, CHARLIE, RENEE, ALICE, RENEE, CHARLIE, TIME, HURT, CONFUSION –

I lean over the dish but I can't make myself sniff it. No, my last escape and its gone. SHIT. I lean forward again and force myself to sniff up one line. I light up a cig and lay down on the bed just thinking or rather living in the haze.

I'm not mad at Alice, I'm just mad that she never told me. She made such a big deal about Tina and me flirting but what - only I can fuck up? When she does it it's not a bad thing? What kind of fucked up hypocrisy is this? What? The Cullens can do no wrong? Ugh….

I throw my beer bottle against the wall in anger, I tangle my hand in my hair as I lay down on the bed. "Love, what a fucking joke. I don't believe in love… Who the fuck am I kidding?" I ask in anguish. I throw the cig in a cup of water.

"Time… I just need some time." I whisper as my eyes clenched as I try to relax on the bed. I hear the bathroom door open. "Are you alright? I heard a crash." Tina says walking over to me wearing nothing. I look up at her and back at the roof. "No, I'm not alright. But I don't think I ever will be so why bother?" I ask and she straddles my naked form. She looks to the side table and frowns a bit.

"You do cocaine?" she asks. I shrug. "Sometimes, I mostly prefer weed though, I just needed something stronger." I say my lips forming a slight pout. She rubs against me slowly. "Is it wrong that you being even more of a bad girl turns me on?" she asks. I give her a fake smirk. "Does it?" I ask. She frowns and runs a thumb over my eyes. "You look tired." She says. I shrug. "I'm used to it." I say.

She bites her lip. "It's this love thing, isn't it?" Tina asks. I look at the ceiling and sigh but don't answer. "This search for love you're doing, its gonna end up killing you badgirl." she whispers kussing my lios.

I kiss her back for a moment then break spart 'like it hasnt already?' i want ti say, instead i say "It doesn't matter." I sigh. And she moves closer to me. "I'll make you forget." She whispers. I close my eyes softly. "Try." I say - I feel like I'm really just begging her to. I just want to forget - and she pulls the sheet over us both.

And I feel a part of my heart scream at me what I already know_. I wish this was Alice!_

**A/N: it will get better next chap… I think…. Not sure, I hope it will. I'm actually tired of so much emo chaps.**


	62. Chapter 62

_**A/N: Hey guys! I literally have no idea what I am about to right it's exactly 11:16am in PR I'm listening to VH1 and the day is 2/2/13. So… let's see what I take out of my hat no?**_

_**I do not own twilight.**_

_**Ch.62**_

_**Apov.**_

I waited until I was sure my whole house was asleep. Until I was one hundred percent sure that my family was not going to wake up and then I sneaked out. I'm currently walking up Bella's driveway. I just want to talk to her, sure she may just ignore me but it is killing us. It's killing me.

I stop once I reach the clearing where her house is built and look at the huge house. Its pitch black. Maybe she's asleep? I walk up to her porch and press the doorbell. I wait… nothing. I press it again and again and again knowing that if I annoy her a lot she will come down just to tell me to stop.

When she doesn't come down, I worry. I bite my lip and look around. "Shit." I murmur and then I remember I still have the key. I unlock the door and turn on the lights. The foyer looks intact. A part of me is yelling at me not to walk anymore and to turn on my heels before I'm caught like some creepy stalker.

That's not the case; it's just that… knowing Bella's… habits, I worry. I walk to the living room and flick the lights on and gasp. Beer bottles. They are everywhere. Not only beer bottles but vodka bottles as well. There are a few broken bottles at the base of the wall under the fireplace.

I walk slowly around the tattered living room to walk to the fireplace. The picture of her and her dad is at the base of the fireplace, the glass cracked. "What the hell?" I ask quietly to myself as I crouch down to grab it. I stand straight the picture still in my hands as I take a few steps to the coffee table and I see a lot of cigarettes in the ash tray.

I also see a half smoked blunt next to it. I sigh and go to put the photo down when a peace of the broken glass slashes my finger. "Fuck." I growl lowly as I put pressure on it. I walk to the kitchen and quickly grab paper towels and put pressure on it. The paper starts to get red and I walk to the sink and roll my eyes. Of course more beer bottles. And shot glasses.

I open the tap and rinse my cut finger on the stream. Shit, it's a long cut that goes along not only one but three fingers. Starting at my pointing finger at the tip, to the middle of... let's call it flip off finger for lac of the adequate word, to the base of my ring finger. "Damn, all the rotten luck." I mutter at the sting on my finger.

I look around for a hand towel and fist my hand against it and sigh as I look around the kitchen. I walk to the fridge and grimace in horror at what I find. Beer, beer, beer, beer, peanuts, beer, beer, beer, grapes, strawberries and beer. What is wrong with this girl? There is NO food in this fridge.

I shut the door and walk out of the kitchen and walk up to the second floor and check all the rooms, even the study. And I gasped when I saw the mess in there. Books scattered on the floor, the chair laying on its side on the floor, papers scattered all around the room and even the safe was open.

Was Bella robbed? I walk in and walk to the door at the corner of the study and open the door to the bedroom there and it's intact. Nothing moved. The sheets don't look slept in and the air in the room is thick with dust. The air is stale, and you can tell no one sleeps in this room.

I close the door behind me and dash up to the third floor and opening Bella's room to find the bed empty. I frown. It's 2:30 A.M where the hell can she be? I squeeze the hand towel a bit more and walk around the disaster of Bella's room.

Clothes scattered all around, the sheets of the bed pushed to the floor. It looks horrible. It's so weird; Bella is really a neat freak. So to see her house in this state… it's scary. I take my phone out of my pocket and decide to give Bella a call. Just in case. It rings twice

"Hello?" Bella's groggy voice comes on from the other line. "Bella, it's me Alice." I say and I hear a shuffle on the other side and a door close. "Um, Al. Its two A.M, what's wrong?" she asks. I stop for a second. "Bella, where are you?" I ask.

"Some ratty hotel in Seattle, why what's wrong? Are you ok?" she asks. It still surprises me how Bella can be pissed at me one second and cool with me the next. "Um, yeah. I just came over to your house to talk to you normally and apologize but you didn't answer the door." I say not telling her that I was crazy enough to enter her house.

"Oh, um… apology accepted. I… I just needed some space from that stupid town." She sighs. I sit at the edge of her bed. "Bells?" I ask quietly. "What?" she asks. "Do you still love me?" I ask my voice showing how fragile I feel. There is a huge sigh on the other line. "Why do you want to know?" she asks.

"I need to know I'm not competing with anyone for you." I say and I hear a soft laugh. "There is no competition, beautiful. I still love you." She ways, her voice going to soft velvet. Warm and lovable. "Why do you keep fighting this Bella, you're not saving me from anything. You're not changing anything about how I feel." I say.

Silence on the other end of the phone. "Alice, I'm not worth the effort." She says. I smile to myself a bit more. "You're worth the effort because I am completely and irrevocably in love with you. And you can push me away all you want but nothing, nothing you do will push me away Bella. I'm a big girl and I know what I want. And that is you." I say my voice filled with some strength and incredible passion.

"Alice… I don't want you to turn into me. I don't want you to lose your family because of me. You will hate me if that happens… and I can't bear the thought of you hating me." Bella says and I groan.

"Remember that one time, when we ditched school and went to La Push?" I ask. "Yeah." She says. "Remember what we talked about. That if you wanted something, anything, then you needed to sacrifice for it. And I finally understand what you mean by that." I say.

"My house means nothing to me without you. My family, what they did to us. Now that is unforgivable. I don't think I will ever be able to call my house home again. Because you are my home, Bella. Home is supposed to make you feel safe and loved and warm. That's you, not them." I say.

I hear Bella sigh. "Where are you right now?" she asks. I look around her room. "Sitting on your porch." I lie. She chuckles "Liar, are you inside my house?" she asks. I shrug. "Maybe." I murmur and I hear her soft laugh, it's still not the normal laugh I am so used to.

It's the cold, slight bitter laugh that fearfully I have come to know, yet not love. "Look, go back to your house and sleep. I will be back in town in a few days, hopefully more relaxed and we can talk. Ok, now go home Al. I'll see you soon." Bella says and after I say bye she hangs up.

A few days. So, I did what she told me. I went home and went to sleep. The next few days I played it normal, summer vacation was right on the boarder we were just waiting for our final's test scores. One more week of school if we were lucky.

I was going to die laughing when Em and Rose had to explain to more than half of the senior class that they were in the sophomore class with me, Jazz and Ed. They only took senior courses to finish up earlier but they will still be in our school next year only they take less classes. Let's just say a lot of hearts where broken by Rose that day.

A few days later I woke up and went over to Bella's house and cleaned it, I told my family that I had gone out with Jessica to Port Angeles when really I was at Bell's house. Yet, I only tidied up the study. I didn't dare to dispatch anything from there.

After I was sure I had cleaned her house perfectly I walked back to see my family sitting in the living room waiting for me. "Alice, where have you been?" Mom asks. I take off my jacket and hang it. "I was out with Jessica." I lie smoothly; it had become incredibly easy to lie to my family now. It was almost as easy as breathing. "Really? So how come I saw Jessica at the coffee shop with Mike?" Rose asks.

I smirk. "There are more than one Jessica at school, Rose. I never said it was Stanley." I say giving her a superior grin. "Really? So what did you buy? I don't see any bags." she asks. I laugh and lean against the door frame and wag my eyebrows. "I never said I was going to Port Angeles to shop, Rosie." I say and just to fuck with her I lick my lips.

Rose stare is blank and Emmett booms out a laugh. "Alice you Dog!" he jokes and I shrug. "Bella isn't the only one that can have fun now is she?" I ask and after waiting a few seconds I stretch and yawn. "Well, I need a shower." I say and after giving Emmett and my shocked family a wink I walk up the stairs. My grin stays in place, _shit it's fun messing with people no wonder it's Bella's pastime. _I think to myself as I lock my room's door and enter my bathroom.

I let the warm water wash threw me and relax me. I pour soap into my loofa and start to scrub at my skin as I let my eyes close as I duck my head under the warm stream of water. If Bella was here...

I shudder a bit and it can't be the cold, the water is steaming. I let go of the loofa and let my hand rub along my skin. Let's just say… it was a really good shower. A really, really good shower. I get out and dress in short shorts and one of Bella's button-up shirts she had left. After I finish getting dressed I grab my iPod from the desk and put my headphones on.

A few days turned into one week without word of Bella. I tried calling but she had let her phone die. I checked the Seattle papers to see if there were word of an accident but there was no word of Bella.

**Bpov four days earlier**

"You have the right to remain silent, everything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law. You have a right to an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be assigned to you. Do you understand your rights as they have been dictated to you?" the cop asks as they pin me against their car.

"I know the Miranda Rights." I mutter and the cop opens the door and shoves me in the police cruiser. "I still don't get why your arresting me! I was just walking back to my hotel!" I growl at the cop. "You are being a public nuisance." He says and I roll my eyes and huff as I slouch against seats.

Of all the damn times to be arrested, I had to be arrested in fucking Seattle by a newbie cop. "How long have you been on the force, officer?" I ask rather lowly. "Four months." He states and pulls on to the streets. "How many arrests?" I ask. "This would be my sixth one." He says with an impish grin.

I chuckle. "Hey, is the Sheriff still Siena?" I ask smiling. "Why, yes. You know the sheriff?" he asks. I shrug. "I knew her." I mumble as I close my eyes and let my mind shut down, no need to focus on anything the man says.

**OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO**

I'm awoken with a huge bang and I jump up from the hard as floor cot and look to the door to see the sheriff leaning against the door. "Bell, what the hell are you doing here?" she says although her voice, is full of exasperation. Like she's tired of asking that same question to me over and over.

I put a small grin on my face as I look at her. "Well, Sheriff. Apparently I was being a public nuisance." I say and she rolls her eyes and walk over to me and sits next to my cot. "You were as high as a kite, almost dancing in the middle of the street." She says taking off her cap.

I lean against the wall and sigh. "Kill me for trying to be happy." I mumble and Sheriff huffs. "Bella, it's stupid that you still think drugs are the answer for all your sadness." She snaps at me. I frown. "Hey, if I'm not mistaken you were one of the people that taught me to handle my shit my own way. Drugs are my way." I growl.

She laughs. "Your such a petulant child." She says shaking her head. I glare at her. "I am not a child." I growl out. She tilts her head to me, her eyes flashing with some kind of passion and rage. "Then stop acting like one and face the world as it is, Bella. Act like an adult and you will be treated as so. Act like a child and I will treat you like a child." She says and I rest my head against the wall and close my eyes.

"Why do you bother? You've been on my case even before my dad died." I sigh. I hear her soft chuckle. "Sorry but I made a promise to your father to keep you safe, and I plan on keeping that promise. That is what life is about. You make a promise, you keep it. Your word is all that has worth in this world Bella, it's time you learn a bit of that." She says and stands slipping on her cap in a smooth movement.

She walks over to the door. "Oh, and I spoke to Jenks. And he agrees with me that you should stay here a few days and get your act together. He also promised that no legal action will transpire against me, so, as far as the outside world is concerned, Bella disappeared for a few days." She says and closes the metal door just as I launch forward and slam against the cold metal.

"Are you crazy!? You can keep me here without a cause!" I growl at her and she smirks. "Well, I can charge you with possession of cocaine and weed if that is what you want." She says and I glare at her. "I thought so, get comfortable inmate, you're staying here until your mood gets a lot better." She says and with that she turns on her hells and walks out.

I growl and lean my head against the railing. "Siena you are one crazy bitch." I mutter as I walk back to my cot and lay down. How long are they going to hold me here? Last time she did this she held me for around three weeks. Hope this time I can get out with a minimum of bullshit.

**Spov (Sheriff Siena)**

I sigh and shake my head, a half-frown half-wry smile on my face as I exit the holding area. That girl… It's time that she learned. I get that she's had to face some tough shit in her life but it's time that she grew up and learned to take it without turning to drugs to solve her every problem.

I meant what I said. I promised Charlie that I would take care of the kid and that was what I planned on doing, no matter how much she hated it. Because if she kept going like this, it was going to kill her.

I looked up when I heard a voice call my name. It was the officer that arrested Bella. I adopt a more stern expression but can't quite hide my small smirk. "Officer Williams," I nod at him and he grins.

"So, are we going to be charging the girl with anything?" he asks excitedly and I frown at him. Rookies. Always so damn excited about every small arrest.

"No," I say, giving him a stern look when he starts to open her mouth. I continue. "We're going to hold her here until I think that she's ready to live," I say firmly and he nods, a flicker of excitement in his eyes. I walk past him, heading towards my office.

I chuckle quietly to myself. "You better be ready, kid. 'Cause you're in for a rude awakening," I say, shaking my head. Still, I know that it's probably not gonna do any good in the long run. She's gonna do what she's gonna do, but I'm still gonna hold her until she gets a little attitude adjustment. "Time to face the real world, girl," I mutter, entering my office and shutting the door behind me.

**Apov**

I had taken to going to Bella's house every night to see if I could find her and in one of my boring days I had started toying around with my training motor bike. Bella would kill me if she found out but hey, technically it was mine and I was bored.

I remember Bella had taught me a few things and for the stuff I didn't know, I used Google and YouTube. I could take turns at a very low speed, drive straight without crashing and most importantly I had only needed stitches once.

Emmett somehow found out what I was doing and one day when I'm getting on my training bike Emmett walks out of the trees and stops me. I had to beg him for a bit until he agreed on teaching me some things.

Two weeks and no word of Bella. I didn't know what to do, I tried to find out if Bella was in a hospital or what not but it's like she just vanished. No sign of her anywhere. I had even called Jenks to ask him and he said he hadn't heard of her in a month but that it was a pretty normal thing for her to just vanish from time to time. So after him telling me not to worry, I tried to relax.

Until a Friday night where there is a party at Taylor's house. A cook out and of course it brings along alcohol which is the main reason anyone goes. Of course with Forks' wonderful weather –sarcasm noted- it was moved inside. Right when I walk in I let my eyes scan the room.

In the corner, leaning against the wall with a beer in her hand is Bella. She has her damn sunglasses on and her hair is cut is still short, if not a bit less even and shorter. Her skin looks pale, the smooth tan she normally has gone from it. I look at her carefully to see that she looks malnourished. Skinnier then I remember.

I walk over and grab two beers on my way and walk over to her. "You're alive?" I ask. Bella looks up at me lazily and a small smile plays on her lips. "So it seems." She says and I hand her a beer. She finishes the one she has and leans against the wall lazily and coughs. "You sick?" I ask.

She chuckles. "Nah, I'm good." She says and runs a hand threw her head "What brings you over here? I thought after two weeks of not talking to me you would want to kill me." she says and I shrug. "I want to, but the relief that you are ok and not dead in a ditch somewhere is incredible." I say and her face softens. "I'm sorry I worried you, it was a situation that was out of my control." She says with a small grin.

I raise an eyebrow. "You are such an enigma." I sigh and Bella laughs softly but it turns it to a fit of coughs. "You're sick." I state and she shakes her head and I roll my eyes and place a hand on her forehead, I gasp. "Bella, your burning up." I state and she moves her hand to circle against my wrist and pulls it down. "Since when do you need to check my temperature to know I'm hot?" she teases and I punch her arm softly. "Shut up." I mumble and Bella leans her head back on the wall.

"Bella, you're sick. Come on, let's get some fresh air." I say and after a minute Bella walks with me to the front porch. She sits down on a porch swing and I sit next to her as she leans her head back. I slip her glasses off and frown at the dark circles I see under her eyes.

"You look tired." I whisper to her as I hesitantly let my thumb run across the dark circles. Bella leans her head in my hand. "Mm, so warm." She mumbles and I smile a bit and lean over to her and snuggle against her. My head in her neck and I feel her arm snake around my waist pulling me tighter against her.

"I don't think I can keep this up." She mumbles, her voice frail. Weaker than I ever think I have heard Bella's voice. Weaker than the day she told me she loved me and that she was scared of doing so. Weaker than the day she told me Connor raped her. "Keep what up, Bella?" I ask just as softly.

"I can't keep trying to push you away. You're everything for me and it kills me to try. But I want you to be happy." She says and I feel like I could cry. "This is the happiest I have been in weeks Bells." I say and I feel her hug me closer. "Don't hate me." she whispers and I feel her head tilt as if to kiss me.

Then she freezes and quickly pushes me off of her and she jumps over to the border of the porch and pukes her guts out. I hold back my small grimace and walk over to her and pat her back and hold her hair back with one hand. "Shh, let it out. Let it out." I mumble and I hear her puke again and cough.

"Fuck." I hear her groan and I just rub her back slowly. "Shh." I coo. "Relax, come on. Let's get you some water and then I'm taking you home." I say and she slumps back in to me and we walk to the bathroom. She rinses her mouth with water and mouth wash and after damping her face with water she looks up at me and gives me a small smile. "Rain check?" she asks and I laugh and hug her.

"Sure thing, Bells. Sure thing." I mumble and kiss her cheek. "Now, let's get you home and get some rest." I say and after I speak to Emmett I grab the keys from Bella's pocket and drive in her Mercedes back to her house.

I breathe a sigh of relief once Bella is snug in her bed with a bucket next to it. I lay down on the couch at the foot of her bed, and for the first time in around a month I feel like I can breathe.

**A/N: just cuz they are kind back together doesn't mean the drama in this story is over jet! Sorry it took so long to update, have a nasty virus and stayed home from school witch gave me some free time that was not used on puking my guts out.**

**Remember there are still a lot of mysteries, who is Siena and will she just be a passing person. And a lot of others I just can't think of them at the moment. :P READ AND REVIEW!**


	63. Chapter 63

**A/N: Hey guys! Happy to see you don't hate me anymore lol xD**

**I do not own twilight. Blah blah blah**

**Ch.63**

**Apov.**

I wake up to the sound of coughing and groaning. I sit up slowly and rub my eyes awake. "Bella?" I ask. I hear a few more coughs "Go back to sleep *cough, cough* Alice." Bella croaks and I shake my head and stand up.

I turn on the lamp in the corner and after adjusting my eyes to the light I look at Bella to see her tangled in the sheets with only her head popped out. I smile softly at her and walk over to her and grab the thermometer. I put it in her mouth and push the button and wait until I hear the beep.

"You have a high fever Bell. You sure you don't want to go to the doctors?" I ask. She shakes her head "N-nah I-im g-g-g-good." She stutters between chattering teeth. I role my eyes at her "Must have caught something from the rank sluts you slept with." I tease and she laughs softly. "Yeah, maybe." She says and I roll my eyes and ignore the pain in my chest.

I'm not stupid, I assumed Bella would sleep with a lot of people after we broke up. The hurt it caused her would push her back to that fucked up state of mind. I run a hand through my hair and look at Bella. "How many girls?" I ask suddenly. She opens her eyes lazily to look at me. "What?" she asks. I look at her fully. "How many girls did you sleep with after we broke up?" I ask.

Bella closes her eyes. "Don't Alice, just don't." she says. "I need to know Bella." I say and she opens her eyes again. "Why?" she asks. "Because I need to know how far gone you've actually been until now." I state and I see her frown and lean back in the bed, her eyes regarding me lazily. "Ten." She says and I feel my heart squeeze but gratefulness rushes through me.

At least she told me. I should have told her… "Im sorry." I whisper. "You have nothing to be sorry for." She says and I shake my head and rub her leg. "I should have told you the exact day it happened." I whisper and I feel Bella shift on the bed. I close my eyes and wait for the moment when she will tell me to get lost. To leave her house but it never comes.

Instead I feel a warm hand come in contact with my chin and pull my head up; I open my eyes to see Bella's smoldering brown/black orbs. "Stop living in the past Alice, I don't blame you for it… I did, but… not anymore. Ok? It's Kate's fault. I'm here and you're here and that's all that matters to me, ok? I don't want you to carry the blame for some stupid set up." She says to me.

I close my eyes and Bella pulls me to her and hugs me for a long moment before pulling away. "I was an idiot to think that I could even try to persuade you." she mumbles and I laugh. "My stupid stubborn girl." I murmur and Bella pushes me playfully away from her and I fall against her bed.

She lies down on the bed and takes a deep breath. "What are we going to do with 'Mr. Saint?" she asks and I just assume its Carlisle. "I don't care anymore. I worked pretty hard in breaking my family ties to them while we were apart." I murmur and Bella sighs. "I told you not to do that Al." She says and I shrug "I got closer to Emmett if it makes you feel better." I say and she chuckles.

"Partly yeah, it does." She says and we stay quiet for a long moment. "I just… I feel like a prisoner in my own house. They gave me a curfew, chores, restrictions it's… infuriating. I can barely stand being in the same room as my family let alone the same house. It's like I'm being punished for being in love." I say and Bella bites her lip.

"They still hate my guts?" she asks and I laugh softly. "They just don't understand us." I confirm. She tilts her head to look down at me, "Then maybe you shouldn't tell them that were kinda back together." She says with a small smile. I chuckle and sigh. "Yeah… we need to talk about a lot more before we're back together but… all of that can wait until you're feeling better." I say and lean forward, purposely brushing against Bella's body and lean a hand on her forehead, "I don't like that fever." I murmur and pull away and I see Bella's eyes close.

I smirk as I stand from the bed _Lets call that payback for sleeping with other people. _I walk over to the bathroom and grab some cold medicine and pour it in to the plastic little cup. I grab a cup from the sink and pour a bit of water in it and walk back to Bella. "Drink this, if that fever doesn't go down im calling Dr. Green." I say and after a nod from Bella she drinks it.

She curls back in her bed and looks at me. "Where are you sleeping?" she asks. I motion for the couch at the end of her bed and she glares at me "Take a spare bedroom. More comfortable and I can take care of myself Al." she says and after a long five minutes of convincing Bella finally pushes me out of the room.

"Bella!" I groan and I hear her soft chuckle. "Go to any of the rooms on the next floor Al. I'll see you in the morning." She says her voice muffled by the door and after I grumble a response I march down the steps and go to the first room to my right. I stop and see that it's a dark green woodsy style to it. It's very… relaxing. I walk into it and touch the sheets that are soft and cool. I sigh and jump on the bed, snuggling in to the comfortable pillows. I snuggle my head in the cool sheets as my mind slowly drowns back in to the darkness of unconsciousness.

**Bpov**

I run a hand threw my hair as I look at the roof. I can't fight this anymore, not after what Siena had to say to me the past 11 days. Just thinking of it makes my mind drift back to it…

_~Day 2~_

"_Wake up inmate!" I hear a gruff male voice yell as he bangs against the metal rods of our cells. I groan and shuffle to sit up. "Stop making so much noise you no good cop." I yell and I hear two or three people/inmates laugh. "Just for that little lady I'll make sure the Sheriff takes hold of you." he says and I shrug._

_I brush my teeth quickly just in time to hear a through clear behind me "Come on, inmate I don't have all day." I hear Siena's cocky voice say to me. "Blow me, Sheriff." I say as I turn to walk over to her. She shakes her head "Oh, Bella. What am I going to do with you?" she asks._

"_Fuck me and let me go?" I ask with a grin. She rolls her eyes and opens the cell door. "How about..." she trails off as she grabs my arm and twists it behind my back and I land on the ground with a thump "I hand cuff you then we can talk about you earning your breakfast?" she asks sweetly._

_I growl "This is police brutality." I accuse and she laughs "Good thing is, no one knows you're here. Now ain't it?" she asks. I turn to glare at her and she chuckles "Come on Kid. Im not really sticking you with the crazy inmates all day, you and me are having a talk." She says._

_With that she pulls me off the ground and we walk to her office and she takes the handcuffs off. She sits behind her desk "What's a matter with you Bella?" she asks. I lean against the stiff chair across her desk "Nothing is wrong with me." I say._

"_Don't be like that, don't start closing off." She says and I sigh. "What Siena. What do you want me to say?" I ask. "I want you to say what you want to say. Not what you think I want you to say, but what you really, truly want to say." She says. I raise an eyebrow "And that means?" I ask and she leans against her seat._

"_That I don't want your bullshit, just your story." She explains with a shrug. I lean back in my chair "It's one in the same." I say and she leans forward "Look, Bella. I don't care if you think I'm the bad guy. I don't care if you think this is useless and that you're a bit too big to be in this situation. Ok? I just want to know why a lucky as hell girl like yourself is acting like a damn deadbeat!" Siena says._

_I clench my jaw and look at the floor "It's because I am." I say and I hear a loud sigh "You've got to be kidding me right? You're a dead beat? YOU, one of the richest kids in the world? Please, Bella. Sing a different tune, this one is getting tiresome." She says._

_I glare at Siena "It's not some sap story, what use is money if I have no one! No mother no father! No… siblings." I say quieter. Siena raises an eyebrow "No siblings? Why the change in tone, Bella?" she asks._

"_No reason." I say putting a mask up to hide my tone. Siena doesn't know me as well as Alice she shouldn't know im lying. "You know, Bell. It's hard to lie to a cop." She teases and I curse. "Nothing that concerns anyone other than me." I say and she shrugs. "You know all this negative action against yourself can be about some inner guilt." She says._

_I sigh "Don't shrink me." I say and Siena leans against her desk "Then what do you want me to do Bella? You're not acting like the level headed easy going smart girl you are. You're acting like a dumbass to be frank, so I'm treating you like a dumbass." She says. "Why do you even bother? It's not like I'm worth the effort." I say in exasperation standing up from my chair._

"_I have never asked anyone to care about me! never! I never wanted anyone to care about me so why is that people insist on trying! I never wanted anyone to try!" I yell at her. Siena's face is un emotional, detached if you would say so. And its calming and pissing me off all at the same time._

"_Just because you don't want someone to care doesn't mean they won't. We are human, caring is second nature. What? You're going to tell you haven't cared for anyone since Charlie?" she asks, teasing._

_I glare at her as I manage to get my ragged enraged breathing under control. But I don't answer her and she smirks "Thought so… Damn, I'm good." She says with a grin as she lifts her feet to the top of her desk. "I've tried really hard not to… and I'm good at it." I say and she smirks. I walk to the door and lean against it._

"_What so you don't need a heart?" she asks. I fist my hands at my side as I stare at a stupid wall. "The heart is a useless organ." I mutter and she laughs. "It's the most important organ and for a reason it's the symbol of love. You can't live without a heart, you can't live without love. Only an ignorant fool would go through life trying to avoid love, what a sad depressing life they would live." She says._

"_I don't believe in love, ok? I don't believe it's a holy emotion that will come to you and wash away your sins and what not. It's stupid and just a guaranteed way to get hurt! It's useless and stupid." I say and she smirks at me. "So, you've never been in love?" she asks._

"_I never said that." I say, it would be an insult to Alice to deny that I love her. I could never deny her, not even in my darkest time. "Who's the girl?" she asks. "Alice." I say and she nods. "So, you love this girl? Why?" she asks. I laugh softly. "She's just… amazing." I say and she nods twice. "So this girl.." she trails off throwing her cap on the desk._

"_Alec, wasn't it?" she asks and I sigh. "Alice." The name itself making me wince. "You think you got everybody fooled don't you?" She asks. Her voice sounding older than what she really is. "Despite all your efforts to never let another heart touch yours, that's assuming of course you have one, that girl has somehow gotten in under your wire." She says and I try to gulp down the sudden urge to cry._

_I clench my jaw tightly I say leaning against the wall. "And it kills you to admit, but we all know you need that girl. Bella, when you deny yourself the right to feel, you lose who you are. I never said anything before because it was either you be numb or die and I didn't want to see you die. But now, your strong enough to handle this like an adult. And you know what adults do when shit hits the fan?" she asks._

_I frown and she smiles at me and reaches under her desk and grabs a bucket and a brush and cloth. "They clean it up." She states and places it on her desk. I stare at her with a raised eyebrow and she grins at me and puts on her cap and walks over to me and puts the bucket in my hand with a grin._

"_It's time you grow up a bit, huh?" she asks and after patting my cheek twice she walks out of her office "Move it, inmate." I hear her yell after me and after a low menacing growl leaves my lips I fallow after her._

_Sometimes, I really hate my life._

I sigh, "Siena your one crazy bitch... but somehow... you're the only person I listen to when it comes to this shit." I mutter as I close my eyes and lean back, slowly, ever so slowly I fade into unconsciousness.

I wake up to the sound of rummaging in my room and when I open my eyes I see a cute little midget in front of me. I jump and somehow land on my back on he floor with my head thudding and I groan. "Bella, what the hell!" I hear Alice yell and I shake my head. Alice? what is she doing... oh... right.. smooth Bell. Real fucking smooth.

I slowly lift off the ground and jump back on the bed with a small groan and I hear Alice tsk. "No, no. You're sweating off your fever. Go take a shower. I already set the water the temperature its supposed to be." she says kinda pushing me out of the bed. I shuffle uncomfortably off the bed. "Then just let me take the sheets down to the laundry-" she cuts me off with a glare.

"Get in that shower Bella Swan Volturi." Alice says and I feel my knees go weak in the good way and I let go of the sheets in my hand and smile at her. "You know, there are easier ways of getting me naked." I joke and duck when she throws a plastic... what the fuck was that? Did... did she... "Did you just throw a pill bottle at me?!" I ask with wide eyes as I make my way over to the base of the wall where the big white pill bottle landed. "Yes, I did. And I have a whole bunch more right here." she says and grabs another one.

"Shit, what ever happened to being nice to the patient?" I ask her and she grins and tilts her head to the side. "You treat them good when they don't act like a jackass." she says and I pause for a moment. "Did... did you just call me a jackass?" I ask her. She nods. "Yup, now get in that shower. I'll fix up your bed and then I'll bring you some soup." she says.

I pout slightly. "Can I have chicken noodle?" I ask nicely. Alice smiles and walks over to me and kisses my cheek slowly and I don't know if its intentional but her hand just brushed against my stomach. I feel my abdomen clench and I hear her rise on her tiptoes and whisper to my ear. "Yes, you can have chicken noodle." she says and her lips brush under my ear across my pulse point just as her hands brush against my stomach and I hold back the small moan.

She goes to pull away and I wrap my arms around her waist pulling her closer to me, "I think I need a sponge bath." I say to Alice's ear and I hear her giggle as her free hand rungs up and down my back so... fucking good. I feel her walk with me a few steps until im against the counter and I feel her reach behind me but I let her as I feel her hands play with the hem of my shirt.

Then... she pulls away. I blink a few times and reach for her and she puts something in my hand. "Al, come on." I say as I look at my hand and wouldn't you know... a stupid sponge. I look back up to see Alice's retreating form exiting my room. "Smart little pixie." I murmur and catch the sponge before throwing it in the bathtub. I take off my shirt, sweatpants and... why am I wearing girl boxers?... hmm, they are comfy…

I jump in the shower and yell. Fuck! "ALICE! ITS FUCKING COLD!" I yell as I jump back out and fumble for a towel. I wrap it around me just as Alice walks back in with a startled look on her eyes before looking me over and roaring with laughter. "B-Bella... yo-your face is hahahahahah" she roars with another fit of laughter. And I huff. "I though you said it was good temperature?" I ask and she smiles and tries to stop laughing.

"Bella, you have a fever. You can't take a warm shower unless you want to faint. We need to bring that fever down. Now get your skinny ass back in the shower." she says and I frown "I do not have a skinny ass." I mumble before sulking back into he shower. I slowly, ever so freaking slowly get in and under the freezing water. Then when im finally getting used to the shower and im lathering up in soap when the toilet flushes and freezing cold water smashes down onto me.

"ALICE!" I yell again and I hear her soft giggle. "I couldn't help it." she squeaks out before I hear her feet retreating. "Fucking lucky I love you." I mumble to myself as I start to get used to the water and take a quick shower. I'll get my revenge pixie, I shall take my revenge!... shit... I really am out of it. After I'm out of the shower, I get dressed in girl boxers, sweat pants, wife beater and socks. I go back to the freshly made bed with new sheets and I smile softly.

I stare at it for a long moment... I don't think anyone since mom has made my bed while I was sick. I smile and just stare at the bed for a moment, trying to fight off the wave of emotion. "Get in Bella." I hear Alice's soft voice say form behind me. I turn to look at her and give her a soft smile as she places the plate of soup on the night stand and un tucks a corner of the bed and pats it, "In you go." she says and I walk over and hug her.

"Thank you." I say to her softly. She chuckles "For?" she asks. I snuggle my head in her neck, the ends of my short damp hair tickling against her skin. "No one has made a bed for me wile im sick since my mom died." I admit. I feel Alice freeze for a second before hugging me back and shushing me. "I just want to make you feel better." she says and I hug her so hard I'm afraid it might hurt her.

"You have, you've made me feel a lot better." I say and give her a kiss on the cheek before making my way slowly into the bed and Alice tucks me in. She sits on the corner and smiles at me. "Now, I'm all for pampering the sick, so... open up." she says taking the bowl and scooping up a spoon and blowing. I laugh softly and reach for the bowl but she slaps my hands away.

"I wasn't kidding, now put your hands back and let me feed you." she says and after I eye her warily, I let her. Shit, it feels good to be taken care of. It makes me feel… warm – and it's not because of the fever. It's all her, my Alice. Damn, I love this girl…

_**A/N: that was just a bit of an insight as to what happened while Bella was away remember she was locked up for 11 days. And two of them you have scene. Let's keep tuning in to these helpful life lessons from Siena, no?**_


	64. Chapter 64

**A/N: Here it is, new chap! Review!**

**I do not own twilight.**

**Ch.64**

**Bpov**

I wake up feeling better, a lot better. Must have been a 24 hour thing.. I stretch in the bed and look around for my phone but see it on the far end of the room. I frown, how the hell did it get all the way over there?

I look around the room quickly for Alice and throw the blanket off me and walk out to the desk when I hear the door behind me open. One word - "Bella." Alice's stern voice speaks from behind me. I wince. "I need to get my-" I'm cut off by Alice walking me back to the bed and throwing me there.

I land on the bed and my head swims in a rush, and then I feel the small plastic phone connect with my stomach. "Ow." I mumble as I try to shuffle back under the covers. "One thing. I tell you to do one thing and even that is too hard for you." Alice mutters. I frown. "Sorry, sheesh… I only wanted to check my email." I say quietly.

"Then you could have just called me," she says and I roll my eyes, "I won't call you just to grab my phone. I can't work like that. I don't like to depend on people." I say and Alice sighs and sits on the bed and rubs up and down my leg over the blanket.

"Well… then I guess it's time you start getting used on being waited on. It won't last forever and I know you're used to waiting on people and doing things yourself. But you can depend on me." Alice says and I smile softly and pull at her hand. Alice slowly lies down next to me and I hug her around the waist and lift my head over hers, burying my head in her short hair.

"I know I can, you silly girl. I'm just an ogre." I chuckle. "I don't like people taking care of me, why do you think I never got a maid?" I ask her. She chuckles and hugs me to her. "I just though you didn't want the temptation of a girl in an outfit." She says and I feel my eyes haze over.

_Alice in a French maid costume, skirt so short I can see all her milk white skin. A low cut at the blouse so I can almost see her entire breasts, the tight material showing every curve she has to offer. Her bending over to grab something… YUM._

I can repress the shudder, and gulp a bit loudly. "Um, would you mind if I bought one for you?" I ask. I hear Alice laugh softly and smack my arm. "Shut up." She murmurs. I pull her to me and duck my head and kiss her neck. Her warm, soft, delicious skin. I run my lips over her pulse point.

It's been 12 days. Do you know how hard 12 days without sex is? Even worse, it's been around a month and two weeks since I have had sex with Alice. God, I want her. I want to kiss every inch of her skin.

I place an open mouth kiss at her neck and wrap the blanket around Alice and me. I pull her flush against me and continue to attack her neck. I feel Alice's hand tangle in my hair, holding me in place as her neck cranes to give me more access. I hear a soft moan leave her lips and I push her against the mattress and hover over her. My lips start to trail lower, to the border of her shirt.

One of her hands trails down my back and stays at the base of my back before going under my shirt and tracing imaginary patterns there. I settle between her hips and pull her to my center and push across her to hear her moan softly. "I want you." I say against her neck.

"I want to feel your naked skin against mine, I want to hear you moan my name and I want your warmth to consume mine." I say against her ear as I feel Alice shudder from under me. "Bella..." she gasps when I push my hips against hers once more. The throbbing in between my legs getting more uncomfortable by the second. I trail my hands up her thighs slowly teasingly so…

Until I cup her from her pants. "God, I missed you." I moan softly as I feel the moistness from her short pants. I shift so that I can take of my shirt and I feel Alice stiffen under me. I frown and stop and pull she shirt that was about to go over my head back down. "What?" I ask.

"Um, Bella. I… I can't. Um, I thought I could but I can't." She says rushed before sliding away from under me. I quickly get away from her and to the other side of the bed. I knew it. I screwed up. I hurt her too much. She doesn't want me. I take a deep breath to try and steady my emotions. "It's ok." I say and run a hand through my crazy shaggy hair.

"Hey, Bella. It's not like that." Alice says and leans over to me and lifts my head up to look at her. "It's just that you're sick and I don't want to risk your recovery…" she trails off when I give her the look that tells her I wasn't born yesterday.

She sighs. "Ok, I'll tell you why." She says and sits back. "I… I want you to get tested." She says and my head snaps up to look at her. "Tested? For what?" I ask. She raises an eyebrow at me and I hold back my laugh. Ok, I failed. I roar with laughter. "It's not funny! I have only had sex with you. You have had sex with more than sixty people!" she says and I try to quiet down.

"Yeah, Ali. Buts it's not like my dick ever got anything." I say trying to hold down my laugh. "Shit, your right. My dick fell off lasts week." I say laughing my ass off. And Alice throws a pillow at me. "I'm not joking! I want to check if you have anything. You got really fucked up when we broke up and you slept with a looot of people so don't just tell me ten because we both know that's a lie." She says and I frown.

"Fine." I say with a shrug and lay down next to her face down. "Besides, I only slept with people I have normally slept with except for a three others." I say and snuggle with the pillow. I feel Alice's hand trail up and down my back, I know it's supposed to calm me but honestly. It's just making me horny.

"Alice, can you stop that please? You're just making me horny." I say and I feel hot breath fan across my neck. "Just because I won't sleep with you doesn't mean we can't do something else." She says.

I lift my head up and search her eyes and as soon as I find it I pull her flush against me. "You're such a naughty girl." I murmur through our kiss. And I feel her one hand come over to cup my breasts over my shirt and I can't help the soft moan. I pull her impossibly closer and flip so that I am on my back and she is straddling me.

The friction of us moving making my head fall back as a moan tries to escape my lips. I pull Alice's lips back to mine, tangling my hand in her hair while the other one goes to her thigh, maybe. Just maybe if I get her really riled up she will let us do it. I break the kiss on her sweet lips to move to her neck. I kiss all of her sweet spots there, under her ear, her pulse, where her shoulder and neck meet and a little behind that.

I move my hand under her shirt, touching her smooth creamy skin. God, I missed hers kin so much. I touch every piece of her skin on her back, trying desperately to make her want me just as bad as I want her. I move my hand forward as I reconnect our lips in a wild kiss.

You're kidding right? She's not wearing a bra. I moan in to our kiss as I cup her perfect breasts and brush my thumb over her peaks trying to get them to pebble which they do easily. I can't help but to smile a bit into the kiss when Alice moans and thrusts her hips against mine searching for friction. Hungry for it.

I break the kiss and trail kisses down Alice's neck and see that the shirt is rolled up to her chest. I duck my head down and bring one of her delicious peaks in to my mouth. The loud moan that escapes Alice is well worth the inner torture it causes me. God, I need attention down there and Alice isn't going to give it to me.

I switch in between both of her breasts until the hold Alice has on my hair is border line painful. Fuck, why is that such a turn on? Right, I'm a masochist. Forgot that small detail. I feel Alice's nails dig into the base of my neck sends a wave of arousal to land on me vibrating through my whole body making me shudder.

"God Alice." I moan out as I bite her neck teasingly. I would love to sink my teeth in to her but I don't want to hurt her. I settle for biting my lip I take Alice's shirt off and sadly leave mine on, so I can see her glorious skin over me. I look in her eyes that are dark and hungry and thrust my hips against hers teasingly and see how her eyes flutter closed and her lips part as if to moan.

I place my hand on her hip and push our hips against the other creating wonderful friction. I can feel how wet she is, it's brushing against my center over and over again. I let my hand trail down Alice's body until it's on top of her pajama short pants, I trail down until my fingers brush against the damp material of her short pants and I push it aside to feel her underwear, so wet, so warm… god.

I kiss Alice to silence her small protest and push the material of her underwear to the side. "It's all about you." I whisper against her lips before one of my fingers trace her wet, warm, slick slit. Alice shudders and moans and I shift again so that she is on her back and I am in between one of her thighs so that I can work easier.

"God you're so wet for me." I say and Alice lifts her hips to feel my fingers. "Please Bella." She whimpers and how can I not comply with that? To her voice, to her need. Even more, her need for _me. _I slowly slide one finger into her, moaning at how wet she really is and at how warm she is. She's a different kind of warm, where everyone else was just the same temperature as me, Alice is always so much warmer.

I place an open mouth kiss on her neck wile I focus. One finger, in, out, in, curl, out, in, curl, out. I insert a second finger and wait until she stretches a bit more comfortably and repeat, in, out, in, out, in curl, curl, out, in, curl, curl, out. And again, in, out, curl. I continue this crazy rhythm until she is trembling.

I add a third finger and thrust into her with my whole body, rocking us to the motion of my fingers once again. I had stopped when she started to kind of spasm from want. Now I continue the rhythm perfectly but I can tell she's getting desperate for release and it's not going to come (no pun intended) until I hit her G-spot.

I kiss her naked skin a few more times, cherishing her taste before I move a bit and thrust deep in to her, my knuckles brushing against her entrance as I hit her spot. And how do I know that? The loud moan/whimper that escaped her.

I hit it again and again and again focusing solely on that spot and I brush my thumb gently over her clit; she shakes. She is so close, I put more pressure over her clit and she is pushed over the edge. Clenching on my fingers over and over until she rides it out. Her orgasm so intense that she is exhausted, I let her close her eyes and after a few seconds I take my fingers out if her and lick them clean.

I moan against my fingers, I hadn't tasted arousal since me and Al broke up. Only her nectar would ever pass through my lips. I lean back down but my throbbing area seems to think I should be rewarded for my good work. But… Alice is asleep…

I take a deep breath and try to ignore the throbbing ache in my center. I close my eyes and try to will it away and when that doesn't work I get off the bed and in the shower. Cold, fucking cold and oddly enough it only makes me throb more. "Fuck." I groan when I can't seem to ignore it. I run a hand through my hair the chilling water running down my body oddly turns me on. I lean my head on the tiles and let my hand trail down lower. I rub my clit in circular motions, moving my hips ever so slightly with the rhythm I established.

I take a deep breath and suppress a moan and think about slipping in a few fingers but I just want to get off, I don't exactly want to make it looong. So I just frantically rub my clit until I felt the familiar coil. At this point I'm just fucking frustrated and annoyed. The pain of wanting release so good it hurts.. Fuck why do I have to be such a masoquist, it's just making it worse.

I can't… I can't go over the edge. I stop what I'm doing with a frustrated growl and shut the water off. I dry off quickly and slip on some sweats and walk quietly out of the room, Alice is still asleep. I grab my iPod from the living room and connect it to the surround sound, lowly so that Alice doesn't wake up with the loud music. Listening to Pink's Ave Mary A on repeat.

I walk to the kitchen and open the fridge to see it's just full of beer, I grab one and twist the cap off and drink down a few gulps. I push a six pack to the side and see that I have a few pieces of fruit in the fridge. I grab the fruit witch are just strawberries, blue berry's and green grapes and place them on the counter. I check the cup boards and drink a few more gulps of my beer and look at the clock its 2pm it is a good time to have a beer.

I find pancake mix and pull it out. I grab the waffle maker and place it on the counter and start mixing stuff in a bow. After I have batter for blue berry waffles, strawberry waffles and chocolate chip waffles I top it with tight wrap and just cook myself three chocolate chip waffles.

"Yum." I murmur and place the plate on the counter and grab another beer from the fridge and twist the cap off. I grab the syrup and eat in silence, bobbing my head to the song. After I eat everything and finish my beer I put everything away, clean the dish and throw the empty bottle in the recycling bin.

I switch off the iPod and go to the living room to see it all clean. Did… did Alice clean my house? I sigh and walk back to the kitchen and make a few more waffles, some juice found around and a fruit platter and put it all on a trey and take it to my room for Alice.

I open the door and walk over to the bed and sit down on the corner and put the trey in my lap. "Alice, wake up." I say softly as I shake her leg softly. Her eyes flutter open and a small smile starts at her lips as she stretches. "Hey, Bella." She says and yawns. Damn, she's so cute.

"I made you some lunch breakfast." I say with a small smile and Alice chuckles and sits up as I place the trey on her lap. "You didn't have to make me anything. If anything I had to make you something, you're the one that's sick." She says and I roll my eyes and place the trey on her lap. "Eat." I say and lay down next to her.

"So, how are you feeling?" Alice asks. I smile a bit and run a hand through my hair. "Peachy." I say sarcasticaly. I sigh as I feel my breathing even out. "What's a matter?" I hear Alice asks. I shake my head. "Nothing. I just have a bad nagging feeling." I say tho that may be because I couldnt grt off... I hear Alice sigh. "Just try and relax." She says and I roll over so that my head is half on the pillow and my nose is pressed up against her naked side. "I'll try." I say and kiss the side of her stomach. Just to fuck with her I place a few open mouth kisses on her side before snuggling in to the pillow and just let her eat.

"What am I going to do with you pretty girl?" I hear Alice ask as she runs a hand through my hair. I hum at the back of my throat. "Love me and fuck me?" I tease and she whacks the back of my head. "Go to sleep." She says and gets out of bed. I chuckle and let my head snuggle in to Alice's pillow.

I hear the door shut and her footsteps fade in to nothing and sigh. "Do you still love me?" I whisper to the room, asking the question I'm too afraid to ask. The one I may have lost the right to own in this month and a half. I sigh and shake my head. "Don't be stupid, she loves you." I mumble and snuggle my head in the pillow.

My mind flashes back to the 11 days I spend with Siena.

_~Day 2~_

_I scrub and scrub and scrub. This stuff is not coming out. Ha! Coming out hahahah. "What are you giggling at inmate." Siena snaps. I rest on my knees and straighten out my back with a crack. "That these stains, like yourself. They won't go away." I say with a grin and the sheriff rolls her eyes at me and walks over to me._

"_Circles, darling. You're scrubbing in lines. Come on, you still have half a cell to clean. And just because you scrub hard doesn't mean it's going to come off, if you thought a bit more before you act you can save yourself a lot of energy and time. Now hurry up, this place won't clean itself." She says clapping her hands together. I hold back a growl and start to scrub again, "This shit doesn't come out!" I say in exasperation as I throw the brush in a bucket._

"_What's so hard about fallowing instructions?" she asks. I sigh "It's not going to come out." I say and she sighs "Try it, just try to scrub in circles." She says and I role my eyes and take the brush out of the bucket and start to scrub in circles._

_Over and over and when I use the cloth to rub at the floor the stain is gone. "Wow, magic." Comes the sheriff's sarcastic remark. I sigh and star to brush in circles at all the marks and they vanish and by the time I finish I am sweaty and hungry._

_I throw the brush in the bucket and wipe at the sweat. "Yeah, sure. Now, can I have some food?" I ask. Sheriff smiles and nods to her office and I walk over with her and we sit down and she pulls out a bag of burgers._

_I dig in ravenous and the sheriff laughs "Now, you've never been good at fallowing instruction now have you girl?" she asks. I swallow down the bite of food, "I normally make the orders so no, I'm not keen on fallowing instructions." I say and Siena laughs. "You're such an odd girl." She says shaking her head._

_I take a drink of soda "Well, most people like me." I say with a shrug and she nods "Yeah, in here. No one likes you." she says and I shrug "Hey, Rome wasn't built in a day." Is ay and she nods._

"_Bell, I'm about to head home but I want you to think about something. Ok?" she asks. I nod and finish my burger and am now working on the fry's. "There are some things you earn others you deserve. So in your life you earn some rights and deserve others. Witch ones do you deserve?" she asks as she stands from the counter and stands up and walks me to the holding area._

"_Think about that won't you?" she asks and slams the metal bars and walks away while I'm lost in thought._

_~day 3~_

_I woke up, worked out, ate, took a shower and sat there and just thought about it._

_~day 4~_

_I slept in, nothing to do. So I stayed there deep in thought, ate and slept._

_~day 5~_

_The sheriff asked me if I had thought about it and when I told her I still didn't have an answer she told me to meet her outside. When I went out it was raining, she made me run a fitness track. After I finished it went over to me and asked me. Did you earn that or deserve that._

_When I told her that I deserved it she made me run it again. She asked me once again if I earned it or deserved it. This time I told her I earned it. She looked in my eyes and told me "Why did you earn it?" she asks._

_I look back at her and sigh "Because I thought I deserved something that wasn't mean to be deserved." I say and she nods. "Good, so you aren't just a pretty face. Now go take a shower and I'll see you tomorrow." She had said and I had done what she asked._

_~day 6~_

_I wake up early, work out, take a shower, eat and go to the sheriff's office. I sit there and speak with her calmly and she wonders why I am so calm. I tell her it's because I have a routine. She nods and afterwards when I go to sleep she wakes me up and tells me to run a lap with her._

_No is not an answer, I go with her and we work out until its dawn. I ask her why we did this and she smiles "You can't get mad when your routine changes." She says with a shrug._

_~day 7~_

_I work out excessively that day, I woke up in a bad mood. The sheriff calls me to her office and all I do is snap at her. "I'm nothing and I'm no one! Why do you care!" I yell at her. She nods "Your right. You're no one." She says with a shrug. She sends me to solitary confinement for one whole day. The silence was driving me crazy. How can someone be in their minds so much, the silence was un nerving. I thought I had lost my mind._

_When she comes to get me out I try and punch her but she just knocks me on the ground and laughs "Just because something is wrong with you, doesn't mean you have to make something wrong for everyone else. How did it felt to be no one? Because we are just getting started." Is all she says before she drags me to my sell._

_~day 8~_

_she didn't show up. She never showed up and I found that relaxing and un nerving. Had she finally had enough of my bullshit or was she in danger?_

_~day 9~_

_still no word of her and the officers would walk past my sell and give me no mind. Except for one that would bring me food. But other than that, nothing. No words to me that day._

_~day 10~_

_I am woken up by the sheriff, I sigh in relief but she noticed. "Worried about me?" she teases. I glare at her and she smirks and shrugs "Hey, I just thought I had finally wormed up to you." she says and I crack a small smile._

_That night was spent of her asking me about Alice and me telling her everything about it._

_~day 11~_

_I'm walking through the green area and am tackled to the ground and pinned and handcuffed. When I finally zone back in the Sheriff is laughing her ass off. "Sorry for that Officer Williams though you were going to escape." She says and I glare at him. He gives me a grin and I huff._

"_What? Missing Alice?" she teases. I glare at her, "Nope." I say with a grin. She laughs "Didn't sound like that last night." She says and my grin slides off. "Hey, you miss her right?" the sheriff asks._

_I nod once and she walks over to me and we look at the woodland area across the street. "When you want something Bella, you have to learn to go for it." she says. I frown "It's the wrong thing to do." I say and she shrugs "Hey, sometimes its ok to be selfish. Sometimes, being selfish is the right thing to do. But the answer always depends on who you are asking." She says with a shrug._

_I nod "And… what if you're afraid of going after it?" I ask not meeting her gaze. "then you will regret it your whole life. But, eh, who needs more regrets right?" she asks. I laugh softly and shake my head at her._

"_You are one crazy sheriff." I say and she laughs "People need more people like me." she says with a wink. I laugh and push her with my shoulder "Sure, more crazy people that lock teenagers in jail against their will." I tease._

_She laughs "This shit is like camp for you." she says and I laugh "Yeah, you're probably right." I say and she sighs. "What would you do, if you could be selfish?" I ask her. "If I could be selfish? Hmmm… I would probably go home and spend some time with my friends." She says and I nod._

"_That doesn't sound so bad." I say and she grins "Yeah, but if I were selfish. You wouldn't be getting this lecture. In life." She says with a grin. I laugh "yeah, I guess." I say and she turns to look at me "What would you do if you could be selfish?" she asks._

_I sigh "If I could be selfish? I… I'd go back to Forks. I'd look for Alice and tell her to give me one more chance. Tell her that I love her, more than my own life and that I honestly can't live without her." I say and laugh as I kick the gravel._

_"Bad thing is… I don't want to be selfish." I murmur and the Sheriff sighs and puts a hand on my shoulder "And why is that?" she asks. I frown "Because, her family despises me. It's broken her apart from them… and I would hate for her to see her family break apart just because of me." I say with a wistful smile._

_"Sounds hard…but, it sounds like it's their fault. Not yours. You never did anything to them." She says. I sigh and look at the gravel "Yeah… I guess." I say and she chuckles and I feel her go behind me and work something with the handcuffs and they are off._

_"I want you to go and be selfish ok? For me, I want you to be selfish and I want you to find Alice and tell her how you feel. Love, Bella… there's one thing you have to know about love. And I don't mean sappy love I mean true love. It only comes once, and I'll be damned if they make you feel bad for loving that girl ok? Don't miss your shot at true love, don't be your dad. Your nothing like him and that is a good thing." She says and when I turn I see her eyes hard._

_"I- I can't." I say and she chuckles and pats my cheek "Yeah, you can. And you're going to. You are going to be selfish, for me. I want you to be selfish. Now go, your car and stuff are right on the corner." She says and I walk back a few steps and turn._

_I walk a few steps and she calls to me "YO! INMATE!" she yells. I stop and turn to look at her "Yeah?" I ask. "Get your act together before I don't give you a second chance." She says and the look on her face tells me so._

_This was my last chance to get my life together. And I'm going to do it right. I nod at her "I will." I say and she nods at me "Now get lost." She says and turns her back to me but I run to her and hug her and give her a noogy for good measure._

_"See you later you crazy bitch." I say and kiss her cheek before dashing down eh street. I can hear her laughing behind me. I'm going to forks._

_**A/N: There you go, all that Bella went through all those days. She learned quite a bit.**_


	65. Chapter 65

**A/N: Lol, hey guys. Liked the last chap? Hope ya did. Now here is the next chapter. And here will be a few more time with Alice and Bella talking about some issues and what not but there will be some cuteness.**

**I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT.**

**Ch.65**

**Bpov**

One thing I hate more than waiting for sex? Getting tested for STD's. Oh, I've been tested for them a lot. Hell, I used to get one ever two weeks until I met Alice. I used to keep a close ear to gossip about girls with STD's and stay far away from them. I never shared my blunt with anyone except close friends and I always made sure that the person I was sleeping with was clean.

Why do you think I repeated so much with the same girls? This is crazy shit. I wait until the nurse is back with the needles, swabs and what not and let her have her way with me (not in**that** way). Too bad to, she had the short outfit and everything, and worse yet I was horny-er than a bitch in heat.

After I finish everything they say they will call me so that I can pick up the test results in a few days. I grab my jacket and bolt out of there and head on home where Alice is waiting for me. "So? What did they say?" she asks.

I decide to scare the crap out of her. "I have HIV." I say seriously and Alice pales until I crack a smile. "That was for making me go there, I'm still waiting for my test results but they were thrilled to hear that I have gotten mono at least three times in my lifetime." I say and Alice punches me repeatedly.

"You jerk! I thought you were going to die! You are such a bitch sometimes Bella!" Alice yells at me. I roll my eyes at her and walk to the kitchen. "Would you calm down! My god, it was a small joke. Like I would be here if I actually had that." I say and grab a beer from the fridge.

"Bella, I think you're becoming an alcoholic." Alice comments as I bring the beer away from my lips. I laugh softly. "No, my father was an alcoholic. I just really like the taste of beer, especially my beer. Dad had no control and couldn't stop after one, I can." I say and grab ingredients for a sandwich from the fridge.

Alice and I had gone shopping yesterday and she had forced me to buy so much food. I didn't know how the hell I was supposed to eat all of it before it went bad. "You sure about that?" Alice asks and I roll my eyes and walk over to the sink. I pour my beer down the sink and throw the bottle in the recycling bin.

I turn to look at her. "Happy?" I ask not wanting for her to keep talking about alcoholism. It brings back way too many bad memories for me to even try to fight off. "Ecstatic." Alice says with a nod and I sigh and walk over to make myself a sandwich losing my appetite. I lift the bred from the other peace and throw one some ingredients and throw the other piece of bread on it and rest my head on the counter my brain trying to spill back in to a memory.

I fight it off witch results in me having a headache. I sigh and jump a bit when I feel Alice's hand on my back. "Shit, Alice. You scared me." I mumble and she hugs me and I hug her back breathing in deep her cent filling my senses. I feel the muscles on my back relax slowly and I pull her tighter against me burying my head in her neck.

"Shh, what's a matter baby?" Alice asks softly. I take a deep breath. "Nothing, it's just that my mind likes to flash back to some not so good memories." I try to explain. I'm sure I sound like a mad woman. Alice rubs my back. "Its ok, I'm here. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere." She says and I slowly unwind.

Alice kisses my cheek and lips a few times before pulling away. "Why don't you go to the living room and watch some TV and I'll bring you a new sandwich, you kinda killed yours." She says and I chuckle and after a small protest she pushes me out of the kitchen.

I sit there and watch Barter Kings, I love this show. I don't know why, I just love anything that has to do with trading. I get lost in the show it's the episode where they trade the paintball gun for an albino python. And I love that one of the Steve is afraid of the python.

I hear Alice enter the room and place a cup filled with coke and a plate with a sandwich on the coffee table. She walks out of the room and comes back with the same for her and a bag of chips. I laugh softly and she sits next to me and I kiss her cheek. "God, you are a perfect woman." I say and snuggle my head in her neck before she chuckles and kisses my lips twice and we dig in.

I swallow a mouthful of food and drink it down with soda. "I want an albino python." I state. Alice chokes on her soda and starts coughing and I frown. She wipes her mouth. "You want what?" she asks. I shrug. "I want an albino python. They look cute and hot." I say.

"You're joking right?" she asks. I shake my head. "I mean, I think it's time I had a pet. You know, have some responsibilities other than myself. Just to check if I can be responsible. And snakes are easy, you give them a bunny and they won't eat for a month! How can you kill something that eats at such odd periods of time?" I ask with a smile.

Alice looks at me for a long moment before nodding slowly. "Alright… where are you going to put it?" she asks. I look around the living room. "Right there!" I say and motion to the gap in the wall that kinda connects the pre room to the living room. "It was built for a fish tank but Dad hated fish so we just put stuff there." I say with a shrug.

"I can't believe you actually want a freaky snake." She says and I frown. "They will die in the wild! They have no camouflage! Didn't you hear the zoo keeper in the show?" I ask her. She frowns and I raise an eyebrow and grin. "You're not afraid of a snake are you?" I ask scooching forward.

"Nope, I'm not. I just don't like the idea of a huge snake around you." she says. I smile. "Come on! It be fun, one little snake. It can be our pet." I say and Alice grimaces. "Can't we just get a puppy?" she asks. I pale. "These couches are worth more than a car." I state.

She shrugs. "I said dog, not cat." She says and I grin. "But I love pussy's." I joke. My eyes go wide. "IF I get a cat, can we call it pussy?" I ask and Alice laughs and I join her. We laugh like little kids. "You are such a kid." Alice says in between laughs. I chuckle in to her neck. "I change my mind. Who needs more than one pussy?" I ask and send Alice a look.

She shifts and pulls away from me and I groan. "I was joking for God's sake. I know your rule." I say and pull away from her. I sit back and sigh, I flip through the channels until I settle on some 16and pregnant re run.

I feel Alice hesitantly move closer to me and I hold my hand out to her in a sign that I'm not angry at her. She takes my hand and leans into me and we both lay on the couch. I rest my head on Alice's bicep while my arm is circled around her waist and the other is holding my head up.

We stay like that for a long moment but after around ten minutes I turn to look at her instead of the show. I stare at her spiky crazy hair, her soft ivory skin, her hazel eyes, her push up nose that looks so cute, her pouty pink lips, her thin facial structure. God, this girl is a re incarnation of a Greek Goddess.

"What are you staring at?" she asks as her eyes flash to me and her lips curve in a delectable shy smile, a faint blush covering her perfect cheeks. "I'm just admiring your beauty." I say normally.

Her blush grows and so does her smile. "Why thank you." she murmurs shyly and I lean forward and kiss her cheek. "Do you even realize how much I missed you?" I ask her quietly. She shifts so that she's on her back and looks up at me, her hand coming to cup my neck her thumb grazing the outline of my jaw.

I hum softly at the warm of her, is it weird that the simplest of touches form Alice no matter how innocent incredibly turn me on? Maybe I'm just so much like a guy like that but shit, if she keeps touching me this softly and intimately I don't know if I will control myself enough to stop.

"How much did you miss me?" she asks softly. I lean my head into her hand, my eyes falling in the peace of the moment. "I felt like… like my heart had been physically pulled out of my chest and that my lungs and any other organ I needed to breathe had fallen to the same fate… I couldn't… I… I couldn't cope with it… I'm ashamed to admit it… but nothing I did… nothing at all could make me forget the pain of losing you Alice…" I say finding it hard to make the words come out.

My voice sound gravelly and scratchy, like I can't raise my voice at all and I feel the moisture in my lashes as I fight the wave of emotion, I lick my lips. "I felt like…I was a skeleton, dead, numb… cold. It sounds pathetic and like a lame excuse for what I have done but every girl I slept with during our time apart… I imagined you. I almost never let them return the favor… And if I did, I faked the orgasm." I mumble as I feel Alice's hand drop from my face.

"I can admit I feel ashamed of what I have done Alice… but at that moment… I did what I had to do to survive, it was pushing it to live a day without you. Every night I imagined a new scenario of what would happen if I came back to you… I just didn't have the guts." I admit.

"But… you know what the worst part is? Yes, I used those people and that alone is horrible. But I couldn't stand to stay the night; I couldn't bear to let them see me leave. To see the look in their eyes when they realize… when they realized I can't be what they wanted… that I couldn't be it for them. It was almost the same look you gave me when we broke up and I couldn't bear it." I admit clenching my eyes shut.

I feel like I'm confessing my sins, which in a way I am. "The same way I couldn't bear to look in your eyes when you realized I couldn't be what you wanted. But I'm trying, I'm giving it everything I can to be it. I want to be that person, I want to be that person you can take home to your parents and they will smile and think 'When we die, she will be ok' and… I want to be that person that you can be proud off. The person that you can trust completely to be there when you need them, I'm trying. And I will keep trying until I die. That's a promise Alice; I'm not giving up on this. With us, it's too real to take for granted." I say and open my eyes to look at her.

Her eyes are shining with some mix of emotion I can't locate. And I feel her shift to sit up and I follow suit. "Bella… you used all those girls…" she says softly and I feel a wave of shame overtake me. "I did." I admit looking at her eyes. "I… what kind of a person can do that, Bella?" she asks.

I gulp and try to think of a good response to it. "A psychotic one." I admit. It's the only response I can think of saying. "Why?" Alice surprises my by asking. I lift an eyebrow. "Why what?" I ask her. She bites her lip "Why did you do that?" she asks. I sigh. "I… I don't think you'll like the answer to that." I say looking into her eyes.

Her gaze is stone hard. "Try me." she says. I smile a bit. "Trust me, you don't want to know." I say. "Trust me and let me know." She counters. "Alice, I really don't want to have a fight we are just trying to get back together and already you want to fight?" I ask softly.

"Bella, it's something I need to know." She says. "It was the only way I could ignore the fact that my life was utterly and completely worthless, ok? I thought that if I gave someone at least some amount of pleasure I had earned the right to live another day." I say in truth.

Alice stares at me for a moment before standing from the couch and running a hand through her hair. "You promised me Bella." She says looking at me. I raise an eyebrow and stand from the couch. "Which promise is the one we are speaking of exactly?" I ask tentatively.

She pushes my arms away from her when I reach forward and I take a step back, like a wounded animal. "You promised me that you were over trying to end your life." She says. I bite my lip and try to give her an easy going smile. "I promised you my life was worth living if I had you, I didn't have you Alice. I had no reason to live after that, the only think that actually kept me from killing myself was the thought that you would blame yourself." I state and Alice pushes me.

Either she got stronger or I am weaker because I flew to the couch with her push. "And you thought I would think it was a coincidence if you ended up dead!" she yells. I scratch my neck. "I… I" I try to find a word. "For one moment didn't you stop to think of my will to live?! Don't you think I wouldn't have followed suit after you! I have no reason to live if you're not in my life!" she yells.

I stay frozen and an uncontrollable fury comes at the thought of Alice killing herself. "Don't, Alice. Don't you dare. You are not me, your life is worth something. ME? I could die right now and I bet you are the only one who would care." I say and she slaps me so hard I actually feel dizzy.

The whole left side of my face stings and burns. "You promised me you wouldn't harm yourself. I swear to God right now, if you kill yourself I will do the same." She says and the tone of her voice stops me cold. My rage fading into nothing at the seams. "Promise me." I say.

Alice frowns and kinda glares at me. "Promise you what?" she asks. I take a step toward her and hold her arms softly as I pull her to me. "Promise me you won't hurt yourself if anything ever happens to me, Alice. I need you to promise me that." I say, "I can't imagine a world in which you don't breathe, smile, live, laugh… it sounds like the day hell will cross over." I say softly.

Alice's anger seems to vanish as a fragile look comes over her features. "Only if you promise the same." She says and I shake my head. "I couldn't live Alice. I've lost too much in this life. You can't punish me to a world where I've lost the only reason I have to live." I say feeling my eyes burn with tears just at the thought.

Alice bites her lip, her eyes teary. "Then what are we going to do?" she asks softly. "If I die… Be it by natural causes or by my own stupid hand… you need to live for me, ok? You need to find a reason to smile, and laugh… you need to live for the both of us, if something were to happen to me." I say to her.

Her shoulders shake and I pull her to me. "And what if something happens to me?" she asks and I shake my head. "I will protect you Alice, with my life. Nothing will ever happen to you, not if I can help it. And if I can't, then… we will die together… But… if we make it Alice. If we make it to be old and grey." I say with a hint of a smile at the image of my Alice as an old lady.

"Then… we have to do like your favorite movie ok? Like the notebook." I say as I feel tears fall from my eyes. "We die together, because we can't live without the other. That much is a proven fact by now. Ok? Is that a good deal?" I ask clearing my though. Alice looks like she's about to fall apart but she shakes her head.

"I can't let you die, if I die." She says. I shake my head. "Please Alice, don't." I say and I can't help let my shoulders shake with the sob that wants to break through me. "Don't make me live in this world without you, I've already lost too much." I say and we sit together on the couch.

She is on my lap and I am holding her hands in between mine. "Please, Alice. I'm begging you. Please." I say, the tears falling. Alice is full blown crying but we need this promise. We need to promise each other this. "Bella, you need to try and live." She tries to say but I shake my head.

"I won't be able to, Alice. I won't, please. You're the only reason I'm alive right now. You and only you. Please, don't make me. I will do anything Alice, I swear anything but don't make me live a day without you." I say and finally, finally I feel her nod against me. "For now… for now I won't make you. But if I ever find another reason to… you will promise me." she say sand I just hug her.

I hug her to me. I hug her so hard it may hurt her but I don't care. I just cherish her warmth. That she's here with me, after our emotional roller-coaster we lay down on the couch, just cuddling.

I'm just happy that we are together and got that conversation out of the way. We stay close together until night comes and we walk up the stairs together and lay down on the bed together where we resume our position of spooning. Alice's body tucked perfectly against mine.

We fit so perfect together, like a piece of yarn. You cut one, you cut both. That was me and Alice's life now. We were to close knit. I sigh and tuck my head on her shoulder. "Alice." I say softly. She hums and I smile "Can you imagine us old and grey?" I ask and I feel her shoulders shake.

"Oh my god. Why did you give me that mental image?" she asks and I shrug and we both laugh. "I can just imagine the old perv you will be." She murmurs and I laugh. "You're just as bad as me Alice. Only that you will be one of those crazy old ladies who have a huge button collection." I say and we burst out laughing.

Just like that the tense and depressed mood is lightened in to perfect and relaxed. I kiss her cheek. "She loves me, she loves me not. She loves me, she loves me not." I sing as tatu and Alice laughs and places her hand over my mouth were I lick her palm. "Ew, did you just lick me?" she asks.

I wag my eyebrows and lick her cheek and she crinkles her beautiful nose and giggles. "Ew, Bell." She says and I shrug. "What? You only like it when I lick you down stairs?" I tease. She grins. "Oh, I love it. But that's not the point." She says. I shake my head and burry my head in the pillows.

"NO! No, no, no. I am not interested in your conversations you will just rile me up and leave me alone. NO, I am not listening to your teasing." I say loudly. She laughs and smacks my butt and shit, why am I a masochist? It's such a freaking turn on! "Al…" I trail off and she chuckles. "Can I have a goodnight kiss?" she asks adorably.

I turn her around so that we are facing each other and I tangle a hand in her hair and kiss her softly. My plan backfires tho when Alice does the same to me, pulling me in to a full make out session that leaves me panting and aching for more.

It doesn't help when Alice bites my lip and 'accidentally' pushes against my hips making me moan in to the kiss. She pulls away from me with a smile and turns ignoring my protest to keep kissing.

"Good night, Bella," she says sweetly, deliberately pushing her hips more into mine. I stifle a moan. "Good night, beautiful," I sigh sadly.

Shit, this girl is such a tease. This is torture!

**A/N: here it is, I actually cried writing this chap and I love the hole Alice teasing Bella.**


	66. Chapter 66

**A/N: Hey guys, hopefully this chapter will be long and funny. Just Alice and Bella enjoying their time re-connecting. Hopefully... shout out to the best beta ever A Thousand Undiscovered Stars. ^_-**

**I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT.**

**Ch.66**

**Bpov**

A few days have passed without word of the clinic. I was starting to get worried but then again, I'm sure Tina, Katelyn and Wanda (the three girls I slept with out of routine) were clean. But, then again you can never be too sure and if it comes back fucked, let's just say. I am expecting the worst.

I wake up to Alice's soft mumbles; I rub my face a few times before snuggling back to Alice's back. I start placing open mouth kisses on her neck and shoulder trying to wake her up. I hear her deep inhale and I know she's awake.

"Morning." I mumble placing quick kisses on her neck until I reach her lips and kiss her softly. I feel her try to pull away but I role my eyes and keep her close to me and pull away slowly but still hug her "Morning." Alice says and I smile softly at her. She leans forward and we kiss slowly, our lips moving in perfect sync.

Slowly I feel Alice's hand wrap around my waist pulling me to her and I wrap my arm around her neck pulling her close to me. Our lips slowly start to move faster, the tempo of the dance going up in speed. Our breathing starts to increase as the hunger for each other starts to unravel.

I feel Alice's hand that is at my hip start to move under my shirt and a wave of arousal washes over me. I sigh in to the kiss and Alice moans softly, the sound sending electric sparks threw my lips and threw out my whole body.

I move so that Alice can straddle my waist but she doesn't budge. Our kiss continues and Alice starts to lay on her back, wait… she wants me to straddle her lap? Fine by me. I shift so that I'm straddling her lap and I tangle a hand in her hair as I pull her to me. My abdomen clenches when I feel Alice's nails scratch against my skin, slightly painful but so good.

I moan softly in to the kiss, shifting so that I can lean over her small body. My body practically covers Alice's small frame but that just means she's is practically touching every part of me. I can't help the small groan when I feel Alice's hips push against mine in a way that is just so good it's mouthwatering.

I break the kiss for some air and kiss her neck as I feel her chest rise and fall with her quick puffs of air, "Alice, what are you doing?" I ask as I kiss the skin of her neck. She pulls my head up and re connects our lips the pace of her lips going faster and faster and her fingers trail over my breast before she.

I blink twice and let out a gasp of air, did she, did she just push me off her. I shake my head and look to the side of the bed where Alice is standing up and… you're kidding. She is only in one of my shirts; how the hell did I not notice that? My breathing is labored and my head is swimming. "Alice, come on. You can't keep doing this to me." I say in outrage.

Alice leans her head to one side curious "Can't keep doing what to you? All I've done is kiss you silly." Alice says as she walks over to my dresser and grabs a come there and brushes her hair a bit. Her shirt ridding up so I can see her red panties. My mouth waters at the sight of her, "You- you… you can't keep getting me horny then just pull away!" I say shaking my head.

Alice raises an eyebrow and cocks her hip to the side in a way that looks to sexy for the current conversation. "I'm sorry I'm making you horny without ever trying Bella. I'll try to control my sexiness." She says rolling her eyes and drops the brush "Woops." She mumbles and bends over to grab it, flashing me a perfect view of her perfect but. Her red panties and white skin teasing me.

My body shifts automatically, I have to restrain myself from launching forward to her. But, she straightens up and my view is gone. She turns and I see that she places a hand on her hip and my eyes snap back up to her face where there is a smirk. "Don't even start with me." I say pointing at her and get off the bed and walk over to the bathroom where I quickly brush my teeth. Just as I'm finishing up Alice walks around me, brushing up against me "accidentally" to get her toothbrush.

I spit and rinse my mouth before walking back to the bedroom and running a brush threw my wild hair. I sigh; I need to keep away from that girl if I care about my sanity. I am to fucking horny; I mean really even for me its ridicules. I feel like a thirteen year old boy who just discovered porn. Or my friend Kat and that… that's saying something.

Hmmm, maybe I'm just acting like the 18year old girl I am, who has a supper sexy girlfriend who won't sleep with her but will tease the hell out of her. It's at a draw, my brain not wanting to cooperate after I said supper sexy girlfriend. I take of my baggy shirt and decide that I'm not the only person who can get riled up right? I walk to the bathroom shirtless and take off my pants and turn on the shower.

I take of my panties and smirk a bit to myself when I see Alice staring intently at me threw the mirror. I step in the shower acting all ignorant and get under the warm water letting it wash over my skin. I quickly grab the soap and turn around to look at Alice as I start lathering up, "So, Alice. What do you want to do today?" I ask innocently. Her eyes travel over my wet, soapy body before she opens and closes her mouth a few times before speaking.

"Um, I was thinking we… we could just, um h-hAng around the house." She says her voice getting a bit high when she says 'hang' I nod twice and duck back under the water and 'drop' the soap, "Shit." I mumble and bend over to grab the soap and I straighten and look over my shoulder to see Alice's breathing get deeper.

I wash off the soap and lather up again and sigh "Alice, baby can you do me a small favor. I can't reach my back, do you mind?" I ask turning around and hiding my wicked grin from her. Two can play this game Alice, and you should know better than to play with the girl who invented it.

I hear her clear her through "Sure." She says and she walks over and grabs the soap from my hands. I let my shoulders relax and I feel her soft hands start to massage at the skin of my back, one hand rubbing my shoulder blade while the other fallows the line of my spine. I suppress a shudder and let Alice 'wash' my back and I almost moan when she lets her nails drag across my skin. Why am I so turn on by this girl's simple touch?

When I think I'm about to combust, my plan backfiring a bit I pull away and turn to look in her dazed eyes and smile as I grab the soap from her hands "Thank you." I say and lean forward and touch my lips to hers quickly my wet hair dripping against her cheek and nose. I wink at her before turning my back to her and rinsing off before grabbing shampoo but I hear Alice speak.

"Can I do that? I love playing with your hair." She states and I smile and nod, "How can I say no to such a pretty girl." I say and I watch in silence as Alice quickly strips the shirt and panties off before jumping in the shower with me.

I hold back my small whimper as I let my eyes scan over Alice's delectable skin. She doesn't really expect me to not touch her while she's naked and now whet because she jumped in under the shower head. I watch as the crystal clear droplets run over her skin and I can't help myself, I lean forward and claim her lips.

"Thank God." I hear Alice mumble against my lips and I smirk a bit as I pin her against the cold tile feeling her flinch slightly before relaxing back in to it. I attack her lips and the kiss is frantic. I pull her naked body against mine; our skin brushing against each other's sending an electric current all threw my body.

I pull her even closer to me moaning in to her lips as I let my hand trail over her slick skin. Alice suddenly shakes her head breaking the kiss and burying her head in my neck "I can't… I'm sorry Bell, but I can't. Not yet." She says and I try to hold back a small whimper but sigh and pull her in to a hug.

"It's ok, I understand. You want to wait until I get those test results and for other reasons you don't feel like sharing just jet. It's ok, I'm still here and if it makes you feel any better." I say and pull away from her so that she can look at my eyes and I cup her face in my hands "I will never make the stupid mistake again. I will never be as stupid and ignorant as to leave you ever again. It's a promise, but I know talk is cheap. So, I will show you, I'm here to stay." I say with a small grin as I bring her lips to mine.

This kiss is less wild, more about emotion more like this morning when I woke her up and I slowly feel myself cool down and relax, I pull away with a small smile "Do you still want to wash my hair or was that just a way to get in my shower." I say. She chuckles and bites her lip "A bit of both." She admits and I kiss her nose and shifts so that I am sitting on the bathtub my back to her front.

I hear her move to sit behind me and I feel the cold liquid on my head and Alice's soft nimble fingers massage my scalp. I try to fight the shivers that run threw my back but to no avail and I hear Alice's soft giggle. "I forgot how much you like it when I scratch the back of your head." She comments easily.

I grin a bit as I let my eyes close and relax as I let her wash my short hair. "Remember that time we went to the mall and you went to get a haircut and you could barely stand the woman washing and cutting your hair because she kept scratching the back of your neck?" she asks laughing softly.

I join her laugh "yeah, it's not my fault! I just get excited when they do that." Is ay and Alice giggles and her hand slow down "Remember how you attacked me in the mall bathroom afterward?" she asks and I feel my abdomen clench a bit and the way her hands in my hair start to slow down then move gently at the base of my head making goose bumps break threw my skin.

I clear my though "Yeah." I say my voice low. "I think that was one of the craziest places we ever had sex at." She states. I chuckle a thick sounding laugh "Remember the time you seduced me in gym class?" I ask and I hear Alice laugh softly. "If I remember correctly you were all too willing." She says and she tilts my head back so that I can rinse my hair without getting soap in my eyes.

The movement itself making me rest my back against Alice's front as my head tilts back over her shoulder and Alice places a soft kiss at my through before running her hands threw my hair rinsing out the shampoo.

As soon as it's rinsed Alice puts conditioner and we resume our conversation. "If I remember correctly you were the one that made us wait until after everyone left, even coach had left and then we had sex in the showers." I say. Alice's hands still "remember the time you snuck in to my house while I was in the shower and you just slipped in with me. Then you hid under the bed until my mom left my room?" she asks laughing.

I laugh softly "Oh, and then I hid in the closet when Rose came in to talk with you about how great Emmett is in bed." I say and Alice shudders "Ew, don't remind me." she states and I laugh. I sigh and we rinse my hair and then we switch, Alice leaning back in to me while I was her hair.

She shudders when I start to wash her hair, scratching the top of her neck and I grin. "You are such a tease Alice." I state as I wash her hair calmly. "Like you're not? You totally just took a shower to seduce me." she states. I shrug "Yeah, but you should expect that from me. I don't expect to get riled up so easily by you." I say and I move so that my lips are behind her ear. "It's not my fault you make me want you so much." I say against the back of her ear making her shudder.

I lean back so that the water can rinse the suds from Alice's hair and the soap falls over her body giving me an idea. After I condition her hair I grab the soap "Lets clean you up a bit." I state and lather my hands and start to run my hands over her body. Running through every curve and crevice.

After I rinse her off I get out of the tub and rub the towel around my body and hair. "Bella… what's wrong?" Alice asks. I stop as I hear the water cut off. I take a deep breath "N-" I cut myself off. I can't keep hiding my emotions.

"Do… do you still love me?" I ask not turning around to face her. I can't face her at the moment, I can't. My body won't move. "Bella… turn around." She says. I stay still, me wanting to move but my body not wanting to comply. I hear a soft sigh before I hear footsteps hit against the tile floor of the bathroom before Alice is standing in front of me.

"Why did you ask me that?" she asks her eyes burning in to mine. "Because I wanted to know the answer." I state my eyes looking over her shoulder not being able to stay locked in her eyes. "Yes, I still love you… I just need a bit of time to trust you again." she says and I don't look in her eyes as I nod and walk around her to the bedroom.

I run a hand threw my hair as I search the closet and get a shirt and underwear and pants. I sigh and comb my hair with a half-assed effort and wait till Alice is done before we walk together in loud silence to the living room.

"Go pick a movie, I'll be right back, I just want a cig." I say and Alice smiles at me and I ruffle her damp hair. "I'm not mad that you don't trust me, short stuff. Hell, I don't even trust me most of the time." I state. Alice laughs softly and after making sure I'm A-OK she goes to the living room and I role my eyes.

"Since when do I give a fuck if my house smells like cigarettes?" I ask walking back in to the living room. Alice glares "No, no, no. I cleaned this room and maid it smell like a house, not a bar. Smoke outside." She says pointing to the door. I look at her "Are you serious?" I ask my face blank.

She nods and I grab the cigs and walk to the door "Incredible, even in my own house I'm not allowed to smoke." I state as I close the door behind me. I light up quickly taking a deep drag and almost moaning with the incredible feeling. The cold air whips around me, making my wet hair feel like ice. I take another deep drag and the warm/cold contrast makes me give out a little moan of its self.

I lean against the railing and just try to focus on smoking my cig and soon enough it starts to rain and I'm entranced by the dance the rain makes as it falls. Shifting with the wind and the dull grey sky looking darker than it should, making it looks like dusk when in reality it around ten in the morning. As soon as the cig is done I flick the useless filter in to the rain and walk back to the house and smile when I hear Alice's soft humming.

I walk to the living room and see Alice scanning threw the movie selections a few movies already in her hands, I can hear the distinct sound of popcorn in the microwave and the fire is crackling in the fireplace. I can't imagine a better sight; I don't want to disturb it just jet so I walk over to the office real quick to check my emails.

I have one from the clinic, thank freaking God I am clean. Healthy as a horse. There are a few facts about safe sex but the only person I am interested in sleeping with is downstairs probably wondering where I am. I read over the email once more before shutting down the pc and walking back down.

I sit on the couch with a small grin on my face, now… to work on that trust thing… I know I fucked up her trust in me. I promised so much and yet I left her when things got hard. Siena drilled my ass on that a few times to make it stick to my head well enough. My word is all I got and right now, my word is in the shitter.

Alice walks in with a huge bowl of popcorn, two beers and a small smile on her lips when she seems me sitting there. "Someone looks happy." She says. I chuckle "I can blame it on the nicotine high but I think it has more to do with the beautiful woman that just walked in the room." I say and Alice smile grows a bit.

"Is it bad that every time you sweet talk me like that I can't seem to think of anything other than how perfect your voice is?" she asks suddenly as she sits down next to me. I chuckle and put an arm around her and pull her to me "So... you think my voice is perfect, beautiful?" I ask at her ear as I start to place kisses along her neck.

"Bella…. Didn't… fuck, didn't I just tell you… I need some time." She says her breathing growing heavy and shallow. She doesn't pull away from me, "You want me to show you I'm sticking around right? Alice, how many times do I have to say this to you?" I ask before I pull away from her neck and get on both my knees on the floor in the total epitome of vulnerability.

"Everything I have done, since the day I met you those seven months ago, with three weeks, four days, seven hours and several minutes and second is for you. I have been in love with you since the second I laid eyes on you. The second I walked in to that Spanish class and saw that new girl sitting next to me, you had me." I say my eyes showing nothing but truth and love to her.

"You had me wrapped around your finger the moment you smiled at me and I thought my heart stopped. Even before my mind knew it my body knew I was yours. The way this electric… this electric shook crosses threw us every time we touch. I haven't cared about anyone since my dad. The pack were the closest thing I had and even that I kept at arm's length but you… you got under my wire so easy." I say kneeling on one knee.

"You, without even trying knocked down every wall I took years to build around me. Ii was so detached from emotions when I met you that I actually was scared to think that I felt something to you and I fought it so hard. But then… I gave up. I though, if she thinks I'm what she wants I will try and be it. You made me a better person and I know I hurt you that day when I threw it all down the shitter." I say and stand up and sit on the couch next to her.

"I know I hurt you and I hurt myself that day, but I did it because in some fucked up way, I thought your dad was right and I wasn't good enough for you. That all I was going to do was corrupt you and break you. I didn't want you to break, my angel. I didn't want to hurt you, but I also felt scared." I admit.

"I was scared that… I would somehow be the Veronica in our relationship that… I left without even fighting as hard as I should have. Then I had the nerve to blame you, trying to make you hate me. That… un emotional act coming back up to try and push you out. It was stupid and useless because all I could think of was you. I spend most every night in a fall trying not to cry my eyes out." I say giving her a weak attempt of a smile.

"So, please. Give me one more chance Alice. It's your choice. It's always been your choice. I will go along with, if you think we should wait a freaking year, even if it kills me and I have to spend more than a thousand dollars on fucking vibrators I will do it for you Alice. Just please tell me there is some hope in making you trust me again." I say as I lean forward pushing Alice gently so that she is lying down on the couch wile I hover over her.

"You will never be Veronica." Alice says and I clench my eyes shut and duck my head so that it's resting on her shoulder. I feel Alice's firm hand come up to hold my face tightly and make me look up, the anger in her movements being showed by her roughness with me. "Don't you dare ever compare yourself with that horrid bitch, do you hear me?" Alice all but growls at me.

I feel the air whoosh out of me, I open my mouth but I feel Alice's grip on my face tighten so that it's actually uncomfortable and hurts. The anger in her eyes showing with such a passion I think I am actually getting burned with those hazel eyes.

"My father is an idiot and a prick along with every single member of my family. And if I have to give them up for you, I will do that. It's my choice to do so." She says and I nod stiffly. "Next, don't you dare take all of the blame because you are just making me feel sick with it. I hate that you beat yourself up so much for things. It's not what I wanted. Ok? Next you think you can just give me a speech with your charming voice and burning eyes and I will just sleep with you?" she almost yells at me.

I flinch "I… It wasn't exactly my plan. But I was kinda hoping-" I'm cut off by the ground hitting my back and the air leaving my lungs as Alice walks over me and out of the living room. "Fuck, Alice!" I yell as I scramble up and catch her as she goes up the stairs and pull her to me.

"Would you stop with all this calm hostility! If you're mad at me just yell! Scream at me break shit I don't care just stop being so…. Gahhh!" I growl at her as I let her go and she pushes me away from her. She walks down the steps and to the kitchen. I fallow after her "Why do you want me to yell! What good is yelling at you?" she yells at me.

I grin "You get some steam out and for fucks sake you may even relax a bit!" I yell back though trying to not show my amusement at her. She glares at me and grabs a cup and smashes it on the floor a foot away from me. "That what you want? Me to break shit?" she yells. I shrug, knowing it will piss her off.

A plate is launched at where I was standing and I jump out of the way and walk over to her and smash a plate against the floor a few feet away from where we are standing. "I can smash shit to Alice!" I yell at her, shit this is so funny. I wish I could laugh.

She seems to see that because she pushes me away from her again and I walk back up to her and grab both her fisted hands "What? You want to hit me? just hit me, don't hold back. It's not like you can do much damage Mary Alice." I coo in a condescending voice that will make her hit me.

And I'm right as soon as I let her hands go a slap to my face is the first thing I get. I let my head angled down, my eyes shut as the stinging in my cheek actually gets me mad but I won't really get mad at her. I lift my head to fake glare at her from under some slashes of hair on my face and she brings her hand back and I grab it midair and pit it to her side.

"What are you going to do now?" I taunt and I feel her other hand connect with the side of my head fisting in my hair and I feel her tug at my hair. FUCK! That actually hurts! Shit, I need to think shit threw more. Think before you act, Bell. I shake Alice gently and pry her hand out of my hair just as she loosens her other hand and hits me on the shoulder.

"How could you just sleep with those girls afterward! Did you fuck a girl the same night we broke up!?" she asks and I feel myself freeze. Alice pulls away from me and pushes me away before marching a few steps away from me, away from the glass. "You did, didn't you. Who was it? Tanya? Heidi? Irina?... who the hell was it!" she yells.

I take a deep breath and lick my lip before looking at her "It was Tina." I say and a plate smashes at my feet, I don't flinch. "How…. Bella how can you be sweet some times and in others be such a bitch!" Alice yells.

I feel like I was slapped. "I… I'm the bitch?" I ask with humor. "yes, you are a bitch some times." Alice says her voice a bit normal. I chuckle and it starts to grow. The chuckles forming to laughs before I am almost falling on the floor laughing. I feel tears in my eyes and my side's hurt I'm laughing so hard.

"Tha… that's the best… you could come up… up with Al… al…. Alice?" I ask in-between laughter. I hear Alice's soft tinkling laugh start to form before she is laughing just as hard. We fall to the ground laughing and slowly I crawl over to her and push her slightly "I can't believe you called me a bitch," I state as my laughter dies and I take deep breaths of air.

"neither can I." she says. After a moment of silence I stand and give a hand to Alice and lift her up and lift her up to my arms and carry her bridal style to the living room and place her on the couch and slip off my shoes.

"What movie did you pick?" I ask. She sits down next to me and I wrap an arm around her and we both lay down before Alice presses play and a movie starts. "Romeo and Juliet." She says. I smile a bit "So, you want to see me drool over Leonardo DiCaprio?" I ask teasing.

She elbows me softly "No, it just seemed to be the only one that popped out." She states. I shrug and throw the quilt over us and I place a hand on Alice's abdomen. "This ok?" I ask pulling her to me a bit. She nods "yeah, it's perfect." she states. I hmm in agreement before the movie starts.

The movie in its self I know my heart so I had fun whispering the lines of Romeo in Alice's ear as she got engrossed to the movie. My voice being a bit raspy and low coming to my advantage. Soon enough some of my favorite parts started and I quieted down and got lost in the movie, yet I still whispered Romeo's lines even in my trance.

When the credits started rolling my eyes had closed long ago, I was right on the verge of sleep… or was I asleep? Hmm, I felt to calm and relaxed to be awake. I had to be dreaming, nothing could bring this amount of peace. My hand had at some point flipped under Alice's shirt and I was tracing the patch of skin under her bellybutton and above her pants with my thumb. I think that's when I feel asleep.

Me being so warm I couldn't find a most perfect place, was I even in Forks?. Alice's breathing is shallow and I feel the odd rising and falling of her chest. Is she asleep in this dream too? "Fuck, Bella, what are you doing to me?" Alice ask in a breathless whisper. I think she is talking to herself. This is a dream, it feels like a dream.

I hear her soft moan from the back of her through but my brain is still too mushed to function. What I am doing to her? I'm asleep! I feel her hips shift a bit and Alice's deep breath. "Fuck." She whispers quietly. When she moves her hips my hand drags a bit across her lower abdomen and ahhhh… that's what's wrong?

What? She's turned on by this? Hmmm, I like this dream. I snuggle her closer to me and mumble a few things that I have no idea the meaning of and I hear Alice's soft grunt when I push her but against my crotch. I lower my hand down to her crotch and cup her threw her sweat pants.

Yup, it's a dream. Alice, hates sweat pants. I pull her to me and start to rock our hips at a kinda lame slow rhythm a low moan escaping my lips. "Bella?" Alice asks breathless as I start to rub her over her pants. Shit, this dream is so good. How can I not act?

"Yo-mfleeg, amazing." I try to say you feel amazing. Does my brain not work in this dream? I don't care, I just want to feel her. I want her, even if this dream is all I can have. "You've got…. To be kidding me… your trying to… sleep fuck me?" Alice asks in between soft pants.

I shift so that my leg is over her hip and kinda pull her under me and snuggle my head in her neck. "GodIlobyou" I mumble sleepily as I slide my hand around her form. This dream is slow and painful. Its kinda pissing me off but teasing me all at the same time. "Bella… fuck, Bella wake up." Alice says. I snuggle my head deeper in the dream.

I feel so at peace and calm, this has to be a dream. I haven't felt like this in so long, my life is hectic and crazy. This is calm, peaceful… I feel my leg cramp. Fuck, I let go of Alice and open my eyes and then it hits me.

It wasn't a dream. I actually touched Alice half a sleep… how stupid can I actually be to think that I was asleep? Shit, I scratch my head and look at Alice to see her looking up at me confused. I take a deep breath "Alice, I am so sorry." I say and try to move off her but my leg is a sleep and its kinda painful. Like a thousand little needles poking at my leg.

"Ah." I grumble as I leave my leg still and try not to move. "What's wrong?" Alice asks. "Um, my leg feel asleep…. Its kinda what made me realize I wasn't dreaming." I mumble feeling a blush creep up my cheeks. I duck my head to look at my leg, I am such a dork.

I feel Alice's soft small hand lift my head up and I stare at her, "I want you." Alice says softly cupping my cheek and moving my lips to hers. I kiss her tentatively but when I feel her hand cup my breast I shake my head "No, you don't. You just told me that you needed time." I say. Alice snuggles in to my neck and kisses it with open mouth kisses until she reaches my ear and she bites the earlobe.

"I miss you, I need you Bella. I've craved your body for too long, trust me that this is what I want." She says. I swallow thickly, "Are you sure?" I ask once more, weaker than the first time I asked her. I can't fight this, she needs to tell me right now that she doesn't want me or I will snap and take her.

**/if you don't like sex scenes jump to the next safe mark. /**

"Make love to me Bella." Alice says in a low voice that's sends a shiver through my hold body. I connect our lips with a want bigger than anything I have ever felt. Wilder then the want I showed her the first time we made love. This feeling of want so big I'm sure she could feel the untamed monster scratching behind my skin.

I grab her hips and straddle one thy as I pin her to the couch kissing her with everything I have. All my emotion let lose. My hands go under her shirt and paw at her skin while hers knot in my hair and on my back, scratching at my shirt. I pull her so close to me that my thigh drags across her crotch.

Alice moans in to the kiss and I bite at her lip, I break the kiss to throw her shirt of her and take off my own at the same time. We both aren't wearing bra's, nice. I let my eyes stare down at her body. I saw her this morning but still, her body is so beautiful its stunning. "You are the most beautiful woman on this earth." I say letting my eyes look at her eyes that shine with a hunger and lust.

I place a hand at her neck and trail it down her body, then I fallow the curve of her breast to her flat stomach as I let my eyes watch her skin. "Your more beautiful than me Bella." She states. I give her an eye role as I watch her ribs go up and down with each deep breath before I lean forward and connect our lips once more.

"Sure, Alice. Scars are so pretty." I mumble as I re connect our lips, me leaning over her body, our breasts brushing across each other's and pressing together so perfectly it just makes me wetter then I already was. I wrap and arm around her waist pulling her up against me so we are pressed perfectly together.

"Beautiful, so torturing beautiful." I say against her lips before moving down her neck placing down open mouth kisses to each part of skin I can get my mouth on. I reach the valley of her breasts in no time and quickly I take one peak in my mouth and let it harden in my mouth before nibbling at it and sucking. I hear Alice's moan and her body arch to me as I suck at her perfect breast, all the while palming the other.

I switch when I think it's an adequate time, not wanting to hurt her as I start the same process with her other breast. Kissing it, licking it, blowing on it, nibbling at it and sucking it. Alice's moans leading me on while I do so.

I break apart from her breasts to continue down her stomach, her soft skin to tempting its driving me crazy. I nibble, suck and lick at her skin as her hand knots in my hair and her hips thrust against my bare chest remind me of where she wants me. "What do you want, Alice?" a tease as my hand runs across the hem of her pants.

"Bella, I though.. we were past all this teasing." She groans. I smile against her skin "Oh, but I have to make up for a week of your teasing Alice. I want you to want me to so much it hurts in such a good burn." I purr as I start to pull down at her pants slowly. Her black lacy underwear coming to view.

"Where you expecting me to see these?" I ask as I bite at her lacy panties and tug at them but don't take them off. "Ahhh, no." Alice moans as her thigh's part giving me perfect access to her. I tug the pants off of her body and start to kiss and rub my way up her thighs.

I place a kiss at the top of her mound, were her clit should be before leaning up and biting at the edge of her panties. Alice lifts her hips up to help me and I gently pull them down with my mouth making sure to release a breath of hot air across her wet center, the smell of her arousal mouthwatering to me.

I pull it fully away from her and place a hand on each knee and pull her knees apart to see at her perfect center. I feel my abdomen clench just at the sight of her. I take a deep breath to try and clear my head as I look up to Alice. Her hair looks wild at the crown of her head and her eyes are lazy but intense starting at me as her mouth is slightly open as her chest rises and falls with each breath.

I lick my lips and Alice reaches forward and pushes me back and straddles my lap, She connects our lips in a wild dance "God, I want you." Alice groans against my lips as her hips thrust against my own making my abdomen clench on its own free will. "I want every part of you." I say breathless in to the kiss as I feel both her hands cup my breasts roughly and I moan in to her mouth.

Alice pushes me roughly back on the couch and pins me there as her hands massage my breast in such an appetizing way. I arch my back to Alice and she breaks the kiss to take my breast in her mouth. God, fucking foreplay is good but shit, I just want her. "Don't tease me." I groan and I feel her bite down on my breast making my head snap back as I moan escapes me. "Fuck… oh, fuck." I moan and gasp out.

"God, you are such a masochist." Alice says against my breast as she switches. "Shut up." I gasp as she starts to suck on my other breast. Fuck, this can't feel so good. It should be illegal. I don't think it helps that I have been so fucking horny that I could have dry humped a lamppost in a skirt.

"Nah, I like hearing you moan too much to shut up." Alice says against my breasts before biting down again. I feel my hips move on their own accord looking for friction. I feel Alice's hand go to my waist "eager?" she asks pinning my hips to the couch. "Horny." I state as I reach down and slide my pants down. I feel Alice's hands push mine away and I lay back down on the couch as she slide's my pants down then with her mouth like I did she pulls my panties down driving me right on the border of wanting to combust.

I pull her body flush against mine and nip at her ear "As much as I love foreplay, if I don't feel your body on mine I don't think I will be able to function." I say as I slide my hand down Alice's body and cup her mound. Alice moans softly as I run a finger threw her slick slit.

God, she is so wet its painful for me. I kiss my way down to Alice's neck "You feel so good, baby." Say before I tease at her entrance, only entering the tip of my finger. "Fuck, Bella." She says and I slide the finger knuckle deep and kiss Alice under the ear. I retract the finger and shift so that Alice is lying on the couch and I insert two fingers in to her. I feel Alice's walls clench around my fingers.

I moan softly "God, Alice." I breath as I start to move my hand rocking both our body's to the rhythm I set. My body pushing my hand at a fine rate. Alice's moans bounce off the walls and the fire burning and the dark room just set the mood so perfectly its cliché.

"God, I missed you….. oh fuck Bella…. I missed you." Alice breathes in between loud moans. I swallow as I start placing kisses up her neck "God, I missed you Alice. I missed your body." I say as my pace starts to quicken. I can be gentle and loving later, right now I just want to fuck her. I want to feel her body. I want to hear her yell my name.

My pace quickens and my lips play with her breast while I still rock our body's to this wild pace. I hold back a grunt as I can't get enough air in my lungs, I break away to breathe just to have my lips captured my Alice. Funny part is she's moaning so much she can't kiss me back.

I grin against her lips as I place my thumb on her clit and start to rub in circles. My body rocks Alice's small form but I feel the shudders run threw her body. Is she close or having an epileptic attack? Hmmm… "Say my name." I whisper against her ear as I push against Alice and I feel her groan as she arches against my body. "Bella." She breaths.

"Louder, baby. Say my name." I purr as I play with her clit and just as she's about to she spasms and clenches around me. I grin against her neck as she takes a breath "Be-Be-Bellaaaaaaa" she moan/yells as she comes. My fingers getting coated with her slick cum. Her body shakes and spasms and her eyes clench shut as it rocks her body. I don't stop my movements as her body shakes but I don't want to stop.

I keep gong and when I hear Alice's soft moan I know it's working. I kiss and lick my way from her breast to her neck and I feel Alice sigh a moan "Bella, what are you doing?" she asks a bit breathless. I duck my head to her shoulder "Making you feel good." I say and those are the last words we speak until her body rocks with her second orgasm.

**~~~~~~Safe to read mark~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

I collapse to the side my own body yearning for touch, burning with it as I lay there exhausted next to Alice. I don't expect her to return the favor, she wants time from me. From my bullshit so that she can think about trusting me. I know she said she wanted to give it back but, I doubt it.

I slide my way out of the couch and walk over to the fireplace and sigh as I think about what to do and trying to keep my mind off my little problem. I hear Alice move on the couch "Bella, what are you doing?" she asks. I lift my head "Hmm?" I ask turning around to look at her.

"What are you doing, come back over here." She says with a smile. I study her for a second and in her eyes, I see a flash of determination and fear. I grin at her as I walk over, I lean over to kiss her, but making sure my body doesn't touch hers. I shouldn't do this, I cheated my way in to her pants. I grab my shirt and sweat pants from the floor while I kiss her, this is going to be a douche bag move. I know it is.

I break the kiss and stand and walk away from Alice. "Bella? Where are you going?" she asks. I stop and sigh "I'm going to take a cold shower." I say with humor as I walk up the steps and I hear Alice curse and a bang from downstairs as I dash up to my room. What is wrong with me? she wanted me! she wanted to give me pleasure and I… "Fuck!" I growl out as I throw the shirt and sweat pants against the wall.

I knot a hand in my hair in anger. Is it her or is it me, that's scared?... this is stupid. I turn to walk out of the room when I see Alice leaning against it, only a shirt over her and her head is leaning on the door as she stares at me. "What is going on with you?" she asks her eyes soft, a slow ember burning in them.

I open my mouth but not words come out as I know a hand in my hair and tug "I don't know." I state my voice sounding desperate. "I want you but, when I know that you have some doubt about us, about me. I…I can't make myself go for it. You! you are driving me insane!" I start out talking and end up yelling the end and turning my back on her. I run a hand threw my hair before turning back to look at her "You with your… big eyes and adorable nose and spiky hair and pixie like ugh! You're driving me insane!" I yell again as I sit down on the bed, my back to her and lean my elbows on my knees and rest my head in my hands.

"Bella, am I really the problem here or is it you. I trust you, I told you so and I told you that because I feel it. I think your more afraid of yourself and how you will react then for me being afraid." She states sitting next to me on the bed.

"It's not that I'm afraid… the only thing I fear is losing you, I told you this already. But, you're here. I can see you, feel you, I can feel that you're not leaving me so I don't get how its me." I state and lay down on the bed, my hands covering my head in exasperation.

"Maybe you're afraid I'll leave you, seeing as you left me first." She states placing a hand on my stomach. I feel her draw patterns on it and I take my hand off my face and look at her "Will you leave me?" I ask. Alice bites her lip and looks out the window over my bed before looking back at me. "It's never been an option for me, to tell you the truth. The only reason I even considered trying was just to spite my family with venom words and actions. At night I would more or less crumble in to nothing Bella, you weren't the only one that was hurt when we broke up." She states.

I sigh "I know that, I know I hurt you and maybe that's why I'm so scared. I'm terrified of breaking anymore promises to you." I say to her. Alice smiles down at me and rubs her hand up and down my stomach re awakening a wanting nagging feeling. "The only promise you're breaking is the one where we are equals in this relationship." She says.

I lift myself on my elbows and raise an eyebrow "We are equals." I say. She smirks down at me "Then why are you the only one that does the fucking." She states and I feel my abdomen clench. I grin a bit "Think you can fuck me?" I ask my arousal coming back. Alice grins and leans forward to capture my lips in an intense kiss "All you have to do is sit back and relax, I'll make you moan my name in no time." She says and I shudder as she straddles me and I feel her bare mound rub against my own and I moan softly.

**Another sex scene**

Alice leans over me and I lean forward to kiss her but she pushes my back and shakes her head as she grinds on me "I'm controlling this one." She says and I smirk and role us over so that I'm hovering over her "Sure you are." I say condescendingly and I feel Alice push me off of her and she straddles my lap pinning my arms over my head roughly as she grinds on me.

I arch my back and she chuckles "You're so responsive." She states. I look in her eyes "I'm forever horny." I joke and I feel Alice cup my core but instead she just grazes it and takes off her shirt.

She pins my arms again and leans forward kissing me before holding my arms up "Don't move them." She warns. I role my eyes and leave them as Alice starts to kiss her way down my body focusing on my breast for a few minutes before trailing down my body until I hear her breath fan across my slick center.

"I missed your smell, I wonder if you still taste as good." She says and I'm about to answer when she licks and my voice is lost in a moan. Alice licks me over and over again until I am panting. I feel her slide two fingers in to me and she starts to rock us to her rhythm.

She bites at my lip when we kiss and I knot a hand in her hair as I move my hips to meet her thrusts before Alice slides off me and I am left wanting more of her. I'm about to start convincing and begging her to come back when I see her grab the strap on from my night stand and strap it on her before grabbing the sensible lube and lathering it up.

She walks back over to me and in two swift movements she is laying in the bed with me. She kisses my lips, her pants and sweat covered forehead grinning at me. I party my thighs for her and she slides easily before she enters me. She starts thrusting in to me over and over again in this sick quick rhythm I love until I feel myself close.

She won't push me over the edge. "A-Alice, please. Right there…. Fuck, yes…. Ugh, right there…. Damn, I'm so close…." I gasp out as Alice thrust against my G-spot. She trails a hand down and start to rub my clit but it won't push me over, I don't know what is wrong but it's not doing its effect.

"I love you." Alice states and I feel my heart stutter and clench. My body freeze and spasm and just like that my orgasm rocks threw my body like a damn bursting. "Alice!" I yell as I cum. My body spasms, shakes and quakes in an orgasm so intense I black out for a minute. Once it's over I feel Alice pull out of me and a minute later I feel her snuggle in to me -dildo free.

**Safe to read again!**

I try to get my breathing under control as I feel the afterglow start to hum threw me. I lean over to the nightstand and grab my cigs and lighter and light up. I relax back on the bed taking a long drag as my mind still swims with my orgasm. It had been so long, I forgot it could feel this good. Could you really blame me for loving sex so much? I mean really? sex is the fucking greatest thing ever.

Correction, sex with Alice is the best thing ever. Ha! Your all fucked. Wait… who am I talking to?... I'm losing it. I take another drag and I feel Alice tug at my hand and take it from my hand and smokes a few pulls before placing it in my mouth and running a hand from my cheek, down my jawline, neck, ribs, stomach and back up.

I finish the cig with the help of Alice and snuggle in to her neck. "God, I missed you. I love you, two. I love you more than anything, you are the perfect person." I state and I hear Alice's soft chuckles. We cuddle for a bit but I can't fight the grin off my face.

"I got laid!" I yell in satisfaction. "Fucking finally!" I yell and I hear Alice laughing at me. "Oh, hush up. I went down on you and fucked you a week ago. I haven't had sex in like…. Three weeks, plus your teasing that's like… like half a year in Bella time." I say and Alice slaps my arm playfully.

She snuggles in to my side "I love you." she says. I kiss the top of her head and lean my forehead on hers "I love you two." I say and we kiss tenderly, emotionally. Rejoicing that we are officially back together and that we are ok.

"Good night." Alice whispers and I smile as I kiss her cheek, lips, nose, forehead, eyelids, temple, jaw. Everywhere I could reach "Good night my angel." I say and just like that she falls asleep in my arms and I look up at the roof and smile a bit. "Looks like I finally did something right old man." I say sadly, nostalgia at missing my father.

I feel tears wanting to burn in my eyes "I didn't commit your same mistake." I say with a grin. Life… life is looking up for me. And for the first time in so long I can breathe and I fall to sleep in a matter of seconds.

**A/N: there it is! a looooooooooooooong chap just for you guys. Shout out to my friends that are going through some tuff shit right now, you know who you are. This one was for you guys, dedicated with all my love. Lol. Marc, you owe me :P**


	67. Chapter 67

_**A/N: I know some of you aren't thrilled that Alice forgave Bella so quickly, but I never said she actually forgave her. Remember Alice also fucked up and changed during the whole time away from Bella. *Smirk* This story is a hole web of crazy shit, you should know this by now. Continue reading.**_

_**I don't own twilight!**_

_**Ch.67**_

_**Apov**_

I can't believe what I have done. I mean, I can. I had sex with Bella, Bella and I had sex. I missed her body, she missed mine. We are practically living together and in reality I don't regret it. I will never regret anything I do with Bella... but… I don't think I trust her just yet.

I mean, I trust that she loves me. I just don't trust that she won't disappear if my father tries anything again. That she won't disappear if we get in a huge fight. Before the break up, us separating wasn't an option, hell Bella didn't even leave if she was mad. But all the shit that went down before we broke up and during the time we did… it changed us. For the better or worse I can't tell. I just know I changed and I know that Bella changed.

And now that the option of leaving for my safety is in her mind… she just might do it again. I don't think I will survive that. She says she is to selfish to leave me again, that's bull. Because if something she did made her doubt how good she is for me, she will leave in a heartbeat even if it kills her.

Hell, she may even just stop her heartbeat. I shudder at the thought. I take the cig in my mouth and take it out as I blow the sweet smoke out and look over my shoulder at a sleeping Bella on the bed. I'm on the balcony, in the middle of the night thinking about what the fuck I just did.

I grin a bit, shit… Bella is just too fucking good in bed. I can't help it, she is so good. Then all the sweet nothings she says while we make love. But, now I am freaking out a bit because we haven't gotten the test results yet. What if Bella has something and now I got it to? Not that I would dump her but shit, it puts a damper on things… craaap. I blame it on the way her eyes burn in to mine telling me I'm the only one she sees. Bella is an intense person; she's also a gut person.

Meaning that if her gut instincts tell her to do something, it's very hard to make her not do it. Bella… a lot of things come to mind when I think of Bella. She's so complex and yet… so very simple all wrapped in one.

Even now, that I know her so well and she knows me. I still feel like there are more layers of Bella then the one's I've seen. She's so privet and guarded yet, she's open and loving. Or is that luxury just for me?

I chuckle as I take another drag of the cig. Bella…. My Bella…. What am I going to do with you? You say I drive you crazy… but it's you that drives me so insane. You make me angry, sad, happy, exited, calm, safe, scared…. So many contradictory emotions run through me when I'm with you. Sometimes I even doubt your real, and I fear that I may wake up and see that this… all of it has been just a horrid dream. Horrid because it was fake.

I take the last drag and put out the cig on the ashtray and I look up at the surprising clear night. I can see the full moon shining in the depth of night and the starts dance in a lost tune only they know. I sigh and knot a hand in my hair before running it over my face and dropping it to my side.

I love Bella. I know this, I feel it. I always have, since day one I am hers. But… what is this un rational fear I feel when she's not in my line of sight. It's not like she is going to vanish into thin air…

I walk back in to the room and close the sliding glass door behind me as I make my way back to bed. I look at the sleeping form of Bella, her face emotionless, her body slightly curled to the side, her naked back to me. Even now in the dark of night I can see her tattoos and her scars.

"_Sure Alice, because scars are so pretty." _Bella had told me. I tilt my head and look at her tattoos. Her blood pin on her left shoulder blade. The angel and devil girl on the center of her neck and the tribal yin and yang on her right shoulder blade. Three different tattoos that have a distinct meaning to her.

They are all different, yet they are still the same. The way they were drawn makes them look like they all go together. She must have gone to the same tattoo artist for each one. I let my eyes trail down her back and I see the faint scars there and they get more prominent at the side of her left hip.

Where she had skidded when the car slammed in to her bike, her bike saving her life but still, the peace of metal had stabbed her abdomen. I bite my lip, my girl… I suddenly see a lot of scars on Bella. Suddenly my eyes cloud over and I see her body laced with scars and I see the side of her face the same way.

I shake my head and hold back a scream but when I open my eyes the scars are gone. Nothing on her skin, it looks smooth and creamy. I take a deep breath, what the hell… what was that?

Suddenly my mind clicks… are those her emotional scars? Something in my gut tells me they are. I shake my head and take a deep breath, I'm going crazy. I must be… who the hell sees emotional scars? I shake my head, must have been my imagination. But… if they were her emotional scars….. she's been hurt so much and I only saw her back, arm and part of her face… I'm scared to see the rest of her.

I shake my head; there are no scars on her. It was just a figment of my imagination. But somehow I know… she's been hurt exactly that much. I shake my head, I need some sleep. I lie down on the bed and almost instantly I feel Bella's arm instinctually wrap around my waist pulling me closer to her body.

I look over my shoulder at her face but see that she is still deep asleep. "Bella." I say softly. Nothing. "Bella." I say normally and I see her eyes twitch under her eyelids. "Hmmm?" she asks… or did she state that? "Are you awake?" I ask. I hear her deep intake of air as her head lifts a bit off her pillow and she shakes her head "No, go back to sleep baby… I'm here." She says in a grumbled sleepy voice.

I'm shocked by what she added 'I'm here?' I know she's here. She pulls me closer to her body, my face in her neck and then she throws the blanket over us. "I'm here…. You can relax…I'm here." She mumbles before her head goes lip back in the pillow and her arms loosen there hold just a fraction.

I stay still for a few minutes and three minutes later a soft, almost in audible snore leaves her mouth. I smile a bit and snuggle in her chest. "God, I love you Bella." I say snuggling in to her neck and placing a soft kiss there. I feel her twitch in her sleep like a sleeping puppy. I snuggle deeper in to the bed and the warmth that is Bella and I'm asleep in no time.

**Bpov**

I wake up to my doorbell ringing like crazy. I look in my arms to see Alice asleep happily in my arms. I kiss her head and I hear the doorbell again and I sigh and get out of bed. I'm naked, sweet. I shuffle around my room grabbing a sweat pants and a baggy shirt and throw it on before walking down the stairs. The doorbell sounds again "Hold your horses, I'm coming!" I yell as I walk through the foyer and open my door.

I pull the door open and I'm faced with… the Cullen's. I stop for a long moment, "Um, do you have the wrong house?" I ask scratching my head as I run a hand through my hair. "No, were here to talk with you Bella." Dr. Cullen says. I nod but my eyes are wary, I don't trust this little act. I step back from the door. "Come on in, no need to stay in the cold." I say.

They all walk in to the foyer and their eyes go wide. "You have a lovely house, Bella." Esme says softly. I frown. "Um… thank you. Me and my father decorated it when we moved in." I say as I lead them over to the living room. "Um, I'm sorry this is… weird. Can I help you?" I ask them.

The Cullens share a look. "Well… is Alice here?" Esme asks. I frown but I see Emmett roll his eyes. "Yes, she is here. Do you wish to speak to her?" I ask. They nod and I nod. "One moment." I say as I walk out to the foyer and dash up the stairs. I slam my door open waking Alice up.

"Whaaats the matter Bella?" Alice asks yawning. I smile at her. "Um… your parents are downstairs." I state. Her eye snap open. "What?" she asks. I bite my lip. "The Cullens, yeah… they're in my freaking house." I state and Alice jumps off the bed and runs to the bathroom.

"Shit, shit, shit." she states as she starts to work her magic on herself. She's only wearing one of my shirts. I smile a bit as I walk after her to the bathroom and while she brushes her teeth I walk up behind her pushing her up against the counter and start to kiss at her neck.

She is just too freaking sexy, I can't help it. "Bella…" Alice warns but her head tilts giving me better access. I start to place open mouth kisses wile my hands slide under her shirt and cup her breast and the other pulls her hips to mine.

"Fuck… Bella, my parents… are just downstairs." She says in short little gasps. I pull her even closer to me, her but brushing against my crotch grinding so temptingly. "Want me to kick them out?" I ask as I drag my lips up to the base of her ear and I hear Alice moan, "Fuck, Bella. Stop we can't have sex while they are downstairs." Alice says pushing her but to my crotch pushing me back a step. I sigh and grab my toothbrush and quickly brush my teeth and comb my hair.

Alice is about to walk away and I smack her butt, "Get dressed." I say looking at her threw the mirror as she stares back at me. "I'll get you for that." She says before walking out of the room. I grin and make my way out of the room after whistling at a naked Alice and dash down the steps. I walk in to the living room.

"Um, she will be right out. I just woke her up." I say and sit on my recliner. "So… you live in this house alone?" Esme asks. I bite my lip and nod. "Yeah, I mean. My dad lived with me for the first year but he got called back to the hospital and he stayed there another year before he passed away. And even when he was here he was sheriff so I practically lived alone." I say with a shrug.

"Oh, that must have been horrible." Esme says softly. I frown. "Um, not really. I was… used to him not being around that much." I say licking my lips. "And how's the company going?" Carlisle asks. My frown deepens as suspicion settles in. "Its going fine, better than ever." I say and Carlisle nods his head.

"Good, good." He says nodding, I run a hand through my hair "Look, you… don't have to pretend to like me. Alice is on her way and we just have to act civil, if you can manage that." I say my voice hardening as I look over to them. "But I will warn you: I will not be disrespected in my own house. Nor will I allow Alice to be upset, are we clear?" I ask my eyes studying her family.

Esme nods but Carlisle's eyes harden a bit at being ordered around. "I didn't have to let you in Sir. So I would appreciate some type of civility from you if that is possible at all." I say my voice hard. He gives me a nod and I nod back to him. Just then Alice shows up and I smile at her, "Hey, Al." I say and she chuckles at me.

"Hey, guys." She says as she comes over to me and sits at the arm of my chair. "Are you two…" Carlisle trails off. Alice looks at me and I smirk. "No." I answer. "We are not back together. Sadly some damages can't be undone." I say my eyes flashing to Dr. Cullen.

"Where are you sleeping?" Esme asks. Alice answers. "A spare room on the second floor." She says. "Why did you even stay?" Rose asks her and I bite back a smile. This is an interrogation? I thought it was going to be a conversation. "When Bella came back from a… trip she was sick. I didn't think it was safe to leave her in her house alone while she was so out of it. I came back and then I remembered that I don't like living in your house so I asked Bella if I could stay for a while, thankfully she said yes." Alice says.

I click my tongue, "Well, do any of you want anything to drink?" I ask. "Sure." Em speaks for the family. I nod, Alice stands. "I'll help you." she says. I shrug and we walk to the kitchen once we are there Alice turns to me.

"Why did you tell them we aren't together?" she whisper yells. I shrug as I open the fridge and grab the six pack of coke and a spare one for me. "I didn't want to start this with dramatics. They don't like me, I don't like them. But, I want you to like them because you're supposed to like them. It should have nothing to do with me." I say with a smile.

Alice steps closer. "Your just trouble in their eyes." She mumbles as she steps at the point of her feet. I look down at her as our noses graze. "What about in your eyes?" I ask. She smiles. "In mine, your just a tease." She says as she kisses me and I feel her cup my crotch. I moan into her mouth and Alice rubs against the crotch of my pants before winking and leaving me there as she grabs the bag of chips from the table and walks out.

I let out my breath in a whoosh, and clear my thought. I walk back to the living room and place the sodas on the coffee table as Alice pours the chips in the bowl and I grab a soda for her and hand it to her. I sit back in my chair and drink from my can. "So…" I say and scratch my neck. "Ugh, I have to make an important call for work. So, Alice you can handle this." I say as I stand up.

I walk to the entrance and nod to the family and share a quick look with Alice before I walk up to the office and start with some paper work and making calls. I wasn't kidding, I was behind on work. I left the door to the office open just in case I hear yelling, if I do I will without a doubt kick Alice's family out of my house.

**Apov**

Traitor! Is the only thought I can scream in my head as Bella walks out of the living room. I sigh, she has been neglecting work. I shrug and slide in to the recliner like Bella, "So, wanted something?" I ask my family. Dad looks at the door and stares at me. "What are you thinking leaving home without even telling us?" he asks. I frown. "I told you I was going gout with some friends camping. Like the tent?" I ask with a smile.

Emmett is the only one that smiles and laughs. "Well, I for one think it's awesome." He says. I laugh "I don't find this humorous Alice. We have been worried sick, all Emmett would tell us is that your safe and that you would come back when you were ready until we finally figured out you would be here." Mom says.

I grin at Em. "Right on big bro." I say and he reaches forward for me to hit my fist with his. "So, you found me. What's the great thing you wanted to tell me?" I ask them. "We want you to come home." Dad says. I shake my head. "No, I'm not leaving this house until me and Bella are back together." I say no need for them to know that we already are.

"That's not practical." Dad says. I shrug. "You broke us up, now I'm trying to fix the mess you created." I say and Dad sighs and puts a hand on his chin. "You do know I actually thought it was the right thing for you." he says. I scoff. "Sure you did." I say and I see my family frown at me.

"Since day one all I have asked you guys to do is be civil towards Bella. To just be nice to her and she has always been polite to you, even when you didn't deserve it. So I'm sorry that I don't really care if you like her anymore. Hell, I don't care if you even like me anyone. As far as I'm concerned my family just vanished." I say looking at them.

"You would actually leave us, for her?" Rose asks. I look at her. "Would you leave us for Emmett?" I ask her. She pauses but doesn't answer. I look at Dad. "Would you leave mom for us?" I ask him. His jaw clenches but he doesn't answer me either and I look at Jazz. "Would you?" I ask him.

My family is silent, "I am tired of people undermining my feelings. I am capable of caring. I am capable of loving even more then all of you. And so is Bella. She loves me, I can still see it somewhere deep in her eyes." I say, another lie. I can see it in her gaze, everywhere.

"Alice, we don't want you to leave the family. We love you." he says and I look at the rest of the family's eyes. I take a sip of the soda. "Mom… Dad… guys…. I'm not the same push over I was when I was with Gina. I know how to respect myself and I know what a bad relationship is. I'm not some kid that is unable to make decisions. Hell, Edward is my little brother and you all act like I'm the child." I say standing from the recliner in exasperation.

"We know you're not, we just hate for you to be hurt again." Mom says and I turn to look at her. "The only people hurting me are you guys." I state my eyes burning with unshed tears. "You think I like being angry at you all? Hating you? I hate it even more. But you guys are forcing my hand, here. I'm torn between what I've always known and what I want. And if you make me chose, I have already made my decision. Its Bella… its always been Bella." I say looking at them.

I see Emmett nod at me and I send him a weak smile but the rest of my family's face is ashen. Edward looks at me. "I don't want you to choose, I've never had a problem with Bella. My only concern was the way she treated you but even when you fought with her in the parking lot and hit her she never raised a hand to you. That spoke volumes on its own." He says and I send him a small smile.

Rose sighs. "I've already earned her distrust, and I do regret it seeing as you told us the reason she is how she is. I would like to earn my way into her goodwill if that is possible." Rose says. I look at Jazz to see his smile grow. "What can I say, she has a great mind for military debates. I can't argue with how much I like her." He says with a shrug. Emmett booms in. "She is the most awesome person ever! I have always liked her." He says and jumps up to hug me.

I laugh and he places me down and all the siblings look at our parents. "We acted wrongly, and without good reason. We never gave her the chance to show us what she was like, I would like to turn that around… that is of course if you ever get back together." Esme says.

Dad is silent, his eyes pierced as he thinks. "She's been through a lot, and I was in the wrong. But I do not trust her, there is something about her I do not trust." He says placing a finger to his temple. I frown. "Why? What has she ever done?" I ask him. His lips purse… "I don't like that she has slept around." He states.

I pause. "She's changed." I say. He lifts his eyes to look at me. "She's a player, a womanizer a lothario! What is to say she will not play you exactly the same way she has the rest of the town." He says anger leaking in to his voice. "What is a matter with you? Is it something to do with Bella or is it something to do with her family?" I ask.

Dad frowns. "Charlie Swan was not a man to be trusted. I knew him in the force, he was part of the brotherhood I was in. It was an honor to fight alongside him but that was about it. The man kept to himself and was cold. Not to mention he was a drunk and a womanizer." He states.

I freeze. "Charlie… he cheated on Bella's mom while he was away?" I ask. Dad frowns but nods and I place a hand on my forehead. "Shit, this is going to kill Bella." I state. "Not really, seeing as I already lost all respect for the bastard." I hear Bella's voice say. My head snaps to the entry way to see a dark look in Bella's eyes.

I frown. "Bella…" I say but she walks over to me and to her fireplace where to huge portrait is at, "My father was a bastard. There is no doubt in my mind of that. In his mind I am just like him. But I do like that word you used Dr. Cullen. Lothario, I haven't heard that word in a long time. I did know the word 'wolf' though. That's what my father used to call me." she says her voice turning hard.

She turns to stare at my father. "But, I lament informing you _sir."_ She scoffs the word. "That I am not my father in any way, shape, or form. I used to think that me being like him gave me a certain connection to him, but no. It is not who I am, sure I have my way's with woman. I have some charm that I got from him, but my father did not know how to stop nor when he had something of worth. In that aspect, I surpass him." She states her shoulders looking stiff.

"Now, this is terribly rude of me but I would appreciate it if you left my house. He may not live but he still deserves a level of respect being your superior and my father and you being in his house slandering his name, even if it is the truth will not be tolerated." Bella says her voice burning like charcoal. I can see the flame of anger in her stiff posture, in the way her voice shows anger and the way her eyes are zeroed in on my father.

My father stands from his seat. "I apologize if I insulted you." he says and Bella smirks. "No you don't, you feed off of it. The army may have not harmed you physically but it really did fuck up your mind. You think you are better than anyone else because you fought in a war? I lament dethroning you, but you are actually worth less just for that aspect. Now get out of my house before I do something that absolutely I will not regret." Bella almost growls as she glares at my father before walking out of the room but stopping at the thresh hold.

"Thank you for your visit, please return but hopefully with an attitude adjustment." She says before she walks out and her footsteps fade. Emmett shakes his head at our father. "That was not acceptable, you owe her an apology." He hisses as he walks out of the room the family following him.

I open the door for my family and I am surprised to see that my mother lingers to give me a kiss on the cheek and a "Stay as long as you want, you will always be welcome home." She says and after an 'I love you' exchange I see mom get in the car with Rose and Dad drives out alone.

I shut the door and turn, the house sounds quiet. This can't be good, Bella… even though she is reserved is very loud. I walk up the stairs thinking that is where she was at and I walk to the office and see her in here at her desk.

"Jenks, I don't really care. I want you to e mail those papers to me now…. Then stop what you are doing and tell your secretary to send them… then hire a new one! It's not my fault you sleep with every secretary! Get an ugly one for once and keep it in your pants." She snaps at Jenks on the phone.

"Just…. Keep it professional." Bella says before she hangs up her cell and rest her head on the desk. "Why am I surrounded by idiots?" she asks no one. I chuckle. "Well, it's good to know you think so highly of me." I tease lightheartedly. Bella's head lifts up and she smirks. "Hey, did they leave?" she asks. I nod. "Yup, and they are hopefully not coming back for a long time." I say as I walk over to her and straddle her lap on her chair.

She sighs. "I shouldn't have let what he said about my father hit me like that." She says. I shake my head and rub my nose to hers. "You had the right to be angry at him, he had the nerve to talk shit about your dad in your dad's house. Even my family is mad at him." I say and Bella chuckles.

She rubs my thighs up and down as she looks over her desk and clicks her tongue. "I have so much work to do." She says in a tired tone. I chuckle and kiss her neck a few times before kissing her lips softly "Then get to work, I'll cook us some dinner. Is pasta ok?" I ask.

She nods and looks at me and cups my cheek with her hand and goes to kiss me, but I stop her. "Bell, we aren't having sex until we get the test results back." I say and she grins. "I got them back yesterday, I'm clean." She says. I freeze. "Really?" I ask. She nods and tugs me down to her and kisses me. Yes! My girl's clean!

I kiss her back, letting my tongue slide past her eager lips as we deepen the kiss and Bella groans when her phone beeps. She breaks the kiss with a pant and leans her forehead on mine as she catches her breath. "I really need to get to work." She groans. I smile and kiss her again. "Perfect, it will get me a chance to make a proper romantic dinner. And we can make today our first official date about us being back together." I say.

She nods. "Fine by me." she says and after a few quick kisses I walk out of the study leaving the door open as I walk down to the kitchen to get ready. This is going to be a nice date.

**A/N: here it is! hope you guys like it.**

**I want to encourage all that never Review to Review and all of those who do to also do it. I want to see how many of you actually read this story! Lol.**


	68. Chapter 68

**A/N: yei! Love all your comments. Lol, I do in fact know who reads this story but Reviews inspire me and pump me up. :P hahahhh**

**I do not own twilight! **

**Ch.68**

**Bpov**

I worked on the paper work for two straight hours until Alice came up and told me to take a shower that the food was almost done. I walk out of the shower to see my clothes already laid out for me. I roll my eyes. Alice is such a fashionista, its weird… but in an adorable way.

I grab a pair of matching lacy underwear and slip that on before putting on my black jeans, and red button down long sleeved shirt. Ha! She even got me a tie, good thing I know how to tie these things. I slip on some dress shoes I normally wear for meetings and what not and put some moose on my hair and let it dry in a cool straight due, a bit of makeup and I'm done.

After I am perfectly presentable and I smell like my favorite vanilla perfume I walk downstairs. I see that the lights downstairs are dim. I smile to myself a bit before I stop at the base of the stairs, where am I even supposed to go?

I see in the dim light a trail of petals, I scooch down to see that they are rose petals, when the hell did she have time to get roses? Did I really work for two hours or did I work for more? Shit I hope I am not in the dog house.

I fallow the trail of petals to see that it leads to the downstairs small library. I knock on the old style door "Alice?" I ask. I hear a click "In here." She says. I shrug and reach for the door knob but… it's locked. "Um, the door is locked." I say.

"That is because you are supposed to close your eyes." Alice says from behind the door. I sigh and close my eyes "Done." I say my eyes still closed. I hear the door open and I feel Alice's soft hand on my face. "Take one step back." She says. I frown but do as I am told.

I hear the door close and Alice's hand cups my neck and cheek. "Can I open my eyes now?" I ask. I feel Alice's thumb brush against my jaw "Yes, you can." She says and I open my eyes slowly. My eyes automatically meet Alice's bright hazel eyes. I smile at her "I hope I didn't keep you waiting long." I say as I wrap my arms around her perfect waist, the soft material to her dress brushing my skin.

Alice smiles softly and bite's one plump perfect red lip "Not at all." She says softly. I nod, the smile still in place as I lean forward "Good to know." I say softly before I brush my lips against hers. I lift one hand to her cheek as I kiss her softly before we pull away, Alice's eyes shining like melted brass.

I straighten up and take a step back as a low whistle escapes my lips as I lift a hand up and twirl Alice. She is wearing a black dress with red trimmings finishing the bottom and red heels. Her hair is smoothed down in a very neat and sexy fashion. She is wearing a silver necklace with a small heart on it and she just looks amazing. Her heel's push her to around an inch shorter than me if not the same height.

"You look incredible." I say as I take a small step forward. Alice ducks her head a small blush coloring her cheeks "Thank you. You look amazing yourself." She says. I smile down at her, she is just too adorable. "Why thank you, I had the privilege of getting my clothes picked out for me." I say and Alice smiles a bit. "Did you like the clothes?" she asks me.

I nod "Of course, you know what I like." I say with a small smile tugging at my lips. Alice rolls her eyes "Are you ready for our date?" she asks. I nod and bring her fingers to my mouth to kiss them. "Of course, lead the way." I say and she smiles and she stands in front of me as she opens the two old style doors that lead to the library.

The first thing I notice is candles. They are everywhere and they light the way to our table and they circle around the room. The glass wall making a perfect effect of romance and outdoors while we still have the warmth of the indoors. I see that the circular table I used to use to tutor Alice is in the center of the wide space with a white cloth over it with our plates, cups and the food in the middle. I look at Alice to see her biting her lip nervous.

"Do you like it?" she asks. I smile "Like it? I love it. It's beautiful. Thank you Alice." I say and she smiles so brightly I can see her dimples. "It looks amazing." I say looking back at the room. She holds my hand and pulls me forward as soon as we reach the table I pull the chair for Alice and she sits down.

I notice a bottle of wine. "Whine?" I ask her as I grab it from the table. Alice nods and I start twisting the wire and grab the bottle opener. I twist it in the cork and it pops out. I grin as I pour the whine on Alice's cup and in mine. I place it there and I take my seat across from Alice.

I look at the table, the plates and the room looks so well decorated I am left speechless. I make eye contact with Alice and she smiles "Well, I maid spaghetti chicken alfredo. Your favorite. Spinach Salad, my favorite and for desert, that is a surprise and it's still in the kitchen." Alice says with a smile.

I nod and look at the food "It looks delicious, thank you." I say again taking her hand over the table. I squeeze her fingers and she smiles "Oh, I almost forgot the music." She says and grabs a small controller from her side and pushes play. Quickly the song "Goodbye's" by 3doors down start to play softly.

I grab the glass of wine and lift it up "To second chances?" I offer. Alice smiles "To our second chance." She says and we clink our glasses. I take a sip and so does Alice, I place the cup down and lick my lips. That's good wine, I look at the bottle and almost laugh. I really do spoil my own work, its V Whine.

I role my eyes and smile at Alice and she chuckles "I know how much you love your own brand." Is all she says. I squeeze Alice's delicate hand, "If you only knew how much I love you." I say to her looking at her eyes. Her eyes lift from the glass of wine to mine and they seem to smolder "So much that it scares you out of your wits but it makes you feel strong all at once?" she asks.

I feel my lips tug up a bit "Something like that." I nod at her and Alice leans forward and winks "Dig in my fickle Romeo." She says. "As you wish my everlasting Juliet." I retort and fallowing her orders I take a bite of the food on my plate and moan, so good. I lick my lips "This is amazing." I say and Alice beams.

"Thank you, it's good to know my hard work was worth it." she says. "Everything you do is worth it." I say and take another sip of the whine. Alice digs in as well and we speak about music, food, places she would like to see, where she wants to study, stuff like that. We are slowly falling back in to our groove… or a better one.

We finish the pasta and salad and Alice stands, I stand up to help her take the plates back but she just shakes her head and tells me to sit down. I sigh but do as I am told as she grabs the plates and walks out of the room. I smile to myself, what a perfect night. I feel my heart beat strong and hard against my chest in peace and harmony. I feel my phone buzz in my jacket pocket and I slide it out.

Jenks. I look to the door and flip it open "This better be good, Jenks." I warn quickly as I stand and walk to the corner so that if Alice enters she doesn't see me on the phone. "It is, I got word from that woman Clara." He says. I clench my jaw "I don't want to hear it Jenks." I say. He pauses "It's important." He states. "I'm having a nice dinner with Alice, can't you just inform me in the morning?" I ask.

There is silence and I hear Alice's hells clicking against the hardwood. "I need to tell Alice about the letter, we are kinda back together. Bye, Jenks. Call me early tomorrow." I say and hang up and slide the phone in my pocket as I walk back to the table just in time to see Alice walk in.

I smile at her, though it is a bit forced. I see that the dish is a bit heavy and walk forward and grab it from Alice. "I can carry it." I say as I walk to the table and place it gently. Alice smiles and her hand that rest on my arm slides down to my wrist "Why thank you my strong girlfriend." She says.

I grin a bit and try to ignore the flush of heat that runs through my veins. To tell you the truth, Alice looks freaking sexy in that dress. But in this second I have imagined three different scenarios where I take it off.

I take a deep breath "Anytime love." I say and Alice kisses my lips chastely. Or she wanted it to be quick but I hold her waist to me and kiss her slowly. I feel Alice relax and her hands come up to lock behind my shoulder as I hold her to me and we kiss for a long moment.

Soon we break away in need of stupid air. I gasp a breath as I lay my forehead on hers, our breaths crashing against each other's faces as our eyes connect in silent conversation. "I must admit I have wanted to do that all night." I say before I lean forward and touch my lips to hers, once, twice, three times, four. Before I kiss her cheek and pull back. I pull her chair out for her and she sits and I move my chair so that its next to hers and sit down.

She smiles at the small change I made. "A table is to far of a distance." I admit with a small smile. Alice's eyes melt back to that burning bronze before she leans forward and kisses my lips "you are so perfect, it hurts to face." She says against my lips. I hold back a chuckle "I am everything but perfect, Alice." I say. "Perfectly in perfect, then." She says.

I smile and kiss her cheek "As you wish." I mumble not wanting to push her buttons. She smiles at me before she reaches forward and un lids our surprise. My mouth waters as soon as I see it. Chocolate muse.

"You maid this?" I ask in shock. Alice grins "I may have called up mom and asked her how to make it, I hope it's good." She says. I smile and lean forward and grab a spoon and take a spoon full and pop it in my mouth. I moan, my head tilting back and everything. "Thish ish shoooo good." I say around my mouth full.

Alice giggles next to me "Glad you like it." she says before she brings the bowl closer to us on the table and I take another spoon full. Shit, this taste amazing. The flavor is dancing in my mouth. I lick my lips from the sweet chocolate and take another spoon but instead of eating it I place it in front of Alice's lips, "Open." I say and she does.

I feed the spoonful to Alice and watch in fascination as her red plum lips close around the spoon and as I pull the spoon out she moans softly. The sight metaphorically goes straight to my dick, sorry for the romance killer.

I take a spoonful and eat it and I see that Alice cups my cheek and leans forward. She licks my lips and pulls back "You had something on your lip, don't worry I got it." she says with a wink.

I clear my thought and shake my head softly before I take a spoonful and feed Alice. Practically how it goes. I feed Alice, I feed myself, I feed Alice, Alice feeds me, and so on until there is nothing left of our desert. Alice takes the last spoonful but as I place the spoon on the empty dish she tilts my head to hers and kisses me, she licks my lips and I open and as soon as I do, I feel the chocolate muse pass from her lips to mine as Alice continues to kiss me I swallow it and pull her closer to me. as I kiss her deeply. Her mouth tasting like the sweet chocolate we just ate.

I moan softly in to her mouth when I feel her hand on my thigh but I pull back, no. not yet. I want this to be a romantic night. That can wait till later. I pull back and stand, Alice frowns but smiles when I hold my hand out for her and bow "Care to dance?" I ask. She smiles "It would be my pleasure." She says. I grin and she stands, I walk to the iPod on the radio in the corner and put on my dance playlist.

Call me odd, but I have slow songs on my dance playlist. I just love olds slow songs. The song "Love will find a way" yes the one from freaking lion king 2. What! It's a good song! And it pretty much fits the occasion.

Alice laughs softly "You and those freaking lions." She muses. I chuckle "Me and freaking Disney." I mumble as we sway in our own soft little circle. "Love, Love will find a way." I sing softly to Alice's ear. Her head is tucked on my shoulder and chin. "If you are there to guide me." I sing and continue to sing until the song is done.

Alice lifts her head "You would think your girlfriend knowing a Disney song would be a turn off." She says softly brushing some hair from my forehead with the tip of her fingers. "Is it?" I ask my eyes staring at hers as I feel my lips twitch. She shakes her head "Oddly no, I should get my brain checked out." She mumbles. I smirk softly and nod "Yeah… you should." I finish in a whisper as I kiss her softly.

Alice's hands knot in my hair as she pulls me closer to her. I duck a bit more to get better access to her sweet lips, I love you Alice. I love you, I love you, I love you. It's the only thought running threw my head as we kiss. We kiss for a hole song just standing there kissing until a song catches my ear. I break the kiss "Do you know how to waltz?" I ask Alice as I lick my lips.

She shakes her head "No…I don't think I do." She says. I smile and pull her to me, "This is a Spanish song, but I love it." I say and I start to sway in long steps to the sides in a circle. One to the left one to the right, turn. One to the left one to the right and turn. One to the left and one to the right, finish circle.

**(recommend you look for it, it's by the artist 'Chayanne- tiempo de vals' just so you get a feel of the song Bella is dancing and singing to Alice. Oh, you should also look for 'love will find a way' and re read that part :P)**

_Tiempo de vals es el tiempo hacia atras  
donde hascer lo de siempre es volver a empezar  
donde el mundo se para y te observa girar  
es tiempo para amar_

Tiempo de vals tiempo pare sentir  
y decir sin hablar y escuchar sin oir  
un silencio que rompe en el aire un violin  
es tiempo de vivir

I take a deep breath as we fall in tune with the song, I am so singing this song even if she doesn't understand what the song says. I lick my lips and whisper in her ear the lyrics of the song.

_"Besame en tiempo de vals  
un dos tres un dos tres  
sin parar de bailar  
haz que este tiempo de vals  
un dos tres un dos tres  
no termine jamas"_

"Tiempo de vals tiempo para viajar  
por encima del sol por debajo del mar  
sin saber si te llevo o me dejo llevar  
no es tiempo de verdad"

"Tiempo de vals tiempo para abrazar  
la pasion que prefieres y hacerla girar  
y elevarse violenta como un huracan  
es tiempo en espiral"

"_Besame en tiempo de vals_

_Tiempo de vals que empleamos los dos  
dibujando en el suelo de un viejo salon  
con tres pasos de baile una historia de amor  
es tiempo y es en fin  
mi tiempo para ti."_

I finish singing the song and I feel Alice kiss my though "What's the song mean? Something about kissing?" she asks. I chuckle "Of course you understood that word. He is saying:

"Time of waltz, going back in time. When doing what you always do, is starting again. where the world stops and watches you spin. It's time to love." I mumble and kiss the top of her head and continue telling her the lyrics.

"Time of waltz, time to feel. And tell without talking, hearing without listening. A silence that breaks with the wind of a violin, it's time to live."

"Kiss me in time of waltz, one two three, one two three, don't stop dancing. make that this time of waltz one two three, one two three never ends.

"Time of Waltz time going back, over the sun, under the sea without knowing if I take you or if I let myself get taken away. It's not real time."

" Time of waltz time to hug, the passion that you prefer make it dance and rise violently like a hurricane it's a time turning around."

"Kiss me in time of waltz, time of waltz that we both make live. Drawing in the ground of an old ball room. With three steps of dance a story of love, its time and its end. My time for you." I say to her.

I lick my lips "I personally love the song in Spanish, it sounds more romantic." I mumble and Alice looks up at me her eyes shining with a hidden passion. The question is… why is it hidden? "I love you so much, Bella." She says. I smile "Love is such a week word to place to the way I feel about you.." I say as I trace my thump on her cheek.

She smiles softly and leans in to my touch "I don't think there will ever be a word that expresses how much I feel for you." she says. I kiss her cheek, "We know how we feel about one another, I think that's the only thing we can trust in this world." I say. My whole body wants to just hug her, kiss her.

_Ask her again, you know you want to. _My brain shouts. I clench my jaw as my hand suddenly stops on Alice's hip. What? I ask myself. W-what was that?... I shake my head against Alice's, what is wrong with me? we just got back together and already I want her to be official with me again? No, I won't ask her. Not yet, though this time… we would need to hide the ring.

I shake my head metaphorically speaking and zero in my thoughts on Alice. "I love you." I mumble against her forehead. Alice lifts her head up "I love you too." She says before we connect our lips. We kiss with a soft passion, a burning fire that starts in my veins and runs through my whole body.

Alice breaks the kiss "Why don't we move this to our room?" she asks and I feel my thought dry but I nod soundlessly before I stop. "You cooked, why don't I just put the dishes in the dish washer and I'll meet you upstairs?" I ask.

Alice nods and with a quick kiss to my lips I watch her walk out of the room while I gather the dishes. After I have all the dishes I turn of the radio and walk to the kitchen. I rinse off the plates and pants and put everything in the dish washer quickly. After that is done and I wash my hands I run a hand threw my hair.

What is this knot I feel in my gut? I take a shaky breath and rinse my face with water and dry it with a dry cloth. I lean against the counter, when did I get this feeling? Its… it's something I know I have felt before… I just can't put my finger on when…

I shake my head "What am I doing? Alice is upstairs." I mumble shaking my head as I turn the dishwasher on and walk out of the kitchen turning everything off. I walk back to the library and turn off all the candles and make sure everything is locked and turn on my security system. I walk back up the stairs and get to my room and laugh a bit when I see a few candles on and Alice lying down on the bed playing with some satin ribbons on her night gown.

"You have really gone all out my little pixie." I say as I take off the jacket and throw it on the ground as I tug at my tie. Alice leans up on her elbows and tilts her head "I'm nothing if not thorough." Alice says. I smirk a bit as I unbutton my shirt forgetting about the fucking tie as I step out of my shoes. Alice kneels on the bed just as I reach it and pushes the shirt of my shoulders. I let if fall on the ground and she tugs at the tie pulling me closer.

"What a shame you took that dress of without me, I really wanted to take it off. I was dreaming about it all evening." I say softly to her. She smirks at me "Well, who doesn't like a present you can just un wrap again?" she asks. I place a hand on her hip and let it trail down until I am cupping her but. I squeeze softly at her skin as I lean in for the kiss.

"Let's just see what this gift has to offer no?" I ask and she bites at my lip "I love when you speak Spanish." She says and I raise an eyebrow "Really?" I ask and she nods as she tugs at my belt "I love any language you can speak." She says as she pops the button of my pants. I smile at her and kiss her lips as I feel her hand dip in to my underwear and cup me.

I moan softly and trail my lips to her ear "Besame." I state and Alice looks at me before her eyes stare at my lips before she kisses me. I kiss her back before breaking the kiss "Te voy aser el amor toda la noche asta que veas las estrellas y salga el sol." I whisper in her ear.

She puts pressure on her hand that is cupping me and I moan softly "What does that mean?" she asks. I hold back a smirk and run a hand over her body cupping her breast softly before cupping her crotch. "I said, I am going to make love to you all night until you see stars and the sun comes up." I whisper as I rub her clit over the material.

My mind only understanding the moan that leaves Alice's lips as i do so, this is going to be a long and good night...

**A/N: sex scene most of next chapter! Hahah, I wonder… it is going to be chapter 69…. Maybe I'll throw something about that? Hmmm… haven't decided :P**


	69. Chapter 69

**A/N: Here it is, the next chap. I know I am such a tease! xD lol. I am warning you guys starting now I may not update this week because I am taking my SAT's and I really need to freaking study! I haven't done shit and I am so nervous! Like I am freaking out! xD Half and half, I still have no idea what the hell I am going to do with my fucked up life. I want to be a writer but I need something 'practical' first. :P boo! But eh, needed. **

**I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT**

**Ch.69 ;) **

**Bpov (jump to the next bold line! If ya want to be safe!) **

I pin Alice against the bed as I lay over her, "Take of your pants." Alice breathe and I role off her and yank down my pants and underwear. I quickly take off my bra and turn to look at Alice as she straddles me.

My abdomen clenches as I look at the red lace of her satin nightgown. I repress a shudder at the feeling of her heated pussy on my abdomen, I lean forward kissing her. Our kiss sloppy and wild as we try to get our clothes off quick enough. I fumble with her damn lace until I actually think I tear it. Wait? It wasn't supposed to make that ripping sound? oh, well. I'll buy her five.

I throw it over the edge of the bed and look up at a smirking Alice. "You destroyed the pour thing." She says. I smirk as I cup her breast in my hands and tweak her nipples until they pebble, "I'll buy you five if it makes you feel better." I say and Alice moans.

She grinds on me and god, it feels so good. Her heat against my own really is fucking amazing. I groan softly as I thrust against her and she moans "Fuck, Bella.." she breathes as I push against her again, I take a deep breath "Alice." I breathe as I lie down and scoot back dragging Alice with me to the center of the bed.

I lift on of her legs over my hip, "Alice put your other leg between mine." I say and she shifts. I move my hand to her hip as I start moving it in a circle form as we moan in sync. I start to thrust up as Alice circles in the perfect torturous felling that is scissoring. "Slower, make it last." I say as I try to fight the urge to thrust wildly at her. I try to keep a good rhythm.

"Oh… Bellaaaa… god baby you feel so good." Alice moans softly. "Ugh, just like that Alice…. Ohh, just like that…. God…. So good." I moan as she grinds on me our clits brushing against each other. It's a looooooong build up, cherishing the feeling of our body's together moving so well. To tell you the truth I'm holding back on cumming so that the orgasm hits even more effectively "Shit…. ungh…." We moan together as I start to thrust faster, the flame already burning in my abs and abdomen.

I run a hand up Alice's leg as I start to thrust faster and faster as Alice starts to grind harder and faster. "Shit, I am so close baby…. You feel so good." I say feeling my strength loosen on holding back the orgasm. "Ungh… wait for me, fuck…. Ugh…. I'm close… wait baby, wait for me." Alice moans and groans as she grinds on my core. "Fuck… hurry up baby." I thrust harder and pull her closer to me. "Faster." I grunt as I start to grind harder on her. "Ooohhhh." Alice moan/yells.

I feel the sweet fall down my neck and my abs burn with such a good pain. I whimper "Please Alice.." I manage to get out. "I'm right there…. Shit…. I'm so close…" she pants. I slide my hand over to her crotch and place my fingers on her clit before I start rubbing in circles frantically.

How the fuck is she still not there? I was there three minutes ago!. "Fuck… Alice… what is it…. wha-at's keeping you." I state rather then ask in pants. She thrusts against my fingers and center. "I… I… I… ungh…. Can't let go.." she states and I almost snort but keep it in as I try to concentrate in the feeling of arousal in my body. I shift my hand so that it's against her sweet, wet pussy and slide two fingers in to her as I thrust in to her.

"Let go for me baby, let go." I moan out and as soon as I feel her clench around me and spasm I let go. Our body's spasm and rock together as we cum together in an orgasm so intense it takes my breath away. I feel my fingers get coated in Alice's cum and I hold back my own moan at the feeling of my fingers getting even slicker. I lay Alice over my body and hug her to me as she ride's the afterglow as we catch our breath.

"I love you." I mumble feeling the sweet trickle down my scalp. I slowly retract my fingers from inside of her and lick them clean, fuck she taste so good. I feel the light sheen of sweet on Alice's back but don't care as I pull her closer to me as I manage to get my breath under control. I feel Alice's hand caress my stomach softly tracing invisible patterns on it. "I love you." she says softly as she kisses my shoulder.

I shift so that I can kiss her and Alice straddles my lap as we kiss. Her hand automatically goes to my stomach and starts to trail up and down teasing as I do the same with her back. Tracing her vertebrae up and down as we kiss. The feeling of her breast on mine stirring the hunger down under. Ha! I am totally keeping that.

Alice starts everything by thrusting against my hips as she moans softly in to my mouth. I flip us around so that I am over her as we kiss as I let my hand trail down to her center and she cups my breast. "Will I… ever stop….c raving you so much?" she asks against my lips. I smirk against the kiss "I sure hope not, amor mio." I state and Alice shudders.

I smirk, it's good to know me speaking another language turns her on. "Voglio mangiarefuorie ti fannourlare il mio nome." I whisper as I trace my lips across her jaw. "God, what are you saying?" she asks in a breathy grunt. I smirk "What do you think I said?" I ask. "I don't know, you make everything you say sound like a dirty velvet secret." She gasps when I nip at her ear.

God, I really do love biting. "I want to eat you out and make you scream my name…" I lick my lips when I hear Alice moan softly and push against my hips, I close my eyes at the feeling "I think it's my mission in life." I mumble before I duck my head and bite her shoulder. Alice gasps and knots a hand in my hair "Fuck… you have such a dirty mouth, it makes me so hot for you. Oh, fuck…. Shit, I love It when you bite." She gasps. And she shifts so that I am laying again and she is in between my legs.

I smirk, I like this. Alice likes almost everything I do. "I love when you curse." I whisper to her skin. "I love hearing the effect have on you… I love feeling you get wet for me, I love when you come around my fingers and I love when you scratch me." I moan softly as she digs her nails on my back.

"Masochist, my knotty girl. Umgh… such a fucking tease." She growls in my ear teasingly as her hand runs down and runs a finger threw my wet folds. "God, you're so wet for me, you're so ready for me." she purrs as she nips at my neck. I arch my back in to Alice and she kisses the swell of my breast. "Why don't you sit back and let me make you scream my name." she teases over my nipple.

I go to retort but she nips my nipple with her teeth making me thrust against her hand. Her lips twitch before she lets go and smooth's the burn with her tongue. I gasp as she starts to trail down my body with open mouth kisses before she settles in-between my legs and starts to kiss, nibble and lick at my folds.

I knot a hand in the sheets and the other is placed on Alice's head as I try to lead her to where I want her. And as soon as Alice has her tongue on me, there is only one thing left two do, moan.

I feel her start to lick and the only thing I can do is shut my eyes and let my head back and relax as I let the feeling of her lips on my lower ones run threw my body. I moan lowly in my thought, the only noise in the room is Alice's panting and soft moans along with my louder ones. I bite my lip, fuck I want to taste her. I want her to feel the same way along with me.

I move my hand so that it's cupping Alice's cheek and I lift her up and off of me, letting go my own quiet whimper. Alice frowns as she looks at me as she wipes her lips. I hold back a small grin as I lean forward "What's wrong baby?" Alice asks. I kiss her "I want to try something with you." I mumble.

She frowns "I am not tying you up and playing with that freaky wax candle." She states. I pause… what the fuck? I roar with laughter, I forgot I had a sex wax candle. Hmm… another day. I bite my lip "No, Alice. Nothing to do with a candle. I want to go down on you…" I trail off as I kiss at her jaw.

Alice's breathing grows a bit more "Couldn't that wait until I finished on you?" she asks as she gulps, I know so because my lips are at her thought when she does so. I smirk "I wasn't finished, I want to go down on you… while you go down on me." I whisper in her ear. Alice shudders, "W-what?" she asks and I smile against her neck as I nibble at it. "You already herd me." I tease as I lick at a spot on her neck. Alice twitches as she lets out a gasp, "How does that… even work?" she asks.

I chuckle softly and rest my head on Alice's shoulder. "My sweet girl, I am corrupting you." I muse more to myself then to her. "Get on your knees, over my head and then you just relax and enjoy it." I say with a small chuckle. Alice stops and I role my eyes as I lay down and I start moving her hips and legs until we are in the position.

I run a hand over her but "We don't have to do it if you are uncomfortable." I say as I place kisses on her inner thighs. I hear Alice's soft moan but she says nothing and just leans down, I feel her hot breath fan across my center. My eyes flutter and I kiss at her lower lips, I start licking and sucking and I feel Alice start to do the same.

The only sound in the whole room is our moans and our gasps, shit, this feels even better than it did with other people. I move my hands over her skin as I feel Alice's hands on my abs move to cup my breast. I moan loudly making Alice moan with the vibrations.

I lick and suck and nibble at her juices. And I feel Alice do the same to me. And soon I feel it, I feel Alice on the edge of cumming. I feel her pulse against my lips and that's spurs me on to go at the edge as well. I tap her back letting her know its ok to let go and I nibble at her clit and she spasms over me. her loud moan against my clit spurring on my orgasm.

**FINALY YOU CAN ALL READ SAFELY! xD**

I shake and quake and I feel Alice do the same. After our intense orgasms Alice roles off of me and she straightens and snuggles at my side. I feel her breathing even out and I know, she is exhausted. I take a deep breath myself and try to relax and after my breathing is calmer I snuggle my head in Alice's neck.

"I love you." we sigh at the same time and laugh softly. I grab the blanket and throw it over us as we lay down so that we are facing each other. I rub nose with Alice's "Go to sleep, beautiful." I say softly. Alice's eyes flutter "Fine… good night, Bella." She mumbles and we fall asleep in a deep comfortable embrace.

**Apov**

Sometimes, dreams are so much better than life. But, what happens when life is better than your dreams? Right now, my life is better than my own dreams. Why dream when my reality is so incredibly better.

I wake up to the sound of a phone ringing. "_Bella, its Jenks. You pick up the phone I don't care who is next to you on that bed."_ Says the ring tone. I try to hold back a laugh as I feel Bella groan and jump of the bed. She scramble's sleepily until she finds her jacket from last night.

"What?" she whispers at him… "Yeah, I know I told you to call. I just didn't mean at fucking seven am!" she whispers…. "Because Alice is still asleep and I don't want to wake her." She says softly as I hear her walk over to the balcony and open the glass door "Yes, we had a great night." She says and I can practically hear the grin on her face.

I role my eyes and dig my head in the pillow. I try to ignore her call and give her as much privacy as I can.

**Bpov **

"Yes, we had a great night." I say with a grin. Jenks chuckles "Good, I'm glad you are back together. I hope you learn your lesson and stop fucking up." He says and I role my eyes. "Sure, now what was it you wanted to call me about?" I ask.

"Clara Valentine." He says. Automatically I feel my good mood vanish and a dark anger take hold of me. "What about her?" I ask my tone dark. I look down at myself and see that I am naked, and it's fucking cold. I walk back in to the room "She's asking if you would consider a meeting with her." He says.

I drop the phone on the dresser and push speaker. "Why does she want to meet with me? Haven't I given the bitch enough?" I ask as I throw a shirt over my head and I slide on some girl briefs and pajama bottoms. "She wants to talk about you maybe considering meeting Renesmee. She has wanted to meet you her whole life." He says. I run a hand threw my hair as I grab the phone from the dresser and put it back to my ear.

"Why the hell would she want to meet me?" I ask lower, Alice is still asleep. "Well, I am assuming she has this huge question about her elder sister who she has never met." She says. I frown and run a hand threw my hair "I… she's better off without meeting me. What is she going to see? a girl more bitter then her own father? No, she can stay with the mystery. And Clara can choke on a dick for all I care." I growl as I walk to the bathroom and brush my teeth quickly wile Jenks tells me why I should consider it.

I spit in the sink "She's the proof I need to just slander my father's name, Jenks! The press will be up my ass and the whole war hero thing he was trying to pull off will crash down. Do you have any idea how that can affect our market? No one wants to buy things from a war hero who cheated on his wife, the press will eat this shit and we will go down." I say to him.

I hear his sigh "I just don't think it's fair to push her out of your life like she was pushed out of her fathers." He states. I pause "My father was a drunk, workaholic, cold, depressed and angry man. Trust me, she is better off without having to know that from him. Clara? Yeah, she's the one that made him that way!" I say with a growl. "Besides! How the hell do I know it's actually true and that Clara bitch didn't just fake that it was my dad's kid." I saw lower.

He sighs and I hear the clicks of his pen against his desk. "Fine, I will tell her that you're not interested. Goodbye, Bella." He says. I nod and he hangs up and I splash some water over my face. I run a hand threw my hair as I shake my head to clear it. "Bella?" I hear Alice ask from behind me. I turn to see her a few steps behind me with a small frown on her lips.

"What's a matter?" she asks. I sigh, I really need to tell her. "Alice, there are some things I figured out while we were broken up that I think you should know." I say and Alice nods and I lead her to the room and sit down on the bed. I run a hand threw my hair "Um… you remember that letter my dad wrote to me?" I ask.

Alice nods and I sigh "I read it." I say and Alice nods again "What did it say?" she asks. I scratch my eyebrow "Um… I… I have a sister." I say and I see Alice's eyes scrunch up and then her face goes blank "Oh my God, that's… um… wow." She says. I role my eyes and stand up from the bed and grab a cig and light up "Yeah, wow." I say with an eye role as I take a drag.

"Um, I mean. Isn't it a good thing that you have a big sister?" she asks. I stop and frown as I blow smoke out of my mouth "Alice… she's not older them me." I say shaking my head. Alice frowns before her eyes go wide "You dad cheated on your mom?" she asks. I smirk and gasp out a bitter laugh "Wonderful, I have a bastard sister." I laugh bitterly. "Bella! That's a horrible thing to say." Alice says.

I stare at her, "What do you… you know what. No, I am not arguing with you about that brat. For all I know it can be a lie and she may not even be blood related to me. So, no. I am not arguing with you." I say as I take a long drag and walk to the balcony. I hear a small huff from Alice "Are you going to contact her?" she asks.

I laugh as I look down at the woods "Nope, I have no interest in family. Nor do I have any interest in meeting Clara." I say with a bitter laced tone. "Who's Clara? Your sister?" she asks. I shake my head "Clara is the bitch and Renesmee the pup." I say.

Alice whacks the back of my head "Don't talk about little kids like that." She says. I role my eyes "the brat is eleven years old. She was born when I was ate, my mom died when I was ten. Two years, two years my father lied to my mother and the countless years after my mom he lied to me. God only knows if I don't have a bunch of kids running around somewhere." I say with a laugh.

"Wouldn't it be funny?" I ask in fake joy. Alice glares "I know you're mad, but don't take it out on me." she warns. I throw the cig over the railing, I am hungry. Are you hungry? I am starving. I'm going to go cook something for us." I say as I walk away from Alice and down to the first floor.

I cook the waffles I had made in the waffle maker and I place it on plates and Alice show's up minutes later her hair whet with water. She took a shower. I push her plate to her as I start eating mine. "Bella." She says and I look up as I take a bite of waffle "yeah?" I ask. "You do know, siblings aren't that bad. Maybe you should meet her." Alice says. I sigh "Please, Alice. If you care at all for what is left of my sanity. I can't, I literally cant, it's bad enough knowing the truth that my father was not the man I knew him as." I say.

Alice stares at me for a long moment, "Don't blame her for your fathers mistake." Alice says and I feel that I lose my appetite. I throw the napkin on the plate and stand and put the place on the counter, I walk out of the kitchen and I hear Alice curse. "Stop fucking running away from me. I'm just trying to talk, to you." Alice says. I stop at the threshold my hands fisted and I can feel that my breathing is getting deeper as the anger settles in.

"What Alice? I am jus trying to avoid a fight." I say my voice sounding exhausted. She sighs "Why are you so angry at Renesmee? What did she do to you? If anything she is just as innocent as you are. Your dad and her mom are at fault, not her and not you." she says.

"Ok, and what will I say. 'Oh, hey. I'm you big sister Bella. I'm sorry I abandoned you your whole life I didn't know my dick head dad and your slut of a mom fucked and had you. I apologize, now do you want to know the history of beer and learn how to drink?' NO! I am not meeting the kid! She is probably better off just thinking I don't know she exists." I state as I go to turn.

"What if she needs you?" Alice asks. I stop and frown "Why would she need me?" I ask. She shrugs "What if her mom is abusive?, what if she is bullied in school?, what if all she wants is a big sister that will protect her and love her?" Alice asks. I frown "You cope." I say and Alice shakes her head sadly.

"Bella, I know you have no idea how sibling bonds work. But as soon as you know that you have one out there… the urge to get to know them to see if they like you, if they like the same things as you… it's almost un bearable. It's a strong bond… and I know getting tied down with things to worry about scare you but… what if she needs you so that she doesn't end up like the old you?" she asks.

I feel something in me crumble and I want to be angry but I can't feel it. I close my eyes and sigh sadly "Why are you doing this to me?" I ask sadly. I swallow down the lump in my thought as I feel a tear slide down the corner of my eye. "Because I know that somewhere hidden in that anger you have inside, you have an urge to have a family. You know you do, everyone does. It's a human trait." Alice says as she touches my shoulder.

I clench my jaw "I have some work I need to get done, if you want we can go out for lunch after I'm done with it." I say softly, still I don't open my eyes. "Ok." I hear Alice says softly and after I open my eyes and kiss the top of her head I walk up the stairs to my office. I flip my phone on "Jenks, arrange the God damn meeting." I say. He laughs "Who should I thank for this?" he asks. I sigh "Alice, it's always Alice." I say and after that we speak work for hours.

**A/N: here it is. again, I don't know where I am going with this. Oh, again I may not update for a looong time cuz this week I have my SAT's! and I need to study! Wish me luck! **

Sorry for some of the errors i didnt have time to read it over!


	70. Chapter 70

A/N: Here it is! Hope you guys like it.

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!

Ch.70

Bpov

I feel my fingers twitch against the steering weal again as I shift to get conferrable. "Will you relax, you look like your about to slam the breaks." Alice speaks next to me. I look at her by the corner of my eye for a second "What? I'm relaxed, why wouldn't I be relaxed? Do you know something I don't?" I ask suspiciously as I chanceF a glance at her. I hear Alice's soft laugh "Will you calm down, no. I don't know anything other than what you have told me." she says and I feel myself relax a bit.

I nod and run my free hand threw my hair "Your right, your right. I'm sorry; I'm just… on edge." I say as I stretch my hand out and I feel Alice's small one slide in to mine. I thread our fingers and give her a soft squeeze; I bring her hand to my lips "Thank you for coming with me." I mumble against her knuckles before I place her hand on the gear shift so that we can hold hands while I shift the car.

"Of course I would come if you asked me. You need me and besides, who is going to keep you from turning around." She says and I smile at her as I survey the empty highway. "Don't you think it's a bit creepy that this highway is completely empty though?" I ask Alice.

She chuckles "I do, but I don't think Clara has anything to do with the cars going on the road." Alice muses. I pout "Fine, suck the fun out of everything." I tease as I take a turn. I feel Alice lean over to me and kiss my cheek, jaw and nip at my under jaw. "But the only sucking I do is in the bedroom." She says and her free hand runs over my chest before going down and cupping me.

I take a deep breath "Alice… I'm driving." I say licking my lips. Alice chuckles softly and retracts her hand "At the hotel tonight then." She says and licks my jaw. I fight off a shudder as I feel it, but then she pulls away and I let the air out of my lungs "That's not nice Alice." I say with a pout. She pokes my cheek "Life ain't fair son." She says in her 'gangster' voice.

I laugh "Pfft, the only thing you have ever gotten closest to gangster is me and my drugs." I say with a laugh. Alice punches my arm playfully "You are ruining my rep! it's hard being this swag all the time." She says still in that stupid voice. I feel my shoulders shake but bite back a laugh "Honey, you're not swag. Do you even know what swag is?" I ask her.

She shifts in her seat, "I will bust a cap on ya white girl. No one comes to my land and disrespects me on my turf." She says in the same voice. I chuckle "You do know 'my land' and 'my turf' are exactly the same thing. And we aren't on your 'land' we are in my car, driving down for a meeting with my dad's mistress and my little sister." I say to her. Alice sighs "Can't a sister catch a break?" she asks and I reach my arm over her head and pat her head before I put my arm around her shoulder.

"You are such an odd girl, Alice. You are whiter than me; then again I do have a freaking awesome tan." I muse. Alice chuckles "Hey, I did my job. I distracted you until we got here." She says and I kiss the top of her head. "You did. Thank you." I say as I take the next turn and see a big hotel. I sigh as I park across the street.

"You actually think she's in there?" I ask. Alice nods "It would be her lost if she's not." Alice says. I turn of the car and get out walking around to get Alice's door. She smiles as she gets out "God, I missed that about you." Alice says as she hugs me. I frown "You missed me opening doors?" I ask. She shakes her head in my neck "Those small actions that show that you care." She says and I smile a bit to myself as I hug her.

I loosen the hug to connect our lips in a tender kiss as I let her lean against her hair; I place a knee in between her legs to balance myself out as we kiss slowly. I feel my muscles relax as I get lost in the kiss with Alice. Alice breaks the kiss and tilts her head up as I kiss her neck.

"B-Bella… weren't we supposed to go meet someone?" she asks. I hmm as I kiss her neck and lift up to kiss her lips "Two more minutes." I say against her lips as we kiss. Alice chuckles as she puts her arms around my shoulders and we kiss for two minutes more before she breaks the kiss leaning her forehead on mine. I try to catch my panting breath and so does Alice.

I flash her a smile and she stick's her tongue out. "Fuck off." She mumbles pushing my face away from her playfully. I laugh as I duck and wrap my arms around her waist as I lean my head on her shoulder "You are so moody." I mumble as we walk across the street like this. Sure we look odd, but hell if I care.

She chuckles blame it on PMS. She says. I click my tongue, "Sucks to be you. That is actually something I don't miss." I admit as I let her waist go to hold her hand. "Really? I couldn't imagine why you wouldn't miss that." She says sarcastically. I laugh softly and it dies as I'm at the entrance of the hotel.

I squeeze Alice's hand. "Let's do it." I say as I pull her with me. I immediately ask for Clare Valentine room. "Room 23B." the receptionist says. I smile to her "Thank you." I say politely as I start walking down the hall to the elevator. I push for the second floor and lean against the wall as Alice just looks at me.

I force a smile on my lips as I feel the dread and uncertainty knot in my gut. I feel Alice's hand on my cheek and I turn my eyes to look at her. She has a worried look on her face "If you're not ready for this we can plan another meeting." Alice says. I shake my head just as the doors open filling me with even more dread. "No, I'm good." I say and I walk with her to the room. Counting down until it's in front of me. I feel Alice pat my back but It does little to make me feel better, it's not taking away that uncomfortable feeling from me.

I nod twice and put my hands in my pants pocket as I wait. I should have smoked a cig. I should have taken a shot… or a sniff. I bite my lip but release it as soon as the door opens, my false bravado coming out. I feel my shoulders straighten and right when the door opens I see blue eyes, blond hair and tan skin.

I momentarily am thankful that I slid my sunglasses on in the elevator. That way she can't see the flare of anger that takes over me as soon as I see her. I feel my jaw clench as I look at her; she's around two inches shorter than me. Her face looks tired and wary of me. Good.

"You must be Clare?" Alice asks politely as she takes a step forward. Clare breaks her gaze from me and smiles tentatively at Alice. "Um, yes. That's me. Clare Valentine, and who are you?" she asks. Alice stretches her hand "Alice Cullen, Bella's close friend." She says and I look at her with a frown. "She meant to say my girlfriend." I say tensely as I put my arm over her shoulder and look at Clare.

She smiles softly "Of course, you should know I have no… reproach for the gay society." She says. I feel my lips twitch in to a smirk, not my real one. The one I use in school, the one that just yells superiority. "Of course, why would you?" I ask rhetorically and Clare smiles an uncomfortable smile and tucks a strand of her hair behind her ear.

I study her, she is... somewhat attractive. I can see why my father would find her appealing. I feel my smirk stay in place and I feel Alice elbow me lightly, I ignore it. "Can we come in?" I ask my smile almost teasing as I say the words. Clare nods "yes, of course. Sorry, please come in." She says and I feel Alice hold my hand as we make our way in.

She guides us to the living room and we sit down, I take off my sunglasses and I feel Alice rub my back as I look at Clare. "Where's the kid?" I ask. Clare shifts "She left to play with some friends. I told her to be back by now, so she will be joining us shortly." She says. I nod "Ok." I say with a nod my voice witch has always been low sounding almost scratchy.

I look around the apartment "Nice place." I say looking at the room. She smiles "Much better than the trailer home, I will give you that much." Clare says with a grin. I nod "Safer two. So… why did you move away from Phoenix?" I ask leaning back on the couch. Clare smile dies a bit "The memories were a bit much, I would have moved sooner but we didn't have any money." She says.

I nod "I'm sorry my father left you in such a rut." I apologize halfheartedly. But it's true; my father should have left her something. Not anything bit but something to maintain her child and herself. She nods twice "Thankfully you helped us out." She says and I shift in the couch and Alice speaks "You helped her out?" Alice asks. I nod "Yeah, we weren't together when this all went down." I mumble to her and she nods and pats my leg.

Just then the door opens "Mom! Did you see that sick car parked out front? If there not careful someone is going to steal it." says a voice from the doorway and I shift to look as a mini me walks in the door and drops a book bag on the corner before walking over and stopping when she sees me.

I stand up and slowly walk over to her, I'm taller than her. Hence the mini me, but… shit. I run a hand threw my hair as she stares me down and kinda at the same time we smirk at each other. "you're… you're you." she says. Her voice sends a pang to my heart; her voice is soft but edgy. Like it's about to get raspy like mine, she smokes. I can tell.

I grin at her "Last time I checked." I say with a nod. My hands go to my pockets as we look at each other. "So… Renesmee..." I trail off. She scratches the back of her neck "Its, Ness. Everyone calls me Ness." She says. I nod twice "Bella." I say and she frowns. "Really? the letter said Isabella." She says and I grin a bit at her "I'm not a fan of my full name." I say trying to hide the wince.

She nods "Understandable." She says and I nod and just then there are two flashes and we look to the side to see Alice and Clare with cameras. I frown "Alice, what are you doing?" I ask. She smiles "You guys are identical!" Alice says. I frown and look at her "No we're not." We say at the same time and then look at each other.

"You're really not helping the cause." We both say. I stop talking and she does the same. "That was freaky." I mumble and ness nods. "Yeah." She says. "Bella, look at her. She's like a little you!" she says and I stare at her "You checking out my sister?" I tease. Ness nudges me "Oh, where are my manners." She says and walks around me to Alice. "I'm Ness." She says with a grin.

I stare at her for a moment, THAT IS MY GRIN! I see Alice stare at me for a second before they shake hands. "And what is your name, gorgeous?" Ness asks. Didn't I already say her name? hmm... "Alice Cullen, I'm Bella's girlfriend." She says. I see Ness sigh "Of course, the beautiful ones are always taken." She says and I hold back a laugh as I walk over to Alice.

"Ness, why don't you and I get them some drinks?" Clare asks and Ness nods as she walks with her mom to the kitchen. I turn to Alice and her eyes are wide "She… she hit on me." Alice states. I hold back a laugh "Not only that, she has your… your grin and that burning thing you do with your eyes! Bella, I am freaking out." Alice says softly. I hold back a laugh. "I think we got that from Charlie." I mumble.

Alice shakes her head "And that gorgeous thing? I actually thought that for a second she was going to say beautiful." Alice mumbles. I laugh this time, softly and hide my head in Alice's neck as I do so. I pull her to me as I laugh, "This is so creepy." I mumble against her neck.

I feel Alice kiss my cheek and pull away just in time as Ness and Clare get there. I sit down and Alice sits next to me, Ness and Calare sit across from us. They hand us sodas and I nod in thank you. I take a sip of the soda and hold the cold glass in my hands. "So… what made you change your mind?" Clare asks. My head snaps up and I look between her and Ness.

"Excuse me?" I ask. Ness speaks "I think she means, what made you want to meet us. Mr. Jason Jenks told us that it wouldn't be possible at the moment and a few hours after he calls us up telling us you changed your mind." Ness says. I grimace a bit "Um, that. Er… that is all Alice." I say and Alice hits my arm "You wanted to, you were just busy with work. I just told you that work could wait another day and that meeting your little sister is something big." Alice sort of half lies covering me being a jerk.

I nod "Yeah. I don't know how this girl has the patience. I am a total workaholic." I mumble. Clare chuckles "So was your father." She says and I feel my smile slip away from my lips. I nod "Yes, but sadly work wasn't the only thing that kept him busy." I say with a hint of acid in my voice as I take a sip from the soda. I see Clare look at the floor for a moment and I see Ness shift in her seat.

"So, um Bella. Do you still play the piano?" Clare asks. I stop and look at her with a frown "How did you…" I trail off in question. "I saw you play once, in a school talent show. I was in the back obviously but you played your little heart out." She says. I feel my mood shift and this… hallow feeling run threw me.

"Well, I don't play anymore." I say and Clare frowns "Why?" she asks. "Personal reasons, mostly I don't have time for the useless task." I lie to her. Clare shakes her head "You should never quit something you had so much passion for." She says softly, like if she knew me. She doesn't know anything. "What? Is that your personal motto?" I ask. I feel Alice place a hand on my shoulder. "Bella." She says. I clench my jaw but its Ness that surprises me by laughing.

"Personal motto, hahaha, I like this chick. She's funny." Ness says. I frown "How old are you?" I ask. "Just turned thirteen." She says and I nod. "And you know the hole…" I trail off staring at Clare. Ness chuckles "That I'm the other woman's kid, yes. I know." She says. I stare at her for a second; I didn't think she was going to be so blunt about it.

"Ness, you know it wasn't like that." Clare says and I feel my lips twist in a humorless smile. Alice's hand runs down my back remembering me of her presence. I bit my lip and I check my watch, only half an hour and I'm itching to leave. Impossible.

"So, Ness… tell me about yourself. This thing is mostly about me meeting you." I say. Ness runs a hand threw her long curls "Well… I'm thirteen, I like rock music, I skateboard, I fallow you on twitter, I like to read… I draw, I have good grades and… that's pretty much it." she says with a shrug. I nod "Cool, ill fallow you back once I get home. Um… anything you want to know about me?" I ask shifting in my seat.

"Only everything." She says with an eye role. I chuckle "Well, I'm the owner of Volturi Beer, meaning I manage around… six beer plants and a vineyard in Italy. I own around… ten houses all in distinct places in the world. I'm starting my senior year in September, Alice is my girlfriend, I own that car you were talking about when you walked in, I like reading and music. I love ridding my motorcycle and that's pretty much it." I say with a shrug.

Ness grins "You are so cool." She states and I laugh and I hear Alice and Clare laugh along with me. "Oh, I'm not cool. I'm just a very busy and crazy person." I mumble wile I run a hand threw my hair. I feel a grin pull at my lips and allow it as I look at Ness from under the few flecks of hair that are over my forehead "You know, Alice draws two." I say and Ness looks at her with a grin. My grin, Charlie's grin. The Swan grin.

"Do you?" she asks tilting her head to the side and I hear Alice giggle and nod "I do, I mostly draw fashion though." Alice says. Ness grins and stands "Would you two like to see some of my sketches? There kind of silly but if you want..." she trails off and I stand "Sure, thing." I say and Ness starts walking to her room. I stand and say as an excuse to just get her alone for a second.

I lean against the doorframe as I look at her room. Organized yet it's still looks messy because she has so many books and stuff. Like maps and posters and what not. I chuckle and she looks at me "What you laughing at?" she asks. I scratch the back of my head "Nothing, it's just… shocking the family resemblance." I say as I walk in to her room with her. She stands tall and is actually just under my chin. "Yeah, it's like looking in to the future." She says and I laugh softly "oh, trust me. You don't want to be me when your older." I say as I walk to her bookshelf and grab one of her toy things.

I look at it "You like Anime's?" I ask pointing to the toy. She grins and nods "Yeah." She states and I nod and look around until I see something hidden behind a book. I reach for it and pull it out smirking. "I knew it." I say and turn to look at her "You're thirteen and you smoke already." I state rather then ask. She looks behind her "Put that back." She hisses. I look at the box and grimace a bit Winton's. Not my favorite brand.

"It's not healthy; your voice is changing already." I say and Ness frowns. "Isn't this the pot calling the kettle black?" She says. I chuckle "You're right. It is. I'm just telling you it's a bit early. But eh, you'll learn this stuff eventually." I say and throw the pack at her. She catches it and we hear footsteps walking over to us. She throws the pack back to me and I slide it in to my pocket.

"Ness, honey what's keeping you?" Clare asks. Ness puts on a smile "Nothing just getting to know Bella." She says. I chuckle and run a hand threw my hair "I'm sorry Clare, I'm afraid it's my fault, I was just asking her about common things." I say. I walk out of the room and Ness and Clare fallow I wink at Alice and kiss her cheek "Sorry if this is boring you." I mumble.

Alice smiles at me "Don't worry, I'm fine. But I could use a smoke." She says. I nod and smile at Alice "Um, Clare, Ness. Me and Alice will be right back, I'm just going to move my car and grab a smoke." I say and Clare nods "Go ahead, I'm going to check on dinner." She says.

I see Ness stare at me for a long minute and I send her a wink "Look up, chap. Because when I get back I am going to beat you at whatever video game you have." I say and Ness smirks my smirk. "Bring it." she says and I chuckle before me and Alice walk out of the apartment and walk down front. I get in my car with Alice and I drive it around before I park it closer to the hotel then it was and get out.

Alice sits on the trunk and I stand in between her legs and I pat my pocket. I take out the Winston's and I see Alice reach forward and look at the box "That isn't your brand." She says. I nod "I know." I say and flip the cardboard flap open and take out two cigs. I hand one to Alice and I pop it in my mouth before I light up hers then mine.

I grimace at the first few pulls but after it I get used to it. Alice blows out a gust of smoke "So, Ness smokes?" she asks. I chuckle and nod "Yeah, she does. I think I did the first thing to get on her shit list two." I say laughing as I take a drag. "What you do?" Alice asks.

"I told her it was a bit early at thirteen to smoke and that her voice was already changing. Then her mom was about to show up, I throw the box at her, she throws it back to me and I took it with me." I say and Alice pats my back "Awww, you did your first sisterly act." She coos.

I role my eyes and throw the cig on the ground. "I don't care; call me a priss but these cigs taste like crap to me." I say and Alice laughs and throws her on the ground two. "You just say that because your used to your brand. The nicotine buss is good." She says with a shrug and I nod and look at her lips.

"I think Ness has a thing for you." I say and I see Alice's lips pull up in a smile "Aw, isn't that adorable." She says and I lean forward but Alice leans back, I sigh and straighten and so does Alice.

I look at her eyes carefully "Why do you find it necessary to tease me?" I ask her. She chuckles, "Because I love when you pout." Alice says and I lean forward again and Alice leans back. I sigh "Fine, I won't kiss you." I say and straighten up. I stare at her eyes for a long moment and Alice puckers her lips at me.

"No…. No, I'm not kissing you… If I go for it, you will just avoid it." I say and Alice leans forward slowly. I stay still and Alice connects our lips her hand going under my jaw, my hand rest on Alice's waist as I kiss her for a long moment. I pull away with the wanting to keep kissing her.

I smile at her and Alice runs her thumb over my lower lip "I smeared my lipstick on you." she mumbles as she wipes at my lip. I bite her finger playfully and Alice laughs and I sigh before I step back, "Let's get going. We still have to have dinner with them." I say and Alice nods and walks with me in to the hotel and then to the apartment.

Ness pov

As soon as the door shut behind Bella and Alice, Mom turned to me. "So, what do you think?" she asked me and I paused for a minute, a smile playing on my lips.

"I like her," I say confidently. Well, except for the whole stealing my cigs thing, I amend silently.

Mom smiles but I can still see the nervous light in her eyes. She's worried. I follow her as she goes to check on dinner, grabbing my soda and taking a drink.

I take a deep breath, gazing off into space. I honestly don't know exactly what to expect from my sister considering I've never met her before today. But whatever happens I know I can handle it. Besides, from what I can tell she seems like me. Except different.

I look up at the sound of Mom's voice. "Honey, I want you to be prepared in case things don't go as well as you hope they will, alright? Just… be careful," she said softly and I raised one eyebrow at her, a smirk tugging at the edges of my mouth but I nod.

Just then, we hear a knock on the door and I go to answer it. I open the door and see Bella and Alice standing there. I take a breath through my nose and smell the familiar smell of my own cigs on them.

I raise one eyebrow and Bella grins, obviously having figured out what I'm thinking. She glances behind me and leans forward a little. "You're not getting them back," she says quietly and I frown.

"Why not?" I ask, slightly irritated and she smirks.

"Because they're terrible, that's why," she retorts glancing behind me before pulling out my pack and opening it. I look inside curiously and see the same number of cigs as before inside but they look different.

I look at Bella questioningly and she pulls one out. "This is Djarum Black. It's cinnamon flavored, so you won't smell like smoke afterwards," she tells me and I grin.

"Thanks," I say quietly, moving aside to let them in and putting the pack in my pocket. Then I look at her suspiciously. "Why are you giving these to me?" I ask and she shrugs.

"You're going to smoke anyway, right? So, I'm not gonna try to stand in your way. I could probably sit here for hours and tell you all of the disadvantages of smoking but it wouldn't do any good. Besides, these won't be quite as harsh on your voice," Bella tells me quietly as we walk to the living room and take our seats from before, where Alice leans into Bella's side and Bella puts an arm around her shoulder. I wasn't lying before; Alice is gorgeous. I shake my head.

We sit there and just talk for a while. They tell me about Forks and their school, Bella's friends, and my sister tells me about her house and the sick car I saw outside when I ask about it. All in all, she seems a lot like me. Just more… closed somehow. Like she doesn't really like to let a lot of people in or something. And I can't help but wonder why.

"So, can I ask you something?" I ask impulsively and she raises one eyebrow, motioning for me to continue. "Why are you so closed up?" I ask bluntly and I see her eyes flash. Hmm…

I must have hit a nerve but she doesn't show it except for her eyes.

"Many reasons but I think it's gonna be while before I really trust you enough to start telling you. Hell, I may never explain it all, but… At the very least, I'll try to answer your questions," she shrugs and I frown slightly but nod. I'll take what I can get for now. I grin when I smell the air.

A second later, Mom comes in and apologizes for not being out sooner. "Alright, dinner's ready. Baked chicken, mashed potatoes, and green beans. Is that alright with both of you?" she asks Bella and Alice who both nod and we all stand to make our way to the table.

Bella holds the seat for Alice and I tilt my head as I watch Bella slide the seat back forward before sitting down next to Alice. I feel a smile tug at my lips as I sit down and mom sits as well. "Would you like to say grace?" Mom asks Bella and she chokes on her soda. She coughs twice before wiping her mouth with a napkin. A smile on her lips "I'm sorry what?" she asks amused.

Mom frowns "Grace, as in pray before we eat." Mom says and I see Bella look at Alice and she holds back a laugh. I frown what's so funny about saying grace? Bella's eyes flash to mine for a second before she nods "Um, sure. Er… right." She mumbles and she sees me and mom hold hands and I stretch a hand out to Bella, as we are sitting across from each other and she holds it tentatively as she holds Alice's hand.

I must have hit a nerve but she doesn't show it except for her eyes.

"Many reasons but I think it's gonna be while before I really trust you enough to start telling you. Hell, I may never explain it all, but… At the very least, I'll try to answer your questions," she shrugs and I frown slightly but nod. I'll take what I can get for now. I grin when I smell the air.

A second later, Mom comes in and apologizes for not being out sooner. "Alright, dinner's ready. Baked chicken, mashed potatoes, and green beans. Is that alright with both of you?" she asks Bella and Alice who both nod and we all stand to make our way to the table.

Bella holds the seat for Alice and I tilt my head as I watch Bella slide the seat back forward before sitting down next to Alice. I feel a smile tug at my lips as I sit down and mom sits as well. "Would you like to say grace?" Mom asks Bella and she chokes on her soda. She coughs twice before wiping her mouth with a napkin. A smile on her lips "I'm sorry what?" she asks amused.

Mom frowns "Grace, as in pray before we eat." Mom says and I see Bella look at Alice and she holds back a laugh. I frown what's so funny about saying grace? Bella's eyes flash to mine for a second before she nods "Um, sure. Er… right." She mumbles and she sees me and mom hold hands and I stretch a hand out to Bella, as we are sitting across from each other and she holds it tentatively as she holds Alice's hand.

"Um… Er… thank you… God? For this meal that smells delicious. Um… yeah… food…cool-amen." Bella says and lets my hang go and Alice's and looks at her plate. I tried to hold in my laugh but I couldn't. I roar out laughing "you called that saying grace?" I roar with laughter.

I see Bella laugh and Alice as well. Mom gives me a disapproving glance but I laugh "Mom, that was the shittiest prayer ever!" I say and I see Bella chuckle. "I apologize, I am not exactly religious. I guess that's something I got from my father." She apologizes. I frown "Dad, wasn't religious?" I ask and I see Bella look at me for a long moment. Her eyes contemplating something.

Finally she sighs and shakes her head "No, everything but." She says before she looks at Alice. "Alice, you know about this God fellow, why don't you pray." She says and I frown. 'God Fellow'? is she serious…?

Alice looks at us before she sighs "I apologize for Bella's lack of manners. She spent too much time on her own; she has forgotten how to act around civilized people." Alice says nudging Bella. Bella scratches the back of her head "Well, I'm plenty social. Just ask anyone in Forks." She says with a grin. Her eyes flash some humor and Alice looks at her for a long second.

"Well then, let's just hope the people of Forks tuck you in tonight no?" Alice teases and Bella stares at her and then at me and mom before staring back at Alice. Her mouth slightly open "We really need to bring this up now?" she asks. Alice smirks "What? Afraid your little sister will know her sister was a player?" she asks and Bella glares at Alice, though I can see its light heartedly.

I take a bite of the food "Wow, mom this is delicious." I say before wiping my mouth "Now, what kind of a player was Bella?" I ask Alice. Bella sighs "For the love of your God, Alice. Don't give her this information." She says and pokes at her food. I chuckle lightly, her words not making exact sense.

Isn't the phrase 'for the love of God' not 'for the love of your God' Bella is so odd. I smile to myself and I see Mom fighting a smile herself as she watches the playful banter. "Nessie, your big sis here. She was the womanizer of our small town." Alice says. I laugh out a gasp "Oh… you're a 'player'" I say with a nod. Bella smirks. "Not a player. The Player." She says with a grin.

I grin back at her "Now, where does that sound familiar?" Mom teases and I pail. "Mom, no." I say and Alice laughs "Oh, no. Please don't tell me there are two of them." Alice says and Mom looks at me "Sadly it seems there is. This young girl is the social lady and boy killer at her school. You would be shocked the times I have been called down there because either girls fight over her or she is getting caught making out with some kid. To tell you the truth I don't know where she gets it from, I was such a quiet girl in school." Mom says.

I feel the blush burn on my cheeks as Bella seems to stare threw me, her eyes searching for something. Before she smirks at me "That, Ness. Is what we call the Swan Charm." She says with a grin. I smirk at her "really? in school they call it 'the Valentine spell'." I say and Bella chuckles.

"Oh trust me, its Swan. The grin, the smile, the smirk, the 'burning eyes' trick, the confidence, the grace –witch comes after the clumsiness- and the looks. All part of the Swan Charm." She says and I frown "how did you know about the clumsiness?" I ask. Bella laughs "Charlie and me both were major klutzes when we were young. Don't worry about it, it should start to even out when you grow the last few inches." She says taking a bite of her food.

Alice laughs softly "Look at you, you sound like the spokesperson for Swan Charm." She says and Mom, Bella and I laugh. "Well, I think it's only fair to warn the pour girl. I almost had a heart attack when one day I woke up and I was an inch taller than I was the week before. Then with the high I started to trip less and less until it just stopped." She says with a shrug taking another bite of the food.

She nods her head at my mom "This is really good." She says and Alice pats Bella's head. "Aww, she learned manners." Alice teases and Bella frowns "You my dear, are a hurtful person." Bella says and winks at me with the eye hidden from Alice's view.

"So, apart from the swan charm and what not. What else do we have in common?" Bella asks. I shrug "Beats me, I've only known you for an hour." I say and Bella smiles a bit "Your blunt, I like that." She says and pokes at her food thinking.

"Do you like cars?" Bella asks. I nod and she smiles "We have that." She says and things again "Favorite candy?" Bella asks. I frown in though "Gummy bears." I say and Bella thinks… "I like gummy anything to be honest." She says and I laugh. "So, Bella, who have you been staying with until you turned eighteen?" Mom asks.

Bella stops chewing and I see her eyes harden. She's blocking up on us again "No one." She says. Mom frowns "Didn't Charlie pass away when you were fifteen?" she asks. Bella shrugs "I was sixteen and I actually bribed the foster home in to leaving me at my house. I maid Jenks come every other month for the day of visits but after a while they just stopped coming." Bella says with a shrug.

Mom stares at her for a long moment, "You spent three years all by yourself?" she asks. Bella smirks a bit to herself, her tone changing in to a slight older more bitter sounding voice "I wouldn't exactly say I was alone, Clare. I just wasn't dependent of anyone." She says. She looks at her plate of food and takes another bite.

She clears her thought "So, enough of Charlie. Tell me Ness, what have you been up to lately?" Bella asks some of the life re- entering her eyes. I chew slowly "Nothing much, I'm just hanging around, some of my friends want to go to this stupid party next week but I don't like the guy who's throwing it so I may not go." I say with a shrug.

Stupid jackass Mat Henderson. Bella nods "If your gut tells you not to go, then trust it and don't go." She says nodding and I frown "What's that, another Swan thing?" I ask with a grin. She shakes her head slowly "No… it's just a sister thing." She says with a wink.

After that dinner is passed with jokes and what not. There was a bit of a ruff spot whenever Mom mentioned her and Dad together. Bella would get this look in her eyes and she would stiffen and her free hand would fist as if she was holding back some anger. I think I understood why she felt that way but, I couldn't be cause we won't ever exactly see eye to eye.

Hell, I don't know her well enough to know her point of view. I just hope she will give it time. Give us time. I grin at her when I beat her at videogames for like the fifth time. Bella pouts "You rigged this thing, I don't know how. But you did." She says pointing at me. I grin "Sorry, but no. You are just naturally sucky at this game." I say and Bella grins at me. "Well… I'm getting some. So ha." She says with a smirk.

I laugh and lean back on the couch laughing wile Bella joins me "I don't know where that came from, I apologize." She says and I laugh and push her playfully "You are one odd girl, Bella." I say and she shrugs running a hand threw her short hair. I can see strands of red in it. "We have the same hair color." I state.

She looks at me "we also have the same, eyes, jaw line, smirk, grin, smile, pout, and we both are very competitive." She says and I grin. This is just so freaking cool. "This is so cool, I am so glad you agreed to meet me." I say and Bella nods her smile becoming a bit softer. "I am to… though I must admit. I will never be the perfect sister or the best role model… but, if you give me a chance to try and get the lay of the land… I'll give it my best shot." She says with a small grin.

I smile "I'll give you a shot if you give me one." I say and Bella laughs softly sticking out her hand "Deal." She says and I nod "Deal." I say and she slides her phone out, put you're number. If you ever need me… for anything. No matter how stupid you think it is, call me. Even if it's just that you are piss drunk and you need me to pick you up." She says and I nod, I'm not exactly sure I will do it but hey, I have options now.

I type in my number quickly and then I call myself from her phone and I save it on mine. Bella grins at me "It really is crazy how much you look like me, after all I am the spitting image of Charlie." She says and I frown "Why do you call Dad, Charlie?" I ask. She bites her lip for a minute "Because… after a while. I became more the parent then he was." She says with a smile, I can tell that it's somehow fake. I just wish I knew her tell.

Just then Alice and Mom walk in laughing about something. "Bella, it's getting late. We should go." Alice says. I frown and look at the time it was five past nine ten. Bella's eyes go wide as she sees the time. "Damn, it's late. We should go pay for a room, I don't like that road at night." Bella say standing up and sliding on her leather jacket. I smile a bit at her, she is just so cool. And kinda like a bad ass. Yeah… my sister is a bad ass. I wanna be just like her, I just… I look up to her.

Bella looks at me and shrugs "I'll see ya soon?" she asks and I nod, she grins and reaches in to her jacket pocket and takes out some sunglasses and motions to me "Do you have a pair of these?" she asks. I frown "Why would I wear sunglasses?" I ask. She grins "These are as much a trait as your hair." She says and looks at me, before she slides them on.

"Personally, Alice hates them. But they work wonders for anyone you are talking to, it helps out with the mystery factor and if you don't like the person you are talking to, look for your next victim." Bella says with a wink before she throws them at me. I catch them easily and Alice slap's Bella's arm "Stop trying to turn the pour girl in to a mini you, the world has had enough with you as it is." she says and Bella grins.

"Like you don't love that I am so cool." Bella mocks and I see Mom lean against the door frame beaming at the scene of Bella. She runs a hand threw her hair and scratches the back of her neck while she tells Alice something about secrets she will pass on. I stare at mom as I see her smile to herself, biting her lip.

Bella looks at my mom and gives a nod "Clare, thank you for allowing me to visit. Next time, if you allow it maybe we could go out to eat, just so that you don't need to clean." Bella says. Mom nods "Of course, Bella." She says and Bella nods before she turns to me "And you, short stuff. I'll see you whenever you want. Just give me a call, I have a free schedule with your name on it." she says and Alice walks behind Bella and hugs her waist.

"it was nice meeting you, Ness." Alice says and I grin to myself, damn. She is gorgeous, "The pleasure was all mine, gorgeous." I say my eyes flashing on their own free will and I see Bella chuckle to herself as she wraps her arm around Alice possessively "Cut it out, Casanova. This girl is mine." Bella teases and I grin my innocent grin at her and she stares at me smirking.

She kisses Alice's cheek before looking at me "You find yourself a girl that will kick your but if ya need two. That's all you need in a woman, someone to tell you what to do." She teases and Alice elbows her "If you keep telling her stuff about me, I will dump you for that Casanova." Alice warns Bella playfully and Bella's grin turns in to a smirk.

"Please, I'm the best there is and you know it." Bella says lowly to Alice. I can hear it because of the close proximity but mom who is at the kitchen door is ignorant of what Bella aid.

"I'll see you soon Ness." Bella says before she and Alice walk out of the hallway. I close the door and take a deep breath 'well that was fun." Mom says. I smirk "Bella is so cool." I say and mom laughs. "Go take a shower and brush your teeth, it's almost time for bed." She says. I role my eyes "Yes, ma'am." I say before kissing her cheek and walking over to my room. I slide the cig pack out and hide it, "Bella is really, really cool." I mumble as I place the sunglasses on the bookshelf.

I still have a lot to learn about my sister and about my dad. Today was just the starting point and it went awesome, so I can't wait to see her again.

**A/N: what do you guys think? Don't you think it's cool how Bella fells so quickly in to the big sis role? What do you think of Ness and Clare? What about how there are now two Swans who know the Swan Charm, do you think the world has a chance? **


	71. Chapter 71

**A/N: Hey, I'm glad you guys liked the last chapter. I was just guessing that you would all like an insight on Ness's world so this chap is a bit about her.**

**I don't own twilight.**

**Ch.71**

**Nesspov**

I wake up early the next morning with a groan as Mom opens the curtains letting the evil light in my room. "Mooom." I groan as I roll over and hide my head in the pillow. Mom sits on the bed and smacks my butt; I jump up and straighten until I am sitting up on the bed. "Mom, its summer vacation. Give me a break." I say with a yawn. "It may be summer honey but that doesn't mean you can sleep in all day. Besides I just got off the phone with Alice, Bella has a meeting this morning in town but she will be free for lunch and afterwards. So they invited us to hang out with them." She says.

I feel my lips twitch in a grin "Sweet, but. Why is Bella working on a weekend?" I ask mom. She sighs "I'm afraid that Volturi Beer is a full time job." Mom says with a sad smile. I frown as I sit better and lean against my head board "Was dad like that?" I ask. Mom gets a soft smile on her lips "Yes, he was. He always put his work before his own good; I don't think Bella was kidding when she called herself a workaholic. Charlie was exactly the same." She says with a melancholic smile.

I smile sadly "Bella's really cool." I state. Mom chuckles as she messes with my hair "I must admit she does have that mysterious look going for her." Mom says and I chuckle, "Charlie had that exact same thing going for him and so do you my little trouble maker." She says and ruffles my hair. I push her hand away "Alright, alright. I'm getting ready for us to leave." I mumble as I stand from the bed and walk over to the bathroom and take a long shower.

After I finish my routine in the bathroom, staying a few minutes extra enjoying the warm water before I get out and get dressed in my signature long sleeve shirt under a band T and my ripped Jeans. I slide on the sun glasses Bella gave me and grin a bit to myself. They actually look good on me; huh I didn't think I could pull it off.

I hear my mom knock on my door and I turn to see her stop in the doorway her face going blank for a second before she smiles softly "You ready to go?" she asks. I nod "Sure." I say and slide on my head phones before sneaking my pack in my back pocket when mom turned around.

I fallow her out and we both walk in silence down the street, me bobbing my head to the rhythm of the song I was listening to. When we reach a café a block and a half away I immediately see Alice sitting under a shade umbrella and grin. Hey, she may be Bella's girl but she is still fair game to look at.

Mom looks around for a second before she spots Alice, we walk over and Alice looks up the fashionable fez hat she has on looking amazing with her purple sunglasses and purple white top. Mom smiles "Hello, Alice." Mom says. Alice stands "Hey, Clare, Ness. Bella is running a bit late, something about the meeting getting dragged out. She says she will try to make it as soon as possible." Alice says sitting down and we both sit with her.

Mom suddenly shakes her head "Alice, I know this is a bit much to ask. But do you mind watching Ness for a few minutes while I run a quick errand." Mom says to her. I frown "mom, I don't need a baby sitter. I'm thirteen." I state. She smiles "I know honey." She says and looks back at Alice.

Alice laughs softly "Sure thing, Clare." Alice says with an easy grin. Mom sighs "Thank you so much, you're a life saver." She says to Alice before mom kisses the top of my head "Behave yourself, Renesmee." She warns before she walks down the street once again quickly.

I chuckle at her and look back to Alice. She reaches forward and pulls the sunglasses off my face and I pout. "I'm sorry but I hate the damn things. I was ecstatic when Bella gave you her pair but then I saw that she has around four spares in her car." Alice says and I laugh. "So, tell me about Bella." I say leaning forward even going as far as to give her my burning eyes trick.

Alice smirks "Nice try kid, I'm used to that trick. I get it every five minutes from Bella. Trust me; you got nothing on her eyes. That trick will only get stronger by the years." She says to me and I grin at her. "Ok, I get it. You two are in love, blah, blah, blah. But really, on a scale from 1 to 10 on my chances with you, where do I stand?" I ask with a grin and I wag my eyebrows once. Of course I am joking, but hey a little info won't hurt.

Alice ducks her head to chuckle as she takes a drink from her coffee "Negative Ten, Casanova." I hear Bella say from behind me. I groan "Bella, I was finally going to get an answer." I joke. Bella pats my back once "Yeah, good luck with that. Took me a month or so to get her to like me." She says around her cig as she walks over to Alice's side and pulls the cig out of her mouth and leans down to touch her lips to Alice's firmly.

I look away out of politeness other than sheer want. I hear the chair scrape and look over to instead of seeing Bella sitting down I see Alice standing up with her arms around Bella's neck. I clear my though "Yo, I'm still here." I say and Bella groans as she pulls away from Alice.

"I thought that shit only happened in movies." Bella says taking another drag as she sits down looking at me. I shrug "How should I know?" I ask and she smirks. "Alice hated the shades didn't she?" Bella asks taking another drag. I nod and Bella smirks as she hands the cig to Alice "Typical." Bella mumbles as she blows smoke out.

I chuckle at her and I smell the cinnamon from here. "So, where's your mom?" Bell's asks. I shrug "Beats me, she told Alice to watch me while she did some errands." I say. She nods and slides off her sunglasses and I see that she has circles under her eyes.

"Dude, you look beat." I say and she smirks "that's life for ya." She says with a shrug and leans back and Alice puts out the cig blowing out a gust of smoke. "I would offer you a smoke but unlike Bella I wanted to throw them out." Alice says. I give her a week grin and Bella chuckles "I think I might get a hang of the sister thing eventually." She says with a care free shrug.

I grin at her "I think you're doing a wonderful job." I say and Bella flashes me a grin. "So, what are we eating?" she asks me. I shrug "I'm not sure." I say and look at the menu, just then I hear a giggle that I have learned to recognize. "Shit." I mumble as I slide down my seat.

Bella looks at me with her head to the side before a wicked grin stretches on her lips but she looks back to her menu. I sigh in relief and slowly slide back up and relax, as I get lost in the menu. Damn, I'm starving. Of course, this was my mistake because not even three minutes later I feel a tap on my shoulder. I see Bella look up from her menu, smirk still in place as she runs a hand threw her short hair.

I look behind me to see Mindy Sanchez. I grin. "H-hey, Min." I say standing up. She smiles at me "Hey, Ness. I was just wondering if you were busy tonight?" she asks. I try to fight off my grin "What would we be doing?" I ask tilting my head to the side. My eyes shining in that innocent thing as I take a step closer to Mindy.

Her blond hair falling across her face when she ducks it and I lift my hand to brush it innocently behind her ear. I grin at her when she looks up, biting her lip. "I was wondering if you were down for a movie night at my place. My parents are going to this stupid anniversary dinner and I was just wondering if you wanted to keep me company." She says her soft russet skin turning red at her cheeks.

I bite my lip to hold a smirk and side step her and shrug "Well… I don't know. I'll have to ask mom about it..." I trail off. I look at Min with the corner of my eye. Fall for it, come on… come on Min… don't let me down. I twirl one of my locks before I look back at her and she looks at me with a sly smile. "Please try to be there, it would make me pretty happy." She says taking an even closer step to me.

I bite my lip and look at her "Will you make it worth my wild?" I ask her and she shrugs "That all depends." She says. I raise my eyebrow "On?" I ask. "If you can be there." She says and I grin, "I'll be there." I say and she beams. "Great, be around at eight." She says and kisses my cheek before she walks off with Molly and Sarah.

I sit back down and look to the side to see Alice staring at me and before I can even speak, Bella roars with laughter. "God, pleas have mercy on us." She says and Bella try's to die down her laughter. "Is that what I look like when I do it?" she asks. Alice nods "But you always make out with the person, and then you fuck them." She states. My eyes go wide and Bella just grins "Yeah, but now I have you and that is a total win." She says and kisses Alice's cheek. I raise an eyebrow "Still thirteen, here." I state and Alice looks at me "Like you don't know what the word fuck means." She says with an eye role.

I lick my lips and grin "I shall do as you say and say as you do." I say to her with a smirk. Bella's eyebrow's furrow before she looks at me, "Are you really hitting on her while I am right here?" she asks. I flash her a wink "it's only flirting when she does it back." I say and Bella study's me for a second.

"I like you, Casanova. Just stay away from my girl." She says and slide's an arm around Alice. I sigh but nod with a small smile playing at my lips before the waitress comes and she almost immediately starts flirting with Bella. I see Alice glare at the woman but I stay quiet as Bella ignores the woman and just asks for a Pastrami and coke. Alice asks for a tuna salad, but after some convincing form Bella she orders a chicken sandwich.

The waitress turns to me and smiles "Hey, little Ness. Where's your mom?" she asks. I shrug "She went to get some things finished up; I'm here with my sister Bella." I say and she looks at Bella before her eyes go wide. "I didn't know you had a sister Vicky says. I shrug "Neither did she." I mumble under my breath and smile "She doesn't visit a lot." I say and Bella interrupts "Witch will change." She adds and I grin at her.

Vicky nods "So, you will have the usual?" she asks. I nod and Vicky leaves. "So, Alice. Doesn't it annoy you at least a little that girls just automatically flirt with Bella?" I ask. Alice takes a sip of her water and shrugs "I'm used to it; she doesn't do it on purpose. It's just a part of who she is; she feeds off it. Who am I to deny her that?" Alice asks. I nod deep in thought.

Bella clicks her tongue "Besides, it doesn't hurt that I will always just see her." Bella ads with a soft smile playing at her lips. Her eyes seem to shine with some deep emotion before she closes it off and straightens up to look around. "Oh, Ness. Here comes another one of your girlfriends." Bella says with a smirk and I look behind me to see the girl who the giggle belonged two. Shit.

I stand up "Hey, babe." I say with a soft smile. Amy stands in front of me "Babe? Don't call me babe." She snaps. I role my eyes "Amy, we have this argument every single day. Chill out, we aren't together." I say and she glares at me and I take a step back automatically, crazy girl.

"Yeah, we are. You told me, you wanted to date me." she says and I look at Bella to see her trying to communicate something with me with her eyes. I don't understand and look back to Amy "Yeah, that was before your boyfriend almost beat the crap out of me." I say stepping closer to her. "now, can you please lower your voice? We are in public and this is not the place to have this conversation. I have guests." I say lowly to her.

I put an arm around her waist and she pushes my arm off her "Don't touch me." she says and I lift my hands "Have you always been this unreasonable?" I ask. I hear Alice groan behind me before I hear a chair screech and I feel an arm over my shoulder, I look up to see Bella grinning down at Amy.

"Ness, don't be so rude to the girl." She says in a smooth tone. I see Amy's eyes shine as she looks up to Bella. Bella does the burning thing and smiles down at her "Amy was it?" she asks. Amy minds "Um, ye-yeah." She says and Bella nods "I'm afraid this whole thing is my fault. I've been keeping ness busy for way to long." She says taking Amy's hand and holding it as she takes a semi step closer.

"Um… what?" Amy asks a dazed look on her face. I stare at Bella as she hits the back of my head gently her eyes still connected with Amy's. "Ness just said if you wanted to hang out a bit on Monday." She says and Amy looks at me. I smile at her "Of course you can invite a friend if you are still unhappy with me." I say smoothly and Bella pats my back.

"I'm sorry Amy; it seems your friends want you back. It would be terribly rude of us to hold you here any longer. Please, consider Ness's offer and I hope to see you soon." She says before she winks at Amy and goes to sit back down. Alice has a scowl on her face and Amy looks at me "I'll see you Monday." She says and I nod once and she walks away.

I stare at Bella for a long moment once I sit down. "how did you… she was so mad." I state and Bella shrugs. "Trust me; she could have made a bigger scene." She says and the food gets here. Just then mom show's up and sits in her seat "Sorry, I took so long. Marissa needed to ask some questions about my resume." She says. Bella takes a drink of her soda, "you need a job, really?" she asks.

Mom stares at her for a second "Well, I know you gave us a generous amount of money but, most of it has gone-" Bella cuts her off "it's gone?!" she asks. Mom stares at her and Bella wipes her mouth with a napkin. "Can I speak with you?" Bella asks as she stands up forcefully. Mom stops for a minute before she fallows threw and stands.

I frown as I see Bella and mom walk to the far end of the café where I am out of earshot.

**Bpov**

"How the hell did you use 30G!" I ask angrily. Clare stares at me "Well, some of it was used to pay some old loans. Other's for some of new clothes, medical expenses, us moving three states away, buying new furniture. Bella, it helped us a lot but it wasn't enough to set us for life." She says to me.

I clench my jaw tightly anger burning threw me, intensely. "Clare… thirty grand doesn't just vanish that easily. Are you an addict, are you buying meth with it or something? It would make more sense then you telling me that money is just gone!" I growl at her. Clare glares at me "No, I am not an addict. Or any of the things you have accused me off. Some of the money is in a frozen account for Ness, a trust fund and the other in a college fund." She says.

I shake my head "No, you don't need to save the money I gave you. You use it, I will take care of her College founds and her trust fund is already set Clare. I thought Victor told you this already." I say to her. She glares "No, but what he did tell me is that you constantly referred to me as the tramp and as Ness as the brat." She snaps back.

I clench my jaw "What did you want me to say? Be happy with you? No, I don't like you. I will never like you, the only reason I am even talking to you somewhat civil is for Ness's sake. So don't doubt why I am here." I growl out to her. "What happened to you? what happened to that sweet girl I used to see playing around and I used to hear Charlie talk about constantly?" she asks.

I clench my jaw so tightly I feel it quiver, I take a step closer to her "She grew up and saw the world how it really was. Without all the bullshit people feed to another. My father made sure I learned that lesson." I say to her. Clare's face goes blank as I breathe deep. "He was dying, where the hell were you? You didn't even show up at the funeral, you didn't even try to contact me after my dad's death. Is that you're type of love?" I ask her.

Clare stares at me "He… he didn't want me, me and Ness. He just vanished one day, a letter that said he would come back when he could and then another that said he wouldn't be coming back and that he was sick. Then when I got Ness's letter… I saw the news a few days after... I was too late." She says her voice almost breaking.

I glare at her "No, don't you dare cry." I say to her. She puts a hand on her face to hold back the tears and I feel my anger simmer "This conversation isn't over; now get your shit together before we get back. I don't want Ness to see you this way, especially not because it's my fault." I say and turn to look away from her.

She sniffs "Why… why do you care what she thinks?" Clare asks and I role my head to her "I'm not sure yet." I say as me and her walk back to the table. "She's happy Bella, she has waited so long to meet you." she says. I look at Ness from where I am standing and I feel a smile twitch at my lips… "I have a lot of birthdays to make up for, don't I?" I ask Clare trying to make her laugh witch I do.

GRRRFV

I grin a bit as I sit back down, my head spinning with all the new thoughts. This is so confusing, when did my life get so complicated?

**A/N: like? Hate? Ehh? Review?**


	72. Chapter 72

**A/N: Hey, guys. So glad you liked the last chap and that you are all so accepting of Ness. Here is the next chap.**

**I don't own twilight, but I do own this freaking awesome plot.**

**Ch.72**

**Apov**

I wake up to the feeling of Bella's strong, warm and protective arms around my waist. I stay still as my mind flashes back to the occurrences of the last few days. Bella meeting her sister Ness. Her sister hitting on me, Bella close to the edge on her anger with Clare. There were a lot of things to consider. It was crazy and hectic, and it wasn't even my whole crazy life.

I snuggle in to Bella sighing softly, my girl. My sweet, crazy, loving girl. I am so happy you're here with me, I'm so happy you decided to meet your sister. You look so happy when you speak to her, I can see your quiet more guarded manor slip away somehow.

I shift again and turn to look at her. I start to kiss her bicep, shoulder, jaw and again. I hear Bella moan softly as she shifts to wrap her arms around my waist and pull me close to her. She shifts her head to the side giving me better access as a soft sigh leaves her lips. "Alice… hmmm, what a great way to wake up." She mumbles and I smile to myself and nip at her jaw before I pull away my arms on either side of her head as I look down at Bella.

She smiles a bit to herself as she cups my cheeks in her hands and runs a thumb along my jaw "Good morning beautiful." She says, her eyes shining with love, only love. I feel my heart swell "Good morning, Bell." I say giving her a soft smile as I lean forward and connect our lips; we kiss softly my arms still holding me up over her. Bella breaks the kiss and leans back against the pillows with a smile playing on her lips.

"What?" I ask smiling myself. She grins "Nothing, you just look beautiful in the morning." She states. I role my eyes "Yeah, bed hair, no makeup, I bet I look just stunning." I say to her. Bella frowns a bit. "You don't need make up, and your hair looks just fine to me. You, my love are stunning." She says to me. I chuckle and sit next to her on the bed "Whatever you say, my crazy girl." I say and I feel Bella's arm wrap around my waist pulling me under her as she roles over to hover over me.

"Alice… don't think I'm lying to you when I say you are beautiful." She says her eyes showing her honesty. I smile and touch my lips to hers quickly, "I know you're not." I mumble against her lips and I feel Bella push me down on the mattress, her kiss becoming more frantic in pace.

"Bella…" I moan softly when I feel her knee press against my center. Her lips brush against my ear "I love you." she mumbles before she pulls away from me completely and lays down next to me, her head turned to look at me. I breathe out a laugh and look at her and raise an eyebrow and she shrugs "I didn't think you were in the mood." She mumbles, her brown/black eyes shining with true innocence.

"Bella." I state and she lifts an eyebrow looking at me. I grab the pillow with my right hand, out of her view and launch it forward hitting her on the side of the bed. "You are such a total freaking tease." I say and stand from the bed after smacking her but, witch made her yelp like a small dog.

I smirk to myself as I get under the gust of the shower, Bella you are going to drive me insane. I put shampoo in to my hair as I start to massage my scalp, I close my eyes to wash the shampoo out of my hair and I hear the distinct sound of the bathroom door opening. I ignore it, knowing its Bella and wash the soap out of my hair. I flip my head back so that I can see and look out of the glass door to see Bella brushing her teeth starting at me.

I frown to myself, amused. "What are you doing, creeper?" I ask. Bella turns to spit in the bowl "Nothing, I just think you look sexy." She says with a grin. I fake glare at her "Stop watching me take a shower." I state. She smirks back at me, wiping her mouth and crossing her arms over her chest "Make me." she challenges. I role my eyes "You are such a closet perv." I say to her as I turn to put on conditioner.

I hear Bella laugh to herself but when I turn she shuts up smiling innocently at me. I frown at her "what are you laughing at?" I ask. Bella grins like a child getting caught doing something they know they weren't supposed to be doing by an adult that won't punish them. Her eyes flash in a slight taunting way "Oh, nothing." She says and I frown as I look in the shower.

"IS THERE A SPIDER IN HERE?" I yell at her. She shakes her head "Baby, there are no spiders. Calm down." She says with a laugh. I sigh, "Fuck, don't scare me. Just tell me what you were laughing at." I say. She walks over to the shower door and opens it and sticks her head in, her eyes fallow the trail of water down my body before looking up.

"Fuck, you are just beautiful." She says her eyes dark and hypnotized. I frown a bit at that and splash her with water. "Stop it." I say and she looks at me in the eyes "What? I am just staring at you." she says her eyes still looking darker than usual. "Don't." I say turning around to rinse off the conditioner.

I don't know why but I am suddenly shy around Bella. I think it started last week when I saw that girl flirting with her. She was way prettier than me. And she's not the only one. So many. There are so many other girls that are far prettier than me. Compared to them, I'm nothing… I shake my head. Don't be stupid, Ali. Bella loves you. Just then I feel Bella's soft hand grab mine gently and when I turn I see Bella still fully dressed in her black wife beater and boxers looking down at me with a puzzled expression on me.

"What's a matter with you, Ali?" she asks softly. I shut off the water before she can get completely soaked, "Nothing, Bell. I'm just not in the mood for sex." I lie. She frowns "I wasn't… never mind, I can see how I just gave off that impression. I apologize, you do know I love anything we do together, no matter what it is." she says and after flashing me a sheepish smile she steps out of the shower and quickly out of the bathroom.

I slump against the tile of the bathroom, I am such a jerk. I turn the water back on and finish up my shower, what is wrong with me. My time of the month is over and normally I am crazy to just jump her after but… I don't know what is wrong with me. I walk to the room towel wrapped tightly around me and Bella looks up from the bed where she was lying in.

She gives me a hint of a smile and winks at me before laying back down her head bopping to the sound of the music on her iPod. Her face relaxes as she seems to get lost in the song and I get dressed quickly and decide to stop acting silly. I sit on the corner of the bed, and pat Bell's leg. She lifts her head and takes one of the ear buds out and grins at me "Yeah?" she asks and just then I just see the tremendous youth in Bella.

I realize that… I have always kinda seen Bella as an adult. The way she acts and thinks, I've always seen her as an adult in a way. It's weird when I see Bella act like the teen she is, relaxing listening to music. Playing video games, joking about everything… its Ness. Her little sister is bringing out the kid in Bella again, I smile at Bella and she chuckles raising an eyebrow "Something ya wanted babe?" Bella asks and I shake my head smiling "No, nothing. Just to apologize for the bathroom thing, I know you weren't after sex." I say and she shakes her head brushing it off.

"No biggie, now. Come here." She says and stretches her arms out away from her opening them for me. I role so that I am in her arms and lying down as she is lying sideways next to me. She places an earphone in my ear and instantly I recognize the song and laugh at her "What is your obsession with Lion King 2?" I ask her. She grins down at me, "To tell you the truth… I love the difficult love with Kiara and Kovu." She says with a sad smile.

"_**Why do you like Kovu so much?" I had asked her once. "We are one." She had said before chuckling about her own joke. "No, really why?" I asked poking her stomach and she had sat up to answer "I already did, me and him… were one. We are the same, except for the obvious girl to boy ratio and the whole lion to human thin. But the message is pretty clear." She said before digging her head in the pillows.**_

"I love you." I say smiling at her; she smiles back "I love you more." She says and leans forward to touch our lips together. "And Alice… you are way more pretty then that stupid girl last week." Bella says before pulling away. I stare at her in a slight form of shock "How did you..." I trail off. She smirks "I didn't, I guessed and you just told me so." She says and I laugh at her.

"You tricky, sly girl." I say before I shove her softly and shift so that I can sit on her lap. Bella frowns to herself a bit "Alice, I don't know if you have noticed but your giving me a bit of a whiplash with your mood swings. You're not pregnant are you?" she asks smacking her forehead "Don't be silly, wrap your willy! How did I forget that!" she says in fake panic.

I burry my head in her neck laughing at her silliness as she joins in, in the laughter. "You're crazy." I mumble looking at her, brushing a few locks of her hair out of her eyes with my fingertips. "I'm crazy for you if that counts." She says her breathing deep but even, completely relaxed.

"It does." I say and lean down to kiss she, Bella lets me control the whole thing. Her hands just holding my face and my waist.

**You know what to do!**

I grind on Bella and feel her shudder "Fuck." She moans on my lips and I circle my hips on hers feeling her pull my head closer in to hers as she bites my lip.

She lifts her legs a bit so that I am sitting on her lower stomach and she lifts her head up pushing me against her legs until I am lying on the bed, Bella in between my legs. Her hand slides under my/her shirt cupping me deliciously as my hands fist in her hair.

"God, I want you so much." I breathe out when I feel and see her take off her shirt; I let my eyes trail over her smooth light sun kissed skin and her abs. I let my hand slide over her skin, feeling her abdomen muscles clench as my hands pass. I look up to her face to see her face in a state of bliss.

I lean forward sucking on Bella's smooth breast as I hear her soft gasp and she moans knotting a hand in my hair, telling me to stay there. I suck harder and feel her chest go up and down as she struggles for a breath. "Ungh…. Damn Alice…oh, fuck." She breaths. And I feel her grind against me, making me moan against her chest. I break away to switch and find the same results, Bella's breathless moaning.

Once I am done with that Bella connects our lips with a slight groan as she pins me against the mattress. She pulls my waist against hers, my thigh's parted so that her crotch and mine can brush easily and she thrusts once against me, making my head snap back in a moan as Bella trails down my neck and stops kissing me to yank my shirt over my head.

I feel her hands at the top of my shorts and I feel her undo the zipper and button before she yanks them down to mid thy before her hand replaces my underwear. She presses her hand against me firmly and I try to maintain my loud moans but Bella isn't having any of that. "I want to fuck you, I want you to moan baby, I want you to cum so hard you won't be able to walk. Moan for me, you want me done you?" she breaths under my ear.

I feel my abdomen clench at Bella's teasing words. I feel one of her finders rub against my folds and her thumb brush across my clit making me moan to Bella. One of her fingers slide in to me, making me raise my hips to allow her to go deeper. "Oh, you're so tight, your so wet." She moans and bites at my neck before thrusting another finger in me and then another. I feel myself stretch and burn in such a good way.

"Ungh... oh Bella…. Keep going… don't stop." I moan and she kisses my lips as her rocking and thrusting in to me rocks us on the bed. "You feel so good." I breathe out and Bella kiss at my neck before thrusting even harder, hitting my G-spot. She really wants me to cum, she's actually fucking me and I love it. I lift one leg a bit higher giving her perfect access to mean and I feel her pull away completely and draw out form me to yank my pants down the hole way.

Her fingers are replaced with her tongue and even before I understand what is happening I am straddling her face, my hands clamped on the head board as I rock against her tongue.

After a few minutes I feel Bella start to suck and lick at my clit making me quake above her. "Shit…. oh, Bella…. Don't stop…. I'm so close, ugh… right there baby." She seems to have been listening because she was flicking her tongue against my clit when I said it and now she's repeating it. I feel myself pulse before my orgasm washes over me. My eyes black out and my body spasms as wave after wave of ecstasy.

**FREE TO READ!**

After a minute or so I feel my eyes flutter and I look to my side to see Bella twirling a peace of my short hair in her fingertips a small smirk playing at her lips. "Welcome back." She says as her burning eyes meet mine. My abdomen clenches at the sight of her and I lean forward to kiss her, she chuckles against my lips as I pin her on the bed. She shifts "Baby, I need a drink and you blacked out on me for around a minute or so, I didn't want to leave you alone." She says before she stands from the bed, her naked body taunting me as I let my eyes trail over her skin.

Bella turns to face me and I look up to her eyes as she smirks "You want anything?" she asks. I lick my lips "I have a few ideas." I say and my eyes trail suggestively over her body. She takes a deep breath "Don't look at me like I am food, I have enough trouble walking away as it is." Bella mutters as she walks out of the hotel room and to the kitchen.

I lean back on the bed and run a hand threw my hair, "Bella, I don't care what you say but you better get back in this bed!" I yell a half minute after she leaves. I hear her laugh just outside the door, "What, I just left for a drink." Bella says leaning on the door frame a beer bottle in her hand and another at her lips.

She pulls the bottle away and walks over to me and sits next to my lying form and hands me the beer bottle, I take it and drink down two gulps of the sweet liquid "Smirnoff? What ever happened to Volturi Beer?" I ask jokingly. She smiles a bit as she pulls the bottle to her lips and takes a drink "I wasn't in the mood for something earthy, I wanted juice, there isn't juice in the fridge. There was Beer, whisky and Smirnoff. This one was green apple, you do the science." She says with a shrug and I chuckle as she shifts so that she is sitting facing me and she stares at my eyes for a long moment, thoughtful almost.

"You know… I brought something from home with me… I found it in a box under my bed." She says with a smirk as she takes another sip. I sit up on the bed, leaning against the head board as the sheets tangle with me. I feel Bella's fingers play across my leg as she tilts her head to the side "And… I may want to try it with you." she says a soft grin.

I raise an eyebrow as I pull the bottle away from my lips; I lick them "You may, want to try it with me?" I ask, holding a grin. Bella's grin changes from teasing to wolfish as her eyes burn to my eyes, "Yes, I may… if I think you can handle it." she says as she finishes the beer and puts it on the night stand, I take the last sip, a drop falls from my lips and when I go to wipe it Bella holds my hand back and leans forward, the bottle already on the counter top as she leans forward.

**SKIP TO THE NEXT BORDER LINE! /o/ to the window \o\ to the wall \o/ yeah!**

Bella licks my neck up to my chin and to my lips before claiming them, almost impulsively. She's not in the mood for soft and gentle and loving. She wants to feel and I understand that completely. I feel her hand trail over my bare skin before she lifts my hip to hers and just pushes against my clit.

Her lip bites mine and I feel a rush of arousal run threw my veins as I knot my hand in her hair and open my legs so she can settle there, which she does. Our lips are frantic on each other's as the clout of lust consumes us, Bella pulls away gasping for breath leaning her forehead on mine. "You think you can handle my toys?" she asks against my lips. I smirk and nip at her lip "You know I can." I taunt.

Her arm that was wrapped around my waist holding me to her releases me. Bella's breath brushes across my lips as her dark eyes find mine "I love you." she says and I smile a bit, "I love you too." I say and she smirks to herself as she roles over on the bed and digs in the night stand until she pulls something red out.

I frown as I see it, ok, a dildo. We have used these, what's with the hesitation? Then I see it… doesn't have a strap. Ok? How are we going to use this? Like a vibrator… I open my mouth but Bella shakes her head "This isn't a normal strapless dildo." She says and I nod.

"It's not going to hurt you… well, I hope it's not." She says with a wink. I grin a bit at her as she hands it to me and I frown a bit, "This is a double ended dildo?" I ask. She shakes her head and shrugs "It is, but it's called a feeldoe." Bella says as she sits a bit closer to me. I twist it in my hands "So… how would this... work?" I ask feeling my abdomen clench as I see how thick this thing is, shit…

Bella kisses my shoulder and places a long open mouth kiss on my neck, "This end…" she trials her hand to the second curved end with a thick top "Goes in me." she says against my neck as she bites softly "And this end…" she trails off as she cups the dick like shape with her hands "Goes in here." She says and cups my naked crotch. I moan a bit when she teases my clit with her finger tips and she chuckles "Still sensitive?" she breathes against my neck as she starts to place open mouth kisses on my neck.

I gulp down my breathing getting deeper as Bella's hand rubs against my clit and lips. "Your so wet…" she trails off quietly kissing under my ear and she trails her lips up to my lips before she stays at my lips "Do you want to try it out?" she asks, a small teasing smirk playing at the corner of her lips.

I nod and I feel Bella kiss me softly before she ducks her head on my shoulder and gives a big moan, I look between our bodies to see the dildo slide in her and I cup her hand and help slide it in to her. Her moan changes in to a grunt when she's done and she breathes in deep.

She connects our lips frantically and easily puts both of my legs over her shoulder as she penetrates me with the toy. My moan is cut off by her soft moan and then I feel the toy vibrate and I think I lose it just then. Bella kisses me before she speaks softly "Try not to pass out." She says and I'm about to retort but she thrust in me with the toy and I feel my head snap back as my breath is pushed out of me in ecstasy.

This can't feel so good, this is crazy. My mind is swimming with every quick, hard thrust Bella gives me. She's frantic, as she starts to thrust harder and faster until the vibrations, thrusting and pleasure are so freaking good. I feel the burn start almost immediately. Shit, this is so fast, "Fuck…. Oh… Bella..." I moan out and Bella touches my lips to hers before she moans in pleasure.

I feel her hit my G spot over and over again in a frantic quick rhythm. Shit, this feels so good. Nothing should feel so good; it should be illegal to feel this good. Well, if it counts people think I'm going to hell for this pleasure. And if that's the price to pay, fuck ill pay it every single day.

I feel my head snap back as my inside's clench and I feel Bella's hand go to my abdomen and push against my lower stomach with her hand while the other is knotted in my hair. It's too much; this is just to freaking much.

I feel my body spasm, shake and… wait what? I'm cumming, but... shit I'm squirting. I feel my mouth open but I feel Bella shake over me before she spasms and lands on me and I feel myself black out. Shit… this feels so good, is my last thought.

**Bpov**

This is it, this is it. I push against Alice's lower abdomen; she won't be able to walk after this. But she will never feel this good with someone else, unless there like the sex god I am. I thrust in to her and I feel her spasm, rock and I quickly pull out of her just in time as her squirting orgasm hits her and I put my hand in the way as I rub frantically at her folds trying to make her orgasm last longer. I pant as I collapse on her just as my orgasm takes over me. My body shakes and rocks and fuck, this is just too good. I feel my mind go blank, bliss.

**YOU CAN ALL READ SAFELY NOW! Bpov**

I'm panting as I role over Alice, she's still out. I try to hold back the smirk as I take the feeldoe out and place it on the ground as I try to catch my panting breath. Shit…. that was intense. Fuck, I made Alice squirt!

I let the smirk come full force as I look over at Alice, she's blinking rapidly. She's coming back to me now. I role on my side and wait until Alice finally looks at me, bewildered, bliss, confusion, amazement, gratefulness, embarrassment and love. Is what I see in her eyes.

I wonder why she is embarrassed? "Bella…. What…" she trials off in question. I grin "That is called fucking." I say as I lay back down on the bed, my sweaty back connecting with the blanket making it stick to me.

I let my hand reach over and I grab my cigs. I light one up before I bring it to my lips and take a nice long drag of it. "Bella… did I freaking pee?" she asks as she looks at her soaked center and bed sheets. I blow out the smoke slowly "Noope. It's not pee." I say with a smile. "Then what the hell is all of this?" she asks. I shrug "Hell if I know, I just know I gave you the best orgasm there is." I say as I role to my side to look at her.

She shake her head and goes to stand up and I hold her hand "Don't get up, you won't be able to walk for a few minutes." I say and Alice looks at me doubtfully and I just shake my head and lay back down as Alice does the same. "Shit, Bella… that felt amazing." She says. I smile to myself and kiss the top of her head and put out my cig on the ash tray.

"I try my best." I say jokingly and I feel Alice tilt my head to hers and she kisses me softly "Thank you." she whispers against my lips as we pull apart. I grin sheepishly at her "There's no need for thanks, I just love making you feel good. I feel like this every day I'm with you." I say and Alice chuckles and kisses me again.

I hear a knock on the door and frown as I sit up "I'll get that." I say as Alice chuckles and try's to stand on wobbly legs as I hold her waist to me, "I told you not to stand up." I say as I sit her on the edge of the bed and kiss the top of her head as I grab a shirt and boxer shorts and slip them on as I make my way to the hotel room door. I open the door and see Ness leaning across the hall.

She takes one look at me before smirking and I set a small heated glare on her. "What's up Ness?" I ask leaning against the door. "Nothing, I just got back from Mindy's and my mom didn't leave a spare key for me under the mat so I was wondering if I could chill here for a bit while my mom gets back." Ness asks.

I smirk to myself as I bite my lip to hold back a laugh "How did that 'sleep over' go?" I ask. Ness ducks her head and I see her cheeks blush as I laugh to myself and step to the side "Come on in, I was just about to hop in a shower." I say and Ness nods and walks in to the room.

"You are such a prude." I say as Ness sits down and crosses her arms over her chest. "I am not, I just think it's a bit weird to talk about sex with my big sister." Ness says scratching the back of her head. I try to hold back the joy that weirdly spreads threw me when she calls me her big sister.

"Well, if you can't talk to me about it, who will you talk about it to?" I ask sitting down on the couch. Ness shrugs "I call always tell Maggie and Noah." She says with a shrug. I furrow my brows "Best friends?" I wonder and she nods "Yeah, they are the best." She says her eyes shining with joy.

I lean back on the couch, she's so… open. So much like I was before…. I shake my head and stand up "Just never get to comfortable with friends Ness, you never know what dark side they have." I say as I walk to the kitchen. I hear her footsteps behind me "What do you mean?" she asks and I open and close cabinets searching for food, trying not to look at Ness until I control the simmering anger in me.

"I just mean, you never know if you friends have a hidden agenda. You can never be too careful." I say but I keep my tone neutral. Not giving her the opportunity to know I am having a small brake down. I close the last of my cabinets and switch to the fridge "You hungry, Ness?" I ask.

"Bella… look at me for a sec." she says and I shut my eyes tightly before putting on an indifferent mask with fake confusion as I turn to stare at her. Her dark/brown eyes meet mine and she study's me for a minute. "What up?" I ask and she frowns across from the island.

"Why do I get the feeling that your words are warnings, instead of advice." Ness asks, her dark eyes studying me to see if I have a fault in my mask. "I'm sorry if that's the way the sound, Ness. It's just advice, not meant to make you feel edgy." I say slowly making sure my words don't lace with the venom in me.

"You lying to me… no, not lying. You're avoiding telling me something, but… I don't know what it is, so I can ask you about it." she says walking over to me. My back stiffens and my jaw clenches as her eyes study me once again. "What is your tell? What is it that tells me you are lying?" she asks more to herself then to me as she study's me. I place a fake smirk on my lips "I don't have a tell, what reason do I have to lie?" I ask in fake cockiness

"I don't know yet, I just wish you could trust me enough to tell me." she says with a shrug. I chuckle and tilt my head to look at her "Ness… trust is not a virtue that comes easily to me." I say and she frowns. "Then what does come easily to you?" she asks.

I purse my lips before a grin passes through my lips "Nothing." I admit as I lean my hip again the counter "What do you mean by that?" she asks. I smile to myself "Nothing good come's easy in life, Ness. So nothing comes easy to me, I've been left alone to rot for a bit too long." I say my eyes searching Ness's carefully.

She frowns, sadness covering her features "Did you really stay alone all these years?" she asks me. I frown "I've been alone for way longer, Ness." I admit as I open the fridge and find some toaster waffles. I take the box out and put it on the counter as I open the bag and put waffles in the toaster.

I turn to look at Ness "ya hungry?" I ask and she nods and I nod and take out three plates and three cups. "Where is Alice?" Ness asks. I take out the done waffles and put in new ones. I put the waffles on the plate "She's taking a shower." I say as I put the plate in front of Ness.

She nods in thanks and starts digging in. "I'm going to check on her, see if she's hungry." I say and walk to the bedroom and to the bathroom in the room "Alice, babe you want waffles?" I ask as I open the door to see her lying down on the bath tub.

I chuckle "Tired?" I ask kneeling next to her head. She opens her eyes lazily "Enjoying the warm water." Alice says, her eyes meeting mine as I smile down at her. I lean forward to kiss her softly "I would love to join you but my sister is just outside eating waffles." I mumble against her lips. Alice knots her hand in my hair, damping it as I kiss her back leaning over her.

"Alice.." I mumble against her lips. My hand goes to her soaked hair before I shake my head and pull away "I was just going to ask if you were hungry." I say licking my lips. Alice smirks "I am." She says and winks and I splash water at her face "Not like that, though that is good information for the future." I say with a grin. Alice ducks her head under the water before pulling out and shaking her damp hair "Um, sure. I can eat, what are you making?" she asks. I grin. "waffles." I say and Alice laughs at me.

"Sorry, I forgot you can't cook." She teases and I splash her again. "I can cook, now. Get out of this shower, it's not helping my will power." I say and lean forward to kiss her once more before I dip my hands in the water and try to fix my sex hair. I run the hands threw my hair and quickly brush my teeth and walk out to the kitchen to see Ness finishing her plate of waffles.

"Sorry I took so long, Alice was being weird." I mumble and Ness chuckles "Sure, like you weren't making out with her." She says and I chuckle "Eat your food." I say as I look around and find apple juice, ew. I crinkle my nose as I look at Ness "You want apple juice?" I ask. She nods and I walk over hand her the bottle and cup.

She pours herself a cup and drinks it down before sighing as I start eating my plate. "You want some?" she asks and I shake my head "Ew, no. I don't like apple juice." I say and Ness chuckles "So much for being identical, huh?" she asks. I laugh "That and the fact that you still can't charm yourself out of trouble." I say grinning at her ask I take another bite of food.

"I can to, charm myself out of trouble." She says. I smirk "Sure you can." I say around a mouth full of food. "Don't speak with your mouth full." Alice chastens as she walks in. I gulp down my mouthful and take another bite of waffle "Showi." I say with a small smile around my mouthful.

Alice 'glares' at me and I smile as I swallow it down and walk over to her and kiss her cheek "So, moody." I mumble and stop "IF YOU ARE PREGNANT DOES THAT MAKE ME A FATHER!?" I ask loudly turning to look at her. I hear Ness roaring laughter and Alice's stares at me "You are so fucked up, Bella." She says. I shrug and grab a beer from the fridge "Bella, its early for a beer." Alice says. I laugh "Babe, I don't know if you have noticed, its two in the afternoon." I say as I pop the cap off and walk to sit next to ness as I take the last few bites and take a long gulp of my Smirnoff.

I run a hand threw my hair and check my phone. Three e-mails from Jenks. "Mother fucker can't take care of a job for just one damn day." I mumble. "What's a matter Bells?" Alice asks. I sigh. "Three e-mails from Jenks." I say as I start to read them.

I call Jenks and he picks up on the second ring "What's up with you Mr. Grumpy?" I ask as I take a drink of my beer. "I am not grumpy, I am just curious as to how it's going." He says. I smile "it's good." I say nodding to myself. "Now back to business." He says and I groan "No, Jenks. NO, I'm on vacation. Come on! Work with me here." I say standing from my seat and walking to the living room.

"Bella, you knew what you were getting you're self in to when you decided to be part of the company's decisions." He says. I lean my head back, "Jenks, I get that. I really do, but… just give me a few days Jenks. Let me at least enjoy my life." I say. "Bella, there are some things that we just can't… you father knew the sacrifice's this company ensued." He tries.

That's it "I am not my father!" I growl out at him. "Nor will I ever be my father, Jenks. Charlie is dead Jenks, he's gone. I got over it, you should get over it and that fucking company should get over it before I just sell it all!" I growl at him.

The line is silent for a long time as I try to manage my raged breathing "Bella, I'm not comparing you to Charlie." He says softly. "Yes, yes you are. Everyone does. 'Oh, you're father knew what he wanted' your father this and your father that. My father was a dick! He was a jerk, a cold man. I know my father Jenks, maybe you should decide what you want to believe about him. Because I sure as hell don't want to be him!" I yell at Jenks.

My anger blinding me so much I finish the beer and slam the bottle on the coffee table. "Bella…" Jenks starts. "No, Jenks. You listen to me, I will never be my father. Just let that go." I say before I hang the phone up and throw it on the couch.

My anger is still swimming in my head, Charlie. Everything is always comparing me to Charlie. Even he did. You are just like me. We are the same you and me. I put my fingers on my hair. "Bella.." I hear Alice's soft voice and I clench my jaw. Don't snap at her, it's not her fault.

I take a deep breath "If you are going to lecture me, Alice. Save it." I warn not looking at her. "I'm not here to lecture you." she says and I bite back my laugh. I sit on the couch "Why can't people just leave me alone, just fucking leave me alone." I mumble. "Bella… you ok?" I hear Ness asks and my head snaps up to her.

Shit, I forgot Ness was here. "Ness… I… I'm sorry." I mumble and she frowns "For what are you apologizing?" she asks. I stand up quickly needing to use some of this built in energy the fight with Jenks caused "You… you shouldn't share the same point of view about Charlie." I say and she shrugs "I think he's a jerk. Have thought that my whole life, and you are not going to change that. Much to my mother's chagrin." Ness says sitting down on the arm chair.

I sit back down and I feel Alice's hand on my back "What happened?" she asks. "Jenks wants me to go to meetings and do more paper work. I mean, really… I'm going to go pre mature grey with this shit." I mumble not wanting to tell her why I set off. I rest my elbows on my knees and drop my head to my hands "I don't know how to keep doing this." especisly if everything I do will be compared to Charlie. I mumble the beggining under my breath and the last in my mind.

Alice shushes me. "Calm down, you just need a break. Once you get a break you will think clearly." She says. I shake my head "I… I need a shower." I mumble as I stand up, I feel caged. I need air and I feel Alice hold my hand as her eyes look for mine carefully. "Don't shut me out." She says. I give her a week, barely there smile. "I'll be fine, I just need a shower babe." I say and lean forward and kiss the top of her head and nod to Ness. "No hitting on my girl." I warn her as I get in the room and take a shower.

My life, won't ever be easy. That is a fact I have learned to accept.

**Apov**

I lean back on the couch "Well, that was fun." I mumble and Ness throws a pillow at me. I catch it with a chuckle "What was all that about?" she asks. I sigh "Bella, has a hard time when people compare her to her father… especially since she's trying to break that cycle." I say.

Ness nods "She really does hate, Charlie doesn't she?" she asks. I shrug "She doesn't exactly hate him, she admires him a lot. She just… has some resentment towards him." I say to her. Ness nods "Can't really blame her." She says and I chuckle at her as I flip the TV on.

"What you wanna watch?" I ask her. She shrugs "Doesn't matter, I won't be watching the TV." She says with a wink. I stare at her "Would you stop hitting on me." I state. Ness grins.

"Where would the fun be then?" she asks and shifts so that she is sitting at the end of my couch. I grab the pillow and throw it at her and she catches it and puts it on her lap before she chuckles "Don't worry, I'm all bark and no bite." She says. I chuckle "Its creepy how much you and Bella are alike." I say and Ness grins. Our bantering continues untill I say she's as tricky as a fox.

"I feel honored." Says. I chuckle and I hear the door behind us open "It was more an insult then a compliment Ness." Bella says as she jumps over the couch and sits between the two of us. She shove's ness and lays her head on my lap and her legs on Ness lap. "This is conferrable." Bella says, her eyes closed.

I run a hand threw her short hair. Ness chuckles and pats Bella's leg "You are crazy." Ness says and Bella chuckles "I'm crazy? I'm crazy, let's see what's crazy." Bella says grinning as she sits up and puts Ness in a head lock and gives her a nuggy. "I'm around thirteen years behind on bullying you." Bella says laughing. "Dude! My hair, my hair!" Ness says and I laugh as Bella pushes her away.

Ness huffs "Not cool to mess with my hair." She says running a hand threw it. Bella grins at me and my smile grows at the playful ness in her eyes. "GO." Bella say sand we both jump up and Bella grabs Ness in a bear hug wile I start messing up her hair. "Guys! Guys! Come on! Dude! Damn it, Bella let me go!" Ness laughs as Bella starts tickling her.

Finally Bella sighs and lets her go and I jump back as Ness flips her hair back and combs threw it with her fingers. "I'll get you for that, and your little girlfriend two." She says and Bella roars with laughter. "Who dropped a house on your sister?" she asks and then she stops. "Wait… I am your sister… SHIT! Alice hide me from the house." Bella says and hide's her head under my baggy shirt and sighs "I love this view." She states and I push her head out of my shirt.

"Bella, for the love of god. Since when are you all silly?" I ask. She shrugs "I just feel relaxed, fucking finally." Bella sighs as she snuggles on the couch and snorts at what we are watching. "16 and pregnant. Alice, are you trying to send me a message that you want to have a baby with me. Cuz, babe. I think we are missing a few parts for that to work." Bella teases and I hear Ness snort and guffaws a laugh.

I chuckle at Bella, "Shut up and change the channel." I say and Bella shrugs and hands the control to Ness and she picks some crazy movie.

I sigh as I run a hand through Bella's hair. It's incredible to see her so relaxed, so laid back and… young. This… I can get used to this.

**A/N: long chapter, kinda. Enough for everyone. So, Review!**


	73. Chapter 73

**A/N: hey guys sorry for the long wait, horrible week. And the doc says my wrist is sprained, donut may take longer than usual to publish. Idk, let's see how it goes.**

**I do not own twilight!**

**Ch.73**

**Bpov**

Relaxation was never something that came easy to me. I mean, I know how to relax. But my old methods involved drugs, alcohol, sex or violence. So... to feel utterly relaxed as Alice is running her hands threw my hair and Ness is laying on the opposite couch watching TV with me at my house in Forks... it's... an out of body moment.

Two days ago we came back to forks, and to no one's shock Ness and Clare wanted to buy a house here. At first I had been furious at the thought of Clare walking down the same streets my parents had fallen in love with. The idea of her visiting my father's grave... it made my stomach churn.

But... then Alice reminded me that maybe Ness would like to live closer to me. Get to know me better and maybe even visit her father's grave... well, it crumpled my anger a bit much. I mean, who was I to just... claim Forks as my land. And hell, if she wanted to come here and live in my town... we would rule it together. Metaphorically, I had Alice now. The tittle gave me no use, now. But hey, at least I could make sure Ness didn't miss anything.

But, no. You want to hear the part that had me almost so pissed that I wanted to punch the wall? Clare, yeah... she is just five minutes away on car. Ten minutes away on foot. She lives on the first houses before my lane. Now that... that was pushing everything a bit close to me. I mean, I get accidentally re opening the wound. But, pouring salt, lime juice and spilling lemonade on the face of the cut isn't exactly a smart thing to do. So, I got pissed. I took my frustrations out on my punching bag and then on Alice's body. More gently but, ehh, same things apply.

I CALMED DOWN DIDNT I! Well then... hmmph.

I unthread Alice's hands from my hair and look up lazily at her. I kiss her wrist "Don't you miss your family?" I ask suddenly. I just remembered that she's been in my house for two weeks. Not that I mind. "Not that I don't want you here, I just don't want to worry them or you." I say quickly and I hear Ness chuckle at something on the TV.

"I... I'm not really sure... I mean... yeah, I miss them. I miss talking with Rose and hanging out with my bro's but... I'm not going back if my dad is still being unreasonable to you." Alice says. I shake my head "No, baby. Don't make me a reason for fighting in your family. We have been through this." I mumble as I trace a line along her jaw. She sighs "Why do you always make this conversation happen?" she asks. I shrug "I don't want you to end up without a family because of me. We are back together, and I don't think anyone will believe that we have been two weeks in my house and that we aren't back together. Trust me, I love having you here and you can stay here as long as you want. But... maybe it would be nice if you visited them, they must miss you." I say feeling the corners of my lips pull down.

"Doooon't. Don't do that, puppy, sad, adult...stop looking at me like that!" Alice begs. I let my eyes burn in to her and I feel my hand trail down her jaw slowly "You miss them." I whisper licking my lips before I continue "They miss you; if they start anything you can come right back and I won't ask you to leave ever again. But... I think you owe it to them to give them a second chance." I mumble. Alice's eyes almost flutter closed when I trail down her jaw and then they melt as I lick my lips.

That mixed with my words and eyes... let's just say, she kissed me. Hard, and I loved it. WE start kissing intensely and before long I hear Ness start to say "Will you two stop sucking face, I can barely concentrate at the sound of Alice moaning every twenty seconds. I swear." she says and I laugh in to the kiss with Alice. Laughing so much I can't even move my lips to Alice's as I laugh in to her neck. I can see Alice's blush and I laugh harder.

"Ness, control please." I say between soft chuckles and I run a hand threw my hair as Alice stares at me seriously. I send her a soft smile "Oh, come on I was joking." I say and she rolls her eyes. "So, this may or may not be invasive. But... how did you two meet?" Ness asks us. I feel a smile tug at my lips "Well... we met in Spanish class." I say with a giddy smile. I feel my eyes zone out for a sec as the memory hits me.

"I remember, I had woken up to a normal day, I even had plans to hook up with a chick that night." I say with a grin and Alice elbows me. I chuckle "anyway, I walk to my Spanish class, were I would just sleep and see that there is someone sitting next to me. Ness, you have to understand something about Forks high. As much as I may be popular, people are scared of me. So when I would ask for my space, no one sat next to me. So I was a bit shocked to see a girl, a hot girl who I had never seen sitting right next to my seat. And... As soon as I saw her, I knew that I wanted her." I say with a small smile.

Alice hits my arm "You make me sound like an object." she says. I chuckle as I kiss her arm "What, baby. I'm saying you were hot that I wanted you on the spot." I say against her skin. She shakes her head "Well, when I saw you I almost fainted." she admits blushing. I grin as I sit to the side to pay attention to Alice's point of view.

"I remember getting to the class early and the teacher telling me to take a seat in the back. I took the one away from the vent and people started to pile in. You got there late, if I remember correctly. And I remember looking up and seeing you walk in slowly and then you stupid glasses that covered you're eyes. I saw a smirk cover your lips and you just... you used arrogance, danger, confidence and sexuality. Even the way you walked over to your seat looked sexual. I had to start drawing to take my mind of you. Then you just had to take the seat next to me and just smile at me and introduce yourself. I did so in return with my heart beating a mile a minute. I just remember repeating in my mind 'I have never seen a girl this hot' over and over." Alice says.

I grin to myself as I wait for her to keep telling me her side of things. "Then when you commented on my drawing... shit, I swear she was like so... diferent then everyone else. She sounded like an adult, talking. It was so... enthralling. I couldn't understand how someone who was obvious my same age... acted and sounded so mature. Then, she flirted. Then she comforted me about being bullied... then she sort of... ignored me. More or less and I would see her kissing with other people. Then one day... it all changed. She gave me a ride to her house in the storm and we talked... I got to know how... um, private. she was and she did this crazy trick with-" I cut her off.

"Ness does not need to know about what I did to make you thing about me. She doesn't need to know I got you all flustered over nothing." I say with a grin. Alice chuckles and leans forward "GOD you are so annoying, why am I still with you?" she asks her lips a centimeters away from mine. I smirk "Because I'm rich, great in bed, know your body better than a blind person knows brail and I have a hot body." I say mirth playing in my eyes.

Alice knots a hand in my hair and kisses me chastely before pushing me away from her. Growl... I love an aggressive Alice. My eyes shine with something else but Alice gets off the couch. "Well, I need a shower. You two try not to learn anything from the other." she says before she walks away up the stairs.

I grin to myself as she walks behind the door out of Ness view and flashes me her breasts. What a tease! She walks away and I sigh and relax in to the couch. I look to Ness to see her studying my family portrait. I grimace "You know... I hate that picture just as much as I love it." I say to her. She shifts to look at me and raises an eyebrow "Why do you hate it?" she asks in a small voice.

I smirk a bit, "For years I just thought it represented a perfect family... now. Now I can see the lie in it, all the cracks in the mask -so to speak. I can finally see the lie's behind the smile. And... even worse, that the lie I thought I saw it in, was only a scratch to the true one." I say with a small glare to the painting. My mother's smiling face, my father's small smirk, my innocent smirk. I clench my jaw tightly, what a joke of a family.

"Why do you love it?" Ness asks her voice just as soft. Not wavering from looking at me, my face softens a bit but I can still feel the bitter taste the anger left on my mouth. I take a long drink of my beer. "It's the only thing I have that reminds me of before everything got screwed up. It was a year before my mom died... a few years before everything became too much for me. And... I like the lie. The fake smiles on this painting...give me hope, that maybe they weren't all lies." I admit, swirling the contents of the bottle.

"Bell..." ness whispers. I chuckle as I bring the bottle up to my lips and run a hand threw my hair roughly. I place a fake mask of indifference "Oh, well. Doesn't really matter now, there both dead." I say with a shrug as I stand up grabbing the empty bottle with me. "YOU thirsty?" I ask Ness.

She shakes her head and I nod as I walk to the kitchen and grab a new beer. I walk back to the living room to see Ness looking at the pictures over the fire place. "He was really sick, wasn't he." she states rather then asks. I nod "Stomach cancer. By the time they located it, it had spread to his liver, and his chest. And the chemo wasn't helping. After a while... there wasn't much left to do but wait until he gave out." I say my voice sounding dead even to me.

Ness looks at me from over her shoulder, a confused expression on her face "How can you...?... how can you speak without... don't you feel anything when you speak about Charlie?" she asks sounding a bit shocked. I smirk "Of course I do, I have just learned to cope with loss and death threw my whole life. While you, have only coped with what? Charlie's death? maybe a grandparent's death?" I ask.

Ness shakes her head "how can you just... switch flips like that? one second your warm and funny the next your cold and hard." Ness states confused. I frown as I take a drink of my beer. "I... I don't mean to do it. It's just who I am. You're still young and good and sweet, Ness... I'm not like that. I'm cold and dark and broken. My mind is as much as my enemy then it is an ally." I say running a hand threw my hair.

"I know we haven't known each other for too long, Bella. But... were family. We are all that is left of Charlie. We are the last Swan's there will be and read or not. We are a family. I'm here because I want to get to know you, I want to know about the sister I have always wondered about. The girl I thought would never know I existed. And I'm so close!... I can see you, right there. But there's like this... this huge wall up and I don't have the first clue how to break it down! or even how to get through it." she exclaims.

I stand up "Ness, calm down. I don't mean to come off like this, I'm trying. I'm freaking trying, but you have to understand. It took me months, to just get used to talking or being near Alice. I was alone for years Ness. And I don't mean 3. I mean I have been alone since I was around ten. My dad... shut down after that. He wouldn't speak to me unless I asked it of him and the only time he snapped out of it was when some really fucked up shit happened to me. And even after that, he continued to go back to his own world." I try to explain.

"I'm used to being alone and conserved. And the way I coped with a lot of things aren't exactly the right way, Ness. But I promise you, right here and right now. I am not going anywhere. I just got a peace of family back, and I'll be damned if anyone or anything fucks with my life any longer. Ok? I just got you. And ill protect you, and take care of you. And I'll be the best fucking sister I can ever be and more. Just give me time, to get used to this. You had your whole life to get used to being a little sister. I've had two weeks, but I'll get there." I promise her as I step forward and duck down to her height and look in her eyes.

My hands holding her neck so that she can look straight at me. "There is no wall in me that applies to you. Ok? None, that wall you think you feel. Is just a lot of suppressed anger. And it's not directed to you, it's to Charlie. He chose to leave me alone, for years. When I could have had a family, something to rely on. When Charlie died, I was lost kid. I was seriously and badly lost. Alice snapped me out of it. And now I have you. And it's terrifying to know that I have to worry about another person, but just because it's you, Ness... it makes it worth it." I say a small smile hinting at my lips.

"Want it or not... you're stuck with me kid. For life, were all that's left. You better start getting used to having a big sister for real this time. I'm not planning on going anywhere." I say with a small smirk. Ness smiles timidly at me. I grin and she goes and hugs me. I stiffen for a second before I hug her back. My arms tightly around her and her head ducked on my shoulder and my head against the top of hers.

Ill protect you Ness. Just like I protect Alice. Just give me time. I hold her for a long moment before I pull away and look at her before I ruffle her hair. "DUDE!" Ness groans pushing me away. I jump out of her way with a grin "Dude!" I mock her. She fixes her hair and fixes a glare at me, ha! she calls that a glare!

"you call that a glare?" I ask laughing. She frowns. "yeah." she states. I shake my head "wow, I need to teach you how to glare. That's kinda sad, kid." I say as I walk over to her. "You're a Swan, keep your head straight and chin up. Your rich, you're smart, you're grace, you're power." I say to her as I tilt her chin up a bit. Straighten her posture. Position her arms tensely along her sides and fix her stance.

I grin at her "Now, glare. Tense your whole body, like you're ready to hit someone. And glare at them as if you are looking down at them. Use the burning eyes, only add anger. Yes, just like that." I say and suppress a small laugh. "you look like an angry kitty." I mumble and Ness deflates and glares at me. I roar with laughter but duck out of her way as she dashes over to me.

I jump on the couch cushion and jump over the back and land smooth on my feet behind the couch looking at Ness over my shoulder. "Catch me if ya can." I say and dash out of the living room. I hear her footsteps behind me as I dash up the steps. I'm around the middle of the stairs when I feel Ness hand on my wrist and she holds me. I stop and look at her and do the 'glare' she lets go in an instant and I smirk. "That's how you do it." I say and run down the steps just in time for her to snap out of her shock.

"Bella! you scared the crap out of me!." she chastens as she runs down he steps. She almost trips on the last step and I grab her arm and hold her up. "Damn, I sure as hell don't miss being clumsy." I comment and ness huffs "Stupid ugly duck faze." she mumbles. I crack a smile "Nice name for it." I say. She shrugs "I think I'm getting less clumsy, this is the first time I trip in two days." she says.

I nod "Nice." I state with a grin. Ness grins up at me and I realize that she's still kinda dangling from my arm. I help her up and she stares at me "How are you so skinny and strong?" she asks. I smirk "I kick box, I like sports. Also... I'm just verry... active." I say and Ness frowns. "I like to work out." I explain and she nods "oh, you could have just said that." she says.

I shrug, I could have said that. But it's the reason why I work out so much that I don't want to tell her.

Just then I hear a soft giggle and when I look up I see Alice walking down the steps her hair wet and plastered around her. Fresh out of the shower "You two are just adorable. I could hear you two from our room." Alice says and I beam at the mention of 'our' room. I kiss her cheek, as she gets over to us and she looks at me. "Don't teach her shit, Bell. She has the chance to be the decent Swan." she says with a wink and I shrug.

"Like you didn't show Eddie do a lot of shit" I say and she stares at me. "I did, why do you think I'm telling you not to. Em showed me a lot of things that I could have done better without." she says with a small shudder. I laugh "Riiiight, act like the victim. Like you didn't enjoy the time he showed you gay porn." I say and Ness roars with laughter as we all walk back to the living room.

"Shut up! I was still in the closet back then." she says. I laugh "Hun, your life is in the closet. Clothes and shoes. If I gave you a mall does that mean you will love me forever?" I ask, feigning excitement. Alice rolls her eyes at me. "You are a waste of brain with a pretty face." she says in fake seriousness as she kisses my cheek before lying down and just staring at the TV.

"I love you." Alice whispers. I smile at her. "I love you, Ali." I whisper and we kiss quickly before settling back on the TV.

**Apov**

The rest of the afternoon passes quickly and before long it's time for Renesmee to return home, Bella going to drop her off quickly before returning.

I smile softly and shake my head. It's so very… surreal watching Bella with Ness. Even if their relationship isn't exactly conventional and even if Bella's still settling into everything, she's every inch the older sister when it comes to Ness.

I never thought that she would have had this side to her, and… I liked it. I liked it a lot. She was younger with Ness and it showed. Yes, she was different with me than everyone else but we were closer to the same age and it wasn't the same. With Ness she was still older than her, true, but she connected to that – drew on that sense of youth and…

I rolled my eyes, a wry smile on my lips. The world may truly have a limited number of days because Ness was the closest thing possible to Bella's clone – and one of Bella was infinitely more than enough. Their smile, their smirk, their charm… It was all the same. The Swan Charm, Bella called it. Well, sometimes it was okay to have a little less charm, I thought. Still, I couldn't deny that I loved all of those things on Bella. And her eyes… oh, God, those eyes… I shuddered and then looked up as the sound of a door opening and shutting broke through my thoughts.

I glanced towards the door to see Bella entering and a smile spread automatically on my face, although there was concern in my eyes, as well. I could guarantee that no one else would have noticed, but I had – Bella was tired.

I stood and walked to her, bringing one of my hands up and cupping her cheek, kissing her softly in greeting before pulling back. She looked at me questioningly and I smiled softly.

"You're tired," I stated quietly and she grimaced slightly but nodded. I took her hand in mine. "Come on, let's go take a nap, okay?" I asked, not waiting for an answer as I pulled up the stairs and to our room.

I grinned massively at the thought. I was absolutely giddy every time that I got to refer to it as_our _room. It was an incredible feeling and I couldn't help but savor it.

Once upstairs and in the bedroom, I turned to face her but Bella surprised me by yanking me into her arms and moving forward to lay me on the bed, climbing in after me.

I turned over to face her. "Bella?" I questioned making her raise one eyebrow lazily.

"Yes, Volkova?" she asked, yawning slightly and I shook my head. I expected her to argue and put up some sort of fight but she didn't. She obviously knew what I was thinking since she chuckled and shook her head. "I'm not gonna argue this time. I am pretty worn out so let's just get some rest, no?" she questioned softly, that slight Spanish accent (that I loved) showing through. I smiled and turning my back to her, waiting until she wrapped one arm around my waist and pulled me to her warm body.

I grinned sleepily, the warmth of Bella surrounding me making me drowsy.

"Goodnight, Bella," I said quietly and she placed a kiss on the top of my head, chuckling softly.

"Good night, beautiful." That was the last sound I heard as I drifted to sleep in the arms of my love.


	74. Chapter 74

**A/N: Well, I'm happy to know you all like the last chap. Now, here is the next one, obvi. Hope it's for the long wait, my computer is a bitch and decided to just shut down, when i re opened it. Everything having to do with Microsoft Office was whipped from my computer. No word, power point, exel. Nada, sucks. **

**I don't own twilight. **

**Ch. 74**

**Apov**

I woke up to a cold bed. At first I had just brushed it of as Bella being in the bathroom or out for a smoke. But... after a few minutes she didn't come back and as I made my way out of the bathroom I heard something hard drop on the lower floor with a thud. I launched out of bedroom, tripping a hand full of times as I walk down the steps and fallow the noise to the study. I open the door to see Bella launch a book to the other side of the wall. It clashes against a picture and if falls to the ground with a smash. I hear her voice sound tired and angry.

"No Jenks! You keep the press out of this town!" I hear her growl to her head peace. I stop at the door, not wanting to scare her. An angry and scared Bella was the horrible mix to this whole thing. "I want to get to know her! I don't want her to become a puppet for this stupid press!" Bella says darkly to Jenks. "Tell them the rumors aren't true, easy as that. You learn to lie, Jenks. You must know how that feels right? You lie." her voice growls out. I take a weak step back at the hidden furry in her tone.

"Hahaha, you want me to go to Italy? Jenks, I have an office right here in Seattle. I don't go there because those pricks annoy me. I fixed all the problems out in Italy, and then I left you in charge for a month. One month, it's not that hard man." Bella says her voice sounding tired. "No, you know what... fine. Fine, just... send me the paper work. I'll just look threw them, no it's ok. Just... just send me the paper work. I'll get it back to you as soon as I can." Bella's soft, exhausted voice says threw the phone.

I step back to the door to see Bella's slumped figure against a book case. Her head tilted to rest up against the books and she looks completely miserable. I feel my heart give a squeeze. I walk hesitantly in the office to see that it's in shambles. Books scattered, frames broken papers everywhere. Shit... "Bella." my voice says softly. She makes no notice that she heard me. "Bells, are you alright babe?" I ask softly. I see Bella gulp and her head shifts down so that she can stare at me.

Her eyes stare threw me, dark with misery and it cuts me. It cuts me deep. "Bells." I say and walk over to her and kneeling next to her. "Sorry if I woke you up." she mumbles, her voice tired, raspy. I run a hand threw her hair "You didn't, I woke up all on my own. I got scared when I didn't feel you in bed, since when have you been up... and arguing with Jenks?" I ask.

She smirks a bit and checks her watch "Um... since four Am." she says. My eyes go wide, its eight am. "You've been up for four hours arguing with Jenks?" I ask. She shrugs "It's nothing new." she mumbles and her eyes close. I sigh "My pour girl, you look so tired." I mumble. She smiles a bit, the smile not reaching her eyes. "I'm good." she mumbles. "Bullshit, baby. Come on, let's leave the wreck of this office and let me get some food in you." I say and she stands with a sigh.

We walk to the kitchen and Bella sits down and slumps her head against the counter, I can tell she is exhausted... but it goes more than physical exhaustion... its emotional too. "Babe... you doing ok?" I ask softly as I take some eggs out of the fridge. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" she asks. I stay for a second and look at her "You are definitely not ok, Bells. Tell me, don't hide from me." I say. Once I speak I know I used the wrong word, there is nothing Bella hates more than to hear that she is hiding.

She clenches her jaw tightly "Ali, it's not hiding. It's me not wanting to talk when I am pissed, because I don't want to snap at you." Bella says slowly, her voice wavering beneath her anger. I purse my lips and walk over to her; I know how to make her mood better. I hug her from behind, my front pressed up against her back. I push my lips against her neck and slide my hands over her arms until my hands are on her hands holding her against the counter.

"I think I can take some anger." I tease. It's true, when it comes to Bella's sexual appetite. Her anger turns quickly in to passion and I can handle every single drop of passion this girl can give. I hear her groan softly at the back of her throat and I kiss her neck with a bit more pressure, opening my lips and letting my tongue dart out. Bella try's to slide her hands off mine but I smack them back to the counter forcefully. As much as Bella loves to be in control, I don't thing an angry sex hungry Bella would do much fun in control. "Bad, Bella. You do as I say." I mumble softly against her ear before licking the shell lightly.

A soft moan escapes her lips "Al... don't." she mumbles and I nibble at her neck. I feel her shift and before I know it she has ME pinned. How the hell does she do that?! "How the hell do you do that?" I mumble as I pull away from her lips. She kisses my jaw, her body pushing mine against the kitchen island. "I'm good at fucking." she growls against my lips as she crashes her lips against mine. I knot a hand threw her hair but... she's still tense and she's being a bit more ruff then I like.

"Bella, baby. Gentle." I mumble softly and I feel Bella stop for a moment. I feel her lean her head on my shoulder, what? What did I do? "Bella, I didn't want you to stop. I was just wondering if you could be a bit gentler." I say and I hear her chuckle. "Don't worry, Ali. I get you." she mumbles before I feel her lips on my neck. After she's done kissing my neck she brushes her lips slowly against mine "I get you... the only question is, am I willing to give in to you." she says before she pulls me closer to her body.

I feel her hand suddenly freeze before she pulls away from me, putting around arms length between us. "Um, I... I apologize Alice. I'm sorry I don't know what... I'm sorry." Bella mumbles before she tries to walk away but I grab her arm and pull her to me forcefully. "Don't apologize, I started it." I say looking in her eyes. I smile at her "Besides... I'm always open to someone other than me doing the fucking." I tease. Ok, it's a lie. Bella is the one that does the fucking, I do the cumming. Ha! That rimed. Oh, I also do the love making.

Bella chuckles and brushes my nose with hers "We both know who does the fucking, beautiful." Bella says pulling my hips to hers and hitching my leg on her hip. As soon as she has me hanging form her she walks to the table she has in the corner and sits me on it. She immediately separates my legs so that our cores can brush and she thrust her hips against mine.

I whimper at the feeling that spreads threw me. A new longing hunger running threw my whole body. Bella thrusts her hips against mine again before her lips reach mine in a searing kiss that leaves me breathless and tingly. The effects this girl has on me, it's crazy. She slows down the kiss until it's painfully slow. She runs her hands up and down my back from under my shirt. After around four minutes of just kissing she pulls away from me biting her lip and looking at me before she shakes her head. "Not today babe." Bella says before walking over to the fridge and taking out the milk and serving herself a bowl of cereal. I do the same and we eat on silence, frustrated silence on my part.

"Going to tell me what's up, or am I going to have to guess?" I ask after I finish. She sighs "Work, work and more work." she says. I role my eyes, "Baby, nothing pulls you out of sex. So I know something big is wrong." I say a bit worried. I mean, its Bella. Sex is like breathing for her. Bella finishes her bowl and drops it in the sink with a bang "Not everything revolving my life is sex, Alice! I'm not that person anymore, sex doesn't influence my every action." she says her voice sounding odd... off. Like she's trying to tell someone who won't listen to her. It's like she's speaking to a child.

"Bella... I know sex isn't the most important thing for you but... babe, you're a sexual person. Maybe even a sex addict, I don't know. And I really don't mind, but come on. Don't you think it's a tad odd that you have like this... undying hunger for sex?" I ask her. She stares at the white wall of the kitchen for a long moment. She surprises me by chuckling, but the sound instead of making me feel relax. Makes a shiver run down my spine, the sound is so hollow, it's scary. Did I really just piss her off by that? I mean, I was just stating a fact!

Her eyes shift from the wall to land on me and the look in them, makes me stop cold. Her eyes are so... dark. Not as in they look black, they always look black. I mean as in, her eyes actually look a tad evil. "Bella..." I say softly. Her eyes slowly re focus some light in them, but the evil doesn't vanish it's just submersed by fire.

"I'm not that person anymore." she states looking at me. I lift my hands a bit "I never said you were, I was just saying a simple small fact." I say. Her jaw clenches "Good, because the last thing I need is another comparison, you God knows how many I've had to handle for today.." she says in a clipped tone before she looks in the sink. "Leave the dishes, I'll get to them soon enough." she states before she walks out of the kitchen. I stay there with an odd sensation of mental whiplash.

"Bella! Bella, babe I'm sorry!" I call after her as I walk after her. I want her to relax; I don't want to get her in a worse mood. I see her stop at the top of the stairs, her shoulders stiff. I stop at the end of the stair case. "Bella, what's gotten in to you? You know I didn't mean to compare you." I say softly. "Nothing, Alice. Can't you just drop it?" she asks exasperated. I huff "No, I won't just drop it. Just because Jenks put you in a piss ass mood doesn't mean I'm open to take the heat for it." I snap back at her. She shakes her head and roughly runs a hand threw her hair, sending the short spikes to go everywhere and fall on her face. "I just need space. I need people to give me space and stop playing with my mind before I lose it! Space, just a bit of space to breathe and think. Is that too much to ask for?" she asks slowly. Her voice still holding on to anger, but she speaks slowly as in to not yell at me.

I sigh; I think my heart just broke. She wants... space from us? From me? Is this her way of breaking up with me again? "No, it's not. I guess... I'll get out of your hair then." I mumble dejectedly trying to ignore the sting her words left on me. I feel my eyes tear up as I walk to the hook and slide on a jacket. I hear rushed footsteps on the stairs and just as I open the front door the door is slammed close. "Alice, Alice, I didn't mean it like that. I don't want a break from you and me. Ok? I didn't mean it that way. I'm sorry, I didn't think about what I said. I didn't mean that I want a break from us, ok? Not form us baby." Bella says her hands coming immediately to my face to cup my head in her hands making me look at her.

Her face looking reassuring yet panicked at the thought I had in my head. I let my breath let out shakily and Bella pulls me to her and kisses the top of my head "No, Alice... how could you ever thing I need space from us? We just got back together. No, baby. No my sweet angel, I can't live without you." Bella whispers softly to me. Her strong form holding me to her and I snuggle in to her neck trying to calm down the relief I felt after the panic. "I'm sorry." I mumble and Bella just pulls me tighter against her. "No, I am. I'm sorry I'm in a bad mood, I don't know why I let the comparisons get to me so much... they just tick me off now." she mumbles.

I pull away from her neck to see her eyes looking at the ground and I cup her cheek "I didn't mean to compare you with your old self Bells... you know that right?" I ask. She nods "I know... I just... I... I have this crazy irrational fear that... that I'm going to end up like Charlie now. That this... that you is all this huge fucking dream and that ill wake up and be alone again. Charlie ruined his own chance of happiness so many times... I just can't bear the thought." Bella admits.

I look in to her eyes and see that her eyes are a bit spaced. Like she's just thinking out loud. I touch her cheek and she snaps back "Come back to me." I mumble and her lips twitch in a sad smile "Always." is her answer. She kisses my palm "I just... got lost in my thoughts." she admits bashfully. I chuckle and kiss her cheek "Why don't you go up to the office and do some paper work and ill join you and keep you from going mad?" I ask. Bella ducks her head to my shoulder. I kiss her temple and with a sigh Bella gets of me and walks slowly up the steps.

"Nice but." I comment as I make my way to the kitchen and I hear Bella soft laugh as she walks up the stairs. As soon as I make a cup of coffee for Bella and herbal tea for me (caffeine makes me hyperactive, more so then usual.) I walk up to the office to hear Bella muttering to herself about size and re crease and permanent placement for a fund in Korea. Something along those lines.

I place the cup of Coffee and an empty of paper peace of the desk and Bella gives me a soft smile and I laugh at the week attempt. I sit on her lap when she motions for it and she works smoothly with me on her lap. Oh, trust me. I would have loved to clean up the study while Bella worked but she wouldn't let me. She told me to please just sit on her lap and she just stayed with one arm around my waist. By the end of the long files of papers Bella speed read I was sitting on her lap chucking at her muttering to herself.

By the end of this whole thing I ended up dictating the files to her while she nodded her head scribbling away on a paper. After about two hours of us just working Bella groans and takes her phone out when it rings. "Give me a sec Ali." she says before she answers the phone. "Bella Swan." she states. I chuckle at her and I see her search threw files "One second, I just had that paper in my hands." she says and searches threw a big stack taking out a peace of pink paper. "Yes, I got it... no, no mention of the cost in the fuel." she says. "Wait, one second. This file doesn't go to me, it goes to John in transportation." she states. "I'll get back to you, sir. One second." she says before she hangs up and calls someone else. I stand from Bella's lap and she leans back and she speaks "John? Yes, this is me Bella Swan. Ha-ha, yes, its me. It's a pleasure. Yes, I just came to inform you that your correspondence is coming directly to me." she says.

There is a long pause "Ok, sure. Thank you for your time, keep up the great work." She says before she hangs up and switches her computer on. "What are you doing?" I ask her. She looks up "Um, forwarding his e-mails to him and then blocking the sender from my account." she says and I nod as she works away in her computer. I stand up and kneel down next to the pile of books and stack them and pick them up. Bella starts to protest but I ignore her as I start putting them in the book case. She sighs and continues to scribble away and make phone calls until the paper stack was no more. Bella stands from her seat and grabs the huge stack of papers and calls up a number of UPS. She slips the papers in a yellow envelope and scribbles something on the outside.

"Good bye fucker." she says as the delivery man drives away. She closes the door and looks at me for a long moment; I look away from her eyes uncertain. I feel her arm around my waist as she hugs me, "Have I told you that I love you, today?" she asks. I smile "I don't think you have." I muse. She kisses my cheek, my jaw, my nose, my eye lid, temple, forehead, and chin and then thought, every time saying I love you. When she reaches my lips she whispers "I will love you forever." before she touches her lips to mine. I smile against her lips "You are such an enigma." I say against her lips kissing her back.

Her arm wraps around my hips and she pulls me to her "Doesn't it keep things interesting?" she muses and I hit her shoulder and we laugh. "You make my life worth living." she admits staring at my eyes. My face goes blank "What about Ness, you have her now." I say. A small smile touches her lips "You where the one that made me look beyond my anger and hurt to actually seek her out." she says. I shake my head "You would have sought her out on your own. Want to or not Bella, you love and you want to be loved. Nothing would have kept you from Ness for long." I say as I pull away from her and she smiles at me a bit.

Her grin becoming her usual sexy grin, which I loooove. "Come here." I say as I sit on the couch. Bella walks over to me slowly and straddles my lap as I lay down. "I love you." I say and she smiles at me. "I love you." she says and with a kiss... our moment is ruined by my phone. I groan "What does a girl have to do to get laid." I mumble and Bella laughs handing me my phone "Hello?" I ask. "Alice, this is your mother. I was wondering if you and Bella would like to come over for lunch." she says.

I look at Bella 'lunch with mom?' I mouth. She nods "Sure, thing." i say. "Oh, great. It starts in half an hour, hope its enough time. We just decided to make a picnic seeing as the they got sunny." she says. I smile "And before you ask, yes. I have asked your siblings to behave. They have no aversion to Bella anymore." she says. "What about-" im cut off by mom. "A bit more persuading and he will be all for it." she says. I laugh "We will be over soon." I say and mom says something to someone before talking to e "Great, I can't wait." before she hangs up. I frown and Bella kisses my thought and I throw the phone on the coffee table. "We have half an hour." I mumble against Bella's lips. She smirks "half an hour?... I can make you climax five times in half an hour." she says and I ignore the clench my core gives. "But... I take half an hour to get ready." I say slowly. Bella kisses up my jaw "And to get dressed... you first have to undress." she hisses the 's' like a snake. "And then take a long relaxing shower, with me... I don't think your parents would mind if you get there a bit late. We can always blame my lack of desire to visit." she says her soft hand slipping my shirt up and up until its off.

My hand goes to her hair and she ducks her head to kiss the swell of my breast "be fast." I mumble with a short gasp. She smiles against my breast, I can feel it. "My pleasure." she says and quickly she yanks her shirt off throwing it to the other couch before slipping off my pants and underwear. She puts one leg between mine "Moan." she whispers and when I'm about to make a snappy come back, you know what happens? she bite's my nipple! I throw my head back in a moan and she lifts from my body holding herself up, looking down at me. Her eyes hungry, then she smirks.

**Bpov**

I walk out of the steaming bathroom fully dressed in a blue button down shirt, black jeans, boots, and my hair crazy looking. I lick my lips with a small grin of pride for myself as I wait until Alice walks out, un dressed, on shaky legs. "Ha, and you said I couldn't make you come five times in half an hour." I say walking to the mirror to look at myself. I look good.

I look at my watch "Alice, were going to be late. I told you to get dressed." I say with a grin. Alice glares at me, but her lips turn in to a smile "Will you shut up, I can barely feel my legs. I think I'm going to be walking bow legged for the rest of the day." she says. I laugh and walk over to her and kneel down and kiss her thy "Aww, my pour baby." I say against her thy.

"Are you sore?" I ask looking up at Alice. She nods and I lean forward and place a soft kiss at her mound and Alice hand tangles in my hair. I laugh softly before I pull away and stand "Whoa, tiger. Calm down, if you want went we get back from 'Princess Carlisle's.' I will give you a nice soothing leg rub, ok? And besides, you won't walk bow legged. You only think that cuz you're clit is still sensitive." I say and Alice whacks me with a pillow.

I laugh "You mature enough to have sex and talk dirty but when I get technical you get all closed up. Baby, you are one messed up chick." I say laughing. "Go fuck you're self, Bell." she says. I smirk "I would but I already changed underwear." I say and she flips me off before walking to the dresser and slipping on some cotton pink underwear. A matching light pink bra and then slips on one of her pink, cute Alice like blouse, with one of her Jeans. She fixes her hair quickly and then looks at me while she applies make up.

"You don't need that, you know." I say as I walk over and put on some perfume. "I do, cuz, if you forgot. I have around six hicky's on my neck, one on my jaw and I have bags under my eyes." she says. "God forbid, your mother doesn't think I don't let you sleep, bowleg." I comment and laugh when she hits me. "Don't call me that." she says and I laugh as I hug her from behind. "I was joking baby, you look fine. You always look beautiful." I say and she sticks her tongue out at me before applying eyeliner to herself.

She turns and puts eyeliner on me and I frown "I hate make up." I mumble. "Hush." Alice says as she starts playing Bella Barbie. I'm fine with it until she wants to put on eye shadow and lip stick. That is where I draw the line. I pull away from her "No, not a chance. Babe. You're the girly girl in this relationship." I say. "What? the big bad butch is afraid of eye shadow?" She teases.

I laugh "Not afraid, I just don't like the stuff. Besides, I will be wearing these." I say and reach for my sunglasses. I hear Alice groan "Nooo, come on Bella. I hate those." she says. I frown "Why do you hate them so much, they look freaking cool." I say. She sighs and leans against the dresser "I can't see your eyes." she says. I raise an eyebrow "Babe, you just spend the last half an hour staring at my eyes." I remind her.

She rolls her eyes and slides on a pair of sunglasses, hiding her hazel eyes. I frown "Oh." I say when I realize what she means. We can't have those silent conversations with our eyes. "Yeah, oh." she says sliding them off. I sigh and hang them from my shirt. "Come on babe, we can have millions of those conversations just with a smile." I say and she sighs.

I snicker and kiss her soft delectable lips until my phone buzzes in my pocket. I reach for it, still kissing Alice. "Hello?" I ask before I reconnect my lips and Alice's. "Bella? it's me, Ness." Ness says and I pull away from Alice's lips. "Oh, hey Ness. what's up?" I ask and send a small smile to Alice. She smiles back and turns to keep on with her make up things.

"Well, I was wondering if you were free to hang out. Mom left to give resumes out and I'm bored cuz I don't know anyone." she says. I smile but then I frown "Oh, um. Give me one sec." I say and mute the phone. "Alice... how um... disappointed would you be if I... didn't show up at lunch thing." I say softly. Alice stares at me "Very, why? don't tell me you're not going Bella. Come on, I thought you decided to try and start out fresh with my family." she says staring at me.

I sigh "I know, but Ness is like all alone in her house and her mom isn't around and she doesn't know anyone in town." I say and Alice face goes blank "Then why not just tell her to come with us?" she asks. I frown and Alice rolls her eyes "MY father may be a jerk to you, Bella. But he's not evil." she says. I nod "I know I just... fine. I'll ask her. But one rude comment out of your father directed to Ness and I am leaving Alice. I will pick you up afterwards but I will leave if he provokes me or says anything he shouldn't to ness." I say.

She smiles and kisses my lips quickly "Such a turn on when you get so protective." she says before walking to our closet. I smile and shake my head "Um, hey Ness." i say and Ness speaks "So, what's up?" she asks. I smile "How do you feel about meeting Alice's family. There cool, except for her dad but he won't say a word to you." I say. She is quiet for a long time "Um, I guess that's better than nothing. What's the dress code?" she asks. I laugh "Semi formal." I say and she nods "Cool. I'll be ready in five." she says. I nod "Sweet, I'll pick you up soon." is ay and after that we hang up.

I bite my lip "You sure your mom won't mind if I bring Ness?" I ask Alice. She walks out of the closet with shoes on her feet "Babe, mom makes more than enough food to feed a small army. I think one more person is a great idea." she says and kisses my lips "And besides, I'm crazy for ness to meet Rose and stop being obsessed with me." she says and I laugh against Alice's sweet lips.

I bite the lower one and pull away with it still in my teeth, scrapping against it before I let it go. "You are twenty times hotter than Rose." I say. Alice smiles "God, I love that you are so blinded by loving me." she says and kisses my lips. We make out for a minute before we pull away "IM not blind, I mean. Sure, Rose is hot if you're in to that hole pamper her for the rest of your life kind of thing. But she's also a bit self-centered and cold." I say and Alice stares at me for a second.

"I mean, she's cool when she doesn't like hate me or anything. She's funny and real but I'm just saying. You my love, my Alice. Are the single most beautiful girl in the world." I say smiling. Alice pulls away and smiles at me "So are you." she says and I role my eyes. "Sure I am." I say shaking my head. "Hey, I'm telling the truth." Alice says to me. I smile "And I love that your so blind to think so." I state and she kisses my lips. "Between us both. You're the one that can't see clearly Bells." She says before grabbing her phone and walking to the door. "Coming?" she asks.

I grab my cell and pack of cigs before walking out behind her. Shutting of the lights as I go. I stop my car seven minutes later in front of Ness's house to see her sitting on the steps of her porch smoking. I get out of the car and open Alice's door for her. We both walk over to Ness and I sit next to her and light up myself, "What up?" I ask leaning against the steps. A big cloud of smoke leaves Ness lips "Bored, but at least I have a great view." she says. I lift an eyebrow and she points across the road, I hold in my laugh.

Jessica Stanley is her front door neighbor and... she's washing her car... in shorts.. and a soaking wet yellow shirt. I smirk to myself and whistle lowly but enough for Jessica to hear me. Her head snaps up and I feel Alice elbow me. I grin "Jessica, I think you missed a spot." I call out loudly. Ness sits up "Fuck, Bella." she says as Jessica crosses the street towel drying her hands.

"Hey, Bella. Alice." She says still staring at me. "Jessica." Alice says. I chuckle and Jessica smiles "So, Bella. I was wondering, are you free tonight?" she asks. I blow smoke out and lick my lips "Um, me and Alice are back together Jess." I say. Jess smile doesn't falter "Hey, at least I can say I tried." she says. I chuckle and Alice huffs "Well, you could stop trying. It's very un attractive to hit on a taken woman." Alice says.

Jess rolls her eyes "It's also un attractive to cheat." Jess comments and I stand up "Hey, hey. Both of you calm down. Besides, Jess. I called you over, I was wondering if you have met my younger sister." I say with a grin. Ness looks un steady before she stands and puts out her cig. Jess looks at me like I grew a second head. "Sister?" she asks and she looks at ness.

Her jaw drops. Ness and I smirk. "Um, no. I don't think I have had the pleasure." Jess says after a second. "Jess, this is Ness. Ness, this is a friend of mine Jess." I say. Ness smirks and sticks her hand out "Hello." she says politely. Jess shakes her hand "Um, this is.. um it's a pleasure to meet you." Jessica says.

Ness winks "Pleasure is all mine." she says before letting the hang go and looking at Alice. I hold back a laugh "Well, we were just leaving. I'll see you around Jess." I say and Jess nods before she walks back to her car. "Bitch." Alice growls. I give her a small grin "What? I didn't expect a cat fight to go out." I say. Alice huffs and growls softly and I kiss her cheek. "Chill, we are over this whole thing." I say and kiss her just below the ear.

"Well... that was surely entertaining." Ness comments. I laugh softly and ruffle her hair, "Yup, but I know that girl... stay away from that girl." I say looking at Ness. She frowns "Why? you have some like claim on her?" Ness asks. I frown "Um, no. I know what she's like... just don't do it." I say chuckling. "But... she has a younger sister." I say with a grin. "How much younger?" Ness asks already interested. "Fourteen." I say. Ness grins, "I'm in." she says. I shrug "I don't know if she's gay." I say.

Ness looks at me like I grew a second head "Neither did half the girls back in my school." she says with a smirk. I laugh "Fine, fine. Good luck." I say and we walk to the car. Ness sits behind Alice and Alice in front. I lean against the car and take the last long as hell drag before putting the cig out and blowing the smoke out. I get in the car and I hear Ness chuckle "I'm guessing the in laws don't like you to much?" she asks. I chuckle "Oh, hard to say. But its actually the father that hates me the most." I say in fake cheerfulness as I take the turn to enter our road and then the second turn to enter the Cullen drive way.

"Well, that sounds just fabulous." she says. I hear Alice chuckle "They promised to be tame." she says. I smirk "So did I this morning, I broke that promise." I say and I hear Ness groan. "I swear, I thought I was bad but damn. Bella, do you have infinite stamina?" Ness asks. Alice laughs and so do I, "Maybe." I joke and my grin falters as I park the car in the corner of their driveway. I get out and so does Alice and Ness. "If you feel uncomfortable at all, tell me." I tell ness and she nods and we slide our sunglasses at the same time.

I smirk and Alice just roles her eye sat me and Ness. I hear Alice mutter something about "Fucking clones." Me and Ness chuckle at her as we make our way to the door. I put my hand in my pocket and let one tap against my thigh. I see Ness with both hands stuffed in her pockets. I can hear the sound of heel's clicking on the hardwood before the door opens to reveal Esme smiling. "Alice, I am so glad you came." she says. I hold back the urge to say 'Me too.' but hold it back, instead I slide a peace of gum in my mouth and I hand one to Ness. She nods in thanks. "Oh, Bella. How are you dear?" she asks and before I know it Esme wraps me in a hug. I stiffen before I wrap one arm around her tentatively "Hey, Esme." I say as she pulls away.

"I'm... dong good." I say with a small grin. Then she looks to the side "Oh, who is this beautiful young lady?" she asks. Ness, right.. "Oh, this is my little sister Renesmee. I hope you don't mind." I say and Esme smiles "Not at all dear, I made enough food to feed an army of Emmetts." she says. I laugh softly and nod as I walk in to the house "Nice to meet you Renesmee." Esme says, I turn to see Ness smiling "The pleasure is all mine Mrs. Cullen." she says. "Oh, child. Don't call me Mrs. Cullen. Call me Esme." she says to Ness. "Only if you call me Ness." Ness says with a smile.

Esme laughs "Well aren't you a little charmer." she says and looks at me "Well, the resemblance is un canny." Esme says. I grin a bit and shrug "My father's genes are strong." I say. Ness chuckles and just then I hear Emmett "Oh my god! THERE ARE TWO OF YOU!" he booms running down the steps and grabbing me in a bear hug. I clench my jaw but relax my back and try to hug him back, soon after he gets his greeting threw, he lets me down. I give him a small grin "Emmett, I want you to meet my little sister Ness." I say. He grins and before Ness can process she's in his arms.

"Bella, tell him to put me down!" Ness says worriedly and I laugh "Em, put the girl down." i say and he does so with a small pout "You know mini Bell. You are no fun." he says. I raise an eyebrow "Mini Bell?" we ask at the same time. "HAHAHAHAH you guys even talk at the same time!" he cheers. I role my eyes and run a hand threw my hair "How are things Em?" I ask. He grins "All good, the party is out back. Come on, I am starving." he says before he grabs Alice and tosses her over his shoulder "Hey little sis!" he booms and we all fallow after him.

"I apologize for my son, he is just very enthusiastic." Esme says to Ness. She chuckles "It's fine." she says softly. I put an arm around her shoulder "Don't worry Ness, three down, four more Cullens to go." I mumble in her ear before we reach the back yard. The back yard is decorated with two white tarps all with netting. Torches around and a pit of fire in the middle surrounded with chairs. All sitting in the seats talking around the fire pit are the rest of the Cullen's. Edward, Jasper, Rose and Carlisle. Emmett runs to the food tent to get something to eat. Jazz and Edward are talking with Rose and Carlisle is watching over the girl with a beer in hand. HA fucker, that's my beer!

I feel Alice's hand fall in to mine and I entwine our fingers and we walk behind Esme to the rest of the clan. Rose looks up first and as soon as she sees me her eyes shift to Ness and her face goes blank. She shakes her head and looks at Alice before a smile is on her lips and she stands to go to Alice. Alice lets go of my hand and is wrapped din her sisters hug. I stand there and look at Ness to see that her shades are low on her nose and her eyes are trailed to no one other than Rose.

"Bella..." Ness whispers to me. I chuckle "She is taken." I say lowly to her. She smirks "I like a challenge." she says. I shake my head "Not unless you want to be at the end of Emmett's fist." I mumble and she frowns "I... wait, there dating? I thought they were siblings?" she says. I shake my head "Emmett, is the first born but he was held back a year because he suffers from ADHD. Then Alice and Edward are twins. Rose and Jazz are adopted and Rose and Jazz are twins but there real parents held them out of school for a year, I know that's the main reason for them being removed from their home." I whisper. Ness nods slowly "Ok, so Rose and Em are dating? what else?" she asks as Edward and Jazz go to hug Alice. "Well, Eddie boy is gayer then a rainbow and he is with Jazz." I say lowly.

Ness chuckles "Wait... pour Edward. Jazz looks like the pitcher so Edward must be." I cut her off with my hand just as Edward comes over. "Hey, Bella. Who is this?" he asks with a kind smile. "Hey, Edward. This is my little sister Ness." I say. Edwards's eyes go wide "I... I didn't know you had a sister." he says. I smirk "Neither did she." Ness says and Edward smiles a bit "Nice to meet you Ness, I'm Edward." he says and they shake hands. Jazz appears "Jazz, come meet Ness." he says and Emmett yells "YO, mini Bells. You hungry?" he asks. Ness shrinks back a bit with everyone staring at her. "It's cool Em." I yell over. "Jazz this is Ness. Ness this is Alice's brother Jazz and Edward." I say.

She rolls her eyes "IM not mentally slow. I'm just not good with new people." she mumbles. I smile a bit "It's a pleasure." Jazz says shaking her hand. She smiles a bit "Pleasure is all mine." she says. Then, her being the little Casanova she is she walks over to Alice. "Alice, would you mind introducing me to your sister?" she asks.

Alice smirks a bit to herself "Sure, Ness. Ness this is my sister Rosalie. Rosalie this is Bella's little sister Ness." Alice introduces them. Rose actually looks...kind. Wait! how is it that they like her more then they like me!? ... _your fucking there sister._ Oh.. well... yeah, I get it. Ness smirks to herself as she shakes Rose's hand. "It's nice to meet you." Rose says. I see Ness take her sunglasses off "Pleasure is all mine." she says with a smile. not any smile, but THAT smile. Rose chuckles to herself before she looks around and I see Carlisle staring at me. I look at Ness "Ness, come over here. I want you to meet someone." I say and I walk over to Carlisle "I don't care what aversion you have against me, do not insult my sister." I say to him as I give him a slight pat on the back as greeting.

Ness walks over and I smile at her "Ness, this is Alice's father." I say. "I'm Ness." she says sticking her hand out. Carlisle nods and shakes her hand "Carlisle." he says. "I wasn't aware that you had any siblings Bella." he says. "I just found out actually." I say. He raises an eyebrow "My father held many things secret." is my only explanation. "Hey, Dad." I hear Alice say and Carlisle smiles at her "Alice." Carlisle says happily and they hug. Me and Ness both look at each other and look to the woods, an un spoken agreement. We're both hurting still.

I wrap an arm around Ness and walk away from Carlisle and Alice's embraced hello. We walk to the side, a bit apart "How you holding up?" I ask. She smiles "I like them, thy aren't so bad." he says. I chuckle "Sure, until you're fucking their daughter then they go apeshit." I mumble and she laughs. "You're so silly." she say sand I smile at her. I feel myself relax near Ness. I see a football on the ground and reach for it, "You play sports?" I ask Ness. She shakes her head "Total Klutz." she says. I smile "You'll outgrow it." I say and push her playfully. "Go long." I say and she groans before she jogs to a distance. I throw the football at her and she grabs it swiftly. She stops "I actually caught it!" she says. I smile and clap "Come on, throw it back." I say and Ness stops "No." she says.

I laugh "Come on, what are you chicken?" Emmett cheers. Ness huffs "Fine. Go long." she says and she smirks at me before launching it. I dash to the side and actually jump to be able to grab it. I laugh and jog back to the camp area "You have an arm on you." I say to Ness. She smirks and I smirk. Oh, she's good. "Very funny." I say. She bows "I live for entertainment." she says. I nod "You sure?" I ask. She nods. I mess up her hair and she growls "Dude, you have to stop doing that!" she says lowly. I put "Aw, did I hurt the kitten's feelings?" I say. She sends me a playful glare and smirks "Alice, I forgot to mention you left your shirt in my room." Ness says.

I gap at her. No freaking way. I roar with laughter, Emmetts booming laugh fallowing and then the rest of the Cullens except for Alice's who is fuming and Rose who is trying to hold it in. Carlisle is too far away with Esme to have heard anything. "You wish Ness. I don't like playing with babies. I like the big girls." Alice says and walks over to me and I hug her from behind. She shrugs "Fine, but when that girl is old and can't work her magic you know who to call." she says. I laugh in to Alice's shoulder "This is to fucking weird." I hear Rose state.

I look at her and try to hold back my laughter "You should be surprised at the discussions that run between these two." I say to her. Rose smirks "Just what the world needed, another Bella." she says. I laugh "Pfft, Ness wishes she was me." I say. Ness stares at me for a long moment "I want to get to know you, not be you Bell." Ness says. I smile down at her "Tell me that when you grow a few inches short stuff." I mumble. "You do know your girlfriend is my same height." Ness says.

I smirk "Oh, I know." I say. Alice elbows me and I stick my tongue out at Ness before kissing Alice's cheek. We fall in to easy conversation for once and soon we all sit down to eat. After a while Carlisle and Esme reenter the house and we are left to talk for a bit "So, your her sister?" Edward asks. I role my eyes "Yes, Eddie for the hundred time, I am her sister." I say. "Half-sister." Ness says. "Same shit different day." I say. "Don't curse in front of your sister." Alice says. I shrug "What, she has a busy mouth." I say with a shrug. Ness ducks her head and I laugh "I meant making out Ness." I say. She scratches the back of her neck not looking at anyone but the floor. "Little Bell. Don't worry, no one. And I mean no one can have a busier mouth then Bella when we reached Forks High." he says.

Ness looks at him "She made out with a person or even two every three days." he explains and I duck my head "Ness, don't fallow my lead." I say. "Trust me, I won't." she says. I look up and see her smirking "I'm making my own road." she explains. I nod "Good." I say and look around the fire place. "So, what's up in World Cullen?" I ask. Em shrugs "Nothing new." he says. "Missing Alice." Rose says. "Camping." Jazz and Eddie say at the same time. I laugh "Suuure, camping." I say. Eddie blushes.

Alice slides on my lap and kisses my jaw "So, you two are back together." Emmett says. I nod "Yup." I say with a grin. "When did that happen?" Rose asks. I open my mouth but am interrupted by my phone. I answer it "hello?" I ask as I walk to the side to let Alice explain how we got back together. "Bella, is Ness with you?" Clare asks. I nod "Yeah, she's with me." I say. "Oh, thank God. She didn't even leave a note. I was so worried" Clare says. I look at Ness "Oh, well. I assure you she is safe. Do you wish for me to bring her back?" I ask. Clare sighs "No, let her have her fun. Just... I'm just relieved she's ok." she says. I nod "Alright, I apologize for worrying you." I say and after a few words we hang up.

"Renesmee get over here." I call out pinching the bridge of my nose. I sigh and stare at her as she walks over "Why didn't you tell your mom you were out with me?" I ask. She shrugs "She wasn't home." she says. I look down at her and shake my head "Ness, she's your mom. She came home to not see you there. She's freaked out." I state. "Damn, I knew I forgot to do something." ness says.

I nod at her "Next time leave her a note at the least." I say. She nods "Ok, I'm sorry if I got you in trouble." she says. I shake my head at her "I didn't, I just... I bet it wasn't easy for her to not see you there and have no idea where you are." I say. Ness bites her lip and ducks her head and I tap her head before bringing her to a hug, what is it about this girl that makes me want to hug her all the time?

"I'm not angry at you, I just can't stand the idea of that happening. I'd be worried sick." I say to her before pulling away. She smile a bit at me "Really?" she asks. I nod "Really." I say and take a step to the Cullen Clan where Esme and Carlisle walk out with crackers, chocolate and marshmallows. "Bells." Ness calls after me. I turn to stare at her "Yeah?" I ask.

She walks over to me and wraps me in a hug, I chuckle as I hug her back "Thanks for choosing to be in my life." she says softly. I give her a long squeeze "I have to make up for fourteen years." I mumble. She shakes her head "No you don't, this makes us even." she says. I laugh softly "Silly girl." I muse patting her back. "I always wanted a big sister." she says softly. "I always wanted a little sister." I admit my hidden secret. I had always wanted a family, the only thing holding me back was the pain of losing my own. But now I have Ness and I have Alice. It's worth the risk.

We pull apart with soft smiles "Ps, You are so screwed when you get home." I say and Ness laughs as we walk back to the Cullens. I catch Alice's eyes and I see her bright smile. Ness walks over to Emmett where he starts telling her how to make smores and Alice walks over to me. "I love you." Alice says. I smile "I love you more." I say. She kisses my lips slowly and I kiss her back "I'm so happy that they like Ness." I mumble leaning my forehead against Alice's. She smiles "They love that girl." she says. I laugh softly "Yet they can't stand me." I mumble. Alice laughs "Well, you are sleeping with me." she says. "So? Jazz is sleeping with Ed. And rose is sleeping with Em." I say.

She rolls her eyes "Thy don't hate you silly, they all actually like you now. I think even dad like's you." she says. I shrug "Let's hope." I mumble touching my lips to hers once again. WE walk over to the fire and grab one of the already made smores and Alice sits on my lap. I take a bite and serve a bite to Alice. Marshmallow is stuck to her lower lip and I lean forward and kiss her licking off the marshmallow. I lick my lips "Yum." I say. Alice dips her finger in the melted chocolate and places it on my lips. I go to lick it off but she shakes her head "I got it." she says with a smile as she leans forward and licks my lips clean.

"Do that again!" I hear Emmett yell and when I look to the side I see Ness role her eyes before sticks two marshmallows in her cheeks "I made him an offer, he couldn't refuse." she quotes the godfather. I laugh along with the rest of us at Emmett's actual excitement. "Bella, your sister is the bomb! she knows the godfather!" he says. "She plays video games." I say and Emmett grins "Bet I can beat you." he says to ness. She grins "Bring it muscles." she says and the family goes to the inside with the plate of smores.

Esme leaves the half bag of marshmallows and some other smore things there for us as me and Alice quiet down. We start easy conversations and slowly we start to fall in to silence until we are just cuddling. We had moved to lay down on the grass absorbing the few bits of sun that are out today. "Alice." I whisper softly. She looks at me and I smile down at her "I really love having Ness here." I say. She smiles lazily up at me and touched her nose to mine in an eskimo kiss. "I know." she says resting back on the blanket.

I lean forward and kiss Alice slowly, just a sweet kiss. Its interrupted by the hollering from inside the house. We pull apart and stand up and walk back to see Ness actually beating Emmett in video games. "What did we miss?" I ask Jazz. He smiles "Ness is winning three to zero." Jazz says. I grin "Way to go Ness." I say. "All the while, hitting on Rose." Jazz finishes. I laugh "Niiice." I comment. Alice snickers and I check my watch, it's almost Ness curfew. "Ness, you're mom wants you back soon." I say.

She nods and kills Emmett's avatar before grinning "You owe me fifty." she says with a pat to his back. "See Rose, you with a man who can't even beat me in a video game... and who is not broke." Ness says as she grabs the money from Emmett. I laugh softly at Rose's actually blush, "Ness, as much as you are entertaining, you just don't have the parts." Rose says and Ness sighs "Damn, I really am getting my butt kicked with the Cullen woman." she comments more to herself as she walks over to me. "How do you do it?" she asks. I smile "I had great timing." I say.

Ness says goodbye to everyone and I take her to her house and return back to the Cullens house. I see that Edward and Jazz are playing video games with Emmett and I look to the side to see Rose alone. I look at Alice, and kiss her cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow." I whisper softly to her. She looks at me and shakes her head no. I look at her and she pulls me up the stairs and to her room.

The door closes and she pins me against the door kissing me. I kiss her back, loving her lips and slowly we move to the bed where I lay down and Alice straddles my lap. The kissing become less innocent, more frantic. and Alice pulls away gasping for breath as I try to control the urge to just take her. Alice chuckles and she uses her finger to brush strands of my hair out of my forehead. I relax in her touch, relish in it. My eyes flutter closed as Alice starts to trail invisible patterns across my face, "It can't be fun for Rose to be alone all day." I mumble.

Alice shrugs "I kinda get her." she says. I smile and sigh "I'm going to talk to the pack tomorrow." I admit. Alice's hand stops "Really?" she asks. I nod "I really did block them out when IT happened... and I owe them an apology." I say. Alice smiles "I'm glad you want to get there friendship back." Alice says. I nod and sigh "This may sound weird but, maybe Rose and you can go shopping tomorrow. You know, have some sister girl time." I say.

Alice nods "That just might work. Maybe I can pass the night here, re connect with them." Alice says. I smile "that's probably a good idea." I say, trying to ignore the sadness I feel with sleeping alone tonight. "You know, we haven't slept apart since we made up." I mumble with a grin. Alice chuckles "yeah, I know." she says.

I sigh "I better go, I need to finish some paper work I hid under the desk to finish quicker." I admit. Alice laughs and smacks my arm "I can't believe you." she says. I shrug "I wanted to hang out." I say. I stand from the bed and walk out to the front door. "Love you, see you soon." I say and Alice laughs "I'll be home in one day." she says. I smile "I love when you call my house home." I say. She smiles "You live there, it's my home." she says. I kiss her lips "have fun with your family." I say and with that I say my quick goodbye's over Alice's shoulder and drive back to my house and submerse myself in work.

**A/N: that's pretty much it for today. Next chap may have many different Pov's as i try to absorb everything that will be going on. :) hope you guys liked the chap! **


	75. Chapter 75

**A/N: happy to see you all liked the chap! ^_^ Now, I do this every so often road call of all the people reading my story, the only way I can be sure of that is how?... exactly, for you to review ;) they inspire me.**

**I don't own twilight... what a shame.**

**Ch.75**

**LeahPov  
**Its funny how stupid things can make a person smile. It's weird how a big thing, can crush someone. I tap my foot with the rhythm of the music blasting threw my stereo. I'm strumming away on my guitar when I hear my phone buzz. I grin, "Must be Jake." I say to myself as I put the guitar down and walk over to my dresser.

I flip the phone open and open the text without looking at the caller ID. **Meet me at the beach? I need to talk to you guys... I don't deserve it, but I hope you can spare a second for me. Bell. **The message stopped me cold and the smile on my lips faded in to a frown. Bella?... I haven't seen Bella since the party at Tyler's and it was pretty obvious she was as high as a kite.

Should I go?... I mean, sure she blocked us out but... we didn't exactly put up a fight. We were supposed to be there for her, she was crushed and we just vanished from her side... she wouldn't listen.. She wouldn't act rationally...

I shake my head to clear it, what am I going to do?

**SethPov**

I squeeze against the cold metal of the wrench I'm trying to pry off the damn bolt from my Bike. Stupid motorcycle getting fucked up again. Where is Jake? He said he would meet me, twenty minutes ago to help me fix it. Probably out with Billy or maybe even at someone's house. I sigh, Bella would be here helping me.

I frown at the thought of Bella, damn, I miss my sis. I pull harden against the wrench and it comes off abruptly hitting me in the gut with the force I put in to it. I cough and groan, "Damn it." I growl as I kick the bike and it crashes the ground. I throw the wrench to the side just as my phone beeps.

"Huff, probably Jake telling me he can't make it." I look at the caller ID to see... its Bella! I flip the phone open and read down the message quickly **Hey, little buddy. I was wondering if you wanted to meet up at the beach in a few? I know you might be mad at me but I gotta talk to you guys. Anyway, I'll be at the beach in twenty, hope to see you there. Bell. **I grin to myself.

"Bella is back." I say as I stand up and wipe my hands off on a bandana. Not being able to fight off the grin, I can't wait to see her. But... what if she's still the same?... I don't think I can see her so lost again... I shudder. No matter how much I want to just bolt over there, I need to think it threw. Look at both options and hope for the better but expect the worst. Damn, what to do?

**JakePov**

I rush threw my garage getting pieces I know Seth needs. Damn, I'm late and that kid is going to be pissed. I throw some spare part I had laying around in to the bag and put it in the rabbit. Just as I'm about to get in my phone beeps. "Shit." I mumble. It must be Seth yelling at me. I flip it open and stop when I see the sender. It's Bella.

**Jake, I know you're mad at me. Just meet me at the beach, I want to talk. I'll be there in twenty, hope to see ya there. Bells.**

I huff to myself, she's right I am angry at her. Angry that she thought her life ended just because Cullen fucked up. I mean, I know she was in love but... Love isn't the last thing on the earth. But the real thing is, who am I more mad at? Cullen? or Bella?... Twenty minutes?... damn, that's nearly not enough time to make up my mind. I put my car in gear and pull out of the garage. I'll just drop the pieces off at Seth's and maybe talk to him and Leah about this text. Something tells me, she doesn't want to talk with just me. I don't know why it's so hard to make up my mind.

**Bpov**

I drum my fingers nervously against the steering weal as I drive down the familiar curves to La Push. I had texted Leah, Seth and Jake to meet me at the beach. Hopefully, they won't ignore my text and want to meet up with me. I don't deserve it, but then again. I don't deserve most things I have or get now do I?

I raise the volume on the song on my radio ironically its Tatu. Friend of Foe. Damn, I really wish I can fix this mess I created.

**Is it too late?**  
**Nothing to salvage**  
**You look away**  
**Clear all the damage**

**The meaning to**  
**All words of love**  
**Has disappeared**  
**We used to love one another**  
**Give to each other**  
**Lie under covers so,**  
**Are you friend or foe**

I park my car on the corner of the parking edge next to the beach. I get out of my car and let the salty air relax me a bit along with the sound of the waves crashing. I role my shoulders, God, I hope they show up. I walk down the sand dunes and on to the rocky shore of the beach. I walk along the shore, a foot from the waves crashing as I make my way to "our spot" I sigh when I see it empty. Some of the hope vanishing from me as I make my way up the small hill to the area.

I look around the beach, no where do I see people. I sigh and walk to the edge of the woods and grab some dry wood and start a small fire. Looks like I'm camping out, for a bit. After I get the fire started I sit on the log and with a long stick I poke at the fire every once and a while to make sure it lives. Now, it's the waiting game.

**Love one another**  
**Live for each other**  
**So, are you friend or foe**  
**Cause I used to know**

**The promises**  
**Hollow concessions**  
**And innocent show of affection**  
**I touch your hand**  
**A hologram**  
**Are you still there**  
**We used to love one another**  
**Give to each other**  
**Lie under covers so,**  
**Are you friend or foe.**

Five minutes past... then ten... fifteen... then twenty. An hour past, and no sign of the pack. I stoked the fire and had made a small stack of wood I would throw in every few minutes are so. They had to come, they just had to. I had to undo the wrong I did and ask for forgiveness. I hear rocks shift behind me and I turned eagerly to see... only Sam.

I give him a small smile "Hey, Sam." I say. He nods to me "What are you doing here Bella?" he asks, his tone a bit hard. I frown "Um, waiting for the pack. They were supposed to meet me here a few minutes ago. So I'm just waiting." I say with a small shrug. He nods and gives me a small smile and pat's my shoulder "I don't think they're going to show up." he comments as he sits down on a log next to mine, but a feet or so away. I frown "Why do you say that?" I ask.

He chuckles and throws a piece of wood in to the fire "Because, you have been here for an hour and I haven't seen any of them even pass through." he says. I sigh and sit down as well, "Cough my bluff huh?" I ask with a quirk of my lips, trying to ignore the dejected feeling coursing through my body. Sam chuckles and nods "I guess I did." he says in his deep voice. "How's Emily?" I ask. He looks at the fire with a great smile at mention of his wife. "She's doing great. I think it helped that we found the bear and made him in to a rug." he laughs. I chuckle lowly "Yeah, I guess it did." I say. Emily had been attacked by a bear a year prior to all of this insanity. She now has three long claw marks down the side of her face.

Hunting groups were formed, to kill out a bear with only one eye and a long scar running threw his side. They had hunted for months before they found it and killed it. Sam had ordered it to be skinned and now as his own personal joke maid it in to a rug for his dog. Of course, Emily doesn't know that the rug is the bear, she would have a fit. "Sam, you do know that if Emily wants the operation to get rid of them... I'll pay for the whole thing." I say softly. Sam gives me a soft smile "Thank you, Bella. And I will discuss it with her after some time has passed and if she wants it, ill contact you and make a plan for the payments for the loan." he says.

I laugh a bit "No loan, Sam. A gift, trust me. I have more money than I do a life, it's a curse and a gift. The least I can do is help out you guys." I say. He smiles "Bella, you gave the hole rez supply's to remake our homes. I think you have done enough." he says. I smile "You give until you can give no more. I can still give, so I will." is all I say as a calm silence consumes me and Sam. It's still light out, probably around 3 or 4pm. Yet, it looks darker. It's the clouds obviously but... I shake my head.

I sigh and run a hand threw my short hair "Do you think... the pack will forgive me?" I ask after a pause of silence between me and Sam. I look at him threw locks of my short hair that sweep over my eyes. He pursues his lips and one hand goes to rub his chin "Well" he starts in his thick voice "What happened between you and the pack is still a mystery to most of us here. The only in sight is that you were in some comatose state of misery." he says and I flinch a bit. He doesn't notice, and if he did he ignored it.

"So... it's hard to say. But let's put it this way, the way the legends go." he says and I try to repress an eye role. "When the alpha of a pack leaves the group, the Beta takes charge of the group in its absence. And when the Alpha comes back, the Beta has to fight with the alpha for the right. Think as this as Jacobs first move of defiance against you, he has been repressing his emotions for a long time. Besides we do descend from wolves. " Sam says with a wink. I laugh softly and nod slowly. I slouch my shoulders bringing a hand to my face "I never wanted this to happen. Sam, I love them. There all the family I had when I had no one, but I went off the deep end before they could help. And by the time they did, I was just... too far gone. I know it's a lousy explanation for my behavior but it's the truth, it's not an excuse... I just want my old family, to meet my new one." I say as I look up at Sam who is now standing.

"Time passes, Bella. And people change. You are a living example of that. Things have just changed as does time... the only way to stand against it is to face it. And... maybe today just wasn't your day." He says with a small pat to my shoulder as he squats down to look at me. A small smile on his face "You just have to know what you're next move is, wolf. And then anticipate, Jacobs. They will come around, besides. La Push has been way to quiet since you've been gone." he says and with another pat to my shoulder he stands and walks away. "Thanks Sam!" I yell over my shoulder, but my eyes looked on the fire. I light my second cig of the day and slowly smoke it, letting it take my worry's with its calming smoke.

**Love one another**  
**Live for each other**  
**So, are you friend or foe**  
**Cause I used to know**

**Is it too late**  
**Nothing to salvage**  
**You look away**  
**Clear all the damage**  
**The meaning to**  
**All words of love**  
**Has disappeared**  
**We used to love one another**  
**Give to each other**  
**Lie under covers so,**  
**Are you friend or foe**

**JacobPov  
**Something tells me, I'm going to regret this. Another says she deserves this.

**SethPov  
**Time passes, and people grow apart. It's just part of life right?

**LeahPov**

This is going to get my ass kicked. I can just feel it.

**Bpov**

Hour and a half passes...Please show up, please show up. Please. I just need to say sorry. I put my head in my hands and groan, "Life, you can't hate me this much can you?" I ask it.

**Love one another**  
**Live for each other**  
**So, are you friend or foe**  
**Cause I used to know**

**OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO**

**Apov.**

"Rose stop being a big baby! And try it on!" I say as I hand her a red dress. She rolls her eyes "It won't look good." she states. I shake my head and wink "I have a feeling it will look great." I say excitedly. She sighs before walking over to the dressing rooms and closing the door. "If I look like a red, fat cherry. I am blaming you!" she says from behind the door.

I laugh as I lean against the door "Rose, one you're not fat and two you like red." I state. another sigh "Fine, ok. I like red. I just don't think I can pull this dress off." she says. I laugh at her "You can pull anything off Rosie. You were just built for modeling." I say and I hear the lock behind me un hitch and I walk a few steps in front of the door and turn to see her walk out.

My lips form in a smirk. "Never bet against me." I say as she twirls in front of the three mirrors looking around herself from all angles. "I would win." she says. I laugh "Yea sure, at least Bella accepts defeat when I bet with her." Rose twirls one more time before nodding. "I'm getting it." she states and walks back in to get changed. I smile and look at my phone, an hour and still no word from Bella. Huh... maybe she's having fun with the pack. I shrug and grab a shirt from the rack just as Rose walks out. "Speaking of Bella, where is she? I thought you two were chained to the hip?" Rose asks with a small smile as she bumps her hip to mine.

I chuckle at her "She wanted to see if she could meet up with Jake, Leah and Seth." I say. Rose nods with a small smirk "The pack? I thought they all broke up." she states. I nod "They kind of did, well... at least Bella pulled away. She's trying to see if she can make amends." I say. Rose nods her lips pursed "So... she treating you right?" Rose asks as we walk through roes of clothes. I love the mall.

I stop and look at her over the small rack of clothing "Rose." I warn. She gives me a small smile "I am only curious, just in case I have to kick her but again." she says with a wink. I shake my head "Yes, Rosie. She's treating me just fine. And besides, the only reason you kicked her but was because she didn't want to hit you back. You've seen the girl fight, she could inflict mayor damage." I say as I grab a blue dress I know Bella would love on me. Rose sighs and mutters "That's what worries me." as she looks threw the clothes.

I look at her "Rose." I say softly and she looks up at me. "Bella's never raised a hand to me. I mean, sure we've fought but the most violent reaction I've gotten out of her is her throwing something across the room and yelling. Me on the other hand, I have slapped her, punched her even kicked her once. Oh, and one time I threw a plate at her feet. She's never thrown anything at me, maybe besides a pillow and what was in playful fun. Really Rose, Bella... hmm.. how to I explain." I mutter to myself.

I see rose nod "Yes please, because I am lost." she says. I laugh a bit "Ok, I think I have an explanation. Bella is strong, a fighter. She hits Kate because Kate can defend herself well against Bella. She hit Tanya because Tanya used to be on the fighting team to. So, basically... Bella is a gentleman, er gentlewoman. She won't hit a lady but, if she has to. She makes sure it's someone that won't get to hurt by it." I say more or less confidently. It's true. Bella fights with people she know can take it. It explains why she's never raised a hand to me.

I see Rose sigh as she runs a hand threw her long locks. "So, your saying you have hit Bella. More or less provoked her to make her angry and she still won't raise a hand to you?" she asks. I nod "Yup." I pop the 'p' a habit Ness has passed to me. "Well, I'll be damned." Rose mumbles. "Fucking Gina would have punched you right back." she says venom in her words. "Bella isn't like Gina." I say simply.

Rose nods slowly "I know, she's been threw a lot huh?" Rose asks softly as we make our way to the dressing rooms again. I nod softly "Yeah... about that.. Rose, when I told you guys about Bella's past... I truly thought she was going to be gone forever. But now she's back and I was hoping if.." I trial off slowly. Rose nods and gives me a soft wink "Don't worry, we all agreed that our lips our sealed. And if Bella ever trust us enough to tell us her past... we will be there to listen and have her back." Rose says softly. I smile at her as I close the door and quickly change clothes.

I walk out and Rose whistles "Wow, Ali. You look hot, I didn't know you liked blue." she states. I feel my cheeks redden and heat flow up to my face "Um, I like blue." I say softly as I twirl in the mirror. Rose hums "You did, but you never owned a blue dress. And is that a blush I see?" she teases me. I huff "Rose, knock it off." I say. She grins "Now, tell me. Does Bella like blue, perhaps?" she asks smirking. I role my eyes at her and she laughs "You little tease you, Bella likes blue on you so you deliberately buy a blue short dress. Pour Bella, she's going to be suffering metaphoric blue balls when she sees you." she says and laughs at her own joke.

I chuckle "Fine, Yes. Bella likes blue, I like a happy... slight horny Bella. We all win." I say with a shrug. Rose smirks "Man, you two put Bunny's to shame." rose says. I laugh "Its... yeah, you're right." I dead pan. "So, this may sound weird but I am curious... is Bella um.. good in bed?" Rose asks. I laugh and look at her "Why Rose, Ness got you curious?" I tease her. She laughs and shakes her head and I go back to the dressing room and change back to my clothes.

"No, not at all. Though I will get to that later. Now, answer my question." Rose demands. I let a grin pass my lips as we make our way to pay for the clothes. "I'll tell you threw late lunch." I say as I look at my watch. I pay for everything with the card Bella demanded I used. I have my own money, but Bella took my credit card. No, in not joking. She saw me checking my credit cards and she pulled out the one I normally use to shop, She handed me a card she had made for me and shook her head when I demanded to get it back.

I shake my head "So, Bella gave you a credit card?" Rose asks as I slip the black card in to my wallet. I frown "She took the one mom gave me." I say as I grab the bags. "Really? why?" Rose asks. I shrug "I guess she just wants to pamper me and the only way she knows how is to buy me things. And if she doesn't go, she insist to pay for them." I say. Rose sighs "Damn, is it too late to get on the Bella train and just let her fuck me and buy me clothes?" Rose teases. I laugh "Good luck with that, she told me that you were cool just not her type." I admit as we put the bags in the car and walk back in to the mall.

"You're kidding right?" she asks. I shake my head chuckling "Apparently you look like the 'pamper me every second of every day' type of girl." I say with a shrug. "What does that mean?" Rose asks laughing. I laugh too "I'm not sure, I think it just means you want all attention on you." I say and Rosie nods "Good point." Rose says with a shrug.

We enter one of the nicer restaurants in the mall in Seattle and sit down. "So, you owe me an answer." she says. I frown "Why are you so curious about my sex life?" I ask. Rose rolls her eyes "I have told you everything about me and Emmett." Rose says. I grimace "Yeah, I still wish you would have kept some things secret." I say as I fight off a shudder.

We order quickly and then I groan "Fine, I'll tell you. But this stay's between us Rosie." I warn. She smiles "Fine by me." she says. I groan again "Rose, now I know why every freaking girl in Forks wants her so bad." I say as I put a hand on the side of my head to lean my head on. Rose chuckles "What? is she really that good?" Rose asks confused. I gap at her "Good? Rose, I'm not joking. She's like a freaking sex God!" I exclaim to her. Rose laughs and ducks her head on her arm. "You're kidding." she states.

"Rose, most night she won't let me go to sleep until I have, um.. climaxed more than three times!" I tell her in a hushed whisper. Rose gaps at me "More than three? fuck, I'm lucky if Em has enough energy for round three. Then there is the hole if he does it right, I'll get a good one." she says. I grin to myself "Every single one of mine is mind blowing." I say and Rose laughs and the plates of food are placed in front of us with our drinks.

"So, is that why you have a slight um, spring in your step when you got home yesterday?" she asks with a knowing smirk. I laugh "She attacked me in the shower! She has like... an infinite hunger for sex. She's turned on by the simples of things I do and then, sometimes. Even if she's like, crazy for it. She will just cuddle with me." I say. Rose smiles to herself "In the shower? hunger for sex, turned on by simple things and cuddles? Shit girl, if you let her go. I just might join your club." Rose jokes.

I laugh as I take a bite from my mushroom ravioli. "But, the sex isn't even the best part about her." I say and Rose lifts an eyebrow. "Ok, spill. I obviously don't know the same Bella you know." she states. I laugh softly "Rose, she's funny and romantic. She's so smart! Like, I can't just sit there and hear her talk for hours and I won't get bored. She has this playful side to her that, is so rare for anyone to see. But, she shows it to me, and now to Ness. Oh, and Rose. She is so protective of Ness, its freaking adorable and hot at the same time. Bella... she's... there are no words to describe how Bella is." I say shaking my head as I poke at my food just aching to go back to her.

"Really? Bella has a romantic side... I mean, I saw the playful side yesterday. It was so cute how she just instantly fell in to the big sister role." Rose says with a small smile. I nod "Rose, she sang to me in Spanish, took me to France. Proposed to me while we were in France, she showed me how to waltz... she quotes poetry and sometimes when we snuggle she just... her eyes just burn in to mine and we have like this silent conversation... she's just perfect." I say shaking my head as I take another bite of my food.

Rose smiles softly "Sounds like you two are really in love... hey, talking about the engagement is it still on?" she asks. I stop eating, shit... I totally forgot. Is the engagement back on? "I... I don't know." I say softly. Rose frowns "Haven't you two talked about it?" She asks. I shake my head "I guess... it was kind of the kiss of death for our relationship when she proposed.. I just don't know to bring it up. Its sort of taboo at the moment." I say softly as I take a sip from my water. "Oh... then I guess you two have a bit to talk about still." Rose says. I nod slowly, "Her house... its home to me Rose." I say looking at her. She frowns "Our house is home, Ali." she says. I nod and grab her hand from over to table "I have two wonderful homes. I have one whit my fabulous, workaholic girlfriend and I have another with my rambunctious, loud and annoying family." I say giving her hand a squeeze. Rose laughs and pats my hand "I just wish you would move back.. I get so bored without my best friend." Rose says softly. I smile at her, "I'm only a phone call away, or hell a five minute drive." I say shrugging.

She smiles, "Good, cuz if she keeps you to herself. I just might to have to move in, and no one wants me to hear yelling at you two for going at it, like rabbits.' she says and I laugh and we finish our lunch in peace. After a long time we decide to just head home. A relaxed air settling between us. I wonder what Bella is doing...

**OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo **

**Rpov**

It was a little odd to hear Alice call Bella's house 'home', but I can see why she would see it that way. I'm still a little upset that we judged Bella that now that I know what she went through. I can… understand her a little better now.

But it's more than that. I saw the way that Bella just took all of Alice's hits that day in the parking lot – hell, I went after her even more than Ali did. Still, she never raised a hand to either of us. She just stood there and took it. Fuck, she _invited _Alice to hit her. And then, when Alice was finished, she accepted it.

I sighed. As little enthusiasm as I may have had for their relationship, I couldn't deny that Bella was a thousand times better for her than that bitch Gina. And now, I found myself almost hoping for the day that Bella might trust us enough to tell us about her past herself, so that I could talk to her about it. Because, I may be strong and have the Ice Queen attitude down to a 't' but it would be nice to talk to someone who really… understood. Because, as much as I love my family and vice versa, they couldn't understand it, not really – not the way Bella could.

Besides, anyone willing and even eager to buy their girl whatever she wants or needs – including extraordinary amounts of clothes, shoes, and accessories – is that much closer to finding a place in my guarded heart.

**OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo **

**Bpov**

I put out yet another cig, this is ridiculous. It's almost dusk! I've been here sitting pathetically alone for five hours! its six o'clock now! Alice will be home any minute and the pack obviously won't meet with me. I sigh as I grab a big peace of stick and throw sand in to the fire. I knock the wood down and spread it out so it won't catch anymore and throw more sand over it. The fire is still on but it will die in a few minutes unless I throw more wood on it. I sigh and turn to be face to face with... Emily?

I frown "Hey, Emily." I say and give her a small smile. She smiles "Leaving?" she asks. I sigh and shrug "I can spare some time." I say and motion for Emily to sit down. She takes a seat and I sit down "Don't be angry at them." Emily says softly. I smile a bit "I'm not mad at them, I'm a bit disappointed and upset with myself seeing as I'm to blame for this situation." I say with a small smile. Emily 'hmm's softly "Life isn't all about who is to blame." she says. I nod "I know." I speak softly.

Emily smiles to herself, "I have a gift for you, Bella." she says. I frown "A gift for me?" I ask. She nods and reaches in to her pocket for a small piece of colored cloth. She hands me the small rectangle and I smile "It's beautiful." I say and she laughs "Its inside the cloth." she says and I raise an eyebrow as I open the cloth and she that in the middle there is a small dream catcher. It takes my breath away "Wow, Emily its... amazing. Did you make this?" I ask and I see her nod "Elders have passed down the skills by generation." she says. I run my fingers above the small threads in a spider web pattern "This is incredible, thank you Emily." I say looking at her with a smile.

She smiles at me and walks over and sits next to me. "I thought you would like an escape from nightmares every now and then." she says and places a hand on my shoulder. I feel my lips twitch up and "There must be a way to repay you for this." I say softly. She shakes her head "I'm quite fine, I'm just happy you liked it." she says. "I love it." I correct her. She laughs softly "Good, now. Head on home Bella, it's going to rain and the last thing we need is for you to get sick, eh wolf?" she asks with a wink.

I laugh softly and we both stand just as the wind catches and a small shiver runs threw me and Emily. We laugh in sync and start to walk together to her house. When we reach her house I give her a quick hug and pull back. She smiles "What was that for?" she asks. I smile "For keeping me company." I say and she smiles as I wave at Sam who is sat on the porch. He waves back and I sigh running a hand threw my hair "Sam." I call and he looks at me "If... If you see the pack.. can you tell them that I'm sorry." I say and he nods once. "Good night, you two." I say and with that I slowly make my way across the road and to my car. I see a note on my windshield and frown "How the hell did I get a ticket?" I ask as I reach for it.

I flip it to see it's an envelope, I frown. I look around before I slip in my car and turn on the overhead light. I rip the envelope open to see a small letter in it.

_**You want to talk to us, please speak to me first. We both know that the big problem is between us, I'll tell you when we can meet. -Jake.**_

I sigh and crumple the note, I guess this is more a mind game whit Jake then I ever though it to be. Maybe Sam on to something when he said the Alpha and Beta had to fight... stupid legends.

I lay down on the bed exhausted, this is just a bit much. Around five minutes after I lay down I hear the front door close. Alice is home and I can't fight the smile as I stay there in bed just relaxing. Soon enough I hear her footsteps as she enters the room and I look up to see her smile a bit as she walks to the closet and puts down her bags. She slides her shoes off and walks over to the bed in her short skirt and lose blouse that looks just amazing on her. I smile "Hey, baby." I say and she sits on the edge of the bed and leans forward to kiss my lips softly "Hey." she says and runs a hand threw my hair. I let my eyes close as I relish in her warm presence as her agile fingers massage my scalp.

"How did the shopping day go?" I ask as I open my eyes to look at her. She smiles "It was great, I had so much fun with Rose." she says. I smile brightly at her "I'm glad you had fun. What did you buy?" I ask leaning on my elbows. Alice smiles and jumps happily up and grabs the bags from the side of the closet and walks over to the bed, I sit up and make room for her bags, and she has like seven. I smile as I see her excitedly show me every article of clothing except for two bags.

I raise an eyebrow "What about those two." I say motioning for them. She grabs them and tucks them behind her back. I smile at her "Alice... what do you have behind your back?" I ask chuckling. She grins to me, "One is a surprise." she says. I nod "And the other?" I ask. She grins, and without a word walks in to the closet with all the bags. I laugh at the girl, she is so random. I put my iPod to sound softly in the surrounds sound, deciding to relax while Alice hides her clothes in the closet.

After a minute or so, the light in my room dims down and I frown as I open my eyes properly to see that the only light in my room is from the closet. I look at the switch to see Alice leaning against the wall in... holly shit.

**Skip to next bold line.**

My center clenches at the sight of Alice, I am automatically aroused. She's wearing this... amazing blue night gown, its tight so I can see every single delectable curve of her, the night gown leaves nothing to the imagination, as I can see every single inch of her threw the thing blue material. I lick my lips a bit and look at Alice, she has a small smirk on her lips.

"What do I owe the pleasure?" I ask as she starts a seductive walk to me. Every step she takes, the more wet I get. She's... "Fuck." I breathe out grazing my lips with me teeth as my eyes look over her body until she's at the foot of the bed just looking at me. She 'hmm's as she stares at me and the way her dark eyes look over my body make my breathing go deep. "Take your shirt off." she states, her voice filled with sexual authority. "Alice... what are you doing?" I ask.

I see the arm that was behind her back and I feel my core clench when I see this kind of wicked whip in her hand and she pats it softly "Take your shirt off." she says. I smirk "What if I don't?" I challenge and Alice pats the end of the whip lightly on the bed and smirks at me "Do you really want to find out?" she asks. I shudder a bit at the sultry sound in her voice and defiantly as I am, I nod.

Alice smirks and walks to the side of the bed and before I can focus on her better the whip smacks against my jean clad thy painfully delicious. I hold back a small groan as I stare at up her, the whip goes under my chin, lifting my head up to her and she leans forward "Next time, I won't miss." she breathes against my lips. She brushes almost impossibly light against my lips before she pulls away. I quickly pull the shirt off my body and throw it to the ground as I look at her.

She smirks and puts the whip under her chin as she looks at me up and down, "Pants." she says but I smirk as I look up at her, she must know I'm not going down without a fight. The runs the whip up my leg and it brushes my crotch before it pats it a bit roughly and I moan softly at the feeling. Alice trails the whip up until its on my stomach and smacks it more roughly making me arch and my stomach clenching in lust. "Do I need to tell you again?" she asks. I nod once more and she smacks the whip against my stomach rougher yet, it stings but it feels so good in the burning fire running in my veins.

I decide that if I keep this up, I'm going to cum without Alice even touching me. So I comply. I kick my shoes off, my socks and kick my pants off. Alice's hand brushes over me almost as a ghost, not really touching my skin, grazing it lightly. "Hmmm, my masochist. how beautiful you are." she says softly. My breath is still heave when I let our eyes connect and I jump when I feel her cup me from over my underwear. "Relax... It's all about you." She says softly before she straddles my hips. I feel her lips graze my neck sensually as she runs her hands over my body achingly slow. She pulls away and tells me to turn around.

I hold back a laugh as I comply. I crack a joke and Alice actually spanks my butt! I hear Alice's softly laugh against the back of my ear as her hands dance across my back. I feel her lips kiss and bite at the nape of my neck. Her hands quickly un fasten the clasp and she takes it off. her hands great my breast and I moan softly when I feel her fingers pinch my nipples.

"fuck." I breathe before Alice pulls back and I lay down on my back to see her. I connect our lips in a quick kiss before my hands work to take of the night gown. Soon enough, the silky blue night gown is off Alice and on the floor along with my underwear. were both naked on the bed kissing before I feel Alice trail kisses down my neck and start to suck at my breast. I knot a hand in her hair holding her there as I relish in the feeling of Alice's lips against me. Soon she switches and plays with the other in an intense feeling spreads threw my body.

Slowly, painfully so Alice trails down until she's at the place where I'm throbbing for her. I feel her breath fan out across me and I shudder at the feeling of her licking me and sucking against my clit. The pleasure is almost too much to comprehend, the feeling. "Alice.." I breathe out a moan and she somehow knows what I mean because her tongue is replaced by her perfect fingers and she leans up so that she can kiss me. I groan against her lips as I taste myself on her tongue. I moan loudly when Alice starts to rock our body's increasing how deep she can go in me. Alice adds a third finger in to me, making me gasp against Alice's lips as she ducks her head to my shoulder using her hips to rotate against her hand to keep a good rhythm. I lift Alice's head and duck my head down to take her nipple in to my mouth sucking on it without mercy.

I hear her gasped moan and my hips push against her fingers making sure that she moans along with me. I nip at her breast trying to give her as much pleasure as I am feeling. She pushes her thrum in quick circles against my clit and I feel myself clench. My legs shake with the feeling as Alice groans out my name. I moan when I feel her tongue at my neck and then I feel her bite me, harshly but I love it. I groan once more at just the feeling of Alice. God, she feels so good.

"ungh, I'm so close baby... please... don't stop." I moan out and I feel Alice start to rock us both quicker and harder as I feel myself shudder hard. "Let go, Bella. Let go for me baby." Alice says breathless against my ear before she flicks her thumb over my clit

**BOLD LINE, free to read.**

I'm pushed over the edge. I tense before my body start to shudder and my eyes shut and my mind blank. All I can see behind my eyes are swirls of colors in a black back ground. Peace, pleasure and happiness. Its mixed with energy... yet exhaustion. The pure bliss of just existing... yet dying.

You know, I used to say that an orgasm was just a sample of death. You exist... yet you don't. You feel... yet there is nothing to feel. There is energy... and exhaustion. Something and nothing. All perfectly in harmony. Slowly I feel myself dropping back, coming back from the cloud. I feel my eyes open and I see Alice's head resting in her hand as her other hand traces my face, a small smile on her lips. "Where did you go?" she ask, soft humor in her tone.

I feel my lips form a smile as I lean up so that my face is next to hers "To the stars." I mumble against her lips as we kiss. I feel Alice's arm snake around my waist as she pulls herself closer to me and snuggles in to my neck. My arms wrap around her "I love you." I say quietly, afraid to lose the peace in my dark house. Alice kisses my cheek "I love you more." she says. I shift so that my hand is at her waist "Now, what do we do about you." I mumble against her neck. Alice shakes her head and pulls away, her nose grazing mine "Today was all about you, you can take care of me tomorrow." she says.

I kiss her lips "I'm not one to wait." I say against her lips as I push her against the pillows. "Tomorrow, Bella.. I'm tired." Alice's says against my lips I sigh and pull back snuggling against Alice, "Fine." I sigh. "Goodnight my love." I say quietly. "Goodnight, love." she says and we fall in to a peaceful sleep."


	76. Chapter 76

**A/N: Hey, loved your guy's response to the last chap. So, hopefully this one will be THE POLLE ON MY PROFILE FOR A STORY YOU WOULD LIKE ME TO WRITE ALONG SIDE CHOICES!  
**

**I don't own twilight. O.o what you say? **

**Ch. 76**

**Bpov**

Kick, punch, jab, jab, jab, kick. Space back, duck, kick, roundhouse kick. I straighten up to hear the satisfying sound of the punching bag hit the wall in the far corner of my gym. I take three steps forward and go to the pull up bar.

I grab the cold metal in my warm hands as I lift myself from the floor and curl my legs and start. Lift, hold, down. Lift, hold, down. Lift, hold, down. I keep my slow steady breathing like Charlie had told me to do. My muscles burned, heat all I could feel around me in waves after every pull up.

"Twenty... twenty one... twenty two... twenty three... oh fuck!" I growl when I feel the sweat in my hands make my grip slip and I crash to the ground with a loud thud. Pain running threw out my entire back. "Son of a bitch." I growl out as I role around to my hands and knees and cough out the pain on my back. With a small groan and stand straight and sigh as I run a hand threw my sweaty hair.

I look at the wall that is just a full mirror wall and sigh as I see the dark bags under my eyes. I lean my head on the long mirror just staring back in to my dark eyes. Eyes are the window in to the soul; I see Alice's soul every time I look in her eyes... I wonder if she can see mine.

Can she see that dark and broken soul that lives within me? Does she see every scar plain on me, the gashes? Can she peace me out, the way I can with her?... Does she know my every single tick and knack... my mom used to.

I shake my head furiously. Don't go there Bella. Anywhere but there. Alice knows you, why do you have to analyze every single things until it twist to something sad? Shit man, you're kinda pathetic. I sigh as I decide to call it a day with the exercise and make my way to my room. As I had guessed Alice is on the bed drawing, I avoid looking at her as I head to the shower directly. "Hey, Babe. I heard a thud, did something fall?" Alice asks.

I turn around to see her looking at me. I smile a bit, "Oh, you know. I slipped my grip and fell." I say with a shrug. "You fell? Since when do you fall Swan?" Alice teases. I shrug "Bad luck." I say laughing a bit. I run a hand threw my messy hair again and point over my shoulder "I'm going to go take a shower." I say and I see Alice's lips trail in a telling smirk.

"I don't know... you look pretty good just like that." she says as she walks off the bed and to me. I smile a bit "Really, just like this?" I ask. Alice nods as she makes her way to me "Really, hair all messy, yoga pants that look amazing on you, black sports bra and all I can see is skin. I don't know, I may have to change every outfit in your closet to just that for you." she says as she leans close, I manage out a laugh as I kiss her softly.

"Ok, you bag of hormones. Back off, I need a decent shower." I say as I pull away from her and Alice laughs and pokes my abdomen. "Who are you calling bag of hormones, sex addict." she teases back. I wink at her as I kiss her once more before pulling back. "Babe, I'm making dinner. What do you want?" I ask her as I shrug out of my clothes.

"You, but if I must choose a food... I want you're pasta." she says. I nod as I slip in to the shower. "Ok, so how about the one I made last week?" I ask over the shower. "That sounds great, want me to take out the meat while you shower?" she asks. I duck out of the stream of water "That'd be great babe." I say to her before I start to pour soap on my loofa and start scrubbing at my skin. I make sure to not let my mind wander of showering wile I scrub at the sweat on my body. The soap falls and my mind snaps it focus

_~FLASHBACK~_

_*BANG, BANG, BANG.* "Stay awake Isabella, wouldn't want you sleeping threw this." A sickly rough voice hisses in my ear as the pain and darkness consume me. _

_~ENDFLASHBACK~_

I place my hands on my mouth to hold back the scream building in my through. I lean my back against the cold tile and slide down and sit down trying to get a hold of my erratic breathing. I close my eyes as I let my back relax, it was just a memory. He's not here, he's not getting out. A few minutes pass and my mind finally relaxes as I shut the water off and quickly get dressed feeling unnerved at being naked at the moment. After I make sure to wear a baggy jacket with a hood and baggy pants I feel more relaxed. Less skin exposed, a tad more comfort comes to me. After I slide on some socks and towel dry my hair I put on some deodorant and body spray before walking down to the kitchen.

I see Alice in the living room and I smile at myself as I see her head turn, but her eyes still trained on the TV. "Bella, remember that Clare is working tonight so Ness should be over soon." she says. I nod and bite my lip "Hey, why don't you invite your family over? We can, um... have a sort of family night. I'm sure I have some board games somewhere around here and stuff." I say with an easy shrug. I see a smile tug at Alice's lips as she grins "I think that seems like a great idea." she says. She jumps off the couch and over to me to give me a soft hug before she kisses my lips slowly. "I'll give them a call then give you a help in the kitchen." Alice says. I go to protest but she just shakes her head at me as she walks back to the living room.

I walk to the kitchen and put the pot of water to boil along with a bit of salt and pepper. While I let that heat I put the pasta in it and put a lid on that. I grab another pot and I put the tomato sauce in it. I grab onion, peppers, garlic, cilantro and any other herb I need before I take out the cutting board. I grab the lean knife in my hands and brush the top of my thumb over the edge to see if its sharp enough. Once I'm satisfied I start to cut through the veggies in small cubes to put on the sauce. I hear Alice's footsteps as she enters the kitchen. "Need any help, Bells?" she asks. I look over my shoulder giving her a small grin.

"I'm fine baby, if you want you can tidy up the house. I'm afraid it's not exactly presentable... and fix up a guest room, I don't think Ness's mom will be home early." I say. I hear her soft laugh "I already did all that." she says. I smile and chuckle "Well then, by all means. Grab that long loaf of bread and start to slice it up, not to thick, not to thin." I say as I return my attention to chopping the green leafs. I pour all the diced veggies and stuff in to the red tomato sauce before I stir it and adjust the heat.

I check the pasta to see it boiling softly. I nod to myself slowly as I take out a bowl and marinade the meatballs. I look over at Alice to see her done with her task. I smile a bit "Ok, Alice. I want you to crush some garlic and put the crushed garlic in olive oil. Then you're going to mix that." I say and she nods her head with a smile. "I like cooking, it feels like were... oh, um..." Alice trails off and I chuckle at her.

"Like were married?" I ask with a twitch of my lips. Alice nods once and smiles a bit. I wipe my hands off a towel and over to Alice and wrap my arms around her waist "there is nothing I would rather do in the future then make you my wife. I just can't help fear that something similar to what happened will happen again." I say as I hug her to me.

I feel Alice lean in to me and her head turns to look at me from over her shoulder. She sends a bright smile my way "I would love to be your wife, and to be able to call you my wife one day." Alice says quietly. I lean forward for a quick kiss.

"And... I understand your worry, trust me. I do, Bella. I have the same worry that something will get in the way of us again, but there is something I am one hundred percent sure this time." she says as she turns in my arms to face me. "If that ever happens again, I won't let you go without a fight. I won't let you shoulder the blame for anything, it was my mistake once and I won't do it again." Alice speaks strongly.

I laugh as I give her a soft Eskimo kiss. "Nothing will happen again... and this only means I have to propose again." I say with a grin. Alice shakes her head "If anything, it's my turn to propose." she says. I shake my head and give her a kiss "Silly girl." I mumble before pulling away "Im the dude, remember?" i ask jokingly. Alice roles her eyes and I check the sauce, pasta and meat. Once I make sure nothing is burning I walk over to her and see as she places the pieces of bread on the cooking paper on the metal pan. Once she has all the bread on the paper I kiss her cheek and hand her a brush. "Dip it in the oil garlic mix and brush it lightly over the bread." I say to her ear as I pull her body against mine as I rest my head on her shoulder to watch her.

Once she is done I kiss her neck "There is no oil left, so you can just pick up pieces of the garlic and place it on the bread to make it cook with it." I say my eyes closed as I hum as the peaceful sizzling of meet enter my ears and the smells of food waft through the house. I pull away from Alice as I go to stir the pasta. I take the wooden spoon and dip it in my sauce and taste it. Yum. "Ali, taste this." I say as she walks over with the pan of bread, she takes a taste.

A moan escapes Alice and I laugh as I stir. Alice places the pan in the oven and groans "Bella that was really good." she says. I laugh "That's what she said." i say as I add a bit of salt and pepper to the sauce. "So what time is your family getting here?" I ask after Alice hit the back of my head. "They said there would be here in an hour, it's been around... forty minutes. So they won't be long." Alice says. I nod and see that the pasta is already fully cooked. I nod to myself as I get the colander out and spill the pasta in to it, draining it of water out. I grab the pan of meat and pour the pasta on that. I cook it slowly "What are you doing?" Alice asks.

I look at her "Um, old Italian secret." I say sticking my tongue out at her. After I cook the pasta with the meat I pour it in to the sauce and slowly cook it again. I turn off the heat just as the doorbell rings. I wipe my hands and walk over to the door, "Take the bread out of the oven, it's going to burn if it stays in any longer." I sat to Alice and she nods as I walk over to the door.

I grab the handle and twist it, opening the door. I smile at the Cullen's clad in coats as the storm outside crashes down. "Welcome." I say and they smile "Thank you, it's a pleasure." Esme says as she walks in. I nod to the rest giving them all kind smiles "Bella, we found something of yours on our way over. Pour thing was getting soaked in the rain." Esme says.

I frown "Something of mine?.." I ask trailing off as the soaking wet form of my baby sister shivering comes to my view. My eyes go wide as I pull her inside "Ness? What the hell? Why are you soaking wet?" I ask taking off my jacket. The only thing on my mind to make sure she doesn't get sick. "C-calm-m-m you-re-e hor-sess-s-s. I-I-I'm f-f-fine." she stutters threw chattering teeth. Her lips are blue, shit that rain must be freezing!

"Are you stupid? Why didn't you call me?" I ask draping my jacket over her rubbing her arms to keep her warm. "P-phon-ne got-t-t we-et." she mumbles. I fix a glare on her "Renesmee Valentine Swan, get your but upstairs and in to a shower." I say pointing to the stairs. "N-n-no way." She says. I clench my jaw and lean down so that I'm her same height "Look, your freezing you're nonexistent but off. You're lips are blue and if you keep chattering your teeth you won't have any left. Now, get in a shower warm up, and I'll be right up to lend you some clothes." I say my voice firm.

"But-" I cut her off. "No, buts. And's or ifs. Now get you but in a shower!" I say firmly. Her shoulders slump before she starts a squeaky, mushy pace up the stairs. "C-c-can't I at least say Hi-i-i to Ali-ce, first?" Ness asks half way up the stairs. I sigh "Alice!" I call rolling my eyes at my sister's grin. I look at the Cullen's who are looking on at us with amusement. Alice walks in and smiles at her family "Hey, guys. What's up- Ness what the hell! Your soaking wet! You should be in a shower! Bella, what has gotten in to you? She's freezing and your calling me up?" Alice asks kind of glaring at me as she walks over to Ness.

I stare at Ness to see her hiding a small grin as the rest of the Cullens laugh at me. "But!... I.. I told her to go take a shower!" I say pointing at her. Alice rolls her eyes at me "Suuure you did, Bell. Sure you did." Alice says as she drags Ness up with her. I huff once there out of sight, "The hell was that?" I ask as I look at the Cullens who are now laughing and smirking.

I huff "Shut up, dinner is almost ready... want to sit down for a bit?" I ask pointing to the living room. The Cullens chuckle and walk through with me leading the way. I feel Emmetts hand on my back, patting me. "There, there Bell. It's a woman thing. They care for the children first." he says. I huff "It's stupid, I told Ness to take a shower." I grumble. Emmett booms out a laugh and Esme sighs as she hugs me with one arm "Don't worry dear, I'm sure Alice was just teasing you." she says.

I smile a bit and run a hand threw my hair with a shrug as we all take seats. I smile at all of them "So, how have you all been?" I ask rubbing my hands together. It was getting chilly fast. I stand and throw two logs in the fireplace. "Oh, nothing new. Do you need help with that?" Em asks. I shake my head as I flip the switch. I hear the click of the gas starting up and the fire catching smoothly. "Oh, that would come in handy." Carlisle says. I smile a bit to myself "I ordered it, if you want I can give you the number." I offer as I switch the flip back down leaving only the fire wood burning.

"That would be very generous of you, Bella." he says with a nod. I nod back and I hear steps coming down the stairs. "Um, so how are things going at the hospital?" I ask Carlisle. "Oh... everything is doing well. I'm currently working on a case where the woman has amnesia." he says. I nod and shrug "Must be relaxing." I mumble to myself quietly as I run a hand threw my hair "Must be sad... not remembering... pasts." I mumble halfheartedly. But something catches my eye, the way Rosalie looked at me before rolling her eyes.

"I on the other hand, would love the chance. If only for a while." Rose says. I lift an eyebrow in surprise "What?" I ask. She shrugs "I think it would be... relaxing to not remember the past for a bit of time... maybe even permanently." Rose says. My eyes lock with hers, is she for real? Why would the perfect Rosalie Hale Cullen want that?

"Please, princess. I'm afraid your life has been a field of daisies." I say with a soft teasing smile. Rose scoffs "Like you know anything of my life." she says her voice a bit hard. I shrug "You've never given me the chance to, now have you?" I ask with a raised eyebrow at her. Her mouth opens but I shake my head at her with a bit of a smile on my lips. I turn to continue speaking with the Cullen's, where the hell is Alice? why did she leave me alone with her family?

"So, how's your ego after my sister crushed you playing?" I ask Emmett laughing at his pout. "Hey! She did not crush me!" Emmett says. "Yeah, right. I owned you." Ness says walking in to the living room with my clothes. I stare in shock as I see... that for all intents and purposes she looks like a younger me.. I identically. My mouth must look like a fish seeing as Alice is smirking at me.

"Close your mouth big sis. Flies can enter." she says. I smirk "That's funny, the only pest I see is in front of me." I say standing up with a teasing smirk. She huffs "Shut up." she says. "Aww, dweed lwillow Nessie wessy get sad?" I as in a baby tone. She glares at me as I lean forward and ruffle her hair before placing a kiss on the top of her head "Chin up kid, you are after all a Swan." I say as my finger pushes her chin up as I make my way to Alice. "That was a pleasant surprise." I say as I kiss her chastely. She nods and I look at the family "Dinner is ready, now.. If you would all be so kind as to fallow me." I say and everyone stands up to fallow us.

I give a small smile to Rose when she walks closer to me "It's really something to see you so attune with her." she comments. I shrug "It really just came naturally... before I met Ness... I was scared shitless I would screw up." I admit. Rose laughs and pats my shoulder twice "Well, from one big sister to another. You are doing a great job, Bell." Rose says with a kind smile. I smile back at her "Thanks, Rose... that means a lot coming from you. Alice always brags about how great a big sister you are.. And how you're her best friend... I can only hope Ness will see me like that one day." I say with a shrug.

Rose smiles at me "If I didn't know any better I would say that girl looks up to you Bella." Rose says. I run a hand threw my hair and shrug "You never know." I say as we join the others in the kitchen. We had stayed in the foyer talking but now joined in the family dinner. I grab the bowl containing the pasta and Alice the one with the baked bread and we place it on the table. I grab the salad Alice was so wonderful of making, I had forgotten to get to it.

A pitcher of juice and water was in the table and two cups of whine at the end corner where Carlisle and Esme were seated. I nod slowly as I take a seat at the head of the table. Alice on my left and Ness at my right. Next to Alice was Edward and Jazz. At Ness's was Emmett and Rose and next to Jazz was Esme, Carlisle at the other end of the table.

"Well, um.. Dig in." I say and Ness raises an eyebrow. And I suppress a groan "Ness, I'm not religious." I state putting my elbow on the table to rest my head when Alice pushes it and my face almost slams in the table much to Emmett and the rest of the Cullens entertainment. "But, I am. Come on sis, humor me." she says. I sigh "Fine, you pray to your God." I say waving a hand in dismiss.

Ness frowns again and mouths the word 'my god?' and gives me a perplexed look. I ignore it as I stand from the table and go to the fridge where there is around three six packs of beer, I take one out. "I don't know about you people, but I will need this." I say as I crack it open and walk back over to the table. Alice shoots me glares but I shrug it off as I take three long gulps of my beer and place the can next to my glass of water.

"Go on, I'm seated." I state. "Stop being suck a prick." Alice says lowly, I shrug and Ness ignores us as she starts on praying about thank him for the food and what not. God? I cooked it! but I guess I know what she means. I think she means the overall meaning of having food to eat, un like the kids in Africa. Hmm.. remind me to call Bill Gates to talk to him about his charity. After it's done everyone makes a cross symbol and I just stare perplexed at them, I think mom used to.. NO, Bella.

I shake my head and lift an eyebrow at Alice, "May, I eat now?" I ask. She sighs but nods and I take a meat ball and take a bite out of it. I hear moans of approval over my food and shift in my seat. "Bella this taste wonderful." Esme says. I shrug "it's just spaghetti." I mumble. "You must had added something, normal spaghetti doesn't taste this good." Jazz says. I shrug ducking my head a bit "It's just plain spaghetti... I've made it all my life." I say and Alice pats my arm.

"Ignore her, she is being bashful. She made the sauce from scratch. Only tomato sauce and she added the rest. She marinated the meat balls and cooked them separately from he sauce before cooking everything together for the final minutes." Alice says. I take a bite of the garlic bread Alice maid. "Alice maid the bread." I say and she rolls her eyes "Your recipe." she says. I role my eyes with a hint of a smile "There isn't a recipe, I was joking. It's just pasta. My mother used to make it and then my father after her and he showed me." I say with a shrug shifting in my seat again, my parents are always an uncomfortable topic.

"Well, her name is Isabella. Must be an Italia secret." Edward says with a shrug. I role my eyes "Yeah, and Chef Boyardee was my great uncle." I say and the table laughs. Ness speaks up "Can you teach me how to make this?... mom comes home from work late sometimes and it would be nice to great her with something other than mac and cheese and microwave dinners." she says.

I feel a grin touch my lips as I nod "Sure, Ness. I'll teach you one of these days." I say and look to Esme "I'll give you the recipe. It's not a big secret, just fresh ingredients." I say as I take a bite of food. Rosalie laughs softly "You are so odd Bella Swan." she states with a smile. I frown "How so, Miss Hale?" I ask. "Oh, so we are going formal now?" she asks with a blond eyebrow raised.

I shrug "If the shoe fits..." I trail off and she laughs "Anyway Miss, Swan. I was just informing you that you are odd. One second you are confident and outgoing. The next you are shy and bashful." Rose says. I mask quickly the unsettling feeling in me. "Um... alright." I mumble looking down taking another drink of my beer. I look threw my bangs to see Rosalie frown and Alice shoot her a glare, I clear my thought putting up a mask. "I think it's refreshing to do so, Rose. Maybe you should try it instead of being the ice queen?" I ask putting a wink so that she understood I was being playful.

Ness chuckles "Please, I don't think Rosalie could ever release her crown." she scoffs. I chuckle and turn to Ness "What about you kid? want a peace of this?" I tease making the 'come at me' sign with my fingers. She smirks "It's not you, I want a piece of." she says and her eyes quickly flick to Rose. Me, Emmett, Alice, Jazz and Edward boom out laughs as Rose frowns in confusion and Esme and Carlisle smile at our odd behavior.

"She is definitely you're sister." Edward says between laughs. I grin at Ness "I think so too." I say and give ness a wink. She grins at me and the rest of dinner is passed like this. Playful banter every once in a while and speaking politely. Once dinner was done Alice escorted everyone to the living room as me and Ness picked up the dishes and put them in the dish washer.

"I like Alice's family, there fun." Ness says. I smirk and nod "Yeah, they seem to be finally warming up to me." I mumble as I place the last of the plates in the dish washer as I start to was my hands. Ness chuckles "you really are odd." Ness says as I step away and she steps front to wash her hands. I grab the pig pin of ice cream from the fridge and shrug "well, if I'm so odd maybe I'll leave a certain girl without desert." I say with a shrug. Ness pouts "Aww, come on! I even ate all the salad!" she says. I laugh softly and grab nine ice cream bowls and start serving it. I put an extra scoop in Ness before adding chocolate syrup and whipped cream to them. I take out a small bag of cherries I had saved up for Sunday, Sunday's but eh, I could just buy more. I poured a bit more syrup and then sprinkles before fixing a spoon on each bowl. I hand Ness her bowl and wink at her as I grab the large trey and walk over to the living room.

Once there everyone grabs a bowl and only mine is left. I grab it and start to nibble at it as Esme tells me about how she was fixing up a mansion and Emmett thought it would be fun to have this paintball game the night before they started painting. I was laughing and chuckling up until the very end. Once the story was finished I stood up and Rose offered to help me take the bowls back.

I shrugged, Rose seems to want to talk to me about something. As soon as we are in the kitchen I speak "I'm not cheating on your sister, I love her and I haven't laid a single -angry- hand on her." I reply automatically. The memory of all those 'conversations' we had wile me and Alice were still beginning our dating time flashed behind me eyes. "I... I wasn't going to ask you that." Rose says softly. I frown "oh, then... what is it you want to talk about?" I ask. Rose sighs and runs a hand threw her long hair, her blue eyes taking some kind of shadow to them.

"I want to confess to you why it is I didn't like you when we first moved here." she says. I lift an eyebrow and nod "alright... um, do you mind if we head out to the porch? I need a smoke." I say. She nods and gives me a small smile "I'll probably need one two." she says and I nod as me and Rose make our way to the front door. I hand her, her coat and I slip on mine as Alice walks over to us, "you leaving?" she ask sadly to Rose.

Rose shakes her head "No, me and Bella are just heading out for a smoke break. keep the rest of the family entertained, we will join you soon enough." Rose says. Alice nods twice and kisses me on the cheek. I grin as I step out to the freezing night "Sheesh, you wouldn't believe its supposed to be summer." I mumble out and Rose laughs in consent. We walk over to the bench I have on the porch and Rose takes perch on the porch swing.

I take out the box and after taking one out, I offer the box to her. She grabs it and takes one out, she sniffs it and grins. "I'll have to remember these are Alice's brand. No wonder she likes them so much, they smell amazing." she says. I shrug. "They are my favorite." I say as I light up. Rose nods and I hand her the lighter as I take a drag of my cig. A little shiver of bliss running up my spine at the feeling of nicotine.

After a few drags Rose looks back at me, her gaze having been focused on the general area of the moon. She lets out a shaky sigh "The reason I had a trouble trusting you Bella, is because I have trouble trusting people period. I don't like change, never have and I don't think I ever will." she states.

I frown, I don't know why but now I have a bad feeling about this conversation. "What do you mean? Why do you have a difficult time trusting people?" I ask unable to help myself. The nagging feeling telling me to shut up, but the person... the friend to Rosalie in me wants her to trust me. I want her to trust me enough to tell me about this. Hell, if anyone can understand trust issues, it's me. "Bella... do you know why it is that I was sent to foster care? Why me and Jazz were adopted by Carlisle and Esme?" she asks.

I shrug. "You're parents kept you out of school for a year, you and Jazz where removed for negligence." I say with a shrug. She smirks to herself before shaking her head, her golden tresses shaking alongside her head. "That is the story we give every town, Bella... the real reason... the real reason that me and Jazz where removed from our parents was because... they physically abused me and Jazz." she says coldly.

My veins run cold, but I shake my head furiously. No, this can't happen to her. Nah, no. I bet she means her parents beat her up... shit, that's not good either. But it's better than what happened to me. Fuck no, damn it! "W-went you say... um, physically abused.. you mean you guys got beat up right?" I ask softly.

My muscles were tense, my jaw shaking with the adrenaline suddenly in my system. Rose looks into my eyes for a long moment before taking a drag and with the puff of smoke, comes her response. "On the lucky days we could get away with a few hits, on the worst we were lucky to get out with black eyes and busted lips... on the terrible days... I honestly wish I would have died." she says, her ice blue eyes trapping mine. I clench my jaw and my fist clench, the cig in my lips glows with the long drag I take.

Fuck no. Not Alice's big sister. No way. I shake my head. "Your lying." I say around the cig. "That's not a funny joke, Rosalie." I say looking at her. Her eyes soften, and for once I feel like she's really seeing me, the real me – the one I hide and restrain and struggle to control sometimes. "It's not a joke Bella." she says softly. I clench my jaw tightly my anger burning through my senses "Rosalie, knock it off." I warn my voice wavering in anger. No, not her! Damn it! She lifts a golden eyebrow "Why would I lie about being raped by my father?" she ask in a tone so defeated, angry and haunted that had me looking at the pitch black night in a haze of heated fury.

No, no, no, no, no, no, NO! Not Alice's sister. Rosalie, no matter how protective and annoying, doesn't deserve that to happen to her. No girl ever could deserve it. The cold air finally coming in handy to sooth my heated skin as I try to reel in my anger. "Rosalie, please... please tell me you're just playing a cruel joke on me." I say softly, my anger sizzling in to nothingness. I feel her soft hand on my shoulder. "No, Bella. I'm not." she says, but I know from her tone how much she wishes that she was. I can't handle the physical contact right now. Not when I already had a flashback of my own, today, and now with my rage over this. I take a few steps away from her. I didn't feel disgusted by Rose. How could I?

Heavens no, if anything for the first time ever I wanted to grab her in a hug. I wanted to cradle the tall girl to make sure she was alright, but my anger was taking the best of me and I didn't want to be close to her just in case I snapped, and that was a very real possibility at the moment. "How, when..." I trail off in the nagging hole in my chest grew a size. "My father first started with beating me and Jazz up. He thought it was so hysterical the way Jazz would try to fight him back to make sure he didn't get to me... he would beat us at holidays or summer. When no one was around to notice the cuts and bruises." Rose mumbles softly. I look over to her and I sit next to her on the porch swing.

I think I have a grasp on my anger. God, please. If this is one of your jokes, knock it off!

**A/N: oh! about time huh? next chap has a Rose pov and stuff. Have fun reading! Review! CHECK THE POLL ON MY PROFILE! yOU WILL KNOW WHY!  
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	77. Chapter 77

**A/N: here it is! Short A/N to get to the point. Just remember to vote! The chap with the summary's has been deleted. If you want to read the summarys and what not, its in my bio. Vote for you're fave story summary! and just if you were all wondering, every single sumary will be a story in due time. I just wanted to know witch of all is the first to write. have fun reading.!**

**co written with: A Thousand Undiscovered Stars, best beta ever in my opinion! **

**I don't own twilight.**

**Ch.77**

**RosePov**

I'm a little surprised when Bella sits next to me and gives my hand a reassuring squeeze. Her jaw is still tense; it's understandable. I had a similar reaction when Alice told me her story. I take a shaky breath and I surprisingly relax when Bella throws an arm on the back of where I am sitting and her dark intense eyes are staring straight at me.

I hear Bella let out a soft breath. "It's ok, Rose. It's ok. He's not here, he can't hurt you. I won't let anyone hurt you, you're safe here," she says slowly, her soft voice and comforting words actually soothing me. I give her a soft smile and she gives me a soft grin. "You don't have to tell me," she says softly. I shake my head. "I want to, I want to show you, that I trust you now." I say slowly. She nods. "Go ahead, I'm here for you," she says and I bite my lips as I think about where to start. After holding it in for so long with everyone but my family – and usually including my family – I had no idea really what to say, how to explain.

"My father... Royce King III was a sick and twisted man. Our family came from old money... all that vanished in the Great Depression. All of it... and I guess that when I was growing up... he invested the last few dollars in a broken bargain. He was left with nothing, and he had to learn to work. He was a... pathetic man, to tell you the truth. Sick, demented... but most of all pathetic. My Mother had been the typical 'you need to find a man with money, because you are so beautiful' type of mom." I start struggling to remember correctly. I spent so long trying to block it all out that it's a difficult to think about, now.

"She wasn't abusive... but she was submissive and in my book that was just as bad. If my father told her to walk out of the room, she would do it. even knowing that we were going to be unjustly beaten. She would take care of us, though... as if that would make up for her sins. She would give us pain medication, clean our cuts, fix us up and always... She would always tell us 'You must understand, children. Your father is not an evil man, he is just distraught... You must try your best not to make him upset. Now come, I'll find you something new to wear.' Oh, how I hated when she said that." I growl out and I feel Bella's arm tentatively go to my shoulder.

I let out a soft breath escape me. Relax, Rose, I tell myself. "One night... my mom left. No word to my father or to us, she just up and left. That day was the first day to the worst year of my life. My father wouldn't let us go to school, our only escape form that hell hole. Jazz was forced to..." my voice trails off as I clear the lump in my throat. I hated thinking about what my brother went through.

"He was shunned. He was my father's personal punching bag and Jazz, no matter how much I fought with him, wouldn't let me take a few hits... I was older than him, but he was always the gentleman. If you look closely... you can see Jazz's scars. My dad threw bottles at him," I admit and I register Bella's soft shudder of breath as she pulls me tightly to her side. I let her because it feels good knowing that she's not just pitying me or sympathizing with me – she's _empathizing _with me. And, as much as I hate that she went through that as well, it feels good to know that I can talk to someone who can genuinely say that they know what it's like. "It's ok, he's ok," she mumbles and I stay still in her hold.

I don't think I ever realized that the air that surrounded Bella was so... warm, protective. The girl was an inch, maybe even just a few centimeters taller than me, yet right now I felt completely safe. How is that even possible? "One night, Dad went too far. He knocked Jazz unconscious and I snapped. I threw bottles at our father. One of them hit his face and broke, slashing his eyebrow and scraping his face. I had been ecstatic at the sound of his yell," I say with a smirk. I can remember that sound and it brings me pleasure knowing I brought him some small measure of the pain that he inflicted upon us.

"His yell, I relished. I continued to throw bottles at him, I didn't relent until there was only a plastic bottle of rubbing alcohol me and Jazz used to clean our cuts up. I threw it in my dad's face and ran to Jazz. I remember shaking Jazz and slowly he started to wake up. I dragged him to the door and pushed him out of it before the door slammed shut and Royce launched me across the room and into the glass table. It didn't shatter, much to his anger. I remember laughing at him, taunting him. Telling him he couldn't even hurt a person the right way... I remember I was just buying Jazz time. Time to wake up and walk to our neighbor's house and get help, it had always been a plan that if he ever snapped we would find help." I say as a cold shudder runs threw me. My breathing speeds up the tiniest bit and I can feel myself tense slightly. The memories are strong in my mind and I fight not to let them take over, Bella's presence anchoring me to the present in a way that I'm incredibly grateful for.

Bella doesn't move to touch me anymore then her arm on my shoulders and my head resting on her shoulder as she slowly rocks us on the porch swing. I was thankful. It seems like we both knew what was going to happen. "My father hit me, then. Harder than he ever had, I realized he had held back when hitting me. I remember my head swirling and blanking out for a few minutes to wake up with my father dragging me by my hair to his ... room. I knew what..." I trail off as I let out a long breath.

I hear a mangled whimper escape Bella as she pulls me to her tightly. I'm surprised she is even still holding me, but glad. Oh, yes, I'm glad. I shudder once. This mustn't be easy for her. Me recalling my past must bring back parts of her own, and I know from experience that the memories can be just as bad as the original. Being forced to relive it over and over again… I swallowed thickly. "You know what happens next..." I whisper. Bella hides her head in my neck as I feel her shoulder shake quickly as she struggles to hold in her sadness.

"It's ok, Rose. You're here now," she mumbles as my shoulders shake. How could I have been so cruel to her before? I can see now what Alice meant when she said that Bella protected her. She didn't just mean that she physically kept her from harm – she meant that she protected her in every sense of the word, be it physically, emotionally, or otherwise. She pulls me to her side and kind of tucks me protectively into her side and I take a deep breath as a small measure of safety and warmth washes over me. "I... I passed out after he was done... the blood loss being a bit too much. I woke up in a hospital room, Jazz in the bed next to me. Cops entered our room, a woman thank God... and we were informed that our father took his own life... He was on meth and it caused him to have these hallucinations, and supposedly that's what happened that night... Me and Jazz know better. He was a sick son of a bitch and took his own life because he would rather die than rot in a jail cell the way that he should have after what he did," I hiss out, hate coursing through my veins.

Me and Bella sit in silence, her analyzing what I had just said and me, shaking off the numbness that consumed me. "You... are one strong, brave, and beautiful girl, Rose. You know that, and you better not forget it," Bella says as she pulls away from our embrace to look me in the eyes with determination. "You got that?" she asks. I give her a weak smile. I do know it, it's true, but it means a lot to hear that from her when I know what she's been through. _Everything _that she's been through. "Thank you, Bella," I say softly. Bella shakes her head. "Thank you, Rose. For trusting me," she says. I give her a smile. I realize now that I should have trusted her long ago. It feels strange to say, but I feel somehow… lighter after talking to her. "Thank you for listening. For some reason I feared you wouldn't listen," I say softly. And it was true.

Bella shakes her head at me. "How could I not... We share something in common... and somehow I know that you know," Bella says her eyes burning mine in her intense search. I admit I'm not surprised she figured it out. From what Alice told us and from the way that she speaks and acts sometimes, she is extremely intelligent. "Not many people are as guarded as we, who share the same fate," I say with a shrug. I know that if Bella figures out Alice told us... there is no telling what she will do. She is in control for the most part, but something as big as this... Bella would really crack...

"Rose… can I ask how… How old were you?" she asks quietly and I glance at her as I answer bitterly. "Nine," I say quietly and I see her clench her jaw and the dark flames in her eyes. But she never releases her hold on me and that feels good.

I felt her take a deep breath beside me and when I glanced over I could see the determined look in her eyes. "Rose… would you listen to my story?" she asked, searching my eyes for any sign of discomfort or reluctance on my part, I assumed. She wouldn't find any. I gave a small half-smile. Alice had told us the facts, but I knew just how different it could be to actually hear it first-hand and I wanted to know what it was truly like for her. "Of course, Bella," I murmured truthfully and she took a deep breath, running her hand through her hair and frowning thoughtfully before sighing.

"Well, to start with, you should know that I didn't move here just to get treatment for my dad," she says, and as she speaks I can see it, hear it. Her voice grows colder, to the point where she almost sounds dead – frozen alive. And her eyes darken from the memories, all of the feeling, all the emotion going out of them. I freeze. Shit… She looks… haunted. Just like me but, somehow, worse.

"Three years ago… I… I was hanging out with my best friend Connor." She hisses out his name and I clench my jaw. Alice told us his name before, the fucking bastard. I feel her tense and, seemingly without being aware of what she's doing, Bella shifts slightly further away from me around an inch or two away between us. "We were at a party and we had raided the houses liquor stash. Well, I had a girlfriend at that time -her name was Veronica- and well. I was with her at that party, I was having a blast," she says, the corners of her lips pulled up into a caustic smirk. I stay silent. I want to comfort her, but I can tell from the way that she pulled back slightly that my touch would likely not be welcomed right now – in fact, no one but Alice or Renesmee could probably get away with touching her at the moment – so I stay where I am, simply listening.

"I was cracking jokes, hanging out with my best friend and my girlfriend. Things couldn't get better. Soon it was time to go home and well, me and Connor didn't feel like going home so, I took Veronica to her house, me being protective." she says with a dark chuckle "I ignored her, we wanted to drink and keep on having a good time." she says, her jaw clenched before she lets out a single low, harsh laugh. "Oh, yeah, we had a good time alright," she mutters darkly and I grimace.

"Veronica had asked me to stay, saying she wanted to… you know. And that she had a bad feeling. I just guessing she wanted to fuck and brushed her off with a promise to be back later. She smiled contently and we kissed and exchanged 'I love you's' before I walked down the street with Connor," she says coldly, her fists clenched now. I take a deep breath. I know what's coming next. I can feel it even if Alice didn't already give us an overview. And I was right. It's different hearing it from her – it's worse.

"Um, we walked to a building site around two blocks away downtown. No one would hear us laughing and what not if we were drunk. It was one of our usual hang outs so I just assumed it was safe. Well… that night. It wasn't." Her voice is quieter now but no less chilled and I can hear the danger in her voice. Yet somehow… I still feel that overwhelming feeling of safety from before. It's almost like I know how dangerous she can be and it makes me feel more safe because she knows what it's like and she wouldn't let anything like that happen to me again, no matter how little we've gotten along in the past – all of which is admittedly more my fault than hers.

Still, I can't help but wonder how long it's been since someone made her feel that safe. My mind flashes back to what she said to Alice that day on the porch when we first found out about her past.

_Flashback._

_"All my life, I knew letting feeling out was something I could never do. So, I never showed emotion. I parted from them, then people started saying that it would hurt me in the end if I kept doing that. That feelings had to be expressed and that it would hurt me if I never felt anything. So, Alice. I want to know what the hell is so great about feeling? Honestly, tell me right now. Because all I feel, all I have always felt is fury and pain. And I was a fool to think that I could actually fall in love, I'm too damaged." Bella rants. At the beginning her voice had started out angry but at the end it became soft._

_"You should listen to your father and stop acting like a little spoiled brat," she says and I can see Alice's hands ball into fists. "I'll stop when you stop acting like a scared child and let your true self come out," she quips and you can see the fury in Bella's eyes at those words. "I grew up the day I saw my mom get killed! The day I had to take care of my drunk of a father and the day I saw him die! And I sure as hell grew up the day that fucker raped me!" Bella snaps and I freeze… What?_

_No. No way. Absolutely not. Not Bella Swan of all people. But somehow, in the back of my mind, I know that it's true. Because it would explain everything. The way she acts when people start clinging to her, the way she doesn't let anyone in, everything. But no. It can't be. Can it? "Don't you ever dare tell me to grow up. I've been taking care of myself since I was ten, Alice. Ten years old. You think you're hurt? You don't even know what hurt feels like, Alice. So stop acting like you're in this stupid fairytale and that a person can come here and make it all better because no one will show up and you will be disappointed time and time again. Ask anyone and they'll tell you - I'm that person that will keep letting you down," she says more softly and I can see in her eyes that she genuinely believes it to be true._

_End Flashback._

Oh, God… Ten years old. She grew up when she was fucking ten years old. I know the feeling so I know just how much it can fuck you up having to grow up that early. But still, it was different for me. For Bella to go that long without ever having someone to really comfort her, make sure she was okay. Being forced to be the one to look after her own parent when she should still have been the child… I can't imagine what it's like. I went through hell with my birth family, but when Esme and Carlisle – my real Mom and Dad – adopted me, I got a real family and I've had years with them doing their absolute best to take care of me while still giving me the space that I need. But Bella… She never did. And I have a feeling that's exactly why she falls so easily into the protector role. She never really had anyone to protect her, so she became the protector…

Bella's voice brings me back to the present. "We were just hanging out, getting drunk with a bottle of whiskey. We started joking around and he had asked me about why I was gay. I told him I wasn't sure that I just knew so he offered we… have sex. I turned him down, I was 'in love' with Veronica… he got angry. He started yelling at me that I was his, that he was in love with me." Her voice grows bitter and pain-filled towards the end. But it's mixed with… hate? No, not just hate. Self-hatred. I'm a little surprised. Why would she hate herself for that? I mean it's not like it's her fault… My thoughts trail off as realization comes to me and I remember the way that Ali said that she blamed herself for her mother's death. This is no different. She blames herself, for God knows what reason. I don't know why, but she thinks it's her fault that he snapped. Oh, God…

When she speaks, Bella's voice is unsteady now and I don't think I've ever heard her sound this way before. It's shocking to me although, having been through my own horrifying experience, it shouldn't be. After all, I know all about the whole 'act strong and don't let anyone see the pain' bit. But still… "W-we fought, and I don't mean. Best friend fights. No… I mean we kicked each other's asses but… he knew all my moves. He knew my weak points and he was strong. H-he said that I was his and that… I was weak. He used to call me by my full name, not liking my nickname… he said Isabella sounded classy," she stutters a little, and I can hear the disgust in her voice at the end. And now I understand why she reacts the way that she does whenever anyone calls her by her full first name. Because of him.

Bella's eyes fall shut and I can feel her entire body tense; I know that she's seeing it, living it again right now. And I fucking hate it. I can't touch her – that much is clear from her body language. But I can't just do nothing, either. "Bella," I say softly and her eyes snap open, darker than I've ever seen them before. She regards me warily and I stay as still as possible, keeping my voice soft when I speak. "It's okay. You're not alone. I'm here," I offer tentatively and she seems to struggle with herself for a moment before she relaxes ever so slightly and hesitantly leans forward to embrace me. I carefully wrap my arms around her sides, making sure not to make her feel trapped though I have no doubt that she could escape my grasp in a second if she felt inclined to. But I wanted her to feel safe with me. I wanted to protect her this time, so that she didn't have to be the one to protect someone for once, so that she didn't have to be the only one to protect _herself _for once. She sighs and a little of the tension leaves her, although her voice is still cold and lifeless when she speaks – emotionless.

"He… he was the one who raped me… He said that I would be his; that he didn't care how and that he was doing it because he fucking _loved _me," she sneered the words with quiet fury and I felt hatred and anger crashing over me. How fucking dare he?! What kind of fucked up monster has the nerve to say that they're doing something like that because they _love you?_ Royce, no matter how big of a bastard he was, never pretended to love me and Jazz – and somehow that helped.

"I wasn't always as strong as I am now. He was stronger than me and I could barely breathe from the things he did to hurt me before… He told me how weak I was, and you know what? I fucking believed it because it was true," she scoffs tonelessly and I want to argue but she doesn't give me the chance. "He beat me until I was so bad that they said I was _lucky _to live afterwards," she scornfully spat out the word 'lucky' and my eyes fell shut. I remember that feeling. That feeling like maybe it's just not worth it. Like maybe it would be better if it all just ended. And from everything that I knew, Bella had far more reason to feel that way than I did.

I heard her swallow and felt a shiver run down her spine as she stayed tense in my loose embrace. "H-He raped me. And t-that's the reason we moved. I-I couldn't be there. It-t held to many b-bad memories," she finished, stumbling over some of the last words and I felt tears burn in my eyes, a few spilling over to slide down my cheeks.

"Bella… he's in jail isn't he?" I questioned softly. I couldn't remember if Alice told us what happened to the little bastard or not.

She scoffs bitterly. "Yeah, until he's just over forty. They should have let me kill him, or at the least let Charlie kill him." she says, her voice dark and intense. I can't honestly say I disagree with her. People like him… They just don't deserve to live in my opinion. Not men who do that to women, or even some sick women who do that to other women. "Charlie... he got there, right before the bastard was done. What we both failed to realize was that he still had his knife on him; he swung it at Charlie but... Charlie beat the shit out of him... and I passed out." she says her voice filled with disgust.

I lick my dry lips. "At least your dad was there." I try to offer just to feel Bella's dark laugh rumble threw her as she slowly pulls away. "Charlie... it was like having a kid next to you. The only thing he was good for was drilling my ass right after I got out of the hospital saying 'this wouldn't have happened if you trained harder'. He blamed me. Just like Veronica did..." Bella says pulling away from me and standing. I feel my heart stop and see Bella's face break into an expression of searing pain.

Her jaw shakes with the pressure before she masks it. "What?" I ask. Bella smirks to herself, her eyes still closed. "When she found out what happened... to tell you the truth. Those three days in the hospital I spent... wanting to see her." Bella says with a soft laugh escaping her. "I wanted... so badly, to just hold her. And hear her, tell me 'I love you'." Bella says her voice cracking and wavering. But her eyes stay dry, no tears. "And when I finally do see her... she's furious with me. She thought I cheated on her, with **him.**" Bella spat her jaw clenching. "And I told her, I told her he raped me and that I loved her and she... laughed. Said I was incapable of such an emotion and that he probably didn't have to rape me to get me to sleep with him." Bella says her jaw clenched. Disgust for that girl seeps threw me. Hatred for her. How dare she say that to Bella?

"She was my first love... and my only girlfriend until Alice." Bella says but her eyes are still so dark. I see her demeanor change; her Onyx eyes lose all light as they stare at nothing over the railing. "Bella... it wasn't your fault." I say softly as I stand up. She tenses instantly. "The thing is Rosalie... it was." she says her eyes looking at me. Her eyes look so dead, it's scary but I don't move back from her.

"I tormented Connor, before he started hanging around me. He was that nice kid, with a nice house and family. He had a perfect little excuse for a life... and I chose him as my personal pet. I corrupted him. He didn't even have his first drink until he met me. He wouldn't ever curse. A kid that used to tell his mother he loved her before he left the house in the morning..." I see her shake her head as she swallows. "I turned him in to a monster. So please, Rosalie. Don't tell me it wasn't my fault, because I won't believe you." she says shaking her head as her voice breaks and she swallows deeply.

I take a tentative step and I see Bella's eyes look at me and then at my feet, contemplating. Calculating. "You should believe me, Bella. You didn't stick a gun to his head and force him. You did nothing to deserve that. He was stronger and by the looks of it, he had contemplated it before. So don't say it's your fault, he let himself change. And then he became a monster all by himself." I say, my voice hard so that it cracks through her thick skull. I see her frown slowly, her eyes getting some light back. She's coming back.

I sigh in relief and I see Bella shake her head to clear herself from her thoughts. "Now I know why Alice said we had a lot in common." Bella says with a small grimace. I nod once and Bella looks in my eyes for a long moment. "Thank you for listening." Bella says to me quietly, her body letting go of a shudder. She lights up in a quick movement and I nod at her. "How could I not?" I say trying to lighten the mood. Bella cracks a half-assed attempt of a smile. "Bella, this may not be the best time... but I want to ask you... will you tell me your story one day?" I ask. Bella frowns. "I just did." she states blowing a huge gust of smoke from her lungs.

Damn, her lungs are huge! I shake my head at my erratic thoughts. "No, I mean... you're life story. From the beginning... to now." I say with a shrug. Bella nods twice, but it's not a yes. She's thinking. He takes a long drag of her cigarette, the smell of vanilla wafting to me in a cloud of smoke. "Sure, I think we are past our secretive phase." Bella says with an easy shrug and an eye roll. I smile at her and she smiles back. "Are you... ok now?" I ask. Bella pauses to think for a second before nodding. "I was always in control Rose." Bella says softly. I shrug "Wanted to make sure." I say before taking two easy steps and pulling Bella into a hug. She tenses. "Um... Rosalie...?" Bella asks tentatively, not hugging me back. "Shh, I just want you to know... you can lean on me. You don't always have to protect you're self... I won't let anything hurt you... you're like a sister now." I say lowly to her. I'm shocked by my words but I know they are the truth. Maybe a tad late, but truth none the less.

Bella slowly wraps her arms around me, softly. Barely touching me and I hold her just as lightly. The sentiment and message is sent to us both. 'To protect and protector.' it must be some unspoken code. Bella pulls away and when I frown she shrugs. "I'm just now, getting used to um... emotional contact... It's still a bit unnerving." she admits. I choke on a laugh. "Your kidding." I state. She shrugs "Last time I had a soft loving hug before Alice was when I held my dad for the last time. Me and contact... don't get along that much." she says with a shrug.

I nod slowly. "Alright..." I say nodding and she takes and I sit on the swing smirking at her when the front door opens to show our little Alice. I look at Bella to see the final of tension leave her body and a smile to graze her lips as light reenters her eyes. "Hey, what took you two so long?" Alice asks walking over to us, or well Bella. We shrug. "Bonding," me and Bella say at the same time and smirk at one another. Alice nods and takes the cig from Bella's lips as she takes a drag and touches her lips to Bella's. "I love you," Bella mumbles, eyes closed and a small smile on her lips as she hugs Alice to her.

Alice lifts her head to blow out smoke and smiles. "I love you, more." she says and Bella's eyes open to show a happy haze in them. "That is just not possible," Bella says before she kisses Alice's cheek. Alice takes another drag and I lift an eyebrow. "Where is Emmett?" I ask, suddenly needing to feel his strong arms around me. Clingy, no. I just like the feeling of him protecting me. Alice smirks. "Getting his ass whipped by Ness," she says and I groan. "He won't shut up about this until the next rematch," I say as I stand from the porch swing. "Might as well try and trick Ness in to getting distracted so Em can win," I say with a shrug and a smirk as Bella and Alice smile at me.

"We will be just in," Alice says and after I exchange a look with Bell I walk back over to my lovely boyfriend. God, I love that man.

**Apov**

I place my hand on Bella's cheek as soon as the door closes behind us. The only light on the porch comes from the window next to the door. "Are you ok?" I ask brushing the back of my hand over her cheek. Bella's lips twitch up slowly as her eyes open to reveal the burning pools of Onyx. "I am now that I feel you here love," Bella says kissing my thumb that was brushing on her lower lip. She smiles at me lazily as she pulls my body tight against her.

Her head snuggles into my neck as she breathes in deeply and lets it go, her hot breath fanning over my neck making me shiver. Her soft chuckle is a clear sign that she realized what happened. I kiss the tip of her temple as I take the last drag the cig has to offer and flick the filter over the railing to the wet grass as I run my free hand threw her short hair. "You know I'm here if you want to talk," I say softly and I feel Bella pull away and her lips touch mine. She kisses me slowly both of her hands cupping my face as she kisses me.

I start getting lost in her kiss and soon all I can register is her. The warmth of her lips. The feel of her hair. The smooth skin. The warmth that rushes threw me completing me. We kiss for minutes... hours?... days? a decade? I can't tell. I could kiss her forever. Just kissing, I could do that for the rest of my life... but I do enjoy the sex. The love making. I just… it's awesome to know you are loved. Bella slowly pulls away from our kiss and kisses the top of my nose. "Let's get back to the guests. Once they leave and Ness is asleep... I'm making love to you all night," she promises in suck a seductive husky voice as she whispers it to my ear and kisses just below it.

She holds my hand and drags me back to our house and to the living room where I sit in her lap as we relax into the setting of family bickering. I look at Dad to see him smiling as he laughs at Ness beating Emmett. He stares at me, feeling my gaze, and smiles. He looks under me to Bella and… his smile is still in place. Dad looks back at me and winks and nods.

He accepts us, finally. Yes, he accepts Bella! Can this day get any better? Bella kisses me just below my ear before Ness hands her a controller and Bella starts cursing at the TV when she doesn't know what button to press. She pushes at random and actually kills ness by luck. "Hell yea! take that little girl!" Bella yells excitedly as she stands and points to Renesmee. Ness grins. "Two out of three," she says and Bella sits back down and starts playing again.

She goes crazy pushing buttons and seemingly she knows what she's doing because she pulls out some impressive moves. She beats Ness again and walks over to Ness and ruffles her hair before jumping back, childishly to me where she sits me on her lap and uses me as a shield to hide from Ness 'death glare' as Bella named it. Soon enough, my family has to go and after I kiss and hug everyone goodbye. After they leave, Ness claims to be beat and goes to her guest room. Then it's just me and Bella, who smiles as she walks me back to the kitchen. She takes out a bottle of fancy whine from one of the cupboards and when I touch it, it's cold. I look down to see that it's not a cupboard, it's a mini fridge, and Bella kisses me slowly. Love is all I can feel as her lips capture mine in a kiss I wish never had to end.

**A/N: what you guys think? Remember to vote on the poll. It will last a few more days before I close it. So if you forgot to vote... do it now!**


	78. Chapter 78

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry for the loooong wait. Um, I got caught up in some, um, stuff. Ok, ok. I am dating someone I'm kinda crazy about. I'll tell you more about it as this story goes on. Wolfsbane won with a total of 46 votes! So that will be the next story! Subscribe to me if you wish to be alerted of when I publish that story! ;P **

**I do not own twilight. **

**Ch.78**

**Bpov **

Life can't be too good, because when it is. Life can go down. It's weird, yet I love it. Alice maid me love life again. I've never loved life as much as I do now. It's amazing. It's crazy. She's everything to me, it's so funny that only eight months ago I could never imagine someone loving me, I couldn't love anyone.

I kiss her sweet lips as I lay her down on the bed, "I love you so much." I get out before it's over throne with a moan I bite at her lip, fighting it down. I push her down on the bed roughly pinning her body with mine "Bella... Ness is sleeping in the other room." Alice breathes lowly as I lift her leg to hook on my hip. I kiss her lips "Baby... its seven A.M, she won't wake up for a while. Now just feel." I mumble out against her neck. Alice lifts up "You're probably right." she says and grinds against me, I push against her making her hand go from my shoulder to the back of my head as a soft grunt leaves her mouth.

I hide my head against her neck and bite softly as I undo the sipper of her jeans. Sliding my hand right where she needs me hearing her whimper my name "Bella, god, don't tease me." she breathes and with a smile I attach our lips. "I won't." I say as we start to make out heavily as I start to pull her pants down. Once there on the floor and so are mine I slide out my shirt with Alice's help and I take off hers.

Were naked in seconds - skin against skin. Warmth against warmth. It's just... perfect. I sigh as I slide a finger in her but she pulls it out "Toys." she breathes and I have a grin instantly on my face as I role on my back and dig in my nightstand for exactly what she wants. I get the strap on and slide it on my hips adjusting the strap so it holds the way I want it.

I role back over to Alice to see her with a tiny smirk on her lips. I pull her legs to me "Wipe that smirk off your face, sexy." I say before connecting our lips. After I make sure it won't hurt her we start to move together in a quick pace. We continue this pace for a few minutes before Alice starts to get ruff, shit I love this girl. "Harder, Bella." Alice groans and I smile against her neck as I pull her legs over my shoulder and I move to the edge of the bed and stand there. I pull her to me roughly and lean over her legs getting in so much deeper.

Its starts to go at a wild pace Alice biting her lip to keep from yelling. The only thing I can hear are her whimpers as I push in to her over and over in hard deep thrusts. I pull her close to me "Shit... oh shit... B- B...NESS!" Alice suddenly yells and I look at her "What the fuck? Alice, I'm not Ness." I pant the sweat going down my back. "NESS!" She yells pointing to the door and my eyes go wide as I turn my head around to see Ness stood in the doorway, frozen.

Mouth open, eyes wide, looking petrified. "Fuck, Alice cover up!" I yell at her as I grab the blanket and throw it on her. I look up to the door to see it empty. "Shit, shit, shit." I say as I pull off the strap on, grab my sweat pants and a t shirt before I run down the stairs to see Ness putting on a coat to leave. "Hey, now. Stop." I say as I dash forward and slam the wooden door shut. "Ness... I..." I open my mouth and close it.

I look at the floor and look threw my bangs to see Ness with red cheeks as she scratches the back of her neck. I feel a blush creep up my cheeks "I... what did you see." I state rather then ask. "More of my sister then I ever needed to." she mumbles and I feel the head on my face get crazy hot. "Shit, Ness... I didn't know you were up. If I had.." I trail off shaking my head.

"I need a drink." I state and motion for her to fallow me as I head over to the kitchen. "Isn't it a bit early to get a drink?" she asks. I smirk "Not when you're a Swan." I state as I head over to the brandy bottle and grab two cups and pour some ice in them. I pour in till the cup is half full and slide it over to her.

"One drink won't kill you." I say and bring my drink to my lips. I see Ness hesitate before she shakes her head and downs it quickly. She makes a face and I laugh as I set my cup down "Strong?" I ask. She nods twice "Yeah, just a bit." she says and I chuckle as I pour another and down it. I sigh as I run a hand threw my hair. "Do I have to give you the talk or some shit?" I ask leaning my elbow on the counter as I rest my head in it. Tilting it slightly to look at Ness.

"No, God no. No. Mom beat you to it a couple of months ago." she says. I smirk "You didn't get a look at what me and Alice were doing a couple of months back." I say. Ness looks at me, at the bottle and pours herself another drink and downs it, smacking the glass filled with ice on the counter. I breathe out a soft laugh threw my nose before I bite my lip.

"Well... me and Alice are in to some things that... make our sex appeal more... um... ok, I'm gonna be blunt about this. We fuck like bunnies. And sometimes, there are some things that I can't do for her... that a toy can. I mean, I can give her a loooot, but sometimes, I just want to... see her and give her something that would take a bit longer for me to do." I try to formulate correctly but it all sounds like lesbians can't give on another pleasure.

I sigh and run a hand threw my hair "Bella, I get the whole toy thing. Ok?. I understand the hole sex thing and what not." she says quickly. I sigh "You could have told me that a bit earlier?" I ask fighting off a blush. "You asked me about sex. Not about toys." she states. "Smart ass." I mumble. "Bella, I get it. I... have friends.. girlfriends... um... they talk about that stuff. Not that I've ever.. um... yeah. I should... um... go." she says and stands. I sigh "You can't go, your mom is in Seattle and besides the Cullens invited us to dinner at their house." I say with a sigh.

Ness groans and clears her thought "Never speak of this?" she asks. I nod quickly "Never." I say and with a nod, not meeting each other's eyes she leaves and I pour myself another cup of brandy. Just as I finish drinking it and place the cup on the counter Alice walks in and stares at the cups. "You gave the kid a drink of brandy this early?" she asks.

I shrug "She's a Swan. She should be able to hold her liquor." I say with a small smile feeling myself relax. "Bella, you really should stop drinking so early." Alice says to me quietly. I sigh and run a hand threw my hair roughly "I know... I know, Alice. I just... I feel like I'm closer to Charlie when I do this." I stake softly. "I can... forget... you know?... I can just... blank out for a bit." I say scratching the top of my head.

"I gave up all the other stuff Alice, just... let me do this... I can't, not do this... I... working out isn't working anymore... neither is working... I can't drive fast because... I have you and ness now... I can't fight because... schools out... I can't do drugs... I threw away the cocaine when I was trying to get you back... I haven't done weed in a long time... I... I need this." I state standing up straighter as I place the cups in the sink.

"Just... let me do this." I say lowly as I look at her in the eyes. Her hands cup my face as she stands in front of me. "The pills aren't working anymore are they?" she asks. I breathe out slowly shaking my head a little. "No, they stopped working around a month ago." I say looking at the ground. "Maybe you can speak to your therapist, increase the dosage." she says.

I laugh a bit but shake my head "No... I don't want a higher dosage. I just... need to stay off it for a bit longer and go back to it. I've done this before and it's worked like magic." I say and Alice sighs and kisses my nick. "I know... just.. be careful. Ok?" she asks. I smile and kiss her lips "Always am." I say before we both start cooking breakfast.

After me and Alice finish breakfast she goes to call ness and I slip three depression pills down with juice. Ness, walks in her hair dripping from her shower. She sits down and grabs a plate full of food and starts digging in. Alice and I share a look before we start digging in.

After a minute I try and clear the air "So... um... you saw Alice naked." I state and I see Alice caught on her OJ and ness to crack up. I chuckle and Alice punches my arm "Fuck you." she says. "Well, for what I saw. insert shudder, Bella was doing the fucking." Ness comments and I boom out a laugh. "I like this girl." I say laughing. I look at Alice to see her cheeks an adorable red and I lean forward and kiss it "Were just trying to lighten the awkward air baby. Nothing wrong with me fucking you." I say lowly.

I wink as I pull away and Alice flips me off, I chuckle as I finish up my food and I tell the girls to leave it that I'll pick it up. The girls leave and I go to stand up when I stumble and fall to my knees my head spinning, I hold on to the table as to not to tip over as my head swims. After a minute or so it calms down and I slowly stand up on shaky feet.

I manage to grab the dishes and put them in the dishwasher before I make my way up to the study. I shake my head to clear it slowly before I reach to the desk compartment and take out my ash tray. I light up a cig as I start to do my paper work. I work all through the day, and before I know it lunch has passed and it's about dusk and I'm supposed to start getting ready.

I fill out the form I was working on when Alice's voice wakes me from my focus. "Bella, go take a shower and get dressed. You have been in here all day, you can't just hide from Ness forever you know." She teases as she shuts the door behind her. I laugh softly and set down the filter when I look in the ashtray to see around four or five sigs in there. Shit, I've never been a pack a day smoker. I've been through half in one day.

I shake my head as I stand up to kiss Alice's lips slowly. "I love you baby." I mumble against her lips as she smiles against them "I love you too." she say sand we walk up and I get a shower and dressed in the grey shirt, black coat, blue jeans and boots Alice picked out for me.

"I swear woman, if you pick my clothes for me. I won't know how to dress myself if I'm away." I say kissing her cheek before starting my hair. She laughs " You can always take me with you." she says and I laugh as I wink at her as I finish my 'messy sex hair' stile. But, of course... it needs a little messiness that can only be achieved one way.  
I grab Alice around the waist and pull her to me as I kiss her, she automatically puts her hands in my hair as I start to kiss she starts to knot her hand in my hair and then, I pull away and look in the mirror.

I grin, "Perfect, thank you baby." I say kissing her lips as she more or less glares at me. "Fuck, Bella." she says. I wink "What, a woman's touch is always the best for anything. It only happens that yours is the one that makes my hair look awesome." I say chuckling and duck away from her hand. "anyway, come on let's get this over with." I say and walk to the kitchen.

"Um, Alice. Why don't you meet me at the car, I have to turn off my PC." I say and she nods and her and Ness walk out the door. I head over to my office and turn off my pc, I grab the ash tray and empty it out the window and something catches my eye in the desk compartment. My silver flask.

I grab it and move it around, it still has whiskey. I slip it in my pocket with my pack of cigs and head out. I run back and quickly turn off the PC. I run back down and slide in the car and drive to the Cullen's house. As soon as we walk in the Cullen's start to be all... lovable.

"Bella, Renesmee, Alice! oh, I'm so glad you guys came over." Esme says hugging each of us. I see Rose and am a bit shocked when she gives me a soft hug, I give her a small grin and she pats ness head and gives her a soft hug before hugging Alice tightly. "Missed you baby sis." I hear her say and Carlisle walks over.

We stand facing each other and he nods "Bella." he says. I nod back "Carlisle." I say. We look in to each other's eyes for a long few seconds before he gives a curt nod and a small smile, he shake Ness hand and hug Alice. Emmett hugs me and I hug him back slowly and so on until were threw the whole family and in the living room talking. I start to feel twitchy after a few minutes I start to feel like someone is watching me. I look around the room feeling the hairs at the back of my neck standing. "Um.. can I be.. e-exc-c-c-used to the, um, restroom." I state as I stand up.

Alice looks at me and I just give her a sheepish smile as I start to walk and jog up the steps. I lock the door behind me and spray some water on my face and let it drip as I look at myself in the mirror above the sink. "Calm down… it's just the medication." I mumble and my hands start to shake. I grab a hand towel and dry my face, I clear my throat and grab the flask from my jacket packet and down two gulps and let the shiver run down my back as I walk out.

I make my way downstairs to see the Cullens walking to the kitchen. "Come on Bella, dinner is ready." Alice says and I nod as is tart to walk with them and we sit. The smell of Esme's cooking normally makes my stomach growl, today... it made my stomach churn. I look at my plate to see the only food that could ever make me feel sick. Fish.

I feel my stomach turn again and I sit a bit straighter in my seat as I try to relax enough to grab something else, like the salad. I see everyone saying grace and I shake my head from the horrible feeling the smell causes. I move my hand to cover my nose and mouth as I try to block out the smell. I don't want to offend Esme, but I don't think I can eat this.

I shake my head in time so that everyone opens their eyes after and start to eat. I look at my plate and poke at the vegetables and biscuit on my plate but don't touch the fish. "Something wrong Bella?" I hear Carlisle ask. I look up at him, "Um... no, everything is fine." I say and he looks at me before nodding to the fish. "It's good, you should eat." he says and I shake my head. "Um... I... I can't eat... fish." I say lowly biting my lips to keep the gag away.

"Why's that?" Esme asks looking worried. "Er... um... Dad may have... um… My father made me, um, gut fish for a week as a punishment." I say feeling sick. I shake my head covering my nose and mouth, "Um... yeah." I say trying to fight back memories. I look up and my eyes connect with Rose's and she lifts her eyebrow in silent question. I give her a nod and she stands from her chair and over to me. "Come on, Bella. I'm not hungry anyway, you look like you need some air." she says and I stand quickly and she walks with me outside were I take a deep breath.

I reach for my flask and open it and take two more gulps before wiping my mouth and looking at Rose. She holds her hand out and I hand it to her, she drinks a gulp and hands it back. I close it up and sit down at the small bench. "That was horrible what he did to you." Rose says. I laugh softly and nod. "Yeah, well..." I say with a shrug. Rose looks at me and I look back at her.

She grins slowly. "You are so drunk." she says and I laugh. "I'm not drunk, more or less buzzed." I say and she nods. "Ok... so... what you want to talk about?" she asks. I shrug. "Anything." I say and she chuckles as she start off about a story of Alice and Edward trying to prank Emmett and Jazz. And how she was caught in the cross fire. By the end of it, I'm gasping for air, I'm laughing so hard.

"Rose," a soft voice says from behind us. We turn and I see Esme standing in the doorway. She smiles at us while she addresses her daughter. "Darling, why don't you go inside? I'd like to speak with Bella," she said and Rose nodded, throwing a glance at me and smiling. I returned her smile though I was somewhat confused.

"Esme," I nodded to her as she stepped forward to join me on the bench, taking her daughter's place. "What is it you wish to speak with me about?" I asked curiously.

She frowned slightly. "I wanted to apologize for the way that we've all treated you," she said and my eyes widened slightly. "We never gave you a chance and got to you, so I'm sorry for that," Esme apologized and I blinked. I'm not sure what I expected, but that wasn't it.

"It's perfectly fine, Esme. I can understand that you wish to protect Alice, and I can promise you that I have every intention of shielding her from pain as much as I possibly can. I never want to see her get hurt, which is why it kills me inside whenever I unintentionally cause her any kind of pain. My sole desire is to keep her safe and happy and to love her the way that she deserves to be loved," I said strongly, meaning every word. Esme looked at me then, almost searchingly. I don't know what she found, but it seemed to please her as she smiled softly.

A question flickered in my mind. I'm not sure if I should ask but I decide to go ahead anyway. "If I may, how is it that you knew Alice and I had gotten engaged?" I asked cautiously and Esme seems startled before her expression calms and she smiles sardonically. "It would appear that something happened at the charity event you attended, and you and Alice were photographed. I saw the ring on her hand and the article speculated about a possible engagement. You made the front page, actually," she says wryly and I groan quietly. "Of course," I mutter to myself.

I look back to Alice's mother and frown slightly. "I apologize for that. Ideally, you and Carlisle should have been the first to know, as Alice's parents. Truly, I did not mean for you to find out that way," I said sincerely and Esme sighed, running a hand through her hair before she nodded and turned to face me once more.

**Esmepov**

I sighed, running a hand through my hair before I turned back to the young woman seated beside me. I still wasn't thrilled that the two of them had gotten engaged in the first place, but they were of legal age and I could see that they did love each other so I chose to cast it from my mind for now. It had been bothering me for a while now the way that Bella grew up so quickly. I knew what Alice had told us and I could infer a few things from Bella's own comments every now and then, but I wanted to know more than that.

"Bella… Would you explain something you said once, please?" I requested and she nodded. I could see the curiosity in her eyes. Hmm. I never realized how expressive her eyes were. I almost chuckled. That was probably why she always wore those sunglasses that Alice hated so much. "You said that you never really had a family," I began cautiously and I could see the instant her walls started going back up, although I could tell that she was at least still willing to listen. "What did you mean by that, exactly?"

Bella sighed, glancing out over the yard as she clenched her jaw, seemingly deliberating about whether or not to answer or perhaps how to answer me. "I did say that, didn't I?" she asked quietly, chuckling softly. "Esme, my upbringing was in no way conventional. Charlie was always a workaholic who spent about as much time at home a year as most people spend on vacation a year. So, that left me with my mom." Her voice grew softer when she spoke of her mother and my heart ached for the poor girl. She may have access to all of the material things in life, but the bond between a mother and daughter went beyond all that. "She…" Bella chuckled humorlessly, swallowing before speaking again. "She's been the only person throughout my entire life, other than Alice of course, who's ever really taken care of me," she confessed quietly and I was stunned. I knew that she lost her parents, but… To have no one take care of her, ever? "And even when Charlie was around it still wasn't like a real family. It was always just… not right, somehow," she shrugged and I frowned. Bella gritted her teeth for a moment and I could guess what was coming next.

"And then she died when I was ten years old," Bella's voice was bleak as she spoke. "After that, Charlie was home but he didn't take care of me. I took care of him in all the ways that mattered. That's just the way that it was. Charlie's been my Drill Sergeant, my Trainer, and my Protector but he was only very rarely my Dad. He was a good man, but he just wasn't really cut out for the whole Dad thing," she said, shrugging once more and my eyes fell shut for a moment. Oh, how very badly I had misjudged this girl…

"I never had any other relatives. After Charlie died, as I told you, I bribed the necessary people to ensure that I would be left alone. I had been taking care of myself since I was ten years old and I saw no reason to stop then," she concluded grimly and I shook my head. I could see the repressed pain in her eyes and I very, very hesitantly asked my next question.

"Bella… Bella, how did your mother die?" I asked softly. I knew the answer of course, but she needed to talk to someone about it. She needed to let it out, even if she didn't know that she needed it. Bella's eyes fell closed when I asked my question. At first, I wasn't sure if she would answer but eventually she began to speak.

"I was ten years old. I wanted to go to the park that day… Mom said no at first, but she never could resist doing something to make me happy so I pushed harder." I could hear the guilt that saturated every word she spoke and it broke my heart to hear it. "Later that afternoon, when it was getting late, we were heading home. We stopped at an intersection and… these guys with g-guns ran up to the car. One of them started demanding that Mom get out of the car and the other one had me… The g-guy panicked and he…" Bella gritted her teeth. "H-He shot her. Then the bastards took the car and left us in the middle of the street." I can see it in her eyes. She's not really here with me right now. She's back there, seeing it all happen again and my heart aches at the thought. But I know that she has to get through this if she's ever going to let it go.

"I c-called 911. I… I didn't k-know what to d-do. I p-put pressure on the w-wound but… I didn't know what to do," she says desperately, not really talking to me at the moment. I don't mind. I just sit and listen in sad silence as she brokenly relates what happened. "But it-it wasn't e-enough. I- I watched her die, slowly." Bella's eyes are closed and her expression is nothing less than pure pain and agonizing guilt. "Damn it," she groans quietly, placing one hand over her eyes as the other clenches into a fist. "My fault. It was my fault… All my fault…" she repeats, and I just can't take it anymore.

I slide across the bench and wrap her in my arms. She stiffened for a moment and I remembered. She always did that whenever anyone hugged her and I had never understood why until Alice talked to us all. I closed my eyes and waited for her to relax. I hated that she couldn't even take comfort in someone's embrace before reassuring herself that they didn't pose a threat to her. I hated that she had to take care of her father from age ten. I hated that she had been left alone in the world, with no one to care for her. And I hated – I absolutely _hated _that she felt like it was her fault.

Oh, yes, we had all misjudged her in the very worst way and I could only be thankful that she was giving us a chance to rectify our mistakes at all – even though I was certain that she only did so for the sake of Alice's relationship with us. I was grateful for that, as well. Even though I'm sure she thought we must genuinely hate and despise her, she allowed and even encouraged contact between Alice and us because she wanted Alice to have the love and support of her family.

"Bella… Bella, it wasn't your fault. You were just a little girl and you did everything that you could. _It wasn't your fault, Bella_," I soothed her, and it was as though my words were the last straw that broke the camel's back. I heard a soft whimper and I could feel her tears as she cried in my arms, the same way that Alice and Rose had so many times before. I rocked her slowly from side to side, shushing her gently as she cried and hopefully released at least some small part of the guilt she carried.

Eventually, her tears seemed to cease and she sniffled quietly. "What is it with you Cullen women and getting me to open up and cry?" she groaned weakly and I couldn't hold back a soft chuckle. "Bella…" I called her name quietly and she responded with a small 'hmm?'. I paused, hoping that she would know how sincere I was being when I spoke. "Bella, I want you to know that you don't have to be alone anymore. You are welcome in this house and you can come to me if you need to. I could never take your mother's place and no one ever should, but I want to be there for you if you'll let me?" I asked quietly and I felt her tense up slightly at my words before she slowly relaxed into my embrace. "Thank you, Esme," she said softly, almost hesitantly, and it hit home once more. This girl never had anyone to take care of her. She always had to do everything for herself. Well, not anymore, I vowed silently. I would be there for this girl because, no matter what she may think, she deserved it.

**A/N: cool chap! huh?**


	79. Chapter 79

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry I took sooooo long to update. My mind has been preoccupied with romance and gushy stuff I feel weird even admitting. I'm in loooove and whipped. Yet... I love it. Is that weird? I'm** **not sure, no idea how to "come out" to my family. Came out to two of my friends, one took it well. The other thinks it's a choice. Coincidence or just a life fuck?**

**I'm pissed, I wrote the whole chap and right before I saved... it froze. I had to re write it. The first draft was fucking amazing... this one, I'm not too crazy about.**

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**

**Ch.79**

**Bpov**

Second chances... they exist. Ok, Awesome. Now. I need a second chance. I screwed up and I need another chance to not mess this up. Fuck, it's me. Everyone knows I will fuck this up somehow. I jump out of my car, slamming the door behind it. Billy passed me as I drove up the corner. He must be around the store by now, ten maybe five minutes away. I know Jake is in the garage, it's Sunday. He spends all Sunday morning in the garage when Billy and Harry go fishing.

I kick the garage door open to see Jake working on the Rabbit. "What the fuck?" he asks as I barge in and shove him in to the wall with scrap metal on it. It clangs and shakes but Jacob stays erect. "You Jacob Black are a dick. One self-centered, egotistical, narcissistic, douchebag." I say to him as I glare at him.

"You're calling me self-centered, egotistical and a narcissist? That's you Bella, not me." he says. I glare at him and watch as he pushes off the metal shelf, some pieces falling in the ground with a clang. "You told me I needed to talk to you before I talked to the pack, I'm here. Let's talk." I say and Jake drops the wrench in his hand to a shelf. "Bella, you blacked out on us. What did you want us to do?" he asks.

"I wanted you guys to try and help me, Jake. I was lost, it's me. I get lost and when I do it's hard to snap out of it." I say slowly. Jake runs a hand threw his shaggy black hair "You pushed us away, Bella. Pushed me away. What could I have done? You were so adamant to stay in that... fucking black hole." he says looking up at me and I role my eyes as I look at his work bench.

"This isn't about the pack, is it." I state rather then ask. "What else would it be about?" he asks. I lick my lips trying to fight of a bitter laugh "You're still in love with me, aren't you Jacob." I state looking at him, his mouth is half open. His hand up to his chest pointing at me, his face blank. Then like a switch, it changes. His face crumbles and his hand goes to his side. He looks at the ground and kicks it with the toe of his shoe.

"You were supposed to love me." he says. I shake my head and he keeps talking. "I've always been there for you, Bella. When you were too damaged to function, too dark to even talk I was there. I was you're friend. Then when everything that has happened to you, I have been there. I have been patient. I have been patiently waiting for you to see the error of your ways and finally come to me, but you wont. You just... want to be like this. And then Alice breaks your heart and instead of trying to get over it, you stayed so adamant to just isolate yourself and stay in this dark little hole." he says loudly.

"I don't love you, Jacob. I love Alice." I say. "Love can only exist with a man and a woman, Bella." he says. I let a laugh escape me, "You must be joking." I say. "No, I'm not. I let you have your fun, let you go through you're stage of dating girls. I know Connor hurt you Bella and I get that you are hesitant to sleep with men but, you slept with Embry, Tyler and Mike for God's sake. You're over what he did and I think that what happened with Alice is a perfect example of it." he says.

I shake my head "You have to be kidding Jacob. You let me? I'm not you're property. I'm nothing other than a friend of yours and even that word is on lose threads with us as of now, so tread carefully for your next words. And I love Alice, Jacob." I say again. "God created man and a woman. It's a sin to love out of that equation. You aren't born gay." he says.

"Then you're not born straight." I say with a shrug. His eyes go wide "Yeah, you are." he says. I shake my head "You are not born in sexuality. The human has a great way of evolving. Breaking through the boundaries set. You are born and you start to learn, they tell you who to like, what to like, what not to like, what not to do and when. Some of the things you learn to like are because your parents like it and told you to like it. IT rubs off on you, I was born but my mother always gave me a certain freedom. She never told me what to like or who, she just let me figure it out. I liked a girl way before Connor, way before Veronica." I say running a hand threw my hair.

"I think I was around six and I wanted a girlfriend, not a boy. I wanted to hold her hand and walk around the sand box with her." I run a hand threw my hair with a hint of a smile. "Maria Espinosa, and she was the first person to ever tell me that liking a girl was weird and that I should like boys. And even after that, I still liked girls." I say. "The thing is, I wasn't influenced in to believing one way of thought, I was allowed to find my own way." I say to him.

"It doesn't mean it's not wrong." he says. "Jake, I will never love you that way. If your god was so adamant against it, why didn't he just stop it from happening? Face it Jake, God doesn't exist." I say turning my body to look at him, my arms at my sides in a shrug. "He doesn't, exist." I say and look to the Rabbit.

"Human's crave what they crave and only so happens that I am more accepting then you are. Because if I were as sexist as You are, I would be reading you the bible. Who, we also don't know exactly who wrote it. It comes from scripts. Many, many scripts that are pieced together and roughly translated to what you think is a holy book. It talks more about judgment, how to use wealth and how to take care of the pour. I have all of those down pat so if God really does exist, he will have to waver between my sings and trust me, I don't think Alice can even be a sin." I say to him.

He shakes his head "You are so ignorant." he says and I laugh this time eyeing a piece of metal on his work bench. "I'm not ignorant." I say. "Please, you are worse than a little kid." he says and my head snaps up to him. "Repeat that to me." I say "Your as ignorant as a child." he says.

"Fine... Jake. You are just... not worth it." I say shaking my head as I turn around to start walking. "Fuck you." he says. I stop still and look over my shoulder "What?" I ask. He glares "I love you with mind, body and soul. And give you and out of sin and you still chose her? Still chose Alice over me?" he asks. I look in his eyes "I will always, chose Alice over anyone. The only reason I wanted to fix the friendship was because I wanted you to meet Ness. But... you're not worth it Jake. I don't know how you could have pretended to be my friend for so long. It's really disgusting." I say shaking my head as I turn my back to him.

I light a cig as I start to make my way out of the garage and stop to grab the large piece of metal and turn it on my fingers. I throw it to the rabbit, shattering its rear glass. I hear Jake yell and I grab my wallet and throw $150 on the ground. I walk out, ignoring his yells at me, I slide on the bike. I see the helmet and hang it from my arm as I turn it on and gun out. I start to drive at a nice speed and driving with both hands while smoking. "Going to hell...pfft, fucking idiot." I say around my cig and grab a curb.

Once I reach home I slam the door shut and throw the helmet on the floor and my jacket off. I walk to the kitchen and grab a Corona and pop the cap as I grab a bag of chips and walk over to the living room and flip on the TV. I'm still fuming but I don't know how to cope. I don't want to get sweaty, I don't want to do anything. I just want to take my mind off of it.

I pop a chip in my mouth crunching it as I lean back and snuggle in to my sofa. I hear footfalls on the stairs and frown, "Alice?" I ask. "Yeah, Bell?" she asks walking in to the room in plain Jeans and one of my T shirts. I smile a bit "Hey, baby." I say standing up and walking over to her giving her a hug and a kiss. "I thought you were at you're parents' house for the week?" I ask.

She shrugs "I got bored, Eddie and Jazz are out, Rose and Em had a date so I was left alone. I came here." She says happily. I nod with a small smile on my lips "Alright..." I say nodding with a slight hint of a smile. "So, what are you doing baby?" she asks. I groan "I went to see Jake, fun that was." I growl as I plop back down on the "Guessing you had a fight?" she asks. I look at her "What? me and Jake? Noooo, we didn't fight. he just told me he's in love with me and that, well that I may or may not go to hell for loving you. But a fight? Oh, no woman. You are so far off." I say sarcastically.

Admittedly, I may be taking it out on Alice, but shit. I'm mad. But, I don't want to blame it on Alice. "He's in love with you?" she asks ignoring me being rude, the angel. "That is real old news baby, don't worry about it. I only have eyes for you." I say snuggling my head in her neck. She chuckles as she runs her hands threw my short hair.

"Hey, I have a great idea. Let's go to the meadow, we haven't been here in so long. And the day isn't all that bad either." Alice says and I grin "You're on. Let's go, I actually miss the place. You get the quilt and I'll get the food, we can make a day out of it." I say to her and with a peck on the lips we part ways.

I start quickly making sandwiches and placing bottles of water in a back pack. I grab a bag of gummy candy I know Alice loves and some fruit and stuff that in the bag as well. I smile when I'm finished and walk to see Alice coming back in from outside. "The quilts in the trunk of the car." She says. I nod and after we close the house we get in the car.

I settle back in my driver seat and head off driving slowly enjoying the surprisingly warm weather, we slowly drive up the trail. Stopping at the small shop to see Caius and Susannah. "Bella! How wonderful to see you again!" Susannah says excitedly. Alice steps to the side from behind me and Susannah legs me go and wraps her in a hug.

"Alice, how wonderful to see you again as well." She says hugging her before she stops and smiles. "How have you two been?" she asks. I grin and shrug "Were good, Suze. Where's Caius?" I ask. She sighs "Somewhere around the back, he's been ill lately." She says sadly. I frown "Susannah, you know that anything you two need. You can just call me." she says.

Susannah sighs "Not like the old fart would even go to the hospital. He demanded that he had things to do before he went." She says. I frown and look at Alice, "Alice, stay here with Susannah. I'm going to go see if I can find Caius." I say and she nods.

I walk through the store until I reach the back of it and in the green house, packing heavy bags of seeds is Caius. "Caius, you know better than to be lifting." I say and walk over and grab the heavy bag from his hands and place it on top of the others.

"Bella, how are you dear." He says and hugs me. I smile "I'm good, and you? Susannah says you have been feeling ill? You know better than to let yourself go, old man. I'm here to pay for any medical costs." I say and he shakes his head.

"I have things to do before I go." He says. "You keep saying that old man, now let me help you with these bags." I say and grab two of them and start stacking them on the others. "I could use a pair of strong young arms around this place." He sighs. I smile up at him, "That's what I'm here for." I say and he nods and takes a seat in his small chair.

"Bella… I'm afraid my time here is close to ending." He says and I take in a deep breath to calm my emotions. My eyes instantly stinging but I ignore it as I grab more bags and keep stacking. "Don't say that Caius. You are as healthy as a horse." I say.

"Ah, Bella… even the best horse goes down." He says. I shake my head and look at him "Tomorrow, you and me are going to the hospital Caius. I'll give you a hand around, just don't give up yet." I say and he smiles at me.

"Oh, how I would have loved a child like you Bella." He says. I chuckle "You have Dani, Aron and Tracey." I say. He smiles "But there all stupid." He says and I crack up laughing. We walk back to the store and Alice and Susannah are speaking about her children. "-dly they only visit every five months or so. I can't blame them, it takes a lot of money to travel and they have their children to look after now." She sighs.

I smile "Well, why don't you tell them that I will pay for their flight and where they will sleep so they can visit you more often?" I ask her. Susannah looks at me shaking her head "Oh, Bella. Money doesn't grow on trees." She says. I shrug "I have enough to give around Susannah. Trust me, you have done enough for me. I can only repay you." I say and kiss her hand tenderly before giving her a hug.

I sigh, "I'll be around this week, we can catch up then. But me and Alice have plans." I say. Caius smiles "The springs will be verry good today. Go have fun kids." He says and after a few more minute soft chit chat we head on over.

We walk for a bit before I start to feel a tingling up my legs, I shake it off and keep walking behind Alice. She has gotten good at bushwalking, I chuckle a bit and then, it happens again. My head swims, the thudding in my ears grows and my knees give in and I land on my knees and palms as I shake off the dizziness.

"Bella, you ok?" Alice asks kneeling next to me. I try not to freak out but my sight has gone black. I move them around and slowly color starts entering until around four minutes pass and I can see again. I sigh and sit on the ground shaking my head "Yeah, baby. I'm fine. Just… got light headed. I didn't sleep to much last night." I say and she nods and after a few more minutes we start walking again.

Alice keeping a close eye on me. Once we enter the meadow I snuggle in her neck as we lay down on the blanket. "I love you." I mumble in her neck. She chuckles, "I love you more." She says. I laugh "Impossible, you can't compare a tree to the forest." I say. She rolls her eyes "You can't compare a drop of water to the ocean." She says. "You can't compare one atom with every atom on every living thing in the planet." I say and Alice groans.

"Must you be so smart as to stump me every time I try to win?" She asks with a cocked eyebrow. I grin at her "Well.. I don't have to be, I can be like Jessica. Like, I love your hair and like Mike is oh, so hot. But, ugh, like Bella is the best in bed." I start mimicking Jessica's tone and she groans and pushes me off her and straddles my lap kissing my lips.

"For the love of god, never speak in that voice again." she says looking in my eyes. Her hands running threw my hair. I nod and she kisses me again, leaning in to the kiss and I feel so at peace. We kiss for a long time, just kissing.

Then I hear a small growl and quickly I roll over and put Alice behind me. I look around the edge of the woods and grab my bag and in it my gun and take it off safety. "Bella, what is it? is that a gun?" Alice asks. "Shhh." I say looking through the edges of the meadow. I hear the growl again, closer.

"Alice, I need you to be very quiet." I whisper to her. I feel her nod "Don't make a sound and don't move until I tell you to." I say. Again I feel her nod on my shoulder. The growling gets louder and I see the ferns at the edge straight across from us shift. I steady my breathing and make sure the gun is loaded quickly.

I feel my heart beat at my ears thudding. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. I take a slow breath in, threw my nose and I see a paw come out of the ferns. Wolf, shit. They hunt in packs. I strain my ears to see if I hear more growling or if there is some movement anywhere around us. No, just that place.

Then the creature jumps out of the ferns and I aim the shot when Alice yells "It's a dog!" and I stop. Alice quickly scrambles up and goes to walk forward but I'm faster and I hold her arm "Alice, it may be a wolf. And if it is a dog, it could be wild, and hungry." I say still aiming at the dog.

"Bella, come on. It may even be friendly." She says. I shake my head and Alice whistles "Here boy, come on boy. Come here." She says and the dog looks up at her and slowly his tail starts wagging and he starts walking over to us slowly.

The dog more or less growls at me and I glare at it before I know it the dog jumps and pushes me to the ground under its weight. "Ufff." I groan when the dog is right on me. I stretch my hand for the gun but before I can I feel its breath on my face and I wait for it to bite when… it licks me.

It keeps licking and I groan until I push it off me. "Eww." I say as I wipe at my cheek. I hear Alice giggle as she throws a sandwich at the dog and he eats it quickly. "That is disgusting." I groan as I wipe at my face and stand and grab the gun putting on the safety again.

I put the gun on the bag again and Alice is petting the dog. "I think its lost, but he doesn't have a collar." She says. I shrug "Maybe they ditched him." I say and Alice glares. "That's not a nice thing to say, Bella. Besides… who would ever ditch this little guy?" she asks in a baby voice.

"That little guy is one heavy dog, I think he's a husky." I say and I look over to see Alice's puppy dog eyes. Shit, "Oh, no. Don't you start with this Alice." I warn. "Come on! He's just a baby, maybe a year old. Come on Bella, you said you wanted a dog." She says in a whinny voice.

"Alice, a dog is a big responsibility and besides I don't have a bed for it to sleep in." I try to reason her out of it. "So? We can just go buy him one." Alice says petting the dog's fluffy black and grey fur.

"Is there any way I can talk you out of this?" I ask. Alice lifts an eyebrow and I sigh and sit on the blanket next to Alice. The dog quickly plants his self on my lap and I gently push him off. "I though you liked animals." Alice states. I smile to myself as I watch the dog role to look at me. "I do." I say and stretch my hand and scratch under his jaw.

"What you want to call him?" I ask looking at her. "Hmm… Kovu." She says. I laugh and shake my head chuckling "Of course." I sigh and grab the bag and give him one of the sandwiches. He hops up and scarfs it down. "Pour guy was hungry." I say and grab the bole of fruit and empty it on a plate before grabbing a water bottle and pouring water in the bowl and letting him drink it down.

I smile to myself "He's a friendly fellow." I say and Alice nods "Do you like Kovu as a name? Do you boy?" she asks in that baby tone and the dog wags its tail. "Hey, Kovu. Fetch." I say and throw a twig, he chases after it and grabs it in his mouth and brings it back. "Obviously he's been trained. Who would leave a dog out in the woods with no collar?" I ask to Alice.

She shrugs "No idea." She sighs. I smile and the dog pushes me to lie down on the blanket. My head lands on Alice's lap and he curls on me. His chest on my stomach as he curls up ready for sleep. I sigh "Well, at least he's a comfortable boy." I say and Alice leans down to kiss my lips.

"I think we were interrupted before." She says against my lips. I smile and lift up a bit and kiss her deeply. The dog moves off me to go curl up on the grass and I notice that his fur is mated with mud and twigs and sap.

"Hey… it's going to rain soon. We've been her for an hour or so, why not head on home and give this boy a bath and some warm food." I say to Alice. She grins and nods "I'd like that." She says and I grin as we start picking everything up. The dog looks at us, his ears flat, eyes wide and tail still.

I smile at him "Come on Kovu. We're going home." I say and he wags his tail and fallows behind me and Alice. We continue to walk until we reach my car and as soon as we do, as if he had known he hops in when Alice opens the door. I laugh and after I pack everything I let the hood down and drive home.

The dog seemed to enjoy the ride. Once he's home and I open the door he starts sniffing and running from one side to the other until he bolts up stairs. I fallow after him only to find him sniffing at my office. I chuckle "Come on boy, we have to give you a bath." I say and he looks up, like he knew what it meant.

And slowly fallows me back to the first floor bathroom where Alice set up a bath and towels and what not. We spend half an hour giving him a nice bath and then when Alice is done blow drying his hair he is allowed to jump on the couch and curls onto my right while Alice curls on my left and we watch some TV as the storm brew's away.

**A/N: here it is, hope you guys like it. I will update as soon as I can.**


	80. Chapter 80

**A/N: Glad to see you guys are still reading my story even though I vanished for a couple weeks or something I can't really remember. So, Review guys.**

**I do not own Twilight.**

**Ch.80**

**Bpov**

I wake up to barking. I groan as I stretch and realize I slept on the couch. Nice. I look around and see Alice eating a bowl of cereal at the foot of the couch, I sit up and rub the sleep form my eyes. "Is it too late to throw him back in the woods?" I joke dryly and Alice just nods "It's too late." She says humoring me. I chuckle and whistle "Kovu, come here boy." I call out.

I hear a bark and the pitter patter of nails on the hard wood floor. The beast of the dog runs from the kitchen, jumps on the couch and on me, I chuckle quietly. "Hey, boy. You hungry?" I ask playing with his fur. Alice speaks up "I gave him some meat; we need to buy dog food." She says. I nod at her and stand up "Why don't I grab a quick bite and a shower and we can head to the pet shop?" I ask.

Alice grins and nods and after a pat to the dog's head I head to my room to brush my teeth. I decide to just jump in a quick shower and once that is done I get ready for a long day. I get dressed in a blue V neck, blue jeans, combo boots and a scarf around my neck. I place my black coat over my shirt and I use gel to stile my hair in to its sex look.

After I'm done I walk down stairs to smell waffles, I walk in to the kitchen to see Alice setting a plate of waffles down for me. "There you are, eat up." She says with a bright smile. I grin and walk around the counter to kiss her. "I love you." I mumble against her neck as I kiss it.

Alice tilts her head up giving me more access and I place a trial of quick kisses on her neck. I place one last kiss on her lips before I set down and start eating my chocolate chip waffles. I hear a whine and look down to see Kovu whining at me. I frown.

"No, my food." I say. He whines again and sits on his hind legs, his tail stretched behind him. "Holly, Alice look at this, he can sit!" I say and Alice leans over the counter top. She chuckles and straightens herself out "That is so cute!" she says and I chuckle as I break off a peace and throw it at him, he catches it in his mouth. "This dog is a bad ass." I say around a mouth full of waffle.

"Don't speak with your mouth open and yes, he is." she says grinning and I open my mouth to show Alice my mouth full of food. "See food." I say and Alice scrunches up her nose. "Eww, Bell." She says and I role my eyes as I take another bite. "Kovu, come on boy. Go potty." She says and leads him out the door in the kitchen.

He barks and runs outside; I laugh along with Alice and finish up eating quickly. "Thank you so much honey, they tasted... amazing." I say. I kiss Alice's cheek and pull her close to me, "I love you." I mumble against her ear and she chuckles before lifting her head up to capture my lips in a kiss.

We stay like that for a while, just kissing. Enjoying each other's company, what a perfect life. We break apart after a few minutes and we call for Kovu as we head to the car. He jumps in the back seat, as if he has done this a million times instead of once.

We drive out to the town, Kovu sticking his head out the side enjoying the wind in his fur. I lower the top of the car enjoying another surprising warm sunny day. Hmmm, maybe global warming isn't a myth after all?... I shake out of my silly thoughts in time to hear her tell me to make the turn. I do as I'm told and we drive around the town for a bit before we reach the pet shop.

Once we get there Kovu jumps out the back and starts sniffing every single things around. I whistle for him and he walks back to me before we enter, the pet shop. As soon as we enter Kovu bolts around the corner directly to the cats. I jog after him to see him growling lowly at the cat.

"Bad boy, come here. Leave the ugly cats alone." I say and after he barks and growls at the cats he walks back over to me. I look behind me to see Alice has vanished, I sigh. "How much you wanna bet she's looking at collars?" I ask the dog as I walk through the rows and find my Alice, bingo! Looking at collars.

"Alice he is a boy. Put down the pink stuff." I say as I walk over to my shopaholic girlfriend and take the pink beaded leash out of her hand and put it back on the shelf. I grab a simple black one and a blue one. I grab a black collar and a doggy tag thing and put it all in the basket.

Alice had already put shampoo and doggy treats in the basket. We walk over to the toy isle and I grab a Frisbee "What about this?" I ask. "Oh, I like this one." She grabs a tug war thing. I role my eyes and we both throw it in the basket. "Alice catch!" I yell as I throw a tennis ball at her. She catches it and throws it in the basket.

After we pretty much have around ten to fifteen toys for the dog we head over to the food section. "Um… wow." I mumble and Alice nods as she pulls me in to the shelves of food. Dry food, wet food, canned food, good food, bad food, big dog food, little dog food, puppy food, fur food, teeth food. Crap! Who knew a dog needed so much differed foods?

"Alice, we are not buying every single food in this place. Pick between Alpo canned food or dry food." I say and she pouts. I role my eyes, "Fine we can buy both." I say and tell the dude to grab the big gurney thing and place the huge bag of food there, and put it around the counter until were done.

We buy some brushes, nail clippers, doggy dentastick, a few bandanas, a huge doggy bed, dog whistles, and other dog related items. After we have everything we need we go to the cash register and pay for everything. Alice and I load everything up even getting the doggy badges engraved with my address and the Cullen's.

After we put the collar on him we tie the leash and load everything in the trunk of my car. After we get home and everything is put away Alice insist we should show him to her family. I agree but remember I agreed to take Caius to the hospital. I drop her off at her parents' house and drive straight over to Caius's place.

I greet Susannah and after a quick chat me, Susannah and Caius are on our way to the hospital. "So old man, how you been feeling?" I ask. He chuckles "A bit shaky in the legs but other than that, all good." He says and I nod chuckling. "Well, were going to get you checked out. A few things and then you can head on home and appease Susannah here's worries." I joke.

"I worry because he is an old fart and I don't want him to go and get hurt." She says. I laugh softly "Oh, Caius? She worries. She's a keeper." I joke and he grins at me "Fifty years we have been together." He says with a grin stretching his wrinkly pale face.

"Fifty two years." Susannah correct with a matching grin. I smile at those two "So, any tips for me?" I ask as I take a slow curb. "Don't cheat." Caius says. I raise an eyebrow "Are we speaking from personal experience here?" I ask. Caius shakes his head "No, but it's a pretty obvious mistake to make. Now isn't it young girl?" he asks.

I nod "It is sir." I say and he chuckles patting my shoulder "Don't call me sir, silly girl." He says and I sigh in relief. "Never nag about stupid things. Caius always leaves his shoes next to the recliner, you think I nag about that? No, I just either pick them up and put them in the closet or I leave them in the corner. Why fight over stupid things?" she asks.

Caius nods and smiles "Always bring her flowers, you can never have to many flowers." He says. I look at Susannah in the rear view and she nods "You can, but you will never mind it." she says and I chuckle as I nod.

"At least once a week, cook their favorite meal." He says. And that's how the hole ride to the hospital goes, them giving me relationship advice. "Last but not least never leave the room, argument or not without saying I love you." Susannah and Caius say together and I chuckle at them as I help them out of the car.

"You kids and you're fast cars. There so damn small, why not buy a big good car like the good old days?" Caius grumbles. I chuckle "Sorry old man, I like going fast." I say and he shakes his head in disapproval. Once we get to the nurses' station were passed in to Caius doctor's room.

After introductions and the basic checkup the doctor took some blood and headed out to get it tested. Caius and Susannah went with the doc to get a cat scan and I stepped out to the hallway and waited for them to finish up.

We stay at the hospital for around an hour just doing random crap until I send them home. I drive to the Cullen's house and knock on the door. It opens and its quickly fallowed with the sounds of barks and laughs. I see everyone talking and Jazz and Alice playing with the dog. Esme smiles "Bella, I was wondering when you would show up." She says happily. I give her a small grin and a shrug "I had to take care of a few errands." I say and when Esme hugs me, I still stiffen up but I relax faster.

She rubs between my shoulder blades the only way I could explain as motherly and I relax a bit. She pulls away and Emmett booms his laugh at me, "You named a dog after a lion?" he asks. I chuckle and shrug out of my jacket "Yeah, well." I offer as a lame explanation and hang my leather jacket on the hook. "Are you hungry Bella? We all ate but there is more than enough left." She says. I feel my stomach grumble and I not twice "Sure, thank you Esme." I say and she smiles "I'll fix you a plate now." She says and walks to the kitchen. I walk over to Alice and she holds her hand up, I pull her up with one hand and connect our lips in the same movement.

I grin a bit against her lips "Missed you." I mumble as I put my hand on her cheek holding her there for a second longer. She lifts on her tip toes and kisses me a few more times before we pull away "Missed you more." She says and I role my eyes.

I take a seat next to Rose and nudge her with my shoulder, "Hey, Bella." She says. "Hey, Rose." I say and she looks to the side at me. I wag my eye brows at her and she chuckles and pushes me to the side. "Yeah, we are having a threesome." She says and I sigh and sink in my seat. "Cool." I say and Alice's head shoots up. "Ew, Bella. No." She says. I laugh "No, no. Not like that Alice. She means a triple date." I say and Alice relaxes. "Oh, cool." She says.

I nod and yawn as I rub my eyes, "So, how was Caius and Susannah?" Alice asks. I look up "Were waiting for the test results, after that we will know what to do and blah blah." I say with a wave of my hand. Alice launches a pillow at me and I catch it right before it hits my face.

"Bella, here you go." Esme says and hands me this huge plate of food. "Er, Esme. I'm eating, not Emmett." I say and Esme, Rose, Alice, Edward and Jazz laugh while Emmett pouts. "You look thin darling." She says. I nod and stand "If you don't mind, I would eat this in the kitchen. Don't want to risk staining the white carpet." I say and Esme nods and fallows after me.

I sit down and Esme sits next to me with a cup of what I assume is coffee in her hand. "So, Bella. How is everything?" she asks. I smile and take a bite, "Hmmmm, this is so good." I say covering my mouth with my hand so I can talk. Esme smiles "You're welcome." She says. I take another bite and swallow "Everything is going great." I say.

She nods "Bella, I know you and Alice have a strong relationship." She says and I nod "And I know that you love her.. but, I think Alice should move back home." She says. I feel my stomach drop but I forcefully swallow the food in my mouth. I down it with a sip of water. "Oh, um… I'm sure you know that I can support her Esme. She won't ever need for anything with me." I say seriously and Esme smiles kindly.

"I know that, Bella. But she is only eighteen and still in high school, I think it's important for her to be with us at least until her senior year of high school is over. Then, if you two want to get a dorm together at college… I'm fine with it." she says softly. I nod twice, "Have you spoken to Alice about this?" I ask. She nods "Alice was resistant at first but she says she can spend the weekends at your house and you are more than welcome to stay over in the holidays." She says.

I wipe my mouth on the napkin, my appetite completely gone. "Ugh, well. You're her mom, you chose. I'll just… get out of your hair." I say and stand slowly feeling myself hollow out. "Oh, Bella. It's not like you won't see her again." Esme says. I look at her and nod "Yeah, you're right, I'm being silly." I say and plaster a fake smile on my face. "Bella." Alice's voice says from the door and I look at her with still my fake grin splitting my face. "Hey." I say and take another bite of my food. "Mom you didn't, did you?" Alice asks.

Esme sighs "I did actually." She says standing up with a sigh. Alice sighs "Bella, I wanted to tell you. Apparently mom thinks its best-" I cut her off "Alice, it's cool." I say and force feed my self another bite. Slowly I start to relax and see clearly. Truly it is the right thing for her.

"Really?" she asks a bit of shock in her voice. I laugh a bit to myself "Sure, Alice. I'm not you're mother, she is." I say pointing at Esme. "She knows what's best." I say and Alice frowns a bit and I chuckle as I stand and walk over to her and kiss her lips chastely and then her cheek before I hug her to me. "Stop being so silly." I say and drop my voice to a whisper "I can always just sneak in your window." I whisper before pulling away.

"Besides, you can stay over on the weekends." I say and walk back with her next to me and I sit and put her on my lap as I continue to eat. "It's cool." I say and take a bite. "Hot, hot, that's hot." I say gasping around the food in my mouth trying to cool it down, going as far as to shake my head from side to side.

I hear Alice and Esme's chuckles at my antics. And after a few bites I finish my meal. "where is Kovu?" I ask. She chuckles "He is asleep in my bed." Alice says and I grin and after a few thank you's to Esme we head up the stairs to Alice's room. The door closes and quickly I pull Alice to me and against the door. I attack at her lips quiet enough not to wake up the sleeping dog on the bed.

I push against her body so that she hooks her leg on my hip, fuck, yes. I tangle one hand in her hair the other at her hip holding her leg up. "Fuck, Alice." I whisper against her lips, "Bella, this can wait for home." She mumbles but I shake my head as I start un doing her pants. She places her hands at the back of my neck tugging at my hair. I stiff a moan but, the dog herd.

He starts barking before he is even fully awake and I break apart and the dog stops barking at me, I role my eyes before I go to kiss Alice he barks again. I pull away and glare at the dog, "Shut up Kovu." I say lowly. He growls his tail wagging playfully and I sigh before I walk over to him and pat his head and pull him in to a soft hug.

"I always wanted a dog." I mumble running my fingers threw his fur as I lean back on the bed and he moves to my lap. "Why didn't you ever get one?" Alice asks. I frown "I couldn't take care of myself, how could I have taken care of an animal?" I ask. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes "Besides, back then. I couldn't go a day without sniffing. I don't think it would have been wise to keep that crap close to a dog." Is ay and she nods.

"When do you have to move back in?" I ask, "A few days before school starts." She says. I nod "Two weeks." I sigh, she nods "Two weeks." She echoes. "Kovu, come on. Let's spend some time with your family Ali." I say softly. She kisses my cheek and we walk down fallowing the running Husky down the stairs and he actually jumps on Emmett.

Ha! I knew I like that dog.

**A/N: I'm soooooooooo sorry for the long wait for this chap! Today is also my one month anniversary with my girl Kat, love you baby. Hope you all liked this chap!**


	81. Chapter 81

**A/N: here it is! Another chapter by me! finally right? Lol**

**I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT… starting to hate writing that, like don't you all know that by now? LEARN PEOPLE! Lmao**

**Ch… what chapter is it? oh right 81**

**Ch.81! fuck, this story is old. Why the hell are you people still reading this crap? Lol jk jk jk, keep reading. **

**Bpov**

I close the door to Alice's room. "I shouldn't be here," I remind her. Alice shushes me and kisses me against the door. I lick at her lips. "I should be going home," I mumble against her lip. "Shh," Alice says again as she starts to run her hands over my clothed body. I smile against her lips, amused. "Alice, we start school tomorrow. Don't you want your rest?" I ask and Alice pulls away from my lips to stare at me seriously.

"Bella, baby, this is the only free time we have had without interruptions in a week. We haven't had sex in a week and you want to distract me with stupid things?" Alice asks. I grin, she can't know that I'm just buying time. I need to keep her distracted while Emmett and Rose help me out with this.

"Alice, why did you leave so many clothes at my house if you are just going to stay over on the weekends?" I ask, thinking please don't notice the subject change. She glares at me but shrugs. "This way I can just ride straight to your house on Friday after school. No packing, no nothing," she says as she kisses me for the millionth time. I kiss her back feeling like I can't get enough. It's been a long fucking week. "How the hell am I going to spend nights on end without feeling your lips on my body, Alice?" I ask in a strained voice. Maybe having sex is the perfect distraction for her?

Alice pushes me down on her bed. "You are just going to have to make due with cheap lunch time hook ups in your car, baby," Alice says kissing down my neck. I chuckle and roll us over but Alice pushes back until we are at the same position we started in. "I'm on top this time baby," she tells me and I shudder a bit.

**It's way overdue to give you some fluff so no like, skip to next bold line!**

Alice bites down on my lip tempting me further as I knot my hands in her short hair tugging on it to pull her closer to me. She grinds on me as she moans in to my mouth and I do the same. We make quick work of taking off our clothes or better said throwing our clothes around like wild people.

As soon as I feel Alice's naked wet pussy against mine I can't hold back my moan any longer. "Fuck, Alice." I moan lowly and she runs her hand down my body teasing. She kisses down my body stopping to suck at my nipples for an excruciating amount of time before going down on me. I feel her kiss my clit and then the warm and wet sensation of her tongue. My abdomen clenches at the feeling, she pulls my thighs apart giving her room and I place one hand on her head, not steering her just holding on to her head making sure she won't just leave and the other clenched in the sheet next to me.

**Apov**

I will never get tired of the taste of Bella, she tastes just... fucking incredible. I lick at her wet folds teasing her further. "Fuck, Alice don't tease me," Bella whimpers and I smirk against her pussy. "Aww come on, Bells," I say and pull away, she glares down at me. I stick my tongue out to her and she smirks. "Put that tongue to good use," she says and just to fuck with her I flick it against her clit making her push her hips up.

I lick at her enjoying the stiff moans coming from her. "Shhhh…" I remind her, though probably shushing her against her clit isn't helping the situation. Her taste is addicting and as soon as I let my tongue enter her I feel how she's clenching. Oh, she's close. I start moving my head In and out. "Fuck, so good Alice… shit, I'm…. Fuck, I'm close." She says her voice low and just… fuck, her voice. "Cum for me baby," I say against her pussy and just then I push two fingers in to Bella and just as they enter and I curled them she came. I connect our lips to quiet down the loud as hell moan from her as she quivers and shakes under me. I kiss her slowly letting her calm down slowly.

I snuggle into her neck and wait until she comes to before I curl my fingers once and pull out from her. "Fucking little tease," Bella breathes against my ear before turning us around in a quick movement I'm under her as she is rubbing me. "Fuck, Bella," I breathe and she slowly pushes in to me.

She uses her own hip to set a pace, pushing her hand with her hip until the pace is wild and intense. She keeps hitting my G-spot until I'm so wound up I think that from my stomach under I'm hallow. I shudder at the feeling of Bella's lips attacking my neck, she is so good at giving me sensory overload it's crazy.

She starts to rub and pump and her lips at my neck are enough to send me right to the edge. "Fuck, Alice. You feel so good baby. So good. Ungh… come on baby, take it for me ok. Be a good girl and take it," Bella groans softly against my ear as she pushes and pulls out of me.

I feel it wind up and just like that, with Bella saying, "Cum for me baby." I cum, hard. I feel my legs shake and the tingly sensation across my whole body as the orgasm fucking runs threw me like wild fire.

**Safe to read mothaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa flower! Ha, you though I would say fucker. Sorry man, I'm watching 21 Jump Street and the mood is catchy. **

Bella snuggles in to my neck and slowly breaths deep and calm as she gets used to the calm intimacy of us. It had been around a week that we hadn't had sex. "I love you, Alice. I love you so much." Bella whispers hugging me to her as she lies down and moves me so that I'm lying next to her under the covers of my bed.

I hmm happily as I run my fingertips over Bella's flat stomach, tracing invisible patterns on her flesh. I kiss right above her left breast and Bella hums quietly at the back of her neck. "I love you, Bella… and I can't wait until College so that we can live together," I say quietly. "Yeah, I know what you mean," comes Bella's thick-voiced reply.

I chuckle at her tone. "Sleepy baby?" I ask. She shakes her head and takes a deep breath before she bolts up from the bed. "Get dressed," She says and dashes to the bathroom. I bolt up and stand from the bed grabbing my clothes and putting on my shirt when there's a knock on my door.

"Just a second," I say and slide on my pants. I fix my hair to see Edward on the other side. "Hey," I say breathlessly. "Hey… where's Bella?" Edward asks and just then there's flush, water running, and Bella opens the door. "Sorry, Babe. Dinner just when right through me," she says and looks at Edward. "Hey, Eddie," she says and Edward nods to her.

She lifts an eyebrow and I shrug. "What did you want Edward?" I ask. He frowns. "I wanted to speak to Bella, to tell you the truth," he says. I frown and look to Bella to see her face blank and she shrugs. "Sure, Eddie. Shoot," Bella says with a grin sitting down on the bed, I join her and Edward runs a hand through his hair.

"I… I was wondering if me and Bella could speak in private," he says and nods to the hallway. Bella frowns and shrugs and grins at me. "I'll meet you downstairs," she says before walking with Edward out the room. I huff and look at myself in the mirror… shit. I need a shower.

I grab my towel and walk to the bathroom to see Bella had used my lipstick to write something in my mirror. "Go downstairs." I frown and shake my head as I hop in a quick shower and get dressed quickly. I walk down the steps shaking out my short hair to dispel the drops of water still clinging to it.

My hair was really long, it reached my jaw now. I comb through it with my hand when I see Emmett run from the living room to the foyer. "Bella and Edward are fighting outside," he says and I frown. "What?" I ask. "Bella and Edward are fist fighting outside," Jazz says as he dashes to the door and I run down the final steps and yank the door open from Jazz hands and bolt outside to see that Edward is leaning at the base of the stairs and Bella is leaning against a bright yellow car.

I frown and look at them before Bella grins. "Happy Senior Year!" Bella says and walks over to me slowly. I frown as I let my eyes stare at the yellow car… it's a Porsche. Not only is it a Porsche it's a porch 911 turbo. Aka, the car of my dreams.

Bella grins at me. "Hope it wasn't too much, baby," Bella says and my jaw drops and I shake my head. "No way," I say and Bella smiles wide "Yeah, way," she says nodding. "Bella…" I trail of feeling my eyes tear up. "I thought it was time you had a car, so I talked to your parents and they agreed on me getting you one. Everything is in your name so no one can take it away," Bella says grinning.

I don't think, I jump in her arms and cry on her shoulder. She hugs me to her shushing me as she swings me around and sets me on my feet looking down at me. "I couldn't get it out of my mind that you just don't have a car and well… here you go, baby." Bella says and takes out the keys from her pocket and places that on my palm before she kisses it.

I look behind me to see my family grinning at us, I look at Emmett who looks like he is ready to jump out of his skin. "So… Emmett, want a ride to school tomorrow?" I ask. His grin lights up his face. "BOO YAH! YEAH I WANT TO!" he yells. I grin and look to Rose. "Rose, why don't you check it out under the hood?" I ask and her face that was grinning goes blank. "I… I'll get it tomorrow. Why don't you and Bell head on out for a drive, the night is fine," she says and I grin and look at Bell. She opens the door for me and… its suicide doors. Bella had the car customized.

I walk over to her and kiss her lips before I drop into my seat. Bella shuts the door for me and walks around the car and hops in. I turn on the engine and feel the car growl under me, I feel the adrenaline run through my veins. I pull the car around and drive down our driveway. As soon as we are out of the driveway Bella tells me to head to the freeway. I follow her instructions and after were at the stretch she tells me to gun it and I do.

I launch us forward so fast it feels like were flying. We burn rubber down the freeway no cars in sight and Bella's carefree holler echoing in my ears. After a few miles I slow down and we turn back and drive down just as fast. After a while, we have to go back and I drop Bella off at her house.

"You want a ride tomorrow?" I ask leaning against the car as Bella lights up my cig. Bella smiles before she lights up her own. "Nah… I need to stop over at Ness's and drop her off at the middle school." Bella says. I nod and we joke around as we finish our cigs. As soon as we do, Bella pins me against my car in a searing kiss that sends me back to our first days dating. The raw… hunger of it. It's a raw intensity and want that drives me crazy. I kiss her back just as fiercely but Bella pulls away with a grin.

"I'll see you tomorrow, ok Alicat?" Bella says and kisses my cheek. I nod mutely and after a few more kisses and promises to see each other tomorrow. I drive off, leaving Bella to enter her house.

**Bpov**

How do two weeks go by so fast? It's just like yesterday me and Alice had moved in together and now… now, I'm stepping into my empty house with Kovu right behind me. I sigh and look around the house, crap. You could just feel how empty it is. I click my tongue as I hang my jacket on the hooks and walk over to the couch.

I should probably get used to it, I'm almost always alone. I smile to myself as I sigh and Kovu jumps on the couch and places his head on my lap. "Oh, come on boy. It's going to be fun to have the house to ourselves. We can walk around in our underwear!" I say excitedly but then frown. "But, you're a dog, so you walk around naked… I should really consider buying you some doggy clothes. That is completely in appropriate," I say and Kovu looks at me, his blue eyes twinkling in the light before he turns his head at me.

I shake my head and sigh as I stand up. "I'm talking to a dog, I'm talking to a freaking dog like he would understand me…" I sigh and turn around slowly to look at him "Do you understand me?" I ask and Kovu ducks his head under his paws. "You do! Tell me something Kovu, beer or soda?" I ask looking at him in the eyes.

He barks once. "Once for beer, twice for soda," I tell him. The fucker barks twice, I glare at him. Great. That's so Alice's dog. "I'm watching you, Kovu," I mumble as I turn and head to the kitchen, I grab a can of coke and open it as I grab a Tupperware bowl filled with strawberries. I walk back to the living room and look at Kovu. Crap. He's giving me the fucking begging puppy dog eyes. Argh! I walk back to the kitchen and grab a hand full of doggy treats and walk back to the living room. I throw the doggy treats on the floor next to me and Kovu jumps to it and start chowing down.

I sit back and start drinking my coke and munching on strawberries until I feel sleepy. I frown and look around the room and see Kovu snoozing on my recliner. I decide to head outside for a smoke deciding that smoking inside would be bad for my dog. I stand as quiet as I can and head out to the porch. Shit my house is creepy at night.

I chuckle at myself as I light up my cig, my phone beeps it's a call from Nessie. I smile and accept the call. "Hey, Ness," I greet her. "Hey, Bella I have great news," she says. I smile around my cig. "Really? shoot." I say leaning on the railing. "I'm starting high school with you tomorrow." she tells me and I frown. "Ness, you're thirteen," I state.

She sighs and I can practically see her rolling her eyes. "I know, but I was home schooled for a couple years and that boost me up a grade and I can now enter high school a year early." She sounded proud. Hell, I was proud. Skipping a grade? That is freaking awesome. "That is freaking awesome, Ness. Want me to pick you up?" I ask. "Yeah, that'd be awesome," Ness says.

I smirk. "We are going to rule that school. I'll pick you up at seven thirty. Bye little sis, tell your mom I say 'hi' ," I say. "Mom says, hey and wants to know if you wanted to eat dinner at our house tomorrow?" Ness asks. I frown but nod with a small smile creeping up my face. "Sure… I'd like that," I accept and after a few more words we hang up and I go to sleep. Tomorrow will be fun.

**A/N: here it is, I kinda like it! what ya all think? Oh, and while i have youre atention. I need a beta for Wolfsbane. Any ideas? anyone interested? PM me**


	82. Chapter 82

**A/N: Hey guys, my summer just started so… hopefully a few more chaps more often. I graduate this month and then it's off to college. I'm exited. Now, read this chapter. **

**I don't own twilight. **

**Ch.82**

**Nesspov**

I woke up early, since I wanted to be sure to have everything ready. I grabbed all my notebooks and stuffed them in my bag. Checked for the hundredth time if I had pen and pencils. I hoped in a warm shower, letting the steam fill the room and let the warm water relax my muscles. I lean my head on the cool tiles as the water cascades down my back, I need a game plan.

"Ok, Ness. Be cool, smooth, relaxed. Don't hook up with anyone; just keep to your own business until you're set. Bella will have your back, ok. You are starting fresh, no relationships, no friends only a sister. A clean slate. Be yourself." I mumble as and at the end of it my trade mark smirk is across my face, today is going to be fun.

I hop out of the shower and quickly wrap a towel on my hair and around my body. I walk to my room hearing mom call out "Breakfast will be on the table soon!" I nod "Thanks, Mom." I say and shut the door behind me. I dry off quickly and look around my room to my closet and open it up to see my clothes picked out.

I purse my lips as I look at it before I remember how cold it is outside. A band T, stripped hoodie, skinny jeans and combo boots are perfect for this weather. I but on my underwear on and slide my clothes on quickly. I shake my hair with my hands as I walk to my dresser.

"Shit, Bella is gonna be here in thirty minutes. I look at my reflection in the mirror and seem to get lost in my eyes like I do most of the time I look in the mirror. I pull myself out of my hypnotic stare and stare at my features, shit… I really do look a lot like Bella.

Hell, if she was older she could pass off as my mom. I shudder, no. Sister Bella is awesome; mom Bella… would be weird. I run a brush quickly threw my hair and as quickly as possible do my hair, after my hair is done I put on, powder to take the shine out of my smooth skin, a bit of eyeliner, lip gloss and make sure my teeth are sparkly white.

After I am pleased with my look I put on deodorant and perfume before grabbing my iPod, book bag and phone and walking out of my room, shutting my door. I can't help but feel… exited. Not nervous. Fuck, I love being a Swan and having the instant cockiness. I sit down just as the doorbell rings. Mom walks over to the door quickly and I hear Bella's voice echo threw the room as she greets my mom.

I had been nervous at the beginning; I thought Bella would hate my mom. But… she didn't. Bella just pushed away from the subject, she just... accepted what happened and moved on to wanting to know me better. Though I am still waiting for Bella and Mom to blow up at one another, I still hope it won't come to that. I start scarfing down my waffles just as Bella comes up from behind me and places a kiss at the top of my head "Hey, kid. Slow down, you're gonna give yourself stomach ache." Bella says before she pulls a seat to her and sits down.

"Hey, Bell." I say and Bella nods she smirks when she sees the sunglasses she gave me on the table and taps at hers that are placed over her eyes. I nod and she grins before mom wakes her on the back of her head, "Sunglasses come off on the dinner table, Bella." Mom reminds her. Bella smiles "Clare, its breakfast time." Bella quips and mom turns around and raises an eyebrow at Bella, Bella sigh sand slides them off before nudging my knee with hers "How do you live with that?" she asks loudly so mom can over hear.

I shrug "I got used to it." I say and mom quips "I heard that Bella." She says. Bella laughs softly "You were supposed to." She says and mom places a plate of waffles in front of Bella and Bella smiles and nods "Thank you." she says and mom sits down and we all eat together. After her first waffle Bella seems to stiffen before she shook it off and continued to eat and bicker with mom.

As soon as we were done, Bella stood and looked at me. "Um… Alice is waiting for me at school to um… check schedules and I would like to show you around so…" Bella trails off and I nod quickly before placing my plate on the sink and kissing moms cheek.

I understood Bella's hidden meaning, 'Lets go so i can make out with Alice before showing you around.' I smirked at Bella behind moms back and she winks.

"Bye mom, see you after school. Love you." I say quickly and manage to get as far as the living room before mom speaks up, "Pictures!" she says and Bella chuckles as she tugs on my hoodie and turns me over so I'm at her side with her arm over my shoulder and the flash blinds me. After five more pictures three with Bella, one with mom and one by myself we are safe in Bella's car.

"I am so sorry; mom is just a bit... weird." I say as I put on my seat belt and Bella starts the engine. She shrugs "It's cool, enjoy it. God knows you deserve it." she says and she pulls out to the road. I nod and Bella nods to the radio, "take your pick." She says and I nod as I put on some pop tune. "Every day I work on the road." Bella hums quietly.

I smile to myself but stay quiet and soon we stop at a light and Bella pulls the roof down. "Hey, Bella." Two girls say at the same time. I look to the side and see two girls on my side of the street in a minivan. Bella looks over and smiles "Hey, Mindy, Stacey." Bella says with little salute. "Who's your friend? Seems a little young for your taste." The one driving says. I have no clue witch one is Mindy and witch one is Stacey.

"Oh, Ness? She's my sister." Bella says and the girls' faces go blank and Bella launches forward because the light went green. I hear Bella's soft laugh, "oh, today is going to be fun if everyone does that face." She says and I nod to myself as we just enjoy the drive.

As soon as the school is near Bella pulls the roof up and clicks her tongue as she slides in. First thing I see is Alice's yellow Porsche, I smile. "Did she cry?" I ask. Bella nods "Yup." I say and I grin. "Emmett owes me ten bucks." I say and Bella looks at me before shoving my shoulder laughing "You two betted on Alice crying? you two are evil." she says and slides right next to Alice's car.

We get out quickly and Bella walks over to Alice and Alice just jumps up to her, wraps her arms around Bella's neck and pulls her down for a kiss. They kiss untill they are leaning against Alice's car and Bella is kind of bobing her head, trying to get closer. Ew.

I look for the big guy and I see him laughing with Rose, Eddie and Jazz. I walk over and greet them "Hey, guys." I say and they greet me back "hey, Ness." They say and rose smiles "Nervous for your first day?" she asks. I shake my head "Nah, more exited then anything." I say and she winks "Good." She says and I look at Emmett.

"You owe me ten bucks." I say and he frowns "Alice didn't cry." He states. I lift an eyebrow and he grins before he pouts "I thought she would suck it up, she already had a car." He says. I laugh and Rose sighs. "Pour old Lucy was a good car." She says. "Lucy?" I ask.

Jazz nods "Alice thought it would be fun to name her car." He say sand Eddie steps in "She loved the name Lucy so, she named it Lucy. It was an old Toyota." He says. I nod "Cool, what she name that one?" I ask pointing to the porche.

"She called it, Carmen because Bella's car is called Shane." Jazz says. I hold back my laugh "Um.. wow." I say and pocket the ten bucks Em gave me when I feel arms around my shoulders and a soft exited voice say "Hi, Ness." I chuckle at Alice's antics. "Hey, sis." I say and Alice grins "I knew, I liked you." she says with a wink.

Bella wraps her arms around Alice's waist and places her head at the top of Alice's head "So, kid. You got your schedule?" she asks. I nod "Yup." I say and take it out form my pocket. I hand it to Bella and she looks it over, nodding. "You're screwed, you got the worst teachers in the hole school." Bella says seriously handing the schedule to Alice. Alice grimaces and hands it to the rest of her family.

I feel my façade break and nervousness starts to set in. "W-what you mean?" I ask and Bella shrugs "You literally have the worst teachers in the hole school." She says and Alice nods "Yeah, you are not going to be challenged at all, with those teachers." Alice says. Jazz pipes up "History class with this teacher is all projects, only read the book and you will Ace it." he says. "Gym is your last class, that's good." He says. Eddie speaks up "Music class will be fun." He says and I glare at them.

Fucking with me is not cool. "Not cool." I huff. Bella cracks a smile before adjusting her book bag on her shoulder. "Meh, it was funny." Bella says and says goodbye to the group before walking me to the school. She puts her arm around my shoulder and chuckles lowly "Just relax; no one will mess with you." She says and I nod.

Bella looks at the paper with my locker number before she sighs "This locker is on the other side of school, away from youre classes. Here have one of mine." she says and just opens a random locker "This is your locker; the code is 6-9-6-9. Ok? Both sixes are left both nines are right." She says and I nod slowly writing my locker number and placing my stuff in there except my notebook, pen and binder.

Bella leans against the lockers, looking at me. "Just relax, you have the coolest teachers, we have gym and lunch together, including study hall. You are going to be fine." Bella says. I nod and pop a peace of gum in my mouth before grabbing my notebooks and walking down the hall with Bella.

"Ok, I'm going to tell you the simple things first. Those over there are the jocks; those are the nerds, the rockers, the Goths, the preppies and the sluts, stay away from the sluts." Bella warns me. I lift an eyebrow and she just shakes youre head, "Just dont do it." she says.

I laugh "YOu slept with all of them didnt you." I ask. SHe shrugs "Alice wasnt here yet." she says. I see her nodding to each group, she would smile and nod or wave to a girl or boy. Something told me Bella knew pretty well how to play between the groups.

"Then, my little sister. Is my group. The cool crowd, they call us. I'll wait for you outside every class ok? I'll walk you to your next class and at lunch just look for the Cullens or me. Here is your stop." Bella says and stops in front of a classroom. She surprises me by opening the door for me and I walk in.

"Pick a seat in the back." Bella comments as I pass and I nod before she closes the door behind me. I look around the room to see around ten kids in sitting down talking to each other. I nod to myself and walk over to the back and take a seat next to the window. As soon as I sit down a blond kid with bright hazel eyes sits next to me.

"Do you mind if I sit here?" he asks. I offer a soft smile "Not at all." I say and he sits and sets his things on the table then turns to me. "I'm Caleb Jason, but everyone calls me CJ." He says sticking his hand toward me. I take it and shake it before letting it go.

CJ had the normal pre-teen look. Baby face, bright smile, spiky hair, surprising smooth skin and he had nice bright hazel brown eyes. All in all a good looking kid that would probably go in to sports. "So, I didn't see you in middle school. Are you new to town?" he asks.

I nod and pop my gum, "Yeah, I just moved to town a month ago." I say and push a few locks of my hair away from my face. "Oh, where are you from then?" he asks. I shrug "Here and there." I say with a small teasing grin. I look in his eyes and he roles them, "I have never heard of that place in my whole life." He jokes.

I chuckle "I'm from Phoenix, Arizona. But I moved around a lot." I explain and he nods "Any reason you moved here? I'm not being nosy; I'm actually curious why anyone would move to the most boring town in the world." He says.

I smirk "My sister lives here… and I wanted to get to know her." I say with a shrug. "So, you live with your sister?" he asks. I laugh lowly shaking my head "No, I live with my mom five minutes away. What is this? Twenty questions?" I tease. He shrugs and scratches the back of his head.

"Sorry, it's just… refreshing to meet someone who isn't from around here and doesn't know you since you were in dippers." He says. I shrug "Never stayed in one place long enough to know what that feels like." I say and he nods "Lucky." He mumbles before turning his attention to the teacher.

I do the same but frown, not lucky. Never had a friend long enough to trust them. I sigh and start to pay attention in class. I had some pretty cute girls in my homeroom, but holy hell were some of the girls in my class are hot.

Bella stayed true to her word and after every single class she was right there to walk me to my next class. I never, felt this happy. I had an older sister, and it was awesome. Until Bella left me alone in the hall because she needed to grab her books. I was minding my own business leaning against the wall when these four girls walking down the hall stop at me.

Three blonds and one with black hair. "Oh, look Tanya. Fresh meat." The frail one said. The prettiest of the group looked over at me and smiled as she walked over. "What's wrong freshmen? You lost?" she asks. I shake my head "No, I'm just waiting for my sister." I say and the one I think is Tanya looks over her shoulder "Well… I don't think she's coming." The frail one says. I'm caught a little off guard when the tuff looking one walks over to me and pulls me to her side.

"Aw, come on Tanya, Irina. She's new, she doesn't know the rules." She says and chuckles as she shoves me so I am in the middle of the four girls. What the holly hell? Why didn't Bella fucking tell me there are bullies in this school?

I swallow down the bit of nervousness I feel and put a mask up with a smirk. "There are rules in this dump of a school?" I ask looking at them. "Oh... we got a cocky one here. Kate, why don't you show her what we do to cocky freshmen?" Tanya asks with a smirk.

I gulp and in a second flat I am on my but on the ground, then a foot pushes my shoulder down and I hit my head on the ground. My head spins and I feel myself get dragged up and slammed against a locker. I kick my feet and, fuck. Oh fuck. HOW THE FUCK AM I NOT TOUCHING THE GROUND?!

I try to punch the girl but she grabs my hand and laughs "Wrong move freshmen." she says and pulls her arm back. I close my eyes waiting for the hit. Shit, Bella. If there is such a thing as sister telepathy, I really fucking need youre help!

Fuck, were the hell is Bella? "KATE." The steely furious voice of my sister echoes through the halls. "You have three seconds to let go of my sister." I hear Bella say and I look to my left to see Bella not five feet away walking quickly down the hall a furious look on her face. Before I know it I'm on my feet and stumble forward but catch myself from falling.

"Ness, you ok?" Bella asks as she passes me and shoves the girl who was holding me up. I nod mutely and Bella pulls me behind her before she shoves the girl named Kate again and she is against the lockers. "I swear to your God, if you ever. EVER. Fucking touch my little sister again I will kill you and no one will find the fucking body. You understand that, Denali?" Bella growls out.

"Hey, cool it Swan. We didn't know she was one of you." Kate says looking down at Bella. Bella smirks "Now, Kate baby. You say that like it's a bad thing." Bella says walking closer to her. "it is." Kate says and Bella grins "That's not what you said the night I fucked you." Bella chimes in and ducks out of the punch swung by Kate. Bella straightens up and grabs her arm and pushes her against the locker "Tsk, Tsk. Bad girl, Kate. That is no way to repay me for that night. Now, be a good little bitch and stay out of my way this year, ok? I'd hate for you to lose a tooth because you couldn't be nice." Bella says before pulling away from her and looking at the other three girls.

"Stay away from her, or you deal with me. And I am threw, playing games." Bella warns and kneels down to pick up my books and stands and walks with me right next to her. "You cant watch her forever, Bella." The frail one says.

Bella stifens and looks behind her "Dont threaten me Irina, we both know what happens when someone makes a threat to me." Bella says in a harsh tone. Tanya smirks at Bella "How's single life treating you, Bella?" she asks.

Bella smirks "What single life? I still have Alice." she states. Tanya frowns but Kate laughs "Way to go for used goods, Bella." Kate says. Bella laughs a dark laught hat makes chills run down MY spine. "You should watch youre mouth Kate, last time i checked. Youre sisters were the sluts of the school. Say Hi to youre mom for me eh? she was a good lay, but now. Now i have the best." Bella says and with that she turns and walks with me.

After we take the corner Bella looks me over and frowns when I wince when she touches the back of my head. "I'm gonna kill them, are you ok Ness?" Bella asks looking at my eyes. Her eyes look furious, but she seems to have calmed her self down.

I nod "Yeah, I'm fine." I say and Bella frowns "I'm sorry, I didn't know they would be here today. They never come the first week of school." She says and I shrug "It's cool, Bella. I'm fine." I say and Bella frowns, "You're not leaving my sight for the rest of the day, clear?" Bella asks and the protective look she gives me makes me accept her demand.

The rest of the day is passed cool. I have CJ in all of my classes so far and he is a riot. In Math CJ introduced me to his best friends Tara and Johnny. They were cool; Tara was the complete kind of girl that if you said you would jump of a bridge, shed ask to join 'cause she was bored. Johnny was the quiet thoughtful one that even though he is only a year older than me, he was strong. He reminded me of Emmett and then JC was just the jokester.

We were walking to lunch when Tara stops me, "Holly shit. Johnny, CJ. It's her." She says and they both look to were she's looking. I frown, who are they talking about? I look over and I see Bella talking to Alice and a whole lot of other seniors. "It's who?" I ask. Tara looks at me like I'm crazy, like, only the coolest person in this shit hole town." She says.

CJ rolls his eyes at her "She's new." He reminds her. Tara shakes her head "NO excuses, you should know who I am talking about." She says. I frown. "NO idea." I say honestly. Who the hell are they talking about?

"The Bella Swan. Killer Swan, Player Bella, the hand of God." Tara starts saying to us and I have to hold back my laugh. "The hand of God?" I ask barely holding back my chuckles. "I heard she could make a girl cum in two minutes flat." He says. I role my eyes "Anyone can if they know how to do it." I say and he shakes his head. "When the hand of God makes you cum, it leaves you blacked out." Tara says.

CJ shrugs "I think she's all hype. No one can do all the stuff they say she can." He says. I hold back my laughter. Oh... they're gonna go apeshit when they realize she is my sister. "I dunno, I think she has that cool mysterious edge." Tara says with a grin. I lift an eyebrow "No, not gay. Just a girl crush." She says with a shrug. I nod with a chuckle "of course." I say and Johnny shrugs "CJ, she has the money and the looks. And it's best not to mess with the popular kid; you know how that will end." He says.

I smirk and sigh "You guys do know-" I'm cut off my Tara. "Holly shit, she is walking over to us with her girlfriend." She says and looks at CJ "Try and act cool." She snaps. CJ shrugs "She's all hype." He says and Bella walks over to us and Alice speaks up "Hey, Ness." She says and I smile "Hey Alice, Bella." I say and Alice smiles brightly at my friends, Bella nods at them.

"Who are your friends?" Bella asks, is she trying to be sexy? Her voice is all raspy and deep, also shes speaking really calmly. I shrug "Kids from my class." I say with a wink and Tara elbows me in the ribs. "Ow, I was kidding. This is, Tara, CJ and Johnny." I say. Bella nods at Tara and winks, she blushes and Bella chuckles.

"I'm Bella, Nice to meet you all." She says in her low voice. "Ness, h-how do you know Bella?" Tera asks. I smirk and Bella smirks. "Guys, this is my sister. Bella Swan." I say and Bella chuckles as my friends' faces go blank.

"Oh, I'm going to looooove this school." I mumble and Bella pats my back with a grin and Alice giggles.

**Johnnypov**

Oh...

**CJpov**

My, fucking...

**Tarapov**

God..

Oh… my… God… Bella Swan, the girl that is considered quite literally the best thing in all of Forks, just winked at me. And the new girl, who now that I think about it looks just like her, is Bella Swan's little sister?! How did i not notice sooner? Wait, Bella has this short rock start hair look, that looks like she just slept with someone. But, other then the hair, these girls are identical. Maybe Ness has a bit more of a round face, but i think that will change with age.

I just stared. No way. I'm friends with Bella Swan's little sister. Bella Swan has a little sister? Shit. I so didn't see this one coming… Well, now I know why Ness reacted that way when we were telling her about Bella. Oh!

Shit! I told Ness about Bella and how… Oh, shit… I just hope to God that Ness doesn't mention it. "Um... hi." I say in a calm voice. Ha! they said drama was a waste of time. Bella smiles brightly at me "Tara Samuels right?" she asks.

My mind goes blank, how does she know my name!? ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod. I nod, and Bella smiles "I know youre sister, Hanna. How's college going for her?" Bella asks. "Um, fine. S-she's doing fine." i say and Bella nods twice.

"TEll her I said hi." Bella says and Alice elbows her "Who are you saying Hi to?" she asks. Bella grins "Oh, some girl i knew way back wen." Bella says and Ness smirks "Thats Bella's way of saying, she slept with youre sister." Ness informs me. My jaw drops a bit and CJ laughs.

I punch his arm and Johnny says "I didnt know youre sister was gay." and i frown, "Neather did I." i said. Bella laughs softly "You didnt need to be gay for me to sleep with them." She coments and Ness grimaces "Ew, Bella. Just shut up. Can we go to lunch? Im starving." Ness state and Bella nods before looking at us, "WHy dont you join us? there is more then enough room." Bella says.

Ness nods at us and we agree. AFter we sit down Bella and Ness start to bicker and joke around. Slowly we start joining conversation untill we are all joking around. OMG! i am hanging out at the cool table on my first day of highschool!

Well, things certainly won't be boring with Ness around, that's for sure…

**A/N: Here it is, the next chap of Choices and Nessie's first day of school awwwwwwwwwwwww. I loved the last bit. REVIEWS are MANDATORY **


	83. Chapter 83

**A/N: And we are back! with a new installment of choices. When we last left of, Bella had helped her sister out of a little bind with the bullies on Nessie's first day. After that Bella and Ness seemed to have a nice relaxing laugh right before enjoying a peaceful and fiber filled lunch. **

**This installment was brought to us by FIBER-O. If you need fiber to get your stuff regular, grab a bowl of FIBER-O and you will be O-regular! Hahaha. **

**Fiber-o is not responsible for headache, back pain, diariah, vomiting, and any other medical ishues including snuggle bug, love bug or any type of bug, cuz bugs are grouse. In case of poisoning or foaming at the mouth please call poison controle because we cant be bothered. **

**I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT**

**CH.83**

**Apov**

I had to admire Bella. There was no other way to explain it. She… had this way about her, that maybe she couldn't take on the whole world like she thought, but she knew she could give it a run for its money. Hold it off, if maybe just for a little while. There was no doubt in my mind that Bella would always put others in front of herself.

She would help save anyone she could, and if she couldn't she would give them a shoulder to cry on. Never thinking that the real weight, the weight of the world, was on her shoulders. Her feet dragging with every step she takes, her shoulders always a bit slump from the weight of it all, the bag's under her eyes showing me exactly how many nights she has had no sleep; the permanent frown on her brow's showing me how much she was lost in her own thoughts.

Bella was my enigma. Just when I thought I had figured everything out about her, she would shift and show yet another new side that I would fall in love with. I trace the hairline of her forehead with my fingertips, down her ear, to her jaw then neck. I traced the curve of her shoulder delicately and slowly go down her spine and finish at her hips, where the thin satin blanket covered the rest of her body.

My eyes slowly travel up to her face again, my other hand the one I say leaning my head on I shift to look at her better. My Bella… when will you finally figure out you are human? That you need sleep and food, you need recreation and fun? You cannot obsess over things that will drive you insane.

I close my eyes slowly and hear Bella's deep breathing take over the room, her inhales and exhales taking the same amount of time. Her body no matter how tired she was, looked relaxed. I lean forward and kiss her temple, and her arm that was around my waist constricts, pulling me closer to her.

I keep staring at her, not being able to take my eyes off her. She is amazing. I know almost everything about her. Yet… sometimes, when we are like this… we feel like strangers still. So many thoughts in her head she prefers to keep secret. So many things she hides from me, for my own good, she says. But is it really? Or does she not tell me out of fear?

Fear…. Fear of what? A question I have been asking myself a while. It could be fear of losing me, yet we both know we kill each other with that option. Fear of being made fun of? I don't think I could laugh at anything she had to say. Fear of upsetting me, maybe? I could handle anything she would say. Fear…

Fear and Bella don't seem to be compatible, yet… Bella has felt fear. Not those stupid fears were you think something will go boo in the night. Bella has faced every woman's nightmare, seen it face to face. She has gone through loss, more than anyone ever should in a young age. Even more than anyone ever should in a _lifetime._

Bella was a survivor and a warrior. She was a victim as much as she hates to think of herself as week. Bella has been broken, shattered until nothing more of her remains. She has put herself back together, no matter how much she would think it was me. She learned to fix herself over and over after every disaster that hit her.

After a while, she would fix herself before the storm even hit her. Her walls grew bigger and stronger, and she isolated herself for a long time. I know that she, her very being, is her own enemy. I know that even if she despises Kate with all her being, she would stand up for her if Denali needed her.

You could draw out were her cycle of mental abuse started, right after her mother died. She would blame herself, she would accept when others would blame her. She would practically abuse herself, mentally. Blaming every innocent consequential thing on herself. She saw the world through a blackened veil, the shadows brought into focus while the light was blurred and distorted. She bore a cross that was beyond her capacity to carry, and she never faltered, letting her demons tear at her. After a while, she started to believe it. Until, she became it.

She became the thing she wanted everyone to be around her. A fierce wall, a fighter, a leader, a protector, a lover… that is when she let her inner diamond, her inner self, lose. That must have been how Isabella Marie Swan, the child… became Bella Swan, the warrior.

She turned herself away in to her own darkness, a darkness I haven't even cracked the surface of. A pain I know she still feels behind fake smiles and laughs. She became a mirror of darkest night and deepest obsidian, something strong, beautiful, and illusory. She tore herself down and then built herself up until there was no trace of that child left on the surface. Her true self, who I rarely get to see unless she is asleep. When she's with me… she has a wall up. Not a big one, but a small one. The lead safe, with cement and barb wire. A small box so well protected she can't even access anymore, where the child she used to be is locked up tight.

That… box that she has… is the only thing that has saved her from crossing that line to committing suicide all these years. That box is what has kept her sane and strong. Kept her fighting for a better life for this world, a better understanding as to why she is still here.

My Bella, sad as this may seem has been ready to die for at least… six years. My Bella does not fear death, but cherishes its promise of peace and silence. The promise that it will numb her out and let her find peace. My Bella has come close to dying many times and each time she would have gone gladly into Death's embrace had it claimed her.

Yet, it's the inner Bella, the child, which is not ready to die. It is the one thing that keeps pulling her back. It drags her out of that dark place; it lifts her up when she needs it. It is the child that Bella once was; the child who had a perfect life. That child is not ready to die.

I don't know if I should be happy for that child that exists in her, or sad that it will never be let out. Bella in her own darkness has become her own enemy; she has become the abuser of her own mind. Her harshest critic, her worst enemy. My Bella is an enigma.

She is my enigma. She is my puzzle. She is my prize and my treasure. She is my light and my dark, my rock and the water that drags me under. Bella, as I know her, is her own demon. And… I don't know if I should help free herself from her demon… or let her be, let her exist.

Let the child in her never see light again; let her protector guard her forever. Either way, I will always love Bella. She is my only love. I would give my life to protect her; I would give her anything just to save her.

But, Bella is not hollow as I made her seem. She is filled with emotion, pure and good. She is real and feels and is an amazing person. I was just entering the depth of her mind… or was it my mind? Protector Bella and Child Bella are the same… only that the child is so much more fragile than the Bella that everyone always sees will ever be.

To Bella, there is no difference, and if there is she will not say. She lives every day as if her last because she does not fear what the next day will bring. Yet, her inner child fears what the next minute will bring with it.

I kiss her forehead again, shutting my eyes to just enjoy our moment together. I hear Bella's breathing change and a large inhale. "Alice… what are you doing up?" she asks lowly as she shakes out her hair and looks up at me. I smile softly. "I was thinking." I say honestly.

Bella smiles. "Thinking is a dangerous hobby. It could lead you right off the edge of insanity," she comments and pulls me closer to her so that my front is against hers. I pull the covers up to our chests and she smiles a crooked little thing with the tips of her lips as she leans forward and gives me a soft kiss.

This is her weaker side, and before the kiss even finishes she is back to her own self. "Sleep beautiful, we have tomorrow," she says softly and kisses me once again. I noticed that instead of forever, she says tomorrow. Time, for her, is so short. Nothing is guaranteed until the exact moment it arrives.

I nod and tuck my head down and she rests her head over mine and kisses the top of my head as her breathing starts to even out. "I love you Alice," she mumbles, and I smile. "I love you, Bella," I say and she hugs me a bit closer before my eyelids drop.

Any Bella will forever be my Bella. I will not push her – I know better than that. Bella will show me all of herself in time, but for now. I must rest so she can rest. I must live, for her to live.

And so our next page is written in a passage of wind swept pages of a book, a never ending story in which I must continue to follow. I will find my Bella's heart and hand it to her. I will make her see what she has forgotten.

But for now, I pass the page on my chapter and rest my head. Another day brings another story to be told in my life. A fight with a demon that is more than a demon. But a darkness all that powerful, that none the less will then turn in to my own. For life brings a darkness, to turn in to light. And a light that will be turned in to darkness.

In a life, that is mine. My life, that is more than my own.

**A/N: short chapter, an insight to Alice's mind. See, she's not just a pretty face. I don't know when I will update, but hopefully soon. I hate dress shoping, -_- why cant i just graduate in jeans and a blouse? stupid puertorican colture...**


	84. Chapter 84

**A/N: Any of my readers interested in betaing WolfsBane? cuz, I have the first chap, just need to publish it to get started on the new one. PM me if you are interested. I would ask my supper amazing Beta but, have you been seeing what Undiscovered is dishing out? like what? 20 stories? got to give her credit, one bad ass writer. **

**I don't own twilight. Tho, my girlfriend was half asleep and she swore Carlisle was her dad and Alice was my sister. I'm still not sure if she was high or not. Love you Kat. :P **

**Ch. 84**

**Bpov**

I kiss Alice's cheek to break her out of her trance, she blinks rapidly and looks at me. I smile "Where did you go?" I ask softly. I kiss her cheek again "Um, flashback, of last night. Before you left." She says and I chuckle, "Really?" I ask kissing under her ear.

**Apov**

"Yeah, really." I say. Only not for the reason you think sweetheart. I finish in my mind. She smiles a bright smile her dark eyes with humor "Maybe I should sneak in your room tonight, keep the deck door open for me?" she asks lowly against my ear. I nod and a giggle escapes me as a soft laugh escapes her.

Bella pulls away and clears her thought "Um, I need a smoke." She says and I frown "You quit, I didn't honey." Bella reminds me and kisses the top of my head before standing up.

**Nesspov**

I look up as Bella stands and pats her pocket I lift an eyebrow and she smirks and nods toward the exit doors. I stand up and my friends raise an eyebrow at me "Um, I've been craving a smoke all day." I state. Tara grins, "What's your brand?" she asks. I smirk at her. "Djarum Black." I state.

"You have expensive taste." She states, I shrug "I do everything in good taste." I say tilting my head to the side. "Somehow that is hard to believe." She says smirking. "Why's that?" I ask. "Because you look like the type of girl that would love a cheap date." She says. I breathe out a laugh "Oh, that's not completely true." I say.

She lifts an eyebrow "I like a cheap fuck and an expensive date." I say with a wink and realize we were leaning towards each other during the conversation. I pull away and turn on my heels to fallow Bella, who was laughing silently at me and Tara's exchange. "Ness has a girlfriend, a very cute girlfriend." Bella sings under her breathe. I shove her playfully and we push to the back doors.

Bella has a cig in her mouth and light in a minute flat and I open my box and pick one out and she lights it for me. "Won't we get in trouble for smoking in school?" I ask. She grins "We aren't in school." She states and I role my eyes at her, "Smart ass." I say as I sit next to her and take a drag.

"You know, most siblings would be up your ass about you smoking at such a young age." Bella states blowing out a gust of smoke. "Then why don't you?" I ask looking at her. She takes a slow drag "Well, because that would be being a hypocrite." She says letting go of the smoke as she speaks. I lift an eyebrow "At what age did you start smoking?" I ask.

She scratches the back of her head "Um… eleven? I think." She says pursing her lips. I nod and after a second she asks about Tara. "So… you and Tara…" she asks shoving my shoulder. I take a drag and put out the cig, "There is no me and Tara." I say.

Bella grins and flicks her finished cig on to the wet grass "IF you say so." She says and takes out a bottle of breath spray and squirts it twice. She hands it to me and I use it once and hand it back to her. She nods to the door and I fallow after her.

**Bpov**

I push open the door to the cafeteria and walk back to our table and give Alice a small kiss. "Love you babe." I say and she grins "Love you too." She says. I bite my lip as I look around the room and narrow my eyes when I spot Kate and her sisters, I stand up "I'll be right back." I mumble as I walk over and when I get there I pull out Kate's chair and she falls back on the ground. I sit against the table as she scrambles up.

"What the fuck Swan?" she yells. I lift an eyebrow at her high voice and grimace a bit "Don't yell, were not five." I state and smirk at her "Well, most of us aren't." I say. Kate narrows her eyes at me and I smirk as I look around the table "Martha, you looked better with brown hair." I state and she ignores me. I shrug and look at Tanya and Irina.

"Hi, Bella." Tanya says. I offer a halfhearted smile "Hey." I say and I feel Kate grab on to my jacket with her beefy man hands. I look at her hands and then at her face with a lifted eyebrow "Hey, now. Play nice." I say and she shakes me once, I can't fight of the smile at how entertaining this is.

"Wipe the smile from your face Swan." She says. I put both of my hands on either wrist and give it a yank, she lets go and I push her away from me. My smile fades and I can feel the pure hatred I have for this girl take over quickly like a poison in my veins.

"You really shouldn't touch me." I threaten. She shoves my shoulders and I take half a step back, "Do that one more time." I challenge. She does and right before her hands even touch me I pull on them and send her face first in to her table. I grab the back of her jacket and pull it towards me and stick my foot out, she trips and falls on her back.

I place my foot on her neck, I can hear the huge buzz the lunchroom is making but I'm zoned out of that noise. I put pressure on her neck and her hands to my leg trying to push it off. "Don't tempt me Kate. It be so easy to just kill you." I say lowly.

She glares back up at me and I take my foot off her neck and land a kick on the side of her ribs as I step over her "Oops. Sorry, didn't see you there." I kneel down on one knee, "Stay away from my sister, lay a hand on her ever again and trust me. Teachers won't be around to save you." I say to her and I see her blazing eyes nod once. I smack her cheek degradingly "Good girl and… if you're as brave as you think you are, why don't you meet me after class? They can't stop that fight." I say and straighten up as Mr. Walters marches over.

"What is going on here?" he demands. I smile at him "Nothing, Kate just seems to be in a clumsy mood sir." I say. He narrows his eyes at me and looks at Kate who is standing up "That true?" he asks. She nods and after looking at me again "Twenty laps around the court at my class Swan." He says. I nod "Yes, sir." I say and walk back to the table.

Everyone is wearing identical scowls, "I guess Ness filled you in?" I ask. They nod and I nod "Don't worry ness, when the bell rings. I'll get her good." I say and Ness frowns "Didn't you just get her back?" she asks. I shake my head, "Nope that was just a warning." I state and look behind me to see Leah behind me.

"Hey, Leah." I say and stand up, she nods to the Packs table. "We need to talk." She says. I lift an eyebrow "Now you want to talk? After I freaking waited a whole day for you guys to show up and you all stud me up." I say and shake my head "You know what Leah? I'm not interested." I say fixing a stone glare at her.

"Bella don't be silly, we need to talk." She says. I purse my lips and look at the table, "I won't be long." I say and walk past Leah and sit on the far end of the table were the Pack is. "Bella." Jake says. I ignore him and Seth gives me a sheepish grin "Hey, Bells." He says. "Hey Seth." I say and look at all of them.

"We just wanted to apologize for Jake." Seth says. I shrug "I don't care about that." I say and Jake frowns. "I am sorry, Bella. To tell you the truth, it was a lie. A set up. We wanted to see if you would, um… react badly. But you didn't, so we wanted to apologize and reconcile." Jake says looking sheepish.

I nod and click my tongue before I stand up "Fuck you." I say and walk away toward my table. I sit back down and finish my lunch before its time to go to the rest of our classes.

**Nesspov**

After Bella's miniature fight in the lunch room the rest of my classes were buzzing about me being Bella's sister. Tara, CJ and Johnny were in all of my classes except first period so, at the least I had some new friends. With the knowledge of me being Bella's sister also came the girls, now… I couldn't complain.

I grin as I catch Sara Johnson staring at me. I wink at her and she blushes before turning away and I chuckle as I look at CJ who is gapping at me and Tara who looks.. proud. Johnny was on one of his own conquests and hey, my heart goes out to him. He was smooth.

I grin a bit and CJ shakes his head "Still thing you and your sister are all hype." He says and I lift an eyebrow. "Fine, pick any girl in this class. I guarantee I can get a date or a kiss." I say. Tara laughs "I am so in on this." She says and takes out five bucks.

"Five on Ness." She says and yanks Johnny over to our table "Lover boy, these two have a bet you in?" she asks. He shrugs "What's the bet?" he asks. CJ speaks up "That Ness can get a girl to go on a date or kiss her." He scoffs. Oh.. money from a baby.

I take out five and hand it to Tara. She grabs five from CJ and Johnny is left. "Well, you in or out?" I ask with a smirk. "Sorry, Ness. I don't think you can do it." he says and hands five to Tara. CJ and Johnny knuckle punch and me and Tara high five. "Take your pick." I say to CJ and he looks around as all four of us huddle up.

"Um… Steph Manson." He says. "Witch one is that?" I ask. "Brown hair, blue eyes, Skillet T shirt." He says. I nod as I pick her out all alone. Oh, CJ you just gave your money away. I nod and stand up but Tara pulls me back "I am counting on you, don't let me down on our first bet Ness." She says seriously. I chuckle "Cool it, I won't be long." I say and walk towards her.

I set up a simple game plan that worked fifty times in Phoenix and I "Knock" in to her desk tripping and bumping over to her. "Oh, are you ok?" she asks. I make eye contact, "Um… yeah…" I say and look down before I stand up straight. "Do you um, mind if I sit here?" I ask softly. "Oh, yeah. Go ahead." She says and I take a seat quickly. "I am so sorry, I bumped in to you. It's just… my head is swimming. A new place, new people, your eyes, knowing my sister." I ramble making a little 'mistake.'

Her eyes go wide, "What did you say?" she asks. "My head is swimming." I say tilting my head. "No after that." She says. "New place." I say and she laughs a bit "After that." She says nodding. "New people." I say suspiciously narrowing my eyes playfully at her. "And after that." She says.

I lean forward "Is this your type of twenty questions?" I ask looking deep in her blue eyes. There actually very nice. A deep blue. "N-no, not twenty questions. Just curiosity." She says. I nod "What did you say after new people?" she asks. "Knowing my sister." I say with a small smirk. "Now I think you are the one playing games." She says.

I scoff "I don't play games, per say." I say looking in her eyes leaning a bit closer. "I thought you said something about eyes." She says slowly. I nod "Yeah… I bet you are tired of hearing this but your eyes are so… blue, it's hypnotic… I don't think I can look away." I say and I stopped moving so she is inching forward. "Really?" she asks. I nod once, an inch away…. Come on…

"I've never seen eyes so… dark… are they black?" she asks. I shrug my shoulders but keep the eye contact "Close enough." I say and we kiss. Score! I cup her face and as soon as the kiss started it's interrupted by hoots and hollers. I pull away and she ducks her head on my shoulder as I lower my head in fake embarrassment.

I lick my lips and sit down next to her and give her a soft smile "I… I'm sorry." I say and she blushes "Um… don't worry. It's fine." She says. I frown "No, it's not. I really am sorry, but… I'd like to see you sometime.. hopefully out of school?" I ask softly tracing an imaginary line on her arm.

She nods and scribbles a number on a piece of paper and hands it to me. I grin at her "Thanks… I better be going back to my friends, I'll call you Steph." I say and with a last wink I walk back to my seat.

Tara hugs me and slides ten in my pocket before pocketing the other ten in her vest pocket and she grins at the guys. I shrug "Never under estimate the Swan charm." I say and we all go silent as class begins. After this class I have study hall witch I sit with Bella while she groans about hating school and if I ever get in trouble to tell her so she can bribe me out.

"Isn't that illegal?" I ask. She grins and leans over to my ear "Everything is legal unless you get caught and when or if you get cough, big sis is always there to get you out of it." she says before ruffling my hair. I laugh and push her away and I lean my arm on the table and rest my head in my palm.

"Bells.." I trail off. "Yeah?" she asks mimicking my position. "Um… what was dad like?" I ask not meeting her eyes. She's silent for a moment before her hand goes under my chin and makes me look at her "He wasn't a monster… he was lost, but then again… so are all of us. He was a complex man, Ness. No one, not even my mom knew exactly what went through his head. Jenks says I got that from him." She says her eyes glazed as if she is locked in a memory.

"He was a protector and a leader… just not.. um… not when I needed him the most but… he was a good man. He saved my life a couple of times, just like I saved his. He wasn't much a father, more of a provider. I mostly raised myself, but his dream was to go back in to war. He could do that when my mom passed away.. he was responsible for me and for the company. I wanted to fallow in his footsteps but… I had no one to take my place in the company." She says and blinks back and gives me a soft smile.

"I have no interest in fight in war anymore. I have Alice and you to look after.. even Kovu. Maybe… maybe I will enter someday… but not yet. Not until I'm sure you can handle a company." She says and I frown "Bella, that company is in your mom's family." I state and she shrugs "And you're in mine. Blood is blood, doesn't mater the type exactly." She says and I shake my head.

"I don't think I could ever handle a company." I state and she chuckles "I may nag about my job but it's mostly just signing and reading over papers and contracts. Meeting new clients and having board meetings every few months. Very basic things." She says and I laugh and she rolls her eyes and groans loudly.

"Working is killing me slowly and not in a fun way." She says leaning almost half her body on the table, her head looking at me. "is there a fun way to die?" I ask. She smirks and shifts so she is lying on the table and looking at the roof "If you only knew, Ness. If you only knew." Bella says.

We talk about simple things. Mostly Dad and joke around until gym. When we enter the Gymnasium the first thing I realize, Alice is in this class and second so is Kate. "Go with your class mates." She says and as soon as she walks in the coach yells at her. "Start on your twenty laps Swan." He yells and blows his whistle.

Bella smirks and salutes him "Eye, eye, ranger Joe." She says and he fumes "For that joke make it twenty five." He says. "Hell make it thirty." Bella yells laughing as she starts jogging around the gymnasium. "Thirty it is swan." He says and Bella stops to kiss Alice before she keeps running the laps.

I walk over to my group and se Tara ogling Bella. "She is sooo cool." She says and CJ nods "I have to give it to her, the chick's got balls." He says and Johnny comments "I think you mean tits." He says and I raise an eyebrow "Why are you checking out my sister, ew." I state and they grin "You're hot too, Ness." I look at them. "Shut up." I say shaking my head laughing as we sit in the benches waiting for coach to stop yelling at Bella.

"He's a little harsh on her, no?" Tara asks. CJ nods and Johnny too. I just stare as Bella runs her twenty sixth lap. She winks at me and starts singing "I don't know what I've been told, but Kate is a filthy ho. Sound of, one, two, three, four, she's tried them all." She sings and coach fumbles blowing his whistle "Swan! Get your but over here." He hollers and Bella wipes the sweat off her brow as she walks over to him.

"Yes, my captain." She says and fakes a soldier pose. I see the seniors crack up. "You think you are some jokester? Making fun of me in front of the freshmen?" he says. Bella's face is still serious "I didn't realize I was making fun of you, sir." She says and he sighs "Give me twenty." He says and Bella reaches her back pocket "PUSH UPS NOW!" he yells and Bella rolls her eyes.

"Will that be with one hand or two?" she asks. He smirks "Mixed." He says and she nods. She goes to the ground and does a normal push up and then she shifts so it's one armed. Then again normal, one arm. Normal, one arm. Normal, one arm. Normal, one arm.

After she has done all twenty it's close to half of the class. "Get in line Swan." He says and when Bella nods with no funny comment I can tell she is exhausted. Can't blame her, that was a harsh work out. Yet, when she looks up from the towel, she smirks.

Coach Walters starts making assistance and when he reaches me he stops and looks at the board again and then at me. "I didn't know, Swan had a sister." He states and looks at me. "Swan, get over here." He says and I walk slowly over to him. I chance a glance at Bella and she shrugs.

"Are you a jokester like your sister?" he asks. I frown "I don't think I am." I state and a few of the kids behind me chuckle. Fuck. "DO you think I'm kidding?" he asks glaring. "I didn't know you were allowed to kid." I state. More chuckles. Fuck! Will you guys shut up!

"Do you find me funny Swan? Do I have a red nose? Do I look like a clown?" he asks. I shake my head "I don't find you funny, sir. No you don't have a red nose." I state and the kids behind me crack up. "Excuse me?" he ask. I frown "Ok, I'm lost." I state and he glares at me. "Swan give me twenty." He yells.

I frown and stay still. "Did you not hear me?" he asks. I blink "Oh, um… I thought you meant Bella." I state and he huffs. Make it "Twenty five." He says and I gulp as drop down and start do to push ups. "Fuck you, Bella." I mumble under my breath.

"What did you say?" he asks. "Nothing." I huff as I push off the ground in my fifth push up. I keep dong them nice and slow and after my sixteenth I don't think I can do another. I huff as I push off the ground again and we heard hollering from the seniors.

When I look up I see Alice and Bella making out and Coach runs over to yell at her blowing his whistle and I groan and fall flat on my face before I role over on my back. Tara, CJ and Johnny look down on me as I pant. "I'm going to… kill Bella…. Then you…" I gasp and they smirk.

They pull me up and hand me a water bottle and I see coach walking back to us. "No one told you to stop, Swan." He says and I frown "I did all twenty five." I say. "What?" he asks. I nod "I did them all." I state and he looks at the class who nods in agreement. "Um, alright then. All of you give me five laps and we can call it a day. And Swan, I expect zero funny business from you tomorrow." He states.

I give him a sheepish smile and shrug "I'll try my best." I say and start my jog. I see Bella lying flat on her back just laughing as some other senior does something stupid and I appreciate that she looked out for me. I shake my head and keep looking forward. Maybe Forks isn't as bad after all?

**A/N: OMG, you guys would have killed me if you had read the first draft of this chapter. Lol, thank God I snapped out of it and didn't publish it. Have a good one.**


	85. Chapter 85

**A/N: For all those who read my story I want to inform that WOLFSBANE is being written and if you are interested in reading it check my profile. **

**I do not own Twilight, duuuuuh**

**Ch.85 shit, this story is oooold. **

**Bpov. **

After the bell rings signaling school is over we all head to the showers and quickly showers and get changed. After I throw my clothes back on I walk hand in hand with Alice and Ness walks in front of me with her friends joking and pushing each other around.

I look at Tara and Nessie's interaction and pull Alice closer to me. "They are going to date soon." I mumble against her ear. "Who?" Alice mouths. I nod to the front were Ness and Tara are exchanging numbers and after Ness walks her to the buss she walks back over to me.

I try to hold back my smirk, "What you looking at?" Ness asks. Alice sighs and pats Ness head "Ignore her, she's a bit crazy." Alice says and throws her arm around Nessie's shoulder. I lift an eyebrow "I'm not crazy," I say as I walk next to them "I'm just-umff-" I'm cut off a football connecting with my stomach. I double over wheezing for air, I try to inhale but it won't happen and I swallow as I try to calm my body.

I feel Alice and Ness hands on my shoulder and back as I struggle for a breath and when I finally catch one, I groan. I lift my shirt over my abdomen and sure enough, a small red circle from when the ball connected with my gut.

I struggle for a few breaths and straighten up waving off Alice and Ness as I look around for the jocks. I'm gonna shove it up there ass, I growl in my head but surprise, I see Kate smirking with another football in her hands. She winks and that's it, I throw my book bag and jacket off walking through the half-filled parking lot and Kate laughs and throws the football at me. I throw it at her face but she blocks it, "You are messing with the wrong bitch here, Kate." I say as I grab her jacket and throw her to the side so she smacks against her car.

She scowls and pushes off of the car and swings but I block it before I punch her gut and push her to the side. I run a hand threw my short hair and smirk "bring it on, no teachers to save you this time." I say and I hear the few students that are left yell "fight, fight, fight." I lift my punches above my face and wait for her move.

"What Kate? Scared of the big bad wolf?" I ask with a smirk at her. She throws a punch at me and it hits the side of my head I punch back and hit her jaw and she fucking grabs my hair and pulls me toward her. I punch her gut twice and push her away from me. "You really need to learn that you are nothing Kate. Nothing. You are fucking filth under my shoe, you're nothing compared to me." I taunt.

She pulls her fist back and that's my opening, I launch a punch to her nose, forgot about her hand, she hits my eyebrow. I shake it off and catch her foot, fuck, why must this girl also be in the same fighting club as me?

I throw her leg and she lands a high kick to my shoulder and I fall to the side, She lands a kick to my stomach, I reach forward and grab her shirt and pull her to me, she falls on her back and I role and straddle her lap I punch her face over and over and ignore the punches she actually lands on my face and body. I slam her against the concrete and that's when I hear the freaking police siren behind us.

F.U.C.K. M.E. I hear the cop run over to us and then I hear the spray. I hit Kate once more then I can't even keep my eyes open they are watering so bad. I start coughing and roll off her to my back and role a few feet. We hear yelling from the students and coughing. I groan as I try to wipe away all the shit from my face.

Then I hear the voice of the cop "Bella Swan, should have known this was about you." Sheriff Siena says. "What the fuck Siena? You trying to *cough, cough* kill me?" I yell at her, not looking anywhere because, well. I can't see.

I feel cold water connect with my face and start shaking my head "Will you calm down Swan." Siena says in a bored tone as she finishes throwing water on me. I feel a towel connect with my face and I dap at my face. I finally crack my sore eyes open to see her deputy doing the same but more gently with Kate.

I stand up and glare at her "What the fuck do you think you are Siena?" I ask at her. She smirks "Well, I think I'm the sheriff." She says. "Fuck you." I say before I turn around only bumping my hand with her forearm only to feel her grab on to my wrist with the cold handcuff and slam me against the ground and feel her knee on my lower back.

I still at that and she straps the other on. "Bella Swan, you are under arrest for Disorderly conduct and assault of an officer. You have the right to remain silent, everything you say, can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right for an attorney, if you cannot afford one, one will be assigned to you. Do you understand these rights as they have been read to you?" She asks as she lifts me off the ground.

She walks toward her police cruiser and I lean against her car as she helps the deputy arrest Kate and lock her in the squad car. Alice and her family rush to me, holding Ness close to their side. "Bella? Fuck, Bella you are so hurt. Are you ok? Why is she arresting you?" Alice asks cupping my face in her hands.

"Siena is arresting me for fighting and for supposedly assault of an officer." I mumble before looking at Alice. I swallow the blood in my mouth "Take Ness home for me, tell her mom that I'm sorry this had to happen on the first day. I need you to not tell your parents about this Alice, please. They hate me enough as it is." I say to her.

"They don't hate you, silly. I don't know if I can hide this from them, Bella." Alice says and I slam the back of my head on the police car "Fuck, um… ok. I'm gonna call Jenks with my one phone call and… I'll probably be under arrest for a few hours. I'll go visit you as soon as I can, ok sweetheart?" I ask.

Alice nods and I touch my lips to hers and look up to her family who are all wearing identical frowns at this, I lick my split lip "I know Siena, she's a tuff cookie but she's cool. I'm sure she's just going to lecture me and what not." I say to them and they nod.

"Ness… can I have a word with you." I say lowly. She nods and The Cullens go a few feet away and I give her a soft smile "Can I have a hug?" I ask, she looks from the ground to me, then steps closer and gives me a hug. "I'm so sorry you have to see this Ness. Fuck, your mom may or may not let us hang out for a while ok? But that's cool ok? I'll still see you at school and we can talk and it's not a big deal." I say and Ness nods and I wink at her.

"So... you and Tara?" I ask teasing and she rolls her eyes and walks away just as Siena walks over to me with a grimace. "Isn't she a bit young for you?" she asks. I shake my head "She's my little sister." I mumble and Siena laughs "About time you knew about that, Get in." she says and I sit in the car and she slams it. She talks to Alice for a second and after a minute she gets in the car and drives out. "You are in deep shit, Bella." Siena says.

I rest my head against the cold rail "Please, money talks Siena. Didn't your rich daddy ever tell you that?" I ask and she slams the breaks and I slam against the cold metal. "He also showed me that the law comes through every once and a while. Bella, you are responsible for yourself, you can't keep fucking up." She snaps at me. "Why do you care?" I groan. She turns her head to look at me "Because I used to be just like you." she says and starts to drive forward again.

After we get to the station she pulls me out and locks me in the same sell as Kate. "IF I hear any fighting in this room, you two will be in jail for a week." Siena says before she takes off my handcuffs and pushes me in to the room. I take the cot on the far end of the room and sigh as I look in the small mirror. "You hit harder now." I comment to Kate as I wash the blood on my face. "Yeah, so do you." she mumbles and after I sit down she does the same.

I lie down on the cot and look at the grey roof. "What is this, our one thousandth fight?" I ask bored. She coughs a laugh "Happy Anniversary." She jokes and I crack a smile. "Ah... I hate you." I chuckle. "Hate you more." She says and I turn to look at her, I lean on one elbow and lean up, "Why do you hate me? I mean, freshmen year we actually got along. I honestly can't remember why we started to hate each other." I state. Kate mimics my position and opens her mouth but frowns.

"I… I can't remember but I'm sure you started this crap." She says and I laugh as I lean against the wall, "Yeah… probably." I mumble. I flex my fingers and the gates open "One phone call." Deputy Marc says and hands us both a quarter. I quickly dial Jenks number and as soon as I tell him everything he tells me he was in NY and that he will fly over and get me out… until three days.

"Jenks! I'm you're freaking boss! Get your ass over here right-" "If you would like to continue this conversation please add another twenty five cents." The voice says. I slam the phone on the handle and walk back to the cell.

I lie down and yell in frustration. Kate walks in and sits on her cot. "Any luck?" I ask. She groans "Nope, Mom and Dad are in Seattle for the week and Tanya and Irina don't have the cash." She says. I sigh "I'm in here until my fucking uncle decides to show up." I say and Kate chuckles.

"What? Money can't get you out of this one?" she asks. I look at her "Money can get me out of a lot, but not with Sheriff Siena." I sigh and lay back down. "What's so different about her?" she asks. "She was like a mentor for me growing up, one day she just vanished. Come's back two years later, a whole new person. Now, she's trying to make me in to a responsible adult." I mock her words as I stare at the roof.

"Did you really sleep with my mom?" Kate asks suddenly. I look at her and shrug my shoulders "Wouldn't you like to know." I joke. "Shit, Swan. I was trying to have a nice conversation for once that doesn't involve beating the living shit out of each other." She says. I glare at her "This could be a nice conversation if you hadn't tried to beat up my little sister and break me and Alice up." I say seriously.

Kate glares at me "Let's go back to ignoring each other, ok?" she asks. "Cool with me." I snap back at her and just relax against the cot. After an hour or so I start pacing. "Will you sit still, you're making me dizzy." Kate says. I can't help but laugh a bit, "I'm sorry." I say and look around for a newbie cop. Once I spot one I call for him.

He walks over and I smile a bit "Hey, I really need to get out of here. What if I gave you…" I reach for my wallet and open it up. "Two hundred bucks to let me out or call for someone so they can get me out." I say. He looks at me seriously "Are you trying to bribe an officer?" he asks. I takeout two hundred dollars more "Four hundred?" I ask. "Excuse me?" he asks. I feel Kate pull me back and she steps forward.

"I'm sorry for her, she's just nervous. Nothing more officer." Kate says and the officer walks away Kate looks at me "You are fucking crazy. You can't bribe a cop, you can get jail time." She says. I sigh and count out my cash, "Ok, I have five hundred bucks on me, what about you?" I ask. She lifts an eyebrow "I got fifty." She states.

I sigh and put my money back and look at my credit cards. "I have a freaking black card for god's sake, I can pay my way out ten times and not put a dent on my money." I say and Kate chuckles to herself. "What kind of a person walks around with five hundred bucks in there pocket?" she asks. I frown "I used to walk around with a couple thousand in my wallet for this exact reason but since I had to give Ness's mom some cash for Nessie's clothes and some bills, so I'm down cash." I say.

"I didn't know she was your sister." She states. I shrug "It's still not cool to pick on freshmen." I state. Kate sighs "You're right, it's not.. I was just entertaining Irina and Tanya." She states. I look at her and study her features. "I didn't sleep with your mom." I state.

Kate looks up and I shrug "You're mom hit on me and we went to her bedroom, but as much as I love cougars she didn't need to cheat, she needed someone to hear her issues with your dad. I listened and then we feel asleep on the bed. In the morning I woke up put my jacket on in the hall and walked out of your house. I didn't know your sister was watching." I state.

"Then why fallow threw with it?" she asks. I smirk "You're mom of all people asked me to confirm it because, your father finally found her attractive again after she had a lesbian experience." I laugh lowly. "My mom…wow. Um, she's fucking crazy." Kate states.

"She's wild… she's a hell of a kisser though." I say and Kate grimace's. I laugh "I was joking." I laugh and Kate throws the flat pillow at me. I catch it and throw it back and lay down on the cot. "We're going to be here a long while." I say.

Kate sighs "Don't remind me." she mumbles and I chuckle. "One hundred bottles of bear on the wall, one hundred bottles of bear, take one down. Pass it around,-" Kate cuts me off "If you sing that song I will kill myself." She states and I can't help the guffawing laughter that escapes me.

Siena passes through and leans against the cell. "Hope you two like spending time here. Going to stay here at the very least until Saturday unless you pay bail." She says. Me and Kate look at each other rand somehow the same thought crosses us.

'Can't get any worse' and we laugh it off. Siena gives us both an odd stare before walking away. Me and Kate after a while stay silent, just nothing to say I guess. Siena gives us a pizza and two coke plastic bottles and leaves us be.

Me and Kate eat in small talk, not knowing what to say to each other. Most is just common events. If we are trying out for sports, school work, classes, teachers, graduation, parties.

After we finish our food Sine hands us mouth was and two blankets before saying goodnight. We 'brush' our teeth as best we can with the mouthwash and then we go to sleep in the quiet jail. I'm used to it, but I could tell Kate wasn't.

"Kate?... pssst, Kate." I whisper. She sighs "Yeah?" she asks. "You couldn't be in a safer place then in a police office, in a jail cell and with me close to the door." I comment and lay back down. "I wasn't scared." She states. I shrug "Just thought I'd let you know." I comment. I don't fall asleep until I'm sure Kate is asleep first. Then, I let myself drift in to a boring, empty sleep.

**A/N: hope you guys like it. Review! **


	86. Chapter 86

**A/N: one, two, three. Hey, we are live at the world premiere of choices, what up ya'll people. **

**I do not own Twilight, how do you people still not know this?**

**Ch.86**

**Apov**

Bella, what the fuck have you gotten yourself in to. That is what I want to yell at her as she is pulled in to the cop car and drove away. I walk over to Ness and grab Bella's jacket and search the pocket for her car keys. Once I find them I throw mine at Emmett.

"Drive my car home. I have to drop off Ness and call Jenks." I say and Emmett nods and I see Edward place a hand on my shoulder. "I'll go with you." he says and I nod and we walk over to Bella's car and I drive. Ness sits in the back quietly and I look at her and offer her a smile.

"Ness, you worry too much. Its Bella, nothing is going to happen." I say and she nods "yeah…. Nothing is gonna happen." She says and I pull out and drive out to Clare's house. All during the ride I had a silent conversation with Edward. Somehow ever since we were little we could have conversations with the minimal facial expressions.

I lift my eyebrow and chance a glance to see him role his eyes. 'I am not being stupid, my girlfriend is in jail Edward' I think and glare at the road. I hear him sigh and lean his head back on the seat. 'You are not just letting me deal with this alone' I think as I punch his arm.

"Will you two just speak out loud?" Ness snaps me out of my silent thoughts. "Sorry, Ness." I say and she shrugs it off and looks back out the window. I pull out in front of Clare's house and as soon as Edward gets out Ness hops out and walks inside. Moments like this, I saw how much they are acutely alike.

I sigh and walk with Edward to Clare's front steps. "Bella, thank you for- oh, Alice. Nice to see you again, and who are you?" she asks. Edward smiles "I'm Edward, Alice's brother." He says and they shake hands. "Where is Bella?" Clare asks. I frown "Can I come in?" I ask. She nods and we walk to the living room.

"Did Nessie and Bella have a fight? Ness stormed up to her room awfully fast." She says. I lick my lips "No, Ness and Bella didn't fight." I say and Clare seems to relax. "But, Ness had a bully problem today and Bella being the protective sister she is got in a fight after school. The cops had to break it up and she is momentarily…" I trail off and Edward cuts in "Detained." He finishes and I nod in agreement.

"She…. She was arrested. On her first day of school?" Clare asks. I nod "Yeah." I say and run a hand threw my hair. "She's a hot head, just like Charlie." Clare sighs and stands to walk around a bit. "In her defense she was instigated on multiple occasions by the aggressor." Edward says and Clare shakes her head. "Bella is an adult; she should know the consequences of her actions. But to act such a way in front of Ness? I don't know if you realize this but, Ness is an impressionable child. If she thinks it would suit her she will act the same way as someone even if it's not good." Clare says.

I grimace "Clare, Bella told me to apologize to you. She didn't mean for this to get so out of hand." I say trying to defend Bella. "She doesn't mean to get in these messes, they seem to just happen and she gets caught in them." I say.

"Well, you can tell Bella that she won't be able to see Ness until further notice." Clare snaps. I sigh and nod at Edward so we can head out. "Ok… I'll tell her. Sorry again Clare." I say and Edward and I walk out of the house and I hop in the car.

"This situation is so fucked." I mumble as I lean my forehead on the steering wheel. "Ok, we need to stop at the house to get Kovu." I say and put the car in gear and launch it forward. I drive in silence to Bella's house, the purr of the motor calming me as I try to think of a way to get Bella out tonight. I stop at Bella's house and walk up the porch, Edward right behind me as I use my key's to open the door and as soon as I enter I hear Kovu bark before he realizes who I am and runs to me and jumps on me.

I scratch behind his ear "hey, baby. What's wrong big boy?" I ask and I see him look behind me and run to the door but then back at me. "No, mommy isn't coming home tonight but surprise, you're coming home with me." I say and I tell Edward to grab the leash in the closet as I walk to the living room.

I grab a few empty bottles of beer we had last night and look around and walk to the kitchen and throw them away. I walk back to the living room and see something on the floor next to the coffee table. I kneel down and grab it and see that it's a metal tube, a small thin tube. I frown and look around until I spot it.

The blade and the white marks on the coffee table. I hear Edward walking toward me and I slip the tube in my jeans and put a magazine over the stain and blade as I stand straight. "You done, Alice?" he asks. I look at him and at the dog. "Um... almost. Give me one second." I say before I run up the stairs full speed up to Bella's room. Once I reach her room I see that it's tidy except for some article of clothing at the foot of the closet. I walk to her dresser and open the first door and dig through the side.

I hold the lump in my throat when I find a bag of pills in it. I place it on top and the metal tube too. I dig in the next one and find two bags of pills, identical to the first bag and a small tube of blow. I shake my head and dig in her other doors, empty. I check her sock drawer and find a bag of weed and two blunts in it. I put it in the pile. I walk over to Bella's closet. I know her; I know she has more than that small tube of blow. I search the book shelf in her closet and find a small box with a lock on it. I lift the box and shake it and see the key under the box. I grab it and open the lock and, jackpot.

There in the black metal box is a block of cocaine. I cover my mouth with my hand and look inside the box and see pain meds in it and a few pictures in it. In one of those pictures there is of me and Bella in the meadow laughing. I can see Bella's eyes shining with happiness. Such an odd thing to see in her eyes. I flip the picture over and see the writing.

**The only reason to live, the only reason to fight. The only reason I don't make this choice.**

I read it and frown, I don't understand. If I'm the reason why she's staying clean… what about those lines? I grab the other picture and its one of her and her mother and father.

**Forgive me father for I have sinned. Words I repeat every night even when I have lost my faith. I have lost my path, my will to live. The reason I must make this choice. **

I feel more confuses as I grab the next photo and stop cold. It's a VS picture. Lefts side is Bella and Siena looking awfully cozy. The right, Bella and the green eyed, blond haired Veronica.

**Who to love? Siena the one who left me. Or Veronica, the one I left. Bad choice's…. Good choice's… there just words. Actions, actions act louder. **

I… I shouldn't be reading these. It's obvious Bella kept this hidden from me. Fuck it, I'm done being the push over. Bella won't talk about this; I'm going to make her. I put the pictures back in the box and the block. I walk over to the dresser and grab everything except the weed. I put everything in the metal box and close it up. I slip the weed in Bella's jacket pocket and after that I close her door shut and walk down the steps.

As soon as we make it home Kovu is out of the car and running over to greet my family. I laugh lowly as I walk up the steps and see Mom and Dad talking in the living room. I try to walk past unseen but, Kovu ratted me out. "Alice, come in here." Dad asks and I slowly walk over and he motions so I sit on the couch.

"We just received a call from Bella's uncle, Jason Jenks." Mom says. I morph my face in to a steady mask, "really? Jenks called? What did he want?" I ask tilting my head to the side. "He asked you're father and me if we could let Bella stay here for a few weeks…. He… he's trying to punish her for misbehaving." Dad says.

I frown "He's not Bella's dad." I state. Mom nods "No, he's not. But he is her legal guardian until she is 21. And her father left Jenks in charge of the estate and everything else. Not permanently, but with a big about of power to freeze her accounts and make her learn her lesson." Dad says.

"She's being punished for defending herself and her little sister? That's absurd Dad." I state. He shrugs "We agreed." Dad says and I lift an eyebrow and a small smile slips on my lips "Bella's staying over for a few days?" I ask exited.

Dad nods and smirks "She is not allowed to enter your room with the door closed, enter your room at night and after school she is to come back here directly." Dad states. I frown "oh, come on! Rose and Emmett share a room for god's sake!" I say and Dad frowns.

"They do not share a room, their rooms just happened to be right next to each other. And Bella's temporary room will be located across from Edwards." He says. "That's in the other side of the house from mine!" I say and Mom and Dad laugh.

I shake my head and laugh at the humor of the moment before I call Kovu up with me. I walk up the steps and walk over to Jazz's room and knock. "Come in." his voice says and I open the door as I slide in "Hey, Jazz." I say before I lay on his bed and Kovu curls up on his carpet.

"Hey, Ali. What brings you here?" he asks putting down a book he was reading. I look at him, and dig in my pocket and throw the bag of weed at him. His eyes shine and he looks at it and looks at me, "Where did you get it?" he asks. "Bella's place." I state looking at the roof.

"Want to go catch a blunt?" he asks and grabs a big dictionary and puts the stash there and grabs one blunt from the bag before hiding the bag back in the case. I laugh "How is it that mom and dad never do drug inspections in your room?" I ask leaning on my elbows.

He shrugs, "Maybe because I hide it somewhere they will never find any drugs." He says and I nod and stand from the bed and me and Jazz walk to the corner of the house and he pulls down the string for the attic and I look at Kovu and tell him to go find food as I climb up to the attic and jazz fallows after me. Me and Jazz walk to the small window at the back of the attic and open it up as we light up.

I take the first drag and hold the smoke in as I look out the window and hand the blunt to Jazz as I exhale out the window. Jazz hands it back to me and I take another drag. "Bella's staying over for a few weeks." I state and he lifts an eyebrow and smiles "that's good, right?" he asks blowing out smoke. I shrug "It is for me, not sure she will like it much." I state.

He frowns "Why is that?" he asks. I take another drag holding it in and closing my eyes at the burn before I blow it all out in a gust. "Because, she's an isolated person. She needs her space; she doesn't do well in crowds. She doesn't like lots of people, Jazz. She's not used to the concept of family." I state and I see as Jazz nods with his eyes closed and opens them to blow out the smoke.

A slow smile creeps up his lips and matches mine. "Well, maybe this is her chance to get involved with our family." He states. I take a slow drag and hold it in as I think it threw then blow out the smoke "I never told her you guys know." I state.

He looks at me "Are you crazy?" he asks. I shrug "We were fine; I didn't find the need to fight with her. I didn't want to fight with her. I just wanted my relationship back and after that happened… I forgot." I state and hand the half-finished blunt to jazz.

"Meh, she won't find out." He says and we slowly finish the blunt. When we come down from the attic we walk over to Em, Eddie and Rose who were in the living room and me and Jazz sit on the couch and Rose looks over and laughs. "You two are baked." She states.

Me and Jazz look at each other and bump fists and Eddie looks over at Jazz and laughs "Where did your eyes go Jazz?" he asks and he winks. "If mom see's your guys eyes you are both screwed." Em says. I shrug "I'll say that I was napping and Jazz can just say the same or that he was reading a romantic novel and was crying…. Again." I say and we burst out laughing.

"Shut up." He says and grabs the bowl of chips and we start munching on them. "Someone has the munchies." Rose quips and I nod as I take a drink of her cup of soda. "So, any idea when they're letting Bella out?" Em asks. I shake my head "No idea, but I bet she's at least suspended for the rest of the week." I state.

"So? Its only three days, she will survive." Em says. I role my eyes "She's spent weeks in jail Em, she's used to the cots." I state and Em shrugs. "I dunno, I think I can get her out with the black card she gave me but I'll have to ask her first." I state and all my siblings look at me.

"You have a black card?" Edward asks. I nod "Right, I forgot Bella has you all wifed up." Rose says. I shrug "I told her I didn't want it but she made this whole deal about how it was just money and she would have more and… she distracted me." I state.

My siblings all snort and start laughing and I flip them off. "Kovu!" I yell and I hear him running over to me. As soon as Kovu shows up I sit on the ground and start to run my hands threw his hair and cuddle in to his fur, "Is he Bella's dog or you're dog?" Jazz asks. I shrug "Both, but mostly Bella's dog." I state. "You are so wifed up." Jazz says.

I chuckle, "I really don't mind." I state and Rose nods at me. "I need to call Jenks." I sigh and grab my cell. I dial up the number and after two rings I hear the thick Italian accent of Bella's uncle. "This is Jenks." He says and I crack a smile. "Hello, Jenks. It's me Alice." I say and the guys put mute on the TV and I put my phone on speaker.

"Alice? Ciao, how are you?" he asks happily. I smile to myself "I'm fine, Jenks." I say and he cuts me off. "I told you a thousand times, Alice. I tell you once more. It is Uncle, Uncle Jenks. Now, how can I help you my darling?" he asks.

I laugh softly and look at my siblings who are all fighting off there smiles. "Well, I was wondering when you could pass by to release Bella from Jail." I state. He is silent "Have you spoken to your parents no?" He asks. I nod "Yeah, I have. But, Jenks. You can't leave her in the jail cell." I state.

"Mira mi amor, it's nothing personal against Bella. I am on my way now to release her and her little friend. Then, I will try and explain to her that I am cutting her off and she is to stay at your house until further notice." He states. I nod "ok, thank you Jenks. Tell me when you get here so I can go with you to release her, please?" I ask.

He laughs lowly "Of course, my moncheri. Anything for my small diamond. I will bring gifts; I have a surprise for you my diamond." He states. I laugh at his pet name for me. "Ok, Uncle. I will see you soon, ciao." I say and he laughs "Ciao, bellisima." He says and we hang up.

I laugh and my siblings roar with laughter. "Is he crazy?" Emmett asks. I shrug "He is a bit, but he is a blast." I state. "What's with all the pet names?" Rose asks. I shrug "He's always had a pet name for me. When we went to France, he called me Daisy for five hours until Bella snapped at him and he called me diamond behind her back." I state.

"He sounds like an interesting man." Jazz says. "Oh, you should hear his stories Jazz; you're going to die laughing." I state as I sit back on the couch. "He sounds fun." Eddie says. I role my eyes "You could try to be more enthusiastic, though I bet you five bucks he hits on mom." I state.

Emmett and jazz bet against me and I smirk as I lean my head on Eddies lap. "Taking money from a baby." I mumble as I let Eddie run his hands threw my hair and I slowly start to fall asleep.

**A/N: here is the chap, hope you all liked it. Review ? yes? Thank you!**


	87. Chapter 87

**A/N: Read and Review. Read and Review. Read and Review. REVIEW! AND Read. This chap is dedicated to, two readers that we all really owe a lot to. A couple that is in the US armed forces and are literally both my heroes. To Charlene and Nickie, best of luck to the both of you! **

**I do not own Twilight, how do you people still not know this?**

**Ch.87**

**Apov**

_Bella snuggles in to my neck and starts to place open mouthed kisses there. I tilt my head up, humming in pleasure. "You like that baby?" Bella asks as she starts to kiss and lick at my throat. I hum and moan her name. I hear Bella panting as she licks at my neck and I giggle before moaning her name. Then I hear it, someone call my name. _

I wake up with a jump and realize Kovu is licking my cheek and I look up to see all my siblings roaring laughter, including my parents laugh. I feel my blush cover my face as I scramble up to stand up and run a hand threw my hair.

"You feel asleep waiting for Jenks." Mom says but I can see the humor in her eyes. My eyes go wide and I look at them "Y-you didn't hear that? Did you?" I ask. Emmett roars out a laugh "Bella, oh, Bella. Mmmm, right there Bella." Emmett mimics my voice. I throw a pillow at him and my siblings laugh.

"Oh, my god." I groan as I sit back down. I feel my slick panties and blush harder, "Alice, maybe you want to go upstairs and fix your hair?" Rose offers trying to hold back a laugh. I nod "Yeah, I need to fix my hair." I mumble and Kovu fallows me up the stairs.

He hops on my bed as I quickly take off my pants and change underwear. After I put my pants back on I use some hair spray to re do my hair and smile at my reflection. I look at Kovu and sit next to the bed and scratch behind his ear.

I hear his soft groan of approval and his leg shaking. I chuckle as he rolls over and stands on the bed, his tail wagging. I grab the tennis ball and look at him "You want this? You want this boy?" I ask and he barks. I run off down the stairs hearing him chase after me. I laugh as I run around and go out the back door. I hop over the railing giving me a lead over Kovu as he runs around and once he reaches me I throw the ball as far as I can.

Kovu chases after it and after he catches it runs back and drops it in my hand. "How are you trained?" I wonder to myself. He barks twice and I launch the ball far away. "Bella is going to be here soon, Kovu." I mumble as i grab it from his mouth and launch the ball out again.

**Bpov**

"You're lucky Jenks came over to save you, Bella. I'll be keeping a close eye on you." Siena says as she takes my cuffs off. I role my eyes "Bye Siena." I mumble and look back at Kate who is sat in her cot. "Kate, what you doing?" I ask. She looks up "What you mean, I'm waiting till Sunday." She states. I laugh "No you're not, come on." I say nodding to the door and she frowns before she fallows me out. We walk out and almost instantly I see the shiny black VMW Jenks rented.

I look over my shoulder to see Kate walking down the street and I light up a cig as I walk over to the car. I get in the passenger side and lower the window and give Jenks a quick hug "Thanks for coming Jenks." I say as I take a drag and blow it out the window.

"How are you doing, Bella?" he asks. I shrug "I've been doing better." I mumble and he sighs and we quietly drive towards my house. Ten minutes later we enter my house and I whistle for Kovu, "Kovu! Here boy!" I yell and hear nothing. I frown "Alice told me she has him." Jenks says and I nod as we walk over to the living room.

He looks around before sitting, "Bella, I think you know we need to talk." He says. I sigh and sit down on my recliner. "I know." I mumble. "First of all, what were you thinking getting in a fight? Especially when Siena of all people is your sheriff! You have any idea how many dollars I had to throw under the desk so that her supervisor told her to leave it?" he asks anger and exasperation in his tone.

I smirk "Who cares Jenks?" I challenge looking up at him threw my bangs. "It's my money." I state. "No, it's your father's money." He snaps at me. I stand up "My father doesn't own shit! It's my company and my money." I half yell at him. He stands up and I forgot he is taller than me.

"You will not raise your voice at me Isabella Swan. I am not your father or any other employer." He says coolly and I glare up at him, "You're the only person who thinks you're above me by using full name, never use it again. It will be the last time." I spit as I look over and turn the fireplace on. I warm my fingers.

"Second, what the hell is this petty childish rivalry you have with the Denali girl? What is this, the twentieth time I need to show my face and money to get you out of this place?" he asks. I shrug "At least you're doing part of your job." I snap at him as I look over my shoulder.

I see Jenks take a deep breath before he sits down; I sit on my recliner and sigh "How did it feel to see your daughter again?" I ask him. He laughs lowly "Oh, I was happy. She almost punched me." he mumbles. I shrug "Serve's you right for sending her off to boarding school and never spending a holiday with her when she was back." I say with a shrug.

"You're lucky Charlie didn't send you to one." He snaps. I laugh a bitter laugh "Please, Charlie was worse than a fucking boot camp." I mumble before I walk to the kitchen and grab two beers. I hand one to Jenks and sit back down and take a gulp of mine.

"You do know I am still your legal guardian until you are twenty one." He sates. I shrug "What has it been four years? Now you want to take responsibility. Please Jenks, you don't have the backbone." I laugh as I take another gulp.

"You're cut off." He says and I swallow slowly and look at him a smile playing on my lips "What?" I ask humor lacing my tone. "You are cut off." He says. I lean forward, my elbows on my knees "and what exactly am I cut off from?" I ask. "Starting today all your bank accounts are frozen. Every single one. Whatever cash you have on you will be your only income until further notice." He says.

I laugh and lean back "It's my money Jenks, what are you doing to do? Rob me?" I ask and take two more gulps of my beer. "No, it's your money. But I do have the power to freeze all accounts, if I see fit." He says. I finish my beer and put the bottle on the coffee table, "Jenks, I am one of the richest young adults in the world. I own around ten beer factories, own vast lands in real state. Own companies and have around five vineyards. And you think that I will let some glorified assistant take that away from me?" I ask as I stand up and laugh lowly.

This whole situation is moronic. "Jenks, the only reason you aren't fired is because you are close to an uncle to me. I love you as one, but if you think for one second that you control any aspect of my life, I will throw you under the bridge in a second flat." I say my voice taking the dark tone I mimicked from my father.

Jenks stands and walks until we are face to face "You don't intimidate me, Isabella. You don't manipulate me, you are a child. I thought, you were old enough to realize the error of your foolish ways but it seems niet. So, from this moment on you are cut off." He says looking down at me. I keep my glare and he glares down at me, not one of us breaking eye contact.

"Go to your room, pack your bags. You are staying at the Cullen house until we see fit." He says and I realize suddenly that his accent has gotten a looooot thicker then I remember it to be. I clench my jaw and stare up at him "You really are fucking lucky you are my uncle." I growl out before I walk past him and walk up stairs. I grab a quick shower before i pack all my things.

**Jenks Pov**

"You really are fucking lucky you are my uncle." Bella growls at me as she glares before walking past me. As soon as I hear her go up the stairs I let my back relax and I sigh as I walk over to the fire place "Oh, you have no idea how lucky I really am." I mumble and wipe the sweat off my forehead. I look over at the painting of Charlie over the mantel.

"Charlie boy, you really did do a number on that girl. I hope you are happy, you left not only one daughter but two. And none of them really knows what it's like to feel a father. My old friend, what you had become." I mumble sadly as I shake my head and close the railing and glass so that the fire can burn out. I close all the windows and doors while Bella works up her things to come down.

I look over the room before walking off to the foyer where Bella walks down with her sunglasses on and a duffle bag over her shoulder. She has a jacket on her free hand and a small frown of disgust on her lips as she walks past me without a word.

I sigh and walk out of the house shutting the door behind me.

**Apov**

I hear the sound of car doors slamming and run around the side of the house to see Bella grabbing a duffle bag out of the back seat. "Bella!" I say happily and she turns with a smile on her lips. I run over to her and she opens her arms and I launch forward and she catches me only taking a step or two back before she holds me tight.

"Hey, beautiful." She mumbles on my ear before dropping me down and without another word I go in for a kiss. The kiss progresses almost instantly in to a make out and I feel Bella smile against the kiss as she cups my face in her hands. "God I missed you." she mumbles against my lips and I wind my arms around her neck pulling her closer.

She pulls apart when she hears a throat being cleared and quickly her face goes neutral as she sees Jenks standing next to her. "Bella, go inside. Carlisle and Esme will be there and I will join in shortly." He says. "Funny time you decide to act like a parent eh, Jenks?" Bella growls before grabbing the duffle bag of the gravel and walking in to the house.

I grimace at Jenks "I get she didn't take it very well?" I ask. He laughs lowly "Oh, not at all. I think she hates me now." He says as he gives me a quick hug and a kiss on each cheek. "Well, what can we do Jenks?" I state rather then ask with a shrug and he laughs as he fallows me in to the house.

We walk in to the living room where the whole family is at. "Mom, Dad. This is Bella's uncle Jason Jenks." I introduce them. Dad extends his hand "Nice to meet you Mr. Jenks, I'm Carlisle Cullen." He says and after he's done shaking hands. Jenks smiles "Please, call me Jenks." He says and bows down to kiss mom's palm "and who is this Alice? You're sister?" he asks and I see Bella face palm on the couch as I laugh.

"No, Jenks. That's my mother." I say and he frowns. "Your mother? This delicate flower can't be older than twenty five." He says and Bella groans "Jason, please. Just shut up." Bella mumbles and Jenks rolls his eyes and nods at mom. "Nice to meet you Mrs. Cullen." He says with a wink and mom speaks up "Please, call me Esme." She says. He nods.

I look over at Emmett and the guys and smirk, they all frown. Ha! I won the bet! I see Dad place his arm around mom's waist. "I apologize for young Bella's behavior. It seems she has a bit of growing up to do." He snaps at her. Bella smirks "And maybe you have some job searching to do in your future, eh, Jason." Bella says in a dark tone. I frown and sit next to her "Bella." I say and she frowns but shrugs.

"Now, who are all these young individuals?" Jason asks. Dad speaks up "These are my children. Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, Edward and of course you know Alice." He states. He greets them all before sitting down "Well Alice has said nothing but good things about you all." He says and I role my eyes.

"Same." Carlisle says and mom nods. "Now, I am just wondering about Bella's sleeping arrangements." Jenks says. "Well, she will sleep in the spare room on the third floor across from Edward." Carlisle says. I take Bella's hand in mine but I feel that she has a wall up. She's not here with us, she's miles away somewhere in her thoughts.

"And she has her car here so, she has transportation. I imagine she will have a curfew?" Jenks asks and Bella's head snaps over to him as she laughs. "You're kidding? You're completely demented." She states laughing. "What are you on about this time?" he asks. "Me, a curfew? Jenks, I haven't had a bedtime since I was ten. I don't care who you push me off to, you don't control my life." She says taking off her sunglasses and glaring full blown at him.

He doesn't even acknowledge it and that seemed to piss Bella off even more than anything. "Y-yes she will have a curfew like my other children. At 11:30 on weekdays and 12:30 on weekends." Dad stays trying to asses the situation between them both. Bella leans her head in her palms "This is absurd, Jason. Leave these people alone, fill your wallet with money and get back to Italy and do your job." Bella says lowly.

"This is part of my job." He says and she stands "Then where have you been for the past four years? You want to act like a parent, speak to your daughter Siena and leave me alone." Bella says coldly as she glares at him. She looks at my parents "If I may be excused to my… room." She says her voice cracking with the anger behind them.

Mom speaks up "Yes, you know the room." She says and Bella grabs her duffle bag before holding my hand and we walk up to the third floor and to Bella's temporary room. She drops the duffle bag at the corner of the room and sits on the bed.

I sit down next to her and rub her back "You ok, baby?" I ask lowly. "I'm just so…. Mad." She says and I see her jaw tense again under the pressure she is doing to it. "Shhh, calm down baby. Everything will be fine. This will pass." I say and pull her to me. We lay down on the bed side my side as she hides her head in my shoulder.

"I know I did a lot of bad things Alice, but is this somehow my punishment?" she asks lowly. I shake my head "No baby, this isn't a punishment. It's a new experience. We get to live together for a couple weeks, that's going to be fun." I mumble.

She pulls me close and pulls away to just look in my eyes. She cups my face with her hand and runs her thumb along my jaw "I've been neglecting you for the past few weeks, I'm sorry for that." She says. I shake my head and touch my lips to hers "We are fine." I say and she smiles. "How did I ever get so luck as to have you in my life?" she asks. I shrug "I'm just noble like that." I joke and she laughs lowly.

"I love you." she sighs her eyes shining bright; I wink "Love you too baby." I say. "So, was it you that went through and ransacked my room?" Bella asks. I chuckle "Yes, that was me. How did you know?" I ask. My clothes weren't folded and I'm missing a few items." She says wincing.

"Those items are in your metal box, in your closet." I say and Bella winces. "Well fuck, here me thinking I just got out of trouble." She mumbles. I lift an eyebrow "You think?" I ask and she gives me a sheepish smile. I frown "I thought you quit the hard stuff, that's what you told me." I say.

Bella sighs and bites her lip "I did, but… I haven't been able to sleep well for the past few days and well. I needed a little pick me up. I only did two lines though." She says. I lift an eyebrow and she lifts both of hers "I swear Ali, I only did two lines." She says.

I smile and shake my head "You are in so much trouble, Bella." I mumble as I rest my forehead on hers. "How many dates will I have to take you on to make you not mad at me?" she asks. I look at her eyes "A hell of a lot." I state and she frowns. "Understandable." She mumbles.

"Did you happen to see anything else in that metal box?" she asks. I nod against her forehead "I should be mad at you for going through my stuff." She mumbles. I laugh lowly "I'm not the one lying about using drugs and hiding them around my room." I quip. She grimace's "Ok, fair enough." She mumbles.

"So… you and Siena?" I ask. She sighs and lies on her back looking at the roof. "I never slept with Siena." She states. I frown "really?" I ask. She laughs lowly "Yeah, strange as that may seem. Me and Siena… we were never a couple, not officially anyway. You could say she was my summer romance. We would go on dates and snuggle and laugh and enjoy each other's company. We would get in to lots of trouble and she would help me get girls and vice versa. We would make out and flirt but… she was the only person I couldn't have. And she knew that." Bella laughs as she looks at me.

"It was nothing like how I feel for you Alice. You could call Siena a crush, a phantom of something I felt for her. But, when I was going to ask her out and try to make a relationship out of it… she vanished. No letter, call, text. No, nothing. She just disappeared. Returned around two years later and completely and utterly was against me. The only reason she doesn't hate me I think is because she has always had a soft spot for me." Bella says with a shrug.

"I thought for a time that I may have been in love with her, but… I didn't know her. I was in love with the idea of her as cliché as that sounds. I found myself forgetting about her completely after half a year and surprised when she was back." Bella says looking at me.

"Now you on the other hand… you I can't get out of my mind. No matter how hard I tried." Bella says and kisses my temple. I smile a bit "Good, because you are mine." I say and pull her face over to mine so I can kiss her. She hums "Am I now?" she asks against my lips. I nod and push her against the mattress "Yup, one hundred percent mine." I mumble against her lips and she smiles as she holds my head half an inch away. "I'm yours." She states looking in my eyes and I smile as I kiss her lips once more before breaking it and resting my head on her shoulder.

"You will be the death of me Alice Cullen." She says. I chuckle lowly at her "My silly girl, you should sleep." I mumble and rub her stomach up and down until we both slowly start drifting of in our own bubble of paradise.

Who know love could feel this good?

**A/N: here you go guys! Hope you liked it. Review! All of you! You! and you! oh, and you back there! And you with the face and eyes and lips and nose. Yes, you! no.. no, not you. You. The one next to you!. OMFG don't look behind you! **

**Who am I kidding? I want all of you to review or I will never publish a chapter on this story ever again! lol jks but how awesome would it be for EVERY reader to review? I think it would be a first in fan fiction. So… let's make history!**


	88. Chapter 88

**A/N: Read enjoy! I LOST MY VOICE! :/ I'm going crazy! I need to go to college for some paper work and ask some questions. I don't know how much help that would be now that I can't ask for the paper work I need.**

**I do not own Twilight, if I did I would be SM and I would have more than twenty bucks in my pocket.**

**Ch.88**

**Bpov**

I wake up with Alice running her hand in my hair and tracing my hairline with her thumb.

"Hey, you awake sweetheart?" she asks. I shake my head and snuggle in to Alice's neck,

"No," I mumble. She chuckles as she runs her hands my short hair behind my head, I snuggle in deeper to Alice. I feel her kiss my temple with her plump lips.

"You need to wake up sweetheart, we have dinner soon." She says. I shake my head.

"Sleep, forever," I mumble and feel myself more or less push back into unconsciousness when I feel Alice's lips on my neck. I focus on her lips as they kiss along my neck.

She kisses, nips, and sucks at my neck and I shudder as I break away from unconsciousness. She keeps kissing my neck and I feel myself start to respond to her actions. Slowly I moan against Alice's pillow and that's when she stops and smirks at me. I lean forward and she inches back, I try again and the same thing happens.

"Alice." I pout. She smiles before leaning forward and connecting our lips and straddling my hips at the same time. I stifle a groan against her lips as she pushes me down and just lays on me as we kiss. My hands go from her waist to her thighs and start to massage at her thigh's trying to make her thrust against me.

I drag one hand up, against her ass and up and under her shirt on her back. She wiggles a bit and I bite at her lip teasing her further,

"Fuck, Bella. You're killing me here baby." She breathes against my lips.

"Then give in." I say simply before connecting our lips.

"We have… dinner… with… my… parents." She says between kisses.

"Will Jenks be there?" I ask and she nods. I shake my head "Not interested." I say and pull her face towards mine. She kisses me back giving in to my pressuring when there's a knock on the door. "Alice, Bella. Food is ready." Edward says and walks back down. I groan.

I sigh and Alice rolls off of me and fixes her shirt before looking at me.

"Did you undo my bra?" she asks. I grin "Maybe." I shrug.

"H-how did you… never mind." She says before pulling off her shirt and taking her bra off. I look at her boobs and quickly stand from the bed and pin her against the wall as I start attacking her neck with kisses.

I lower my head down and actually start sucking on her nipples and Alice's hand goes from trying to stop me to pulling me closer. I slowly make our way back to the bed and Alice straddles my lap, she groans and pulls away looking in my eyes which I bet are pitch black.

"After dinner we are going for a drive. A long drive, " She says looking in my eyes. Her hazel eyes have gone black. I nod and kiss her lips one more time before she pushes me away and puts on her bra and shirt and walks out of the room. I run a hand threw my hair and follow after her straightening out my clothes.

Me and Alice walk hand in hand to the dining room and take a seat next to each other. Food has already served and Jenks is talking with Carlisle about something. I'm sitting in the far end corner away from almost the entire family except Rose, who is across from me and Alice who is next to me.

"Thank you for joining us Bella." Jenks says.

I ignore his sarcasm and shrug, "I didn't know my presence was so in demand." I shoot back. He shrugs and continues to talk with Carlisle. I wait until Esme sits down and she smiles,

"Dig in, dig in." She softly says and we all start to eat.

"This is really good, mom." Emmett says and I nod in agreement,

"This tastes better than half the five start restaurants I have eaten at. This is delicious Esme." I say and she smiles,

"Thank you dear." She says and I continue to eat.

"So, Bella what colleges are you thinking of applying for?" Carlisle asks. I choke on my water.

"Um, *cough*, er… I was probably planning on getting a degree on business, but last time I checked we are planning on being under staffed soon so I'll probably head up to Italy and work on the company." I say with a shrug and smirk at Jenks.

"Nonsense, Bella. You will study." Jenks says and that was it. How dare he?! I had to bite my tongue for a second. Did he really think that I was going to just follow his orders? I wiped my mouth.

"Excuse me. May I have a word with you Jenks, outside?" I say standing up from my seat. Jenks takes a gulp of his whine before standing,

"As you wish," he states.

I give Alice's hand a squeeze before me and Jenks walk out and out the front door. I turn on my heels, glaring at him.

"Who the fuck do you think you are, telling me, I can't work on my company? You are full of shit Jenks," I say to him. He shrugs,

"I though you would want to spend a year or two with Alice in college, do fun things. I didn't think you would mind." He shrugs.

I glare at him, "I'm done with people controlling my life. No one controls my life. No one. So whenever you think you can speak for me, you better keep your damn mouth shut Jenks. You're walking on very thin ice with me. Don't tempt me, because I will act. I'm not my father." I say glaring at him. He smirks.

"Oh, I know you're not you're father. Your temper is all over the place and unlike your father, your threats are empty." He says. I chuckle darkly at him,

"There's one thing you're wrong about Jenks. I'm not my father, I don't make threats. I make promises. Remember that." I say before I walk up the steps and back in to the house. I hear Jenks footsteps sounding from behind me.

Once we enter the dining room I wait until Jenks passes me and lift an eyebrow at him. He nods once and I walk back to my seat as he sits on his seat. "I'm sorry for exiting that way, Esme. I apologize." I say and she waves me off. I smile to myself before I continue to eat, I feel Alice's hand on my thigh and I smile at her.

'You ok?' she mouths. I nod and lean to her ear and whisper,

"When am I not?" I ask before kissing her cheek. Alice smiles and leans in to my side before sitting back up and we start eating.

"So… you're Bella's uncle?" Emmett asks. I swallow the potato salad and look at Jenks who smiles.

"In blood, no. In the way that matters yes, I am." He says. Emmett nods,

"Did you know her dad?" he asks and I frown looking at my plate. "Yes, him and i were great friends." Jenks says. My lips twitch but I look down at my plate shifting food around,

"Did you meet Bella's mom?" Rosalie asks and my fork stops moving on the plate.

"Yes, I did. Rene was an amazing woman, a charmer too. She says it's the Swan charm, ha! She had a double dose of charm in her with her and her dad." Jenks laughs. I smile a bit to myself "Did Bella ever tells you of when her mother used to switch jobs like it were a card game?" Jenks asks laughing. I frown a bit, I didn't even know that.

"Did she really?" Alice asks. He laughs,

"One week she was a kindergarten teacher, the next she was attending yoga, the next she was a scuba diver, the next she was a painter and then the worst decision she made she wanted to be a chef." He says and I laugh grabbing my stomach as I roar with laughter.

"Now that I do remember." I laugh wiping a tear from my eye.

"What? She couldn't have been that bad." Esme says. Jenks and I share a look before laughing "She burnt water!" I laugh. Jenks coughs,

"Do you remember the time she set the toaster on fire?" he asks. I laugh,

"And then I tried to put it out with the sink hose while it was still connected." I laugh and I hear the table sharing in our laughter. "O-or the time she wanted to cook pancakes for Charlie, burnt them and blamed you!" and we all laugh.

Pretty much dinner passes that way until we are done and after a long laugh and talk in the living room where Jenks shared some embarrassing childhood stories it was time for him to head back to his hotel. I walk him out keeping my distance from him and he sighs,

"Bella, can we have a cigar?" he asks. I roll my eyes before me and Jenks walk to his car where he takes out two cigars and chops the pieces before handing one to me.

I light mine and he lights his and we slowly start to smoke both sitting on the hood of the rental car. "I'm sorry I'm being a jerk." I state and he laughs,

"I'm sorry I'm being a controlling adult." He says. I look at him frowning,

"Why are you?" I ask. He sighs,

"I blame myself for all of this happening, Bella. You were my responsibility and I let you down," he sighs, "I let you down after everyone else let you down and for that I am truly sorry."

I bump my shoulder with his and offer him a grin before doing the smoke 'O' and Jenks laughs before he does the same.

"I didn't remember some of the things about my mom." I say and he puts an arm on my shoulder,

"It was a long time ago, Bella. When will you stop blaming yourself for something you had no control over?" he asks. I lie,

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I state.

He smirks "You may fool all those people in that room, even your beloved Alice. But you, my dear, cannot fool me. I failed you many times, and, over time, I learned to read your eyes. Bella, I may be hard on you or unfair but in honesty, all I wish to do is teach you that every action has a reaction. I didn't teach you that, so I may be late but I need to teach you that. Hell, your father yelled at me in a dream." He laughs.

"My father showed up in your dreams?" I ask. Jenks nods,

"Oh, and he yelled my dear. I woke up in a cold sweat. Why do you think I got here so early?" he asks and I chuckle,

"I'm not that surprised, he was a hard ass." I say and he chuckles.

"Your father my dear… ha…. That man was batshit crazy…" he sighs, "but he was a genius."

I nod twice before stumping out my cigar,

"As much as I love Cuban cigars Jenks, they mess up my stomach if I smoke the whole thing." I state. He laughs,

"Your father hated them." He laughs as he blows a gust of smoke out. I shrug,

"My father was an odd man." I say.

"You look so much like Rene." He says. I frown,

"No I don't." I state. He nods and traces my jaw line, pokes my nose, my ears, my eye lids and cheek bones.

"All of that is your mother," he says. I smile and he winks before searching his pocket fetching out a golden locket, "Oh, please give this to darling Alice, will you not? And… For the rest." He says fishing out a five hundred bucks, a box of Cuban cigars for Carlisle and a fancy bracelet for Esme and Rose.

"You Italians and your gift giving," I mumble rolling my eyes and he laughs before I give him a quick hug before walking back to the house. I walk in and to the living room.

"Jenks had to leave but he brought gifts for you all," I say and Esme sighs,

"He didn't have to do that," she says. I shrug,

"He's a weird dude." I state.

I give the box of cigars to Carlisle, Rose and Esme their bracelets and Rose her hundred bucks. I gave the guys a hundred bucks each and walk over to Alice with her bill. She shakes her head and I smirk before putting it in her shirt pocket and handing her the chain,

"Jenks told me to give his darling Alice this." I say and she rolls her eyes before grabbing it and looking at in, in her hands.

"A locket?" she asks. I nod and she unclasps it and I see my picture and hers in front of the Eifel tower. I smile,

"He kept the pictures." I say looking at it. On the other side is me and Alice on the boat, the picture was taken from the bridge.

"He followed us?" Alice asks. I chuckle,

"I asked him to follow so that he could take a picture when I… when I proposed." I mumble before looking out the window. Alice holds my hand,

"I need to show you something." She says before dragging me up the stairs and to her room.

In her room she looks for her jewellery box and when she finds the thing she wanted she takes a seat next to me on the bed. She places something in my palm and when I open my fist… it's the ring I gave her.

"H-how did you… You kept it?" I ask looking in her eyes. She nods,

"Of course I kept it, I never stopped loving you." she says.

I bite my lips as I hold the ring in my hand before looking at her, I kneel on the ground next to the bed and she looks in my eyes.

"Mary Alice Cullen. I let you think I didn't love you once and I will never be done making up for it. Will you do me the incredible honour of marrying me one day?" I ask swallowing. She smiles before nodding,

"I can't wait until the day I will be Mary Alice Swan Cullen." She says and I lean forward capturing her lips in a searing kiss.

My life was finally on track, a few more loose ends and my life with Alice would be perfect. My life for once would be perfect. I still don't know if God is real but, if there is one. Thank you.

**A/N: I BET YOU WERE NOT EXPECTING THAT! Review!**


	89. Chapter 89

**A/N: Hey, what's up? Cool! Omfg…. I sound like fucking Dora :o I kinda hate myself right now…. Fucking Amarillo! And amario! Fucking stupid Dora…. She ruined Spanish for all of us…. Especially me seeing as I am Latina… stupid Dora.**

**I do not own Twilight, I wish I did though…**

**Ch.89**

**Bpov**

She said yes… again. I can't believe she said yes. SHE FUCKING SAID YES! "Alice, do you have any idea that you have made me the happiest woman in the whole fucking word?" I ask against her lips. She chuckles as she knots a hand in my hair, "Do you have any idea that I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you?" Alice asks and I just pull her close to hug her.

I fucking love her so much, I feel like I can't breathe. Alice kisses my cheek and I kiss her lips. "How about we go for that drive?" I ask. She nods and we slowly walk down the stairs laughing and chuckling I stop at the stairs when I see Carlisle.

"Um, Carlisle do you mind if I take Alice for a drive? We will be back before eleven." I say smiling a bit at him. He smiles and nods "Be careful, and don't speed. Oh, and wear your seat belts." He says. I nod and Alice jumps over to him and kisses his cheek, "Thanks dad." She says before twirling over to me grabbing my hand and dragging me out to the doors.

**Esmepov**

"Well, the girls are heading out for a drive in Alice's Porsche." Carlisle sighs as he walks over and sits in the couch with the rest of us. He takes a sip of his coffee "A drive?" I ask. He nods and the kids chuckle before settling down watching the movie.

Carlisle frowns "What's wrong with a drive?" he asks me. I try to hide my smirk at my husband. He may be a doctor but sometimes with his daughter he is clueless. "Honey…" I trail off not being able to find a word to lessen the blow.

"Yes?" he asks. I sigh and role my eyes at myself "They're going to go have sex." I say and Carlisle spits out his coffee as he chokes on it. I laugh and so do the kids as I pat his back "You ok sweetheart?" I ask. "T-there going to go have sex? In a car?" he asks. I laugh at him.

"Don't be a hypocrite, if I remember correctly you loved to go for night drives in your mustang when we were dating." I say and the kids roar with laughter as Carlisle blushes. I kiss his cheek "It's part of growing up, she can't be our little girl forever." I say.

He sighs "I guess you're right but still… Edward. No sex until you two are married." He snaps and Edward and Jaspers head snaps to their father. They open their mouths but Emmett's loud laughter and Rosalie's giggles don't stop.

"Edward you're grounded! Jasper, go to your room." Carlisle snaps and I can't help laughing. "Carlisle, calm down. Son, do what you want on your free time. Only not when mommy and daddy are home." I say and they both blush and nod.

Carlisle sighs. "Sorry boys." He mumbles and I look over to see Emmett and Rosalie crying with laughter, red faces and all. "Rosalie Lillian Hale Cullen." I snap and she opens her eyes sitting up straight. "You be safe." I say and she nods "Yes, ma'am." And Emmett pails.

I smile at Carlisle "Happy?" ii ask and he chuckles. "Yes, we scared our children for life. Our job as parents is completed." He sighs and leans back in the sofa. I can't help but laugh at his absurdness as I lean back and snuggle in to his side.

**~~~~~~~~Apov and sexual content ahead, skip to the next bold line.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

I'd be more upset about Bella driving my car if I didn't trust her behind the wheel. I know she's good at driving fast so I let her do her thing as laugh and chuckle at how she looks around the street over and over and over.

Once she slows down the car and enters a logging road she shuts off the car lowers the windows down a bit and we hop in to the back seat. As soon as Bella is in the back seat I start to kiss her lips furiously. I'm trying to get the message that you are mine and I love you threw to her.

She seems to smile against my lips as she starts to lie down on her back and I hover over her. "God, I love you." she mumbles and I kiss her hard while I tangle my hand in her hair and role my hips against hers. "Love you." I mumble as I start to tug at her shirt.

She leans up and takes off her long sleeved onyx shirt and I notice that she wasn't wearing a bra. I make quick work of taking of my shirt and bra so that we are both in jeans. I start to kiss my way down her neck, and she falls back with a chuckle as I pin her hands to her sides as I slowly kiss my way down to the valley of her breasts.

I hear her breathing start to get harsher and I smirk up at her "You ok sweetheart?" I ask with a chuckle. She nods "Y-yeah." She mumbles. "Just lie down and relax baby, I'm taking care of you." I mumble as I start to kiss down to her stomach smiling when the muscles twitch under my lips. I straighten and kiss her lips before unbuttoning her jeans.

I lower them a bit and slide my hand so I'm cupping her warm and already wet center. I kiss at her lips biting her bottom one teasingly, "Alice." She moans against my lips as she lifts her heads but I use my hand to pin her hip a bit roughly as I chuckle. "Nu uh, uh." I tsk at her and she huffs as she leans forward for a kiss and I lean back.

"You really should learn that not every situation will be in your control." I say against her ear and she shudders under me as I start to rub her clit slowly, teasing her. I use my body as leverage to keep her front pinned down as I massage her clit. Her moan against my lips and her panting isn't lost on me.

I tease one finger in and feel her body shudder. I slide it in completely and feel her arch her body against mine. "You like that don't you baby?" I ask teasingly as she moans lowly. I start a pace and she gasps as she holds on to my neck as we start rocking to my fast and hard rhythm. I add a second finger and curl every pump, I can feel the sweet trickling down my bare back. "Fuckkk, Alice. Oh, God…." She moans against my neck as I smirk against her neck before placing kisses on it.

"I love you." I moan when one of her thrust makes me grind on her thy. "Fuck, baby just like that." I groan lowly as I feel her start to clench. She is so close so quick its odd. Usually it's very tactful to make her cum that quick.

Maybe me alpha female likes to be dominated way too much for her own good. I nip at her ear "Take it all, baby." I quote from a few days back when she used those same words on me, they had me playing on the verge until she pushed me over.

She moans back "You like when I fuck you like this, Bella? You like when I'm in control sweetheart?" I ask and she gasps "Y-yes." She gasps and I kiss her lips teasingly. "You actually make a great sub." I mumble against her lips and she shudders under me telling me that I'm doing exactly the right thing to rile her up.

I push in curling twice inside of her, "You close baby?" I ask and she moans out a yes, I can't help the smile that comes up to my lips as I kiss her neck tentatively soft. I almost pull out and line up a third finger and push in at the same time I say "Cum for me, Bella." It's all it took.

She clenched around my fingers deliciously as a chocked moan escaped Bella's lips as her head fell back and her body shuddered and feel to pieces beneath me. I pull my free arm around her and hold her to me as I rub my thumb against her clit making her orgasm last longer.

Her body quivers under mine before a lazy smile places itself on her lips as she starts to try and control her breathing. I pull out slowly as to not hurt her and lick my fingers clean, God Bella tasted so good. It was sinful.

After I finish licking my fingers I nuzzle in to Bella's neck waiting for her to snap out of her post-orgasm haze. "I love you, my Bella." I mumble lowly relaxing my body on hers, soaking in her warmth. She was always so warm, yet she always complained about feeling cold. Silly girl.

I kiss her neck and I feel her breathing fan out evenly as her eyes flutter open and instantly connect with mine like magnets. She smiles a bit "Hey," she mumbles before leaning down and kissing my lips. I kiss her back eagerly and she doesn't disappoint as her hand quickly goes to unbuttoning my pants.

She wasted no time at all in pulling them down and positioning me so I was straddling her and riding her fingers. "Fucks sake Bella." I groan out when I feel her bite my nipple as she laughs "You love it." she says. "Bitch." I moan and she laughs a bit "Whore." She jokes and I gasp as she hits my sweet spot and I clench around her fingers. "Slut." I mumble not wanting to lose this mind game even if Bella was fucking me senseless.

Bella leans forward so her lips are against my ear as she speaks lowly "Sub." She says adding a third finger and going in even deeper than before. I moan loudly as my head falls back and I more or less start jumping on her.

"Just like that sweetheart, take it all like a good girl. Fuck, you love that dong you. You can try and mimic me all you want but really, you're just a pretty little sub that likes to be told what to do." Bella mocks in her silk sexy voice that instead of infuriating me just fucking turns me to goo.

In no time with her silk sex words and her fingers working there magic I'm so coiled it hurts, I feel hallow and fuck I can tell it will be a good one. "C-c-close… fuck, so close Bella." I moan as she sucks on my nipples furiously. They're going to be so tender tomorrow.

She blows a puff of air against my nipples before looking in my eyes, her eyes a dark pull of melted onyx that shine even in the dark light in my car. Her eyes had a spell on me and just as soon as her lips lifted in a smirk and she said the words 'cum for me Alice.' I came undone by her.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~End of sex scene. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

I collapsed and blacked out in what only could be described as pure ecstasy. I was trapped in a dark space with only pleasure as my guideline and soon after what felt like an eternity of pleasure but must have only been a minute or so my eyes flutter open to see a smirking Bella looking down at me with only adoration and love in her black eyes.

"I love you." she says softly running her thumb across my jaw line. I snuggle in to her side, enjoying our closeness. She smiles and kisses my cheek "I love you too." I say softly and she sighs deeply. Then I feel her shoulders start to shake, slowly at first then faster and as I look up to her I see her hand covering her face from me.

She bites her lips and I frown. "Bella? Baby are you ok? Don't cry." I say quickly but am cut short when Bella explodes with a roaring laughter that I do not understand. She roars with laughter again and again and I chuckle and laugh along with her.

What? Her laugh is one of those laughs that are just contagious. She was laughing so hard tears were streaming down her red face. "Oh, Oh my… oh my God…. I can't…. T-this is too much….. Hahahahahah A-Alice please….. Hahahah make it stop-p-p-p it hu-hu-hurts." She laughs grabbing hold of her ribs.

I frown "What? Stop what?" I ask and she shakes her head closing her eyes and starts to concentrate on her breathing. After a long five minutes of just Bella breathing she sighs and looks at me. Her lips twitch before she licks her lips. "Alice… y-your.." she trails off with a chuckle and I punch her arm and she chuckles and breathes quickly before saying it quickly.

"Alice you squirted in your new sports car and tomorrow we have school and you're car smells like sex." She says. I look down to see that indeed my pants look like they were peed on but the slickness around my center told me it wasn't pee.

"Bella." I say sweetly. She lifts an eyebrow "yes?" she asks. "Fuck you." I say smiling before I jump out of the side door and pull my pants off and pop the trunk. 'Thanks mom for always telling me to keep spare clothes in my trunk' I put clean pants on and reach back in the car for my shirt. Bella scrambles to pull her pants up and slide a shirt on before wrapping me in a hug from behind.

"It was amazing and you know I'll clean that car tomorrow when we get home from school." She says against my neck. She breathes in a deep breath before smiling and walking to the middle of the wide dirt path.

"I'M GOING TO MARRY ALICE CULLEN! I'M IN LOVE WITH ALICE CULLEN!" Bella yelled up at the woods with a huge grin. It was odd to see Bella so liberated, it was relaxing. She grinned before pulling me close and after running quickly to the car the radio starts to lay a slow song. Bella singing the lyrics lowly to me to the Titanic theme song.

She dances with me nice and slow before twirling me around and just enjoying herself and joking. She looks years younger and fuck, I think I'm falling more and more in love. Like I do every day. I fall just a bit deeper in my love for my mystery and enigma.

I'm slowly cracking the hard shell of Bella Swan. "I love you so much!" she says with a care free laugh and I laugh as ii agree and we pull each other closer.

After a while we have to head back home and Bella just walks up stairs with me. We both walk in to my room leaving the door wide open and crash on the bed above the sheets.

**Bpov**

I sigh deeply and shake my head as I sit up. Fuck, I'm tired. I scratch the back of my head as I disentangle myself from Alice and slowly walk to the balcony and light up my cig. It didn't escape my notice that the door to Alice's room had shut itself.

A smirk plays on my lips as I take my first drag. I shake my head as I blow out a gust of smoke from my lungs, Alice found that picture… she found the picture of me and Siena. Clearing my throat I try to fight off the feeling of abandonment that was never completely blocked out from myself.

I frown as I flick the cig, sending sparks of ash to illuminate as they fall before burning out. Siena… I could have made you happy… I could have made her happy, all she had to do was give me a chance. Why didn't she?

Sighing as I run a hand threw my hair, I guess there's just some things in life you don't need to know Bella… besides, you have Alice now. You're finally happy…

Yes, I am happy. But, I hate lose ends… I really hate lose ends. Siena… I'll get my answers from you soon. Very soon. I just have to be careful of how I do it.

Throwing the unfinished cig over the railing as I walk back to Alice's room. Shutting the door, I take off my jacket and slide back in to bed. I wrap my arms around her sleeping form and she turns before still fast asleep snuggles in to my chest mumbling my name.

I smile at the delicate girl I have in my arms. My own personal angel, how this girl has saved me time and time again. "I will never let you go angel… you will be my wife one day and we can take trips all over the world. You will have a life fit for a queen, you will be so spoiled. You will never want for anything when you are with me." I mumble lowly to her ear.

She snuggles in deeper to my neck, "That sounds nice, sleep Bella. We have school tomorrow." She mumbles and a smile breaks threw my lips. "As you wish Volkova… as you wish…" I mumble and she smiles. "I missed that nick name." she sighs.

I kiss her temple softly, "Good. I love you baby."

**A/N: yay, chapter. Wooooo I'm still alive just kind of discouraged with all the grammar Nazis.**

**Beta/N: Lol, the grammar Nazis are what you have me for! Once again, another great chapter! Hope everyone enjoyed!**


	90. Chapter 90

**A/N: CAN YOU BELIVE IT? 90! FUCK YEAH!Sorry it's a short chap and that I haven't updated in a long time. Sorry!**

**I do not own Twilight, yet…**

**Ch.90**

**Nesspov**

Mom had a long talk with me last night and told me that I am not allowed to hang out with Bella. And she also went on about how I should "not let myself be influenced by her". I had laughed and that had caused an argument. That's probably why I'm walking around town in the middle of the night.

Bella told me that this town was actually safe enough for a midnight stroll but to not go too far. I shake my head, fucking Kate. She just had to throw that ball at her, get a reaction out of Bella, and cause her to lose it. She just had to fuck everything up, it wasn't fair. Because of her, my mom doesn't want me around my own sister.

I feel a few drops fall on my head and slide across my cheek, and I look up to see that the once clear night sky was now cloudy. Great, just great it had to rain. Ha, rain on my parade. Though, I didn't feel like I was having a parade. I felt like I was just... mad.

I had thought of walking to the cemetery and see if I could spot out Dad's grave. But after a bit of thinking I thought that maybe that would be a bit creepy, besides Bella told me she would take me... but I'm not allowed to hang with her. Damn it.

I kick the dirt and put my jacket hood up, I feel my cell buzz in my pocket and pull it out. It's a text from Tera,

_What in the world are you doing in front of my house at this time of night? Freak :P ~T_

I feel the side of my lip twitch and look around to see that I in fact was in front of a house and that in the second story there was a light on and a figure standing there, watching me.

_Well, you're the one watching me, creeper. I was just taking a walk, trying to clear my thoughts. ~N_

I send it and see as the figure who I am not sure is Tera looking at the phone before flipping me off. I can't help the laugh that escapes me.

_Want to come in? My parents are gone for the week, my sis is knocked out. And I am bored. ~T_

_Sure, thanks. ~N_

I walk up the little stone path and lean against the side of the door, I hear the click of the dead bolt and the door slowly opens. I offer Tera a smile "Hey." I say. She smiles "Hey, come on in." she opens the door wider.

I nod and slide in, I wait for her to close the door before following her to what I assume is the living room. "So, what's troubling you're mind?" she asks. I chuckle at her, "Oh, nothing much. My sister got arrested. My mom has forbidden me from seeing her and well, I'm bored." I state.

Tara just looks at me seriously for a long second before scooting over and giving me a hug. I slowly accept the hug. "Thanks." I mumble when we pull away, our faces an inch away from each other's. She smiles "Anytime, are you hungry?" she asks. Just then my stomach growls and she chuckles before shoving my shoulders and standing. I straighten up and follow her through the dark hall until we reach the kitchen.

I sit down at the counter and she shuffles threw the fridge before she gives up there and shuffles threw the cupboard and pulls out a bag I'm microwave popcorn. She takes off the plastic and sticks it in the microwave. "So, you're mom doesn't want you to hang around Bella?" she asks me. I nod "Yup, says she's a bad influence." I say as she hands me a can of Coke. I crack it open and she does the same "She does know she did it kinda defending you, right?" she asks.

I take a gulp "Yeah, she knows." I state. Tera nods a few times, "That sucks, Ness." she says frowning. I shrug and take a sip "Yeah, but she can't stop me from seeing Bells at school." I say with a smirk. I wasn't about to just stop seeing my sister because of this one stupid incident. It's not like Bella shot the bitch or anything. Besides, Kate was the one who was about to beat me up, before Bella saved me earlier. Tera chuckles and takes the popcorn out of the microwave and pours it in a large bowl. "Want to watch a movie?" she asks. I nod and look at my watch. "Yeah, sure. As long as I get home before dawn mom won't find out I was gone." I say and grab the bowl out of Tera's hand and we walk to the living room but she grabs my arm. "I was actually watching a movie in my room before you got here so maybe we can re-start it and watch it?" she asks.

I frown "Um, sure." I say and she leads the way up the stairs. Tera... in a bed. Fuck.. I shake my head and take a calming breath, chill Ness she's your friend. Yeah, she's my friend. My friend... my friend that is fucking hot. "Stop staring at my ass." Tera says and my eyes snap up to her head but, she hasn't looked back. "How did you...?" I trail off.

"Because, you're a total flirt." she says and takes a left. I follow her and she opens her door. A purple room, with black designs on the wall. "Nice room." I say as my eyes scan over her room to see it tidy and neat. Some books in the corner, cd's at the edge of the bed. Laptop on the study table and paper work next to it.

"Thanks, I made the black designs by myself." she states. I smile and look closer to see the black designs are a lot of vines. "That's impressive." I say and she chuckles. "Hardly." she states and sits on the bed. I slowly fallow after her and place the bowl in the middle of the bed before sitting across from her. She rewinds whatever movie it was she was watching and the opening credits start up again.

"Scream 4? I love that movie." I say and she gives me a weak smile. "I've never seen the whole thing, I get kinda scared and end up shutting it off." she admits. I raise an eyebrow as I chuckle "You? Bad ass Tera scared of a widdle scary movie?" I tease. She flips me off.

"Don't worry, I'll keep you safe." I wink. She smiles "Will you now?" she asks. I shrug "If you're good." I say and she laughs "You're such a slime ball." she laughs. I scoff "Please, you want me." I joke as I take my shoes off and lay down on the bed. "What? No I don't." she laughs doing the same. I pull the popcorn bowl up toward us and slowly eat a kernel at a time as my eyes are glued to the first couple scenes of the movie.

"Sure, ya don't. Like I haven't heard that before." I say and she grabs a handful of popcorn and shoves it in my mouth "Hush. We're missing the movie." she says and I nod against her hand before chewing the mouth full. I gulp down a bit of soda and am as good as new.

The movie starts to get scarier half an hour in and I chuckle whenever Tera jumps a bit. After a few more minutes I move the bowl to the floor and scoot up a bit and next time Tera jumps I put an arm around her shoulder and chuckle in her neck. "This scares you?" I ask lowly. She nods and I pull her so that she is leaning on me a bit. I rest my head on hers and just watch the movie.

Tera seemed to stop jumping and at the end of the movie she stretches a bit and looks up "Thanks.. I don't know why I get so scared really. It's silly." she mumbles. I shrug "Seems like a natural response." I say to her. "But you didn't get scared." she states. I chuckle "I also have seen this movie around ten times. I'm a huge fan of the Scream series." I say.

She nods and lightning flashes and she hides in my neck. I chuckle and run my free hand threw her hair as I chuckle. "The movie scared you that much?" I ask her. She shakes her head and I frown "Then what?" I ask. "Thunderstorms freak me out." she says and I look out the window to see that a storm is already pouring. "I can stay here, at least until the storm passes." I offer.

"Really?" she asks. I nod. "No funny business?" she asks, only half teasing. I smile sincerely. "Promise." I say and she lies down. I lay down on the other side and lightning flashes and she grabs my hand. I grin and she sighs "Wipe the grin off your face." she states. I nod, "Promise, no funny business." I state and slowly she drifts and so do I.

I wake up with a jump and look out the window, then I look at the clock 4:55A.M. "Fuck." I groan as I pull off the covers and step in to my shoes. "Wha? What's going on?" Tera mumbles. "It's almost dawn and I fell asleep." I say throwing on my jacket.

"Oh, um... ok." she mumbles and stands "Let me lead you out." she mumbles sleepily. I chuckle and nod "Ok." I say and we walk to the door. She stops there and I step out and look at her. "Thanks for... just being there." she mumbles. I smile "Like wise. My mind was a bit scattered but you just... relaxed me." I say smiling.

"You should get going. Your mom is going to freak out if you're still out." she says. I nod and after looking at Tera once more I walk down her driveway and jog all the way home. I climb up the backyard tree that leads to the back porch and I walked up to my room. I take off my jacket shoes and unlock my door before jumping in bed. Not five minutes later I fall closer to unconsciousness, totally relaxed.

_Can't wait to tell Bella about this._

Tera... Why do I get the feeling you're going to be playing with my heart strings... and that I'll let you? Hmm... I need to talk to Bella. I need her advice on this. I really don't know what to do but I like her. I know I like her and I only met her for the first time today and already we're hitting it off. I grin, she's awesome. Her laugh, her grin, her 'look' she's just awesome.

I know it's soon but... I think I'm crushing on Tera... and I like it.

**Terapov**

I watched Ness go before sleepily heading back up to my room. As I settled into my warm bed, I couldn't help but inhale deeply when I caught the scent of her, still there locked into my sheets.

I had to smile when I thought about earlier. The way that she held me when we watched that movie, and then how she offered to stay here with me when she found out that I was scared of thunderstorms. She didn't make fun of me, or tease me about it. She just… stayed with me. And that meant a lot to me.

I shook my head, feeling myself drifting off to sleep again. I shouldn't be feeling like this. I just met her today, and I can just tell that she's a little player in the making, just like Bella. But she's also cool and sweet, and I can't help but like her.

My last thought before I fall back to sleep in my bed, still warm from when Ness and I laid here before, is that I shouldn't be feeling like this… but I'm not sure that I could stop it if I tried…

**A/N: Sorry no Bellice, I was a bit blocked out from them. Hence why I haven't updated in soooo long. I'm sorry for the wait.**


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